6 Signs You've Been Emotionally Abused
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- čas přidán 19. 06. 2024
- In this video, we're going to discuss emotional abuse, also known as emotional trauma syndrome (Cptsd). Emotional abuse can be described as a repeated experience of emotional assault that causes significant emotional damage.
If you're experiencing any of the following symptoms, it might be evidence that you're suffering from emotional abuse: intense anxiety, depression, hopelessness, hypersensitivity to criticism, self-blame, difficulties concentrating, panic attacks, insomnia, irritability, and physical health problems. If you think you may be in an abusive relationship, it's important to reach out for help!
Complex post-traumatic stress disorder (complex PTSD, sometimes abbreviated to c-PTSD or CPTSD) is a condition where you experience some symptoms of PTSD along with some additional symptoms, such as: difficulty controlling your emotions. feeling very angry or distrustful towards the world.
Writer: Daila Ayala
Script editor: Rida Batool
Script manager: Kelly Soong
Narrator :Amanda Silvera ( / amandasilvera )
Animator: Naphia @naphia
CZcams Manager: Cindy Cheong
Who would you like us to interview on our ask an expert series?
Dr. Ramani!
Sasha Hamdani MD
Anyone
Prince EA😱🙏🙏PLEASE
Dr. Caroline Leaf
"The wound is not my fault, but the healing is my responsibility." Marianne Williamson
Man deep
Painfully true, good qoute
I was bullied by a guy in high school, it affected me emotionally & made me an introvèrt & my academic performance declined. I am in college, now & the effect is still there.😪
@@Horizon429 Oh I'm so sorry :(
Marianne Williamson 2024!! She's running for president in the US!
This hits WAY to close to home. The worst part about being abused in any way, is you don't always know its abuse when it's happening. And it's so confusing.
@Λ DΛY ΛƬ DЦƧK
Are you feeling defensive, can't meet their standards and feel like you are not able to do anything right only in their opinions?
You are the victim, it's okay to defend yourself, be yourself and not be obligated to anyone else. Especially when they have no morals and personal standards for themselves or their behavior and they could care less about you.
Very much agreed! I remember as a kid learning about these different types of abuses but not recognizing at the moment that I was in the middle of any of them at that time. It took becoming an adult and seeing more normal families and how they function to realize how different my own home and upbringing were, and then even more time to come to accept that there was no easy way to change that without a lot of work on myself and without leaving that environment.
I get what you mean. I lived with a mom who was sweet and nice most of the time, but would get mean and delusional when she wasn't on her depression medication. I only somewhat recently learned that what she did to me, was emotional abuse. And sometimes I wonder if I'm just overreacting, like maybe her actions weren't that bad. Then I remember how I felt, and I remember some of the long-term issues I have. Watching this video reconfirmed it in a way.
Usually because you're young and naive and don't know any better, and the abuser and their enablers make you feel like it's your fault and that there's nothing that can be done about it.
So true. Took me years to figure it out and now I’ve just sent this video to my mum.
"There are wounds that never show on the body that are deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds." - Laurell K. Hamilton
Damn. What book was that?
I actually started to tear up during this, and I just remembered a lot of my childhood that I blocked from my memory
Maybe you should go for therapy.
I saw an old Twilight Zone, where a man got his wish to relive his childhood, then realizing it was pure Hell. His GF said: "We remember the good." But my 10 y-o self resolved to remember every rotten thing that ever happened to me, so I would never make the same mistake, given the opportunity.
ahh me too
I’m sorry man I hope your happy and healing got any advice how to cope with emotional abuse ?
same
0:00 Intro
0:39 Kingdom of Isolation
1:25 Reign of Worthlessness
1:58 Fortness of Avoidance
2:34 Blame Game
3:12 Battle of Outburst
3:57 Conceal don't Feel
4:52 Outro
TYANK U😭
*fortress
@@YtWuff same. I guess I should begin to have ONS and never ever again begin a new relationship
@@YtWuff one night stand😅 I often had the possibility, but I always said no because I want a relationship, but yeah, love sucks so maybe I should change that
A kingdom of isolation, and it looks like… IM THE QUEEN :0
Sometimes words do hurt people more than any physical abuse-
As someone who experienced both, I fully agree. Hope everyone gets out of their toxic environment ❤
words are more harmful and damaging than bullets
@@arimarezaee7455 man what have you been through 😭
You got that right. I was helping my mother. Taking care of her. But she was still criticizing and judging me like crazy.
Absolutely!
As someone who has been & somehow still is being emotionally & mentally abused, I can relate to this.
*hugs*
Sorry that you're going through mental and emotional abuse. We'd like to ask, were you able to find help? Do you have the right resources such as mental health professionals to help you?
@@ficmatagaea7813 Thx
@hhyh bruh, try living MY LIFE then you can TALK
@@Psych2go Yes I did find one way or another to cope with it & to go through the pain and agony, But also maintaining a somewhat stable mind set.
Thx 4 asking & caring ❤
Also ps.
Your videos REALLY helped me find flaws in me that I never thought I had and that helps A LOT.
I was raised by narcissists who taught me to plow through my inner feelings to enable their behaviors to please them. Never was never educated about this personality disorder and enabled my personal relationships not knowing any better. I'm finally in a good place after a decade of healing myself.
Good for you and congratulations.
that's really nice. :)
I wss raised by overtly-controlling parents, since childhood. After I left my home during college, the effect started showing & I am unable to còpe with many situations.
please share how you healed this. I feel like I constantly bring out the worst in everyone around me
Same. Wishing you all the best!
Tbh as a dude, I used to struggle with accepting vulnerability because I’d get backlash whenever I did. My message to others struggling with trying to look ‘strong’ by avoiding feelings is that you’re much braver than you think you are for even accepting you’re struggling in the first place; you’re confronting something you’ve been taught to avoid, and that takes a lot of courage.
