It feel validating to see someone have both. I have both and PTSD. it feels like I'm 1 big Venn diagram of chaos who can't fit in this world. Like I feel extra casted out in autistic and bpd support groups even tho I know that's prob my head lying. It's a tiring life 😟
I was wrongly diagnosed with BPD as a teen. Mostly because I was chronically suicidal and my parents were abusive. Suicide became a special interest of mine. A lot of my bad behavior and strong emotions was a reaction to that. My psychiatrist was a jerk and told me if I didn’t change, I’d end up end a dead-end job with three kids by three different dads. Which was funny since I was a virgin and never sought attention from men. I didn’t have the stormy relationships. I poured most of my time into my special interests and just wasn’t in having a sexual relationship. I knew he was full of it. A few years later in my early 20’s, I was diagnosed with autism. It made a lot of sense once I’d researched it. I’m in my 30’s now, have a college degree, a good job, a stable relationship and zero kids. I’m glad I proved that doctor wrong.
Im afraid of dying alone. But im fine having someone drop me food from an helicopter and leaving me to myself 😂 also im not afraid of abandonment. I do the abandonment, i cant handle relationships 😮😢
I call it, the Dr Jekyll/Mr Hyde syndrome. It's hard to live with and harder for the person who has it. We got our daughter autism therapy but she refused DBT for her BPD. I was the one being used to help regulate mood swings. I knew what to do or say to calm her down. Most of the time she just wanted someone to yell at. I did all I could to try and help her regulate her mood swings, including losing myself. She's still on this planet, but has recently moved out, and I have no idea who I am, or how to get her real therapy. I found an awesome therapist who was helping her, but my daughter felt it was too much work and stopped going.
This is so me! I was living with the knowledge of BPD and having it for several months and always wondered but how did it start and now I realize it's my ASD. ASD Burnout cause this cycle and amplified my BPD traits and also made my ASD more noticeable so now that I know I have issues and especially where they come from and what triggers (sensory and socially) are I feel so much more in control. My ASD makes so much "sense" so that my BPD seems like it's not as obvious anymore and also it feels so freeing to me to know how to manage my ASD and then ultimately be more stable which helps soooo much with BPD issues. Please share your experiences more! I'd love to see how you manage both! Look into what an autistic Burnout looks like and you will realize it looks like BPD but it isn't!
I have ASD, BPD, CPTSD and bipolar (yeah, I checked all the boxes for instability). I have struggled with BPD because I never had much issues with being alone. Honestly ASD made so much sense. Especially sardonic that BPD is misdiagnosed heavily in women, while in fact this is borderline-presenting autistic masking. Also re this combo: it's honestly just so exhausting that I can sleep badly one night, and have 1 good interaction with my partner, and even with my meds I just fly into hypomania (cause a BPD trigger has been validated), which causes me to hear sounds very clearly, which causes me to overload, which causes me to be cranky and apologetic about it afterwards and intensifies the feeling of abandonment (this person is good, and now I'm being bad, black-and-white stuff). Anyway, if ya got any of these or some kind of a combo, know that you deserve to live a better life. Be it medication, therapy, religious practice, we all have to pick ourselves up and take care of ourselves and of the mess our lives can be because of the disorders. Wishing you all the best.
hang in there sandra, i hope u find true peace, therapy wise, trauma wise and diet wise. check out primal scream therapy along with mentalisation based therapy. sure you will find your groove of healing within these
omg - you remind me of me!!!! LOL - Comorbid BPD/ASD/ADHD + gifted (twice exceptional or 2e) - my intelligence cancelled out my ASD/ADHD in school, and I was never diagnosed - developed BPD as a result of massive amounts of parental invalidation & peer bullying as a child, with sprinkles of abuse - then went on to develop physical manifestations of my overwhelmed brain (lots and lots of masking going on) - Psoriasis, PCOS, Psoriatic Arthritis, IBD, and now Paradoxical Pubrorectalis Disorder (Yay). Only just now at 46 starting to figure out what is going on (really crappy healthcare where I live) But your personality is so much like mine.. and your stim - playing with your hair - just like mine. I'm just older. Take good care of yourself - be kind to yourself and try to keep your stress levels low - don't end up with a ton of autoimmune disorders on top of the rest
Take a look at your vitamin deficiencies, do a screening for celiac disease when you can, and consider checking if possible in your country for a mast-cell activation syndrome. I know it sounds random, but it checks a lot of your diagnoses. Personal experience, ASD/BPD/MD-NOS with GI symptoms and a variety of chronic inflammations. I'm starting to recover through a decent supplement therapy, hoping to start a psychological therapy and maybe a pharmacological one. Oh, and consider low-dose naltrexone!
I have been searching and searching for a video like this. I have both and adhd and i just really needed something to relate to and feel validated right now
I've been diagnosed with autism, borderline, anxiety, depression, and now recently PTSD, life sucks so much with all of these. Thank you for sharing your insight into having both, most people seem to think it has to be one or the other but I know from experience it's not always like that.
also just wanted to say - there was this huge misconception growing up that I had no empathy but I know I have so much of it, I'm completely over the gaslighting.
When I was 14 I had a counselor tell me I had no empathy because I was autistic, and I was like "But no, I know I feel empathy, I feel it all the time" and she didn't believe me. I remember once she told me I couldn't feel emotions properly (hilarious with having bpd), and I told her that her words were angering me and that was an emotion, then I walked out.
I have been suspecting, for the past 3 - 4 years, that my diagnosis of BPD (I recieved that in 2011) was accurate but not entirely complete. I am growing pretty convinced at this point. I think I developed BPD becasue I was more succeptable to being traumatized by the specific brands of chaos I had around me, growing up, due to being auitistic. I think a lot of my trauma came from the fact my parents did not know how to handle or even recognize they had an autistic child, nor how to be in a stable relationship or emotionally regulate themselves (their marriage broke down when I was 9 which duplicated one adverse environment into two unique ones that I was tossed between on a weekly basis for the rest of my childhood), and I developed BPD as an autistic person experiencing a this particular adverse childhood. Your video has helped me to feel more convinced I am not making this up in my head and that my BPD comorbid with ASD is actually something others are expiriencing. Thank you for sharing the informatiopn and your expiriences! I found a lot of them very relatable.
I had a similar experience. I was easily traumatized in childhood by pretty much everything and had aspbergers symptoms. Then by 14 I had developed bpd from all the constant trauma with no one around me interested in actually raising me, let alone helping me through all of it.
Same here, I developed bpd from childhood trauma and am just now realizing and exploring an asd diagnosis on top of all my other ones. I’m just now starting to realize the amount of effort I have to put into trying to figure out /understand what other peoples emotions and gestures are trying to tell me if I’m doing the right thing, overthinking overthinking overthinking. I have spent 10+ year in therapy learning and retraining my brain to deal with world. All that time and no one ever thought that it could be that I LITERALLY feel and perceive things differently from others. The ASD just makes so much sense to how my brain actually works. Stunning for me to hear other people’s experiences with this and it feels so nice to not feel so alone in the world. I hate feeling too much😢
It's strange to Me how many people say it's not possible to have both-I too KNOW I have both- Too Many Symptoms not to-If Anything the ASD Exacerbates the BPD in My humble Opinion---Thank You for being one of the few speaking on this
Its possible with be comorbid with almost anything. My sister gas bpd, cptsd, depression, anxiety... I have cptsd, social anxiety, adhd, Dyslexia, the various crap that comes with narcolepsy
thanks for sharing this, I'm diagnosed with ASD and ADHD but I've been thinking that maybe I have BPD as well. I deal a lot with rejection sensitive dysphoria and sometimes it causes me such pain that it's hard for me to explain it without people thinking that I'm being dramatic or that I'm exaggerating. But I truly feel a deep sadness because of RSD, changes (lack of routine or changes in it), hypersensitivity issues, and a lot of frustration because of my failed relationships. I don't understand many social situations and that's frustrating for me. The point is that I feel all of those emotions in a deeply way and those lead me to huge depressive episodes that I can't manage well. I go to therapy but everything I feel is already explained by ADHD and ASD.
Not having empathy I've never heard anything so ridiculous. The level of empathy and sensitivity I have is alone so hard to bare with, this confuses me. I take on the worlds pain, vegan 6 years because I love animals and once I realised what was actually happening to them I went vegan instantly on the spot. I lay awake at night pre medication (clonazepam) I would lay awake at night not only reliving my own trauma but the world's pain also
I definitely think there's a hereditary component to BPD cuz my dad has undiagnosed BPD and I have it (diagnosed). Thank you for sharing your experiences!
It’s so confusing isn’t it! We need more studies to finally determine whether it’s nature or nurture. Thank you for leaving your comment! I really appreciate everyone’s input and opinions!
I have Bpd, depression, social anxiety disorder, suspected adhd and autism. I always thought I just had had anxiety but I have been diagnosed in recent years I have learnt a lot about myself!
