Women Aren’t Scared Of Being Alone Anymore/It’s Wake Up Season
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- čas přidán 31. 05. 2024
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Women were never scared of being alone. It's men projecting their fears of being alone😂😂😂
Men can't be alone. They need a woman to take care of them,baby them mother them. Women on the other hand do just fine on their own with their strong circle of good friends.
And I certainly don’t mind having a cat or two.
That’s why they called us frigid old spinsters back in the day. Women been knew
@@kgs2280 Depending on the personality of the cat I don't either 😅
@@beautifullEternal They can call us whatever they want now. We no longer care!
It is not a Black woman's job to continue to hold up the Black Community, it is the men in our community's job, and why do we have to many single mothers in our community?
Yeah, it's not our job. I'm tired of people inside the community and outside trying to make it our job. My only job is to avoid men like that and by doing that it actually does break that cycle of perpetuating broken families. Yes, because I'm not creating the situation in the first place. It's black mens' job to fix themselves at this point. I'm sorry for their pasts. I'm sorry their parents failed them and society failed them but they've got to start doing the hard work for themselves now just like women have been doing.
peut-être parce que les deux ont fait le mauvais choix
The men want to lead so bad let them fix it or get a passport.
Because BLK men make babies and think they don’t count because they weren’t married to the mother … imagine thinking it’s ok to create kid that you have no plan to care for smh only in BLK a stan
IL en faut generalement deux, mais parfois un seul qui refuse de grandir. Le syndrome de Peter Pan est reel.
Screw the community. Don't settle; stay single until you find the right person, if at all. Worry about yourself.
Yeah, she’s a pick me
She is so lost. Who created these broken homes
Funny how she never seems to wonder _why_ so many BW are suddenly brick-walling it and saying “meet My standards or eff off!” Undue sacrifice, long suffering and martyrdom is tired, Ms. Girl.
If you screw the community, you will LOSE. The community is WOMEN. You are confused and it hasn’t paid dividends bc you have erroneously been brainwashed to think MEN are rhetorical community. They are not. FEMALES!!!! FEMALES are the community.
"Worry about yourself" are words I'm choosing to live by from now on.
I think we need to stop arguing with men about our standards. Stop 👏arguing👏 with people👏 who can't afford👏 your standards👏.
Facts! 💯
Yes, ESPECIALLY arguing with BM. 🚩🚩BM can’t afford to have a HEALTHY relationship let alone a relationship with STANDARDS, BOUNDARIES and TANGIBLE Expectations…. 😫😫😫
Agree. They are so mad when we want a man who's even two steps up from a bum! 30 years of dealing with them here, and I can tell all you younger women that it's not worth the bother! Invest in YOURSELVES! If a great guy comes along, awesome! But don't try to find awesomeness in someone who just doesn't have it.
That part
@@Melanated483that part. When I was on the apps, I literally checked the no BM box.
Women have to lower their standards,but men don't have to lower theirs. Not gonna happen.
That Part💯💪🏾🥰👑
Facts
They want to continue being vile and having a wife that puts up with him , so he can feel powerful .
Been there done that! As someone that's been on both sides I can testify that it's much better to have/keep your standards, boundaries and expectations. And I'm a woman that's never dated a "Pookie", who's exes always paid for our dates and who on paper are considered "good black men" and yet I still experienced "Pookie like" behavior. Now make that make sense!
They are all told they are entitled to a 10.
A lot of guys don’t realize that threatening us by saying “you’ll be forever alone” is not the insult they think it is… lol. I get to sleep in more? Not clean after you? Win win.
Not be abused or cheated on - no stds
YESSSSS!!!!
also women will always trade zex for money. they have always done it in one form or another. Fellas, push for Legal Brothels and bring up the Asian sector of New York as an example of how the government allows this now. Push regulation, licensing and taxing prostitution an a legal enterprise. Now the neo-feminists can have all the alone time and lesbian time they want and never have to deal with men at all.
enjoy ur old folks home lmao
@@parlayking we will! We’ll be able to afford a nice one thanks to not being left alone to raise some dude’s kids
In all seriousness it is not worth the risk to be in a relationship. You could be abused, hurt, abandoned, etc. In no way is that worth the risk. The people who claim to love you the most are the people who hurt you the worst.
They turn into your energy before they became friends. I saw a story where a male stabbed how his baby mother 100 times and burn down home with the three children in it.😢
This 100%. Never been hurt by a stranger. Physically, mentally, sa, all kinds of abuse that came from family, close family friend
Well said!
@@no-uhuh This is so dumb. Of course strangers aren’t going to hurt you they have nothing to talk to you about. Thats like saying I only get wet when i walk in the rain… like DUH
@@no-uhuhwow! So true
These boys need to stop telling us to settle. There's nothing wrong with being alone if the other choice is to be with someone abusive.
And or broke and or hideous! 😂
This !
The trauma and abuse will unalive you ! 💔
settling is exactly what creates what they hate , single mothers …
it's funny to me that they think being alone is "settling." hard projection much? for THEM, being alone IS settling. but for us, it's not. we're choosing ourselves, and we're LOVING it
I don't care about the community or anything. I am and WILL ALWAYS be childfree and manfree forever by choice, period.
same
Same
I am childfree, but I have a very well-behaved and generous boyfriend. If he does the switch up, I will be man free as well.
Not sleeping around and not bringing babies into the world you don't intend to nurture and care for IS caring about the community. We have too many broken women and broken, abused children already.
Yep. She can mule by herself. I ain’t goin’.
Men don't settle for less. If he doesn't want a plus size woman he will not compromise.
Exactly💯
And he will leave her or cheat on her as her body changes in pregnancy and post partum, but yeah, we need to compromise. 🙄
That’s what I’ve been saying. We need to settle? How come they don’t want to date women who are overweight?
Or if they don't want a woman with kids
Men settle the most. And not wanting a fat woman us not comparable lol
Some of these men don't seem to understand that you can be married and alone at the same time.
Cheating husband? You're alone.
Husband who isn't a co-parent? You're alone.
