I understand what you’re saying, but generally speaking, your partner shouldn’t hold cards against you. It’s a RELATIONSHIP. You’re two that mold into one. Why would you need to have any defenses when you’re working with someone who is on your side? The point of the relationship to begin with is to let down your defenses and be vulnerable with another.
Garbage Fries - That sounds lovely on a greeting card, but reality is much harsher. My intentions are not to ridicule here but you absolutely need to have resilience and defenses in place to protect your mental and emotional state where your partner is concerned. Take affairs for example. An affair is one of the most traumatic emotional experiences a human being can go through with a lot of experts saying only death of a spouse comes first. I was listening to a pod cast where an Iraqi war vet claimed he would go back to Iraq 100 times more than finding out again his wife cheated on him. That’s absolutely insane. No one should have that much control over you. The people that say that’s why you shouldn’t marry someone that would cheat, or say I would NEVER do that are the most susceptible to trauma. You’re creating your own reality. A hyper false-sense of security and trust in another human being that simply is not possible. People that don’t understand these things completely take the lazy way out and judge and dismiss. Lives are destroyed, children are hurt, all because of bullshit and not enough education and practicality.
Yes, I can go days without talking to ppl, days without seeing another person. If you can't be alone it's a weakness. I know ppl that have to have ppl around 24/7 cause they feel lonely. I enjoy very few ppl, but love being alone doing projects learning new things, some ppl just don't know that feeling of complete silence or time alone
It's a good quote but the full quote is: _Being alone is dangerous. It's addicting once you see how peaceful it is, you don't want to deal with people anymore_
@@srijoybhattacharya9241 Life is getting more and more impersonal and inorganic.This social animal thing is all a thing of the past. We now have families who live under the same roof and have no idea what is going on.
@@srijoybhattacharya9241 Everything evolves. That's an old motto for old times. I think many people like short periods if have to at being social but most are probably content with small circle. I think that's different Tham saying social as in you need to be out talking to random strangers all day everyday.
@Joey Shmoey aw well I'm always happy to help the disadvantaged. I just wanna say I think you're a big boy for being able to figure out how to comment - and you nearly spelt everything correctly too! The only way is up for you!
@Joey Shmoey for the sake of actually informing you now I've had my fun, this is the quote "all that is gold does not glitter, not all those who wander are lost, the old that is strong does not either, deep roots are not reached by the frost."
@Abhishek Tanwar would u like to tell about changes u feel..i m trying it for a year on and off max 45 days till..sometimes i get frustrated..how do i get it to 100 days atleast???
01undeniable since 2016 when I finished school I haven’t talked to ANYBODY I mean literally nobody except my brother like my phone is beyond dead. Trust me like the actual definition of being alone without friends for 3 years. You guys won’t understand till it happens.
@@acerabbit6031 that happened to me when I moved to a different state when I was like 17 untill I was 19 I had no friends but I met a girl and we started hanging out and now I'm friends with all of her friends and met a bunch of other people at work. You just have to get out more and try to meet people. I thought I was the only one and felt alone but there's probably millions of people in the same situation.
@@undeniable6763 Yeah dude I imagine there's tons of other people out there in the same situation. But it really sucks when u have nobody to talk to out in the world other than online and then they end up disappearing anyway. I really believe in the term "things will get better" I just gotta wait for it :)
Being alone is scarily seductive. The more you do it, the more you enjoy it and feel less compulsory to hang out with people and listen to small talk + gossip amongst other energy detractors
Tobi Wobi personally i don’t have social anxiety at all, i’m usually one of the loudest and funniest people in the group when i do go out. but yeah, gossip annoys me and feels like such a waste of time and i prefer being alone to meditate, heal, read books, and ascend my consciousness to bliss lol
I've been alone now for 5 years and some change. No relationship, no friends, nothing. I go to work, I work out I go home. I am learning myself and trying to calm my mind so that I can be a better person
Honestly bro, this is how my lifestyle is right now. Im not trying to be alone at all just because it seems cool and people want to join. I truly try to fit in and it just never works. I always seem out of place for some reason. This has been my whole life. Starting to be alone and talking less brings me at peace. I wish nothing but the best for you brother.
@@MrwarriorO honestly everyone is different brother I'm like that too just moving along with life and learning more and more I have friends but they're not like everyday stable one's being alone made me realise how blessed I am
@richard kaye in America rich people get a better form of care. If you didnt know. For instance i worked 84 hours a week in America and was literally paid 5 dollars and change an hour. As a "private contractor" i could not even afford basic health insurance/dental. AMERICA IS FUCKED.
You can be both so it makes no sense to separate them. According to the occasion you can easily switch to being an introvert. I don't believe in either cause I know plenty of people who act quiet around strangers but run their mouth around friends.
I can be both ....but i was more extrovert ....now iam full of this mad society ....these people are just distracting me ..... after a toxic relationship and bad friends ...i learn now with 28 to be a introvert .... to focus on my goals ...and being happ alone ..... never had the chance in my past !!!!
I ❤️ being alone, single, never married, no children. No divorce, no alimony, no drama, no child support, able to accomplish all of my lifetime goals. I don't have to worry about losing everything I have. I love the freedom.
@Christian get some hobbies and watch anime then you will never be bored because there's too many anime to watch you'll never run out I recommend: Hellsing ultimate Gantz Parasyte Attack on titan Seven deadly sins Fist of the north star Jojo's bizarre adventure 2012 Black lagoon Afro samurai Re:zero Juuni taisen Redline Trava fist planet Tailenders The animatrix Genius party Highschool dxd Akame ga kill
I've been spending more time alone the last couple of years. It's actually quite nice. Still talk to people and do things with people but it's really nice to live in peace.
@@abcxyz-py6uw yep. Everyone now adays is worried what other people are doing and what they have. Once you spend time alone you get to see what you have and appreciate it.
I helped a friend finish his basement a few years back. He was sort of a newlywed, had been married maybe 18 months or so...after we loaded some drywall into a trailer, he wanted to stop by a bar and have a drink. His wife called him and asked where he was and he said we were still at Home Depot getting materials. He looked so at peace and relaxed just being in that bar and enjoying his beer even though he had only been married for such a short period of time. That's really stuck in my mind since it happened and it fits into this conversation in the sense that most of us would like to have a partner but a lot of us would like to balance that time with our own time. Hard to have that conversation with the other person though because undoubtedly they will take it personally and not understand that you do not want to be with them 100% of the time. First world problems maybe.
That's why I never got married. I'm content with having beautiful relationships until I die. I hate our society and culture and that's why I'm not main stream. There's an infinite amount of ways to achieve happiness why have people allowed themselves to be so brainwashed to think there's only one?
@@mjohnson1741 Most people are shallow thinkers. They don't exert the mental energy to really think things through. If they did the world be unrecognizable.
I have met many women who hate the idea that their boyfriend or husband is away from them and is enjoying himself. In that scenario, I wouldn't have answered the phone. When I got home, I would tell her I wanted to hang out with my friend. It's not easy to create your own space, but, it's worth it.
I literally dread invites. I get resentful that I have to use my time to socialize with people I’m just not interested in. It makes me feel guilty actually, I just wish I could shake that feeling & just own who I truly am at my core. Society won’t seem to let me though. 😔
@@kima260society isn't keeping you tethered to guilt. You are. Which is good news because it means you can just stop feeling that way. Saying no to invitations is just fine. And you will find out who genuinely respects you the first time you say no to them. Boundaries reveal a lot.
Everyone is here commenting on how great we are with being alone, how we're not even lonely, yet here we all are writing to strangers on YT, hoping someone might like our comment or even reply...
Man, thats only one of possible interpretations of the fact. Some people write just to write and to express themeselves and dont give a fuck whether a stranger read this or not. The same way you can elaborate whether a person do a totoo to himself or to draw attention of others? No one knows this for sure :)))
The "do nothing method" really is great. I started three years ago. And back then i was totally owned and raped by "my" mind. Today, man... its so still. Now the thought is my slave. So thankfull.
After a very hard breakup and sleeping with other people afterwards to fill that hole, I eventually took a step back and Learned to enjoy being by myself and not relying on anyone for anything it's empowering. I could sit in a room all day not touch my phone, not caring what's going on in the world and it's blissful!
Same, in the middle of learning rn. Last relationship was a good one but we became codependent and called it quits. Been in the journey of self discovery and it’s been a b**ch
After being in a relationship for 14 years, I have now been alone for about 8. It’s weird that people don’t like being alone. I work a full-time job so I crave and treasure my alone time. I find when I am alone I have become super creative creating things like song lyrics without even trying. Also you really find out what you enjoy and like because no one is influencing you or telling you. It’s kind of sad but I see people that have never been alone, they went straight from living with parents, college roommates, etc. into marriage and then had kids. So their entire life revolves around reacting or doing what is needed to provide for and please others. They never really develop their own identity and are being influenced by others 24/7. I often have stuff that needs to get done on the weekends like anyone else but sometimes just have no plan days where I just wake up an am like what do I want to explore today. If you don’t have days like that alone you are truly missing out. Take care. 🙂
Currently deciding which grass is less brown... in an otherwise great relationship where I'm judged for spending my time the way I like to (video games) and guilted into participating in things I don't sign up for.