Just finding out that I'm autistic later in life, and resonating with ADHD my entire life (so I've made behavior modifications to suit my mindset, generally enjoying passive socialization over direct socialization, but maintaining space and time alone to re-regulate my overworked nervous system), I think I managed to avoid too much negative personality adaptations that I self identify much easier than a lot of neurodiverse people (and can recognize it easily in other people, but did have to learn not to express this if they were not open to me, which took a lot of time and energy to know that most people aren't as open to sharing as I am). I did struggle with BPD like issues, but only when in interpersonal sexual relationships, but outside if them, I do not present with BPD with the general public. My work around for this is to see most people as general public (and be sociable and personable instead of intimate and personal with them initially until I have established some rapport with them), but it does make finding your "people" much more difficult and it's also why I am very careful with who I allow to give me advice about my own mind. Autistic people naturally want to mask their insecurities and become more autonomous, and we may do this in a way that increases the likelihood of developing a personality disorder to get there. I had to work extremely hard to let go of BPD and NPD adaptations that I made around relationships so that I don't hurt people who want to love me. I wish you perseverance and joy in your journey.
Yeah I have been diagnosed with a couple of personality disorders about 40 years ago, then adhd about 8 years ago, then being on the Autism Spectrum last year. It's life on hard mode. One thing I learned from the initial assessment is that Personality Disorders can be a symptom of Autism - not a stand-alone diagnosis. So I am pretty old, weird, battling alcoholism all the time and virtually a recluse. My advice to anyone with the same diagnoses? Get a support network while you can. Get an appointment with a doctor and make them aware of what you are going through. Only refer to that doctor in benefit claims. Only request that doctor for appointments. Psychiatrists are okay for reports, but useless to help. I managed to estrange nearly my whole family because of my strong opinions. You may not be able to get friends, but find support groups and professionals to help. Stick with family and try not to "inform" them where possible. My social phobia has been the worst hindrance of my life, so while you're young please get some email or phone numbers of ppl who can help. I've been surprised this year at how there is help out there. Had to push through the phone phobia and have a 20-minute call with the GP. But he fixed a lot of problems there and then. And finally, try not to resort to drugs, alcohol and promiscuity as I did. It's soul-destroying. You all are stronger because everyone else succumbs to peer pressure and you don't. Stay strong guys. Love you. 👍
Hi I had to reply to your comment because i can relate to some of it. I'm in my late 40s and was diagnosed with bpd traits about 10 years ago. I've also had depression all my life and had to told I have anxiety years ago too. I'm weird and have felt like a Misfit in most situations, even within my own family. I've used alcohol and food to cope for so long, but a good recently quit and its inspired me to do the same. I've always had a difficult relationship with mother, who not long ago told me she thinks she is neurodiverse. My niece has adhd and my nephew is autistic. Friends have suggested I adhd but getting a diagnosis is difficult in UK. Atm I'm struggling with my hoarding problem and it's making me more depressed. Anyway I just wanted to say its great you're advising younger people to get help, because it's so important. It can feel like at an older age its too late. I hope you're doing relatively ok. Take care. D
I have both and every day is a new challenge. I like to isolate myself. Then I feel emptiness and the bpd urge to interact with people. I move outside my safe space and expose myself to stressful situations. It's a constant fight between my autistic side and my bpd side. But sometimes they add up together.
When a lot of people with autism spectrum disorders are diagnosed and grow up with bullying and rejection and being pushed away I know that PTSD developed but I've often wondered if some of my symptoms could be quiet BPD as well. I was bullied and misunderstood stereotyped growing up and did develop PTSD from being yelled at but lately just been noticing that I do have a tendency to split on some family members. One minute I will be talking about the good times I had with them and the next minute I'm ready to punch their lights out (although I never do). I do have these moments where the pain and anger get too much and although I will not say anything I will put my head in my hands and cuss quietly (though I am not openly a cusser). I am having a diagnostic evaluation done and we'll see what happens. God bless you for stepping out and speaking up Glo. It makes me feel not alone out there.
I love the video. I’m autistic as well and I struggle with eye contact and I have sensory difficulties. I don’t know where they got the idea that we lack empathy because I have a lot of empathy and I feel it really intensely and strongly. I’ve noticed that I feel empty, I get really paranoid when I’m stressed, I feel like the world is out to get me, I’m terrified of being abandoned and alone and sometimes I just feel emotionally numb like I can barely feel anything. I loved the video and I could relate a lot with what you were saying
Please make more videos about BPD and autism. I highly suspect I have both but I don't have the thousands it costs to get assessed for asd and I, like some other people in the comments, feel very much like that diagnosis is incomplete, and boy do I EVER relate to what you said about treating one or the other and it actually just making things worse of you don't treat them both. I constantly feel like I'm trying to improve myself and so many things don't seem to work.
Based on my experience with bpd and being neurodivergent, I lack sympathy, not empathy. I can relate to others' experiences and feel bad for them when things go wrong. I just have a hard time expressing it
Thank you for making this video. It's concise and easy to comprehend. I would, however, question the research about low empathy and BPD/ASD. I've studied both in depth and have never observed that in the literature I've examined as a psych nurse. Low empathy is often associated with Narcissistic Personality Disorder. I agree and have experienced all of the other information you presented.
Pretty sure I have both of these. I struggle every day and it’s 24/7. From the moment I wake until my head hits the pillow I am on the edge and talking myself down. Arguing with the worst irrational thoughts. Never being able to trust my own intuition. It’s exhausting and feels impossible to just escape. I’m seeking treatment soon and I HOPE that it’s effective. My nervous system needs a damn break.
Autism and Neglect can look very similar and it's hard to distinguish them. It can get misdiagnosed. Neglect effects brain development, making it look similar. ADHD symptoms overlap too but the root cause is different.
Autism, ADHD, borderline, bipolar- BUT WAIT! THERE’S MORE!! - Panic disorder, depression, anxiety. Let’s add severe sensory sensitivity, constant ear plugs, headphones, migraine glasses covered with polarized sunglasses goggles. No we have severe empathy. Too much in fact a lot. I have to shut mine off to keep from attracting codependent people. I’m so shut off rn. Biggest meltdown of my life yesterday. I woke up so sore & hot flashy. Jesus. This ride ain’t for the faint of heart fo sho. Nice to meet ya sister ^-^
Autism: i dont understand why they are looking at me like that should i say something Bpd: oop they are probably annoyed with me Anxitey: what if they are i have to ask but i dont want to cause trouble Me: Are you mad at me sorry im being annoying arent i im not trying to be sorry
didn’t expect to find such a recent video on this! i feel like i have both and am waiting to go to a professional about it. this was very informative, thank you!
Thanks for making this video, it can be pretty frustrating and even scary to deal with two disorders that are similar yet so different. It's hard living when you have a lot of trouble making new friends but can end up ruining the rare groups you're able to join. It's hard but I believe that despite our past failures we can make it.
Thank you for this! I am one thousand percent certain that I have both! I am diagnosed bpd adhd BUT, ALL of my life I've shown traits that looking back now I can't believe no one saw it. I check so many boxes on the asd side and there are a few symptoms of bpd I don't relate with at all.. I am currently trying to have this figured out, bc my life really needs the help. I also have had su-cide in my brain since I was waaay too young and still battle my damn intrusive brain. I am grateful for spaces like this where we can relate truly to others and relate to us.
I think you have empathy however I think it’s portrayed or projected in a different way. I love how you addressed how you displayed empathy. Thanks for spreading hope. I needed to hear some hope for my relationship with my lovely, fantastic daughter.
it makes me so happy to hear you talk about all this. i thought i was crazy or the only one 😅😭 thank you so much for sharing, much love from chicago 🫶🏻
Here in the States BPD is so heavily stigmatized in males that therapists are encouraged to misdiagnose males with BPD as Autism and Comorbid ADHD. This is because here in the States those diagnosed with BPD have their rights silently removed from them until they are either incarcerated or dead. Which is openly recognized in the psychological circles, to the point they are having to break their oaths to fullfil them. And this is socially considered acceptable. If that is what it means to be neurotypical, than I don't want to fucking be that. How is that for aggressive empathy?
It’s extremely annoying and frustrating how neglectful and prejudice mental health ‘professionals’ are! If you’re a woman you’re just hysterical and if you’re a man you need to ‘man up’. The way neurodiverse people are demonised in this world is heartbreaking, but even more so when you’re in the USA and you have to PAY to be neglected!!! Hope you’re hanging in there🧡
It feels super validating to hear you talk about this. I've been diagnosed with BPD and C-PTSD for ten years and just last Wednesday, when me and my therapist spoke about my "odd behaviours" as a child, he mentioned that it's very likely I'm autistic. They're going to run some tests on me tomorrow and I've been kind of going through an identity crisis ever since then and re-evaluating my whole life, wondering whether I have truly been misdiagnosed for so long, since I do still relate to a lot of the (quiet/internalising) BPD symptoms. So seeing more people that have both - despite it not being the most common comorbid thing - feels somewhat calming to me and I relate a lot to the things you mentioned during your video; gives me some strength to get through the autism assessment tomorrow!
i was diagnosed a couple months ago with BPD, Autism, GAD, and OCD tendencies and my life is hell … idk how to keep doing this honeslty like everything is always sooo challenging for me
People with Autism and BPD definitely have empathy. And you can absolutely argue with science that's one of the main tenets of the scientific process the ability to be corrected.
I'm diagnosed with ASD, ADHD, c-ptsd, depression and social anxiety, but I feel like there is still something missing. I'm getting a new psychiatrist in February & hopefully I can get a diagnoses for bpd as well.
