Defunctland: The Bizarre Garfield Dark Ride
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- čas přidán 18. 05. 2022
- In this minisode, Kevin dives deep into the history of Kennywood's Old Mill and the infamous Garfield overlay, Garfield's Nightmare.
History Sources:
David Hahner Jr. - www.amazon.com/Kennywood-Imag...
Brian Butko - / kennywood
Boaz Frankel - www.verylocal.com/garfield-ni...
Video Sources:
Historic Pittsburgh - historicpittsburgh.org/
David Hahner - / @davidhahner3616
Blacklight Attractions - / blacklightattractions
XscreamThrills - / xscreamthrills
RampagingRex Productions - / rampagingrex
TheCoasterMan - / thecoasterman100
WackyWeazle - / wackyweazle
Leonard Kinsey / The Dark Side of Disney - / darksideofdisney
TomWasHere - / tomwasherepgh
Dark Ride Archive - / @darkridearchive8626
The Coaster Spot - / thecoasterspot
Television Archives - / televisionarchives
Amusement Now - / @amusementnow4416
Buy Defunctland T-Shirts:
defunctland.com/store
Donate on Patreon:
/ defunctland
Facebook Group:
/ defunctland-1142494142...
Defunctland Twitter:
/ defunctland
Defunctland Subreddit:
/ defunctland
For more great content, visit defunctland.com
The ride being deliberately made mediocre for capacity reasons is the most Garfield thing ever.
666 likes
@@sam4gaming135 Aha! You have been defeated demon! The beast’s number is gone!
@@thatguythatdrawzz749 let's gooo woohooo
@@nameaboveallnames22he stole my chips
Love this comment..
"Too scary for many children and too Garfield for many adults" also describes me
Come back to my place and we’ll make a lasagna
@@AYVYN aight bet
@@crumbs6393 We’re the pasta though
I wish I was too scary for many children.
I subbed, because surely you have a future making amazing comedy videos!
the one text being completely blurred out (presumably for being extremely graphic) followed by a genuine "Hope this helps!" Made me lose my mind laughing. This was an incredible watch.
SDSDLFKJSJKD I KNOWWWW 😭😭😭😭
Hi there!
*REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED*
Hope this helps!
I was on the floor. Just wow.
TOO MUCH HELP
😂😂😂😂😂HAHAHAHA OMG IM STILL IN STITCHES!!!!!
The fact that there might be people out there who were conceived in the Garfield Nightmare Tunnel is hilarious.
Hope they named the kid garfield
"mommy, how was i made?"
"well, me and your daddy went on this ride called garfield nightmare tunnel."
I feel bad for the people who were conceived in the garfield tunnel like- imagine having the very reason for your existence being tied to this orange cat
@@Haremfucker87 i would giggle if that were me tbh
@@luka-kr3fz agreed- tbh it would be rlly funny esp if u just started pretending u viewed him as your god or smt lmao
"Kennywood employees were given a plastic bat, and instructed that if they saw the naked buttocks of any rider, they were to smack them..." The original "Bonk! Go to horny jail!"
I live in Pittsburgh and I never knew that
"if they saw the naked buttocks of any rider, they were to smack them" -- Someone in my household observed "but surely that's someone's kink!"... then, later when the concept art of the Garfield themed urinal was shown, I had to repeat that observation word for word.
exactly what i thought lol
joke’s on you i’m into that shit
@@mariethememelord9555 Literally.
I'll never get over someone's last vacation before their father died being spoiled by Garfield sex
This has absolutely no context for me, and is extremely funny.
I won't get over the " aerial dumps ", which was in one of the letters...man, that place needs to be burned to the ground again to sanitize it..someone is gonna catch cholera or something else in there,lol
Spoiled? Or... Enhanced 😏
just when you think you've seen all the sentences on the internet
And I thought I seen everything on the internet
The fact that a young man could kiss his boyfriend in safety for the first time because of the Garfield Dark Ride is both emotionally moving, and absolutely hilarious.
garfield protects
"I'm gay, John"
@@viyaGyudon I think you wanted to spell it without the H.
(And that's not just pedantry, it genuinely took me a moment to realise what you were trying to convey, about whom.)
🗽
what if we kissed on the garfield dark ride.. jk. unless...
"update it to appeal to modern audiences" is a phrase that should be accompanied by ominous thunder and lightning every time someone says it.
"appeal to mo-"
"Bob why is there boss music and ominous thunder?"
"Oh it's the new life update"
"God fucking dammit"
Companies: we're updating it for modern audiences
Everyone else: czcams.com/video/JCpnk5OuzUE/video.html
“We need to update it to appeal to modern audiences!”
“…Anyone else notice the lightning?”
Poor Splash mountain...
They’ll make garfield black and Jon a black woman.
I got so invested in the history of Tunnels of Love that Garfield arriving felt like a bag of bricks to the head
We where all in pice but then the Grafield nation atacked
It was surprisingly fascinating.
Making love in the Tunnel of Garf.
Same 😂
Not me. I forgot why I clicked it, reread the title and started skipping ahead to get to the point.