I've been a loner my entire life. I've always hated going to events where there is a lot of people. I feel crowded in and I have no interest in small talk. I have 3 really good friends that I keep in touch with, but I can go for months without wanting to be around anyone other than my wife and kids. Even then, I have to have alone time every day. Running helps a lot. I can go for really long runs, clear the head and come back refreshed. I get that our society thinks being quiet and living by myself is some sort of defect. I find people who are constantly talking really boring and intrusive.
@@ShahabAhmad1398 not at all. When you are introverted lots of people drain you. Especially superficial conversations. I would rather be by myself or have a good conversation with one person then listen to a group of people trying to one up each other. Next time you're around a group of people sit back and just observe. Most people are full of shit and not saying anything important. Waste of time. Ego driven people enjoy this.
That isn't introversion. I see A LOT of people mistaking unhealthy habits for introversion. If you are with your friends and you feel MORE alone, then they aren't your friends. I'm introverted too, but when I see my friends I have a great time, I just need more time by myself than most, I still see them once or twice a week though...
prajwal sharma I’ve got a lot of friends I still go out to hangout with them obviously I also have a big family im surrounded by I’m saying whenever I’m alone I got no issue with it. Master the art of loneliness
Small talk is great, most introverts who say that it’s “unnecessary” buts that’s just because they don’t like it. I love my friends but personally I just find an enjoyment being on my own, a certain freedom comes when it’s nothing but me and my brain
Love being alone. My partner doesn't understand it and thinks it's selfish or that I'm disaffectionate when the reality is I simply love having my moments alone to think, reflect and ask myself questions. My self awareness, overall awareness and objectivity have greatly increased in large part because of my love for being alone.
Paradox 420 ya thats if you become socially inept. He is saying be okay with being alone occasionally. He is not saying he alone in a blank room or stay in your hone for the rest of your life. We are social creatures, we need to socialize but becoming mentally okay with being alone you will only be stronger when in crowds
No. Alone as a do-nothing type of situation not isolating yourself and voluntary not taking to anyone. Try get a chair and just stare at the wall for 2-3 hours and you’ll see what they mean.
Other human beings have been the source of all of my stress, anxiety, insecurity, and every other negative experience I've had. Being alone is essential for my own well being. I saw my brother after years of no contact, and the first thing he opened his mouth to do was criticize and spread gossip. Felt nothing but negative emotions the whole time he was standing there. He left his phone number and I couldn't tell you the first 3 digits because I never even looked at it. Why would I call somebody like that? A lot of my alone time is spent thinking about past interactions like that and where those emotions stem from. They're all from people. It's the time alone where I've learned confidence, pride, focus, and perseverance. People try to rob you of those qualities, especially when you are not grounded in your identity yet. I can't really identify being alone with the stereotypical effects like depression and mental illness after my experiences with others. It's been the exact opposite.
Respectfully...i feel like this is one major thing people so so so get wrong and perhaps need to reflect on a bit more. "...other human beings have been the source of all of my stress, anxiety, insecurity, and every other negative experience I've had..." False. 100 percent of what you just said... and this is key to understanding much of what's wrong in our world currently anyway... Literally every emotional feeling you feel, or have ever felt about a person, thing, or situation ... has been generated by and withib your own body...nobody on the planet has any control whatsoever over what you allow or do not allow yourself to feel...even Think... this is a wildly common way of passing off responsibility of something we can and should be in control of, to someone else and then blaming them for "making us feel..." some way or another.... this is rubbish to the max...I, as a human being, despite whatever behaviors i may exhibit or not exhibit, bad or good or whatever they may be, am in No Way Responsible for how You allow yourself to feel in Regards to my behavior...nobody Makes You feel anything that you do not in some part in some way First have agreed to Let yourself feel. Imagine the implications of a world where, as these types suggest...all other people have absolute control over what i feel like and when i will feel it.... total horseshit.... and a very common and sly method of not ever having to learn enough proper self-discipline and control of one's own mind and thought patterns, and just go around blaming everyone else for "making us feel..." some way or other.....nah buddy, you're the only one with that power over your own shit...it is no one elses responsiblity on this Earth how You feel or dont feel.....get a fucking grip and take ownership of that which is your own creation.
I've been an introvert and loner my whole life for the most part, the reversal to this video is that for somone like me learning to be in a group of people and truly enjoy it is a superpower. I can be alone easy, but I would rather be around others. A solitary life is not a good life.
I agree. As long as the people are decent, it's a great experience to be with others. We are made for love and connection (of course, it doesn't have to be constant. Nothing wrong with time alone too.)
I have people freaking out all the time when I say I go out to dinner or movies by myself. Feels comfortable to me. I love traveling alone. Makes decision making much easier:)
My advice for anyone trying to be more happy and secure with themselves is to try these two things as an adult (safely w/ pandemic protocol etc) if you have not already: 1. Go to a restaurant and eat a meal by yourself 2. Go to a movie theater and see a film by yourself Don't bring your phone with you when you do either.
A lot of wait staff are not good at treating people when they come in alone lol I know from personal experience. Society is catered to couples and groups.
I've literally always been able to walk away from anyone...me being alone has never bothered me. It's always the shock in those I leave that tickles me ..they always think you're gonna actually put up with their bad behavior, lies, manipulation, disrespect..then I leave them alone and they are stunned! And I mean stunned.
My cousins thought I was weird that I preferred being alone in the dark looking out at the stars than being outside sitting with people. I like being with people but I prefer being alone listening to my random thoughts if you listen to your mind you will enjoy it more than any conversation ever. I don't meditate I just sit or lie down and it happens. I think this is what made me stronger to go through war, leaving home and family, seeing death, hearing bombs, lost Education and no clear future never affected me I'm not depressed I'm happy.
I'm 37 years old. Single. No kids. No pets. Boring office job. I live alone. I have one friend who I see once a month. I get lonely all the time and I feel like a loser. Feeling alone in a world with 8 billion people is a strange reality. This is life. If you're young and you're reading this, don't be like me. Keep pushing for the best in your life. Ask that girl out. Apply to that interesting job. Do it.
I've been single for 11 year's and they have been the most peaceful years of my life! I didn't want to be single but once it happened and as time went by I realized how at peace I was!
I love solitude! I never want a huge friend group, that’s just way too stressful. Just 2-4 good friends and I’ll be good. Honestly when your own happiness and well being comes from you rather than others, your better equipped for life in general.
No im the same way! Im not depressed or a bad person. I just literally prefer to be alone. I dont want ti speak with anyone or conerse whatsoever just alone
Yeah, cause that's your PREFERENCE. You have the OPTION to not be alone. The people who are depressed are that way because being alone is being forced on them.
@@FLdancer00 my preferance is simply not being around peoples company i dont enjoy. If theres any bad trait about them i dont wanna be apart if it. Being alone is not forced. Thats like saying because your mind is in such a bad state your incabable of reaching out to people for help. And you cant respond and say no one will help because thats bs. Being alone is always an option. depressed or not.
Its proven the mind is always working, always thinking. To be in a room without light or sound is terrifying to most people. Being still is the first step to knowing God.
I'm turning 40 in a few weeks. I've been alone for years and I've reached the stage where I'm OK with it. I have nothing against relationships or kids but I'm not going to be one of those men who just get married because they hate being alone. Other people seem to have a real problem with how I live and constantly give be grief over it. Jibes about being single because "I can't get a girlfriend". Then I look at them and think how happy I am that I'm not like them. Most of them aren't even happy in their relationships but just can't handle looking after themselves. I pity them, sometimes.
Sometimes being alone is great. I spent most of my teen years alone and that gave me the freedom I thought I needed but I grew to hate that feeling of “freedom “. At first it was nice, I gamed all the time and I played the guitar freely and I tried singing dancing by myself etc. But spending all that time alone gets depressing after a few years. I can no longer enjoy being alone if it lasts for more than 2 days. I want to be surrounded by people I care about. I want communication and acceptance. Listening to my own thoughts all day and night can get weary.
@@sayedalazam4228 I'm 22. Due to loss of a very loved family member when I was very young and due to us moving a lot of houses and me having to lose my friends every once in two years for that, I have developed the fear of abandonment. It feels like whenever I meet someone and make friends they are going to abandon me or I'm going to have to abandon them after moving again or something. In order to protect myself from getting hurt from losing people from my life, I subconsciously push them away before letting them too much in my life and can't maintain long and deep friendships anymore. I know the problem but don't know how to fix it unfortunately.
@@MCrystalMaidenn dude...we're the same age in the saaaame situation. Holy crap bro, my man go make friends RIGHT NOW at your school or work trust me while we're still young! I've met tons of dudes in their 30s that dont have friends...and let me tell ya they look like sh#t! I'd rather commit...
It’s all about balance. Hanging out with people you enjoy being around is extremely important to happiness, but people who can’t spend a day alone without feeling lonely will struggle to be independent leaders and reach their potential.
I spent a lot of time alone , in isolated situations, it was hard but I learnt a lot and it made me realise that all this social media and all the noise is meaningless
Being alone can be a blessing. A lot of friends on Facebook post quite a bit about how being lonely tears them up inside. People need to learn about being alone, especially with the fact that so many nowadays are so fickle and will just use you up for everything you're worth.
in the end, what's right is right, what's necessary shall be done, and the reality yes we cannot escape from it, the more we try something like that, the miserably we'll fail... I don't know why I typed that, but I felt like it was the right thing...