The part about being misunderstood when trying to empathize and connect with someone sharing a similar story and being taken as a narcissist, so hurtful 😣
I also have both. Was originally misdiagnosed with manic depression, but now they rediagnosed me with BPD. I get worried about telling people about the BPD because it's so stereotyped. I also am diagnosed with ADHD but I also suspect that's a misdiagnosis of the other two.
Looking into autism and BPD, I'm starting to think that I have both. It makes my childhood and teen experience so much sense. The reason I started to look into these two specifically is because of something that happened to me recently and struggles with work. I thought I might have ptsd but it could just be autism & bdp that I have all my life and the recent events just made it sort of exploded. I started talking to a psychologist last week so, lets see how it goes
I really do appreciate your video as I’ve been trying to figure out for so long why my mind is the ways that it is!! I have hope for myself now, just starting to self love and self care. 37 years of being trapped by not knowing!!!
Heyy! Thank you for making this video. Thanks to it I do not feel so alone. I am at a mental hospital right now and got told I have autistic traits by both of my psychiatrists, and that along side with bpd I had. Its hell. But again, thank you! About empathy. There are 3 different ones, and one bpd people have at higher levels than regular people(when you see someone is crying, clear evidence of bad situation) but have lowered cognitive empathy. Hope that helps!
And it's so weird to me that people think BPD and autistic people haven't got empathy -- I have hyperempathy and my gf (who has BPD) is also extremely emphatic. I think most researchers aren't asking the right questions, because I can feel no empathy to, let's say, someone not being able to see their favorite musician but I cannot watch news very often or I get super depressed and even cry during it
I've only just found this after scouring the internet. I was actually diagnosed with ASD before I got my BPD diagnosis. Which according to the web appears to be uncommon.
so my best friend has been with me thru both diagnoses & she as over the other day while my maintenance man was putting in my new washer & dryer, and she noticed i was about to have a meltdown before i was she stopped me and said “calm down you’re getting over stimulated” i was like omfg you’re right i covered my ears & let me tell you life got so much better i was able to calm down & release my ears before thanking them & they left. if she didn’t say that i would have had a full blown meltdown with two full grown men in my house i thank god for her everyday
My psychologist's assessment stated both of these as potential diagnoses for me after 22 sessions and now im being referred to specialists... I also have a good few physical conditions so it's been hard. I just turned 22 and I'm from london, wish we could be friends because we seem so similar 😂 even though friendships are so hard 😅❤
Thank you for your channel and videos: I relate to them so much. I have BPD and am going to be tested for Autism, which I'm virtually certain I have. :)
Thank you so much for this information. I have been dianosed with bpd, cptsd, social anxiety, deppression and have medication also for adhd. I have autism traits ( overly sensitive to sounds, lights, surroundings, clothing, makeup and so on and I am very visual. Loving glitter and childish stuff). I am searching the internet to find out more about autism and I belive that I have that. Just not sure how to go further to be diagnosed. I live in Finland so I do not know yet how much understanding we have here for adult female autism traits and how much symptoms you need to have to be diagnosed. I have always been very honest person. I just can not lie to people, I am naive, quiet borderline with difficulties to understand my emotions (mostly when asked how I feel, I can not answer.) I am overly empathetic, too easily forgiving, hate small talk and love to be alone. To outer world I seem like very open and funny person but I get so tired when I am around people. When I get interested in something I lose track of time and just want to learn everything about the subject. As younger I spent my time mostly with animals and in nature and could almost better identify with them than humans. I am definitely following your journey and experiences. Thank you again.
I’m in canada and i relate SO MUCH to your comment. Assessing asd within adult women to the clashing of symptoms. I have adhd & quiet bpd as well but there’s something else. The thing is, women have been socially wired to mask so early on in life that diagnosing them in adulthood is extremely hard. I mask SO MUCH that i have an EXTREMELY hard time knowing who i am deep down (perverse addition from my bpd lol).
@@mindyobusiness6257 I got Tania Marshall's book I am aspien woman yesterday and highly recommend that. There is a lot of stories, symptomlist and good pictures about us women with autistic traits. It was a bit expensive but it is so good and visually beautiful and easy to read. There is also explained about possible other diagnoses that might occur or have been missdiagnosed for example bpd, ptsd, eating disorders etc...It seems that the identity problems are usual in autismspectrum women as they are in bpd as well. I truly can relate to that and special interests that I have a lot!;););)
Thank-you for making vidéos about this. There is of course litterature on this, but so few of you have the courage and wilingness to spread awarness that many don't even understand they have both and that both can exist. I live in a province in Canada where many health professionals and doctors are learning of this this year. Indeed many of them don't believe you exist period! Continue your spreading of the awarness ! It really does save lives and acknowlege your existence!!
Been diagnosed with BPD since after I turned 18. I'm on a wait-list to get tested for autism and ADHD, with my psychiatrist suspecting both. I feel like a walking contradiction.
Good to have you back! 😃 Love your videos! Having both must be beyond difficult... hopefully the diagnosis does give some clarity and will help you going forward! I do think that BDP is also a predisposed/ hereditary illness. Definitely, trauma but also stress/ anxiety work as a catalyst and just make it much worse. I don't have it, but it does seem to sort of run in our family unfortunately 😥
Thank you for posting this. I’m currently going through a mental health assessment and both are potential diagnoses, I’m so confused as obviously I have symptoms of ASD and BPD but they overlap, then there are symptoms that are unique to both that I have too. I think I have both and I’m really hoping that I get diagnosed correctly as I don’t think it’s just one or the other 😫 it’s so confusing
I agree with bpd been from trauma diagnosed with bpd but not scared of abandonment at all never have used to like been alone a lot now been assessed for autism but my team never took it seriously blaming it all on bpd which I don’t agree don’t like dbt groups why would I want to work in a group no way I was also a alcoholic we have so much In common your videos have gave me great validation
I’m 31 and I believe this is my case as well, I would even say I have adhd too lol. I REALLY relate to,you and like you! Ik it’s just one vid ha. I’m subbing! Ps gosh you’re beautiful inside and out :)
Oh my GOOOD! I am so happy I found your channel! Honestly, the way I have been experiencing life is just excruciating and ever since I started to delve deeper into autism and BPD I have learned SO much about why I am the way that I am. I can relate to all of your content, thank you for being an inspiration to anyone who is struggling with one or multiple personality disorders and/or mental illness. I would LOVE to get in touch if you're open to that.
If I recall correctly, the study you’re referring to at around @6:35 did not conclude that people with bpd and people on the autism spectrum lack empathy. I’m fairly certain that it’s findings were specifically referring to people who have *comorbid* bpd and asd, so just people that have BOTH. And even then, it didn’t say that all people diagnosed with comorbid asd and bpd lacked empathy, just that a large portion of them do.
Hey, I have BPD as a diagnosis but I feel I have a lot of ASD traits, because some of my BPD traits clash. How do I go about getting an ASD test to find out if I am? Medication is helping with some of the BPD symptoms but there are so many things I relate to in this video! Thank you for your openness, honesty and sharing your journey. xxx
A lot of autism research is extremely flawed, to the detriment of autistic people. It's only really within the last decade that research started to understand autistic *people*, and that's because it's being done by people with autism now. There's a theory called the double empathy problem that describes what's going on. Neurotypical ways of being are seen as default and correct, so if there's a communication issue, the assumption is that the autist has failed to communicate 'correctly'. But it's obvious to us that autistic people can communicate among each other just fine, so it can't be true that we are incapable of communicating. The double empathy problem reframes this to show that neurotypical people fail in their communication with autistic people just as much as the other way around. And so without reading the study you posted that 'showed' autistic people don't have empathy, I am pretty sure that they made a test in which neurotypical answers are the 'correct' way of having empathy, and answers that deviate from that are wrong and faulty. Because that's been the nature of autism research from the start. It's good that we are starting to move past that.
For me this a first seeing/hearing from someone with the the same diagnosis. So that's good for me and a huge thank you to you for uploading this vid. Instead of expanding to other "disorders" maybe you could show or tell about situations when they just happened and explain how you experienced them and handled them. Maybe I can learn something even though I'm an (maybe in somebodies eyes) old fart compared to you. I was diagnosed 9.5 years ago and just turned 50 a few weeks ago. Excepting and and understanding the diagnosis was really hard for me because on the one hand I have had a lot of different diagnosis before this, on the other hand I got no help after the diagnosis or referral where to get help plus researching what it all actually means was also left to me. At that time dsmV was just released but not yet translated and online info was almost non available. About the dsm, all of them...when you know what it means it reveals that there is something wrong at the core because the second letter : there is not one static in it and the never was. I trust people's own stories more than opinions of some so called specialist who has no neuro diversity but is is neuro typical. And those guys and girls are going to tell us what's what. I don't think so. So again very much and keep going..if you can. Greetings from Netherland
Thank you so much for making this video. I have Autism and I'm convinced I have BPD and ADHD after last night's episode. How easy was it to get diagnosed? Also UK based here too and a lesbian !
My bpd got diagnosed after going to hospital in crisis and they put me in touch with the crisis team (AWFUL) and then someone referred me to get a BPD assessment. From hospital to diagnosis it was about 2 months! My autism assessment was also quite easy to do. I asked my GP for a referral, the wait time was about 8 months!
