10 Defensive Tactics of the Female Covert Narcissist by Lise Leblanc
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- čas přidán 31. 05. 2024
- In this video, I'm talking about 10 defensive behaviors that a female covert narcissist displays in a long-term romantic relationship. Learn their specific tactics through concrete examples and explanations.
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About Lise Leblanc
Lise Leblanc is a Therapist, Life Coach Practitioner, and Author with over 20 years of experience in therapeutic, educational, and leadership roles.
For information about private consultations, please visit my website:
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DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION IN THIS VIDEO IS NOT INTENDED NOR IMPLIED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR PROFESSIONAL ADVICE, DIAGNOSIS OR TREATMENT. Lise Leblanc does not provide personalized psychological, health, or legal advice. Any information or responses provided on CZcams are general and hypothetical, not individualized. This content is for informational purposes only and viewers should verify primary sources and/or seek professional services. Narratives about clients are heavily modified to protect their identities, using blurred details to teach and reassure without revealing private information about individuals.
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DISCLAIMER: THIS IS FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR MENTAL HEALTH CARE.
Introduction (0:00)
You Will be Cast as her Hero (1:00)
Common Red Flags (2:20)
10 Narcissistic Defensive Tactics (3:58)
Other tactics (14:48)
Outro (16:50)
#NPD #covertnarcissist #narcissism #narcissist #narcissistic
Accused of cheating, blame shifting, guilt tripping, no apologies, & gas lighting. Talked to like a 5 year old and poked at for unimportant issues. Its so exhausting.
Gentlemen the good lady said the key phrase " you can't win" . We will never win with them . This information is priceless. Thank you for your content.
The sad part about this, the mask comes off after your feelings are deeply involed and your gaurds are down. And its no longer easy to break the connection... its like somebody saying ... GOTCHA !!!
@@goldiesincity8005 True. 💯
Are you sure there is no way to win?
It's never good enough and you never win. EVER. You'll never get the full truth, and the hypocrisy & contradictions are mind boggling. They never take time to reflect on the themselves and they never solve their own problems.
You will find yourself in a black hole of health, & financial, ruins.
Your pain is their pleasure. Promising they will be there to help you through it but nowhere to be found. They are unpredictable and inconsistent. Normal structure scares them because they despise it. They live in chaos and refuse discipline. It's a constant cycle of half truths, gossip, and anxiety. There is no fixing these people.
@@goldiesincity8005So god damned true. They all wait until you are deeply attached and hooked, when it hurts the most.
Lise, your first 30 seconds describes my ex-wife EXACTLY. It still shocks me just how predictable and recognisable these people are *once you have learned what to look for*.
I separated from my wife of almost 32 years last November. Once you've realised what's going on you can't un-see it. And I've made exactly the same comment. It's amazing how these patterns of behaviour are the same for anyone with covert NPD. I've been watching a lot of videos by Dr. Les Carter (and others) and it's like he is speaking specifically about my wife. She has ruined my life. Isolated me from my children and almost everything that I hold dear. People tell me that it gets better. Honestly, it's very difficult to believe that at the moment.
@@davidhynd4435 It won't GET better, you will MAKE it better!
@@davidhynd4435 you will get better, she won't
@davidhynd4435
I hear you. And, as you know, it really hurts to realise this and - yes - you cannot 'unsee' it or 'unhear' what they've said either. Mine has also isolated me from my children. I think it will take time. I did hear from my youngest last week for the first time since last September.
It really, really hurts to realise this about my ex (after 27 years). No doubt a measure of the love I gave - and you did too.
LOL seriously. It's very validating to hear stuff that just completely clicks.
13 years. She was so nice in public. Once the door closed, the innocent smile went away.
10:46 #6 There will be no apologies.
11:15 #7 Lack of Appreciation
11:28 #8 Gaslighting - Living in their own twisted version of reality
12:44 # 9 Triangulation
13:15 #10 Little Empathy
Defense Mechanism - Avoidant, Dismissive, Unavailable, Unreliable, Unwilling to do the work,
These covert narcissist videos of yours strongly describe the behavior of my soon-to-be ex-girlfriend. It’s terrifyingly similar to the point where I am now educating myself about these matters, and it surprises me how I could have fallen into that kind of rabbit hole.