I love how Kevin usually is deappanned and straight forward in delivery, this topic clearly broke him, especially the sign being a mascot. That pushed him over the edge
lol but those arrows are really iconic all over pixburgh!!! he must know
I feel like I would end up saying something rude to that particular mascot. It's so dumb!
"over the edge"
😏
The funny thing is that I don’t even think the sign has a name? Kennywood is my home park and I have NO IDEA what the sign’s name is
@@chipcub2719 I kind of want this in the future. I love how he almost seems to be amused by the absurdity of the mascot.
“if you can be seated within arms reach of another person, someone has found a way to do something on that ride” is so sinister
@@VunderGuy 🤨what?
@@VunderGuygo back to that ket pipe mate 🤡
@@VunderGuy what does that even mean
I feel it’s not only due to proximity but also adrenaline from the ride and being in public. There’s a sense of voyeurism and unlike riding in a car, the couple can be at ease of not having to control the vehicle and also rely on its entertainment to distract nearby passengers
Gotta say" sinister" was not a word that came to mind readily watching this video
I can imagine the employees back then be like.
-Let me get this straight, you are going to pay me money from your own pocket to spank people's bare butt in a dark tunnel as soon as I see them.
-Yes, that's basically what I said.
- I fucking love this job.
The spankee: Joke's on you. I'm into that!
@@esosique5 Imagining discovering you're into spanking/exhibitionism on the Garfield ride
Horny police in a nutshell
Now it's framed that way, I bet people did it on purpose to get spanked, an attraction more than a deterrent.
highly doubt they were getting things straight, ill be real
“The fluorescent splatter was deliberately put there and not the result of 103 years of bad aim.” This is it. The best joke Defunctland has ever told
I have to agree….I really laughed at that one.
I screamed. There are generations decorating that wall. Ancestors. And the ancestors' ancestors.
....aaand it just clicked.
Word up. That joke had me dead.
@@GenkiGanbare How can they be ancestors if they ended up on the walls... at best it's unknown cousins and great uncles ;)
I love Viacom buying Garfield and being like “I want him destroyed entirely with video evidence”
In the words of Bloodborn: "NIGHTMARE SLAIN"
I feel like someone had a personal vendetta against that ride for that.
The threat of that haunted chair ending up on the black market was too high of a risk for Viacom to take.
@@colossaldonut5190 now I'm just imagining someone getting rejected while on that ride and that caused them to want revenge on said ride
The _real_ reason those props were destroyed was because death was the only way those poor characters could ever unsee the things they'd seen in that tunnel.
It’s Viacom. They’re as litigious as they are merciless.
25:54
"Anyways, that was the last vacation I went on with my dad before he died so hope they enjoyed themselves"
Jesus Christ
My favorite one. I don’t know whether to laugh or cry.
WHAT THE HELLLLL 😭😭😭
I laughed so hard at that one. Incredible deadpan from the submitter!
“Armed with a flashlight and a disapproving stare” I CACKLED CAN YOU IMAGINE- I would shit I would be so embarrassed if some teenager getting paid minimum wage cock blocked me in a tunnel of love lmao
When he said armed my head immediately went to "oh they gave the employees guns?!" When he said flashlight I started cackling so hard I had to pause the video. I wasn't even that surprised, like it was a normal thing that a theme park employee would carry a gun around.
I personally would love that job. Mostly due to all the jokes I would make at their expense.
@@KaiDrawsShit03 Employee: "I can hear kissing sounds."
_pulls back slide of his Glock that has KENNYWOOD embossed on the side_
Lmao, the same exact thought went through my head. I actually lost my virginity at action park and got caught in the process.... Was one of the most embarrassing yet exciting time in my life.
@@nikolaikai940 “So what do you work as?”
“Oh well, I’m a sniper at Kennywood park!”
I don’t think I’ve ever heard Kevin so passionate about anything as when he said “YOU CAN MEET. THE SIGN.”
I fully understand I would love to meet the Kennywood sign
It doesn't sound like a statement. It sounds like a demand.
*_Both scare me, Kevin._*
hah yea 28:16
I'm gonna try to get a pic with the sign this summer 🤙
It really reminded me of "A Bubble Guy" from the SeaWorld video.
18:12 "And definitely not the result of 103 years of bad aim"
Lmao
I was shook at that part
Best line in the video. 🤣
☠️ ☠️
now thats a "hol up" line right there, well played for sure
Oh please, the joke is funny, but that wall was right at the beginning of the ride. Not even a high school boy is THAT fast...
aside from the fact that people had literal sexual encounters during the ride, i really love how it was also a place for couples to feel safe to make romantic exchanges. especially when i saw the email about the person who felt comfortable kissing his boyfriend since they were in an enclosed environment with no one to see or judge them
My favorite was the:
"Hi there!
{Giant paragraf of censored text}
Hope this helps!"
@@ascaredmilipede7971 Now I wish I could see all the uncensored versions of those emails
I had my first gay kiss on the haunted pretzel in bushkill, dark rides were definitely where you'd do same sex handyness on school trips because pulling it anywhere else meant you'd get the shit kicked out of you.