@@GLOsLife thank you ! I could have gone to crisis team the other day. I'm thinking of asking my GP about it. I have the autism diagnosis... Thank you again and hope you're on the path to happiness now and getting the support you need !
i think the empathy thing is not wrong, i think its not in our nature. its more because you wanna fit in, so you realy lern to read people and get a deep understanding for humans but its not realy attached to emotions. you just know what emotion should be right when you react in certain situations. also theres a good intention for the other person but no real empathy... maybe its somewhere inbetween. also some people mix up empathy with selfrelation. at the end they always get emotional in certain situations of other people because they relate to them selfs somehow, pretty egocentrik trait and the opposite of empathy. but just as a sidethought
I aas seeing someone who was diagnosed with bpd and also has aspergers. It didnt aork out but i didnt know what her deal was but now i know what it is thank you so much.
Good video . I have bpd adhd and ptsd and Id be curious if theres a test with psychiatrists to see if Im on the spectrum . It would help me understand my difficulties . I relate a lot when I hear people talk about being on the spectrum .
I know you mean "copying" personalities and accents because I do that too. But as a weird aside, I wrote mirror-writing and left-handed as soon as I was able to write. I was obsessed with mirrors as a child. I would walk around holding my mirror because "that world" was me and "this world" was not me.
haven't watched the whole video yet, but i wanna comment anyway hihi. i was diagnosed w aspergers at 7. fast forward to last year: i read about bpd and i finally felt like i had found a diagnosis that fit my mood swings, frequent attempts, emptiness etc. my therapist helped me do tests to see if i actually had bpd. she said that i scored high enough for a diagnosis, but she chose not to diagnose me with it because my "autism covered it". i also can't have dbt because of my autism (literally what i was told).
I have BPD, i dont believe i have Autism. I suffer the odd time with sensory problems (noise, movement) I heard that can come from having ADHD and CPSTD, which i have
It can also be because of the borderline personality disorder as it use to be called emotional dysregulation disorder which was linked with sensory issues. Sensory issues just develop because of trauma your brain responds to this trauma and your always on alert and that triggers the sensory issues so yes people with bpd definitely have sensory issues I as an autistic person has way less mood swings If I even have emotions I have thoughts.
It's all the same. People with CPTSD are prone to that response because of the autism. For a decade I thought I was BPD, now I see how autistic I am (I have a 2 year old son who's autistic and that made me research it again), and now I see how I've been autistic since childhood, and took traumatic experiences, for lack of a better word, harder than other people.
I've had the exact crisis you described yesterday. I self diagnosed BPD, but my psychiatrist told me its more likely ASD, level 1 probably, but in that case i cant really place werw my intense longing for having a romantic relationship is coming from, once (and thats not often) i have one i get super clingy, i get triggered by the slightest signal of abandonment. Suicidal ideation started at age 10, which suggest ASD, since BPD usually starts ~18. Do i have just ASD, ASD with BPD traits? Meh.
I’m a gay man with BPD with transient paranoia and psychosis, bipolar II, and high functioning autism. I also suffer from many addictions. My life is a burning hell. My parents are fed up and can’t be emotionally there for me anymore. In fact I have to be there for them. I don’t know what to do anymore. I just want to loose it and scream and hurt myslef. I can barely hold a job and they don’t understand why. They expect so much. But I’ve been burned out since I was 12
I highly highly recommend Wim Hof breathing technique. A lot of breathing techniques help actually, and if you can get Yourself to a psychologist for DBT.
I would like to try and help make some distinction here. Autism is neurological. BPD is a personality disorder. Neurological is hardwired, can not be changed without altering something physically in the brain. Personality disorder is an alteration of how you interact socially as a result of previous social interactions with some degree of trauma, usually. A learned behavior, in theory, can be unlearned or retrained. So, a personality disorder can theoretically be CURED through therapy. If you are autistic, you are autistic first, and developed social problems on top of that, not surprising considering. I think that after someone comes to terms with being autistic and does the research, will find personality disorder as much less a defining characteristic. And thats my rant. AuHD
“Will find personality disorder as much less a defining characteristic” Would you expound on that? I’m not sure what you mean but it sounds like you’re onto something
AuDHDer and neuropsychology registrar here. Early neglect and trauma - which is associated with the development of personality disorders - actually changes the structure and function of the brain. Therefore, this distinction is often a false one. Neurology and psychology interact closely in these conditions. That is why teasing these out requires deep clinical understanding and an interview with the person that focuses on teasing out these things at a micro level. My tone here is genuine and informative - hopefully I'm not coming across as being condescending.
Could you give me some advice? My best friend has Bipolar, BPD and Asperger’s and she’s always blaming me for her behavior. She runs from her problems, she lies, runs away and refuses to deal with it when we get into a fight, she laughs at other peoples pain and wishes harm on them in the name of God (we are both Christian’s), she makes fun of me and others behind our backs, her entire family, ex husband and the father of her daughter (2 different men) and his mother and my parents and me all see her destructive behavior. She’s always making me cry. I have Asperger’s, Depression, Anxiety/Paranoia, ADD, ADHD and false memory disorder. I’m very literal logical and highly sensitive and misinterpret things. I struggle with my own family because they think I’m manipulative and that if something doesn’t fit my agenda I get mad and that I want everyone to agree with me. All of these accusations against me are completely false but I come off that way to others due to being autistic. As a result, my bestie and I are always fighting. I have tried setting boundaries and it doesn’t work. Everyone tells me not to leave her because that won’t help her. I don’t believe in abandoning her because I have been rejected and I don’t run from my problems. I face and confront them head on. She runs from everything and screamed at me that I should grow up and mature and reject people and hurt them for hurting me. When I told her no that’s NOT ok for her to treat people like that she shut me out. I don’t know what to do other than to stay quiet and distance myself. Any advice on how to save my friendship with her? She’s the only friend I have left because my other friends left me for various reasons because I used to be a toxic person as a teenager and young adult in college. I have recovered but people still see me as the person I used to be. My autistic friends left me because they are against autistic people thinking for themselves. My individuality threatens them. I’m in over my head with my bestie and want to help her but I don’t know how so any advice you have would help but please don’t ask me to leave her because I’m not willing to do that.
Dude I have Autism, BPD and PTSD, so not exactly the same things, but 2/3. Your friend is just a shitty person. Her mental health disorders and autism are no excuse for bullying people, laughing at others pain and purposely hurting people. It's got nothing to do with her disorders and everything to do with who she is as a person. Simply, don't be friends with her. You are worth more than sticking by someone who doesn't want to help themselves, makes excuses for their behaviour and treats you worse than the shit from the bottom of her shoe. 💀
I have been diagnosed with GAD for 5 years and have been seeing a therapist for the entirety of that time and haven’t gotten better and so far all I’ve gotten is BPD and OCPD tendencies and anytime I mention the possibility of ASD I get told I watch too much tiktok
Nice one I suspect I also have autism and adhd -undiagnosed. But bpd over ten years ago now. So similar especially with how you empathise I do the same thing 😊🤗
Recently diagnosed ASD and BPD at age 82. I feel like I have been masking my whole life and now that's all there is. A mask with BPD.
I love u whoever you are
It feel validating to see someone have both. I have both and PTSD. it feels like I'm 1 big Venn diagram of chaos who can't fit in this world. Like I feel extra casted out in autistic and bpd support groups even tho I know that's prob my head lying. It's a tiring life 😟
Support groups on Facebook are hell tbh, I’ve only ever found really good and genuine peer support from the Twitter communities!
Absolutely exhausting-- I want to be out of my own head but in a streamlined one
I feel you!!!! I have all 3 aswell and it suckkks
I was wrongly diagnosed with BPD as a teen. Mostly because I was chronically suicidal and my parents were abusive. Suicide became a special interest of mine. A lot of my bad behavior and strong emotions was a reaction to that. My psychiatrist was a jerk and told me if I didn’t change, I’d end up end a dead-end job with three kids by three different dads. Which was funny since I was a virgin and never sought attention from men. I didn’t have the stormy relationships. I poured most of my time into my special interests and just wasn’t in having a sexual relationship. I knew he was full of it.
A few years later in my early 20’s, I was diagnosed with autism. It made a lot of sense once I’d researched it. I’m in my 30’s now, have a college degree, a good job, a stable relationship and zero kids. I’m glad I proved that doctor wrong.
Autism: I want to be alone
Bordeline: I'm afraid of being alone
Yeah...Man it can be a mess.
Im afraid of dying alone. But im fine having someone drop me food from an helicopter and leaving me to myself 😂 also im not afraid of abandonment. I do the abandonment, i cant handle relationships 😮😢
Borderline : it hurts less chasing people away than them leaving because they found out you're worthless
I call it, the Dr Jekyll/Mr Hyde syndrome.
It's hard to live with and harder for the person who has it. We got our daughter autism therapy but she refused DBT for her BPD. I was the one being used to help regulate mood swings. I knew what to do or say to calm her down. Most of the time she just wanted someone to yell at. I did all I could to try and help her regulate her mood swings, including losing myself. She's still on this planet, but has recently moved out, and I have no idea who I am, or how to get her real therapy. I found an awesome therapist who was helping her, but my daughter felt it was too much work and stopped going.
