anorexia nervosa: how can you help? the do's and don'ts *from someone who's been there*
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- čas přidán 20. 07. 2021
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instagram: @roisinmitc ♥︎ / roisinmitc
food instagram: @rorecovering ☁︎ / rorecovering
depop: shoplittlerose
tiktok: rorecovering
please bare in mind this will not apply to every sufferer, and if you disagree with any of the things i stated then please let the person supporting you know what works for YOU. this is based off my own experience and those who follow me online.
BEAT: www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk
take care, i love u xxxx
thanks so much for all the kindness 🤎 next weeks video is a v exciting vlog style one :) just thought this could help, i love u all
Aww bless you. Thank you for making it, really looking forward to next week's vlog ❤️❤️❤️
This video is brilliant! I don't know anybody with an eating disorder personally, but I've been a HUGE supporter of you and what you're doing since I found you, and this video helped me in figuring out what to say to support you! I get nervous to say the wrong thing as well, because I wish you all the best, and I know that the most well-intentioned comment can be exactly the wrong thing to say! Thank you Ro... you have an absolutely beautiful heart, and you absolutely deserve all the goodness and success in the world! Cheering you on from the US! ❤💯
So sweet of you. You are amazing and don’t forget that. I don’t have an eating disorder but I find you so inspirational ❤️
One time I was extremely tempted to relapse on my anorexia and I told one of my friends. She took me to one of my favorite fast food places, if you can call noodles and co. Fast food, and she got the item on the menu with the most calories in it. I had no idea why in the world she wanted something with so many calories so I asked her. She said, “whenever I go out to eat with someone with an ED I always get the item with the most calories to help them know they don’t need to eat something with few calories. And then they won’t feel guilty with getting something with more calories.” This was such a relieving feeling for me that she did this. And helped me realize that calorie count does not define food or weight.
that's amazing
props to your friend! when i told my friends i kinda really struggle and stuff, they just distanced themselves.
@@kstadlerova I'm really sorry that! People that distant themselves when someone's struggles and stay only in the good moments. In my opinion they don't deserve to be called friends and generally everyone should feel like helping. Hope you're doing better and you feel welcomed
Wow
@@kstadlerova I’m so sorry to hear that! People like that don’t understand what it’s like to lose people when you need them. I hope you find people you can count on to be there for you.
Ro is so smart she's going to be an amazing psychologist/therapist/psychiatrist when she finishes uni. I hope she writes a book about this, very eloquent speaker.
Not telling people suffering with it "Just eat" would be a good start. I remember some of my close people kept saying that to me (they didn't have bad intentions) and it was very exhausting. This illness (for my case) pushes you to starve and even while trying to recover, it fills you up with guilt at every bite of food.
yeaaaah agreed, I mentioned that in this :)
Yeah the only time you should be saying Just Eat is when you are looking for a food ordering platform.
That 'just eat' comment really hit home with me. I've not suffered from an ED but I have suffered from insomnia and there was nothing more frustrating than people saying things like "have a bath", "meditate" etc. Nothing like that helps when you really are suffering with insomnia....like you say EDs are a mental disease and not many people realise that! You can't make yourself fall asleep when you brain will not let you. You can't force yourself to eat when your brain won't allow it. Thanks for helping me understand xx
I feel that, when I was recovering my dad said “don’t be a calorie counting nut” (those words exactly) and it rubbed me the wrong way…
@@jules6735 I'm really sorry about that. Sometimes parents can be a real pain and seriously feels like they're not even trying to understand sometimes. Hope you're doing better
Just because a person is physically better DOESNT mean their mentally better...i felt this in my soul 😢❤️ People need to know this! Especially mental heath professionals! 🖤
exactly! actually, the more i get better physically, the worse i get mentally and people are tellingme it´s impossible.
THIS!! I’m now at a healthy weight but I’m still recovering mentally!!
I have generally maintained a healthy weight so far throughout my recovery, but my brain has been screwed. Eating disorders are mental health problems, they’re not weight disorders.