Thank you. Beautifully said.
Im so glad you’re getting in tone with your feelings!’
Men are also hurt by toxic masculinity and this is a good example of how
Cry, yell, punch a wall, lean on a shoulder, just be vulnerable.
I'm not a guy, but I'd rather anyone show their vulnerability since I get yelled at for it myself, just because it annoys my parent.
So please, to anyone- feel a bit more confident and be vulnerable. You can't bottle up feelings after all! It's what makes you human. That's what my friend taught me :)
Down with gender roles! Down with gendered expectations! The only men I actually enjoy hanging out with are ones who are emotionally open and willing to express themselves. What is the point of being alive if you're being forced into a box that isn't big enough?
"Trauma is personal, it does not disappear if it is not validated. When it is ignored or invalidated, the silent screams continue internally, heard only by the one held captive. When someone enters the pain and hears the screams, healing can begin." - Danielle Bernock
Came out at exactly the right time. This is my life in conclusion.
My parents while very good parents overall. Just don't get that being unpleasant and always insulting your child can do real damage.
It got to the point where while I love them and appreciate all the things they do for me. I don't want to be in the same room as them. They just aren't pleasant for me to be around. It's unfortunate that the parents who provide everything and give me every opportunity, I have always done my utmost to avoid in every step of my life. And I do resent them for it.
I hope some of you relate. Surely I'm not alone?
Edit:
Things might improve probably not. after talking with them quite extensively I think they are beginning to understand that while arguments and insults/general uncalled for unpleasantness may be common, it's not good, just like smoking.
I hear you. My parents have provided me everything they could. Christmas presents, taking me on vacations, provided financially, etc. However, they fought a lot and the noises and such became too much. I've been more open lately about the stuff I'm doing, but my dad always shoots it down and my mom is working fulltime now (my dad is retired and I live with my parents), so being in the constant state of negativity hurts.
I'm so sorry that is happening to you🙏🏼😔
YOU ARE IMPORTANT
YOU ARE LOVED
YOU MATTER
and YOU ARE NOT WHAT OTHERS THINK OR SAY OF YOU
Believe in yourself!
I'm struggling all these years later cause I never knew this.
I believed whatever my parents said or did to me was law. They're the top of the food chain, we answer to them. But that's not the case at all.
Parents obligations are to make sure you are safe (from others and yourself), protected, healthy (mentally, spiritually, emotionally and physically)guiding you in confidence, making sure you're happy, LIVING! Amongst many other things.
Hands and objects hurt but words cut into us the worst. And because we are conditioned to look up to our parents and honour them, their words hold true meaning to us, even if they "didn't mean it" or if it was said out of anger or stress.
I don't care what it is. No one has the right to hurt another person.
I don't know your exact situation. Obviously, if it's abusive you can seek outside help or talk to someone you trust🙏🏼write down a list of things you love about yourself.
If your parents aren't building up your self love and self confidence then you need to do the work.
If you want help with this. You're welcome to dm me on Instagram.
If you want or need, we can share affirmations and one thing you love about yourself each day. I do this with another friend and I just started it with another lastnight.
It helps! To recognize your worth when no one seems to.
I'm babbling on and on.
My apologies.
What you wrote here triggered me. Except my parents were toxic for me.
Again, I'm sorry you're going through that and I'll keep you in my heart and prayers 🙏🏼🙏🏼💜🙏🏼🙏🏼
It's okay to struggle, but you're not alone in your struggle. I believe your situation WILL get better so...
same.. but for me, even when i make the smallest mistakes, the words they use... it stings so bad... and it's been going on for a while, adding the fact that I'm in a restrictive family which also stings me a lot more... i dont even dare tell them much about most of what's been happening because usually they'll just somehow find a way and turn it to me as if i am in the wrong... i wanna love them but at the same time im scared...
You re not alome
I’ve been trying to convince my father to change for years… I’m 26 and this video convinced me it’s time to never talk to my abuser again.
and don't worry about hurting their feelings. they don't have any
Wee lamb stay strong ❤
This is the best decision you have taken for yourself♥️ god help you to heal
Same with my mother.
I get hurt more emotionally than physically everyday of my life. EVERY DAY! Sometimes, I get treated like I was a punching bag, easy target or laughing stock of the entire world by everyone, even by my own family at times.
We're so sorry that you feel this way. It can be frustrating when the people in our lives, especially our loved ones, seem to be causing hurt even if it's unintentionally. We wanted to ask, have you tried speaking to a mental health professional that can help you set healthy boundaries?
@@Psych2go yes, I have been seeing a mental health professional just recently, and I'm glad I found some help.
I get the feel. gotta quit feeling like you're responsible for everyone else's comfort or whatever it is you feel responsible for that you aren't.
I know exactly how you feel. Why is it that good people have to deal with this. I dealt with those feelings through out my marriage and by my last employer. It would be nice not to feel like a pos every day.
I am truly so sorry that this is happening to you. I know the experience only too well (the way my wife has treated me in our 50 year marriage).
Please stay strong, and know that those abusers are wrong, wrong, wrong ❤️🩹
This video spoke to me and is me on all levels. Sadly, I'm always walking on eggshells and trying to please everyone before myself, I'm apologetic for everything, even when nothing is my fault. Ugh
This video triggered a lot within.
It just let's me know the work has began! And there's loads to do!
I'm learning to set boundaries and trying to love myself for the first time.
Totally easier said then done
But I got this!!!!
We got this!!!
💜🙏🏼💜
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and feelings with us. We wanted to ask, how are you doing now? How are you setting healthy boundaries and loving yourself? Do you have any strategies that you found helpful?
I feel this comment very much and I'm happy to hear that you've been working hard to set boundaries and learn to self love.
I believe that you can absolutely achieve those goals and be the best person that you already are!