@@boxonothing4087
Thats so mean and generalizing
Are you a Narc
This is so me! I was living with the knowledge of BPD and having it for several months and always wondered but how did it start and now I realize it's my ASD. ASD Burnout cause this cycle and amplified my BPD traits and also made my ASD more noticeable so now that I know I have issues and especially where they come from and what triggers (sensory and socially) are I feel so much more in control. My ASD makes so much "sense" so that my BPD seems like it's not as obvious anymore and also it feels so freeing to me to know how to manage my ASD and then ultimately be more stable which helps soooo much with BPD issues. Please share your experiences more! I'd love to see how you manage both!
Look into what an autistic Burnout looks like and you will realize it looks like BPD but it isn't!
I have ASD, BPD, CPTSD and bipolar (yeah, I checked all the boxes for instability). I have struggled with BPD because I never had much issues with being alone. Honestly ASD made so much sense. Especially sardonic that BPD is misdiagnosed heavily in women, while in fact this is borderline-presenting autistic masking.
Also re this combo: it's honestly just so exhausting that I can sleep badly one night, and have 1 good interaction with my partner, and even with my meds I just fly into hypomania (cause a BPD trigger has been validated), which causes me to hear sounds very clearly, which causes me to overload, which causes me to be cranky and apologetic about it afterwards and intensifies the feeling of abandonment (this person is good, and now I'm being bad, black-and-white stuff).
Anyway, if ya got any of these or some kind of a combo, know that you deserve to live a better life. Be it medication, therapy, religious practice, we all have to pick ourselves up and take care of ourselves and of the mess our lives can be because of the disorders. Wishing you all the best.
hang in there sandra, i hope u find true peace, therapy wise, trauma wise and diet wise. check out primal scream therapy along with mentalisation based therapy. sure you will find your groove of healing within these
omg - you remind me of me!!!! LOL - Comorbid BPD/ASD/ADHD + gifted (twice exceptional or 2e) - my intelligence cancelled out my ASD/ADHD in school, and I was never diagnosed - developed BPD as a result of massive amounts of parental invalidation & peer bullying as a child, with sprinkles of abuse - then went on to develop physical manifestations of my overwhelmed brain (lots and lots of masking going on) - Psoriasis, PCOS, Psoriatic Arthritis, IBD, and now Paradoxical Pubrorectalis Disorder (Yay). Only just now at 46 starting to figure out what is going on (really crappy healthcare where I live)
But your personality is so much like mine.. and your stim - playing with your hair - just like mine. I'm just older.
Take good care of yourself - be kind to yourself and try to keep your stress levels low - don't end up with a ton of autoimmune disorders on top of the rest
Take a look at your vitamin deficiencies, do a screening for celiac disease when you can, and consider checking if possible in your country for a mast-cell activation syndrome.
I know it sounds random, but it checks a lot of your diagnoses. Personal experience, ASD/BPD/MD-NOS with GI symptoms and a variety of chronic inflammations.
I'm starting to recover through a decent supplement therapy, hoping to start a psychological therapy and maybe a pharmacological one.
Oh, and consider low-dose naltrexone!
I have been searching and searching for a video like this. I have both and adhd and i just really needed something to relate to and feel validated right now
I've been diagnosed with autism, borderline, anxiety, depression, and now recently PTSD, life sucks so much with all of these. Thank you for sharing your insight into having both, most people seem to think it has to be one or the other but I know from experience it's not always like that.
also just wanted to say - there was this huge misconception growing up that I had no empathy but I know I have so much of it, I'm completely over the gaslighting.
When I was 14 I had a counselor tell me I had no empathy because I was autistic, and I was like "But no, I know I feel empathy, I feel it all the time" and she didn't believe me. I remember once she told me I couldn't feel emotions properly (hilarious with having bpd), and I told her that her words were angering me and that was an emotion, then I walked out.
I have been suspecting, for the past 3 - 4 years, that my diagnosis of BPD (I recieved that in 2011) was accurate but not entirely complete. I am growing pretty convinced at this point. I think I developed BPD becasue I was more succeptable to being traumatized by the specific brands of chaos I had around me, growing up, due to being auitistic.
I think a lot of my trauma came from the fact my parents did not know how to handle or even recognize they had an autistic child, nor how to be in a stable relationship or emotionally regulate themselves (their marriage broke down when I was 9 which duplicated one adverse environment into two unique ones that I was tossed between on a weekly basis for the rest of my childhood), and I developed BPD as an autistic person experiencing a this particular adverse childhood.
Your video has helped me to feel more convinced I am not making this up in my head and that my BPD comorbid with ASD is actually something others are expiriencing. Thank you for sharing the informatiopn and your expiriences! I found a lot of them very relatable.
I had a similar experience. I was easily traumatized in childhood by pretty much everything and had aspbergers symptoms. Then by 14 I had developed bpd from all the constant trauma with no one around me interested in actually raising me, let alone helping me through all of it.
Same here, I developed bpd from childhood trauma and am just now realizing and exploring an asd diagnosis on top of all my other ones. I’m just now starting to realize the amount of effort I have to put into trying to figure out /understand what other peoples emotions and gestures are trying to tell me if I’m doing the right thing, overthinking overthinking overthinking. I have spent 10+ year in therapy learning and retraining my brain to deal with world. All that time and no one ever thought that it could be that I LITERALLY feel and perceive things differently from others. The ASD just makes so much sense to how my brain actually works. Stunning for me to hear other people’s experiences with this and it feels so nice to not feel so alone in the world. I hate feeling too much😢
I’m diagnosed with BPD and I think I have autism. I’m having a hell of a time finding a doctor though.
I'm comorbid with BPD and ASD. You're the first video I've seen of someone with both. Glad you shared.
Hi, please share how these diagnosis present themselves. I know I have BPD, but I suspect I have ASD too. Also surprised to see a vid about this.
It's strange to Me how many people say it's not possible to have both-I too KNOW I have both- Too Many Symptoms not to-If Anything the ASD Exacerbates the BPD in My humble Opinion---Thank You for being one of the few speaking on this
Its possible with be comorbid with almost anything.
My sister gas bpd, cptsd, depression, anxiety...
I have cptsd, social anxiety, adhd, Dyslexia, the various crap that comes with narcolepsy
thanks for sharing this, I'm diagnosed with ASD and ADHD but I've been thinking that maybe I have BPD as well. I deal a lot with rejection sensitive dysphoria and sometimes it causes me such pain that it's hard for me to explain it without people thinking that I'm being dramatic or that I'm exaggerating. But I truly feel a deep sadness because of RSD, changes (lack of routine or changes in it), hypersensitivity issues, and a lot of frustration because of my failed relationships. I don't understand many social situations and that's frustrating for me. The point is that I feel all of those emotions in a deeply way and those lead me to huge depressive episodes that I can't manage well. I go to therapy but everything I feel is already explained by ADHD and ASD.
Not having empathy I've never heard anything so ridiculous. The level of empathy and sensitivity I have is alone so hard to bare with, this confuses me.
I take on the worlds pain, vegan 6 years because I love animals and once I realised what was actually happening to them I went vegan instantly on the spot.
I lay awake at night pre medication (clonazepam) I would lay awake at night not only reliving my own trauma but the world's pain also
this! exaclty me, also with veganism it was instantly. i cant believe those studies, it makes no sense
Perfectly said. Hard to bare indeed.
I feel this so much!!
I definitely think there's a hereditary component to BPD cuz my dad has undiagnosed BPD and I have it (diagnosed). Thank you for sharing your experiences!
It’s so confusing isn’t it! We need more studies to finally determine whether it’s nature or nurture. Thank you for leaving your comment! I really appreciate everyone’s input and opinions!
I have Bpd, depression, social anxiety disorder, suspected adhd and autism. I always thought I just had had anxiety but I have been diagnosed in recent years I have learnt a lot about myself!
Just finding out that I'm autistic later in life, and resonating with ADHD my entire life (so I've made behavior modifications to suit my mindset, generally enjoying passive socialization over direct socialization, but maintaining space and time alone to re-regulate my overworked nervous system), I think I managed to avoid too much negative personality adaptations that I self identify much easier than a lot of neurodiverse people (and can recognize it easily in other people, but did have to learn not to express this if they were not open to me, which took a lot of time and energy to know that most people aren't as open to sharing as I am). I did struggle with BPD like issues, but only when in interpersonal sexual relationships, but outside if them, I do not present with BPD with the general public. My work around for this is to see most people as general public (and be sociable and personable instead of intimate and personal with them initially until I have established some rapport with them), but it does make finding your "people" much more difficult and it's also why I am very careful with who I allow to give me advice about my own mind. Autistic people naturally want to mask their insecurities and become more autonomous, and we may do this in a way that increases the likelihood of developing a personality disorder to get there. I had to work extremely hard to let go of BPD and NPD adaptations that I made around relationships so that I don't hurt people who want to love me. I wish you perseverance and joy in your journey.
My bpd splits throws me into autistic meltdowns yippee
Yeah I have been diagnosed with a couple of personality disorders about 40 years ago, then adhd about 8 years ago, then being on the Autism Spectrum last year.
It's life on hard mode.
One thing I learned from the initial assessment is that Personality Disorders can be a symptom of Autism - not a stand-alone diagnosis.