🤣 Who says they didnt "make love" there🤣🤣🤣😂🤮😆😆🤣😅
I just love how Kevin says "You can meet the sign!", why is there a mascot version of the Kennywood sign???
Limited options and even more limited imagination
Why not?
The sign in Pittsburgh is iconic. Not only is it a mascot there's also a ride built in the shape of it called the arrow 360. The way people tell each other when they're pants zipper is down is "kennywoods open". Kennywood and the sign are a big cultural part of the city. The sign I believe became iconic because they would hang small signs up all over the city with those arrows pointing to the direction of kennywood. Most people in the city probably have memories of spotting the signs and the building excitement as you get closer and closer. I also gotta mention how these signs were in random fucking places too not on the sides of highways and shit. Like in random residential neighborhoods
28:18, for anyone curious.
@@needaccount94 also the phrase "kennywood's open" meaning that your fly is down. at an eat n park i saw a kennywood sign saying "kennywood's open" pointing down toward a urinal. omg that was the most pittsburgh sentence i've ever written. go steelers.
The pain of being born too late to do narsty stuff on the Garfield dark ride 😔
same,,...,
It's fine, we could kiss in the Donetsk anime store.
@@Mortablunt It's been closed for years
@@miownerwhat the point anymore...
@@themyofmy LOL - point is that no one of age cared about (or is aware of) ANY of the visuals - whether GN or Old Mill. 😅
FYI, it’s back to “Old Mill” once again. Have fun! 🤭
As someone who grew up going to Kennywood as a kid, the sentence “my downstairs got as slippery as the log jammer”, has absolutely wreck my childhood
I had to take a quadruple take on that sentence lmao, can't believe it wasn't censored
🤣
Slippy*
@@shanebauer8091 yinz can’t even redd up yer pittsburghese n’at
lol
I love that roughly 50 years before the meme, Kennywood was bonking people sending them to horny jail. But as a kid I rode this with the skeletons theme for years and never knew any of this history. It was just a great way to start the day because it was a slow ride before the coasters opened, the line wasn't usually long, and it was right at the iconic entrance tunnel.
The last time I went on the ride in 2012, I was most definitely going on with the intent of some of that iconic romantic time. But we were so surprised and impressed by the art put into the unexpected Garfield theming, that we forgot our original intentions and just came out pleasantly surprised at the overhaul.
so fascinated by the artistry you forgot to enjoy the thrill of the old mill
@@potahtwah9591I mean there was only so much thrill on the table since her dad and little brother were in the front of the boat
@Sumguyinavan_ thats called "Challenge Mode"
This is so cute and funny
Is there a single themed toilet/urinal that is not absolutely cursed? I think that no matter how highly thematic your park or building or whatever is, you should leave those alone.
Yeah, pissing doesn’t have to be part of the experience. Most people even children are okay having a break from aggressive theming while they’re peeing.
@@dharmallars Also, I am pretty sure that the toilets in whatever universe the park is themed around does not look like the main characters eagerly awating potential visitors with their jaws agape and eyes wide. I would be really conserned if that was the case.
Maybe just...make the walls the same color/patterns as the bathroom in the series, with the same style of interior decirating with the lights, mirrors, potential art or plants...
Why is it called a restroom I am fighting for my life in here
Single fly decal within the bowl is fun but tasteful.
Based on experience, Disneyland's Star Wars area comes the most close. However, that's kinda cheating because the entire land's aesthetic is industrial grunge
"Today we're going to be talking about a garfield ride in the early 2000s..."
*begins with the history of picnics in the 1800s*
That's the indepth type of lore I can appreciate
Every time I click on a Defunctland video I always ask myself, how many hundreds of years ago is this one going to start? As expected this one did not disappoint
"It was in the middle of March in ancient Rome when events took an unfortunate turn for a man named Gaius Iulius Caesar…"
Welcome to Kennywood, where the theme park is a national historic landmark. :)
If you appreciate lore then I'll mention that in same Pittsburgh area there was a trolley park called Oakford Park in Jeannette PA. Moe and Shemp spent three Summers living above the old post office in town an working at theThe summer theater at Oakford Park. The park got obliterated one year when a amateurish dam above the park burst in a storm dragging the park's coaster thru town. Decades later when visiting the area Moe stayed in Jeannette two streets up from me. I beaned him with a snowball once on first and frothingham.
Let's start at the beginning. The VERY beginning!
“In this minisode…”
*30+ minutes long*
Exactly!
He talks slow enough that this is easily watchable at 2x speed
@@12799MaDeuce it’s still a bit hard
You have reached 666 likes now.
@@CheeseLord7 That's what she said as the boat came to the photo op. Sorry, couldn't pass it up!
You know, with his stoic, deadpan, documentarian delivery, I always forget how funny Kevin is until he just casually drops a precision-guided joke that absolutely levels me. Every. Single. Time.
And then he can manage to tie the whole crude, wild thing up with heartwarming nostalgia AND stories of people being able to feel, maybe for the first time, comfortable in their own skin. This is A+ work. Goddamn.
The joke of having the reveal in a different shape than the shadow was way funnier than it should’ve been
That's a running gag in these!