We all got this! 💙💙💙💙
I hope you feel better 💖
You remind me of a friend of mine who is in a friendship with a covert narcissist. I feel like he is slipping back. I did everything I could and gave him all the tools, it's on him now.
Set boundaries, love yourself and know that not everything is your fault. You can't control how people feel but you can be kind, genuine and respectful while you deal with people. If they get upset and you checked all those boxes... then
... it's not your fault.
Wish you the best.
You definitely got this! Take your time, because years of damage need time to heal. I can very much recommend talking to a professional - it's much easier, than talking to friends or relatives. Because, it's the therapists job to listen to you, so it feels less like you're burdening someone.
Don't give up! ❤
My parents did the best they could, with what they had -- they had their own emotional baggage. But getting yelled at all the time took its toll. They realized it years later and apologized, and I'm not angry with them, but I still struggle.
1, 2, 3, and 6 are still major issues for me. *Especially* "conceal don't feel". I've been numb for long enough that I don't remember not being numb.
Mine never apologized, pray for me that i can always forgive them 😢
It's really good that they took responsibility and apologised to you love. Good luck
I'm glad emotional Abuse is being talked about more often in these videos because physical abuse happens more often because your left with marks and stuff but the entire world always forgets about the emotional standpoint of it as well. As humans we come with feelings that are always ignored or misunderstood which is a problem in the world. We look at the marks that abusers leave but never look at how it makes us feel on the inside. We are suffering not just on the outside but inside as well. So I'm happy that they talk about emotional abuse more because the society we live in today is careless and no one really cares about your feelings. Thank you so much Psych2G0 for bringing this to your channel because it is definitely well needed❤
Thank you for taking the time to watch the video and for your thoughtful insight. We agree that mental abuse is less apparent than its physical counterpart, which does not mean that it's any less traumatizing. In your opinion, why do you think that the world tends to forget about the emotional effects of abuse?
@@Psych2go Good question I think it has everything to do with how people view others. In other words people try to talk down on others and never think to understand how it could make that other person feel. It's an I don't care attitude many has especially if they are higher in status. They don't take in consideration that they aren't perfect but paint themselves out like they are perfect and better than others, even on social media which adds to the mental abuse because of cyberbullying, hate comments, and even backlash. That's my view which is why I'm thankful that your channel has so many amazing content to share on mental health. Love your content and keep up the good work👍
Man whatever 😂
✨ Timestamps and Major Points ✨
1. 0:40 A kingdom of isolation
2. 1:23 Reign of worthlessness
3. 1:57 Fortress of avoidance
4. 2:34 Blame game
5. 3:12 Battle of outbursts
6. 3:56 Conceal don't feel (DONT LET THEM KNOWWWWWW, WELL NOW THEY KNOWWWW LET IT GOO LET IT GOOO)
I am truly sorry for the frozen reference.
Anyway, if any of you have been emotionally abused, remember that you can heal! I turned into a prick after getting emotionally abused, but here I am now! You can and will get better! Believe me.
I am happy for you wes❤ I am slowly healing finally. I am learning to trust people after a decade and i am expressing myself little by little now. These are small steps. But i never thought I can do all these😊 I dont know know why but I feel like sharing it here
@@stardust942 Small steps or not, they're still steps! Little by little, you will heal. I believe in you! One day, you're going to be fully healed, and you're going to be proud of how far you've come. Keep going! 🤍🤍🤍
Comedy gold XD for the reference lmfao
Jeez, you really need to let these references go
@@wes2326 thank you. This means so much to me:)
as a literal former child-slave who wasn't aloud to do anything other kids did, and who was responsible for the comfort of narcissist parents who always reminded me that I was less than what they expected, I relate to this heavily. My mom died last year and although I miss her, I'm beginning to heal in a way I never could while she was alive.
Dude that’s so amazing what advice to you have coping with the abuse ?
Your mom was your abuser?
@section_b, I fully appreciate what you are saying when you mentioned that you started to do some healing when your mom passed away. I only realized just how much of a damaged childhood I had when my mom passed away too. I loved her but I always had the feeling that life had been so difficult with her. The vast majority of those captions mentioned I had experienced at one time or another, some more than others. Now as an older adult I don't take the much $hit from anyone now. Live to my own tune and am happier for it. Take strength in that you can do this!!
“It’s important to reach out for help.”
Last time I tried to reach out for help from my parents, they sat me down and forced me to talk about my problems, then proceeded to undermine my problems and say I was being overdramatic. They refused to let me leave even when I told them I felt like I was going to pass out. I can’t tell if this is emotional abuse or not, but they make me feel like I’m worthless because they don’t even help me through my problems, it the point that I know for a fact they’ll be mad at me for it, so I bottle it up.
Same
It's so interesting how _these_ parents are the same ones telling you, "you can come to me for anything", but then gaslight you about how you feel or about your experiences.
I remember almost wanting to throw up bcs of having to do a "sit down talk". :/
I'm so glad I'm older, I won't stand for 'sit down talks' anymore. I won't tolerate being looked down the nose at. I would rather fight than be talked down to.
Man ofc You are overdramatic
What a waste of air
Yes it’s gaslighting. Usually people like this will never take responsibility for what they’ve done. They say they love you, but when you ask them to stop something that hurts you, they blame you instead and say you’re too sensitive. Yes this is so common, unfortunately.
Wounds cannot heal but you can heal them once you face the things that causes you pain ❤
I grew up with a very controlling mother. It's not until the past few years that I've learned of this, and I've grown more aware of it since.
I relate to this in all levels.
My mom is like a switch, she changes her mood in an instant, once she was joking with me and the other she was yelling at me.
I'm struggling to ask my mom for therapy for this sole reason, her mood changes in seconds and that scares me.
❤️🩹
I've had a lot of trauma in my childhood so it's no surprise to me that I can relate to these problems. What's crazy is you never know how badly even small things can mess you up in the future.