Right now I live alone AND work from home. At times I love it - at times it's difficult. Being comfortable with yourself is a lifelong relationship - always evolving. But when you learn how to do it there is a certain peace that many people never have the privilege of knowing!
I have an awesome time when I'm alone. Doesn't mean I hate people, doesn't mean I have social anxiety (which I do, but mild and usually doesn't interfere much with my life), but trying to explain it to someone feels like an impossible task. I got many people I care deeply about, but sometimes I just enjoy being in my own company (and my cat's, too!) doing whatever hobby I enjoy. I am not a loner, I am just someone who gets along with himself and tries to make the best use of it. I lived alone for a year and a half back in hs without my parents or my sister and that was the time of my life when I was most productive, happy and relaxed. Just wanted to say this out loud as it seems impossible to express it to someone without them feeling like you're judging or insulting them.
I use to think it was cool to just be alone but truthfully I know that has caused me to pass up opportunity, relationships and what not but also I do agree if are able to be happy alone can't nobody stop you and your happiness isn't in anyone's hands so it's a double edged sword tbh
Being alone WITHOUT PHONE! I'm alone alot but if you're on your phone when you're alone it's a whole other thing then actually being alone...its not being alone
That is subjective. What do you mean by being with a phone. In my case, I read on my Kindle, listen to audiobooks on my phone, practice networking on my desktop and check the news on my iPad when I wake up. All this takes 3-4 hours. I have the rest of the day to myself asuming no one disturbs me. In fact I crave solitude. It helps my creative juices flow.
@D D Why do you think that that is too much stimulation? What do you mean by stimulation? For me, being open for 1/4th of the time and being introspective and thoughtful for the rest is the way to lead my life. If there is one fundamental that I have learned that I can relate to, it is the belief that people have subjective realities and that it is impossible for humans, atleast with the tools (internal and external) that we currently possess to know the objective truth. For many, Truth is an ideal of reason. According to Kant, happiness is an ideal of the imagination not of reason. Thus there is a direct contradiction. The happy person is the one who 'accepts' that truth as being subjective and lives life on his terms, values, desires and goals. He commits to his own purpose. If there were God or a being of similar nature, believing that we are even close to him in almost any context or that we can be like him, would eventually lead to an existential crisis. Rather, we must believe that we are our own Gods, which is definitely dangerous but it holds a handsome reward in itself.
@D DThis is not a rhetoric but what makes you say that? How is over-stimulation linked to depression. For me, over-stimulation gives the person a false sense of being. They learn to negate their thoughts and live 'solely' based on the opinions of others. And when they realise that their existence was pointless, they become depressed and ensue a host of other mental disorders. I would gladly love to know your opinion(s) on this
Well, I don't meditate, not in the traditional sense anyways, but I've always loved alone time, but 4 years ago (as of July 4th) I knew it was time for a second major overhaul of who I am as a person. I stopped dating altogether, I cut off all friends except my 2 closest and I have spent thousands of hours alone in the last 4 years and I'll be honest, I've never been happier in my whole fucking life. I got plenty of time to evaluate myself, see what was still of use and what needed to go and what needed to come in. I spent so many hours, days, weeks, months and years playing with the switches in my brain and I have figured out how to be happy at all times no matter what. I'm not just talking out my ass either. In the last 3 months, my Grandpa was put in a nursing home and we could not see him at all. Just as we get news after 3 months that we can finally start making short visits, less than an hour after that news my Grandpa was rushed to the hospital, we couldn't see him still. He went back to the home for hospice care, by the time we FINALLY got permission to see him we were on our way there for the first time and we missed seeing him one more time by less than an hour. Also, month and a half to two months ago I realized the girl that I know I'm meant to be with forever, that I couldn't do it. Not because I didn't want to, but my gut told me that I either have to choose her, or the destiny God has laid out for me. Long story short I told her goodbye lol. I tried to be nice and she got mad so, I had to make the choice of making her hate me by being an asshole so that I could burn that bridge forever. That way I never have to think about it again so I did. My Grandpa passed away on July 1st, today is July 9th. We buried him less than a week ago. I still have never been happier. I miss him like crazy, he is my biggest hero and my favorite person, him and my God son. Still, I am happier than I've ever been. I learned over the last 4 years how to keep my mind and my emotions in check at all times. Both of these incidents I have accepted that that wad how God wanted things to be so I'm perfectly fine with it because I know, at least for me as I can't speak for others, God does not allow anything to happen to me that does not have an absolute purpose and a reason or reasons so I accept it and look forward to the future and my fate. I let myself let it out a couple times for both of them, and then I put it behind me and moved forward. I finally figured out, through the experience with that girl what happiness is in its truest and purest form. Happiness is nothing more than a state of mind. It's a way of life, a way at looking at things and a way of interpreting the events that take place daily in my life. That's it. That's why some people who have everything they could ever want are miserable and why some people who have nothing are happy as can be. It took a while forcing myself to first, ignore the things I would consider negative and I mean not speak it, not think about it, not even notice it anymore and second, recognizing good things out of those same situations. It really is a glass half empty or a glass half full mindset. My glass is always half full now. I have found ways to find and recognize only the positives in any and every situation. With that girl, I had so many mental breakthroughs during the time she was in my life. It was then that I discovered what happiness is. At first I was happier than I'd ever been because we were going to be together forever, now I'm happier than I have ever been that we aren't going to be together at all. In fact, it makes no difference to me whatsoever. I also realized the reason my gut is always right is because that's God's way of talking to me. I also came to realize that I have followed my gut my whole life. There have been some things my gut told me to do that caused problems in my life, but down the road I see those are some of the most important and profound things that have ever happened to me. Not the events themselves, but the chain reaction of circumstances that came from them. I no longer have any regrets at all about anything period. There were times in the past that I knew a girl I really liked wanted me to ask her out or take her home and I just didn't. For years I kicked myself in the ass for those times. There were a few of them. Now, I know why I didn't. My gut told me not to. Nothing else makes any sense of any of those times. Even at those moments I had no idea why I just passed them up, but I've realized that my gut told me to pass them up. Now, I'm so glad I did. I wouldn't be who I am right now if I had. Nothing against those girls I believe they would have worked out and had they, I never would've met the girl most recently ob my life and I wouldn't have had all these mental breakthroughs and I would be far far off course as far as my fate is concerned. At some point over the last year I asked God if he could just give me some kind sign to let me know I'm on the path he wants me on and that I'm right where I'm supposed to be and am doing what I'm supposed to be doing. I asked God to please make it a clear and definitive sign. Nothing that I have to interpret or wonder of it is or is not. About 20 minutes later I was stranding in line at a gas station and I usually just fuck around on my phone when I'm waiting, but for some reason I decided not to. I'm looking at the candy rack and I see sales tags and so on. I look down and there is a red square tag with a black circle on it and inside this circle in red letters, I shit you not, all that tag said at all was, "This Is A Sign." that was it. Nothing else on it. It served no purpose as far as selling shit goes. I've been to that Gass station many times before and after that day and I have never seen that tag again. NEVER. I just looked up, smiled and said thank you God. That's all I needed to know. I have this feeling in my gut and have hadost of my life. I call it the feeling of fate. It went away for about 6 years starting about 10 years ago. After 6 years of me trying to force life to happen and do what I want, I finally gave up, handed the reigns to God and said I am no longer an active participant my life. I am merely a spectator watching an incredible 3D movie unfold in front of my eyes. I have gotten to the point where I don't even want to know what it is I'm supposed to do in life. I told God I'm just gonna wing it from here on based on my gut feelings and surprise me. He has. Oh He has its been a remarkable ride so far and ever since I gave up control I have been steadily getting happier and happier. If you aren't happy with life, don't do what I did and assume it's everyone else who's the problem. Look inside yourself and figure out who you really are and roll with it and fuck what people say or think. One of the greatest things God has done for me was at 18 he finally showed me how to not give a fuck what anyone thinks aboute and just be me. Now in almost 39 and that has changed my life forever. Figure out who you are, take all the blame and realize that if you want your world to change, the only way it will happen is if you change yourself. Good luck and God bless.
If you incessantly think, slow it down by talking to yourself like two people talking. Ask, "why are you really afraid?" "Why are you thinking specifically of that?" And answer your questions honestly. Sometimes things need to be slowed down in order to analyze it properly.
I do an hour and a half everyday and I celebrate the positive affect this has had on my life. I love the title of this talk! I used to freak out if I was ever alone, now some of the deepest experiences of love I have are when I'm alone! Really like this clip. Thank you!!!
Same, my thoughts are so clear in text and writing but when you put a person infront of me and we're staring at each other I can't articulate myself properly and it's exhausting to go through lol. People often speak and say very little anyways and so chit chat just feels like a waste of my time.