"Though my ex husband was a disappointment in life in general, me and Garfield were both screaming by the end of the ride" that line is absolutely hilarious, whoever wrote that I hope you know how funny that was
She wrote this gem earlier in the message: “my downstairs got as slippery as the Log Jammer!”
Such a way with words!
@@NotDrDre I guarantee you that 'as slippery as the log jammer' just became memeified for legions of allegheny county kiddos for years to come.
Had the whole squad rollin' 😐
Legendary
E
1
Viacom demanding that the employees destroy all of the set pieces for Garfield's nightmare to ensure they couldn't be sold and having them take videos as proof that they actually destroyed them might be the most on brand thing for Viacom that I've ever heard.
I don't see why the amusement park people had to do it. Viacom should've sent their own representatives to take care of this.
@@BlackoutCreature Nah. Their thugs were too busy going to everyone that uploaded a Spongebob clip's homes and roughed them up. And they say Disney is a horrible company.
@@mightyfilm Disney’s horridness is definitely YMMV, but I think it’s at least generally agreed that Viacom is way worse.
afaik it's actually pretty much the standard for situations like this
Hearing that part disgusted me. No one should be able to just destroy history like that.
Fun fact: if you ever find one of those old Garfield mugs from the 1950s-1960s, DO NOT DRINK FROM IT.
The paint has near lethal amounts of mercury in it (over 100× the minimal safe amount)
You say that like I haven't always wanted to die by being poisoned by Garfield.
Garfield's strip officially started 1978, so how the heck could I find a mug from the 50s-60's when he didn't exist?
I question the "fact" part, but funning folks makes sense, and I'll be sure to not drink from something that is an obvious forgery!
@@ct3po776 I dont think it was from 50s or 60s, but this is a true story. Some Garfield mcdonalds glass cups were made with lead, making them deadly
@@potahtwah9591 yeah and is it true that McDonalds refused to pull them from their meals?
@FunnyTrainFace No, they recalled a lot of them as soon as they heard, but some of the promotions, like Garfield, were long over and McDonalds couldn't get to them. They did urge consumers to stop drinking out of them and trash them as soon as possible
25:58 the message being just “Hi There,” and everything else being censored is simultaneously the funniest and strangely the most terrifying part of this video
The “hope this helps” did me in 😭
Ah, who could forget the time Kevin tweeted to ask for people’s stories of them making love on this ride. Now it’s time to see the fruits of his labor.
I mean there were certainly fruits involved.
@@Johnwicklover1994 true, and agreed.
@@Johnwicklover1994 And probably some labor.
@@S0RGEx I really hope nobody was getting /that/ steamy on the ride :/
@@Johnwicklover1994 let’s be honest they did
I am incredibly concerned about the fact that the shot of the Garfield urinal is apparently the *most watched* part of the video
Haha! I actually went back myself to show it to my GF and comment on how ridiculous things like that are, maybe others did something similar?
Hopefully it was something similar, at least...lol.
I just took a screenshot of it.
It's kinda funny.
“Feed me”
That cursed object is more disturbing than any Garfield creepypasta.
greeting 4 months into the future, it is the gmail that's the most watched now :)
the fact that mr. lying under oath managed to take a video about a garfield ride and turned it into something genuinely profound and heartwarming will never not blow my mind
Huh?
@@AugAug989 The guy's last name is 'Perjurer'
Which is actually the person who does the lying under oath, but still
@@BlackOrderAlchemist bruh
@@VunderGuy what
@@thefoxsaysno9951
I don't think he likes farming equipment that much
28:10 I died laughing. “It’s the sign!... It’s the Kennywood sign!... YOU CAN MEET!... THE SIGN!” 😂
The outrage from the otherwise collected and professional Kevin is one of the funniest things I've ever seen
@@cbot72 Agreed 😂
'Look I can't think of another way to say this, a lot of you were gay in the Garfield dark ride." Best quote ive heard this year
not even wrong! I would be too tbh
theres chemicals in the garfield dark ride that turns the freakin everyone gay
LMFAOOOOO
What time stamp is this I keep on missing it 😭😭😭
@@eustace6046 it's at 33:46
“arguably the biggest change to the old mill in its early years would come after the ride caught on fire and burned to the ground” amazing.
“Arguably” 🤣👌
well tokyo somehow have the best infrastructures after it's full destruction in ww2
@@kakyoindonut3213 what happened to Tokyo?
@@massgunner4152 it got damaged so badly in ww2 that it's not even worth it to get nuked, they rebuild the whole thing and now there's trains and all
@@kakyoindonut3213 danm, old japanese military leaders really were out of their mind.
From 23:40 onwards, hearing him slowly break his deadpan delivery as he builds up to what people got up to on Garfield's Nightmare is incredible
I grew up riding this ride, and when I went back with a couple of friends ten years later we rode it. I cannot express the absolute fear and terror the human mind experiences when staring down the pitch black eyes of John Arbuckle.
Me,too!
💀💀💀
Just played Garfield's Nightmare for DS thanks to this video.... unfortunately it did not inspire in us the same level of lust as the ride did for many others
I cannot wait for this episode
GRUMPS?????
Kevin, please pin this comment chain!