So I am pretty old, weird, battling alcoholism all the time and virtually a recluse.
My advice to anyone with the same diagnoses? Get a support network while you can. Get an appointment with a doctor and make them aware of what you are going through. Only refer to that doctor in benefit claims. Only request that doctor for appointments.
Psychiatrists are okay for reports, but useless to help.
I managed to estrange nearly my whole family because of my strong opinions. You may not be able to get friends, but find support groups and professionals to help. Stick with family and try not to "inform" them where possible.
My social phobia has been the worst hindrance of my life, so while you're young please get some email or phone numbers of ppl who can help. I've been surprised this year at how there is help out there. Had to push through the phone phobia and have a 20-minute call with the GP. But he fixed a lot of problems there and then.
And finally, try not to resort to drugs, alcohol and promiscuity as I did. It's soul-destroying. You all are stronger because everyone else succumbs to peer pressure and you don't.
Stay strong guys. Love you. 👍
Hi I had to reply to your comment because i can relate to some of it. I'm in my late 40s and was diagnosed with bpd traits about 10 years ago. I've also had depression all my life and had to told I have anxiety years ago too. I'm weird and have felt like a Misfit in most situations, even within my own family. I've used alcohol and food to cope for so long, but a good recently quit and its inspired me to do the same.
I've always had a difficult relationship with mother, who not long ago told me she thinks she is neurodiverse. My niece has adhd and my nephew is autistic.
Friends have suggested I adhd but getting a diagnosis is difficult in UK.
Atm I'm struggling with my hoarding problem and it's making me more depressed.
Anyway I just wanted to say its great you're advising younger people to get help, because it's so important. It can feel like at an older age its too late.
I hope you're doing relatively ok. Take care. D
I have autism and BPD too. And I express myself with music. Thanks for sharing
I have both and every day is a new challenge. I like to isolate myself. Then I feel emptiness and the bpd urge to interact with people. I move outside my safe space and expose myself to stressful situations. It's a constant fight between my autistic side and my bpd side. But sometimes they add up together.
When a lot of people with autism spectrum disorders are diagnosed and grow up with bullying and rejection and being pushed away I know that PTSD developed but I've often wondered if some of my symptoms could be quiet BPD as well. I was bullied and misunderstood stereotyped growing up and did develop PTSD from being yelled at but lately just been noticing that I do have a tendency to split on some family members. One minute I will be talking about the good times I had with them and the next minute I'm ready to punch their lights out (although I never do). I do have these moments where the pain and anger get too much and although I will not say anything I will put my head in my hands and cuss quietly (though I am not openly a cusser). I am having a diagnostic evaluation done and we'll see what happens. God bless you for stepping out and speaking up Glo. It makes me feel not alone out there.
I love the video. I’m autistic as well and I struggle with eye contact and I have sensory difficulties. I don’t know where they got the idea that we lack empathy because I have a lot of empathy and I feel it really intensely and strongly. I’ve noticed that I feel empty, I get really paranoid when I’m stressed, I feel like the world is out to get me, I’m terrified of being abandoned and alone and sometimes I just feel emotionally numb like I can barely feel anything. I loved the video and I could relate a lot with what you were saying
Please make more videos about BPD and autism. I highly suspect I have both but I don't have the thousands it costs to get assessed for asd and I, like some other people in the comments, feel very much like that diagnosis is incomplete, and boy do I EVER relate to what you said about treating one or the other and it actually just making things worse of you don't treat them both. I constantly feel like I'm trying to improve myself and so many things don't seem to work.
Based on my experience with bpd and being neurodivergent, I lack sympathy, not empathy. I can relate to others' experiences and feel bad for them when things go wrong. I just have a hard time expressing it
Thank you for making this video. It's concise and easy to comprehend. I would, however, question the research about low empathy and BPD/ASD. I've studied both in depth and have never observed that in the literature I've examined as a psych nurse. Low empathy is often associated with Narcissistic Personality Disorder. I agree and have experienced all of the other information you presented.
Pretty sure I have both of these. I struggle every day and it’s 24/7. From the moment I wake until my head hits the pillow I am on the edge and talking myself down. Arguing with the worst irrational thoughts. Never being able to trust my own intuition. It’s exhausting and feels impossible to just escape. I’m seeking treatment soon and I HOPE that it’s effective. My nervous system needs a damn break.
Sorry for your pain !!
I have BPD and autism too
Same
Autism and Neglect can look very similar and it's hard to distinguish them. It can get misdiagnosed. Neglect effects brain development, making it look similar. ADHD symptoms overlap too but the root cause is different.
.. I would say welcome too the club.. i have a mix, between Autisme, BPD AND.. CPTSD.... nice little mix..
Also, I haven’t been diagnosed but I’m pretty sure I have BPD, ASD, and ADHD as well. But it is hard to know because all three do overlap so much
Autism, ADHD, borderline, bipolar- BUT WAIT! THERE’S MORE!! - Panic disorder, depression, anxiety. Let’s add severe sensory sensitivity, constant ear plugs, headphones, migraine glasses covered with polarized sunglasses goggles. No we have severe empathy. Too much in fact a lot. I have to shut mine off to keep from attracting codependent people. I’m so shut off rn. Biggest meltdown of my life yesterday. I woke up so sore & hot flashy. Jesus.
This ride ain’t for the faint of heart fo sho.
Nice to meet ya sister ^-^
Autism: i dont understand why they are looking at me like that should i say something
Bpd: oop they are probably annoyed with me
Anxitey: what if they are i have to ask but i dont want to cause trouble
Me: Are you mad at me sorry im being annoying arent i im not trying to be sorry
Me as fuckk
Anger is something I struggle with especially during sensory overloads
didn’t expect to find such a recent video on this! i feel like i have both and am waiting to go to a professional about it. this was very informative, thank you!
Thanks for making this video, it can be pretty frustrating and even scary to deal with two disorders that are similar yet so different. It's hard living when you have a lot of trouble making new friends but can end up ruining the rare groups you're able to join. It's hard but I believe that despite our past failures we can make it.
Thank you for this! I am one thousand percent certain that I have both! I am diagnosed bpd adhd BUT, ALL of my life I've shown traits that looking back now I can't believe no one saw it. I check so many boxes on the asd side and there are a few symptoms of bpd I don't relate with at all.. I am currently trying to have this figured out, bc my life really needs the help. I also have had su-cide in my brain since I was waaay too young and still battle my damn intrusive brain. I am grateful for spaces like this where we can relate truly to others and relate to us.
But pretty much everyone “checks boxes” on quite a few disorders . This is the problem with anxiety and self diagnosing ..
I think you have empathy however I think it’s portrayed or projected in a different way. I love how you addressed how you displayed empathy. Thanks for spreading hope. I needed to hear some hope for my relationship with my lovely, fantastic daughter.
it makes me so happy to hear you talk about all this. i thought i was crazy or the only one 😅😭 thank you so much for sharing, much love from chicago 🫶🏻
Here in the States BPD is so heavily stigmatized in males that therapists are encouraged to misdiagnose males with BPD as Autism and Comorbid ADHD. This is because here in the States those diagnosed with BPD have their rights silently removed from them until they are either incarcerated or dead. Which is openly recognized in the psychological circles, to the point they are having to break their oaths to fullfil them. And this is socially considered acceptable.
If that is what it means to be neurotypical, than I don't want to fucking be that.
How is that for aggressive empathy?
It’s extremely annoying and frustrating how neglectful and prejudice mental health ‘professionals’ are!
If you’re a woman you’re just hysterical and if you’re a man you need to ‘man up’. The way neurodiverse people are demonised in this world is heartbreaking, but even more so when you’re in the USA and you have to PAY to be neglected!!! Hope you’re hanging in there🧡
the strongest soldier fr
🙏🏻
I have both and it's such a struggle. Especially when u have a meltdown
Meow schizoaffective bipolar with PTSD. Good times to be had.
It feels super validating to hear you talk about this. I've been diagnosed with BPD and C-PTSD for ten years and just last Wednesday, when me and my therapist spoke about my "odd behaviours" as a child, he mentioned that it's very likely I'm autistic. They're going to run some tests on me tomorrow and I've been kind of going through an identity crisis ever since then and re-evaluating my whole life, wondering whether I have truly been misdiagnosed for so long, since I do still relate to a lot of the (quiet/internalising) BPD symptoms. So seeing more people that have both - despite it not being the most common comorbid thing - feels somewhat calming to me and I relate a lot to the things you mentioned during your video; gives me some strength to get through the autism assessment tomorrow!
i was diagnosed a couple months ago with BPD, Autism, GAD, and OCD tendencies and my life is hell … idk how to keep doing this honeslty like everything is always sooo challenging for me
People with Autism and BPD definitely have empathy. And you can absolutely argue with science that's one of the main tenets of the scientific process the ability to be corrected.
I'm diagnosed with ASD, ADHD, c-ptsd, depression and social anxiety, but I feel like there is still something missing. I'm getting a new psychiatrist in February & hopefully I can get a diagnoses for bpd as well.
The part about being misunderstood when trying to empathize and connect with someone sharing a similar story and being taken as a narcissist, so hurtful 😣
This is what I needed to see because now I don’t feel alone. Thank you
I also have both. Was originally misdiagnosed with manic depression, but now they rediagnosed me with BPD. I get worried about telling people about the BPD because it's so stereotyped. I also am diagnosed with ADHD but I also suspect that's a misdiagnosis of the other two.
