I’m Trans Too! | Reacting to Trans Joy
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It's the little moments of joy that can be so important - here are some cute happy trans moments!
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I’d like to thank my grandma for telling me that she accepted me Christmas last year after my dad told me my identity was wrong. Her birthday was yesterday, thank you again grandma.
happy belated birthday to your lovely grandma ❤
❤️❤️❤️ happy birthday to your epic grandma
aw happy birthday to your grandma :))
yay grandma!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOUR GRANDMA SHE SOUNDS GREAT
Positive Trans Story: Not long after I had come out to a friend, I met up with her for coffee. I was wearing one of my feminine outfits in public for the first time, and when we sat down at the café the waiter came over to us and said "Are you ladies ready to order?" This is a café I had been going to since I was about three years old, but the waiter was one I didn't recognise and was probably new there. It was such a small thing but I was grinning like an idiot for the whole rest of the day. After she walked away my friend looked at me excitedly and said "She called you a lady!" It was an absolutely lovely moment and one I'll always remember.
Pan over to the waiter confused as hell.
KEEP BEING AN AWESOME LADY
AHHHH, THAT'S SO CUTE
The day after I cut my hair (ftnb) a random kid sat at our table and, out of all the cis people, he asked Me if I was a boy or girl and I just _stared_ at my ftm friend, he stared back-
The kid assumed I was a girl and moved on I don't talk to him anyway
ohh my god that is so adorable, i have a trans friend who had a similar experience. She was leaving a store or cafe of some sort and the cashier said to her and her friend "You girls have a good day!"
I work in pediatric healthcare, and the hospital I work in has implemented “non-binary” as a gender designation on our charting software and we’ll enter preferred names and pronouns if a patient discloses them. There’s also a way to enter these things with an added, immediately visible warning if the patient is not yet out to their parents. It’s just really nice to see everyone taking these things seriously because they truly care about children being healthy. I’m seeing more and more people put their own pronouns in their email signatures as well
Oh, that’s amazing!
This is so sweet! I imagine if a kid is at a hospital it might be so reassuring and calming to be referred to by their preferred names/pronouns, especially if they aren't able to get that at home.
I went for a tubal ligation and the hospital I went to asked for the same information. It honestly took me by surprise and I felt so happy to see those options when I signed my consent form
That sounds so great🥰
Love it🙂
Mine does too, I came out to my doctor (I’m 14, genderfluid) and the next time I was there, my chart said non-binary. I was soooooooo happy
One positive story: My name change hearing was over the phone and the judge was talking to my dad saying something like "hello is deadname here" and my dad said "yes he's my son." The judge kept misgendering me and my dad kept correcting him. This is really big personally because my pa has said some really transphobic and nasty things in the past :) i never thought he'd get around to supporting me but now he's my biggest ally.
I also told my favorite teacher about how I finally changed my name and he gave my a high-five. The people in my life are really amazing and I'm grateful for them
That’s so great.
Wherever there was hate, there can be hope. I’m so happy for you and your dad, good sir.
good for you and good for him!
I'm sitting here crying, I'm so happy for you!!
i never actually came out to my grandad because i didn’t know how he would react but my dad must have told him because he rang me today and used my chosen name and called me his grandson he also told me he would take me suit shopping because he knew i only had my school uniform his exact words were “a gentleman is never complete without a decent suit” i cried
hnghhghanagah that's so wholesome
That's actually so wonderful and wholesome!
AAAAAH THAT COMMENT ALMOST MADE ME CRY. WHAT AN AWESOME DUDE.
Dementia hit him hard
THAT'S INCREDIBLE :')
Positive trans story: Yesterday my school took a Saturday trip (a fairly common occurrence at my school, but since it was the first of the year so everyone was excited). I'm not out to many people, only my partner who is also mostly closeted and a few of our friends. When people ask about my pronouns, because it's easier than saying they/them and having to correct people or explain myself, I usually say any and people use only she/her since I don't pass all too well. Well, we went to a mall and I spent the entire time with people I was out to and the whole time they gendered both me and my partner correctly. The cherry on top of it all was when I bought a nonbinary pride pin and told the clerk at the store that there was a class trip. When we were leaving he says rather loudly to his coworker "That kid told me they're on a trip with their class, that's why we've been so swamped!"
Edit: Unrelated, but I am not NB and don't use they/them anymore. I am just a trans guy lol. Took me a while to figure it out, but I honestly owe a lot of my getting here to great people like Jamie who always put out positivity. I am glad that there are creator out there that allow the message of it being okay to take your time and figure it out. Truly, thank you.
Hell yeah!!
Sobbing /hj /pos
AAAWW THATS SO SWEET
aww! I hate how people only seem to use the easiest pronouns for them rather than use an equal mix or ask you for more details about if that's OK first. We're good now but initially when I came out to my family and said "my pronouns are they/them" then my parents apparently heard that as "she/they" and figured they could just continue using she then. Which just no? People don't have multiple pronouns so they can only be called by one set of them. And why not default to they if you're going to pick only one of the two to use? I see it most commonly with celebrities I guess and it feels like it shows something very telling.
@@asterismos5451 I agree, I have a friend who uses all pronouns, although everyone always calls them a “she” because they present more feminine. He keeps telling those people that always use she/ her for him that when he says he uses all pronouns he wants them to mix it up a bit, but they don’t listen. It’s annoying how people always go to the easiest option.
that 5yr old be like
“a hate you with a burning passion, but i’ll respect your pronouns brother.”
LITERALLY💀💀💀💀💀 and i cannot get mad cause they already won my hesrt using the right pronouns
@@danone2414 IKRR
Children are too pure
Alright here’s some cute trans stories I have:
1) When I came out to my older sister (who was 16 at the time) she had known I had something important to tell her but didn’t know what it was about. Her reaction was “Oh thank God! I thought you had cancer or something!”
2) Shortly after starting testosterone, I was at my college library and saw they had some pronouns pins. When the librarian who was checking my books out noticed me look at them, she immediately said “sorry, we ran out of the he/him ones.” Cue massive gender euphoria.
3) I was visiting my grandparents a couple weeks ago and saw they hang a trans pride flag from their window where you can see it from the road.
Aaaaaaaaaa that all sounds so so cuuuute. Also sorry I had to ruin the 69 likes, this was all too cute 😅🥺🥺🥺🥺
Those are awesome stories.
lmao when I came out to my friend as gay she also thought I had cancer
Omg I had exactly the same thing from my older sister! Asked her to have a “bit of a serious chat” and she stressed about my upcoming cancer revelation for weeks 😂
“Hey spuds” Makes my day every time
@Tobias__ My beloved
@@Mimi-kn9jd same but i love both of your pfps so much
@@katiefairfull7311 tyyyy
*Happy potato sounds
me too, I am straight up being called out
One time I was on the bus and wanted to get off I was telling the bus driver that this was my stop but he ignored me, suddenly I heard this guy behind me addressing the bus driver and said “hey! This lady wants to get off!” I didn’t pass at that time but I was wearing my jacket with my pronouns embroidered on the back. Knowing what this random stranger did for me means so much and I regret not saying thank you to him, but it fills me with hope that this planet still has a chance to be better
That's so nice!! I'm happy for you
I very recently came out as transfemme, and my genderfluid friend and her hippie mom have been showering me in skirts and wigs and I just feel so nice it makes me wanna cry
I hope things are going well, stay safe
aww im so happy for you!!
Queer friends and family are so important! Absolutely saved me so many times early on
I came out as transmasc(?) a couple of days ago and my friends have been giving me memes about me going as he/they. And a friend introduced me to his friend he works with and called me “him” the whole time. Thinking about it made me cry.