I also noticed that it’s easy to identify these patterns once we know about them because we can prepare accordingly.
The only positive thing about having a toxic relationship with narcissists is that you learn a lot about their manipulation methods. This makes you feel more adept at detecting the same BS from potential partners in the future.
Thank you for these videos. They are very educational, and I know what the obvious next steps are now that I have finally identified my girlfriend as a potential female covert narcissist.
Yeah dude. A friend of mine whose i fell in love to, started with this. then i realise i got no chance, i step back to friendship and she kept and double, even triplicated the shit she was doing. Lying, manipulation, guilty tripping, silent treatment... I was thinking she was an dismissive avoident but hen i watch a video like this that put in a cronologic way the phases of a narc relation. it was SO spot on that everything made sense then i started studying the matter.
Exactly I learned to lie better 😂😂
@@evilzinabyssranger5695 you got the attachment style right, that's the typical one for a narc
Don't beat yourself up about not catching it. Took me 23+ years before I figured it out and that happened because after describing her behaviors someone on a support board told me I was dealing with a Covert Narc. I'd never even heard the term. Grammatically, it doesn't even make sense. Covert......and a narcissist? Doesn't go together. Doesn't make sense. But after watching literally 100s of videos like this and reading dozens of studies....no question. I'm still dealing with it. year 26
@@evanfrabell8884 he shouldn't sit her down and ask her anything. That's going to turn into a nightmare.
It is crazy how accurate she is.
Was in a post divorce relationship like this, was married for 21 years , where l experienced all these behaviors. I was so clueless, and most of my anger is directed toward myself for enabling this behavior.
You did the best you could with the knowledge you had. Forgive yourself. You're much better than you give yourself credit for.
When I would tell my ex that she hurt my feelings and try to talk about it, she would say that she feels attacked. She would also tell me that "this is too much." She viewed my need to be respected as an affront to her not as a healthy way to resolve a conflict.
Spot on
What an excellent summary of the hell that awaits the victim. It's a lonely journey to recover from this type of abuse.
9:07 after 4 children, 25 years of marriage and then, my life-altering injury with chronic pain and disability she says, "You ruined my life." Her life. And repeats/confirms she wants a divorce. So much of this video is bulls-eye yet again.
U described my ex gf so accurately.. was dating her for three months, first month was all the love bombings and then she started to pull away followed by all the disrespects and leaving me always doubting my self worth. Even then i was trying to make her happy with everything but it all went futile lol Tried to communicate with her but always ended up with arguments and silent treatments, blaming me for everything. Was so stressful and felt like i was walking on egg shells all the time
i discribed it as “ living in a mine field” never knowing when the next explosion would be . it took me 40 years of pain before i said enough. in the famous words of Popeye the Sailor “ That’s all i can stands … and i can’t stands no more” wise words. i wish you well
Yep, every narcissistic cycle happens like this with my woman.
Just went through the rage argument last night. I was sharing with her how my retired mom is getting tired of always taking care of her 79 year old husband who should just be in a nursing home by now, and my sister's 4 kids constantly because my sister lives upstairs from my mom, so shes the daycare.
My woman then made a comment of "Yea, well women are always taught to take care of men, that's the only thing society teaches them." (This is always a challenging because its coming from her deep seated belief that the patriarchy has historically and continues to keep women down). I then kneejerk retorted "Well theres plenty of men who take care of women too."
Her response"Do you really want to have a fight right now?" As her demeanor got defensive, tone got abrubt, etc.
Within 30 seconds I went from hero to zero with all the famous buzzwords of"always " and "never" directed at me.
This isht gets so old.
thank you Lise . oh how i wish …. oh how i wish i heard this 40 years ago . you young guys … listen to this Lady . she speaks the truth. thank you again Lise . you are helping so many
Thank you Lise. You're amazing. Just broke up with my gf of 6 months after realizing she was a covert narcissist. I gave myself a birthday present and did it on my birthday!
Lack of empathy, selective empathy, lack of equity, gaslighting, lack of appreciation for spending money, boundaries for her but not for me, triangulation (tried to turn my own family against me to achieve her objectives), dismissing my concerns, telling me that she wasn't going to change, telling me to accept her as she is or go talk to other girls (while simultaneously accusing me of cheating mind you), etc. You name it, I experienced it.