Master Roshi That’s exactly how I feel! I can’t explain better through writing things out than verbally saying them to pple. Then whenever I have company over I want them to leave shorty after they arrive because I too feel like the chit chat is a waste of time. 😅
@@xCeexus Part of my problem came from poor socializing as a child and I started to become an overly agreeable person because I thought that would make me likeable to people. I was wrong and so that resulted in me basically caring about others more than myself so then I was easily taken advantage of. I soon learned the difference between people and friends and I only knew people. As soon as I started treating myself like someone i'm in charge of taking care of I gave up on all that. People will use you until there's nothing left if you let them and being nice and trying to please people is a huge weakness where I live.
Being alone is a bliss. Even if you meet the ideal partner/friend, its achieve growth in your own time. Thinking and focusing on doing things without distractions.
Most of my life is spent alone now and I have no problem at all with it. It's very relaxing and there's no bullshit to deal with. Also, you are in complete control of everything, which is a great feeling.
I love how this guy knocks all of the wrong ideas of meditation and makes it known that anyone can do it you just have to deal with the unresolved issues you have
For the first time I feel someone just honestly and completely describes it to be nothing. I have always felt that meditation is about letting go, feeling nothing and just putting a blank space in your mind after everything has been resolved (like old emails). Whenever somebody says imagine this and imagine that it creates pressure for me. Then this becomes a training in imagination. Thank you Mr. Ravikant. ❤
I spent 5 nights in Iceland, completely alone, to film a personal passion project on solitude. Words can't even describe the experience. Too many of us don't know how to be alone nowadays! I'm now back in London and it's so hard to "disconnect".
Tell me about it. London is the epitome of a rat race. Everyone in constant competition. And the highest value is your bank account. It’s sad and harsh to say, but true.
I get there saying the rosary. The repetitive nature of it as well as my own mental thought process behind it being a spiritual moment really puts me at peace. Any time I am stressed or worried or just even feeling depressed, I sit in the sunlight with a giant glass of ice water, and I pray a rosary or two with my eyes closed and every single time I feel 200% better. I know not everyone is religious but if you are simple repetitive prayer is really helpful to ease the mind.
Being alone and being together, gathering energy and transmitting it, is like breathing in and out; if you are limited to enjoying only one of the two modes you are on the path to an unfulfilled life.
@@kevyxcx5829 That's what you don't understand. I know how to be alone; I'm good at it, it gives me many things that I need. I'm just not limited to it, I can do it all and enjoy the benefits of being together with people. That's not weakness lol.
You dont even understand basic sociology. Ever heard the phrase "there's strength in numbers?" Loners are not sTrOngEr... they're just more vulnerable.
Being happy alone is your ONLY defense in a relationship. If you're scared to be alone, your partner holds all the cards.
MickyAvStickyHands so true man, fuck its hard to do
I understand what you’re saying, but generally speaking, your partner shouldn’t hold cards against you. It’s a RELATIONSHIP. You’re two that mold into one. Why would you need to have any defenses when you’re working with someone who is on your side? The point of the relationship to begin with is to let down your defenses and be vulnerable with another.
Aptly said 👏
well said
Garbage Fries - That sounds lovely on a greeting card, but reality is much harsher. My intentions are not to ridicule here but you absolutely need to have resilience and defenses in place to protect your mental and emotional state where your partner is concerned. Take affairs for example. An affair is one of the most traumatic emotional experiences a human being can go through with a lot of experts saying only death of a spouse comes first. I was listening to a pod cast where an Iraqi war vet claimed he would go back to Iraq 100 times more than finding out again his wife cheated on him. That’s absolutely insane. No one should have that much control over you. The people that say that’s why you shouldn’t marry someone that would cheat, or say I would NEVER do that are the most susceptible to trauma. You’re creating your own reality. A hyper false-sense of security and trust in another human being that simply is not possible. People that don’t understand these things completely take the lazy way out and judge and dismiss. Lives are destroyed, children are hurt, all because of bullshit and not enough education and practicality.
Try going for a walk when everyone is sleeping. Between 2-4 am. The best time to talk to the universe. Trust me it will hear you.
jaysage what an amazing idea. Thank you. 🙏
I did this and got mugged. Thanks
Thats God
Yeah because yo ass is sleep deprived
@@jvillzy hahaha hell yea o that was you i saw outside my window getting stomped out by some dude with timberlands on
Once you realize what humans are really like, loneliness feels like a luxury
Most of them are stupid in their own way😂😂.
I agree🙃😊🙃
loneliness is a negative feeling, it's the state of being alone that brings happiness
I know what you were trying to say though ;-;
Yes, I can go days without talking to ppl, days without seeing another person. If you can't be alone it's a weakness. I know ppl that have to have ppl around 24/7 cause they feel lonely. I enjoy very few ppl, but love being alone doing projects learning new things, some ppl just don't know that feeling of complete silence or time alone
Edgy
“Being alone is dangerous because once you realise how peaceful it is you never want to talk to anyone again” - Tom Hardy
It's a good quote but the full quote is:
_Being alone is dangerous. It's addicting once you see how peaceful it is, you don't want to deal with people anymore_
We need people to have a healthy life, we are social animals.
@@srijoybhattacharya9241 Life is getting more and more impersonal and inorganic.This social animal thing is all a thing of the past. We now have families who live under the same roof and have no idea what is going on.
@@rameshrnayak very true.
@@srijoybhattacharya9241 Everything evolves. That's an old motto for old times. I think many people like short periods if have to at being social but most are probably content with small circle. I think that's different Tham saying social as in you need to be out talking to random strangers all day everyday.
"If you're terrified of being alone, you're in bad company"
Sadhguru!!
That’s deep
Sadhguru 🙏
What if youre alone all the time..you have nobody in your life...too much alone time can be really bad for you too. Its about a balance.
@@365daysgone i believe the same thing
“Not all those who wander are lost."-J.R.R Tolkien
Basically saying.....Not all who are alone, are lonely.
That is a false quote.
@Joey Shmoey aw well I'm always happy to help the disadvantaged. I just wanna say I think you're a big boy for being able to figure out how to comment - and you nearly spelt everything correctly too! The only way is up for you!
@Joey Shmoey for the sake of actually informing you now I've had my fun, this is the quote "all that is gold does not glitter, not all those who wander are lost, the old that is strong does not either, deep roots are not reached by the frost."
Except for Jim. Jim is lost as fuck.
@@nathanmills335 I don't get it
"To live alone, one must be either a beast or a God." - Aristotle
Wasn’t that merlins owl?
He who dwells in the light is either a god or wild beast
Imma god
@Abhishek Tanwar how do you feel
@Abhishek Tanwar would u like to tell about changes u feel..i m trying it for a year on and off max 45 days till..sometimes i get frustrated..how do i get it to 100 days atleast???
If your an introvert like me going on a walk alone is just pure happiness like a self therapy. I love it.
No lie!
That and even a drive a lone
Yes yes
Not an introvert but still love it
It is
but society doesn't like quiet, aloof beings
I like being with friends but I can't spend the entire day with them i get really annoyed being around people all day lol
01undeniable same you took those words right out of my mind
01undeniable since 2016 when I finished school I haven’t talked to ANYBODY I mean literally nobody except my brother like my phone is beyond dead. Trust me like the actual definition of being alone without friends for 3 years. You guys won’t understand till it happens.
@@acerabbit6031 that happened to me when I moved to a different state when I was like 17 untill I was 19 I had no friends but I met a girl and we started hanging out and now I'm friends with all of her friends and met a bunch of other people at work. You just have to get out more and try to meet people. I thought I was the only one and felt alone but there's probably millions of people in the same situation.
You might be an introvert.
@@undeniable6763 Yeah dude I imagine there's tons of other people out there in the same situation. But it really sucks when u have nobody to talk to out in the world other than online and then they end up disappearing anyway. I really believe in the term "things will get better" I just gotta wait for it :)
Being alone is scarily seductive. The more you do it, the more you enjoy it and feel less compulsory to hang out with people and listen to small talk + gossip amongst other energy detractors
Yup 😘
Tobi Wobi personally i don’t have social anxiety at all, i’m usually one of the loudest and funniest people in the group when i do go out. but yeah, gossip annoys me and feels like such a waste of time and i prefer being alone to meditate, heal, read books, and ascend my consciousness to bliss lol
Have you just passed your early 30s by any chance?
@@babygorl9541 I can defo relate
Tobi Wobi Or he’s just an introvert.
Being alone is utter joy. There are more hobbies, passions, and interests then I could ever fit into ten lifetimes.
Requires alot of money though. They seem to be getting "costly" each passing day lol.
@@faiqcreates still cheaper than having a family.
@@dtmyco1044 that is true
Alex - so true - yes!!!
Like what ? Give examples please
I've been alone now for 5 years and some change. No relationship, no friends, nothing. I go to work, I work out I go home. I am learning myself and trying to calm my mind so that I can be a better person
Honestly bro, this is how my lifestyle is right now. Im not trying to be alone at all just because it seems cool and people want to join. I truly try to fit in and it just never works. I always seem out of place for some reason. This has been my whole life. Starting to be alone and talking less brings me at peace. I wish nothing but the best for you brother.
@@MrwarriorO honestly everyone is different brother I'm like that too just moving along with life and learning more and more I have friends but they're not like everyday stable one's being alone made me realise how blessed I am
@@raihantahmid7272 🙌🏾🧘🏾♂️
Exact same way bro , happiest when alone , god bless
2 years now , no nothing 👍🏾
*Well I have no friends so this super power came pretty natural to me lol*
and I bet you are one of the most interesting people one could ever meet.