Hella excited to watch this episode-👀💖
Quite a shame the Grumps didn't feel any inspiring strong urge to passionately smooch while playing it though. =,] LMAOO
Ew you guys……
Imagine being told you can't make a ride too good. Baffling.
I used to think the ride was terrible, but after hearing about that directive, I gotta say they knocked it out of the park. Exceptionally average.
@@christhekrug I don't think they knocked it out of the park, because it's located in the same place it always has been.
That's kwood for ya
@@ajvark Legendary.
This made me sad. It sounds like the initial plans for this were spectacular. You think for all the licensing they are paying on it they would want it to be over top popular.
The thought of a young gay couple back in the 50s getting to kiss in the dark of the ride makes me so happy even if they couldn’t express their love publicly they could kiss outside of their homes in a small act of rebellion
It’s bittersweet but more sweet than bitter I think lol
Cringe
@@DameOfDiamonds anime is more cringe
🤮🤮🤮
@Loud & Proud Terf go back to the shadows from whence you came
Seeing an entire story just being redacted shows exactly what you went through for this video. I’m sorry for your loss.
27:39 the image of Garfield staring at you with pitch black eyes saying "you blinked" is genuinely the most terrifying thing I've seen all month. He's about to eat your soul and that's a fact.
You are not wrong. The second panel has the fish's eyes missing too which makes the last panel even more disturbing
withered bonnie from fnaf
"I'M SORRY, JON."
When I first rode this ride all the eyes were already black, and I always thought it was on purpose! Weird to learn that little bit of info.
fucker looks like Sans
"Hi there!
[COMLETELY REDACTED]
Hope that helps!"
The buildup for this was absolutely perfect, with the stories getting crazier and crazier. The comedic timing in this video is top notch
And the music was "bang on"! Sorry, couldn't help it. *ashamed face*
Amazing I laughed so hard
yes, can you believe her ? that filthy _____________ And then when she ______ on his ______ and he _____ his ____ in her____, I almost _____ all over myself.
what could it even possibly be
@@mareksicinski3726 If it was entirely redacted, I don't think we'd want to find out.
It’s very cute that there’s subtle nods to Garf in the revamped Old Mill
The statistically probable "maybe its you" at 26:15 was both terrifying and hilarious
"Having so many people share how this ride impacted them was extremely moving."
Tell that to the guy who saw his friend shit in the water.
That was very bowel moving, I’m sure.
LMAO I got a good laugh out of that!
Bowel-moving! :P
That part of the video was really funny
I guess that guy was disimpacted 🤣😆
The passion you had when you said “ITS THE SIGN. YOU CAN MEET THE SIGN” sent me bro. Been a fan of your stuff for years!
That was pretty funny, but I would like to correct one thing. That is not "The Sign". It's actually "The Kennywood Arrow". They were originally made of metal, had a finger at the tip of the arrow, and were nailed to telephone poles literally MILES AND MILES from the park, pointing in the direction you would drive to get there. Best year-round advertising EVER. Later ones were wood and shaped like the current arrow, but again, they were scattered all over the greater Pittsburgh area and were visible all year long, even when the park was closed.
@@repentandbelieveinjesuschr466 Amen
Yeah now the only one is on the Rankin bridge I think
@@repentandbelieveinjesuschr466 what
@@repentandbelieveinjesuschr466 I thought that said HIV
They may have been going for nightmares that reference Garfield comics, but it definitely does seem like Garfield has been locked into a dreadful purgatory in which he is punished for his dark past
There is a cosmic level of irony that permeates this whole story. My favorite is the citizens opposing amusement parks.
Kenny the Kangaroo not being able to fit in the boat with the new mascots actually made me sad
OH DAMN HE GOT REVENGE
He wasn’t able to lose those extra lbs in time.
It’s funny how an “I’m Sorry, Jon” horror ride these days would bring in millions of dollars.
i would pay to see that ngl
And probably bring just as much money into psychiatrist's pockets from all the trauma.
Imagine making out in the Garfield ride
@@kiartoons2010 "What if we kissed in front of the pizza box monster? Hehehe, just kidding...unless..."
AGH I FINISHED WATCHING THE VIDEO AND I'M SO DISGUSTING WHY DID I PREDICT THIS
As a Pittsburgher this video was a joy, especially the emails, especially the entirety blurred paragraph. I had a friend who worked the old mil often (actually permanently fucked up their foot cause you have to manually push the boats and they were doing that on a broken foot) and this not only lines up completely with what I’ve heard but makes me realize how insane this ride is.
The craziest thing about those emails though is it is entirely possible I know any of those people, but infinitely more likely I simply know multiple adults who got handsy in the Garfield Tunnel.
I am saddened that I will never be able to experience the ride at its height like they were.
25:58
"Hi there! [entire message redacted] Hope this helps!"
Most useful screenshot ever.
"A lot of you were gay in the garfield dark ride" actually sent me, absolute banger video again Kevin thank you
I WAS LOOKING FOR A COMMENT ABOUT THIS I COULDN'T STOP LAUGHING 😭
Who wants to be gay with me in the garfield dark ride???😫
@@ijustlikebees Gross.