Abusive husband? You're alone.
Neglectful husband? You're alone.
Never-home husband? Youre alone.
I have one more to add: Husband who wouldn’t take care of himself so now he needs a nurse-wife and is sickly? You’re alone. And exhausted.
Well said!
only a fool would marry a western woman today
@rainpouringsnoring Very Well Said. Your comment needs to be pinned
@@tvdavis wow that sounds like my maternal grandmother and her husband (not my bio grandfather). Even as I type this comment he is in the hospital and not at the house. My grandfather passed away back in 2015 I think.
I thought for sure she wouldn't remarry because grandpa was also sickly towards the end of his life and died in the hospital. But here she comes marrying one of his friends sometime afterwards 😳! Granted his wife had passed away at around the same time as my grandpa did.
Now it's coming up she wants us to come have Thanksgiving at her house because her husband is very stationary and just doesn't do anything. I hate seeing her having to jump from one sickly man to yet another one. But I guess I can understand it's probably just a comfort thing and them not wanting to be alone near the end.
But I definitely wouldn't want that for myself to end up being a nurse/wife combo to a sickly man. I'm already probably looking towards that same caretaker fate for my parents in the future (I live very close by). So the last thing I want to add to that is a husband to boot!
How do they still need to be mothered if they grew up with a mom and no dad? 🤨 Wouldn’t that mean they still need to be fathered since the dad wasn’t there? 😂 These arguments make no sense. Just excuses.
Right. I was confused. How does one need "mothering" if they were raised by their mother?🤔
Right. They always seem to make everything the mom’s fault.
😂 All I can tell you is my ex's mother said to me, after I ended it "Well he may need a little training." I merely responded, "I'm not training a mfkr over 40 to do shit, let his friends do it." Her son made it clear the year I buried my Dad that he didn't respect anyone with a vagina and I told her as much. He'd even get upset over the treatment his kids recieved from me. 🤷🏽♀️Good luck Ma'am.... months later he tried asking me to marry him.😳😒🚮 The shitters out here abound in both sexes; be careful, laugh and walk awayl! 😅
It’s gaslighting and word salad and deflection and yes excuses. It’s manipulation. If it doesn’t make logical sense it’s just considered word salad gaslighting.
I know of one who couldn't do anything!!! He just sat there and literally expected to have his toast buttered! Breakfast table was set (tea,sugar,toast,butter etc) and he stated that if the toast was given to him unbuttered, he will just split it. Like what?! How useless can you be?
Women were never afraid to live alone. They just always needed weapons to protect themselves from male predators while being alone.
Exactly
Now there is conceal carry
So true 😢
I've accepted being single is safer mentally, emotionally, and physically. I see no benefit to dating these days, especially with the femicide rates up and how toxic dating is.
This.
@@Liz-wz8dh I refuse to date again and rather be single -
Agreed
@@TKOin2life Dating is so toxic and oversexualized- plus these males are unhinged
Dankie
12:11 This woman is the President & CEO of Pickme University in the bc. Sorry sweetheart, but I am not sacrificing my mental sanity, my emotional and physical health, and my financial wealth to "save" the BC. We can't save something that has been dead for centuries. The bc is what it is. If y'all want to continue in the dysfunction with these dudes, be my guest. I will be living my best life on the other side of town.
Exactly. It's that thinking that have us in this situation now. She's a moron. Also it's not like we'll get anything for martyring ourselves aside from blatant disrespect. No thanks lol
Amen to that
💯
They are not going to like it when project 2025. They are going to be worse than slavery and other blk people will volunteer
Doesn't seem much of a "community" rather than vampire central from women's labor. Because what are these men giving back exactly?
Bad, abusive relationship is worse than being alone. Cats are are so much better than high quality men, alpha men. Better be alone than in abusive relationship.
There is no such thing as a Alpha man.
@@xxarianahiltonxx5116 I referred to manosphere labels.
@@Erintii gotcha.
I personally think there is, just not the misogynistic version, i would describe it as a tough strong guy who is the best at what he does, sure of himself, can get women, and can and will protect his family @@xxarianahiltonxx5116
I have cats and dogs. None of them have ever hurt me ON PURPOSE, for their own personal gain.
To the woman asking about the community, BW are the reason the community has thrived at all. BW have single-handedly pushed themselves in the workforce, juggling kids and school and doing it all on their own, for the most part. When do we stop making excuses for these men?
Okay, preach!
She gave pick me energy. She sound just like the men who blame single mothers for everything. It really isn’t black womans job to be an incubator & stay in undesirable relationships
At this point, the black community is not my responsibility. I'm my own responsibility. There's no growth here. She's delusional
💯 Also, I feel that woman's mindset is extremely heteronormative as it implies that women don't have any worth unless we're partnered with men. A community doesn't just consist of heterosexual couples but all humans-children, young people, single people, old people, LGBTQIA people, etc. The fact that the onus isn't on men to think about the community reinforces how society conditions them to be selfish. Until we stop conditioning cishet BM to be selfish, they won't be my first priority. I prioritize BW, Black children and Black LGBTQIA people.
Thank you. Women like her will never stop making excuses for men because she is waiting to be picked.
Exactly. They need to realize that being alone is not the worst thing for us. Being stuck with them is.
And i oop🫠😂😂
This right here💯💪🏾🥰👑
Exactly
And their babies!
Considering Sade Robinson was recently unalived on the FIRST date; I think it's safe to say most voluntarily single women these days don't care about finding a man when women can't even make it out of the dating process alive. I'd rather be alone and safe, than in the company of a wicked man.
Omg I just finished reading the news article about this. Absolutely horrific. She was so young and he clearly was a predator looking for younger, unsuspecting women. Put him under the prison.
RIP to her. I cried hearing what happened to her. Nobody deserves that❤❤
Women don't even need to have a man to have a baby. A woman can get her eggs fertilized with the use of a sperm bank.......and, you won't risk your life of being in a relationship.