Looking into autism and BPD, I'm starting to think that I have both. It makes my childhood and teen experience so much sense. The reason I started to look into these two specifically is because of something that happened to me recently and struggles with work. I thought I might have ptsd but it could just be autism & bdp that I have all my life and the recent events just made it sort of exploded. I started talking to a psychologist last week so, lets see how it goes
I really do appreciate your video as I’ve been trying to figure out for so long why my mind is the ways that it is!! I have hope for myself now, just starting to self love and self care. 37 years of being trapped by not knowing!!!
Heyy! Thank you for making this video. Thanks to it I do not feel so alone. I am at a mental hospital right now and got told I have autistic traits by both of my psychiatrists, and that along side with bpd I had. Its hell. But again, thank you!
About empathy. There are 3 different ones, and one bpd people have at higher levels than regular people(when you see someone is crying, clear evidence of bad situation) but have lowered cognitive empathy. Hope that helps!
Thank you for sharing with us! I am autistic, ADHD and have GAD and depression as comorbidities
And it's so weird to me that people think BPD and autistic people haven't got empathy -- I have hyperempathy and my gf (who has BPD) is also extremely emphatic. I think most researchers aren't asking the right questions, because I can feel no empathy to, let's say, someone not being able to see their favorite musician but I cannot watch news very often or I get super depressed and even cry during it
I've only just found this after scouring the internet. I was actually diagnosed with ASD before I got my BPD diagnosis. Which according to the web appears to be uncommon.
so my best friend has been with me thru both diagnoses & she as over the other day while my maintenance man was putting in my new washer & dryer, and she noticed i was about to have a meltdown before i was she stopped me and said “calm down you’re getting over stimulated” i was like omfg you’re right i covered my ears & let me tell you life got so much better i was able to calm down & release my ears before thanking them & they left. if she didn’t say that i would have had a full blown meltdown with two full grown men in my house i thank god for her everyday
My psychologist's assessment stated both of these as potential diagnoses for me after 22 sessions and now im being referred to specialists... I also have a good few physical conditions so it's been hard. I just turned 22 and I'm from london, wish we could be friends because we seem so similar 😂 even though friendships are so hard 😅❤
Thank you for your channel and videos: I relate to them so much. I have BPD and am going to be tested for Autism, which I'm virtually certain I have. :)
I'm pretty sure I'm autistic and bpd as well.
Same here
Thank you so much for this information.
I have been dianosed with bpd, cptsd, social anxiety, deppression and have medication also for adhd. I have autism traits ( overly sensitive to sounds, lights, surroundings, clothing, makeup and so on and I am very visual. Loving glitter and childish stuff).
I am searching the internet to find out more about autism and I belive that I have that. Just not sure how to go further to be diagnosed. I live in Finland so I do not know yet how much understanding we have here for adult female autism traits and how much symptoms you need to have to be diagnosed.
I have always been very honest person. I just can not lie to people, I am naive, quiet borderline with difficulties to understand my emotions (mostly when asked how I feel, I can not answer.) I am overly empathetic, too easily forgiving, hate small talk and love to be alone. To outer world I seem like very open and funny person but I get so tired when I am around people. When I get interested in something I lose track of time and just want to learn everything about the subject. As younger I spent my time mostly with animals and in nature and could almost better identify with them than humans.
I am definitely following your journey and experiences. Thank you again.
I’m in canada and i relate SO MUCH to your comment. Assessing asd within adult women to the clashing of symptoms. I have adhd & quiet bpd as well but there’s something else. The thing is, women have been socially wired to mask so early on in life that diagnosing them in adulthood is extremely hard. I mask SO MUCH that i have an EXTREMELY hard time knowing who i am deep down (perverse addition from my bpd lol).
@@mindyobusiness6257 I got Tania Marshall's book I am aspien woman yesterday and highly recommend that. There is a lot of stories, symptomlist and good pictures about us women with autistic traits. It was a bit expensive but it is so good and visually beautiful and easy to read. There is also explained about possible other diagnoses that might occur or have been missdiagnosed for example bpd, ptsd, eating disorders etc...It seems that the identity problems are usual in autismspectrum women as they are in bpd as well. I truly can relate to that and special interests that I have a lot!;););)
Thank-you for making vidéos about this. There is of course litterature on this, but so few of you have the courage and wilingness to spread awarness that many don't even understand they have both and that both can exist. I live in a province in Canada where many health professionals and doctors are learning of this this year. Indeed many of them don't believe you exist period! Continue your spreading of the awarness ! It really does save lives and acknowlege your existence!!
I can relate to so much of what you shared here! ASD, ADHD, & BPD? I don't know anything for sure, other than my life has been a mess!
I was recently diagnosed with autism and borderline. It's horrible.
Been diagnosed with BPD since after I turned 18. I'm on a wait-list to get tested for autism and ADHD, with my psychiatrist suspecting both. I feel like a walking contradiction.
@@EclecticallyEccentric BPD is just the best to punch someone in the face
BPD is just the best to punch someone in the face
@@navenlabenhaving BPD is not an excuse to act like an infant though
Good to have you back! 😃
Love your videos!
Having both must be beyond difficult... hopefully the diagnosis does give some clarity and will help you going forward!
I do think that BDP is also a predisposed/ hereditary illness. Definitely, trauma but also stress/ anxiety work as a catalyst and just make it much worse.
I don't have it, but it does seem to sort of run in our family unfortunately 😥
Thank you so much Monique 🥺
We need more research into where bpd actually comes from! Life is hard but getting better at understanding things hehe x
Thank you for posting this. I’m currently going through a mental health assessment and both are potential diagnoses, I’m so confused as obviously I have symptoms of ASD and BPD but they overlap, then there are symptoms that are unique to both that I have too. I think I have both and I’m really hoping that I get diagnosed correctly as I don’t think it’s just one or the other 😫 it’s so confusing
I have bpd, autism and I am a hsp (yes, this is me asking for help) 😭😭😭
I agree with bpd been from trauma diagnosed with bpd but not scared of abandonment at all never have used to like been alone a lot now been assessed for autism but my team never took it seriously blaming it all on bpd which I don’t agree don’t like dbt groups why would I want to work in a group no way I was also a alcoholic we have so much In common your videos have gave me great validation
Well, good to know I'm not the only one with such comorbidities. It's a living hell and you feel even more like a lonely freak...
I’m 31 and I believe this is my case as well, I would even say I have adhd too lol. I REALLY relate to,you and like you! Ik it’s just one vid ha. I’m subbing! Ps gosh you’re beautiful inside and out :)
as someone with bpd and asd, the lack of empathy and sympathy is very present for me as i tend to struggle with understanding the theory of mind
Oh my GOOOD! I am so happy I found your channel! Honestly, the way I have been experiencing life is just excruciating and ever since I started to delve deeper into autism and BPD I have learned SO much about why I am the way that I am. I can relate to all of your content, thank you for being an inspiration to anyone who is struggling with one or multiple personality disorders and/or mental illness. I would LOVE to get in touch if you're open to that.
I said the exact same thing ”can I have both?” And yes, we can haha. Its exhausting. Good to know at least. Happy to see you back!
If I recall correctly, the study you’re referring to at around @6:35 did not conclude that people with bpd and people on the autism spectrum lack empathy. I’m fairly certain that it’s findings were specifically referring to people who have *comorbid* bpd and asd, so just people that have BOTH. And even then, it didn’t say that all people diagnosed with comorbid asd and bpd lacked empathy, just that a large portion of them do.
I’m pretty sure that is what they are saying in the video lol
Edit for typo
Hey, I have BPD as a diagnosis but I feel I have a lot of ASD traits, because some of my BPD traits clash. How do I go about getting an ASD test to find out if I am? Medication is helping with some of the BPD symptoms but there are so many things I relate to in this video! Thank you for your openness, honesty and sharing your journey. xxx
Thank you so much! I think your channel can help me to understand..... a lot. I like how you come across and the direct way you explain!
A lot of autism research is extremely flawed, to the detriment of autistic people. It's only really within the last decade that research started to understand autistic *people*, and that's because it's being done by people with autism now.
There's a theory called the double empathy problem that describes what's going on. Neurotypical ways of being are seen as default and correct, so if there's a communication issue, the assumption is that the autist has failed to communicate 'correctly'. But it's obvious to us that autistic people can communicate among each other just fine, so it can't be true that we are incapable of communicating.
The double empathy problem reframes this to show that neurotypical people fail in their communication with autistic people just as much as the other way around.
And so without reading the study you posted that 'showed' autistic people don't have empathy, I am pretty sure that they made a test in which neurotypical answers are the 'correct' way of having empathy, and answers that deviate from that are wrong and faulty. Because that's been the nature of autism research from the start. It's good that we are starting to move past that.