Trans guy here: A while back my mum referred to me as her son to a train station employee. As we walked away she turned to me and said "I love being able to call you my son". I barely held back from crying. I love her so much
that is beautiful :')
Sweet!
i’m crying rn, this is so lovely
WHY ARE TEARS FLOWING OML 😭❤
😭❤️❤️
My boss just corrected a coworker by saying “it’s not her of him, just use Isabeau instead” it made me tear up
Isabeau is such a cute name :D
Sadly my coworkers don't get it. At all 😖
@@MyAnanin ❤️
Can someone explain why the singular “they” is so difficult for people? Is it the idea that they then trip up on is/are? Like, it’s silly. “Someone lost their wallet.” Okay… you don’t believe a group of people owns that wallet, right?
That name is so cute! I love it. What a beautifully non-binary name it is too.
I wear a pronouns pin and a Trans Rights are Human Rights pin at work. Whenever I get a comment/compliment on them I tell people where I got them (a shop close to where I work). That way I a) have a ready response that I can use instead of getting into a full convo at work, and b) if their comments were due to them also being trans but not wanting/able to say, they know where to find them.
I also talked my manager into keeping a pride flag up year-round because it makes our shop feel like a safer space for people. I've had people upset about a bad situation at another store even stop in to ask assistance specifically because the flag on the door. We are always looking for and looking out for each other.
I wish I lived in your area, or at least one similar to it.
Most businesses where I live have a small pride sticker in the window, usually with some message about being a safe space. I wonder if that makes LGBTQ people feel safe, or if because it's so standard they figure it might not be genuine
I teach HS and I found this channel when I had my first ever trans student a few years ago. So many of the other teachers misgendered him and didn't see the issue! I learned so much from him and Jamie. Now I'm a sponsor for our school's GSA. I'm so proud of these kids from rural Texas for being who they are! It's not easy but we are trying to make our school more inclusive every day!
Thank you so much for doing what you do!
Thank you
Bless you 😭❤️
You're a good person.
I remember when my mum accidentally used they/them pronouns for me while on the phone to her friend (not knowing at the time that they were my preferred pronouns) and she didn't correct herself.the shock factor took me by surprise and I started crying :) but my favourite moment was Christmas Day morning last year, I walked into the kitchen after opening gifts with my mum and my dad said "good morning Eden!" after never calling me it before, my sister started smiling and I sobbed into her shoulder for a solid minute and a half. I got lots of amazing Christmas presents that year, but finally hearing my name from a member of my family was the best Christmas gift I could've ever gotten.
Every time I hear my mom refer to me using they/them when I'm not in the room/while texting other people it always makes me happy. She's very open with her support on the matter but she still messes up quite a bit, but it makes me so happy that she tries as much as she does
@@pluto3194 that's so lovely!
Is your name Eden? I think it's very pretty.
@@Schnort thank you!!
@@edenmariemusic :]
I sold Trans pride stuff at a convention once, and I had a lot of kids who dressed like their agab together with their parents buying my stuff. And the parents asking what this colour sheme mean, and the kids got beet red and told their parents to not ask. I’m so sorry for my closet family, but we are all in this together!
What does agab mean? And crazy
@@Elitigent assigned gender at birth
@@Elitigent assigned gender at birth
Ahh, I wish I could have bought something, I always hope to see something like this at a store and be able to buy something without my parents knowing what it meant
A good cover name for the trans flag colors is cotton candy
The story about the person studying to be a teacher reminds me why I plan to be open about my queerness and asexuality when I'm a teacher. It's so important to be visible, to normalise it, to show that they can ask you questions, to educate people. For me, too, a gay teacher was the first queer person I ever met and the first person I came out to.
Same here, I am very open about me being trans and bisexual. My first approach when meeting someone is usually to tell them that if they have questions, they are free to ask anything and I'll tell them in case a question makes me uncomfortable (which rarely happens because I know most dont mean to be rude in general, they just sometimes dont know how to ask) I even started educating some of my teachers at professional school about LGBT+ topics. I believe if we portray it as a completely normal thing, also towards kids, people will all someday know its completely normal and nothing to be ashamed of.
yeah I think teaching kids about LGBTQ+ identities from a young age is really important because they're usually very open to new things. I remember when I was in gr 3 or 4 there was a nonbinary student teacher in our class for a while and our teacher told us to use mx. and they/them pronouns for them so we just did. it wasn't weird to us or anything. sometimes people, including me, misgendered them because they were relatively femme presenting and yknow we were kids... but most of the time we corrected ourselves on our own. it's amazing how open-minded and accepting kids are before they're taught that some ways of existing are "right" and others are "wrong"
Yes, it's so important to normalize expressing who you are! I made myself a bisexual pride flag colored kippah and I wear it almost every day. I have had literal children approach me to quietly say that they're bi, too. When we do this, we're making it safer for others to be out. (I hope I live to see the day when my non-binary firstborn can safely walk down the street, alone, with their impressive beard, wearing something pink and frilly if they feel like it that day.)
I remember the first teacher that ever used my chosen name, it was in 9th grade and I wasn't coming out to any teacher, but I was just presenting it as a weird nickname thing. None of them wanted to hear it, but she told me that them not respecting my request was not ok, and I broke down in her arms.
It was literally our first class together, and all my classmates saw it [super embarrassing], but I needed to do it. First adult to ever respect me, I'm in my last year now and I know she's gonna be one of the only teachers I'll never ever forget.
I haven't told her I'm trans, but sometimes I wonder if she suspects.
I have a teacher who has all sorts of pride/support stickers on her laptop, eg; Aboriginal rights and LGBTQ+ pride/rights.
So whenever I look in her direction during class I immediately an a4 sized support rectangle. I love it a lot
I’m not sure of her sexuality, and I’m sure as shit not going to ask because I’m awkward af, but knowing she’s at least an ally makes me like her even more than I already do
Coming as out as transgender as made my son so much more confident with himself. He left school several years ago as a she/her and suffered from social and school based anxiety. After two years of cyber school and coming out he is now the happiest I have seen him in years. His courage has actually even given me the confidence to come out as transgender too.
ik this is a year old, but congrats to you both!:) wishing you two the best
The non-binary teacher reminded me of a story I have to tell:
The past 2 years I lived in a mainly hetero and completely cis house (16 ppl) as the only genderfluid person. They hung up pride flags and called me my preferred name and pronouns most of the time.
A couple months ago we got a new roommate and she immediatly asked about the flags, since she new the most common ones, but didn't know things like the non-binary, intersex and ally flags. About a month in, she said she wanted to invite us all for Pizza and I had a suspicion. When we all got together she hugged me very tightly and wispered "We're going to be Ok". At first I thought she meant that I'll be alright despite my panicking when many people are around, but now I understand how much that sentence must've meant to her. She brought in the Pizza and when everyone was quietly eating she started a conversation with "I have an anouncement to make. [OP] and I might not be so different after all. I think I would like to use [feminie name] from now on." I nearly dropped my piece. She then went on to explain how much confidence she found after seeing everyone interact with me and my transness in a very normal way and I nearly cried.
She and I stayed a little longer, had a talk, and cleaned up afterwards and when it was time for bed, she gave me the biggest hug and we both started bawling. It felt so good having another trans person see you and knowing that all the struggles and self-doubt I faced made a difference for even one person. I hope I will never forget that and will always show myself as who I am so others will be able to too.
It's so strange that people just being decent humans can bring such joy. But, I love that having manners makes people smile!
So, I'm going to continue in the ways in which I was raised, because I love seeing this sort of happiness. Kindness should always feel euphoric!!!
I feel like it takes a hundred acts of kindness to help offset 1 act of violence.
❤️
I know, right?
We have a few places we used to go regularly, and it was always something to watch the people who knew us light up when they saw us coming.