It’d be so neat if you did a video with your mom discussing her involvement in your recovery and how she has supported you. She seems so gentle but also encouraging and consistent with her support. That was something I never had when going through recovery, but I can see how that sort of love and encouragement would be so comforting and helpful when you’re on that journey.
This!!!
Definitely one of the biggest things is to just LISTEN to how an ED sufferer is feeling, even if it doesn’t make sense. EDs don’t make sense. The best thing you can do is educate yourself and do your best to understand
I've struggled for 11 years and replased this year and this is my first week in recovery and I can't thank you enough for this video. I have shared this with my family because this will help not only myself but them too. ❤️
sending love and light your way 🤎
Not all heroes wear capes....you are going to be the BEST psychologist the world has seen Ro, absolutely rooting for you and your journey. You remind me why I choose recovery every single day xxxxx
i always thought i was faking my anorexia but oh my gosh this has helped me see that that’s not the case. i relate to this so much. thank you ro
Your illness is very much valid. I believe in you and that you got this ♥
Recovery is possible and anyone can achieve it
We all think we are faking. I believe it’s part of it.
I can relate too, my mind is always trying to make me believe that what my behavior is 'normal' but it's making me crazy
green is YOUR COLOUR ♥ you are shining like a star x
Also green is a color associated with HEALING, wich is beautiful in this context 💚
@@pssst.890 jajajajajajajajajajjaja por qué bardeaba!!!! a casa pete
@@pssst.890 I'm literally in my country, in my city where I was born. I guess it's too hard for your little brain to understand it 🥺 so sorry for u
I hope this gets translated for people with parents that don't speak English, it can be very helpful!
i’m going to try and sort translations out! :)
@@RoMitchell Hi! I speak Spanish and English, so I could translate this video if you wanted me to help you 😃
@@RoMitchell Hi :) love your videos! I‘m from Germany and would love to translate your video, if you‘d like some help
I also can help with translating as I speak Arabic! :D
I don’t have an ED, but I do struggle with OCD/guilt around diet and exercise and this was so kind, accurate and helpful. Thank you for putting this out in the world for those who have never dealt with disordered eating.
I’m currently a month and a half into recovery and I’m really struggling with weight gain right now. It’s so freaking scary to eat and I just feel so overwhelmed and guilty all the time. I’m so exhausted and so freaking tired of all of this…
I’m so proud of you for choosing to recover! also remember within your weight gain you’re also gaining your life back! I believe in you
thank you so SO MUCH for this, i’m definitely sending this to my parents as they refuse to listen to me when i try to explain and it doesn’t help that eds and mental health in general are extremely stigmatised in society especially amongst asians, so it’s harder for them to understand when diet culture is basically normalised and drilled into everyday talk
sending love & I hope it helps them understand xxxx
I've been had an ed for 2-3 years now and a few weeks ago I started to recover. Its been rough but you have helped me so much. It's so nice to listen to someone who cares and understands what you are going through. Love you ro
Literally proud of a stranger and it’s weird but I’m not complaining
As a person with a loved one with anorexia, I initially thought it was a strange mental illness that I would never relate to or understand. But the more conversations I have had with my loved one, the more I have realised that anorexia shares a lot of similarities with the depression I am suffering with myself. Both likely stem from feelings of low self worth. Both have periods of progression or regression. Some of the points you made are applicable to depression too:
- Don’t give up on them (of course)
- Be gentle and patient
- Acknowledge small victories
- Similar to “Just eat”, “Just do the thing” is not helpful and demonstrates a complete lack of understanding of the illness
- Similar to commenting on someone with anorexia’s body, “You seem happy today” is not a nice thing to hear and just reminds me that my default is to be depressed
- Don’t blame yourself as that guilt will pass on your loved one
These are certainly things I have tried to get through to well meaning family over the years. Anyway, I thought I would point this out as it may help people with either illness relate to each other a little better, like it did with myself and my loved one. Great and informative video!
