GOP Moderates Take Down Jim Jordan | Trump Freaks Out As Powell, Chesebro Flip
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- čas přidán 3. 05. 2024
- Stephen Colbert is back, and the House of Representatives still doesn’t have a speaker, and the former president is watching his co-defendants cut plea deals in Georgia. #Colbert #Comedy #Monologue
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Stephen Colbert brings his signature satire and comedy to THE LATE SHOW with STEPHEN COLBERT, the #1 show in late night, where he talks with an eclectic mix of guests about what is new and relevant in the worlds of politics, entertainment, business, music, technology and more. Featuring bandleader Louis Cato and “THE LATE SHOW band,” the Peabody Award-winning and Emmy Award-nominated show is broadcast from the historic Ed Sullivan Theater. Stephen Colbert took over as host, executive producer and writer of THE LATE SHOW on Sept. 8, 2015. - Zábava
"Jim Jordan will not be speaker of the House."
THUNDEROUS APPLAUSE
That is enough to give a man hope right there.
Yep! 💙
This is how liberty lives on, with thunderous applause. For now.
i dont believe any Republnazi buys tickets for his show!
@@Arltratlo Why would they, they are humorless cowards.
Colbert sucks... remember when late night talk show was actually funny??? nobody cares about politics thats why their ratings are down the toilet.... when normal people turn on the TV and see these clowns crying about Trump it just makes his popularity go up lol so pathetic and bland
Well if she’s not his attorney, there’s no att/client privilege, thanks, Donny. 😂
👏👏👏😂
He's not too bright!
Neither is she, that's the problem. She's.nit going to be an ally for the other side
Well there's no attorney-client privilege anyway when you're planning a crime with your attorney and she goes out and does it. Regardless, it's hard to fathom what new stupidity we're supposed to latch onto with this anyway. "She's not my attorney" - so freakin' what? Are you dropping the "advice of counsel" defense then? It would have been better to say she's definitely my attorney and whatever I did was per her advice. He's a moron.
She was or was not his attorney, depending on the day and circumstances. Donnie's reality is whatever he wants it to be at any given moment.
As of an hour ago…THREE of his lawyers have flipped! 😆🎉🇺🇸
It's as if they just realised breaking the law is bad for lawyers too!
Enjoy USA been along time coming ❤🇦🇺
“Elf from another shelf” was a SLAM DUNK of a joke 😂
My prediction:
Trump: "Powell couldn't have been my attorney because I never paid her." LOL.
Yeah, he publicly told a few lies, but there were never any documents, is my bet too.
Donald Fraud doesn't produce documents, he only steals them.
⚰
He already claimed he doesn’t know her as predicted
Defense Attorney will simply ask her to produce the signed hiring agreement that has tRUMPs signature...she can't because he doesn't leave paper trails. Handshakes don't count. He is a slippery POS.
😂😂😂😂😂😂
"Elf from another shelf". OMG that made a dismal Monday so much easier to bear.
Welcome back Mr. Colbert & you have the *best* writers in the universe ❤
Thank you, Evie, for sending Stephen back to work
So happy Stephen is feeling better! He has been missed
Covid 3 times? That's pretty awful.
Oh for sure! He is around alot of people...I work at a University and we are always getting some kind of sick.@@Tina-qp7py
@@Tina-qp7py especially for Pfizers top propagandist salesman
True that!
SO GLAD YOU ARE OK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We missed you!!!!
Same! I am so happy to see him back
Yep, same here also.
Absolutely! 💙
I know!!! And we had just gotten him back after so long.
Turning the Powell joke into Trump confusing invincibility with invisibility is pure comedic genius.
And yet they didn't see the obvious "Pratt is a pratt" joke. These writers are very confusing.
"Nobody stands in Guiliani's splash zone pro bono." Priceless 😆
Hey, I used to be shift manager at a McDonald's. I guess I'm qualified to be a Supreme Court Justice.
You have to leave something for the fry guys and grease trap cleaners.
You maybe more qualified than some Republican judicial candidates.
I once ran the broiler at a Burger King. Secretary of the Interior, maybe?
@@humbleevidenceaccepter7712 If you could be trusted with the broiler, I think Secretary of Defense.
I can't believe the House Republicans tried to downplay Jordan's failures as a legislator and a protector and force him into the Speaker's seat. There's seriously no floor to their hypocrisy or immorality.
Well, according to all of them, he's the "second most popular Republican in the country." 🤣🤣
“Force him into the speaker seat”???
Not to mention being one of the main co conspirators in Trumps attack on democracy.
Listening a democrat talking about morality and hypocrisy is like listening a chimpanzee talking about quantum chemistry.
You can't believe the GOP were trying to install a pupper speaker despite his flaws professionally, personally, and legislatively
Stephen Colbert is brilliant. And the show truly has the greatest writers in late night TV. Love it.
Thank God for Stephen Colbert and his writers.
George Conway was being too kind when he called the GQP a ‘dumpster fire’.
Its more like the nuclear waste we have to bury for 100,000 years before its safe
You sure he didn't say trumpster liar?
Porta-potty fire?
I believe that the technical term is protruded anus inferno.