... which also made us a bit sad to know that everybody else were such cretins that us being decent human beings stood out at all. :(
Positive trans story: When I came out as trans to my mum, she was confused about it. Even though she didn't completely understand, she said that she's seen how happy I look when people call me a boy and that makes her happy too
She doesn't know, but she doesn't immediately push it away. That is the mark of a good person
I met my friends' daughters the other day, and the younger one (~4) looked at me the moment I walked into the room and went "What are your programs?" I had a bit of an existential crisis about whether or not I was secretly an android until her older sister (~9) chimed in "Pronouns." I was really excited (though not surprised) that my friends are teaching their kids to ask about pronouns politely instead of assuming them. It was second nature for these girls and it was beautiful. Also I've started asking all my friends what their programs are
This is the hope I need for the world
What are your programs? Lol
I go by windows vista/windows 10
@@Stick_and_stone IM DYING
My programs are world domination and human enslavement. Beep boop!
This is so lovely
Small story but I’m genderfluid and though I’m out to my parents they struggle with even they/them pronouns. One day, when I was feeling hyper-masculine (not fun when you’re afab) I didn’t have my chest under with me as we were on vacation. At a little cafe, this person was delivering our food and addressed me as “Sir”.
I was overjoyed and wish I had told the waiter how much that meant to me.
For anyone with a trans friend/child, even the little things can make such a big impact.
aww thats so great! im genderfluid too(afab) and I wish something like that would happen to me. I look pretty feminine, so I doubt I would ever pass as a boy(which sucks) but I probably will cut my hair shorter soon, so that might help. but yeah, I can relate. even someone using he/they pronouns made my whole day. its not that I don't like 'being a girl' but I just don't feel fully comfortable with it. sorry to rant here though
aww, I totally get how that feels! I'm genderfluid too [also afab], a few times while walking my dog I ran into some kids in the neighborhood, and because I always wear hoodies and look like death [hey, if the 'pale teen boy that looks like death' trope helps, who am I to complain?] they've always called me sir.
There's been a few times where they heard my voice and then tried to correct themselves, but I just told them they were right the first time and despite being confused, they ran with it.
If all kids were taught to be mindful at the age those kids were at, we wouldn't have so many demons and bullies in middle school. It takes so long to unlearn that hatred, some of them never do.
@@LoreCatan yeah, i agree with you. there are some people who are stupid jerks and purposefully misgender me and stuff, but I guess that just makes me ten times happier when I find people who understand or even just accept me. All people should be raised to be accepting of others, it would definitely make the world better. and I know that sounds dumb or whatever but its true. like its not that hard to just use they/them pronouns for others if you don't already know their gender. nobody really minds they/them pronouns being used from what I've seen. and you don't have to make a big deal out of it if I don't look like how I identify. just go with it and be respectful.
Congratulations on making it this far, I'm sure it wasn't easy but I never doubted you. Remember often people that criticize your life are usually the same people that don't know the price you paid to get where you are today. Keep going, I believe in you and your valid and always will be.
Thanks!
Thank you sm
(:
🥲
ngl, i sorta really needed to be reminded of this
thanks random internet stranger
I was called "m' lovely" by a 40-50 something year old bloke in a Spar shop.
After a year of growing out my hair and learning to look after it properly, it is super curly and looking freaking amazing and everyone always compliments me on my hair it's great!
And after ~7 months on HRT I now have a small pair of breast, every time something unexpectedly brushes past and I'm reminded of them is the best feeling ever!
I love your videos and I love hearing trans positive stories, more of this please!
aaaaaw Charlotte! what a beautiful name😊 also I am glad you are happy with your HRT changes
My daughter chose Charlotte as her name. So pretty :)
Oh my gosh thats amazing!
@@Sorkabeth Hello, I just wanted to tell you that your short sweet comment made me tear up just now. I rarely see parents talk openly about their trans kids online so it just means a lot to me.
This gives me a lot of encouragement. I want to start doing what I can to transition to non-binary (I'm a minor so I can only really do things that are semi-easily reversed), but it would require some decent upkeep for myself and I've been fairly discouraged. This just gave me new encouragement to do it, because it seems like it's worth the work!
I was going to visit my Auntie in her nursing home, and when I asked one of the staff how to get to her room, she replied "Oh you must be Rebecca, she has told us all about how you use to be her nephew but now are her niece, she's very very excited to meet you today Rebecca" ...... It melted my heart how accepting and loving she is.
I get asked a lot if I'm a boy or a girl (I'm neither), usually by kids. Usually the parents get embarrassed or say something like "that's obviously a [boy/girl]"
One time this little girl at my work asked me, and her mom looked at her and said very gently: "some people aren't a boy or a girl, and that's okay" and I about cried lol
Because I like to do things out of spite towards people I don't like, I put my preferred name and pronouns on a biography paper I had to do for my English class at the beginning of the year. I didn't like my English teacher one bit and I had a sneaking suspicion she was probably transphobic. I was nervously awaiting the moment I would get the paper back, because even though I do things out of spite, I still get anxious about others' reactions at times. I eventually got the paper back and she wrote that she would try with my pronouns and has called me Josh ever since. It was so nice to hear my name come from a teacher that I almost cried.
Also, my art teacher caught on to my friends calling me Josh and asked me if that's what I'd prefer to be called. Now she calls me Josh too!
They remind me that there is some good in the world, no matter how much the boys in my grade want to make me feel bad for being so open about who I am.
I am proud of you, Josh!
You go, Josh! You are valid!
You are so valid josh ( from brick )
Coming from a family of teachers and having a friend with (100% true) 12 first names for half my school career, here's pro tip:
At the start of the year/course, just wince when a teacher calls you the name on the roll, and go "Everyone calls me Josh, Sir/Ma'am." in a tone that suggests you have been through this approximately since the dawn of creation, and it is starting to get just a smidge tedious. If it's a few weeks into the school year, just go up to them after class and gently inform them you didn't want to make their lives difficult on the first day, but they've been calling you by a name that's purely administrative, it's starting to feel a bit awkward, and you go by Josh in real life.
You don't even have to come out for this if you feel unsafe or uncomfortable: all teachers have at least one kid in every class whose parents put their full legal name into the registration form, regardless of what is used in everyday life. or how related that legal name is to the practical one. I've helped my mom sort paperwork for over a decade, she never had a single student list without at least one crossed out or corrected name on it.
I have another one:
I'm ftm and have been out for round about 4 years. My family has been very supportive from the very beginning but the deadnaming was a problem for quite a while since they didn't understand the problem with it. All of them got around eventually though except for that one grandma who after three years still managed to use my deadname on a family gathering. The positive site: the whole rest of the family shouted my actual name into her face. Like literally, they all shouted it in union, adults and kids alike, all with the same annoyed tone. I was in the kitchen overhearing the conversation and almost died of laughter because the situation was somewhat hilarious.
That's like tv show lol.
Everyone rolls their eyes "Grandmaaa it's [correct name]!" *laughter track plays
I (MtF) came out to my brother (9 years older than me) when I was 3 weeks on HRT. His immediate response was, "I have a sister". With the same shock and astonishment a child would have when introduced to their new baby sibling. No "what ifs", no questions, just unreserved acceptance.
Not everyone of my bio family was accepting of me, so I treasure that memory.
Just to make you a little nervous I am going to start by saying I am pale, stale, and male (old white dude), also cis and hetero. Recently my niece announced that she and her girlfriend are getting married, and two of my friends have come out as trans. This has made me very happy for two reasons. Firstly it means that my circle of friends and family includes a more statistically normal spread of genders and sexualities. Secondly it means I live in a society where people feel safe to express less common identities.
aw its so cool that you support them. with the whole 'cis white men are homo/transphobic' its great to see somebody who breaks the stupid stereotype. please don't change!
It also means that these people feel comfortable enough around you to come out and be themselves. So, keep doing what you're doing, because you're doing great!
Wow dude, as a closeted trans guy, I can safely say, thanks so much for your support. The world needs people like you to change it for the better! You're really awesome and thanks!👍
‘Pale, stale and male’ made me laugh so much! Thanks for being an absolute top bloke, you’re clearly a very trustworthy person. Rock on.
You've probably already heard it before but be happy and proud of small things like people feeling safe and loved enough to tell you these things about themselves. They may seem ordinary, but it's still very special to see.