I check pretty much all these boxes, but looking back I don't see things in my childhood as abusive. I've struggled with depression for 15+ years and 3 years into therapy have made pretty much zero progress. My therapist even gave me a potential diagnosis of cptsd. He said it's likely due to affection being gated behind qualifiers (doing well in school, participating in church, etc...). So while I didn't have parents that exploded and yelled at me, it was a lot of "you're smarter than this, how can you do so poorly" when I got an A-.
I don't know where I'm going with this, but it is interesting to see another source validate my therapist since I've kind of been doing the "maybe I'm overreacting and misrepresenting stuff" thoughts.
i was a suma cum laude and my parents told me they could have done better than me and got mad at me. broke my world
I had pretty much the same. It was overall good, but then whenever I had a problem, my mom acted like she was the one hurt and I made her feel bad, instead of being the one to support me. As well as me being her confidant in the time of need. And this is when I was an early teenager. She also acted terribly displeased and hurt when I did small things like every kid, secretly eating junk food for example. But in day to day life, as long as I had good grades, all was good. She wasn't really interested in my life or hobbies, except for superficial questions like: how was school, who are you meeting with, etc.
I was mentally and emotionally abused by a coach and it took me so long to realize what had happened to me was abuse. I miss heard a different coach and messed up and I started apologizing like mad and she stopped me and said “why are you apologizing? It’s not your fault” and let me tell you that simple question turned my life around
Thank you so much for sharing something so personal to you. Being abused by an authority/mentor figure can have lasting effects. We wanted to ask, how are you doing now? Are you finding your other coach much more supportive? If so, how does that help you with the effects that your previous coach had left?
@@Psych2go well I left that club and got away from her, I think the worst part about it all was that before all this I was very close to her. But once I came back from my Injury [a horribly fractured humerus and two surgeries] she was extremely toxic but I still trusted her. I’m doing better now but if a coach shouts or yells at me I am prone to shutdowns and PTSD attacks two years later. I have found a very supportive group of friends who look out for me or help me if a coach unknowingly sets off an attack. I still struggle with a lot of the stuff from her but I’m talking to a councilor now to and stuffs getting a bit better, it’s slow but it’s progress! Sadly I don’t get to work with the other coach now, she lives in a different state but I’ve found new ones who are extremely supportive and believe in me even though I don’t, [maybe someday I’ll be able to believe in myself.]
It’s easier to stop feeling than it is to feel, sometimes I even scare myself with the fact that the thought of putting a bullet through my head is… comforting.
So sorry, but PLEASE Don't let those thoughts and feelings have rule over you. There is Hope and healing. Focus on what you can do and what is pleasant in your life. : your favorite hobby, favorite food, fav music, fav animal. I'm noticing that being around dogs have been so healing for me. Write some affirmations down.: I will get through this, I matter, There's more to life, I Am a survivor, One step at a time, I'm getting stronger. Say them everyday.
I'm praying for you, Philippines 4:13🙏🏽🩵😇
As someone who was emotionally neglected and abused for the majority of my childhood, this is fascinating to see. My sister exhibits more of the emotional numbing and shutting down to others. She doesn't open up to anyone, and if she does feel something, it causes her to have an inconsolable meltdown. But I have more of the anger issues, and blaming myself for everything (as the oldest sibling, I should have helped more, etc.). Thank you for brining these to light, it really helps to know that some of the things I experience aren't always just because I am a bad person.
Im too early to see the comments that wrote the timestamp😭
Samee 😢
me tooo 😭😭
Imagine
sobbing
Yes😢😢😢😢
This used to be so relatable for me until I got help and went on a healing journey. I suggest that for anyone who has gone through this.
As someone who’s been mentally and emotionally abused by a parent in the past and now possibly someone I used to call a friend, it’s nice to watch videos like these and have a bit of closure for some of the ways I act the way I do
Man You are the one who don't love your parents
I don't Even know why would they have u
@@also4406 what the hell is wrong with you?
@Also it’s not their fault that their parents emotionally and mentally abused them.
That's so relatable but now, I've started to stand up for myself. If I get manipulated, I give them the taste of their medicine at the same time so they feel what I feel. It definitely doesn't stop here but it lets them know that you don't care
im so proud of you,keep going
@@_Maryxmkhan09 Ty 💗 I'm proud of you too let's keep pushing 💪
I'm trying to work out the problems with my dysfunctional family. No one's bothered about anyone in my family. I tried to make things right but now I understand that this would take a very long time to recover.
@@nicholasleipzig5448 keep going I'm proud of you. Healing takes some time but it's not impossible :).
@@nicholasleipzig5448 hey what should I do because I have not seen my girlfriend in 8 months so should I go to my girlfriend graduation 👨🎓
Someone complained about the lack of timestamps. Well fear not, my good friend!
0:00 Intro
0:38 A Kingdom Of Isolation
1:24 A Reign Of Worthlessness
1:57 A Fortress Of Avoidance
2:33 The Blame Game
3:10 The Battle Of Outbursts
3:56 Conceal, Don't Feel
4:52 Outro
Hope this helps! Love y'all!
❤
sure they did
Someone wrote the timestamps an hour before you though
@@Anubonek that's okay. I've seen two comments with timestamps on this channel before.
As a victim of being mentally abused by her own parents, it's a tiring situation, sometimes I can't stand by my own and I feel like existing it's just... Difficult. I know they can't understand because they don't believe mental issues are a real problem to take care, but I really try to keep going afterwards.
To whoever is dealing with these things, I hope you feel better and have a brighter future ahead of you. Just having all of these horrible things happening to you is depressing and frustrating. I hope you find help and love for yourself so the healing process will start. ❤
❤️🩹
Damn, this hit so hard... described my experiences almost to the letter. Thank you.