Yeap and it's 2 more bw that passed away on the 1st date with wm, she's just the latest one; and we know that bm are still deleting bw every 5 to 5.5 hours, be safe ladies, DO NOT LOWER YOUR STANDARDS AND DO NOT BE ALONE WITH STRANGE MEN ❤🙏🏾
Ladies please listen: BUY PROPERTY ASAP! The window for us to be solo homeowners is closing because the cost of homes is growing exponentially. This PRIVILEGE that our ancestors did not have may be erased. Buy now, ladies. I closed on my house last year, and it was the best possible thing that happened in my life. Please buy property. Be a landowner and rent to other women. Gain some capital and look after fellow wgtow or women-centered sisters. I have a 3bd, 2 ba, and I don't live or need a male. I would sooner rent to a fellow sister than sell my home. Always own property, sisters. ❤ I love this channel!
it's so wonderful to see women sharing their wisdom with other women here. I completely agree with your advice! Buying my home was one of the best things I've ever done. I've paid off my mortgage, and it gives me such peace to know that, as long as I pay my taxes on my home, nobody can ever take it from me.
Looking to buy within the next 6 months!
When the elites decide that all of us lose our homes, we will lose. There is a bigger picture of what is going on on earth.
Looking to buy in a few months
She's right. I'm 64 and I'm on my second house. I'm going to sell this one and buy my dream/retirement home in a few months.
To the pickmesha asking "at one point...". The answer is no. At no point. If men cared about the communateh then they would change. But they dont care and i dont care. Down with the system. If the pickmes care sooo much then each one should have 20-40 kids to make up the difference.
Also the billionaires and politicians whining about the birth rate. Bet the billionaires could afford to care for more than a hundred kids.
As a former Pickme, I agree 100%. Toxic individuals in our community outweigh the good-hearted empathic ones. At this point, it’s everyone for themselves.
Lol 😂 right !?
Not to 20-40...
I'm weak 😂😂😂😂
Anyone know the original creator's TikTok handle?
@@strawberribubbleteaThese billionaires and politicians should be made accountable for their "we need more kids". Why aren't people challenging them for these comments? They are in fact the reason people are done having kids. They raise the standards of living that suit the rich. Then expect people to keep struggling. It's over and they need to understand that. Unless they start to really address this situation (Their greed won't allow them), it is over. It is time everyone has a share of the world's RESOURCES. The rich need to stop paying their workers good money so they can start building wealth to bring children into. Either that or the rich can populate the earth themselves.
She can support it alone if that’s what she wants and it’s not a problem. Asking women to continue to sacrifice themselves and their happiness so “you” don’t have to do it alone is hilarious.
For real! 😂Black women are the community and have been carrying the weight since the beginning of time. I’m not sacrificing myself for anyone and definitely a group that is not appreciative of anything a woman does. She can go off and save it her damn self and put on a catsuit to boot. 😂 She sounds like she ate paste growing up.
I'm so excited to see other Black women ignoring this messaging.
@@videofan1010 ikr, it's about time we collectively said eff this isht
Funny how she sounds just like a lot of Blk males 🤔
She's a 🤡 that can't make it make sense💯😭
Community? The one that's vilifying single mothers and telling them to choose better whilst extolling the street cred of a player, telling us that settling for subpar partners is what we are worth. Girl please. We are well aware of the drop in birth rates and some of us are okay with that.
Girl, yes 🎉 llls
I hope the birth rate plummets even further. It needs to.
Right? Where has been? Black men have been and are destroying our communities.
Why keep anything dysfunctional going
A drop in birth rate is literally saving our lives anyway when you take into account the blk maternal death rate.
12:66 Bw have been prioritizing their community for YEARS and have gotten nothing but trash thrown in their face so how dare she say BW need to stop being selfish and take one for the team
WRONG WRING WRONG WRONG. Black so men have NOT been holding up the community. You have been holding up MEN and leaving the true community in shambles. WOMEN, females, are the true community. Hold women up, and you’ll see it THRIVE.
Her mom probably took one for the team
Not to mention that that self martyrdom has done nothing but harm BW and the black community. Prioritizing yourself and vetting your partner is the best thing one can do for the next generation. It will create generational wealth and familial stability. Don’t listen to the pickmes. Put yourself first.
And I love how she says these things as if they were new thoughts and ideas that hadn’t been discussed for decades or more. She’s young and naive and isn’t someone anyone should be taking advice from
Exactly let the church say amen👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾they can hold up themselves it's time for us to care more about having a peaceful life than fighting for a community that don't even respect us and are unaliving us at an alarming rate.
Wife - the one job where having life experience is a disqualifier.
Say it louder for those in the back
Guys say its because of her body count, but thats not true. Give them a hot 35 year old virgin women who understands how life works, is educated, and doesnt take peoples BS. They would say no to her because she is not docile enough for them to tolerate their mistreatment
😂😂😂😂 true
Wow, true🤝.
Don't forget she is also castigated for making mistakes due to no experience. Bravo for such a succient point.
“ Women just need to accept being an object to men…. For the sake of the community.” That’s a very high price that I do not want to pay. 😤❤️🔥🔥
Yea she looked real young and clearly have not had a relationship with a a male.
An old lady once told me that if a man sees you as a sex doll, see him as an ATM
@@IrisDel-qo8xi The gag is that some of these men see women as both. They'll even trick a woman out on OF or as an escort. I saw a case where a beautiful young woman's life was taken who was an OF "model." Well, she was only on OF because her boyfriend pushed her to be on there. That wasn't even originally her goal. A fan got obsessed and took her life. SMH!
I married myself back in Jan 2021. Things are going great! 😂
Congrats! 🥳🎉🎈🎊🎁🍾
I'd love to go to another woman's self-love wedding, OMG! 😮❤🎉 We'd have so much fun!
💪🏾🥰👑💯
Jan 2015 and still happy I chose me
Girl same ❤❤ we're having a fantastic marriage lol
This world needs to take a PAUSE on marriages and birthing children. Look at the absolutely deplorable state of the world. Once everything is fixed and made right, maybe the marriage and childbirth conversation can be picked up again. Until then, no need for those failed ideas to continue.