I've actually had to delete my watch history here on CZcams just to restart everything. My recommendations videos started just becoming transphobia despite me being trans and watching trans CZcams.
So, in that first 30 seconds of the video, it just hit me like a brick: "there's a lot of transphobia, but there's also a lot of trans positivity." Thank you for reminding me of that
It's weird, isn't it? I had random recommendations for some Catholic channels and I was like wtf, get out of my algorithm!
How can I do that too? I keep getting bad videos :/
@@bonthebunnycat667 i don't know how to help if you are on computer, but, if you're on mobile, click your profile picture, go to settings, click "History and Privacy" and click "clear watch history," and for good measures "clear search history"
On mobile you can click on the little dots on the right, next to the video you don't want to get recommended, and then click on "no interest" or something like that. So the algorithm should learn from that, that you don't like these videos.
I hope it works for you too.
@@schokoloko2092 I've been doing that but it still recommends me stuff I don't want @-@
Jamie giving us the seratonin we need
seratonin
Now he needs to give me a fresh box of tissues, too. 😋
He is a true king
@@AndaraBledin here you go 🧻
A couple months ago I hit my 1 year anniversary on HRT. I woke up to find the house decorated with pink ribbons and tiaras and an 'it's a girl' balloon. My roommate/best friend had secretly bought a bunch of the most girly party decorations she could. All of my friends came over that day, all with funny and adorable cards. I felt so loved and supported.
For some reason, I legit gasped and exclaimed, out loud, "SUIT SHOPPING???" when I heard that that grandpa wanted to take his grandson out to buy a suit. OMG why is that so fucking precious???
I'm an ally myself, unless you count being Demi. I don't because I don't feel like it effects my life that much
I just wanted to say how important these videos are. Knowing how little it can take to make someone feel noticed has really inspired me.
I'm a big bearded country boy that works at a little hic grocery store. We don't get many openly LGBTQ+ people, but every time I see a pride shirt or anything, I make a point to compliment the person wearing it. Thanks to you, I now know why they always smile so big.
Thank you.
If you're demi you're part of the aspec crew and definitely part of the lgbt+ community. You don't have to embrace it if that's how you feel but the ace community is generally very accepting. Also we have cake, or garlic bread if you prefer.
@@Toni-lo9ms Thank you. I guess I just wasn't sure if it counted.
Being Demi did cause a little grief in high school, but only because I didn't understand why I wasn't interested in "checking out" girls with my friends. So I guess I don't feel like I've earned a spot, if that makes sense.
That being said, if you'll count me, I'm in. Garlic bread, please!😀
@@jeremyblade7561 I get that a lot.
Here's the deal, Demi, in a sexuality context, means you're asexual until you're not. If you only experience sexual attraction after an emotional connection is established that makes you ace spec as well as demi. Allos feel sexual attraction just by looking at people they find attractive. Those who have no sexual attraction or feel it under special circumstances rather than on the regular fall under the ace umbrella.
You don't need to have experienced oppression and discrimination to belong
@@Cerasum_chrysanthes Louder for those in the back.
Though, fair warning, you'll experience some eventually (at least online) being openly lgbtq of any identity.
Source: first time I mentioned it to a fellow ace on a CZcams stream two days after coming out as ace.
You aren’t “passing”. You are being seen as who you really are. (Signed) Memaw
More! More!
I’m genderqueer and I am a preschool teacher. Its awkward to try establishing my pronouns, but last month we have a new hire who is non-binary and also uses they/them. That on its own was validating, but we had a moment where we were working with the kids (we rarely work in the same room) and we both used our pronouns while teaching the kids and it was amazing. To the fact that by validating my coworker, my other coworkers are starting to recognize that we go by they/them and I’m hoping we can normalize it in the work environment.
Yo old comment but as someone also working in a preschool, do you have any advice on what to do if a kid asks if you're a boy or a girl and won't accept "sometimes people are neither" for an answer
@@wow2926 lately I’ve just been saying “I’m not a boy or a girl, I’m just a teacher” it’s been satisfactory for my three year olds so far. I do know some kids will question more, and I’m still struggling a bit myself. (The hire mentioned in my comment left for another workplace.)
Sometimes I defer to “how do you feel about yourself/what do you see yourself as?” and then use that as a starting point. “Some people look one way, but feel another.” I’m sorry this was not as helpful. It’s important to just make sure you can explain yourself, without causing the child to feel doubt about how they see themselves.
@@Kiku91 no, that is helpful! It's a bit of a dumb fear but I'm always worried if some kid does understand what I'm saying they'll tell a parent about it and I'll get an angry call :/
@@wow2926 it’s not dumb, and depending where you live it can be a risky conversation. I would also suggest to ask your supervisor in case there are any protocols on that subject (if it’s safe to do so). Kids are usually pretty understanding, or tolerant. Bigotry is a learned behavior, and younger kids have the capacity to see different perspectives and be accepting.
A few weeks ago, I went to an skateboarding place with my sister, we weren’t very good at skating and had never been to a prober skatepark before. There was this young man there who was helping out the kids and noticed us struggling, and rushed over to help. He taught us so much and is the reason we are able to skate, since neither of us have the courage to go up to someone and ask for help. Well, when we were learning some tricks on the ground (super easy ones) he randomly asked if we were brother and sister. I’m not fully out to anyone, though my close friends know I’m probably not a girl, and I just panicked and said yes. He was referring to me as ‘mate’ and ‘dude’ the entire time he was helping me, and it was probably the first time I’ve been gendered correctly, since I was quite feminine when I was younger. (I know this video is oldish but I just wanted to share this)
I work in a food shop, often as a cashier, and I've been wearing pronoun pins with the permission of my boss while I wait for changes from Testosterone to take effect. I often feel awkward wearing them, like I'm being outed constantly, and I've noticed I don't get called sir anymore like I sometimes did before (though I still get called ma'am on a pretty frequent basis -- customer service voices suck). But, knowing that I might be encouraging others to feel better about themselves makes me feel better about it, as well as less self conscious. So, thank you for including that story, Jamie! Now, maybe I'll feel more confident in wearing them.
I feel this hardcore and the amount of transphobic people in this town? Make me want death. I SHOULD KNOW I INTERNALLY HATE MYSELF FOR EVEN BEING ME.
It’s so hard paving the way, but yeah, it does help other people. There’s no telling how many folks have seen your pins and felt inspired.
❤️❤️❤️❤️
Be confident and believe you can do anything and you will see greatness
My friend made me pronoun bracelets because I'm genderfluid. I can choose whichever one(s) make me feel good, which notifirs my buddies about it my pronouns. It's absolutely terrifying wearing my they/them and he/him ones in public.
I'm not out to my parents (I'm nonbinary and AFAB) and yesterday my mom commented on my outfit and said "You look really androgynous, and that outfit really minimizes your chest. It suits you." I was so happy I could have cried.
That's my trans joy story.
I came out to my mom over a vacation to see my partner, and she was generally supportive. When we got back, she ended up telling my step dad. He stood me up and hugged me and told me he loved and supported me and was proud to be my dad no matter who I am and it warms my heart to think of that
Positive trans story: So me and my friend were part of our city's Pride Parade recently. After we walked the parade (which was a ton of fun btw, loved seeing everyone) we decided to go to a nearby mall for a couple hours. SInce we went there directly from the parade we were both wearing a ton of pride gear. My friend had on a pride t shirt with rainbow suspenders and a pride baseball cap that they put all of their pride pins on. I was wearing my binder with a fishnet shirt over it, rainbow suspenders to match my friend, my pronoun pin and rainbow long socks. While we were walking around the mall several people wished us a happy pride. Then we sat at the food court for a bit and a couple of young teens approached us and told us they liked our outfits and one of them showed us the trans pin on his hat and how me and him were wearing matching pronoun pins. It was really cool to run into others in the wild like that.
When you talk about how being recognized and accepted for who you are, it makes me think of how those of us who are cis always had that. I don't think I can really comprehend how it would feel.