Went out of my way to make her feel comfortable, even when it it cost me everything, while she went out of her way to make me feel uncomfortable, even when it didn't cost her anything. The only solution that made her happy was the one that maximized my discomfort. She did this while simultaneously telling me that she loved me.
When she had boundaries, they were boundaries, but when I had boundaries, then I was "insecure and controlling".
Even when she got her way and was supposed to be happy, she would manufacture conflicts out of nothing by making more demands upon me.
So how did I get out?
By enforcing my boundaries. I had already made a sacrifice and went against my principles but she demanded even more. It was a bridge too far, so I not only refused to budge, but refused to let her dismiss the topic. I deliberately kept discussing the topic (to get alignment) until she revealed her true self (enforcing your boundaries is like exorcising a demon) which made things really easy. I broke up with her after realizing that she no longer wanted to have an equitable relationship.
So this is officialy the most perfect description of my marriage. Thank you.
I've been learning and dealing with it for a number of years. My friend who is now a professor in psychology, first encouraged me to put this description to my wife, but in fact it's taken me time to figure out my place in the whole system. I'm on a journey, and it's ok.
If she's Nark you'd be in a continous deval until next stage of discard...
My ex wife to the Tee. No one would ever believe it.
@brianmitchell8552 It's called self respect. Respecting yourself and demanding others respect you as well. The most basic principle to be human. If this is so WALK away without having to state the reason. She'll respect that POWER...
Thank you for this video. Much of this describes my wife. She is using the justice system to abuse and harass me. She is trying to take everything in my life away from me. She devalued me and accused me of being a narccissist. No one thinks I am. She had an unethical counselor that told her I am a narccissist, but the truth is that she has covert narcissism and borderline personality disorder. The counselor encouraged her to divorce me and make it so I can not contact her to discuss anything. It is a tragic situation, especially for our children. I wish I could pull her out of the situation and help her.
She uses the counselor to triangulate you. She uses him to punish you.
But in the end it doesn't matter, she would also use an earthworm to triangulate and humiliate you.
Your feeling of wanting to help her is commendable in principle, but be aware that this is probably one of the main reasons why you are in this situation in the first place.
Now is the time to use your strength and compassion for yourself.
All the best!
Best thing you can do is leave her, zero contact and never look back. Ever.
My man. Same here. She called me the narcissist and even our child. In fact she called him a fucking narcissist when he was 2 years old. But she lies ans d cries in family court. And I'm a man who cannot become a female so that I can talk like her and trick the court. Anything you say or do WILL BE TWISTED to accuse you of anything. I've never laid a hand in her or my son. But the marriage broke down because the covert narcissist would get her climax and never care about my needs. Then. Everything else came to light. I then find out about covert narcissist females. And I was floored! I'm going make videos with another username so that the covert cow can't see them. I will share my experiences so that at least 1 man can be aware on this planet.
@@sinntax The triangulation point is a good one.
I understand the sentiment about leaving and never looking back. In my case, I take my oath to my wife seriously. I will love her in sickness and in health. I think she is sick and needs the correct treatment. She is easily manipulated herself, and there would need to be some new ground rules in place. It could certainly come back to bite me again if she wants to return to me and I take her back. I'm willing to take the risk.
I really need to see this 12 years ago. Would have saved me a decade of my life
Thank you - need to hear more about the abuse guys, like me endure. Would that I could have known 20 years ago.
She would call me a kid and treat me exactly as described in the video, for water spots on the floor or counter.
When I listen to you, I feel so much better!
Yes, yes, yes. I had no idea what I was going through. My life fell into pleasing, fixing, tip-toeing, sacrificing, daily. But, like you are saying - never enough, and I ended up the cause of her unhappiness. Crazy - drama - victim - fear - manipulative - anger - bully
Privately, behind closed doors, they're extremely anxious. The thought of going out to a party or bar or function. For days they don't want to go. But come the event, they are the life and soul. Flirting the room making you feel like a stranger of "brother". Accuse you've of being jealous when you rightly pull them up on their behaviour.