Women today are more wise, stronger, and educated. Plus, a lot of women are tired of so much mess! Sanity and peace will keep you healthy with a longer life. Yessss... kudos ladies 🎉❤
THIS!
So proud of these younger generations 👏👏👏
This I choose peace - self preservation, self care, and healing ❤
No they're not. They're just full of themselves now. Nothing but egos.
@@user-np2dp8ck4j NOT THIS! Get over yourselves
@@Optim40
We will NOT get over ourselves Incel 😂
This is women now.
Deal.
*THEY WANNA "leave legacy" BUT DON'T WANNA HELP RAISE THEIR KIDS.... THEY JUST WANNA SAY "I gave someone my last name" ...MOST OF THESE KIDS ARE ONLY BORN BECAUSE THEIR PARENTS WANTED MINI MAIDS
These unmarried moms need to give their children their last names since they are raising them by themselves. Protect your peace.
@@blessedcutie8983 story time, I’m actually grateful that my mother gave me her last name instead of my father(deadbeat), because recently, my father was talking to me via WhatsApp and we had a little chitchat here and there and then all of a sudden he had the audacity to say that my last name should be … instead of (my mothers last name) and what happened was I didn’t respond to any of that until I was literally talking out of my mind( in my thoughts) saying first and foremost I wouldn’t want to have the last name of person who abandoned me, and treated me as a last thought, (because he has multiple children by multiple women🤦🏽♀️) I rather have the last name of the person who raised me and took care of me.
Edit: I personally think it’s a ego thing; they just want the title of being a father, having their last name carried on, and legacy without putting any work, but will have the audacity to talk about radical feminism, patriarchy, and the family dynamic oh the irony , if you care about last names so much how about you take my mother’s last name instead … oh you don’t want that, but you’ll wear jerseys of other men ?😒
Facts
Exactly. As if their last name carries weight like a Zuckerberg or Besos.😂😂😂
Which is why I'm glad that lots of mothers have given their children their own last names. It really pisses them off. lol
I no longer ask young ladies, are you getting married. I stopped ten years ago...now I ask, Are you staying safe?
when men say, you need to lower your standards the translation is: you just gonna have to put up with what your grandma and mom put up with.
Don't settle. Stay single. They need you more than you need them. God's protection. Stay single and happy, ladies. 🙏🏾😜
💪🏾🥰👑💯
💯
A single life is a peaceful life.
A middle-aged WW here and I made the worst mistake marrying a man who said we were a team, but really he wanted me to be his maid, nurse, to work,to do all child rearing and everything so he could just focus on his job. Guess what, we both have our doctorates and I met him while a graduate student. I wanted my career too. He lied about so many things and it was devastating. We had one child who is profoundly disabled and surprise, surprise, he abandoned our son so I had to rear our son alone. Please don't ever settle and now that I live alone, I am at peace. We women need to band together. I listen to channels of women of color because they have their shit together and they are leading the charge!
Happy cat lady. Peace is perfect. Stay strong ladies.
😹😹💪🏾🥰👑
These males are getting everything for free when they get married or courting. That has a expiration date when he doesn't need you anymore.
That is why men are choosing to not marry anymore!.... wait a minute, something doesn't make sense here.
@@yougotOWENdmen don’t want to get married anymore because they don’t want to be committed to holding up their end of that bargain. You didn’t prove anything.
@@sydneysweat37 if everything was free then I wouldnt have to hold up anything 😁you just admitted i have to do something on my part for marriage, aka not getting anything for free.
Your turn again!
@@yougotOWENd why would you want a partner for “free”? Sounds like you just want someone to use.
@@sydneysweat37 "these men are getting everything for free" and "not holding your end of the bargain" cannot fit in the same sentence.
When you understand that principle, we can talk further. Otherwise all you are saying is just some projection of what you thinking I am believing and entirely pointless to talk about.
That last lady who’s about “community” is delulu. She had another video of how she was complaining how she stayed with a man when she wasn’t happy and tried and tried but it “didnt work “ - girl why didn’t you settle… it’s because you and him were NOT HAPPY it WAS NOT HEALTHY.
She just miserable and wants company.
Ladies keep your standards HIGH!! That’s how we make a community stronger and better. That’s how anything is made stronger and better- by not accepting mediocre.
Yesss!!she’s a delulu pickme!!!!
She is definitely delulu!!!!
Yes 👏🏽 I was thinking the same. What the “community” needs is for black men to do better. Simple
@@CurlsandThings yup! Community will never elevate - grow- obtain assets if we coddle the men and treat them like babies. Babies don’t owe anything - they are helpless.
Grown ppl are expected to do much more. 🙏🏽🫶🏽
@@CurlsandThings🎯💯
If push comes to shove, I’m team extinction.
Me too!
I am a cat lady. I had been married for 25 years to a nice man, albeit a man whose existing mental issues (I had lowered my standards), got progressively worse to the point where he would not get a job. I divorced him, dated, almost lowered my standards for a man who nearly killed me and now I've been happily single for almost 4 years. Will I do it again? Frankly, I find the process boring. I'll never marry or live with a man. I don't want to work that hard.
You didn’t get married to a nice man though. Why are you in denial that he was terrible from the beginning?
@@sherry4535 Some men switch up. They can carry on an act until they feel you're locked in and then their true colors come out.
From what she was saying about him not getting a job it could be laziness &/or slipping into a depression that wasn't there in the beginning.
@@sherry4535 - Why are you jumping down my throat? Geez, I was practically a teenager, so I perceived him as nice. Back off.
@@ernietbone4168 🤣🤣🤣🤣 girl bye.
It's dangerous to put it on women to get ''dads'' for their kids. Believe it or not, there aren't men rushing the door to male role model for someone elses boys. You are much more likely to have yourself, and/or your kids exploited by a man with ill intentions. If the father absconds from his responsibilities, the best a woman can do is to provide and stable and happy home. Not one with the mess of men in and out.
Abscond, such a good word you picked there. It's accurate, it's true, and it's fun to say. ❤
True. Also the 4B movement. Or just deciding to be extremely picky with who we procreate with.