Well, maybe a little. I hid my sexuality for 5 or 6 decades and it was a relief to finally come out and find that people would accept it, and find friends who have the same orientation
It's like being called a tuna all your life even though you are a salmon
@@Schnort when I was young and feeling confused/ashamed about my attraction to men, I can remember telling myself that I knew in spite of all that that I was male, in spite of the "wrong" attraction. That gave me some comfort. There's self-affirmation in having that cisgender wholeness. If I take that feeling and imagine NOT having it, I think I can imagine what trans feels like, at least a little, although I don't presume i can ever really know.
@@barrylangille3523 yeah, it's not really something you can truly understand unless you have felt it. That shouldn't undermine your own struggles though. Take care and have a nice day :]
@@Schnort thanks!
I can't imagine having to hide sick a large part of myself for 50-60 years. I'm so glad you can finally be yourself and feel free to feel free to love. As a cis het I will never understand hiding that part of myself. In a perfect world nobody will have to hide who they are on the inside and who they love (as long as it's consentual).
Because of his videos I was able to figure out my true identity, and that means so much to me. Thank you so much Jamie!! 💛💛
Awwweee
Would you feel comfortable telling us what you found out you were? It's OK if you don't, but I'm curious to know what he helped you with.
Same!
@@Lernyd It's totally fine! At first I had thought that I was a trans man, which is actually how I found his channel in the first place. Later I identified as nonbinary. Over time I have come to find out that I'm actually genderfluid! Since I don't have a supportive family, or much support with friends, having this channel to go to for support and comfort was huge for me. I will forever be thankfull to Jamie who has helped me become the person I am today.💛💛💛
@@crispybread I'm sorry to hear that your family and friends don't accept you, but there are thousands of people on the Internet who will. I hope they learn to accept you soon :)
I’m trans (genderqueer) and I really want to use the name Ashton. However, my partners name is Ashtyn and I feel it would complicate things. I told them about this, and though they said it would be fine, they’ve always been one to make sure everyone was happy over themself.
One day, I wasn’t paying attention and they were trying to call me using the name I use right now (Sox) and when that didn’t work, they called me Ashton.
Though I hid it fairly well then, that gave me such a rush of euphoria, and I’m so happy that they though to use that name, as it may allow me to use it in the future.
I like when you find the right name like for me it was a weird way because I was trying to think of names and I looked at a brick and thought that sounds like a cool names let’s put it on the maybe list I’m agender by the way and when I got people starting to use it it gave me euphoria so I think it’s the right name
Not gay couples, but I had friends called Pascale and Pascal... Alexander and Alexandra... It happens 😉
@@dangerousboop Brick is such a cool name, like genuinely.
I knew a couple who were both named Michelle -- they asked people to pronounced it "Mee-shell" for one of them & "My-shell" for the other. Just a thought...
My wife and I went to Friendsgiving with friends we met during quarantine on Discord a week ago. When we went around the table giving our names, screen names, and what we are thankful for, I thanked them all for supporting me through my transition & for being there for me. 🥰🖤 Not gonna lie, I almost cried.
Here's my wholesome trans story ! My name is changed in my university's system but not on the attendance lists yet. So when the list went around, I just crossed my deadname and wrote my chosen name and that I had changed it. The next class, I saw that the professor had put some white-out on it and written my name so that other people couldn't read my deadname and that made my day.
You helped me find my gender, thank you Jamie
I am in a conservative church and i was afraid of coming out to church leadership, but they’re so supportive and keep calling me my chosen name (Atlas). Im honestly surprised how many people catch themselves and then say “sorry, THEY...”
Also loved all the stories shared!!!
I love your name! Congratulations
Positive trans story (my wife's not mine): A few weeks ago, my wife was coming back by train after a week at her family, who, after two years, is starting to realize they can't keep deadnaming her and are slowly starting to try. Still, she was mentally exhausted, she knew I was at home in a similar state, and she had taken both our dogs along with her. The dogs love being places other than home, they just don't like the travelling part, so they were being a bit fussy in their carrier. My wife does not always pass, and she wasn't trying that day because she wouldn't be able to deal with the disappointment of being misgendered.
She gets on her first of several long trains, already looking disheveled from running for the train and dragging 7 kilo of wobbly dog carrier. The only seats available are in a carriage with a group of people who had half a liquor store with them, as well as several pieces of glassware to go with it (pint glasses, shot glasses, the works). They were already drunk, and obviously intending to get drunker. Not that uncommon in Germany on the weekend, but generally a recipe for very unpleasant travel. Still, the alternative was standing up for literal hours, so she shuffled in, duffel bag on her back, leashes stuffed under her arm, trying not to dislocate her wrist as she hauled the carrier through the walkway. The drunk party notices her, and realize their merrymaking is blocking the way. People without luggage can barely, maybe, squeeze by, my wife definitely can't.
A medium-drunk member of this gang, bucking all expectations and traditions, tells his companions to sit down in their seats for a moment and "let that lady through, she's already got two dogs, she doesn't need to deal with you lot as well". Cue my wife taking a moment to realize she is the only one in the carriage with dogs of any kind, and the guy means her. Anyhow, she passes them by and gets to her seat without anyone in the carriage, sober or otherwise, trying to tell this helpful gentleman that anything he said might be inaccurate. (And, yes, you argue with day-drunk people on German trains. It's part of the whole experience.) Four hours later, she arrived home still giddy that total strangers who she didn't even talk to recognized she was a woman.
This one gave me happy tears. Thanks to you & your wife!
Aww I love this one!
My grandmother accidentally misgenders me a lot and she says that she feels so bad
I came out at school this year and they changed my name in the system. And one time my math teacher corrected another student who accidentally misgendered me.
My lab partner in chem went out of her way to apologize for misgendering and deadnaming me
My friends at school always use the right pronouns which is so nice because most people just don't use pronouns for me at all (which makes me upset)
My mom has done research about name changes and stuff like that and found out that in my state you can put your chosen name on your driver's license
I confused an oldish lady at my school the other day and she called me they
When I did my placement in an ergo therapy praxis I was sitting in the rest room with another person of the staff and all of a sudden she looks at me and asks: What are your pronouns? And I told her that I use she/her (in germany) but in English they/them and she then tells me that one of her friends is nonbinary as well and we had a whole chat about lgbtq and normalizing asking for pronouns. I was so happy :D
Ayyy, another German enby!
wow me too
waaaah that's so wholesome! I am under the impression gender neutral pronouns in germany are harder for no reason.
@@danone2414 Yes they are
@@danone2414 its harder because we have no neutral one
An addition:
A few weeks ago I came out to all the people live with at college. I decided I felt close enough with them to share that part of myself. They were all extremely supportive and happy for me and it felt great. We went to bed right after that because it was late, but when I woke up the next morning my door was covered in post-it notes with all sorts of affirming things and messages of support. I could barely contain myself. And to top it all off, that day the girls that I live with added me to their all girls groupchat!
One of my nephews was a toddler when I came out. He was so excited to learn how to spell my new name and learn how “the doctors fixed me”. It was probably the most heartwarming event I can remember in my recent past. Unfortunately, his transphobic father(divorced to my sister now) and even my sister ran some negative ideas on my transition. We’ve always had a tough relationship. By the time he entered grade school, I was “faking and not a real boy”. My heart still aches at the memory, but I know it wasn’t him. It was someone who taught him that negative outlook. Even so, no one can take away that memory of a little kid genuinely trying to know more about his uncle. I’ll never forget how it was the first physical proof I had that children are accepting. Adults teach hate. Kids are not born hateful. Love your kids. Love your family. Reflect light, deflect hate. Love you all. Andy
This is very inspirational and really affirmational for me, I’m not currently out to my father as Agender
In the same position and love the positive trans videos, feels so good seeing people being loved and accepted ^^
you can do it! :)
It's certainly brightening my day. I'm both asexual and agender, though I only recently realized the agender bit, and am in the agender closet but not the ace one. Trans positivity is hitting all the rights notes for me at the moment because the terfs have been at it again and are claiming the increase in asexual awareness is a result of the use of puberty blockers for trans kids. Also very much aware we fall under the trans umbrella so multiple points of relevance. All in all much goodness to be had here.