Ok
Dude I’ll be your friend, unless you’re weird
whhattt.. we been friend friends bro!! :D
Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh some ppl are just lucky lol
Imagine sitting in the lobby at the rich ppl doctors office and seeing Joe Rogan meditate for 20 mins straight
Id be like o shit that’s joe and his trippin on dmt, then proceed to flash neon lights in his face
I’d try if I can see my reflection on that bald head
@Ricardo Ignacio prepare to get kicked in the nuts
@richard kaye in America rich people get a better form of care. If you didnt know. For instance i worked 84 hours a week in America and was literally paid 5 dollars and change an hour. As a "private contractor" i could not even afford basic health insurance/dental. AMERICA IS FUCKED.
@Phil Myass Um, no
Literally, I’m at a point in my life where being alone is better than being with most people
I recently got used to being alone which was very new to me and it has literally changed my perspective on everything. It’s such a spiritual feeling.
I smoked a cigarette today. I don't smoke. It was just my rebellion I guess. Nobody to say oh no! Don't. Lol. It's kind of nice.
Aw 🥰
When an extrovert finally understands what every introvert already knows
#FACTS
Ah the bold introvert. A rare find.
I’d disagree, there are a lot of extroverts that are very self aware and vice-versa there are introverts that aren’t.
You can be both so it makes no sense to separate them. According to the occasion you can easily switch to being an introvert.
I don't believe in either cause I know plenty of people who act quiet around strangers but run their mouth around friends.
I can be both ....but i was more extrovert ....now iam full of this mad society ....these people are just distracting me ..... after a toxic relationship and bad friends ...i learn now with 28 to be a introvert .... to focus on my goals ...and being happ alone ..... never had the chance in my past !!!!
‘ i dont hate people , i just hate being around them ‘
me too
Same! Especially when they are sucking your energy!
What was it Tommy Lee Jones said in a movie once.... something like "Individuals are fine. It's people that are the trouble".
Love from a distance!
I relate
Once you realize how peaceful it is being alone, you don’t want to deal with peoples bullshit anymore
I have said the same thing for years, bullshit is the key word.
I ❤️ being alone, single, never married, no children. No divorce, no alimony, no drama, no child support, able to accomplish all of my lifetime goals. I don't have to worry about losing everything I have. I love the freedom.
Going though those things taught me to love being alone. I had to learn from mistakes I guess.
@@BFRIZZLE909 I learnt that through my parents mistakes and growing up through them
Yap man 2022 is best thing to do is beonf alone that is powerfull for mind and conect to natural good
The problem is when you grow old you'd better hope you feel the same.
Yea I agree tenfold but this same sentiment won’t happen when your older.
if you cant stand being alone-you really don't like yourself
I like being alone, I just don't like being a virgin at the age of 26 haha
@Ginsung Thanks homie, appreciate the compliment :) where my fellow incels at? #IncelsUnite
@Christian get some hobbies and watch anime then you will never be bored because there's too many anime to watch you'll never run out
I recommend:
Hellsing ultimate
Gantz
Parasyte
Attack on titan
Seven deadly sins
Fist of the north star
Jojo's bizarre adventure 2012
Black lagoon
Afro samurai
Re:zero
Juuni taisen
Redline
Trava fist planet
Tailenders
The animatrix
Genius party
Highschool dxd
Akame ga kill
@Ginsung LMFAO fax
@Ginsung but at least you will die happy if you watch anime...totally worth it!
I've been spending more time alone the last couple of years. It's actually quite nice. Still talk to people and do things with people but it's really nice to live in peace.
Brando I agree
yes bro less people less drama
@@abcxyz-py6uw yep. Everyone now adays is worried what other people are doing and what they have. Once you spend time alone you get to see what you have and appreciate it.
Me too. I’m on Georgia O Keefe status.
G M so true
I helped a friend finish his basement a few years back. He was sort of a newlywed, had been married maybe 18 months or so...after we loaded some drywall into a trailer, he wanted to stop by a bar and have a drink. His wife called him and asked where he was and he said we were still at Home Depot getting materials. He looked so at peace and relaxed just being in that bar and enjoying his beer even though he had only been married for such a short period of time. That's really stuck in my mind since it happened and it fits into this conversation in the sense that most of us would like to have a partner but a lot of us would like to balance that time with our own time. Hard to have that conversation with the other person though because undoubtedly they will take it personally and not understand that you do not want to be with them 100% of the time. First world problems maybe.
Put a smile on my face, a healthy marriage in all ways 🙏🏻👌🏻
That's why I never got married. I'm content with having beautiful relationships until I die. I hate our society and culture and that's why I'm not main stream. There's an infinite amount of ways to achieve happiness why have people allowed themselves to be so brainwashed to think there's only one?
@@mjohnson1741 Most people are shallow thinkers. They don't exert the mental energy to really think things through. If they did the world be unrecognizable.
I have met many women who hate the idea that their boyfriend or husband is away from them and is enjoying himself. In that scenario, I wouldn't have answered the phone. When I got home, I would tell her I wanted to hang out with my friend. It's not easy to create your own space, but, it's worth it.
@@garrygrant2394 They would actually be terrified if they found out what so called elites think of regular people.
As an introvert that enjoys and needs his time to himself. I am glad other people are FINALLY starting to get it😊
being an introvert and a empath.
I genuinely enjoy being solitary.
@@suezworld i'm the same, I can go months without seeing someone and I can be fine with it.
I literally dread invites. I get resentful that I have to use my time to socialize with people I’m just not interested in. It makes me feel guilty actually, I just wish I could shake that feeling & just own who I truly am at my core. Society won’t seem to let me though. 😔
@@kima260society isn't keeping you tethered to guilt. You are. Which is good news because it means you can just stop feeling that way. Saying no to invitations is just fine. And you will find out who genuinely respects you the first time you say no to them. Boundaries reveal a lot.
Everyone is here commenting on how great we are with being alone, how we're not even lonely, yet here we all are writing to strangers on YT, hoping someone might like our comment or even reply...
Preach
Man, thats only one of possible interpretations of the fact. Some people write just to write and to express themeselves and dont give a fuck whether a stranger read this or not. The same way you can elaborate whether a person do a totoo to himself or to draw attention of others? No one knows this for sure :)))
The "do nothing method" really is great. I started three years ago. And back then i was totally owned and raped by "my" mind. Today, man... its so still. Now the thought is my slave.
So thankfull.
That was deep
I just comment too try to plug my channel. Haha
Being alone...
And being lonely...
Are two completely different states of mind 😎 ✌ ❤ 😎
That's so true i love being alone but am never lonely specially when you have God.
That English bloke nailed it.
@Seyvonn DeLivrus ....I'm in the best company when I'm alone. ..and if you have control of your mind then you should be too..😎
Yes yes
I've certainly been alone & lonely,but I also have been lonely for being alone...
After a very hard breakup and sleeping with other people afterwards to fill that hole, I eventually took a step back and Learned to enjoy being by myself and not relying on anyone for anything it's empowering. I could sit in a room all day not touch my phone, not caring what's going on in the world and it's blissful!
same here.
Any tips on how you achieved this?
@@moeedmajeed you've got to fill your hole..
@@rickymassey look
@@gabi2k16 hey
It's taken me 5 failed relationships but I've finally decided to learn how to be alone and happy
your story motivates me.
Yeah SumTimes its like....peace
How
Feel you ..same here
Same, in the middle of learning rn. Last relationship was a good one but we became codependent and called it quits. Been in the journey of self discovery and it’s been a b**ch
“Im alone... but im not lonely.”-Neil (HEAT)
Mike Petersen yeahhh!
I'm both but trying to work on it lol . Trying to be ok with my own company . One day at a time though as they say 😇
If he just had a legal job ;)
That scene resonated with me...what a great line.
Found another Mann fan! Nice!
I've mastered the art of doing nothing
2fac3 lmaoo same
Right!!
Congratulations
2fac3 that’s dangerous. Learn to love to be alone, while staying responsible and being productive for yourself.
@Gerald Jackson exactly
After being in a relationship for 14 years, I have now been alone for about 8. It’s weird that people don’t like being alone. I work a full-time job so I crave and treasure my alone time. I find when I am alone I have become super creative creating things like song lyrics without even trying. Also you really find out what you enjoy and like because no one is influencing you or telling you. It’s kind of sad but I see people that have never been alone, they went straight from living with parents, college roommates, etc. into marriage and then had kids. So their entire life revolves around reacting or doing what is needed to provide for and please others. They never really develop their own identity and are being influenced by others 24/7. I often have stuff that needs to get done on the weekends like anyone else but sometimes just have no plan days where I just wake up an am like what do I want to explore today. If you don’t have days like that alone you are truly missing out. Take care. 🙂
Currently deciding which grass is less brown... in an otherwise great relationship where I'm judged for spending my time the way I like to (video games) and guilted into participating in things I don't sign up for.