There are men rushing to do it but its bc theyre pervs
So true. My dad left and an old white male neighbour told my mother to never have a new man till her fifth and last child is at least 18 years old. And I am grateful to mama. She works a lot so she has a great salary and takes care of us all by herself. Our home is peaceful and we all feel very safe. So yes ! Women have all your children with the same man and if he leaves, STAY ALONE !! I know tons of mothers in my environment who did not follow that advice and their first children, who were very bright, are now failing in life !
@@lenajanssens7859I was married to one man and we had three children. When it ended, I promised myself to never bring home a man to sleep over or live with around my children. I also decided never to marry another man, and our home was so peaceful and wonderful. I think my kids are still thankful that I put them first.
I’m single by choice and creating my own happiness. If dirty dogs are my only option, then being alone is the upgrade!
Are you talking about women dogs bcuse theyvare more
12:15 Had me rolling my eyes to the back of my head. Sis, I will ALWAYS put my happiness, my peace, my wants before "the community". Nobody has to live my life, but me and I will NEVER live my life as a "Sista Soldier mule" for any cause or community, because if I'm living in poverty, being beaten, being unalived or can't afford to feed someone's "legacy" on my own, "The community" won't be there to assist me. The community will say I deserved it.
I'll leave that muling mindset for the women who are glad to do it. #GoMules! #FlyThatCapeSis!
“The community won’t be there to assist me. The community will say I deserved it.”
Nothing but facts were written here! 👆🏽
To the "black men want to be mothered because of single black moms" comment, my ex was born and raised by both parents who are traditional where the mother did EVERYTHING for her son. In college, he'd drive home for his mom to do his laundry. I met him well after he graduated and guess who he expected to so his laundry.
I firmly believe a lot of the men who want to be "babied"/taken care of" come from traditional families and want to mimic the lifestyle of their fathers provided by patriarchal norms.
True, unfortunately those women also did not do modern day women any favors. But that's just how it is. We have no reason to want to be their mothers. I really think any modern day woman who signs up for situations like that is going to eventually end up feeling frustrated and taken advantage of, even the tradon wives that claim to love it. We live in a different culture now and it's not hard to see how that lifestyle doesn't really fit with modern values.
Yes! Thats why you see religious men are more likely to have this mentality than those who arent where gender roles are not just encouraged, but pressed!
The men who were raised by single moms hate their mother and want to punish you as scapegoat.
They will place her every sin on your back.
Yes, the key is what the man saw his mother do, in my opinion. My parents were married, but my father was rarely around, so my mother was basically a single mother. She did everything for my family and had no life outside of working and taking care of us. She usually only got a couple of hours of sleep a night. My brother expects the women in his life to do everything for him because he saw my mother do everything. My sisters do everything for the men in their relationships because that's the example they saw in my mother. By the way, I'm a WW.
@@smlorrin This is common in religious families who hold dear to gender norms. Jesus would not like thtmen make their wives take care of all things to do with the home. A devout pious Catholic man I met who has serious influence on men where masculinity is concerned said that many men will go to Hell than women simply on the basis of how they treat their wives. Men wo treat their wives like crap, will have their prayers hindered. And he quoted a Bible verse that supports that last part too.
Ms. Pickmeisha in the middle with the whole where does it leave the black community comment, pose this question to the BM, the BM that get their passports, the BM who 💩 on BWs looks, the BM who make these single parent homes. Ask them that, don't pose that 💩 to BW, we tried, we done trying cuz Glocktavious and Ashtavious have kept the community in shambles with their actions.
She wants black woman to be responsible for the community development but she isn't asking black men to stop creating single mothers home and be responsible. She needs to go to hell pissed me the hell of
Thank you! Exactly!
Exactly it's not our responsibility to fix or life the black community
You're talking smack about women who look like you? ... shaming them? but you're all respectful and sympathetic towards the same passport women the bros left to be with?! Talking about you support them and their CAUSES. You're weak!
Ashtavious 🤣🤣. Girl!!
The “curious” baby near the end will learn, smdh… The COMMUNITY HAS BEEN ON THE BACKS OF WOMEN for centuries, and now we are politely exiting the load bearing position.
What a great way to phrase it: load-bearing position. So true!
I could like this comment a thousand times……….yep, BW are done.
Statistics don't lie: happiest demographics are married men & single women.
Demographics that are the least happiest: single men & married women.
The statistics don't lie.
What if the stastics are false.
@12:40 "At what point, is what you want, more important than the needs of our community?" The day I was born. I am NOT a sacrifice for the "Black Cause". My body, my choice. Why should I be okay with my female body being taken and used for other people's benefit? Also, her fight is with capitalism, not women.
I stand with female community over whatever socioeconomic, racial, nationalist, political tie with men. Laboring for those made up divides ain't worth it. Being female is something real and universal even on a stranded island. Men can have their own imaginary spats, change their skidmark diapers, wipe their bums and cook themselves tendies alone. Why should I care? What do I get back for mothering them or birthing more soldiers to be labor ants for their BS? Abuse, disrespect, clipped wings and stolen time, that's what.
Be alone! Be alone be alone! It’s mysterious and magical. The whole ‘oh poor you, you’re so lonely’ it’s utter GASLIGHT!
I LOVE this ❗️
Food for thought: men had all opportunities to get education, money, study psychology and philosophy to better themselves for thousands of years, but women when given this chance did it in about the last 200 years 🤷♂️
exactly- thats why they wanted us out and fought to keep us out, are fighting now and throwing tantrums. look at everything women have achieved even with only 100 or so years to vote? To receive education? Only 50 years to be able to open a credit card in our own name !!! 🙏💗🌷 Women are amazing, and men have always been jealous of that. Of our reproductive power (the beginnings of misogyny) and our intellectual/emotional/spiritual/etc etc power ...
EXACTLY RIGHT.