Edited because "weirdly cool" could hit like I was calling trans postitivity being cool weird . Trans positivity is always cool.
Also, in before someone points out aces come out of the deck 😛
@@Toni-lo9ms hi I’m aromantic asexual agender and I go by the name brick because I like it
Trans positivity story: I went into a bookshop over the summer and one lf the people working there said, “Hey!“ very excitedly and when i turned around they said, “OH, my mistake, you look like a guy who comes in here all the time“ as an afab agender person this is one of the few times people have read me as male and i was so happy 🔥🔥🔥
The other day I overheard my brother ask my mum why she keeps calling me Jasper. she explained that Im a boy not a girl and that he has a big brother now. I didn’t expect anything to come of it given he’s young and I didn’t think he would really get it, but after their conversation he walked into my room, gave me a hug and said “hi Jasper”. I almost started happy crying. He’s been using my name ever since💗 I love my brother
I recently told my mum that I was non-binary and about my preferred name. she sorta already knew I was non-binary because I have fake friends who told their parents. at home we speak Portuguese because my family is from Portugal and there is no gender neutral terms or pronouns in Portuguese, so my mum has managed to find nicknames which don't neccerserally sound gendered or change my old ones to masculine. its really wholesome seeing her try to get everything correct
Do you have some examples you feel comfortable sharing? I am planning on soon coming out as non-binary and am currently running into the same problem with Italian.
Day thirty-seven of telling this amazing pillar of confidence and hope for those of us who don’t have as many allies how great he is. Remember to take breaks and much love ❤️
thanks temmie
imagine growing up in a loving environment
Oh god I truly wish
:')
One can only imagine
Ikr
woah now, let's keep our transition goals realistic
positive trans stories: asked my dad to pick my middle name when i legally changed it since he wasn't there for the first naming of me, and he sent back like a proper letter with his decision, it was very cute and sweet and i'm sure it's in my Saved Things box.
came out to my aunt and uncle on my mom's side and was very nervous (my mom had been less supportive in life and her widower continues this). asked for her advice on how or whether to come out to my grandpa as i 1) didn't want to upset him after he already lost his daughter, and 2) didn't want to risk losing a relationship with him. aunt told me she'd handle it and by golly she did, she did the work for me on that entire side of the family. ♥
on the topic of grandpa, he's a lifelong tinkerer, and would always give mom and me little knick-knacks he'd touched up when we visited, little shelves for tiny toys and figurines, very cute. last time i was out, first time since visiting post-top surgery, he gave me a pocket watch he'd fixed up. my grandpa's a man of few words, and that pocket watch just said everything to me. i'll treasure it forever.
The best thing is when a guy calls me "boss". It makes my day 10 times better
I'm in the process of discovering my gender, and I've changed a lot over the past few years. I'm in my second year of college, and since highschool, I've cut my hair and look super different. Every time that I can, I go back to visit my highschool theatre department because the people there are amazing. Every time, I get at least one student who knew me in highschool ask me my pronouns/name/etc. Usually I have to say 'I'm not sure, I think just any pronouns and my given name' and.... and they're so accepting of it, but still ask the next time they see me just in case. It's really so so nice, and as a nice added bonus, every time I go I meet at least one or two new theatre kids who are trans/non-binary and its so great to see these kids thriving and living their best life and being so accepted.
I’m in high school in the uk and I do drama and will ask other peoples pronouns to make them feel accepted and in my drama class we have me and another person that I know of being outside the binary spectrum me being agender and going by he/they and another person who is a Demi-girl who goes by she/they
Ngl, I've been feeling shitty in my identity today, but this seriously helps. I plan on finally doing something that I've wanted to do for years. I'm going to be embroidering my old, black sweat shirt with "1969" in rainbow. Not only would it be my very first piece of LGBTQ+ clothing, it would be overcoming my huge fear of needles that I have from trauma. It'll help me be more proud in my identity and also be a form of exposure therapy. This helps me feel motivated to do something scary and good for me today. Tysm.
Having someone call you “Wee Lad” in Dundee is a close second to “Mate” in Greggs
The uni one made me remember - one of my close friends at uni is trans. We share two classes. In the first one, the teacher went through the class and asked every student for preferred name and legal last name (to "make sure her list was correct"), and in the other one he went up before class to the teacher and told the teacher. Both have used the correct name and pronouns for him every time ~
Positive trans story! I'm nonbinary (transmasc) and on my school's debate team. We had a lecture about feminism to prepare us for regular training as it's a pretty common topic in the world of debates, and I accidentally interrupted one of my female teammates while she was asking a question. The coach stopped to tell me that as a man (!!!!!!!!), it was bad form to talk over a woman, especially in the context of a debate about feminism as it'd leave a bad taste in the judge's mouth.
I corrected our coach and told him I wasn't a man, and he apologized, but I remember feeling so euphoric because it was the first time I'd been able to pass as male with my voice and appearance. Our debate team is a really accepting place too- asks for pronouns, always treats queer issues with respect, but that was one of the times I felt happiest there. Coach Kenny if you're reading this, I'd die for you.
YEAAAAAA TRANS PEOPLE‼️we are literally so cool
My old Spanish teacher is a lesbian and I, a trans women, got super hyped about this because I felt like she'd be a lot more supportive of me than most teachers, so I asked my group of friends if I should come out to her and they all said yes. So then it was after the end of the day and I went to her classroom with my friends and I have really nervous, I wasn't sure if it was a good idea and I was kind of panicking, so my friend, who is actually the only person in our group who isn't LGBTQ+ Went into the class with me and introduced me because I was too scared, then she proceeded to use the correct pronouns and my preferred name and I almost cried.
Here’s a happy thing: I finally got my name legally changed! I was very lucky to get it through VLP (volunteer lawyers project) who helped me with a lot of the filing and even filed for a fee waiver for me. I still have to go through all the paperwork for changing everything else (bank, doctors, insurance, etc.) but I got the email from the lawyer representing me past midnight a few days ago and I ran to wake up my grandmother to tell her because I was so excited and happy.
I actually also became friends with one of my enby friends because they had backpack pins. I'm still not brave enough to do that. Pride flag bracelets are more subtle. I opt for those :)
I’m glad I found this channel :D my parents keep dead naming me, and it makes me happy to see people being so accepting to others :)
You deserve that too! Hope your situation improoves!
Is Theo your chosen name? If so: Hi Theo, nice name.
I’m sorry, I hope they’ll start to use your chosen name
@@SIC647 hi! Thank you :D
We're not just supporting of /others/; we're supportive of you, too, Theo!
I recently came out as Trans to the teachers at school and for a conservative county I live in they were really supportive! I was so happy and corrected my name on the attendance charts. I then remembered last year when I said I go by a different name, they wrote it down, but didnt change it on the attendance sheets(so anytime a substitute came around my deadname would be said). This year, they changed it on the sheets! I was so happy when a substitute said my chosen name.
I had top surgery over two years ago, and I'm still periodically overwhelmed with gratitude to not need a binder. Also, I still have to mentally check of bras/binders from my packing list when I go on trips.
My happy trans moment is when I was in photography club after school. The teacher gets us to write down our names on a piece of paper every week. I was logging onto the computer so I asked my friend to write my name down and they went over and wrote down my chosen name! I didn’t know but when the teacher did the register he said “is Kit here??” And I was so happy
Having to come out as trans to a childhood friend I haven't seen in years. She then says "oh...yeah nah I see it now. That just makes sence" and I died
Edit: wait does Jamie have a septum piercing?!
