Melba Martinez: People Stare At Me No Matter What, So I Might As Well Give Them a Show
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- čas přidán 27. 08. 2024
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In this episode, Queer, Latinx Melba Martinez debunks the painful misconceptions and stereotypes that all too often come along with being fat. She shows us that you can exist in a bigger body and still have show-stopping style, love hiking and dancing, value life and stand firmly in your worth, despite being told otherwise and relentlessly marginalized from a young age.
Melba’s secret to healing from society’s incessant judgements is in admitting her hurt. While she still suffers from depression, not pushing down her feelings has liberated her from longer periods of darkness, just as not depriving herself from food and instead learning to eat intuitively has liberated her from dimming her life force by obsessing on fitting a mold she’ll never fit in.
Ultimately, by trusting in herself, Melba has found her power to shine from within.
“I posted a photo of myself. Someone commented, ‘You deserve to die because you don't care about yourself.’ I actually love life. I think I'm one of the most lively people that I know. That assumption that I don't care about my life… I'm like, I actually know that I'm more alive than you are because I'm caring. And I want to create a world where everybody can be as authentically themselves as possible."
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#Fatphobia #StyleLikeU #WhatsUnderneath
It's sad that when you explain your story, people still try to explain why you're wrong or why the way that you feel about your experience is wrong.
maybe she should eat less
its so patronizing. like who the hell are you to tell me how i feel about my own experiences? it angers me how people get so audacious and entitled that way.
These episodes are such an emotional rollercoaster for me. I'm heartbroken by the things people have gone through, but refreshed by seeing how they've come alive and the way that they continue to become more and more alive.
Agreed!
Our struggles can often lead us to our most powerful selves!! xo
@@elisagoodkind7694 I am my best self because I'm so perfectly imperfect 🧡
I feel less alone after watching.
So sick of people being nasty about a person's size
Says the other overweight person ok sis
I know exactly what she means about society’s reactions feeding the mental illness and bedrooms being the only havens of safety. People assume sometimes that we are the originators of our own shame and pain and that’s not always the case. I believe her when she said she never had the problem with her body, that others did. That’s how we all start out.
This channel is so important! Everyone I watch either makes me feel happy and empowered or it makes me want to be a better person. Both are awesome things to takeaway! X
Thank you! xoxo
You are soooo right! Thanks and Love to every Wonderful heart out there! 💞
I relate to the paralysing depression. It worsens each time you try to snap yourself out of it. Cannot ignore the hurt. "Care for the wound to your soul". I love that. ❤
I love seeing someone whose body resembles mine in a series like this. Representation is such an important part of liberation for us all. I appreciated what Melba said about how the liberation will probably not come in her lifetime -- I'm older and I agree, I think it's going to take generations-- but what we are doing now is for that future we believe is possible, just, and necessary. So much love and respect to you, Melba Martinez 💗
So glad you feel seen! Sending lots of love xo
I love your attitude. Your awsum 🌷
Love you back. 😍💯
She's beautiful inside out
I'm a heavy woman and has always been comfortable with me, because I've always had and known through my spirit that I'm beautiful and have heard it all my life and still do even today I just don't like it when people make other people feel down about themselves it's beautiful to see these people stand up and feel beautiful and magical about themselves. Peace and Blessings to them all🙏🏾♥️
I f**#ing love this series. It is giving me confidence and permission to be myself and "adorn" my body in whatever way expresses my identity, individuality and soul regardless as to what other people or even my inner critic think. And acknowledge that can evolve and change every day.
I feel like I’m looking at someone who is unapologetically themselves, and this is what we need more of in the world
"My body is home" I loved that statement. Thank you for your gift of insight and vulnerability. Thank you, Melba.
Then love the body and don't abuse it.