I've been a loner my entire life. I've always hated going to events where there is a lot of people. I feel crowded in and I have no interest in small talk. I have 3 really good friends that I keep in touch with, but I can go for months without wanting to be around anyone other than my wife and kids. Even then, I have to have alone time every day. Running helps a lot. I can go for really long runs, clear the head and come back refreshed. I get that our society thinks being quiet and living by myself is some sort of defect. I find people who are constantly talking really boring and intrusive.
You have a wife and children, you're definitely not a loner. A loner is someone on their own.
I can relate to some of this. Anyone who tries to shame you for that is an idiot. They do that,then wonder why we aren’t social 😂
That is what I was thinking@@charlottetaylor4471
I feel more alone when with people. Joys of being an introvert
True
That's low self worth not introversion
@@ShahabAhmad1398 not at all. When you are introverted lots of people drain you. Especially superficial conversations. I would rather be by myself or have a good conversation with one person then listen to a group of people trying to one up each other. Next time you're around a group of people sit back and just observe. Most people are full of shit and not saying anything important. Waste of time. Ego driven people enjoy this.
lonliness is not about how many people u are surrounded with, but how many people u can relate with.
That isn't introversion. I see A LOT of people mistaking unhealthy habits for introversion. If you are with your friends and you feel MORE alone, then they aren't your friends. I'm introverted too, but when I see my friends I have a great time, I just need more time by myself than most, I still see them once or twice a week though...
I’ve masted this! Hit the gym Alone work alone drive alone eat alone it’s simple just keep yourself company💯
@Adz K fuck you random citizen FUCK YOUUUUUU
If you are happy it's cool but some form of human interaction is good
prajwal sharma I’ve got a lot of friends I still go out to hangout with them obviously I also have a big family im surrounded by I’m saying whenever I’m alone I got no issue with it. Master the art of loneliness
@@jorgeguzman9592 nice
@Adz K nope
Not enough people understand this, self questioning and reflection is the only way to true understanding.
We’ve known this. Introverts stand up.
It's great being introverted. No unneccessary bs small talk lol
You think its bs because you dont like it. Because you are introverted.
@@blurrycolours3624 it is shallow though which is bs.
Small talk is great, most introverts who say that it’s “unnecessary” buts that’s just because they don’t like it. I love my friends but personally I just find an enjoyment being on my own, a certain freedom comes when it’s nothing but me and my brain
I meditate every night, before I go to sleep. I lay in bed, close my eyes and try to empty my brain.
Then I wake up 8 hours later.
next try to fall asleep with your mind awake thats where the real fun happens
Next try to empty your eyes and close your brain
AM3X So you didn’t get Alex Mendez eh, lol
Facts! I lived alone for 6 years, it was the best thing I could ever do for myself. I love being alone.
Love being alone. My partner doesn't understand it and thinks it's selfish or that I'm disaffectionate when the reality is I simply love having my moments alone to think, reflect and ask myself questions.
My self awareness, overall awareness and objectivity have greatly increased in large part because of my love for being alone.
Being alone too much can effect your social skills and really change the way you look at everyone
How? You mean you unlearn things?
@@capo-amg6755 yeah your social skills
Paradox 420 ya thats if you become socially inept. He is saying be okay with being alone occasionally. He is not saying he alone in a blank room or stay in your hone for the rest of your life. We are social creatures, we need to socialize but becoming mentally okay with being alone you will only be stronger when in crowds
Pedro Rodriguez I agree. I actually feel like it makes me so aware that I actually get exhausted after socializing.
No. Alone as a do-nothing type of situation not isolating yourself and voluntary not taking to anyone. Try get a chair and just stare at the wall for 2-3 hours and you’ll see what they mean.
Other human beings have been the source of all of my stress, anxiety, insecurity, and every other negative experience I've had. Being alone is essential for my own well being.
I saw my brother after years of no contact, and the first thing he opened his mouth to do was criticize and spread gossip. Felt nothing but negative emotions the whole time he was standing there. He left his phone number and I couldn't tell you the first 3 digits because I never even looked at it. Why would I call somebody like that? A lot of my alone time is spent thinking about past interactions like that and where those emotions stem from. They're all from people.
It's the time alone where I've learned confidence, pride, focus, and perseverance. People try to rob you of those qualities, especially when you are not grounded in your identity yet. I can't really identify being alone with the stereotypical effects like depression and mental illness after my experiences with others. It's been the exact opposite.
Facts
Agreed
Absolutely, humans destroy rather than build up others moreso than not!
Respectfully...i feel like this is one major thing people so so so get wrong and perhaps need to reflect on a bit more.
"...other human beings have been the source of all of my stress, anxiety, insecurity, and every other negative experience I've had..."
False. 100 percent of what you just said... and this is key to understanding much of what's wrong in our world currently anyway...
Literally every emotional feeling you feel, or have ever felt about a person, thing, or situation ... has been generated by and withib your own body...nobody on the planet has any control whatsoever over what you allow or do not allow yourself to feel...even Think... this is a wildly common way of passing off responsibility of something we can and should be in control of, to someone else and then blaming them for "making us feel..." some way or another.... this is rubbish to the max...I, as a human being, despite whatever behaviors i may exhibit or not exhibit, bad or good or whatever they may be, am in No Way Responsible for how You allow yourself to feel in Regards to my behavior...nobody Makes You feel anything that you do not in some part in some way First have agreed to Let yourself feel.
Imagine the implications of a world where, as these types suggest...all other people have absolute control over what i feel like and when i will feel it.... total horseshit.... and a very common and sly method of not ever having to learn enough proper self-discipline and control of one's own mind and thought patterns, and just go around blaming everyone else for "making us feel..." some way or other.....nah buddy, you're the only one with that power over your own shit...it is no one elses responsiblity on this Earth how You feel or dont feel.....get a fucking grip and take ownership of that which is your own creation.
@@fortwynt5607 u are the reason i hate people just let us have an opinion and stop trying to be right all the time
If I meditate, I fall asleep. I'm a frekin master at this.
Don't take any kind of support for ur back
"The super power of learning to be alone and enjoying".
Yep, I learned this when I was 12 and have been doing it at least twice a week.
I'm alone pretty much 80% and I love it!
"The fear of finding oneself alone.That is what they fear..so they never 'find' themselves at all"
One of the reason I love truck driving so much is cuz I'm alone all day. It's awesome lol
Seems like it could be great, especially if you are driving thru beautiful scenery, but being able to have people you enjoy is good too
I'm trying to get my CDL. And I'm looking forward to what you said about it too!
I’m glad to hear this, I’m about to start on my cdl!
@@ballzmahoney954 get it man, it will be rough your first year as your learning but soon it becomes as natural as driving a car. Then it's great!
@@ballzmahoney954 where do you get CDL? What kind of truck you going to drive? Which pays the most?
I was already comfortable being alone but since the pandemic I’m so used to it now. Humans are so adaptable
I've been an introvert and loner my whole life for the most part, the reversal to this video is that for somone like me learning to be in a group of people and truly enjoy it is a superpower. I can be alone easy, but I would rather be around others. A solitary life is not a good life.
Yes, it is.
I agree. As long as the people are decent, it's a great experience to be with others. We are made for love and connection (of course, it doesn't have to be constant. Nothing wrong with time alone too.)
Just have kids, you learn the value of being alone pretty fast.
David Murphy hahahahahahahha I miss being alone
@@ajohonly3721 Me too buddy....me too😂
Yup and you’ll be able to enjoy after the next 17-25 years
@@bryanbroacosta Wonderful eh?😂
Pretty extreme way to learn a lesson i reckon 😂😂
I have people freaking out all the time when I say I go out to dinner or movies by myself. Feels comfortable to me. I love traveling alone. Makes decision making much easier:)
My advice for anyone trying to be more happy and secure with themselves is to try these two things as an adult (safely w/ pandemic protocol etc) if you have not already:
1. Go to a restaurant and eat a meal by yourself
2. Go to a movie theater and see a film by yourself
Don't bring your phone with you when you do either.
Want to add one more try to go gym and workout without music.. I think silence is the best hype music for me..
I need my phone for gps lol
@ Trey Ruiz no...I just "think" u need it, I don't actually need it 😊 💪
*u think
A lot of wait staff are not good at treating people when they come in alone lol I know from personal experience. Society is catered to couples and groups.
I've literally always been able to walk away from anyone...me being alone has never bothered me. It's always the shock in those I leave that tickles me ..they always think you're gonna actually put up with their bad behavior, lies, manipulation, disrespect..then I leave them alone and they are stunned! And I mean stunned.
My cousins thought I was weird that I preferred being alone in the dark looking out at the stars than being outside sitting with people. I like being with people but I prefer being alone listening to my random thoughts if you listen to your mind you will enjoy it more than any conversation ever. I don't meditate I just sit or lie down and it happens. I think this is what made me stronger to go through war, leaving home and family, seeing death, hearing bombs, lost Education and no clear future never affected me I'm not depressed I'm happy.
Problem with learning to enjoy being alone is that you start to dislike having to spend time with anyone.
That's not really a problem.
I'm 37 years old. Single. No kids. No pets. Boring office job. I live alone. I have one friend who I see once a month. I get lonely all the time and I feel like a loser. Feeling alone in a world with 8 billion people is a strange reality. This is life. If you're young and you're reading this, don't be like me. Keep pushing for the best in your life. Ask that girl out. Apply to that interesting job. Do it.