But picking up something you said early in this video Lise, I'm learning the older I get, people will only do what you allow them to do.
what you said about selective amnesia, only comitting to their memory a version of events that works for them... oh my god. oh. my. god. no wonder they are so good at gaslighting. they're just saying what they have in their memory, as it's the truth to them. but it's all just make believe to fit in with their narrative. i picked this up intuitively at age 19 but she discarded me when i was close to the truth. and then i was done. left gaslighted and confused and isolated.
The open of this video is a grand slam. It fits like a narcissistic glove.
I had a "friend", first 15 minutes of us meeting, she told a sob story of her past and I fell for it, but found it strange, something always felt off. She triangulated me with her partner, her kids, until I told her to go away, followed by a smear campaign that happened without me even knowing at the time. 2 yrs later, I learned about covert narcissim by researching and learning about parental alienation syndrome, which she is a master of. Its been 4-5 yrs since then, 100%, i believe shes a covert. Her partner is now dead (overdosed). Gratefully, Im free but continually on the alert for these types. Get out fellas or you just might end up dead. RIP, A.
Im no saint in my marriage. But my wife could check every box of this
The biggest disappointment in my life 😢
Backpack full of grievances.
11 years and two newborns. Id never take back my kids, but it's exactly as you described. I used to have structure, discipline, and a generally positive attitude. All of that slowly got eroded away as I committed to someone who i thought was committed to me. They were only there for what they got from me. Supply, resources, a way out of their problems back home, they ran from their past to me, once the cycle repeated with me, they ran from me to the career i helped them build by paying for them to live while they paid off their student debts. All the excuses, deflections, projections, gaslighting and devaluing took place. Now that I've been away for a couple of months, i see all the red flags i overlooked for the last decade, ill never go back, but unfortunately i am now a coparent with a narcissist.
Me too 4yrs 1 son - shes begging for a ring and im still holding out.
Im not out - i cant face not waking up to my son first every morning and last thing he sees at night.
I’m going through a smear campaign with my ex-girlfriend right now. She is always the victim.
Smear campaigns are usually a fruitless, uphill battle. Narc's build a perimeter with the trust of your peers early on and then turn it against you like an electric fence when the poop hits the fan. Ignore it all and let the truth reveal itself. Time to become who you're supposed to be!
While I totally recognize my situation 100% I would like to add 2 points to your list. 1. They are lazy. I don't just mean lazy. I mean LAZY. If they do anything it is such a effort even for the most simple tasks.. And will tell you how hard they had to work. And 2 rarely if ever will say thank you. I have a story to ilustrate this. Most of the times I do the cleaning around the house not because of her but because we have a kid together. And the answer would be "Oh, you didn't have to do that, I would have done it tomorrow" or something like that. Once I told her "If I did it I did it cose I wanted to not because I needed or was obligated to. A simple thank you would suffice." And she just made a face... So yeah. I did not believe this kind of people exist until it happened to me. I am resilient and this things do not affect me. I have a child with this woman and as I have my childhood trauma as well as obviously she has I want my child to have as little trauma as possible. So I have to stick around. There is nothing that life can throu at me that I can not handle and for my child I am willing to accept anything. It is just sad that we could have had a beautiful life but I guess that is just a illusion anyhow. There is no such thing. I still am bewildered of how this kind of people exist. It is like working against yourself and your interests. I just recently came across this information but it has been of great help to evaluate my situation and know how to deal with the problem. Thank you. Great work and you can be sure you are helping a lot of people. My advice to anyone in this situation is if you don't have kids get out fast. I would if I did not have my kid to worry about. Once again thank you and keep up the good work. ❤
That part about antagonizing questioning was EXACTLY what I experienced, especially over mundane things.
Wow, thank you so much for this!! I've watched 50+ hours of similar content, but this video was the real eye opener. I have encountered such a person. I am a highly sensitive empath and know now which people to avoid. They don't recognise their own mistakes, so they can't learn and progress. Thank you!! ❤❤❤
A short about the "No apologies"would be pretty good
Noted 😊
@@LiseLeblanc or one about us old timers . and why we hung on so long . your shows are saving so many from a life of pain .. God Bless you Lise 🙏🏼
@@heyoldman2003 thank you 🙏
I just ended a 2 year relationship with a covert narc. I didnt know thats what she was until your videos popped up and man... its overwhelming how much clarity you bring to this. So much I was confused about. I saw the early signs and flags that came off so self centered and fake, but i ignored them due to some of the reasons you stated in your other videos, and I paid the price for it.