Your videos are soooo helpful and insightful. ❤ thank you for your content :)
For me this a first seeing/hearing from someone with the the same diagnosis. So that's good for me and a huge thank you to you for uploading this vid. Instead of expanding to other "disorders" maybe you could show or tell about situations when they just happened and explain how you experienced them and handled them. Maybe I can learn something even though I'm an (maybe in somebodies eyes) old fart compared to you. I was diagnosed 9.5 years ago and just turned 50 a few weeks ago. Excepting and and understanding the diagnosis was really hard for me because on the one hand I have had a lot of different diagnosis before this, on the other hand I got no help after the diagnosis or referral where to get help plus researching what it all actually means was also left to me. At that time dsmV was just released but not yet translated and online info was almost non available. About the dsm, all of them...when you know what it means it reveals that there is something wrong at the core because the second letter : there is not one static in it and the never was. I trust people's own stories more than opinions of some so called specialist who has no neuro diversity but is is neuro typical. And those guys and girls are going to tell us what's what. I don't think so.
So again very much and keep going..if you can.
Greetings from Netherland
Girl, I’ve recently been diagnosed with autism, adhd, anxiety and depression and I’m starting to think I have BPD too as well as CPTSD 😭
Thank you so much for making this video. I have Autism and I'm convinced I have BPD and ADHD after last night's episode. How easy was it to get diagnosed? Also UK based here too and a lesbian !
My bpd got diagnosed after going to hospital in crisis and they put me in touch with the crisis team (AWFUL) and then someone referred me to get a BPD assessment. From hospital to diagnosis it was about 2 months!
My autism assessment was also quite easy to do. I asked my GP for a referral, the wait time was about 8 months!
@@GLOsLife thank you ! I could have gone to crisis team the other day. I'm thinking of asking my GP about it. I have the autism diagnosis... Thank you again and hope you're on the path to happiness now and getting the support you need !
Thank you for this. Very helpful. ❤
i think the empathy thing is not wrong, i think its not in our nature. its more because you wanna fit in, so you realy lern to read people and get a deep understanding for humans but its not realy attached to emotions. you just know what emotion should be right when you react in certain situations. also theres a good intention for the other person but no real empathy... maybe its somewhere inbetween.
also some people mix up empathy with selfrelation. at the end they always get emotional in certain situations of other people because they relate to them selfs somehow, pretty egocentrik trait and the opposite of empathy. but just as a sidethought
I can't tell you how good it is to have my number 1 youtuber back :-) You've definitely been missed and I hope you are doing ok :-) Mark The Mod
I aas seeing someone who was diagnosed with bpd and also has aspergers. It didnt aork out but i didnt know what her deal was but now i know what it is thank you so much.
Good video .
I have bpd adhd and ptsd and Id be curious if theres a test with psychiatrists to see if Im on the spectrum . It would help me understand my difficulties . I relate a lot when I hear people talk about being on the spectrum .
Bpd, adhd,cptsd here, and me too. My whole life.
@@Gothgalactica 🖤🤝
Good to see you are doing well
Can I ask, why does no one ever speak about mirroring?
I know you mean "copying" personalities and accents because I do that too.
But as a weird aside, I wrote mirror-writing and left-handed as soon as I was able to write. I was obsessed with mirrors as a child. I would walk around holding my mirror because "that world" was me and "this world" was not me.
haven't watched the whole video yet, but i wanna comment anyway hihi. i was diagnosed w aspergers at 7. fast forward to last year: i read about bpd and i finally felt like i had found a diagnosis that fit my mood swings, frequent attempts, emptiness etc. my therapist helped me do tests to see if i actually had bpd. she said that i scored high enough for a diagnosis, but she chose not to diagnose me with it because my "autism covered it". i also can't have dbt because of my autism (literally what i was told).
oop sorry for dumping this here
You can definitely have both! And you should be able to access DBT if it’s helpful!
I have BPD, i dont believe i have Autism. I suffer the odd time with sensory problems (noise, movement) I heard that can come from having ADHD and CPSTD, which i have
It can also be because of the borderline personality disorder as it use to be called emotional dysregulation disorder which was linked with sensory issues.
Sensory issues just develop because of trauma your brain responds to this trauma and your always on alert and that triggers the sensory issues so yes people with bpd definitely have sensory issues I as an autistic person has way less mood swings If I even have emotions I have thoughts.
It's all the same. People with CPTSD are prone to that response because of the autism. For a decade I thought I was BPD, now I see how autistic I am (I have a 2 year old son who's autistic and that made me research it again), and now I see how I've been autistic since childhood, and took traumatic experiences, for lack of a better word, harder than other people.
Thank you for making this video
I've had the exact crisis you described yesterday. I self diagnosed BPD, but my psychiatrist told me its more likely ASD, level 1 probably, but in that case i cant really place werw my intense longing for having a romantic relationship is coming from, once (and thats not often) i have one i get super clingy, i get triggered by the slightest signal of abandonment.
Suicidal ideation started at age 10, which suggest ASD, since BPD usually starts ~18.
Do i have just ASD, ASD with BPD traits? Meh.
I’m a gay man with BPD with transient paranoia and psychosis, bipolar II, and high functioning autism. I also suffer from many addictions. My life is a burning hell. My parents are fed up and can’t be emotionally there for me anymore. In fact I have to be there for them. I don’t know what to do anymore. I just want to loose it and scream and hurt myslef. I can barely hold a job and they don’t understand why. They expect so much. But I’ve been burned out since I was 12
You can do it man I'm rooting for you
I highly highly recommend Wim Hof breathing technique. A lot of breathing techniques help actually, and if you can get
Yourself to a psychologist for DBT.
Girlie. Trying to figure this out myself and I feel like we express so similarly lmaooooo
I've had people imply that autism negates dealing with borderline! I know that isn't the case
I would like to try and help make some distinction here. Autism is neurological. BPD is a personality disorder. Neurological is hardwired, can not be changed without altering something physically in the brain. Personality disorder is an alteration of how you interact socially as a result of previous social interactions with some degree of trauma, usually. A learned behavior, in theory, can be unlearned or retrained. So, a personality disorder can theoretically be CURED through therapy. If you are autistic, you are autistic first, and developed social problems on top of that, not surprising considering. I think that after someone comes to terms with being autistic and does the research, will find personality disorder as much less a defining characteristic. And thats my rant. AuHD
“Will find personality disorder as much less a defining characteristic”
Would you expound on that? I’m not sure what you mean but it sounds like you’re onto something
Lmao you are so wrong it's not funny. Do some research bpd is neurological, underdeveloped amygdala.
AuDHDer and neuropsychology registrar here.
Early neglect and trauma - which is associated with the development of personality disorders - actually changes the structure and function of the brain.
Therefore, this distinction is often a false one. Neurology and psychology interact closely in these conditions.
That is why teasing these out requires deep clinical understanding and an interview with the person that focuses on teasing out these things at a micro level.
My tone here is genuine and informative - hopefully I'm not coming across as being condescending.
Could you give me some advice? My best friend has Bipolar, BPD and Asperger’s and she’s always blaming me for her behavior. She runs from her problems, she lies, runs away and refuses to deal with it when we get into a fight, she laughs at other peoples pain and wishes harm on them in the name of God (we are both Christian’s), she makes fun of me and others behind our backs, her entire family, ex husband and the father of her daughter (2 different men) and his mother and my parents and me all see her destructive behavior. She’s always making me cry. I have Asperger’s, Depression, Anxiety/Paranoia, ADD, ADHD and false memory disorder. I’m very literal logical and highly sensitive and misinterpret things. I struggle with my own family because they think I’m manipulative and that if something doesn’t fit my agenda I get mad and that I want everyone to agree with me. All of these accusations against me are completely false but I come off that way to others due to being autistic. As a result, my bestie and I are always fighting. I have tried setting boundaries and it doesn’t work. Everyone tells me not to leave her because that won’t help her. I don’t believe in abandoning her because I have been rejected and I don’t run from my problems. I face and confront them head on. She runs from everything and screamed at me that I should grow up and mature and reject people and hurt them for hurting me. When I told her no that’s NOT ok for her to treat people like that she shut me out. I don’t know what to do other than to stay quiet and distance myself. Any advice on how to save my friendship with her? She’s the only friend I have left because my other friends left me for various reasons because I used to be a toxic person as a teenager and young adult in college. I have recovered but people still see me as the person I used to be. My autistic friends left me because they are against autistic people thinking for themselves. My individuality threatens them. I’m in over my head with my bestie and want to help her but I don’t know how so any advice you have would help but please don’t ask me to leave her because I’m not willing to do that.
Dude I have Autism, BPD and PTSD, so not exactly the same things, but 2/3. Your friend is just a shitty person. Her mental health disorders and autism are no excuse for bullying people, laughing at others pain and purposely hurting people. It's got nothing to do with her disorders and everything to do with who she is as a person.
Simply, don't be friends with her. You are worth more than sticking by someone who doesn't want to help themselves, makes excuses for their behaviour and treats you worse than the shit from the bottom of her shoe. 💀
Feel you. It’s so overwhelming that at the end of the day, something in me wants to pray and leave it at that. Seriously, so TIRED
Invalidated!?! Yep that was me.
You have the best hair! 🥰
I have been diagnosed with GAD for 5 years and have been seeing a therapist for the entirety of that time and haven’t gotten better and so far all I’ve gotten is BPD and OCPD tendencies and anytime I mention the possibility of ASD I get told I watch too much tiktok
Nice one I suspect I also have autism and adhd -undiagnosed.
But bpd over ten years ago now. So similar especially with how you empathise I do the same thing 😊🤗