Thank you for sharing your insight. If possible, could you let us know which part of the video resonated to you?
@@Psych2go This is not Rich, but my sentiments exactly. Every part of the video fit me. I would say the most obvious part is that I used to blame myself for everything and everyone. ___Steve
I’m 55 years old and was definitely emotionally abused by my stepdad back in the very late 60’s and through the 70’s. He was extremely violent and expected absolute perfection from my siblings, myself, and my mother. I watched this man beat my mother mercilessly for years and it STILL has a hugely profound effect on me even 45 to 50 years later.
He caused all of the aftermath that is outlined in this video. I’ve spent a LOT of money on therapy and psychiatric treatment to try desperately to get past all the damage that he caused for me and my family.
My mother kept him around WAY past his welcome and so I have deeply ingrained issues with my mother, too. I’m a person who HATES violence and I do all that I can to avoid any kind of conflict, which falls into the Conceal category, as well as the Isolation category. This has caused me no end of missed opportunities to have much more engaged relationships with different people around me and at least one woman whom I definitely know I could have had a relationship that brought me out of my shell. But it didn’t happen because I was too afraid to do my part to be outgoing and cause her to know how I felt about her. This falls into the Worthlessness category because I just didn’t feel worthy of her time, attention, affection, and beauty. I have always felt ugly, stupid, worthless, unable to do anything good or that contributed to the good of those around me, and have always felt like nothing I needed or felt mattered at all.
So I look back at my life and see countless missed opportunities and moments that could have developed into something that redeemed me.
I am a Senior Civil Engineer and have a BS in Aerospace Engineering and Botany. So I accomplished a good education and have always been very good at my profession, but social life and personal relationships have always been my downfall and caused horrendous difficulties in my life. I’ve done my best to overcome the effects of emotional abuse, but it cut me so deep and broke my spirit so abysmally that I am numb to the core, just as this video outlines.
This video has made me feel more relieved and gave some courage to break away from a friend I used to love/care for.
My friend, while having been one of the few that I've had a lot of fun being with, has been the biggest cause of my emotional breakdowns and trauma. Throughout the beginning of our friendship, he would always try to isolate me from my friends because if I had more friends, he would think I plan on leaving him or forgetting about him. Since I was so naive at the time, I fell for the tactics and became a very dependent person, always relying on his company to fill the void of loneliness after losing touch with my friend group.
Now that I've gotten more mature and older, I found the courage to make the move and break it off from him. It hurts a little to do so, but I know that it is for the better and can benefit myself to be more happy and have more freedom.
Thank you Psych2Go for making this video! It really helped me and it makes me feel less alone
Hey, I usually don't write comments but this one got my attention because i had to go through a similar phase than you did. Usually people say they were emotionally abused by their parents/family or their partner but rarely seen people say from a simple freind.
So I had a similar "friend" than you did. Always tried to manipulate me so I spent time with him and not others and made me feel bad for it.Also insult me stuff like that. I could go on with things he did but that would take way to long. I mean it was never that one thing but rather always small things but those add up. But back then I was very naive and felt like I had to be friends with him. Also because I feared that he would talk shit in school about me and annoy me all the time or something like that. This would go a couple of years. But tbf in the beginning he wasn't like that I don't know why he tourned like this. Anyways. Luckily at some point he found a girlfriend and slowly I distanced myself from him.
To this day I have trust issues and I'm very cautious with who I be friends with and even then I don't want a very close friendship.
To this day I ask myself why he was like that and how he could do certain things because I can't believe that a kid or lets say young boy (we were like 13/14) manipulates others on purpose or doesn't have any sympathy at all. Like he told himself "oh today I'm going to manipulate him". I can't really believe that tbh so i think this question remains unexplained.
I don't know why I'm telling you all this but I somehow found myself in your text so I wanted to share my experience as well and letting you know your not alone😅
@@Meilo33 I'm so sorry that you've had to go through a similar experience like mine. It can be a bit sad to see friends change or become different as we get older. It tends to happen to anyone and everyone, and it's a bit upsetting. However, you sharing your experience with me, makes me feel like there are people just like me out there and that's something to feel a bit good about.
I am in the recovery process of my trauma and while I may not feel 100% myself most of the time, I can definitely see the difference in how I see things and I feel a lot better. I really hope that you have better friends today that treat you with the respect that you should always deserve and receive in return.
Thank you again for sharing! It means a lot to me
@@gremlingabe thank you very much for this comment.
Yeah today i have better friends and I'm glad that you also are feeling better now and i hope that you continue to get better and have already found friends that treat you with respect.
Don't give up no matter in which situation you are. There will always be people that actually care about you and love you.
Life can be hard sometimes but it makes me feel better that I'm not alone. I wish you all the best✌️
@@Meilo33 You're too sweet! Thank you very much for the support! I do now have better friends and I adore all of them with all my heart.
I'm very happy you've found better people and I hope you continue to do better and be the best that you already are! Again, thank you for the sweet comment and support!
I wish you the best as well! 💕
Same..
Battle of outburst just hit the bullseye for me a bit too well, Having a ton of pressure on yourself is a habit that is so self destructive, being scared of failure, wanting to make sure things don’t get out of control is just relatable for me.
As someone who is currently watching this at 3 am when my parents think I'm asleep, I can relate to this, especially the point about avoidance.