The woman saying that we need to prioritize the community has clearly never been in a relationship with an abusive black man. It's easy to say what she's saying when you're an outsider looking at other women, from your perspective, probably just "being picky because they can be." Black women don't want these broken black men because they are a literal threat to our lives sometimes and it's not really our responsibility to take them in just for the community. It's not like we can fix them. Any therapist would tell you that right away, that it's not your job to fix other people. She should be advocating for these males to fix themselves instead of trying to get women to take them.
As a WW, your saying "Why should I be okay with my female body being taken and used for other people's benefit?" hit me so hard knowing the history of what BW have experienced throughout the history of the US. Although as a WW, I can never truly understand the extent of the suffering black women have experienced, I can feel it in my bones when I think about it. What you experience must be overwhelming, and to be told that you need to continue to suffer and take on the load is not something that you should have to hear. BW have suffered enough. ❤
What if a lot of men are being lied on on false allegations?
12:16 what is she getting to exactly???she sounds like shes telling these women to take one for the team...hell no!
The way I screamed at this comment!!!! 😂😅😂😅😂 She’s essentially saying take one for the home team as you said 😂😅😂😅😂
If she wants to save the community, she can have 15 kids and leave us alone. Personally, I don't really care what happens to society or the black community after I'm in the ground. The whole human race can go extinct and what will I care about it while I'm turning into fertilizer?
And what's with "vain expectations?" Is she posing this question to the men who are out here being players until they hear a joint creak?
She should take one for the team , I support her. Build the community, my queen 👸 🙌 ❤️
Black Women have taken too much for the 'team'. Much too many 'come up women'
The girl at 14:00 is an opp 😂
Pick-Me for sure 😒😑
😂😂😂
It comes down to this. Men, any age, cannot handle a woman he has to compete with and their bar is set SO low, they act as if we are doing this on purpose when we are just out here living our lives.
This
Males that believe they have to compete with a woman is a huge red flag and concerning. However, when males need something taken care of who do they come to…… the women they compete with. Make it make sense. ❤
They refuse to date pickmeshias on their level . They want successful women to upgrade off of , so they can afford an ig side chick . 😂🎉 They don't want us , they want to use our cars & debit cards . But , oops , we don't want them 😂🎉.
Synonyms for Alone include uniquely and exclusively. The very way they make alone seem like an inherently negative thing tells me it is purely projection. I love being alone 🥰 my company is fantastic and I’m sure a ton of other ladies feel the same 💕 cheers to us 🥂
From the lil old ladies gallery - U got that right, child!
We keep up w/our friends, our friends' appts, younger relatives, hobbies, plants, pets, day excursions, brunches & sometimes *gentlemen* callers. Some of us still travel. And we celebrate our friends lives when they pass.
Enjoy your life, on your terms - it isn't a dress rehearsal.
Absolutely. I have so much fun alone. When I desire company, I make plans with other women. We have a great time. Afterward, we embrace, say I love you, and check on each other to assure our safe arrival home. Not lonely at all.
@fantym1633 Bravo, and well said.
I like this!❤❤
What youre doing is purely projection. And creating nothing but animosity in the world. Enjoy having that permanent angry face 🤣
BM really think we are bothered by them not doing anything for us or wanting us. We are dancing in the streets with joy! 💃🏽💃🏽💃🏽
People standing up for their wants and needs not to be treated like crap are standing up for the rights of their community and of future generations to live free of misery.
So true! Setting a good example is so important!
This is so underrated. Families that create healthy dynamics actually do make the planet a better place.
But we all fall short here and there, we’re all works in progress.
But yes, definitely hell no to the extremes like abuse.
16:32 respectfully sis acts like blk women haven’t already settled… the stats prove BW are holding the weight of the community on their shoulders. BM are not community focused.
Yeah, and when you settle, you're told that you should have chosen better when things fall apart. 🙄
14:14 No single momma's, no broken homes, hopefully less dv because dv happens within the home. The bc have so little wealth Because Of Whooo? Single mother's because of Whooo?
Thank you! That pick me is so blinded. The blacks in US are here because they were all settling. The new generation will do better now.
Her concern is so misplaced. I think she means well, but is too male centered to see reality right now.
And DV escalates during pregnancy. Ladies please be safe
Married twice, but now on my own at 43 for the first time since 25. Its so....peaceful. I can breathe, and Ill never give up breathing again
I was never scared of being alone. Lol I have great platonic relationships with people. I never thought marriage and procreation was the end goal of life. I feel like that idea is outdated.
Girlfriend asking “where does that leave the black community?” can put the community on her back and save it herself. Once again placing all of the responsibility and burden on black women instead of encouraging black men to just be better! No ma’am we won’t do it.
I know that's right. She can mule with the other pickmes.
it's a vicious cycle and no one wants to take responsibility and in the end everyone is a loser.
@@Childfree334your insufferable
@DominantBtch OK. And? Am I supposed to care about the useless opinion of some random stranger? You don't know me or pay my bills. 🖕🏾
17:44 "Men, do you think we're bluffing?" 😂 THIS. ALL. DAY. Cause we're not. (If we want a kid that badly, we could hypothetically adopt one of the millions worldwide that men abandon to the streets and foster system. IF.)
Men didn't abandon their child.
@@yashyashwanth5888as a social worker, I can 100% tell you, YES THEY DID.
The big guy was making sense. But the girl after talking about the black community is talking foolishness. The reason there are so many black single mothers is because so many DID settle. They got a man just to have one and he still left. They thought about the community and tried to build up a black man and when he was up he left. Why doesn't anyone talk to men about being better men and actual husbands?? Why aren't black men held accountable for the state of the black community?
That's a great point.
In many of those situations, it wasnt the man who left. It was the man who got left....mostly because they were violent, unproductive, abusive, controlling, unfaithful, or crazy.
The folks telling women to settle…I wonder if THEY want to be the ones women “settle” for. Who wants to be somebody’s participation trophy? 😂 😂 🏆
I know a man that was going to join the Mormon church even though he didn't believe any of it just because they promised him a wife.
They do not care if you are even actually interested.