Go away.
@@beckigreen oh okay❤️
@@ijustlikebees im listening 😏
"too scary for some children, and too Garfield for many adults" cracked me up so bad. great video as always!
As someone who went on it as a child many times… I can confirm the accuracy of this line
@John-Paul Hunt ok
Garfield was always kind-of scary. When I was a kid, my Dad made a mix VHS with holiday episodes ranging from Halloween through Christmas (yes, it ended with The Grinch stealing stuff from the Whos and cut-off because it was a VHS from the '80's; I thought The Grinch really DID manage to steal Christmas for years, but I digress). Garfield's Halloween was the first special on the VHS. I always skipped through the end because the old creepy man in front of the fire scared the crap out of me. I was afraid of in-home fireplaces until we moved to a house with one and I was forced to get over my fear. That would probably mean I had a weird phobia for about six years. Thanks, Garfield! I knew there was a reason to be a dog person!
@@kateealer7 And then there's "What The Internet Did To Garfield"
There’s no such thing as “too much Garfield”
I went here one time as a kid and remembered being terrified by a ride but didn’t know what is was, and I’ll be damned it’s a Garfield ride
Honestly, I'd like to imagine Kevin's sanity, just barely hanging on by the thinnest of threads after the deep dive into the Old Mill's history as an... ahem, "intimate spot", completely collapsed in on itself the moment he realized the Kennywood sign was a walkaround meet and greet character.
"The walls were splattered with fluorescent material and was totally done by Halloween productions during the refurbishment and not due to 103 years of bad aim..."
*MY SIDES*
Wow that went over my head until I read your comment LOL
@@shaunawright That’s what SHE said.
Wow! Looks like a Jackson Pollock painting in here!
Can I have a time stamp
@@razzamatrazz34 18:05
“Garfield knows all of our sins”
The way you said that in the most disappointed tone is what I needed today.
8:55 oh god. THE CUPS! Those have fucking lead and cadmium paint on them LMFAO, czcams.com/users/clipUgkx9C1Qfz3_ApYdNWXXDpwYuWO9mULzbJqT here's a hilarious clip from a jschlatt video about it
It's a phrase I've heard before, but not in the context of this activity -- -I think.- . . . Although [redact] I can't remember if that was the awkward (chain of) non-sequitur(s) near to the end of my last visit to OntarioPlace.
and then the next line is "perhaps the biggest sin" when talking about maintenance
The dry, cutting humor of this channel is so good. The first time I heard “a lot of you were gay in the garfield dark ride” I laughed till I cried
@@dizzylizzy940 so true, I fucking love how he can say the most batshit crazy stuff like "wiggles lore" in the same tone as a depressed cashier 😂
11:00
Citizens: “we don’t want Garfield!”
Jim Davis: L + no lasagna + coap
It’s comically on-brand for Jim Davis to impart the absolute bare minimum of effort necessary towards the Garfield park theming.
When you mentioned the scene where Liz is shooting air from a syringe, I paused and said, “it shot water! I rode it a hundred times I know it shot water.” Imagine my disgust realizing the water sprayed on my face was not only an error, but from the ride river filled with unknown bodily fluids. Loved the ride though.
I swear the syringe mustve had to shoot water initially and when it broke it wouldve shot out air that was propellent for said water
I heard if you drop bleech into the water it will combust
Especially concerning when you think about "103 years of bad aim".
...dare I bring up the email about the people who'd do their #2 business into the ride's river.
I AM SO SORRY.
Why would you remind me about the water 😭
I've always been upset that I missed out on this one!!
Do you just materialize whenever somebody says Garfield?
Bet he does
well i guess you could make your own review video thanks to the magic of POV videos
Saw this video and thought "I wonder if quinton will be in the comments" was not disappointed
The Garfield GOAT
fun fact: Rick Sebak(he made a documentary on Kennywood that is used multiple times in this video and is actually the guy at 5:50) is my great uncle! He's made quite a few documentaries and is kinda famous in Pittsburg. I'm in another one of his docs as a baby. Great guy
That story about that young man being able to safely kiss his boyfriend for the first time... gosh it moved me
“Garfield knows all of our sins”. As a Pittsburgh born and raised child who sent you an email about my experience in those neon halls(not too graphic I hope). No truer worlds have ever been said.
It's this ride the reason why everyone says "mods are gay"?
Was your experience romantic in nature? 🤣
spill!
I'm glad that Defunctland tributed Lasagna Cat for this episode by having its own version of the phone poll, somewhat accidentally
@@nathaniellindner313 Lasagna Cat is a magnificent work of art.
That pause on the Garfield urinals - juuuuuust long enough for it to sink in that, yes, men were meant to piss in Garfield’s mouth, is one of the many reasons I love this channel.
Right up there with “…already California-themed California.” I’ll never forget that winner.
so many fantastic quotes in this one,, defunctland has always had sneaky humour in it but this is the funniest episode imo
The "poor aim" comment about the paint splashes did it for me.