Don't give up, no matter what. You are stronger than you know. At 67, I am looking back on having survived and abusive childhood and I wish that I could somehow mind-meld with others currently in the situation and let them know not to lose self respect. Their opinions of you are not YOU. Do not allow them to kill your self-esteem, causing you to engage in behaviors that are an offshoot of that feeling - risk-taking and poor "coping" mechanisms that you engage in because you know something is missing but you don't know what. And by the Gods, don't think that harming yourself in any way will make them feel badly. Nope. They'll just use that as a bit of "I told you so" so they can play the long-suffering victim to the group of fawning sycophants the loosely refer to as "friends." Save yourself a LOT of misery and just realize you will never be perfect - or as in my case, even acceptable - to them but that the fault isn't in you, it's in THEM. Bide your time until you are able to leave and set out on your own. When you are able, you may want to search out a therapist who specializes in trauma-based disorders - I have one and he's awesome. I am so sorry that you have to be in such a situation. Just know that you aren't alone (I know that doesn't always help much, but still) - I mean there ARE others who DO understand. I always was partial to the quote by Friedrich Nietzsche that was used at the beginning of "Conan" - (no, not the new one, the REAL one with Arnold - "What does not destroy me, makes me strong." I have found it to be true. Be well and safe. (And I gather from your name that you're a gamer - me too, my husband and I - it's a great catharsis - (I had a therapist once who played GTA because she said she needed it after talking to some of the people she had to deal with all day - she did assessments for the prison system on pedophiles, to give her op[inion whether or not they should be released). Anyway, gaming is great for totally catching your mind when you start to feel yourself slipping down the rabbit hole to self-defeating and unhealthy thinking.
Anyway sorry lol didn't mean to go one so! Geez it's about time for me to log in to ESO 😆😆Be well, friend.
You’re going to look back with such love and pride in the future, when you remember yourself now. Big hugs. ❤
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It's terrible that I actually have most of these so far and I don't even remember if I was emotionally abused that bad 😦
That can happen. I've lost most of my childhood memories thanks to my cPTSD. Sometimes you're left guessing because the symptoms match but you just have a blank for most of those years. Best of luck to you and I hope you can get someone qualified to talk to and figure it out.
@@suitov So sorry to hear that! My best regards to you as well.
Luckily, I've managed to talk to a therapist, and we've been working on this matter now!
As someone who’s mentally, physically & emotionally abused I can relate.
😂
These replies are so cruel-
@@IlikeFish1638 FR💀
I relate to this so much. I remember crying so much as a kid and I didn't realize it was because of all the experiences I've had with other people. I have a speech impediment. People where not so kind to me as a child. Shit, even my family treated me differently from my siblings and peers. As an adult, I don't cry anymore, even when experiencing extreme emotion, not a single tear. It saddens me even more that I can't have that experience anymore. All of the things that I've been through, I now have to sort out as an adult. I realized this after some serious self reflection. It's a long journey y'all, but I believe we all can do it. You're gonna have to sort out some very repressed memories to truly clear out the closet. It's ok, we're all going through this together ❤
My mother is emotionally abusive to me and maybe my brother. I don't know, since she set us against each other slowly but surely, and I only noticed now that it's too late. I still live with her, and it's a pain, but I noticed the signs after... an event. I was hurt, and she made it about herself. I started questioning everything. Now, I know better, and I refuse to let her hurt me anymore. My life is my life, I'm not letting her ruin it before I ever truly lived.
This just completely describes me. Every single point.
Same
❤️🩹💔
I tried to explain to someone that this is how I feel the other day. Thank you for this video! I have been struggling and going through with this my whole life, and I'm scared I passed these traits to my children. We are trying to work through these chains now.
I think the best thing u can do to not repeat history is, don’t push your assumptions on them. If they are feeling uncomfortable sad, don’t always try to solve it.. listen., I think this was the main problem for most of us.. our parents didn’t try listening nor understanding, instead blaming.. saying it’s out fault we can’t figure 💩 out.
At least for me.. i feel like im in a prison.. anxiety is crippling..but that’s what I would try not to do.. I won’t offer solutions unless my kid asks for it. But I will listen to them. And take into consideration what they say instead of blaming them for being broken.. maybe it’s my fault for breaking my kid? I dunno..
Also don’t hit them.. that 💩 destroys the kind..
That moment where you need to watch a video on emotional abuse to verify that you were, in fact, abused, and that you aren't a monster.
On a different note, excellent work as always Psych2Go! Love your animations and your voice lines are so soothing and the info is super clear and concise.
I've been aware of the emotional abuse I've experienced (it's the driving force behind my therapy), but I appreciate the reminders of its effects on us. I've gotten so used to feeling like this, it's hard to remember that there's a light at the end of the tunnel.
Thank you!
One of my favorite originally made sayings, A fortress with no windows, a single door locked by chains of sadness and a throne upon which I sit guarded by unrelenting fear.
Recently realized i have been emotionally abused pretty much half of my life, and because of that i have no confidence and self esteem growing up. I'm still in denial sometimes, but i guess realizing it is a good step to start healing
This is... painfully relatable especially the apologizing to everything. I was never emotionally abused by my parents (in fact they raised me very well) It's due to years of school bullying along being in a rather toxic long-term current relationship.
End your own misery then if You know what i mean 😂
Double check family of origin issues, because you don’t normally move into abusive relationships without having something controlling you in your childhood, no matter how small it is, demand for good grades, etc. if you can pinpoint where it started it might give you a heads up on why you continue to go there in relationships. I could be so wrong though in this situation. I just figured out what my issues with my parents where when I was around 40 yrs old. And they raised me well, too. 🤷🏻♀️💔
I could relate to everything in this video. My lightbulb went off. Years of dysfunction in my family, being constantly scapegoated by my oldest sisters, ignored by others, and gaslit by my oldest son. At 57, I'm an emotional wreck, burnt-out, sad, depressed, and tired. I just want relief.
I hope you the best sir,I might not know who you are but I hope you recover from all your wounds.
@@margaretteschmidt4423 thanks 😊
This channel has a gentle way of telling me that 90% of what I think is my personality or me being an Aquarius ?! Is simply pure PTSD, and I am not mad at it.
Me too! I can relate.