I don't give a crap about anything that guy says. Have you seen his wife???? Why are all these sketchy people being allowed to voice their 'opinions' (if those ARE their opinions) on TV? That's what I want to know. I care more about what random hobos think than what George Conway thinks. Most of the people going on News shows these days are utterly detestable. That's why I stick with real news, like Meidas Touch. TV News is about as real as Reality TV.
Having no Speaker during a Republican majority in the House is a good way to minimize the damage they can do.
I hope the democrats go ham with campaign ads over this
But it also nukes the entire government and there's another government shutdown coming soon as it is. If the GOP can't fucking get it together in time, shit's going to get real bad.
Hopefully not the self inflicted types 😂
He'll still be in the history books as a leader of the STUPIDEST PEOPLE IN HISTORY. 🤦How are we supposed to teach Qanon to kids in the future?
Byron, as one of like only three black people in the GOP congressional delegation, is exactly what Malcolm X was referring to when saying, "today we still have house slaves and field slaves". Parade him out and have Byron tell those field slaves to, "shut up and get back to work. Before we sick the cops on you".
They pleaded guilty because they knew they wouldn't go to jail. Isn't a Criminal Conspiracy a felony? Yet they get slapped on the wrist with a time-out.
That invincible joke made me literally laugh out loud 🤣
The Donald has really been racking up the frequent liar miles! 😉
I remember when they were keeping track of the number when he was in office. It was over 33,000 as I recall.
Lovely turn of phrase there.
😂
@dianedenham5259 Yeah, he lost me at the 8 mile high club.
The Liar King of Mara lardass Club
Speaking of Racks ,did Melania say - When he puts on his bikini (she'll put on hers. There's a lot to unpack in her response.
Having a week without Stephen Colbert, hurts more than a week without a Speaker of the House 😅
Gosh yes, 5 months felt like 5 years.
And that is because Stephen Colbert (and team) work on hundreds of jokes per week.
Meanwhile, the whole work of McCarthy for nine months was just one joke.
Ditto that.
That's 'cause Colbert is much more useful and productive than the current House leadership.
Infinitely more!
You said it, brother.
So glad your back and safe Steven , your humor is like medicine that helps us deal with the stress of this Republican horror show!!!!
*you're (contraction of "YOU aRE")
your = possessive
*Stephen. Your
@@alvallac2171 He went to Hvert Lawd too maybe?
@@MisterWillow Herrverd, get it right! 🤣
Lol you live with you mom don't you!
Bet you're gonna pee your panties when Trump wins in 24
I love you, Stephen Colbert! Good to see you again! ❤
THANK YOU for mentioning what Jim Jordan did while at Ohio State. Would've been nice to have a little detail on it, but at least bringing it up is a big step. It's been so covered up, half the folks I talk to here in Ohio don't even know about it. Thank you for bringing national attention to it.
Whoa, that's a shame. I hope they find out before the next election.
Where are your local reporters…shouldn’t they have been all over that? Or are they all Sinclair owned..
That's all everyone has been talking about...What kind of a rock do you people live under? Republican suppression...That's a mighty big boulder...
"Running McDonald's qualifies you to be second-in-line for the presidency" - in fairness Stephen, the previous president's qualifications were being McDonald's mascot.
😆
The Hamburglar!
😂😂😂😂
@@brendashelonko2149😂😂😂😂
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😅😅🤡🎃💩
I was literally putting my hands up in front of the monitor at the end there, rofl... great payoff!
Stephen is such a treasure❤ I'm so glad he's back and well❤
"He's not so much a 'brother from another mother' as an 'elf from another shelf'."
DEAD
Loved it!
That Shaman guy spent more time in the Speaker's chair than Gymmie ever did.
Gymmie.... 🤣🤣🤣👏👏👏👏🤣👏🤣👏🤣👏👏🤣🤣👏👏🤣🤣🤣 Good one 🤣🤣🤣
And the Shaman did a better job at it too!
Ouch!
Stephen's writers have been *off the chart* brilliantly funny since the Writers' Strike ended. Bravo!!
Dude, you just slayed this! I almost choked on my meds. I think you’re trying to kill me 🤣
Imagine being the president of the United States of America, and telling your wife to demean herself in front of your guests for the sake of your own ego. That's the man you want making decisions, for sure.
Do you really think Melania would feel "demeaned"? She's used to selling herself
@@garfield2439
Ok, there is that
She did marry the Donald. I'm sure it was true love for her. (Love for his money. 🤣)
I just thought it was funny that Trump thought everybody else was missing out on it. I mean, Melania sure isn't sleeping with Trump, sooooo...
She demeans herself by allowing Trump to sleep with her. No biggie.
As per his diehard supporters, he is doing Gods work !! Apparently this is what christiantiy is to conservative Americans... wife in bikini carrying an assault rifle in one hand, hand in hand with husband who is grabbing a teenage beauty pagent contestant by "p***y" with the other hand. American dream??
Moderate Republicans, aka "Didn't think the leopards would eat their face, but had just enough sense to not slather themselves in barbecue sauce and poke the leopard with a stick."