Yeah too many men don't prioritize relationships until it's too late
I've been single for 11 year's and they have been the most peaceful years of my life! I didn't want to be single but once it happened and as time went by I realized how at peace I was!
"I was born alone, I will die alone, and between these two, I am alone day and night." - Zen Master (I forget which one)
Peace brother! The most valuable thing we can have. Don’t let anyone or anything distract you or take it from you. Enjoy your peace
this really helped me a lot right now ❤
I’ve never gone out with a friend EVER IN MY life. And when I did, I still felt alone
That's becuz they probarly not Ad the same level. Nowadays its all fake.
amen brother, i’m alone quite often but I am never lonely
I love solitude! I never want a huge friend group, that’s just way too stressful. Just 2-4 good friends and I’ll be good. Honestly when your own happiness and well being comes from you rather than others, your better equipped for life in general.
I literally prefer not being near any other human being at all times and I’m not depressed at all
No im the same way! Im not depressed or a bad person. I just literally prefer to be alone. I dont want ti speak with anyone or conerse whatsoever just alone
Yeah, cause that's your PREFERENCE. You have the OPTION to not be alone. The people who are depressed are that way because being alone is being forced on them.
@@FLdancer00 my preferance is simply not being around peoples company i dont enjoy. If theres any bad trait about them i dont wanna be apart if it. Being alone is not forced. Thats like saying because your mind is in such a bad state your incabable of reaching out to people for help. And you cant respond and say no one will help because thats bs. Being alone is always an option. depressed or not.
Same
SAME
I'm 61 and single my whole life. If you enjoy your own company, being alone is a whole lot better than being with the wrong person.
“If you think, you think. If you don’t think, you don’t think. Don’t put any effort into it or against it....” Love it! Takes the pressure off.
Its proven the mind is always working, always thinking. To be in a room without light or sound is terrifying to most people. Being still is the first step to knowing God.
The more people you know and have in your inner circle the more drama....I hate drama
Never thought about thoughts as emails. That's a really great analogy.
lol you typed anal. lolll
I'm turning 40 in a few weeks. I've been alone for years and I've reached the stage where I'm OK with it. I have nothing against relationships or kids but I'm not going to be one of those men who just get married because they hate being alone.
Other people seem to have a real problem with how I live and constantly give be grief over it. Jibes about being single because "I can't get a girlfriend". Then I look at them and think how happy I am that I'm not like them.
Most of them aren't even happy in their relationships but just can't handle looking after themselves. I pity them, sometimes.
Sometimes being alone is great. I spent most of my teen years alone and that gave me the freedom I thought I needed but I grew to hate that feeling of “freedom “. At first it was nice, I gamed all the time and I played the guitar freely and I tried singing dancing by myself etc. But spending all that time alone gets depressing after a few years. I can no longer enjoy being alone if it lasts for more than 2 days. I want to be surrounded by people I care about. I want communication and acceptance. Listening to my own thoughts all day and night can get weary.
How old are you if you dont mind me asking, have you made an effort to make more friends?
@@sayedalazam4228 I'm 22. Due to loss of a very loved family member when I was very young and due to us moving a lot of houses and me having to lose my friends every once in two years for that, I have developed the fear of abandonment. It feels like whenever I meet someone and make friends they are going to abandon me or I'm going to have to abandon them after moving again or something. In order to protect myself from getting hurt from losing people from my life, I subconsciously push them away before letting them too much in my life and can't maintain long and deep friendships anymore. I know the problem but don't know how to fix it unfortunately.
@@MCrystalMaidenn dude...we're the same age in the saaaame situation. Holy crap bro, my man go make friends RIGHT NOW at your school or work trust me while we're still young! I've met tons of dudes in their 30s that dont have friends...and let me tell ya they look like sh#t! I'd rather commit...
It’s all about balance. Hanging out with people you enjoy being around is extremely important to happiness, but people who can’t spend a day alone without feeling lonely will struggle to be independent leaders and reach their potential.
I love my solitude, so many X girlfriends would think something was wrong if I wanted to be alone. No woman, I'm just tired of listening to you.
I'm dealing with that now
She considers your solitude as the"other' woman lol.
Whenever I miss her I remind myself how tiring it was to listen to her
😂
Women do have a greater need to talk than men, but I think most women of today are neurotic and can't shut up or get off their phones at all..
I enjoy being alone. Solitude and silence is golden.
"Soldier for christ" punk religion follower. Religion is fake. There is no afterlife idiot.
Don Khan why are you mad
Don Khan seek help please! Seems like you’re a lost soul projecting your insecurities on others
I spent a lot of time alone , in isolated situations, it was hard but I learnt a lot and it made me realise that all this social media and all the noise is meaningless
Being alone can be a blessing. A lot of friends on Facebook post quite a bit about how being lonely tears them up inside. People need to learn about being alone, especially with the fact that so many nowadays are so fickle and will just use you up for everything you're worth.
Well said
"nothing, sometimes nothing is the hardest thing to do" - Tyrion Lannister
"You are my Kween" -Jon Snow
I notice when I’m alone and happy
I’m being myself
Then I leave the house for work and the world likes to tell you who you are lol 🤦♂️
so true
Had to learn to ignore the negativity
in the end, what's right is right, what's necessary shall be done, and the reality yes we cannot escape from it, the more we try something like that, the miserably we'll fail...
I don't know why I typed that, but I felt like it was the right thing...
My favorite time of day is when my wife goes to bed and my dog and i sit in silence for a couple hours.
Wow marriage sounds amazing 👏
@@sweetchief3548 Lol
Loneliness and being alone are two completely different feelings,if you can master the latter you have nailed life.
I'm about to turn my phone off.. And master the art of doing nothing.
Wish the best of luck 💪
When you stop searching, you find peace.
Man I really needed to hear this today 💔🙏🏻
The hikes I go on I do not not encounter not one person at least 10 miles from anything you would call a road. The peacefulness is amazing.
Right now I live alone AND work from home. At times I love it - at times it's difficult. Being comfortable with yourself is a lifelong relationship - always evolving. But when you learn how to do it there is a certain peace that many people never have the privilege of knowing!
I honestly love being alone cus no one can be on my vibe level
I have an awesome time when I'm alone. Doesn't mean I hate people, doesn't mean I have social anxiety (which I do, but mild and usually doesn't interfere much with my life), but trying to explain it to someone feels like an impossible task. I got many people I care deeply about, but sometimes I just enjoy being in my own company (and my cat's, too!) doing whatever hobby I enjoy. I am not a loner, I am just someone who gets along with himself and tries to make the best use of it. I lived alone for a year and a half back in hs without my parents or my sister and that was the time of my life when I was most productive, happy and relaxed. Just wanted to say this out loud as it seems impossible to express it to someone without them feeling like you're judging or insulting them.
I use to think it was cool to just be alone but truthfully I know that has caused me to pass up opportunity, relationships and what not but also I do agree if are able to be happy alone can't nobody stop you and your happiness isn't in anyone's hands so it's a double edged sword tbh
Agreed
I must have mastered the art of nothing in my teens. I've been doing nothing for 15 years
Ok
Ok
Ok
Ok
@Adz K let's report the comment lol
Being alone WITHOUT PHONE! I'm alone alot but if you're on your phone when you're alone it's a whole other thing then actually being alone...its not being alone
That is subjective. What do you mean by being with a phone. In my case, I read on my Kindle, listen to audiobooks on my phone, practice networking on my desktop and check the news on my iPad when I wake up. All this takes 3-4 hours. I have the rest of the day to myself asuming no one disturbs me. In fact I crave solitude. It helps my creative juices flow.
@D D Why do you think that that is too much stimulation? What do you mean by stimulation? For me, being open for 1/4th of the time and being introspective and thoughtful for the rest is the way to lead my life. If there is one fundamental that I have learned that I can relate to, it is the belief that people have subjective realities and that it is impossible for humans, atleast with the tools (internal and external) that we currently possess to know the objective truth. For many, Truth is an ideal of reason. According to Kant, happiness is an ideal of the imagination not of reason. Thus there is a direct contradiction. The happy person is the one who 'accepts' that truth as being subjective and lives life on his terms, values, desires and goals. He commits to his own purpose. If there were God or a being of similar nature, believing that we are even close to him in almost any context or that we can be like him, would eventually lead to an existential crisis. Rather, we must believe that we are our own Gods, which is definitely dangerous but it holds a handsome reward in itself.
With few exceptions, phones have become toys for the weak minded.
If you aren't old enough to remember the time before cell phones you won't understand how insane it has become.
@D DThis is not a rhetoric but what makes you say that? How is over-stimulation linked to depression. For me, over-stimulation gives the person a false sense of being. They learn to negate their thoughts and live 'solely' based on the opinions of others. And when they realise that their existence was pointless, they become depressed and ensue a host of other mental disorders.
I would gladly love to know your opinion(s) on this
Learning to be alone was a catalyst to getting in shape.