This is so relatable! Especially after my last attempt at a relationship, all of the signs got amplified and became even more apparent, even though they were already present throughout my entire life. I believe going through a toxic relationship pointed out to me what I needed to work on, and without it it might have taken much longer for me to work on healing, if ever at all.
It's crazy how much I relate to this, it felt like you were describing me throughout the video in ways I never thought about before. Thank you for talking about this and for spreading awareness. Everyone, please remember that you're loved, important, & worth so much
Im happy this channel exists , it motivates me alot through my toxic parents , im healing finally , im starting to love myself from you! I can never thank you enough♥️
This video made me tear up because it described me to a tee. It's almost scary how accurate it is. And also reminded me that there are people out there who understand. Who care enough to understand.
This video really resonated with me and reminded me of some really tough times from the past. I have been working on my trauma from all the emotional abuse I went through and it's been helping me quite a lot, I am really happy with the progress I have made in overcoming the trauma 😊
Oh my goodness. The artwork in this video so accurately depicts the emotions and experiences that are described in the voice over. The two together are so impactful in the story telling and message throughout.
Why is it that on my lowest days your videos pop up? It’s impressive really. I’d say this is all accurate, but absolutely nothing I’ve experienced has been diagnosed.
4, 5 and 6 hit me. I never figured there was a concrete explanation to this behavior, and I’ve been like this since my childhood 😓
Sad that I go through this almost every day. I dread having to wake up in the morning because I might have made the slightest mistake and immediately get ridiculed or heckled by my parents or some kids looking to take advantage of me. I'm worried about anything and I have been called just about every piece of verbal venom in the book. I try to make things get better, but things just end up collapsing on me. I'd like to talk to people, but then I'll have a mini panic attack because I'm afraid I'll be backstabbed or called horrible names if I connect with them for too long and do something even slightly irrational. I'm trying to make strides but who's to say that I'll go back to my old habits again?
My entire family was highly emotionally abuse and I have been diagnosed with C-PTSD so I was looking into it now it makes perfect sense. Thank you for these videos.
I was emotionally abused by two narcissists as a child. I live with my mom, now, and I could relate to all of these points to a tee. My mom and her side of the family do see that my father emotionally and verbally abused me, but they ignore the fact that I'm still stuck in it. Something that happened to me once my father and I became estranged, and this happened non-stop when I was 13, was dissociation. I didn't think that where I was was real, and that I was really just in a dream stuck with my father. I would also think, "That never happened to me. That happened to someone else," as well. I still struggle with dissociation and emotional numbness to this day, as well as what's mentioned in this video... I appreciate how you amazing people make these videos, shedding light on these subjects and their harmful effects on people. Keep up the amazing work!
I feel this my awesome mom is very emotionally abusive and unfortunately. I'm not able to get out of the way. She's right now because I live with her but I just want to share. Sometimes I just feel like I'm an auto pilot and like I'm constantly avoiding her. I stay in my room or stay at work just as gonna have to see her and I'm constantly apologizing like it's my fault you and I know most of time it isn't but she still makes it feel like it's my fault and she's constantly fat shaming me and projecting. It just makes me feel worthless.
Our trauma does not define us but it is our responsibility to stop the negative cycles that have been propagated to us. We can overcome our emotional strife and be masters of our lives, just keep going!
This comment couldn't anoy me more try living with it then tell me it's our responsibility you have no idea
I love all the quiet kinder things in this video to help soften the blow of the message. it helped keep me grounded when watching it. thank you for the care you all put into these videos
1:46 I love that you added kobeni.
All of these are checked on my box.. I'm well aware that I'm going through it but I just can't admit it because it makes me feel a certain way.
I came on to the channel to rewatch some videos and another new video I love these and they make me calm and make me actually relate to something for once so feel better everyone
Thank you so much for your kind words. We'd like to ask, which part of the video did you relate to?
@@Psych2go I really relayed to socially withdrawing which I’ve been doing recently not even realising but this really brought my attention to it thank you and keep making such great content ❤❤
The timing of this video popping up in my algorithm is impeccable. Thank you.
It's so weird how I can tell anyone else that is going through this that they are being emotionally abused... no problem... but when it happens to me I could not see it at all. I appreciate this so very much.
This is me and all these points. 😢
I don’t know how to heal from it, as it’s difficult.
This video, where has it been all those years.
Still…this video is just a right moment, now that I’m healing and see the signs.
So here's my story....I don't know if it can be called emotional abuse...but this incident made a strong wound in me...
It all started when I got a friend from a community that my mom and my maternal grandmother( who lives with us) hated...I initially didn't know that they had such a strong hatred for her...I was the most studious one of my class and I never had true friends....I was happy to find a true friend in her....
And then during my second year of high-school she joined the tuition in which I studied....the tuition is in the ground floor of my home and my mom and grandma hated her coming to tuition everyday...they thought I had deliberately made her join in the tuition and me and her are upto doing some bad things..they thought she is spoiling me and making me drift away from studies while she was clearly not doing anything like that...
My mom and grandma started arguing every day regarding this with me..they stopped talking with me directly....they called me disobedient, spoilt, arrogant..they didn't talk with me for weeks...and my tuition teacher also had face the consequences of teaching my friend...
They started assuming things that I didn't do, they spoke all sorts of things that a teen would never want to hear from her parents....moreover I have PCOD which makes my periods too long( like for weeks )
It's only my dad who stood with me in all this and solved the problem..
Now we have passed from school...
She has taken engineering and I am preparing for my med-school entrance...
But still they would never leave a chance of belittling me with that incident...
They want me to accept all their opinions, their choices etc.....but still I know that they love me, but they won't care how hurt I will feel by their words...
That incident made me emotionally very weak..I cry for very insignificant things and then laugh or behave like kid for unnecessary reasons....
Everyone facing such kind of issues...hang in there.. we got this....❤😊
Man too much to read 😂
JustKysAlright?