Right now these videos are my only coping strategy to let things be and let her go. To feel understood in what i went through. Its all very fresh. Thank you for putting out this content for me and the many others who suffered through these painful relationships.
I'm sorry to hear that you are suffering so much, and I hope you find healing
You are helping a lot of people. This is simply wow at this point.
OMG 😲 😱 My relationship was like that. Word for word.
I’m sorry to hear that you went through this! I hope it helped you build wisdom and resilience 😊
brilliant! so spot on… 100%!
And, even though situation is not resolvable, understanding helps A LOT. With videos like this, ability to predict/explain situation, some times, ends up on internal positive note
Thank you!
Truly one of the very best videos out there on the covert narcissist wife. To.a. Freaking.T !!! since I've figured out 4 months ago my wife was one after 20 years of marriage... I've watched a ton of videos on this very specific subject. Lisa hit it out of the park on this one
We had exactly those problems. I found out she was stealing from me, confronted her, she made it my fault and I couldn't believe it. We went to a counsellor where we talked everything over and in the end made commitments. Unnecessary to say that she never fulfilled her part - and it was because of me. The real damage is that children were involved.
15:20 this, so completely describes my first marriage it’s uncanny, and every time I thought about leaving suddenly she would roll back in being ultra kind and loving again until she thought she had me back on the hook and then it was back to the same old as describing this videothis video freaked me out it was so accurate. The good news is I left the relationship and I am so happy now considering where I came from in this relationship so there is lots of hope on the other side once you escape you just have to escape.
congrats on leaving successfully
Help - 4yrs 1 son; i cant face not being the first thing he sees in the morning and last thing he sees at night... and knowing what she is I fear for him while I'm not there to defend him from the attacks that will eventually come as they come to me
Yo sir if you are able to live you can provide for your son. Read that 1 million times
This eerily describes my experience. Thank you for putting this information out there. While I don’t believe she is a malicious person, these examples you give are so spot on it’s genuinely unsettling.
dont fall for it man, they know what they are doing. you would know what you were doing if you were doing it to a girl. she knows.
Yes. From the other side of the world, a kindly stranger can describe your relationship as if they wrote it. It's scary real. But it's also completely *knowable* now, by practitioners like Lise. Took me 27 years, but that lesson is thoroughly *learned*.
Narcissists deploy defensive tactics such as projection, denial, and blame-shifting to shield their fragile self-esteem. They deflect responsibility for their mistakes, project their flaws onto others, and adamantly deny any shortcomings. These manipulative strategies help them preserve a positive self-image while avoiding self-reflection or accountability.
Ahhh the antagonistic questions and passive agressive jbss is exactly what my wife does all the time! Almost non-stop it just wares you down, implying everything i do is stupid inefficiency foolish and so on then i say stop trying to fight with me and she says she isnt.
I would have loved to see content like this 30 years ago, but better late than never. Thank you for such clear descriptions of this type of character. I now have a much better idea of what to look for.
To think that one of them even called me a narcissist, all the while trying to change me through unhealthy doses of criticism etc. Turns out they were the narcissist all along! I feel lighter just knowing that, and that also has really helped me.
Merci infiniment Lise!
I've been with a covert narc 4.5 years, and discovered her four days ago. It truly feels like I'm going crazy, it breaks my heart to see her cry and break down when confronted. But I'm holding firm, and every day the mask is more and more obvious. Thank you for the videos and to all the wonderful viewers who comment, all of you are a great help to someone in this situation
god i feel so heard and seen. thank you Lisa
I do see myself being these red flags for covert narcissistic behavior towards my husband. What about him “cheating” and going to strip clubs and gambling our money away? Over the years my behavior has become awful along with his. Now he’s making me watch everything about being a covert narcissist. He’s secretive about our finances and never helps around the house until I lose my temper my patience. Now 16 yrs later he’s finally getting council for himself and now putting me in the category of his bad childhood. There’s a lot of mirroring happening. Everything he’s accused me of he’s doing the exact same thing. I’m tired of the back and forth. When I would ask him anything he’d never want to communicate with me. And he’d have selective memory loss when it comes to his cheating but his text messages were very detailed to his affairs. I just wanted honesty. I too am getting counseling for myself.