I know someone who has PCOS and the symptoms Melba spoke of sound like those. I hope she will consider looking into this. I am NOT trying to diagnose or change her, I am solely offering a suggestion to aid in her continual uplifted journey
Melba is seriously gorgeous, and -if I may- her body is beautiful. I have a pretty big but hidden physical disability that wasn't diagnosed until I was 29, and this diagnosis made me finally understand why I couldn't play or keep up in sports like my schoolmates in HS could. Like, Melba, I finally found a physical activity that made me uncover my body's true strength, and the high I get from this is unlike anything that I can explain. Our bodies are seriously amazing, and yours is too, Melba!
"My body deserves to be adorned in the ways that I want it to be adorned" 💖💖💖
She’s so beautiful this made my YEAR
So happy to hear! xo
Love seeing this beautiful gal, her personality, clothing, make up she’s the kind of friend I love to have. Love yourself no matter shape, size, color of skin your are. ❤️🙏🏽
'I have to push through this, the more I ignore it the bigger it gets'. No truer words were ever said. You have such a nice face, and nice everything!! Regardless of different reasons, I was also bullied. Don't take s**t from ANYONE💪🏽💃🏻🏋🏽♀️💥💚💙
We love this from Melba too, it's such an empowering message! xo
I LOVE that Melba is so positive and strong, that she takes pictures of herself. You are so beautiful, Melba, inside and out.
Thank you, Melba. Listening to your story and words of youthful wisdom inspires an old broad like me to accept and love this big beautiful aging body of mine that’s racked with constant pain and increasing limitations. But, as I battle through life’s daily difficulties I realize that my body is a work of art especially made for me to live life to its fullest...Peace and Love
Beautiful.
I love it when women talk about the ability to “shape shift” as a way to describe how different we can look on any given day. ❤️❤️❤️🌸
In tears. Thank you for gracing us with your beautiful expression of mind, heart, and body. A truly sacred trinity. You are inspiring. Keep allowing yourself to unfold and blossom, brave soul.
This video resonated with me on a deeper level even though we don’t have the same body type I understood a lot about the getting so deep in depression and not wanting to even try to take care of yourself and also getting ready and dressed up and because I deal with a chronic illness i that requires pain management at a young age I understand the frustration and embarrassment that comes with people and school nurses questioning and comparing what you go through to others or making statements that have nothing to do with your life I’ve also been through that with family and I understand completely dating someone that’s toxic because you’re finally being noticed I’m still on a journey of self love and it’s not easy but this video helped me in a lot of way thanks for sharing your story
Really love what you wrote here. X hope you're having a great pain free day. ❤️
As a fellow sufferer of chronic illness/pain, I'm over here wishing you a painless and happy life. < 3
@@charliethecockatoo2159 aww thank you 😭🥰
You are so beautiful, Melba. This was wonderful. Thank you for being so open, I loved hearing everything you had to say.
I'm grateful for this. I resonate with others telling me that my body is wrong and wanting to disappear because of it. 💗🦋
That fuzzy bandeau top looks so comfortable. This woman is a goddess. So amazing to hear her story.
Thank you so much Melba for sharing and for putting yourself in a vulnerable position, showing us that vulnerability can be a superpower. My body looks like yours and I think you are absolutely beautiful, inside and out. Thank you for sharing your truth and your energy. And thank you @stylebyU for celebrating diversity.
Thank you for creating those interviews and thank you to the people who share their story.
Your videos have now accompanied me for years and they have such a grounding effect for my body image and put the feeling towards the way that I look in a really healthy perspective
The last question is my favorite because the answers are always so beautiful
You are so welcome and thank you so much for being here. Sending love xo
I ve always been a shrill oblique and very creative person. I was brought up to always be kind and friendly. When I was 11 my classmates hated me, bullied me. I became anorectic. Later in life I always tried to proof to others that I'm worthy. I was starving myself, attended university, raised my child alone. I got so terribly sick, that I had to leave university due to an operation, just before I gratuaded.
Today I went looking for clothes, I gained so much weight, nothing fits me no more. And I hated myself again.
Testimonys like this bring me so much comfort and trust into humanity..
Be a decent human, be who u are.. And whoever doesn't love u as who you are, kick them out of your life..