Poor Kenny the Kangaroo had me dying
czcams.com/video/LWdkDSPUTrY/video.html
This one feels like it snuck out of early season 1 Defunctland with its humor and I’ve never been happier
I remember being in middle school renting garfield books from the library and reading every single one that they had, and then the librarian buying a few we didnt have just for me. I can't remember her name now, but I hope shes doing really well. She was awesome.
The pain of being too old to have been conceived on the Garfield ride but too young to have done the deed on the Garfield ride
A moment of silence for Kenny the Kangaroo for not being able to fit into the boat.
poor chum
“A lot of you were gay on the Garfield dark ride”
That’s honestly the best thing I could’ve heard today.
Garfield saw things on that ride
The cackle I let out cannot be replicated by another human voice, it killed me and then immediately brought be back
Garfield is a true ally
What's the timestamp? I'm listening to this while I'm studying so I might have missed out
SHDHDJD ok 33:50 it's at the end my bad
I was so hyped for this ride to come out when I was a kid because there were flyers posted in my elementary school advertising the new Garfield ride. I went there the month it opened, so excited to see how they made the fun spooky boat ride a fun spooky Garfield boat ride.
It was probably the first core memory I have of being disappointed.
its been years since i've been to kennywood, but i grew up going there in the summers. i was so sad to hear they got rid of the garf. this video was weirdly nostalgic for me and also made me realize how much of a core memory that ride was
There's just something so fitting about a Garfield-themed attraction that was explicitly designed to be mediocre, was met with derision and mockery from parkgoers, yet managed to stick around for a good 16 years despite that.
Going from the video it seems like even if nothing else it was trippy good eye candy.
That’s the power of The Garf
@@urganodevotaton It was not even that, trust me.
Yeah it's crazy just how on brand it is.
We tried. SO HARD. to get Kennywood management to remove it. Nearly EVERY facebook post of theirs, even if it was something about the food, there would be a slew of comments "Bring back the Old Mill!" "Get rid of Garfield!!" One time, they posted about the ride and we just slammed them with requests/hate/whatever. They knew for those 16 years how much we despised that ride.
I like how this episode is less about Garfield's Nightmare and more about the 100 year history of people making out at the Old Mill.
Also thanks Kevin you are a trooper for going there.
What else would Garfield have nightmares about? Lack of lasagna? Mondays? Ludicrous.
@@Actiondanny There's a relatively famous run of strips about Garfield having an existential crisis. Not to mention some of the bizarre segments of Garfield: His Nine Lives. It's not a surprise that people have always associated the lazy feline with horror. The modern age has taken it to the next level and beyond, but it was always there, weirdly enough. Even the Halloween episode from the '80s gets kind of creepy in the last third.
It's so surreal listening to Kevin say things like "Monongahela" because we're so heavily overlooked here. I grew up riding Garfield's Nightmare. I was a kid, so I loved it. My favorite parts were the fish and the needle. I felt sad seeing the ride get more broken with each go but it was still fun because it was the easiest ride to get on. Me and other kids would rock the boat around and make a bunch of noise, or try to touch the walls and props. I remember my mom always complaining about the ride being awful but that never stopped me from wanting to ride it again. Although, it is awkward now knowing what else was going on in there 😅
as a patron when this video was in the works (my money situation changed), I can tell you that I specifically made sure he said “Monongahela” correctly
@@nowionlywantatriumph Awesome!
I hope you didn't put your hands to your mouth after touching the walls...
@@Oscar97o We couldn't reach the walls, luckily lol
As a fan of Defunctland and an annual visitor of Kennywood since childhood, this hits very close to home. Garfield's nightmare was always the first ride we rode after arriving at Kennywood. It's super cool to learn more about it
You learned a little too much about it, eh?
This is why I love Defunctland videos, I click to learn about a Garfield ride, I learn about the history of picnics
as well as creepy guys in boats
You never know how it's going to start!
I never imagined there could be such a thing as a "history of picnics"
It's like hearing about the history of hiking or eating lunch
I'll be honest, I had no idea that people actually went at it like that in Tunnels of Love. I always thought that was just a bit of a joke.
We've all underestimated the eagerness of some people.
Except the weirdos who actually strip on dark rides, of course.
I guess it's teenagers who don't have a car. They have to makeout on rides and cinemas.
Not just tunnels of love either, haunted mansion employees at Disney have seen it 🤢
Seems I’ve found a fellow Ace.
@@Alkimodon EYYY fellow asexual here too :)
That joke (@ 18:07) about the paint splatters in the UV _definitely NOT_ "... being 103 years of bad aim."... Slayed me dead!!! 😂😢💀😇
So my partner’s family is from Pennsylvania, with many of his family members (including his mother) having worked at Kennywood during the summers when they were teenagers. Knowing this…I had to ask his mom how accurate the reputation of the ride was. We unfortunately got confirmation that indeed, the Old Mill was a place for people to make out and fool around. I’ve never seen my partner so embarrassed during a conversation with his mother, and it was fantastic.
If only they’d create a Garfield dark ride based on the “I’M SORRY JON” version of the characters. Nobody would be making out during that nightmare.
considering internet people, they would be making out infront of eldritch horrors
@@bitchassmoththing im aroace and even i would make out in front of the eldritch horrors
@@furiousmagician5912 "what if we kissed on the Gorefield dark ride 😳"
try me.