Stay strong ❤️🩹💔
Thank you for another interesting video. I have been through this and I'm still learning to heal myself but I take it one day at a time.
this video reminded me of many memories i didnt want to remember.
1:41 i love the Kobeni reference
When life emotionally abuses you until you cry; giving you a glimmer of hope until the cycle returns to emotional abuse.
Your videos always get saved for later, I can never finish them. It's too painful to have such insights. I geuss ill try to learn more one day, thankyou for your works.
I 100% have this and nobody other than my psychologist tries to help and my parents dont admit they're wrong, switching between excessively angry and "nice" everytime
YOU ARE IMPORTANT
YOU ARE LOVED
YOU MATTER!!!
please remember this always
💜🙏🏼💜
I pray you take time each day to recognize your worth, to tell yourself at least one thing you love about yourself each day, and to be that light for yourself within all this darkness
Sending you so much love, prayers and blessings along your journeys in life🙏🏼🙏🏼💜🙏🏼🙏🏼
Stay blessed and stay safe🙏🏼
This is me lol. Very informative video, thank you for making it. A good book I've read recently about the cptsd life is "what my bones know" by Stephanie Foo. That book along with this video has helped me in understanding myself and will hopefully help more and more people in understanding their situations and their own behaviors.
Kudos to the artist on this episode. Good quality sketches with an unique color palette.
Thank you. I can relate to every single symptom. I don't think I've ever heard put so simply.
I LOVE THE OMORI REFERENCES!!! (4:22)
Samee
Every point in this video applies to me. I’m 30 now, and trying to better understand myself. Does anyone know ways or how I can work on these issues of emotional abuse so that they aren’t so debilitating?
Maybe you should go for Therapy.
Boy am I glad I have my whole life to get this shit under control. thanks psy!
No offense i really love your vids it helps a lot of people and it is informative but I think you might also want to make videos concerning on "How to cope up when we are emotionally abused " because many people already know that they are emotionally abused and are just stuck on their mental condition. Peace and more lovee 💖
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As far as I'm aware of, I've never been abused in any way growing up, but ever since I had to take on a more adult role in 2018, I've had these exact thoughts playing out in my mind. I've become the sole caretaker for my grandma and I think that might be the source. I'm not blaming her, but I believe I may have started emotionally abusing myself and I don't know why. I obviously need help for this, but idk where or how to start.
Dude same I had to be my brothers care taker when I was kid and I wish I could’ve been focusing on homework that’s sounds horrible but I didn’t need to be a care taker I needed to be a child so now I’m all ducked up with my mom that can’t even take a second to ask me how I’m doing but I hope we healll so amazingly I believe we will :)
All of these apply to me. The issue is, getting help for this kind of abuse is almost impossible, especially for a kid who is being told their overreacting. I lived in constant and LEGITIMATE FEAR of my parents bug when I tried to tell people they would always look at how my parents acted around others and told me I was overreacting. This type of abuse is not only hard to spot, but also hard to find support for, especially for young kids. As a child I KNEW something was wrong, but when I tried to tell people they told me I was making it up or that it was "normal". Nothing about my situation was or should have been "normal" and now I have to live the rest of my life with the consequences of THEIR actions. I just wished someone HAD listened when I asked for help.
Everything you said is so true. Emotional abuse which is also verbal abuse is so real and it is isolating and depriving of life so many people. Thank you.
I'd like to give into my emotions one day, perhaps I'll be motivated enough to do something of significance, instead of walking on eggshells almost everytime, even when I'm alone.
Perhaps giving up and giving in is what will make the difference.
(•̀ᴗ•́)و 𝚍𝚘 𝚒𝚝!!
Man.. why does this feel relatable
Along with all the tons of comments, I can totally relate to this. So even though you may feel all alone in the world and/or like nobody cares, everyone is here that is or has felt the same way. Just know youre not alone. We all just haven't crossed paths yet but we're everywhere feeling that way too.
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ The vest video yet! Breaking the topics down in plain language ! Amazing !
Timestamps
1). Kingdom of isolation 0:38
2). Reign of worthlessness 1:24
3). Fortress of avoidance 1:57
4). Blame game 2:33
5). Battle of outbursts 3:10
6). Conceal don't feel 3:56
Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
0:40 : Kingdom of Isolation
1:25 : Reign of Worthless ness
1:58 : Fortress of Avoidance
2:35 : Blame Game
3:13 : Battle of Outbursts
3:58 : Conceal Don't Feel
I tried to help you 😊 no need to like my comment.
6/6 for me but not surprised. Literally spent the first 16 years of my adult life in an abusive marriage. Videos like these have been super helpful for understanding myself/the abuser/the relationship as a whole. Its good to know that it's not all in my head after decades of gaslighting. Now if I could just figure out why it's so hard to talk about the good parts of the relationship and so easy to talk about the bad.
THIS is VERY, VERY on point!! With good explanations on why.
Hey erm
I don't know how many people need to hear this but...
The journey to healing is never easy. I know I struggle so hard with all of these and more. Not just from family but others around me. I thought I couldn't heal until I finally did somehow.
Everyone who hurts has a good core. If you feel guilty, even if the thoughts say you're guilty, you're not. We're our own self critics and acknowledging that is important.
What I'm trying to get to, though, is that this hurt won't last. You CAN recover, but only if you let yourself heal. Not easy, but... I know that we all can heal. So...
I don't know if this will reach many people, be they old or new commenters, but... Keep fighting. You're not alone and you're stronger than you think. Have a great day okay?
Thank you for the words of encouragement for the people in the comment section. We hope that you have a great day as well.
@@Psych2go thanks :)
Anything good always bounces right off while the bad stuff sticks like glue, so I had to read that a few times. Thanks. 🙂
@@rikitikitavatiki no worries. I know I sometimes do that too. I hope it helped!