Especially today I m pretty thankful for this Chanel ❤️🍀
OKAY FIRST OF ALL THIS OUTFIT- IMPECCABLE
Thank you Melba for sharing your story with us 🤍✨
In a way I can not describe, it makes my soul feel free hearing her words.
This was so beautiful thank you Melba! I particularly loved your reflections on your sadness around your grandmother. And your expression of feeling beautiful when puffing on a hike ! I too feel that feeling of beautiful-ness when sweaty and hot bushwalking ☀️
chills from her words and all the self work they have done. thanks to all
Love to see her confident and beautiful person. Love yourself is the message. And ignore the hateful people, they are sad themself.
Mad respect to her!!! I love her in every way!!! Keep pushing forward with your persona
You aren't disposable. 💗
this last sentence is so powerful and hugely inspires me! Thank you Melba! Thank you Elisa & Lily.
Haven't finished watching this but just wanna say my first impression or sense of the outfit is it feels like a natural, authentic extension of this person's personality and I like the concept of leading with a first impression like that which is true to the self. It makes a statement of color, texture, lines and I feel inspired by that. To me I perceive that visual message as: fun, vibrant, festive, confident, body-positive, friendly, and brings to my mind colors more popular in certain cultures and countries than as often in America. Beyond that visual communication, there's so much I see valuable about the verbal communication here. "My body is home."
This CZcams channel is amazing. Very strong. Very honest. Very hard. Very inspiring.
Yes! Yes! Yes! Thank you for sharing. Loved the cadence of expression. Passionate, caring, soft & fierce!!
I'm so sorry for all your pain and suffering.
What an incredibly beautiful woman you are Melba Martinez! You are such an inspiration for us all. Much love and appreciation for who you are, in your body!!!
I love this project and the stories. I can relate to almost every one, each person cracks me open, and I overcome internal hurdles. 🙏🙏🏾🙏🏼🙏🏿🙏🏾🙏🏻❣️
She is stunning, and her words flow beautifully. 😍👌🙏
Took the words right out of my mouth. Literally.
@@katrinamoss4834 😘
I can't believe the awful things people say to others. I get called names and I now have nothing to do with those sort of people there is more to life and people than your size. Let people be.
❤️ ty for doing this video melba :) loved listening to everything you had to say
This is the best conversation to date
What a sweetheart! And I can't believe people actually think they need to inform other people they have gained weight . As if they don't know!
Treat spiritual wounds as you would physical ones
I'm so careful about what I say to children and especially teens. I've been told I enable extra sensitivity. The truth is, I remember adults telling me s#÷t that shouldn't have been told to me at anytime in my life, but especially, in such a critical development stage! It's something I flipped and took power over. Melba is a boss!
I just love you, Melba! ( I don't need to know you for that!)And we all see you! Thank you for sharing. Keep strong and beautiful as you are. Love & peace.
I love the complete honesty about both the good and the challenges, thank you
This touched on so many levels for me. I can’t thank you enough for this particular video. ❤️ Sending them love.
Thank you!!!! You are such a positive inspiration!!!! You are a work of art...
Love 💕 love 💕 love 💕 this series #lifelessons #selflove #thankyou
Imagine if we could wake up in a world where we could re create/reinvent our selves everyday… constantly changing..evolving…not giving a shit what anyone thinks… some days I’m dark and goth, others I feel feminine and romantic… style should be the way you express yourself without saying anything… I think that’s what this world needs.. more visual … less verbal…. A society where everyone feels so entitled to their opinions being heard no matter how hurtful they are, judging before knowing someone’s story… it’s sad…it’s suffocating… judging someone just because they aren’t you’re version of normal.. maybe you should check yourself… because there is no normal… just brain washed views of what it should be
thank you for the authenticity
They have such cool style and I love their tattoos!
Eyeshadow + earrings =🧡👌
Grandma💗...