I am not struggling with an ED but still wish that some of these rules would be applied in every day life... even if you have a (kind of) healthy relationship with food it can be so exhausting
Brilliantly made video, I'm a parent of a daughter suffering from anorexia nervosa. I have not always been kind to her when confronted with her problems, it's so difficult to know what to do to support her. Your video has some invaluable comments, thank you so much, I'm taking on board what you say. You are so succinct and get to the core of the illness without
waffle. I think I've been doing a few things that haven't been helpful, and one or two things you have suggested that are.
Thanks so much. As I said, thanks for listening and trying! Sending you both strength 🤎
tysm for this video i'm going to send this to my friends to help them understand as i've recently started recovery ily❤
you got this - I'm proud of you for starting xxxx
I just want to say I have been recently been admitted to hospital for my Ed and they have increased my food by so much ,so I have been struggling but watching your videos help me a lot when I’m eating ❤️
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Thank you, Ro! This video means so much!💕
you are so kind ro, you deserve everything🤎
u are truly amazing. so many people need to here this🤍
This was short, concise, and SO WILDLY helpful! Thanks dude
you’ve helped me so much in my recovery, whenever times get hard i always watch your videos
Ro you will do amazing helping others who have suffered just like you.
I love how the light and life is back in your eyes, you are very brave ❤️
Thank you so much for this Ro, you have no idea how much you have helped me in my recovery🥺 sending you all my love
Yay my fav and comfort youtuber uploaded I feel so motivated after watching you
You are helping so many people (including me and my parents) with this! Thank you so much!✨
u are incredible Ro, i appreciate u so much, sending hugs luv💓
You are litteraly my biggest motivation in my recovery thank you for everything 🥺❤🙏
Over 100k subscribers 🙌🙌🙌 CONGRATULATIONS, so well deserved x
Ro, you're honestly helping me through recovery right now- I wouldn't even have the motivation to even get through the day. You're videos are so informative too and I've found myself quoting the amazing takes you have on food/body related issues
hearing you speak in the past tense about your illness is just SOOO freaking fantastic, I'm so happy for you and your amazing journey! Keep on fighting - ofc I know you are still struggling but just know, that you are such an inspiration to so many of us ❤️💪🏼
YES 🥰🙌🙌
@@pssst.890 what makes you say that? how on earth could you fake such a thing? 😅
So much love for you and your channel Ro, you're doing a great thing and you've helped so many people just by doing what you do. Thank you for everything!!
It's crazy how far you've come and how helpful you and your videos are❣ I'm really looking up to you!
thank you so much Ro, Youve verbalised all the difficult thoughts and feelings I find so hard to process and now I feel so much less alone xxx
Thank you for making recovery content it reminds me that I have a purpose to get better and tends to remind me to eat on days I'm struggling.
I am so grateful for your content!!! You have helped me a ton with my recovery!!! 🥺💕🤌🏻
I’m honestly so proud of you!! You’ve come so far, you’re such an inspiration! I’ve started my recovery because of you🖤
honestly your so well spoken and know all the right things i sent this right over to family:) thank you xx
Spot on, Ro! I’m so thankful you made this video. I will definitely share it!
this video is honestly amazing, I'm really happy this exists because it is so terribly important. Thank you for this ;-; ,its actually incredibly considerate. love u ro.