That happened to me too 😳
Yeah, I believe he got his septum piercing a couple of weeks ago, he mentioned it in a video
Around a year ago, my auntie told me that with my mask on a looked like a boy, and then quickly said that that was probably not something I wanted to hear.
Actually, it was exactly what I wanted to hear, and gave me so much euphoria.
People accidentally correctly gendering me is hilarious and awesome. I love it.
this makes me remember something that happened last week. We had a guest choir leader and I immediately clocked the rainbow shoelaces and bag strap, but of course being the UK supporters of the NHS now also uses the rainbow (and of course, a person can just like rainbows) but saw the he/them pronoun pin badge and got so happy! I'm very cis, but ace and wear the black ring
Did I saw anything? Of course not I'm English and a socially anxious mess
What does the black ring mean? Does it has to do with being ace? ( I'm not sure if that is even a correct sentence, I'm German, but I hope you get it)
@@schokoloko2092 yeah its an ace thing I think from the aven forums originally.
Idea is you wear a black ring on the middle finger on your right hand so other aces know that you are ace. Obviously not compulsory but a thing.
If you're aromantic you can wear a white ring on the middle finger of your left hand
This made me almost cry. I wish to have moments like these some day too, but I am still mostly in the closet, especially since i am not sure if I'm non binary or a transguy. I kinda feel like both is true, since what i feel mor comfy with changes sometimes. And this uncertainty makes me scared to come out. Also that I have bad social anxiety and I know a lot of people will make fun of me in school and stuff (I am also like... very feminine. I love skirts and dresses even though I am more boyish genderwise... And nobody would take me seriously if I came out, I believe)
Honestly, about being feminine and having a masculine gender, I can relate. I'm (mostly) out at school, but there are a lot of people who think I'm "just pretending to be trans to be cool" because I wear earringsand am open about how I feel. Like bro, just because I have fashion sense and feelings doesn't make me less of a man than you are :| Now for advice time: While it can be tempting to pretend to be more masculine presentation-wise, it's probably not a good idea to hide that--if people only respect your gender because you conform to their standards of it, they're probably not very good people to be friends with. And about no one taking you seriously, find a group of people who will, even if it's just one or two people. I have GAD and it's really hard to speak up for myself, so it's nice to have friends who will. I know this is just random commiserating/advice from a stranger on the internet, but I hope this at least makes your day a little better. Remember, you're not alone!
I'm about to turn 30 & only recently came out to a few people as a nonbinary transmasculine person. Sometimes I feel more comfortable being perceived as a guy, sometimes I feel more comfortable being femme AF but still recoiling if I get called "a woman" or "miss".
I also was scared to come out because I wasn't sure EXACTLY what I was. I was aware that my love of makeup/jewelry might make people think I'm an attention-seeker... But until I came out, I actually didn't know how fulfilling being seen as a guy would feel? For reference, my boyfriend is the only person I'm 110% out to. Some people know I'm on a journey & some people know I'm some kind of not-a-female. But him... He was the first one to use my pronouns & help me test the waters, because like... After 30 years of being called "she", even if you feel like you aren't a woman, it still feels more normal than "he"?
I strongly encourage experimenting. So much of gender is what happens in our head that it can be hard to know how we feel about a pronoun/name or expression or a situation until we're acting on it... If you start in a controlled environment, you get to learn how it feels. You get to collect data. Even if it's just going by a new name/as a "he" online or by, IDK, editing photos/creating a character in a videogame to try new things with your appearance. Even if you change your mind or decide something doesn't feel right, at least you know!
Anyway, sorry for the ramble. I was up half the fkn night thinking about how after a lifetime of questioning, a year of intense struggles, & five months of being out? I've finally started to experience some gender euphoria... Even though I'm not perfectly sure of myself. And I thought I'd relay what's helped me because maybe it would help you. 💕
[If you don't watch them already, I really love Ashton Daniel & Boy Camryn as femme/gender-nonconforming trans guys! It was super validating to see them put on makeup & talk about their relationship to femininity.]
@@ZijnShayatanica Congrats on coming out! That's really good advice too.
@@argoxnautilus Aaaaah, thank you!! I feel kinda fkn old in the online trans community, not gonna lie, but... BETTER LATE THAN NEVER.
And yeah, I kind of tried to get creative, lolol. It got to a point earlier this year where I was living in this frustrating echo chamber & I realized... I was going to be miserable if I didn't get out of my head. Seeing how it felt to have my feelings mirrored back at me from the outside changed SO MUCH! It seems obvious, but it really isn't when you're feeling a lot of shame/uncertainty.
Yeah, I struggle with whether I'm a full blown trans-man or not too, and although at the moment I've been more comfortable with calling myself non-binary, I Also think I might be a demiboy. It's really weird to figure out, but I'm keeping my hopes up for all of us!
This comment section is so wholesome with short little anecdotes, let me add my own haha - little disclaimer, I'm not trans, but I am pansexual and had been open about that with my fmily ever since I figured it out.
I was invited to my cousins wedding and while I was very excited to go, I was also worried because my unlce was alsways very homophobic and just generally scary towards me whenever I intereacted with him. So imagien my surprise when I went to the wedding and this man just asked me if I had celebrated Pride and how my June was - all these nice things and just positive vibes! Turns out, his son, my other cousin, came out as Bisexual to him and so my uncle did his own research and just stopped being a homophobic ass, but is now actually a very pleasant and fun guy to be around of! I even got invited to stay at their place for next June so I can go to Pride with my Cousin
I really needed this after the terrible Dr appointment I had last night, coming out as trans has been the hardest coming out I've done. This made me happy cry.
Something I love, is my dad being so proud of himself for standing up for the community in his line of work. He comes home and tells me all about how I helped him learn how to correctly address the transition topic with people and that what he had learnt from me helped someone else
i had the tiniest but extremely uplifting moment recently
i had reconnected with a friend whom i knew before coming out as trans, and we were talking a few days ago (in german) and she used the masculine form of ‘dear’ for me and it was such a tiny but incredibly joyful thing.
for once a win for such a gendered language lmao
Positive trans story: when I first came out to my cousin I was worried about how he’d react. But then when we were playing tag in the pool later that day he pulled me in front of him and said “don’t tag me, tag him!” He used my correct pronouns not even thirty minutes after I came out without even having to think about it. It was a really good feeling.
Kinda positive trans story Ig:
I remember never thinking I’d be referred to correctly by any teacher because whenever I asked it was a little note in the bottom of a page in my workbook and I’d ask them to check it at some point. I remember the first teacher that responded to it said “I can use They/Them (I found out awhile after that I don’t use any prns btw) but I can’t use your preferred name if it hasn’t been legally changed. :(“ I remember feeling so bummed out about that but despite it being the rule, I kept asking teachers anyway and some other trans people I knew were coming out to their teachers as well. I knew it was against the rules but I literally didn’t care. Those rules were wrong. And the next year I came back they changed the rule so that people can use their preferred name and pronouns (or lack there of) without having to ask again :) The first time I heard my preferred name on the register I was so happy it was ridiculous. And since then I realised that I don’t see the point in being closeted to anyone in my school so i’m very out now :))
Sorry if that wasn’t positive or if it was confusing aha
My positive trans story: So I used to sleep over at my ex-friend's house on Saturdays. That means I'd spend the night Saturday, wake up on Sunday, and they'd go to church (I'm not religious so they'd leave me behind). When they got out of church they used to take me to their after church lunch with another family they were friends with. The other family had this boy who was 8; the youngest there. The boy and I got along really well because 1) I'm a closeted transmasc person so me and him were the only boys at the table (I understood his displeasure for the random, boring girly talk lol), 2) I was the only person who listened to anything he had to say (due to the others viewing him as "small child" and "only boy"), and 3) we both have ADHD and get bored af sitting at a table with nothing to do. So we would joke around, cause antics (I would try and stop him from taking it too far), and all around just vibe with each other. The seventh time I came to this weekly lunch, the boy looks at me after a while and says "the first time I saw you, I thought you were a boy" and I almost said "thank you" but then I was like "WAIT! I can't say that!". I was so happy that he thought of me as a boy for even a little while and I tried to fight back my smile in that moment. After hiding my smile by just giggling a little I asked him why he thought I was a boy (my hair goes down to my butt so I don't usually get people gendering me correctly on accident). He goes "because you were wearing boy clothes" and I almost didn't want to say anything but I knew I couldn't let him have that mindset forever so I just said "well girls can wear boy clothes too" and he goes "no they can't" and I go "yes they can. They're just clothes" and he looked off as if he pondered this for a moment but he never responded. I'm glad his misconception of clothing let him think of me as a boy for a small amount of time but I hope his opinions have broadened since then. Shoutout to that kid though, he gave me so much gender euphoria and he has to put up with those other people (my ex-friend and her sister are really awful people and I feel bad every day knowing that poor kid has to meet with them once a week).