Up da mountains, yay
💟What a fabulous collection of interviews you're compiling! L💜VE!!! Do you have a video explaining your selection process/ inspirations and such??? 💟
XO,
Violet
I love seeing someone living their life...
thank you Melba! really beautiful thoughts in there!
I am so proud of this woman! She is strong, willing, and learning to love herself. We can all take lessons from her!
THE ALL FUR LOOK IS EVERYTHING 🙌🏼
So much love and Respect to you Queen!!❤❤❤ Never let anyone change you...your perfect just the way you are!!
I absolutely love these! They challenge us to see beauty as it’s presented and not in a comparative perception!!!
Radiant brilliant light
So eloquent. Raises great points. A sweetheart.
Loooove this human! Everyone matters!
Wow remembering the time my doctor told me I was wrong for gaining weight during puberty. That was very wrong of her to think and even worse to say.
uplifting :) thank you!!
My body is home. That was deep. I received that.
In spite of ..... She is a beautiful soul speaking her truth.
Can we just have more humans like this one please? Because she is absolutely magnetic! And funky, colourful, intelligent, caring….
Thank you so much for this incredible series and for all of your wonderful guests 💐💐
Also, the fatphobia and ignorance in the medical community is horrendous and literally costs people their lives. It’s appalling and so much needs to be done.
Melba is really beautiful - inside and out. Her (hope that's the right pronoun, sorry Melba if it isn't) skin is luminous! PCOS is really bloody annoying to deal with, the insulin resistance makes weight loss or maintenance a real challenge and as Melba said all to often the assumption is that your diet is full of the "wrong" foods when that's not correct. XXX much love to this gorgeous human! 💝❤️🌞
Your beautiful inside and out, keep being you💕🌹
So beautiful, so touching.
Seeing the thumbnail I legit thought they were two different people. I was waiting for the second person to appear 😂
RESPECT!!!!!!!!!!! I'm much smaller than her, have major issues with my body. I am very self conscience and insecure about it. I could never summon up the courage to underdress down to my "chones" in front of the whole world.
How humans treat other Humans makes me so sick, Lucky I am a goddess mermaid.
This was awesome
I love that: how is it unhygienic for me not to shave but hygenic for cis men not shave!?
Great video! Love your attitude and confidence, life is just way too short! I too have PCOS along with all of my sisters and we recently have started taking a supplement called inositol and it is such a gamechanger! I'm surprised that a doctor never mentioned it to me, but then again not surprised because I think they want to focus on what they can prescribe and make money on. Anyway, not a doctor, but when I come across a fellow "cyster" I feel obliged to pass this info along. Take care beautiful lady, and keep doing you!
Inositol is great! I also take NAC with lots of herbs.
Gorgeous 💖!!!
.. people stare at me all the time too..I'm assuming it's cause I'm hot..so what do you suggest I do????
you bring me so much joy girl, I mean it xxx
She is so Beautiful and Powerful!! 💜👏🏾👏🏾
Thanks for the video!
🙏😘🙏 I LOVE THIS AMAZING BEAUTIFUL GEM 💎...ESTAS BELLA MUJER...🌹 ERES MUY LINDA MELBA MARTINEZ...GOD BLESS YOU MAGICAL GORGEOUS WOMAN...🙏😘🙏
As they said...magical!
Those colours are everything 🥰
So happy at the end, answering why at this body. She is so happy!!!! I love that!!!!
I love you Melba!!!! ❤✊😊
The first 1,000 people to use this link will get a 1 month free trial of Skillshare: skl.sh/stylelikeu08211
BEAUTIFUL
You don’t have to defend your love for life. Even if you were miserable, your life matters. All lives do
I wonder if CZcams did this on purpose. But when there was a commercial it was about weight loss. Coincidence? Anyway, I enjoyed hearing about her and learning a different perspective.
Thank you for sharing sadly this was exactly my experience only im not queer but still i struggle the same in many ways. Please keep your head up sweetie and if you need someone to listen i know im a stranger but i would gladly be a friend 💜
She is so Beautiful to me! I just want to give her a big hug!💕🤗
My favorite color is pink.