Thank you Lisa, for this and many other videos. They’ve helped stopped my head from spinning both during and after a breakup
I love you for explaining this. I hate you for explaining this. I am certain I'm not a narcissist. But you showed me what one looks like.
You masterfully condensed so much excellent information into this one video. Thank you for sharing so much. Not surprised you got a CZcams plaque on your wall. Well deseeced. Congrats! 🎉
Thank you 🙏
I just can’t get over how individuals with these tendencies can be so consistent. I must say that knowing what to expect goes a long way to diffusing or avoiding the associated traps.
It was so confusing when I didn’t understand her need to be right and to find fault - and the insistence that she’s correcting my behavior b/c she’s trying to help me be a better person.
I deal w/ mostly low-intensity efforts - but it’s unnecessary nonetheless.
Mine is mired in religious superiority and political conspiracies - it’s just so predictable when the program kicks in. Thanks to you and others, I can see it turning on.
That means she's also in the subcategories of holy narcissism and cerebral narcissism. Run! That's like the worst of the worst combination.
There's a double meaning whenever she's telling you that she's trying to help you to become a better person. What she really means is that you're not good enough as a person. She's probably already got a harem of other men on her phone on standby (with faked women's names). Whenever you see her sneaking off to the bathroom with her phone - that's why. It is almost guaranteed that she is grooming other people to be your replacement. It would be wise for you to begin preparing yourself for the discard now.
The religious stuff is an overcompensation for the evil that's on the inside. The more depraved that they are on the inside, the more extreme they must present the mask to show the opposite. It's a sign that their Shadow side is far worse than normal. Extreme religious zealotry is usually used to mask either mental illness or evil, and there can be a very fine line between the two.
Another, more spiritual way of looking at it is that the Devil always presents himself as an angel of light. His demonic minions do the same. And these people do, in fact, endanger one's soul as much as his sanity.
Let me guess: Catholic?
Dear MS. Leblanc,
I’ve watched too many videos to count about a female covert narcissist.
Your outstanding video summed up my last 53 years exactly.
Yes! 53!!
I remember the very day she pulled the plug on me. It was a Saturday. I’ll never forget that day.
Two years later she started her 10 year sex charged affair. I noticed some things were not right but I never considered what she was doing. Not even once. How stupidly blind was I!!
I get it all now some 40 years later. It’s too late for me.
Thank you.
Don't give up, even if you make it only at your last but free breath
I have been wrong the whole 15 years. Ive never heard an apology and yes I've had the whole catalog pulled out on me several times the score is 100 -0 in her favor. Have been dealing with her anger, irritation, and blaming me for everything that's wrong in her life. There is no sex and if so it's emotionless amd she gets mad at me for asking for it so i stopped. Constantly accusing me of manipulating. I had been convinced that there is something wrong with me and I'm in therapy healing while she refuses to go. My eyes are opening and I don't believe im the problem after all.
You didn’t ski a beat, everything said here is the most accurate video i have ever seen.
I see this happening to my friend. Poor dude.
But now I understand why he's changed so much... 😢
It is a challenging situation as my spouse, who operates covertly, currently exerts significant control over our circumstances. The issue arises from the fact that our shared property has appreciated in value, yet neither of us possesses the financial means to buy out the other. Consequently, we find ourselves at an impasse. Despite exhaustive efforts on her part, we remain unable to resolve the situation. It is particularly perplexing considering that her family has a history of diagnosed cluster B personality disorders, institutionalization, and instances of sexual abuse. Nevertheless, I am unjustly vilified for refusing to acquiesce to their manipulative tactics any longer.
OMG! The distrust, the arguing about things that I have degrees & licenses to practice, constant insults defended as "jokes," projection, demands to live up to her expectations & when I completed everything she asked she told me I took too long.
Let me add we have been married 30 years. She was 27 and now 58. Over half of her life has been with me and her moving out has been devastating. I'm 17 yrs older and now feel like an old man with no where to go.
This video is insanely scary to watch. It reaaaaallly accurately describes a lot of what I just went through. I have also wondered myself if when I was attempting to get through to her about certain arguments where I just wasn't being heard at all, I had suggested couples therapy or bringing in a non-bias third party to help with the communication, is that triangulation? I was really concerned that maybe I was attempting to triangulate her and make her feel in the wrong, but I did make it a point to want the third party to be NON bias. So, I guess my question is, is therapy or counseling for helping with communication a form or triangulation? Or is triangulation more about setting it up to be heavily in your favor when you attempt to make a point rather than make effective progress?