Well, I don't meditate, not in the traditional sense anyways, but I've always loved alone time, but 4 years ago (as of July 4th) I knew it was time for a second major overhaul of who I am as a person. I stopped dating altogether, I cut off all friends except my 2 closest and I have spent thousands of hours alone in the last 4 years and I'll be honest, I've never been happier in my whole fucking life. I got plenty of time to evaluate myself, see what was still of use and what needed to go and what needed to come in. I spent so many hours, days, weeks, months and years playing with the switches in my brain and I have figured out how to be happy at all times no matter what. I'm not just talking out my ass either. In the last 3 months, my Grandpa was put in a nursing home and we could not see him at all. Just as we get news after 3 months that we can finally start making short visits, less than an hour after that news my Grandpa was rushed to the hospital, we couldn't see him still. He went back to the home for hospice care, by the time we FINALLY got permission to see him we were on our way there for the first time and we missed seeing him one more time by less than an hour. Also, month and a half to two months ago I realized the girl that I know I'm meant to be with forever, that I couldn't do it. Not because I didn't want to, but my gut told me that I either have to choose her, or the destiny God has laid out for me. Long story short I told her goodbye lol. I tried to be nice and she got mad so, I had to make the choice of making her hate me by being an asshole so that I could burn that bridge forever. That way I never have to think about it again so I did. My Grandpa passed away on July 1st, today is July 9th. We buried him less than a week ago. I still have never been happier. I miss him like crazy, he is my biggest hero and my favorite person, him and my God son. Still, I am happier than I've ever been. I learned over the last 4 years how to keep my mind and my emotions in check at all times. Both of these incidents I have accepted that that wad how God wanted things to be so I'm perfectly fine with it because I know, at least for me as I can't speak for others, God does not allow anything to happen to me that does not have an absolute purpose and a reason or reasons so I accept it and look forward to the future and my fate. I let myself let it out a couple times for both of them, and then I put it behind me and moved forward. I finally figured out, through the experience with that girl what happiness is in its truest and purest form. Happiness is nothing more than a state of mind. It's a way of life, a way at looking at things and a way of interpreting the events that take place daily in my life. That's it. That's why some people who have everything they could ever want are miserable and why some people who have nothing are happy as can be. It took a while forcing myself to first, ignore the things I would consider negative and I mean not speak it, not think about it, not even notice it anymore and second, recognizing good things out of those same situations. It really is a glass half empty or a glass half full mindset. My glass is always half full now. I have found ways to find and recognize only the positives in any and every situation. With that girl, I had so many mental breakthroughs during the time she was in my life. It was then that I discovered what happiness is. At first I was happier than I'd ever been because we were going to be together forever, now I'm happier than I have ever been that we aren't going to be together at all. In fact, it makes no difference to me whatsoever. I also realized the reason my gut is always right is because that's God's way of talking to me. I also came to realize that I have followed my gut my whole life. There have been some things my gut told me to do that caused problems in my life, but down the road I see those are some of the most important and profound things that have ever happened to me. Not the events themselves, but the chain reaction of circumstances that came from them. I no longer have any regrets at all about anything period. There were times in the past that I knew a girl I really liked wanted me to ask her out or take her home and I just didn't. For years I kicked myself in the ass for those times. There were a few of them. Now, I know why I didn't. My gut told me not to. Nothing else makes any sense of any of those times. Even at those moments I had no idea why I just passed them up, but I've realized that my gut told me to pass them up. Now, I'm so glad I did. I wouldn't be who I am right now if I had. Nothing against those girls I believe they would have worked out and had they, I never would've met the girl most recently ob my life and I wouldn't have had all these mental breakthroughs and I would be far far off course as far as my fate is concerned. At some point over the last year I asked God if he could just give me some kind sign to let me know I'm on the path he wants me on and that I'm right where I'm supposed to be and am doing what I'm supposed to be doing. I asked God to please make it a clear and definitive sign. Nothing that I have to interpret or wonder of it is or is not. About 20 minutes later I was stranding in line at a gas station and I usually just fuck around on my phone when I'm waiting, but for some reason I decided not to. I'm looking at the candy rack and I see sales tags and so on. I look down and there is a red square tag with a black circle on it and inside this circle in red letters, I shit you not, all that tag said at all was, "This Is A Sign." that was it. Nothing else on it. It served no purpose as far as selling shit goes. I've been to that Gass station many times before and after that day and I have never seen that tag again. NEVER. I just looked up, smiled and said thank you God. That's all I needed to know. I have this feeling in my gut and have hadost of my life. I call it the feeling of fate. It went away for about 6 years starting about 10 years ago. After 6 years of me trying to force life to happen and do what I want, I finally gave up, handed the reigns to God and said I am no longer an active participant my life. I am merely a spectator watching an incredible 3D movie unfold in front of my eyes. I have gotten to the point where I don't even want to know what it is I'm supposed to do in life. I told God I'm just gonna wing it from here on based on my gut feelings and surprise me. He has. Oh He has its been a remarkable ride so far and ever since I gave up control I have been steadily getting happier and happier. If you aren't happy with life, don't do what I did and assume it's everyone else who's the problem. Look inside yourself and figure out who you really are and roll with it and fuck what people say or think. One of the greatest things God has done for me was at 18 he finally showed me how to not give a fuck what anyone thinks aboute and just be me. Now in almost 39 and that has changed my life forever. Figure out who you are, take all the blame and realize that if you want your world to change, the only way it will happen is if you change yourself. Good luck and God bless.
Thanks for sharing, that was wonderful! And i can relate on so many levels. We must never lose ourselves, ever.
Being miserable doesn't lead you to incessant thinking, incessant thinking leads to being miserable.
No it's vice versa , both feed off each other in a downward loop
If you incessantly think, slow it down by talking to yourself like two people talking. Ask, "why are you really afraid?" "Why are you thinking specifically of that?" And answer your questions honestly. Sometimes things need to be slowed down in order to analyze it properly.
I meditate alone every night when I cry myself to sleep.
bruh
Bruh
Bruh
bruh
Bruh
I do an hour and a half everyday and I celebrate the positive affect this has had on my life. I love the title of this talk! I used to freak out if I was ever alone, now some of the deepest experiences of love I have are when I'm alone! Really like this clip. Thank you!!!
I adore my alone time. I can go days without the desire to speak to another human.
I’m an introvert , so being alone for is easy and lovely for me 😌
Same, my thoughts are so clear in text and writing but when you put a person infront of me and we're staring at each other I can't articulate myself properly and it's exhausting to go through lol. People often speak and say very little anyways and so chit chat just feels like a waste of my time.
Master Roshi That’s exactly how I feel! I can’t explain better through writing things out than verbally saying them to pple. Then whenever I have company over I want them to leave shorty after they arrive because I too feel like the chit chat is a waste of time. 😅
@@xCeexus Part of my problem came from poor socializing as a child and I started to become an overly agreeable person because I thought that would make me likeable to people. I was wrong and so that resulted in me basically caring about others more than myself so then I was easily taken advantage of. I soon learned the difference between people and friends and I only knew people. As soon as I started treating myself like someone i'm in charge of taking care of I gave up on all that. People will use you until there's nothing left if you let them and being nice and trying to please people is a huge weakness where I live.
@@masterroshi6983 yes agree
Same!! I love it.
Being alone is a bliss. Even if you meet the ideal partner/friend, its achieve growth in your own time. Thinking and focusing on doing things without distractions.
Most of my life is spent alone now and I have no problem at all with it. It's very relaxing and there's no bullshit to deal with. Also, you are in complete control of everything, which is a great feeling.
I love how this guy knocks all of the wrong ideas of meditation and makes it known that anyone can do it you just have to deal with the unresolved issues you have
For the first time I feel someone just honestly and completely describes it to be nothing. I have always felt that meditation is about letting go, feeling nothing and just putting a blank space in your mind after everything has been resolved (like old emails).
Whenever somebody says imagine this and imagine that it creates pressure for me. Then this becomes a training in imagination.
Thank you Mr. Ravikant. ❤
I spent 5 nights in Iceland, completely alone, to film a personal passion project on solitude. Words can't even describe the experience.
Too many of us don't know how to be alone nowadays! I'm now back in London and it's so hard to "disconnect".
how was your trip to iceland? I'm going in 2 months or so! Excited for what's to come
Kelvin Chiu passion project he says
@@devynsingh9421 icelands great but go north out of rek and avoid the crowds / tourists.
Tell me about it. London is the epitome of a rat race. Everyone in constant competition. And the highest value is your bank account. It’s sad and harsh to say, but true.
I get there saying the rosary. The repetitive nature of it as well as my own mental thought process behind it being a spiritual moment really puts me at peace. Any time I am stressed or worried or just even feeling depressed, I sit in the sunlight with a giant glass of ice water, and I pray a rosary or two with my eyes closed and every single time I feel 200% better. I know not everyone is religious but if you are simple repetitive prayer is really helpful to ease the mind.
Being alone and being together, gathering energy and transmitting it, is like breathing in and out; if you are limited to enjoying only one of the two modes you are on the path to an unfulfilled life.
No, you’re basic. Loners are stronger than you.
@@kevyxcx5829 That's what you don't understand. I know how to be alone; I'm good at it, it gives me many things that I need. I'm just not limited to it, I can do it all and enjoy the benefits of being together with people. That's not weakness lol.
Low vibration ass bitch
You dont even understand basic sociology.
Ever heard the phrase "there's strength in numbers?" Loners are not sTrOngEr... they're just more vulnerable.