Oh, I think they absolutely DO want to be someone’s “participation trophy”; that’s why they care so much and push back so hard against women saying they’re good without being paired up. They care because if enough women break free from societal expectations & are happy without being paired up, they know they won’t be one of the lucky few to trap a woman. They NEED women to “settle” or they have no shot.
Where were all these people when black women were being degraded and disrespected? Why does the black community only have a problem that needs to be addressed when it’s the black men suffering and not the women??
Did you notice that everything that she listed as to why there's a problem in the community is directly responsible for why women don't want to deal with any more men
Men are not the problem.dont act like you are the victim.even though if men treat you good and nice you will say I feel like he is too perfect and boring.i seen 100 if cases where a women say he is too perfect.
Girl with dreads is a pick me she should settle then
And she said a whole lot of nothing.
@@noneofyourbusiness5650Sadly I thought she started off good but then she went full Pickme mood and I checked out after that
@@noneofyourbusiness5650 Exactly. Had to fast forward because I was tired of her gibberish.
12:17 what she does not understand is that having a better quality man and woman in a relationship they by default produce a better quality family for a child. Back in the day poor genetics and shitty men were bred out. Her saying that "settling" would be the solution to the community is delusional given that our community is currently full of people who have settled and the state of our community is ridiculous. And no ma'am you can not grow to love and be with "anyone". There will always be sacrificial lambs who are willing to do things for the sake of the community, but today other's will not. If the community as a whole refuse to do better then crumbled it shall be.
It’s crazy how they always have an excuse to why the males aren’t fully adults from being in a single mother home yet the women are capable of being full adults, and if they’re not, they don’t have an excuse as to why besides your father wasn’t in a home, so why you can’t say that when it comes to the man
Women are fully adults ha ha funny.
That man said it so BEAUTIFULLY, that I just had to listen to him twice! The last woman mirrors my sentiment exactly. Because at this point I truly DO NOT CARE about going extinct or losing "our" community. That pickme chick was too exhausting to get through, but basically I gather she is talking to the wrong audience about the state/future of "the community"...she needs to ask BM about that one. Because BW BEEN trying to save it and hold it together.
The world: women need to choose better! Choose better! Choose better!
Women: ok.
The world: No! You need to settle.
FYI: Everyone dies alone unless you are dying in a horrible crash, otherwise, you go alone. If they mean they will die by your side? Well, they usually die first, so I am confused. I guess they mean, so they don't want to die alone. OH WELL!!! Get a dog, they will miss you when you are gone.
There are lots of adoptable animals in shelters that are labeled "Not adoptable to men".
That chick in the black shirt .. dont know WTF shes talking about . . Smgdh lmao 😂😂
They want us to settle..for their type. If we have standards it disqualifies a majority of them. They are more afraid of being alone than they say we are.
Men are easy to get 🤷🏾♀️ we can change our minds at any moment…
Masculine men won't match your statement.This is why men are not being nice and good.dont feminize men then we can say whether men won't change their mind
What delusationality.
It’s the fact that they think that a man who is a nice decent human being that doesn’t cheat is a perfect man. No, he’s a normal person.
Community is dead in today's world. All anyone ever does is hurt others. It's honestly best to just literally be by yourself most times.
There are good men out there. But they are few and far, far between. The Ivy League sets boundaries to admission and you meet it or don't attend. This is the same. It's a correction to a skewed system that allowed men to not meet the basic standards. For instance, due to the one child policy in China, men that want to get married to Chinese women must be educated, have a good job and a house in order to be considered eligible marriage partners. Why do so many people expect us to continue to tolerate abuse, neglect, high work loads, and financial struggle to be with a man? For sex and protection? Most married people aren't having sex and a man can't be with you all the time to protect you. So, you're going to have to protect yourself. Women are told to accept cheating. Therefore, you're going to be alone and sexless while he's satisfying his other partner. Learn self control over your body and turn yourself into a weapon. It's all on you regardless. The world is in horrible shape, people are crazier than ever, living is so expensive. WHY bring an innocent into this muck? I think that's selfish.
"It's a correction to a skewed system that allowed men to not meet the basic standards." is such an important thing to articulate. Sometimes people just need to hear someone else say something that actually is very obvious.
Maria actually looked pained while the one woman was talking.
As a wife in healthy, happy, loving marriage I fully support the continued rejection of the old ways of stigmatizing single women past their early 30s and the continued rejection of considering it a status symbol to be a man’s fiancée/wife. Single ladies refuse to tolerate B.S!!!!
Exactly. If it ain’t what I was _promised,_ I don’t want it. I don’t do the bait and switch. And what I want is _always_ more important than a “community” that makes it *more* than clear it doesn’t give a 💩 about Me. As a Woman _or_ even a Person.
How will the community look after I'm dead? I don't care. I choose not to settle. Go find your match.
I have always had a problem with everyone concluding that a woman that is not married or not in a relationship with a man is somehow "alone" as they put it. Everything has to be about being in a romantic relationship of some kind. You are not alone because you are unmarried or not in a relationship with a man, considering that there is so much to life, like raising your children, spending time with grandchildren, pursuing one's career aspirations, pursuing your favorite hobbies, etc. However, most women have been socialized to believe that having and keeping a man is the ultimate achievement in life.
I feel like a lot of what that women was saying needed to be said to men
I'm sure they are watching.
@@xxarianahiltonxx5116Right, they stay in women’s business. 😂
Why? They don't listen. And some of them you may not want to tell in person because they're the ones that are truly scared of dying alone and if they think you're the reason, they'll probably react badly to you saying that.
@@Liz-wz8dh that's true.
@Liz-wz8dh very true such a mess
The pickmeshia is still too young to understand. # men don't change . We've tried for decades & now we've given up . We will focus on ourselves. 😊❤ # 4B # 5G . Ladies , get carry permits # stay ready , there's no time to get ready 😢
To the lady asking about "where will this leave our community" .
Sis have you been looking around, there is NO BLACK COMMUNITY. Women with standards will be a course correction. The births will stop and SOMEONE will have to step up and be BETTER!!!!
