Day in the Life of a Late-Diagnosed Autistic Person in Burnout (Unmasked, Stimming...)
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- čas přidán 21. 08. 2024
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• Ways I Mask As A Late-...
• Re-Learning to 'Stim' ...
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• Childhood Trauma as a ...
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I enjoyed this. My partner has autism. These transparent videos I find on people’s experience with autism helps me to make his life easier. I have been experiencing ADHD burnout and my partner has debilitating chronic pain. I’m looking for work and he is on disability. We have just been existing between his appointments. Our productivity has gone down drastically. I’m trying to be okay with not being as productive and not trying to assign my worth to my productivity. My chores and my volunteer work is about as productive as it gets for me. You are doing well and you are not alone in this journey. 💜
When I am right in the middle of an AuDHD burnout, I can't even get out of bed. I have to have the lights off, curtains closed and my electric blanket on (currently in winter in Aus). As I am coming out of it, I start becoming more productive, but I have to do it really slowly over the course of the day/week. Burnouts happen a lot to me because being late diagnosed (early 50s), I am still not sure when I am masking and when I am not so I push through the physical signals and I just tend to end up in a heap. I am really lucky in that we can afford to have a cleaner once a week and I also have an ironing service which takes away a lot of the stress for me because I feel so guilty due to my lack of productivity. Great video - it helps to feel less alone and removes some of the shame.
Thank you for sharing this ❤
Just yesterday I had quite a few meltdowns and was very very disregulated (hyperventilating, scratching and punching myself etc.) then I thought to just try agresively flapping and was so hesitant cause I feel so much shame around looking or being perceived autistic (even though I am). I was having such a bad meltdown I finally decided to try that and within a MINUTE I stopped hyperventilating and helped me manage my emotions
That made me think about how much im still masking, even if I'm alone so I'm so proud of you for being so open about this. It shows how much time and effort you're put at unmasking and trying to understand how your brain works in order to put support in place that WORKS or you
Thanks for sharing. I love the sea mural on your kitchen wall. I love those graze marmite snacks too, yum!
Aw, thank you for sharing your day Paune. I think you are lovely and you shouldn’t have to feel anything negative about yourself 😊
Love the colours of your kitchen wall. I watch lots of clean and declutering videos daily. Do you think it can be included as a stim? I find them calming.
Of course! Whatever works 😊
I'm in the process of "Realization" right now where I've been researching and investigating, questioning my family members I still talk to and comparing behaviors with my autistic family members. I'm not sure if I'll be able to get a medical diagnosis - I live in the states and our access to affordable medical care is getting worse and worse by the year - so all I can do is seek out other autistics for reference. With that in mind, thank you kindly for sharing these parts of your life with us. It means a lot to those of us who don't have the resources and support we need, if for no other reason than to see parts of ourselves in medically diagnosed people.
Thank you for sharing your video into your private life. It seem to resonate with me too. Take care Paune
I have 1 chihuahua Mojo and 1 cat bootsie.
Thank you for sharing. I'm 52 late self-diagnosed and in the sixth week of Burn Out recovery. Your video helped me tremendously not to judge myself too harshly. Also the additional information on your productivity level was helping. - I'm trying not to judge because I clearly don't know anything about the relationship to your partner, but it made me angry, that you seem to be the only one taking care of your home and the meals. Why wasn't HE cleaning when you couldn't? And why is not HE grocery shopping? I might be projecting because it's a frustration factor for me that my son (23) doesn't bother to do ANYTHING at home and didn't even ask for six weeks why I was not working - all while I was trying to keep it together and bring meals to the table, take care of our three cats and keep the apartment in a somehow liveable space - all while I was sleeping daily for around 18 hours and procrastinating the rest of the day... I'm not sure when the right time for returning back to my office job would be. I don't want to unnecessarily prolong my absence, on the other hand, the thought of returning and having social interaction fills me with dread. Any advice from anybody?
Thank you for your comment, I’m glad my video helped you. Indeed this only shows one day in my life and not the dynamic in our relationship, so it’s easy to judge a bit quickly without knowing the full picture and/or project your own experience/frustration. This happened to be on a Thursday and my partner works full time during the week, providing for both of us financially. He obviously has more time to help around the house on the weekend for example. He also didn’t feel comfortable appearing on camera so I didn’t show any time when he was helping me that day (like I said I didn’t show every second of the day and keep certain things private). He’s AuDHD and also in burnout following his double diagnosis so has executive functioning struggles of his own, that we work around in a way that’s good for both of us. He is the most amazing, supportive, loving, caring person I’ve ever met and helps in every way he can; be it chores around the house or emotional support. This video didn’t show all the times he cooks and cleans when I don’t have energy, all the times he comforts me, etc. This vlog obviously didn’t do him justice because it was about my day, and not his 🙏
@@paunesjourney Thank you so much for responding and sharing this very private information. I‘m so happy you found a partner who is supportive although he himself seems to struggle. I wish you both all the best. Love from Germany ❤️
Lovely video! I'm just about to order some Loop earplugs!! Do you like them?
Yes they’re great, I don’t know how I survived without them for so long 😭
I'm reading it too! Halfway through
I love good mythical morning and good mythical more and also Ear Biscuits.
I want to point out that, whilst doing therapeutic exercises like going through the Unmasking Autism book are great things to do, it is work. It's okay if you find it overwhelming and need to take breaks. Remember that pushing yourself to work during burn is exhausting, listen to your body and only do what you feel comfortable with x
Absolutely ❤️
I love your owl hoody😍. Thanks for sharing so much with us. 😊 Do you know what lead to your burnout? Was it all the diagnosis things you went through?? What usually brings on burnouts for you?? My burnout was from my dad having cancer for 5 years and then him passing away last year, it was such an exhausting time physically and emotionally, trying to help but watching him go through such awful things. I have since then struggled to cope with as much and have a lot less energy.
Thanks for your comment 😊 sorry you went through that. It must have been really tough. I think I’ve been going through waves of burnout over the years since becoming an adult, because of the sheer pressure of societal expectations that I just couldn’t keep up with as an undiagnosed autistic person (on top of all my unresolved trauma). I thought it had to do with my mental and/or physical health. Getting my diagnosis in February and everything surrounding it triggered another (pretty intense) wave that I’ve been in for about 4 months now. I’m ’working’ on slowly coming out of it and breaking the cycle of burnout so it doesn’t become a chronic thing. The other major burnout I had in 2019/2020 was caused by all the pressure of studying and trying to make money at the same time, never feeling like I was doing enough, feeling like a failure (plus all the toxic influence and pressure from my family).
@@paunesjourney Thanks for answering my questions, I hope you are getting out of burnout slowly. I totally agree with what you say about the expectations of society to be productive, I never realised how much pressure there is till you highlighted it. Even well meaning family don't always understand how hard it can be to be continually productive. Thanks again for sharing so much. 👍
😅I also pace when brushing my teeth.