Jon, I told you I wanted my lasagne-
Absolutely devastating that the kangaroo couldn't fit on the dark ride. You could see the exact moment his optimism died
The pan over with the music and editing took me out
It's okay, he reclaimed the throne of the park with his sidekick, The Sign(TM).
In the end Kenny got the last laugh.
I was in a Kennywood print ad when I was 3 years old. I still have the ad, with my bald head eating a watermelon. That is all. Love this park!
If they had wanted to build a scary Garfield ride they had only to look at the Halloween graphic novel that was created. It would have been a blast, and I am sure most young people would have never have seen it.
"Fluorescent material, which was...not the result of 103 years of bad aim." KEVIN, WHY? Now every time I rewatch the series and think about how warm and fuzzy it is experiencing those nostalgic vibes with your smooth narration, that line is going to be sitting firmly in the back of my head.
Honestly, I'm glad he made a joke about bad aim in a "love tunnel," and I'm here for this juvenile humor. 👍
If the couple in the boat behind you _also_ have bad aim, that might not be the only thing stuck to the back of your head...
CUMSHOT
I'll be thinking of it every time I watch a video about any amusement park in general.
@@Kevin-jb2pv 😂😂
The uncomfortably long pause on the Garfield toilet at 10:26 is perfection.
i clicked on the time stamp, and was not disappointed. the way the song playing the background ended on beat as concept art for a garfield porcelain throne was shown… pure gold. i burst into laughter and starting coughing on it.
It's actually fucking hilarious how that one clip lasts for like, a second or two longer than it needs to. It's amazing
I know it was a joke, but I genuinely felt a shiver down my spine due to the sudden wave of childhood nostalgia when the Garfield and Friends credits music started playing at 9:27
Nice touch.
3:38 I love the dry humor here.
"The biggest change to the ride was when it BURNED TO THE GROUND."
as a pittsburgher and defunctland fan i am simultaneously proud and so very ashamed
Lol yeah
i feel the same way
HARD SAME. HAHAHAHAHA
Same bro
As an Eastonian (bout 2hrs north of Philly) I feel like no matter how different either end of our state is, at least you can always count on Pennsylvanians to be both rowdy and horny, no matter whether they get their coffee at Wawa or Sheetz lol
25:53 - Oh god, the email beginning with "I was maybe 14 years old, on the ride with my dad" during this section of the video gave me a heart attack.
same
Omg same!
Why? Were you expecting her to recount a traumatic event?
@@GammaSierra 14 years old alone with only you're father in a small boat is probably not how you should start the story of your first big romantic experience story in the old mill where you are alone in a boat cart in a pitch black river and a dark building where no one can really see what's happening
@@stanley8006 Im just being a smart ass. It's interesting that couples still messed around in the tunnels, despite knowing full well they are being put on film. Those tapes undoubtedly ended up in the hands of the park owner.
I would do almost anything to time travel back in time to ride each iteration of the Old Mill ride. Especially the old haunted one. No, not for nefarious reasons, but just to experience the ride itself lol.
Lol. I bet they are all lame and smell bad.
That being said- I would love to do this too! Kennywood History!
As a local myself and current employee of the park, I thank you for doing a video on this. It gave me much nostalgia.
"To ensure compliance, Kennywood had to film employees completely destroying the Garfield props"
The footage, Kevin! Show us the footage!
I want to see this what are are definitely completely scientific reasons
Get Quinton Reviews on the horn there’s more lost Garfield-related media that needs to be uncovered!
I want to see so I can *get* *footage* *of* *garfield* *getting* *smashed* *into* *peices* *with* *a* *hammer*
*and* *then* *turn* *it* *into* *a* *meme*
Here's an idea for a ride, a "tunnel of love" that has a dumb and overly suggestive name like "hot, wet and sloppy ride in the dark." There are fake security officers posted at the ride exit who are tasked with apprehending anyone engaging in "inappropriate behavior." Once or twice an hour there's a fake "arrest" where park employees or volunteers get handcuffed and dragged away while they're exiting the vehicle.
The ride itself is awful; the thermostat is cranked up and the humidity is super high. The decor is a surreal montage of the worst parts of adolescence - getting braces on your teeth, exaggerated amounts of acne, hair in unwanted places, constant reminders that you're being watched and judged at all times, and a soundtrack filled with unpleasant wet noises.
Basically, this ride is meant to be so awkward and unpleasant that only horny couples would want to ride it but the ride itself actively kills the mood.
Now, you may ask, how is a ride like this supposed to make any sort of profit? The answer is simple: I didn't think this idea through.
No no,,,, keep talking, I like where this is going
I think teenagers would just take this as a challenge.
@@Rockman9830 it’s a much better challenge then putting icyhot in between your legs 😭
Your sincerity is exquisite. Don't let your dreams be memes.
You frighten me, sir... However, I must say, you also intrigue me.
Just wanna thank Nate Begle for the incredibly good audio mixing, it was a delight to my ears!
Kevin sounds so excited about the prospect of meeting the kennywood sign!