Walk.. run..!
couples therapy won't help in a case like this, it might even cause you more trouble. go to therapy by yourself and discuss whether it's a good idea with your therapist.
Dude your over thinking this. YOU KNOW WHAT 2 DO.
Lise thank you for talking about this!! This isnt talked about enough. Glad i got out after 2 years and 6 months of my life. Could have been way worse.
Thank you Lise
Great video ❤
Been in a relationship for seven years and everything you say it makes complete sense. Thank you.
Wish all therapists were like you. Must be the Canadian water.
Thanks Lise
You are so accurate ! Thank you for the content ❤🎉
Thank you so much
100 percent spot on with my life, thank you once again lisa.
Thank you.
So true on every point...I'm the bad guy, I'm the monster and everything that goes wrong in her life is my fault🤯🤯🤯
You said so much in such a short time. So very true and to the point.
Thank you
Yes, it is very helpful. thankyou so much.
You're so good at explaining this. Thank you so much.
Thank you so much for making these videos, the information I have received has really opened my eyes.
Oh my Gosh! You are describing this 💯
Another great video, Lise. 200k coming this year!! 🎉
This is so brilliant. I have to say.
thank you..this really summarize the relationship with bpd spouse
Holy crap ..thank you for this information it explains my frustration
Thank you for creating this video. One thing I'd love to see you expand upon is how narcissism is also inherent in anti social and bordeline personality disorder. Also how through social media we can more easily emulate successful people who might be higher in anti social traits and self centered actions and thus raising the bar for what is a normal level of narcissism by emulation
Great suggestion, Thank you!
Thank you 😊
Lise, thank You so much for your videos they have helped me so much
Blessings
This Episode Nails it 💯⭐️
❤ I now see what I couldn't or didn't want to see all along. This has been the worst experience in my life. Luckily I was rescued by a coach after 11 months of relationship. I'm still recovering. It's a process. Trust in it and watch these videos whenever you get too sentimental about the past. You deserve better!
Your words are incredibly precise description and you don't know how much it heals
Truest words have never been said. Perfect description to the T. I had a pleasure of dating not one, not two, but three of those wonderful ladies.
@em7937 English. Do you speak it mf?
Oh my god! The Russian spy reference got my screaming 😂😂
Lucky this showed up on my feed god I love you so much
Lise thanks for the great content and the clear way you explain them. Introducing examples makes a whole difference and makes it much easier to understand this very nuanced topics of narcissism, many thanks for that.
This video is a perfect summation of a covert narc
100% accurate description of my ex
Thank you. I give you credit as the 1st person in the summer of 2022 for blowing the lid off of my CN.
That's EXACTLY what happened
#AMAZING!
Omg ive said a thousand times im not the enemy! You are amazing thank you for your work
Hi Lise I know I've asked this before but I'd love it if you could do a video on malignant narcissism (male) & cyberstalking. 'My' narc cyberstalked me for near on 2 years; eventually I was hospitalised due to the trauma having suffered a manic episode. Initially I wasn't believed & gaslit but fortunately my fiancé became aware of what was going on & we started to accrue evidence. Honestly it was living hell - I was stalked in work, my phone hacked, all my social media accounts etc. I'm past caring what he could do with my information if anything it would just give me more evidence.
Thank you for explaining this so well. I went through this with my ex and it was like a living nightmare.
Hi Lise
You are just spot on!
I enjoy your videos very much - here in my 2. year since I decided to terminate my 11 years long relationship with a lady, that had the behaviour 99,99 % as you have so cleverly summarized. Thanks❤for your services.
Br Jacob, from Copenhagen
all ten of these tactics she did to me, you're so righty didn't know what I was dealing without wasn't a normal behavior,now I know what she was ,thanks
Every single word you said in this video is what I am going through and is that person that something is that I love with my full heart
Thank you for the video and thank you to the commenters for showing i’m not alone
Oh my gosh, a literal description of my marriage!! So maddening!! 😩
Uff been there, done that until I was discarded. Literally word for word description.