So much respect for you. My recovery has taken about 5 years, and the fact that you've tackled it head on and have been so vocal about helping others is amazing. Keep up the incredible work 💙
thanks so much 🤎
I am much older than you yet I have learned so much about this disease that I have dealt with for most of my life, thanks Ro!!!
sending this to my closest friends and family members now❤️thank you for this video, it can be really hard to explain to others who don’t understand
i don't feel guilty anymore after I finished eating , ro you have a hugeee impact on my recovery journey I love you thank you
god im so thankful i found your channel im just over 2 months into recovery myself and i kid you not your videos have been a life saver!!! must of rewatched them all about 10 times😭😭thankyou for making this kinda content it’s so helpful, im proud of you❤️
Thankyou so much for this! It’s reaffirmed what I’m doing to support my friend is right and also what else I can do. Your channel had already helped me so much and I’m so proud of you x
Tysm for this video me being on recovery for the past 3 weeks has been a really hard challenge but thanks to you and your videos I find it a lot more easier
This is really beautiful. Thank you for sharing this, Ro.🌿✨
I love the aesthetic of this video with the little plants and the pillow and your shirt 💚
Every time I feel insecurity or lose motivation I think of you and continue the fight. So I just wanted to say: Thank you :3
This video is seriously so helpful Ro. It sums up the most important points of what a lot of people who are suffering struggle to put into words themselves. I know for myself I often get too emotional to express what I'm feeling and why. Thank you for explaining it so clearly!
I'm studying psychology and I also worked in a hospital with girls who had anorexia. And this helped so much!! In general your channel gives so much hope and I'm glad I came across it. I really feel for those girls and I want to make a difference, and your videos are really helpful. So proud of you and your journey!!
Love your videos Ro. Power, strength and connection to you in your recovery xx
Such a beautiful, kind soul! You are a rainbow in so many peoples’ cloud, including mine. Thank you for making this video.
I wish this video had existed a few years ago when I was in the depths of my anorexia. This video will help so so many people to support their friends and family, thank you for everything you do Ro x
Thank you so much, you have no idea how much I need this right now. I can not thank you enough❤️
I have literally never seen this kind, gorgeous, suportive and all the way amazing person
One of the reasons I love watching you is that you show such amazing courage. You are, every day, waging a war against the lies that your illness tells you, and you. Are. Winning.
💜 Victorious 💜
This is amazing! Soooo many good facts and amazing support here, you're so inspiring Ro ❤️
You're glowing today Ro, another great video as always x.
Looking forward to the next one!
Thank you so much for this! I'll be passing this on to friends and family so they can understand me better 🥰💙
oh Ro I really appreciate you and your channel so much. Thank you for all your videos
this is such a beautiful video :,) every time i have really bad days throughout recovery i turn on one of your videos. you word things perfectly. you have helped me more than you know.
This was the video I wished you would make, but felt it'd be not ok to ask. THANK YOU :)
In the beginning I have seen, you are stronger and smarter than ill. Good luck girl.
You’re amazing in every way. Thank you for this video
You are so helpful and inspirational. I just can't get enough of you. Its so comforting to hear someone talking about something that a lot of people don't really understand. Thank you Ro ❤️ you help a lot.
Xx
i'm going out to lunch with my friend who is in ED recovery so thank you for this awesome video! i hope the lunch goes well and i wish you a good recovery!
I appreciate your honesty, sincerity, and that you keep it real. I love your positive attitude. Thank you for sharing your journey. Keeping you in my prayers!!!
Absolutely incredible! Will be sharing with my friends and family, thank you Ro❤️❤️
sending this video to my parents in love and not in a mean way, just a hope that it educates them a little more to help me. Thank you Ro❤️
I am so glad you are doing well. It is good to see you. This is such a helpful video thank you.
This is amazing! Thank you so much ❤️🥺 I’ve already sent this to all of my family aha xxxx
Hi Ro,
I have been following you for a while now. I smile when I see you have posted something and and wait with anticipation to see if you are doing well. Is beautiful to see another human being going through their life journey with grace and courage.
You have touched my heart.
