People pleasing and not knowing what you want

Self esteem series part 7
When you have spent years considering other people’s needs ahead of your own, you can end up in a place where, when someone asks you what you want, you can’t answer because you don’t even know.
How do we deal with this?
When you try to ask “what do I want?” It’s like being in a room full of loud, brash, people, with one person who is very quiet, but who has very important things to say.
Some voices will be shouting “that’s a selfish thing to think about” or “it doesn’t matter what you want.”
But that quiet voice does have something to say. If you can acknowledge that the loud voices are saying their usual stuff and listen to that quiet one.
It might take practice and time, but it’s about noticing small moments where you feel something. It might be feeling calm in the sun, enjoying the taste of a coffee. It’s small reactions to simple things. It doesn’t have to be a sweeping passion or hobby. You don’t have to take up pottery.
It might just be about noticing what things you have a reaction to, and letting that little voice be heard.