And my less positive but still positive-ish trans story: I live with my very homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist, fat-phobic, misogynistic, toxic masculinity, etc., etc., etc. dad and his garbage thoughts have rubbed off onto my younger brother with the help of my brother's very homophobic, Christian friend (and ironically the most gay person I've ever seen (even if he'll never admit it to anyone HE'S STILL GAY AND I KNOW IT!!)). I'm bisexual and trans (either FtM or just some form of transmasc idk yet) so my life is ✨great✨ (in case someone reads this and doesn't understand I'm being sarcastic). Being viewed as a woman in a sexist household while simultaneously being transmasc is like a double-kill. Anyway I'm very depressed with the fact that I have to wait until I move to come out and that when that happens, I will probably lose most of my friends and family. HOWEVER, my older brother who usually doesn't share his thoughts on like....anything, made an actually funny, non-offensive joke about somebody being non-binary.........like :0 Then just today, he mentioned his male coworker's HUSBAND and didn't say anything rude or offensive at all. And I know that's like a really low bar but what that means is that my older brother isn't homophobic or transphobic (or if he is, it's based more on a lack of knowledge rather than hating simply people who are different like it is for my dad). That means I MIGHT ACTUALLY GET TO KEEP MY BROTHER IN MY LIFE!! Which just makes me so incredibly happy because the thought of not having my brothers in my life makes me so upset.
So yeah, those are the positive trans-related things that happened in my life. Thanks for reading : )
Thank you for sharing your story! I'm nonbinary (they/them) and your story made me feel less alone. I hope your life will improve, especially after you move out. And all the best with your brother!
These stories made my day 🥰
I really like the way you write
@@hyalophora 🥺🥺 awwww thanks!!! I really appreciate that! I try to make things clear and concise so nobody's confused but people normally just tell me I'm too wordy. It's nice to hear that somebody actually likes how I write :, )
@@lees_act I'm really glad!! :D
I'm not crying, you're crying 😭 so much cuteness
I've been reading through the comments on and off most of this evening, and it's wonderful to see such a supportive community! Here, I'll share a few positive trans moments myself:
At the start of the new school year, i was looking around at people, and i saw someone with a they/them pin, so i knew i had to go say hi, especially since they never would have known I'm trans (was very agab-presenting at that point), so i basically went and sat next to them and said 'hey, nice pin... uhhh me too!' They were so happy to find another queer person (we're also both ace and on the aro spectrum), and now they're one of my best friends! I feel kinda bad i know their deadname cause of legal stuff, but i always make sure i think of them as their real name, Bee. We share so many queer memes, and i always have so much fun hanging out with them. Gay brings friends together, people! 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️
Next, i went on holiday, and while walking around, so many people referred to me in a masc way (I'm enby, but transmasc so yay), especially the one time i was in shorts and sunglasses, and i temporarily dyed the tips of my hair bright green. I got called boy and brother so many times, and i wasn't even wearing a hoodie!
Also, my parents are getting way better at using my pronouns, and my friends are pretty much always getting it right, and correcting others :)
Now, I'm off to make more picrews (which, by the way, I'm now actually able to look like one i made previously that i really liked, and the euphoria is reallll) (don't give up on your dreams, you can do it everyone!)
Peace out!
Omg I'd almost forgotten i commented here but update!!
Everyone at work always calls me by my actual name and he/him, which is super cool
Because yeah turns out I'm a demiboy, but like heavily masc-leaning so i just use he/him
Oh and the friend i mentioned? We're now boyfriends because he goes by he/him too, and i love him so much, can't wait to call him my husband one day :)
when I started school this year, some teachers had like a "anything I need to know about you?" and I typed that I go by my chosen name and when I came back from my quarantine, most of them already knew my name and I didn't have to awkwardly tell them. it was great :)
Positive Story: After work one day, I was just waiting for the bus home and a kid comes up to me (maybe 20-ish?) and said he liked my jacket. It was my leather jacket from my university program that I had decorated with trans and ace pride flag patches. He told me he was trans too, starting T next week and looking for a job that would respect him, then asked if I would be a reference for him at my workplace. Even though I had never met him or knew his name, I agreed. Because everyone deserves to work somewhere that will respect them. The smile on his face was the highlight of my week.
I just came out to my little brothers, and one of them said, " [Deadname] is kind of a girls' name... I'll call you Alex." Not my name, but I'm so happy they accepted me 😭😭😭
Was so confused when you announced the sponser as being *the* Mastercard. Really happy about what you went on to say, though. That True Name system is a lifesaver. Makes such a massive difference to not have to see your deadname everytime you pull out your card. I'm so glad this system will be around to help people who can make use of it. Would definitely love to see Mastercard return as a sponser for you, cos as many people as possible should be aware this exists.
Best moment of my life being a trans male: I was sitting in form and we had a substitute form tutor (I'm British btw). And for a bit of context, I was out to like 3 people, being my close friend, my parents and my school counsellor and my school counsellor told me that the teachers would call me Chris! So I was in form and the sub read my name out and the class went silent, everyone was confused, so I was forced to come out as trans. And since that day, I've been accepted at school but we still ain't accepted fully at home but it's progress!
I'm not British, what is form?
@@Schnort It's what you go when school starts for like 15-20 minutes to get registered and shit like that! 👍
I'm using the same nickname, because I love English but hate my name in it.
High five, Brother!
The first time I went out on a tinder date while presenting male, we were paying our bill at the bar and the bartender said "will that be everything for you boys?". I was only about a month on T at the time and it just really sticks out to me as one of those super affirming moments that makes me smile when I remember it.
The simple act of using people's preffered pronouns or names could literally save a life; you never know who it might be... it could be a loved one, a student, a class mate, a friend, a workmate, or a stranger in the street... and I just don't understand why some people will go out of their way to be spiteful in actively misgender or deadname someone they claim to love. Like they think they're proving a point, idek, but how often doing that leads to tragedy, whether it's a loss of a life or that person living their life under a shadow of shame and fear.
I wish I could adopt every single one of you who has a family who can't appreciate the gift they have of having you in their lives. Take gentle care of yourselves, you all deserve it. 💜🏳️⚧️🏳️🌈
From a mother who lost her afab trans son to suicide, thank you SO much for the reminder!
I don't want to cry...
As a trans guy, Thank You
I came out earlier this year and my brother has been supportive of me the entire time, he calls me his sibling, corrects my parents when they accidentally use the wrong pronouns. He’s the best💛
I’m currently questioning my gender and watching your videos makes me feel really secure, thank you so much!
I must write this one in a separate comment: I live in Switzerland, where we have compulsory military service for cis-men and I haven’t started HRT yet. I went to a so called „orientation day“ where they told us what our options were and I went into that really scared of rejection and being forced into the „male role“ but when I got to speak to one of the organizers he told me from next year on it was going to be very easy for me to just change my gender marker on my ID-card and I was instantly filled with relief. Later in the day some of the straightest kids ever who knew me from having seen me, asked me what my name was and I explained my whole situation and told them my chosen name and they simply went „oh ok, nice“.