I'm Gen X, I've never married, no children. I dont regret it. I feel absolutely no obligation to continue the black community or the human race. In fact at this point it irresponsible to have children in the environment.
This is the manosphere's worst fear - women who straight up DGAF about being on their own
actually they dont fear that
The older I get, the more dying alone sounds better than dying with a HUGE chunk of the men I've met.
Literally 😂
If black man don’t travel, where were they going to use their passport?
It’s mostly just for show anyway. They keep saying they’re leaving, and yet…still here.
In the words of the late Whitney Houston "I'd rather be alone than unhappy."
The lady with the short sleeve black shirt is placing the heaviest burden of upholding the black community on the wrong shoulders…the black woman. For generations we’ve settled for just enough or worse even less or nothing at all. Where has that led us as a community by giving up our entire bodies, minds, psyches, wholeness and peace? The community has not healed nor grown in recent generations. By demanding better, wanting better and not giving so freely and easily that incentivizes men to make changes and hold some self accountability for their actions or lack thereof. (That is not to say women don’t have things we need to work on, we do as well.) But by wanting more for yourself you’ll more likely receive more in return. No one is free from learning by actions shown by others. Complacency is a recipe for an infinity circle of disappointment, pain, ambivalence, bitterness and anger that’ll continue to plague generations to come. So people, especially the ladies….continue to want more for yourself. Don’t settle….
Truth Proven Fact 💯 Point
I’m not settling for a dam thing 🤣
Because I have built my own paradise and any man i allow into my life , will be ADDING to my life .
Everything I ask for and want , I also have so why would I invite others into my life to bring misery to me?
I swear it NEVER ends with these PickMe’s . I text my older sis , how’s your day going? Her response: my brother in law getting on her nerves. 🤨
My friends if we meet up , the first hour they talking about how miserable they are . Only to piggyback and say “ that’s marriage it has ups and downs “ 🤨 ma’am yall ups and downs been more DOWN then anything, TF.
Then of course I get the “you’re not married you wouldn’t understand because marriage isn’t always perfect “
They really believe that nonsense, as if I’ve never been in exclusive relationships that were long term .
Yet , they always want to get away to my peaceful home in order to “get away” .
I mean make it make sense ? I’m not about to be sitting around miserable. That occurs with people who can’t provide and pay these bills alone or they just desperately want regular se(x) which is low vibrational AF.
My best friend will literally complain and then some how mention the se(x) 🤨
Another friend spent Over an hour complaining about her BF and then say his 🍆 doesn’t work because of uncontrolled diabetes. So , I asked why stay with him if you not happy AND he can’t please you ? I received “crickets “.
Another friend , her husband works out of the country . He has cheated multiple times on her , and had the audacity to send a pic of GF to her. 🤨 why does she stay? She can’t afford to go anywhere.
I mean it’s sickening and I’m not about to be bamboozled .
If anyone is a follower of the Bible , it clearly says there will be a time when the woman who did not bear children will be called BLESSED. And it’s BETTER to remain SINGLE, but if you are with a lot of lust then you should marry.
I’m good over here!
I HAVE A CAT, HE IS MORE MAN THEN ANY MALE I EVER DEALT WITH…LOLOLOLOLO…SO HAPPY TO BE SINGLE AN NOBODY’S SLAVE!
These men are missing the point of the person your going to be with should make your life better. But men don't do that. 4B World 💪🏾👑🥰
I think what people fail to understand is that when you settle you end up creating a broken home and single motherhood because you take bare minimum that is not enough to sustain a family. Women have settled and that is what creates the brokenness. When women have standards and boundaries they ask the man to bring more which most times create great families since you had so much respect for yourself since you didn’t settle and therefore your husband respects you and children respect themselves. Period.
I am glad women are realizing this! I have been decentering men and living the 4b life all this time, and I will continue to do so, God willing. We need to reveal these truths to all women, and I am doing my part here on CZcams too with my new channel. I started it for my AI art of Black women and girls but I started putting decentering men info too. We need to wake up, ladies, and take our lives back.
Edit- thank you so much for your support. I appreciate you all and I hope you don’t mind that I don’t speak in my videos. My voice is not the best (health reasons) but I still wanted to help support my fellow women with the information I learned from researching men for years. Thank you again and God bless❤️
I subscribed to you, boo. I like what you're doing with your channel. Keep your head up, darling. 🌺❤️✨
@@NovaPrincess Thank you so much! I appreciate you, beautiful❤️💐🥰
15 years here decentered from men
I subscribed as well. I'm a WW but wholeheartedly support BW, so I hope that it's OK that I join the conversation. If not, please let me know, and I'll unsubscribe. I understand that there are some places where BW might want to just have the space to themselves.
@@smlorrin hello, thank you and we will be glad to have your support, as we all benefit when we realize that we are worth more than the crumbs men give us in relationships. Being respectful and understanding is all we ask, please feel free to share your thoughts 😊
When anyone says, "ThInK oF tHe CoMmuniTy!" I feel like they don't view those they are addressing as stakeholders in that community whose needs are also worth considering. It's like trying to manipulate a mother wanting something for herself by framing her as outside of the interests of family, like she wasn't part of the family too.
14:39 “exceptionally higher standards than necessary” Girl, goodbye.
That's right, ladies. This video is everything. I wish it viral.
Me too. ❤
14:53 this scarce ass mindset… it will leave us with more *happy* connected families with less trauma!!! i’d rather that than a bunch of subpar relationships and people pairing up just to say they have someone. 🙄
16:15 this is so sad and untrue. many of us are at this point because we gave into that mindset and saw that *no* you can’t grow with someone if they don’t have the same value, intentions, goals, life vision, emotional intelligence, so on and so forth. and many women settled for the okay or nice guy just for him to want to use his gf as a bang maid/mommy. not caring about actually nourishing the relationship. that’s disney princess thinking.
On the flip side, what do those lonely men contribute to community? Do they volunteer? Or are they just at home, playing video games, complaining how lonely they are? Just asking. Again, the responsibility of keeping the community together falls on women. We are tired, y'all.