Big hugs from Australia
Ro you look gorgeous and your skin is glowing. I appreciate your honesty in your channel
Ro thank you so so much for being such a light in this world! You’re channel has been so helpful in my 4 months of recovery! I’m starting at a in patient clinic tomorrow and I’m terrified but I am really hoping to come out strong just like you are! I’m also definitely sharing this with my fam since it helps so so much! Keep up the amazing work my friend! You truly are incredible! I love and thank you so so much! 😘
HI I LOVE YOU!! i’m a month into anorexia recovery in 4 days - you’ve helped SO MUCH 🤍🤍
I am in training to become a psychologist and I just wanted to say that your videos are so beautiful. I find them insightful and so helpful in understanding the experience of eating disorders. The way you are taking recovery into your own hands is amazing and I am sure you are helping a lot of people. Good luck, you can do this!!!
Hi Ro, so lovely to see you!!! Been thinking about you and hoping you're ok. Great video idea, bless you. You're so helpful and caring ☺️💕
Great advice, spot on I would say. This is going to help so many people and I wish my family had been able to view a video like this during my recovery (and some "professionals")!!!!!!!!
The low self worth, the not deserving food, needing compassionate advice and understanding is all so so important!!!
Also not focusing on the sufferers body and the way they eat. So relevant. Omg and other people's diet culture chatter is sooo unhelpful!!!
This was probably a difficult video to make as is not your usual content, so kudos to you for making it!!
Loving the green theme going on with the cushion, plants, t shirt and jewelry! Makes for a very calm backdrop 😊
Take care lovely and remember how loved you are and how absolutely deserving of food you are 💯!!!
Your content is invaluable. You are so well spoken and provide really clear and strong support for everything you say. This was really thoughtfully done, can’t wait to watch your impact continue to unfold.💗
Thank you so much for this video, you’re truly stunning, and so brave for sharing your journey with so many people. Much love ❤️❤️
This is really brave! Proud of you!!!
You seem so much more confident than a few months ago already! It is beautiful to watch your journey, you are so strong!
For me, the biggest do is probably the acknowledging victories thing. I think people don't even know how much little phrases might help someone who's struggling :)
Just tuned in to see how gorgeous you look! You’ve come so far and should be so proud. You look happy, healthy, and strong. What an inspiration. Bravo 👏
Your words, advice and guidance in this video are true representations of realistic, helpful and pure self-knowledge. This will help so many people understand and recognise what is helpful and what’s not. Thanks heaps for doing this! Such an inspiration
You already ARE a success story. Success is not a one-time end goal. It’s all the little wins that add up over time. I’m so thankful you are sharing and being so open. Keep it up!!!
You are very brave and you’ve helped us/me tremendously. Best of luck on your journey to recovery! 🤗
You're a remarkable young woman. God, I wish I'd had your insight at your age.
You are and will continue to help a great number of people.
❤️
Thank you for everything and stay strong
Dear Ro, I would like to congratulate you on this excellent video. You have shared such an important testimony, in such a clear and helpful way. You truly are wonderful. 👏
I love this video and appreciate the time you took to make it. I also thought about the fact that whatever “friend” I send this to isn’t going to watch it or they will will act like they get it and continue the same behavior.
Omg this video is so amazing🥺 thank u so much for explaining yourself so well and make it easier for other people to open up w their parents and love ones, and also help them understand a bit more about this illness. Sometimes is just so difficult to find the words or try to talk about it, but you just did it perfectly🌷🖤
Can’t be more grateful for all the work and help u bring with every video/post, sending lots of love for u and your family!!🙏🏻🌸🤍
I've been struggeling with depression for 13 years now, which is obviously a lot diffrent but somehow your recovery videos help me on my journey as well. I think it's how you talk about self awareness, self love and deserving certain things that makes me feel safe. I am starting another therapy this week and you are one of the reasons why. Thanks to you I gained enough hope and confidence to start recovering. So, thanks a lot. You are amazing.
Thank you so much. I dont have anorexic but I am and have always been very thin and struggled with food for as long as I can remember. If it hadn't been for your videos I would have never looked into eating disorders (specifically ARFID) and discovered that other people feel the same way I do about food. Watching you face your fears has helped me in ways I cant even begin to describe with my own eating phobias. Thank you so much for your videos, and I wish you all of my best thoughts for your recovery journey!