Vote 1 Leopards Eating Faces Party
djt did say that they eat their young! He knows all about it!
"Moderate" Republicans: "Well obviously you don't slather yourself in bbq sauce that's just tempting fate! That being said I'm sure the leopards won't eat my face, we're on very good terms."
Colbert is by far the best of late night shows.
Dear Stephen,
You are hilarious!
Don't ever quit!
Gym Jordan gets a lot of hate on the Internet, but it isn't enough. We can do better. 😂
😂😂😂😂😂
I wanna know what happened to the documentary 😒
Gym jockstrap Jordan
It's great to have you back Stephen. It's also great to not have Gym Jordan as House Speaker.
I'm waiting for Trump to say: "Donald Trump? Never heard of him. I don't know who you're talking about. I never worked with him and barely knew him."
35 years of working in a fastfood restaurant and constantly having to deal with idiots might actually make him the least bad candidate
I doubt he was working in a restaurant. I assume he was the upper management guy that made the lives of the ACTUAL people working in the restaurants hell.
So there you are Mr Colbert. I'm glad to see you brought in your doctors note.
Don't let this get to be a habit.
We can't continue to go on in life without you.
So no pressure here.
Welcome back.
The more you get covid, the more likely you are to get long covid which is very much, 'all the bad'.
😂❤
So happy that you’re back and feeling better Stephen. Last week felt like an eternity without you.
Thank goodness for your wit and humor which helps me keep sane 😊
You don’t know what is like, baby you don’t know what is like…to see the traitors plead guilty.😂
Yes, gym was an assistant wrestling coach at Ohio state who ignored and refused to pass on complaints of sexual abuse. He was legally obligated to so. Yes, there was testimoy by several witnesses.
Stephen was on fire tonight -- great monologue!
Welcome back, Mr. Colbert, and for the love of god - stay healthy!
Yea how else you going get Covidiots to believe you about the boosters?
Words cannot express how much I missed this show. Love you Stephen and Crew!
Pretending that there is such a thing as a GOP moderate at this stage is deeply problematic.
While I agree with the point that the GOP as a *party* is in no way whatsoever "moderate" and that in itself is a real threat to the rights we enjoy as Americans, you should always remember that in any group of people, there will be some with differing viewpoints, ones who go with the group for their own reasons but do not agree *in totality* with what the group does (this is a reality of any group of people with a shared goal and individual perspectives)... and this is a fracture that you can take advantage of. If you treat your opponent as a monolith, you will miss opportunities to exploit them and turn them against each other. Splitting the GOP into two parties should be the main strategic goal of the political left.
It's all relative, really. Who's the rep from Orange County, CA nowadays? They're usually a moderate conservative because it's Cali.
@@JimRFF I don't think the original commenter had a problem with not treating the GOP as a monolith. But it is very important to recognise that _all_ the wings of the current GOP are right-wing extremists supporting horrible policies and people. Some Democrats are so desperate in their desire to find fellow moderates on the other side of the aisle that time and again, they delude themselves about some Republicans just because they happened to oppose the GOP majority on an issue or two. So they overlook small factoids like McCain promoting proto-Trump Sarah Palin or Liz Cheney having been an enthusiastic Trump supporter up until 2019.
@@joeystuart2949 Orange County is split between six congressional districts. Two of these sent GOP Reps: the 40th, sending Young Kim, and the 45th, sending Michelle Steel.
Steel came in already on the Trump train in 2020 and was a conservative extremist like most GOPers on Roe vs. Wade, lockdowns & masks, impeachment, LGBTQ rights, the Equality Act, and climate legislation.
Kim somewhat less bad but was big on anti-LGBTQ and anti-immigrant campaigning even before Trump.
It's not just that. In -the modern- today's GOP, the absolute _worst_ thing one Republican can call another Republican is "moderate." That's the kiss of death in -the modern- today's Republican Party.
(Sorry about the edits. Obviously, there is nothing modern about the GOP.)
Elf from another shelf was priceless. As well as the Invincible, God it's good to have Stephen back. VOTE BLUE 💙💙💙
Gotta love Dr Colbert. He’s got guts. It’s nice to see someone stick on their own values
Exactly " A house misguided"
Colbert sucks... remember when late night talk show was actually funny??? nobody cares about politics thats why their ratings are down the toilet.... when normal people turn on the TV and see these clowns crying about Trump it just makes his popularity go up lol
Doctor colbert? Has he attained another 'string to his bow' or is that a spell-fail? The 'D' and the 'M' are quite a way apart on the keypad....
But I do like the thought that MD Colbert could be a thing.
Love from here to there
@@samnelson2343he has an honorary Doctorate of Fine Arts. I forget from where.
@@eustacetuberson4375 He introduced himself in his medical segments as, "Doctor Stephen T. Colbert, DFA." It was great.
Listening to Stephen Colbert brightens my darkest day
"Please kill me!" Gotta love it!! Thanks for the giggles Steve!!
Finally you're back at the theater, Stephen!!! 🔥🔥🔥
The GOP is having such a tough time getting a speaker because nobody really wants to drive the GOP clown car...
Is it possible this could lead to the fracture of the GOP into two parties? Would be almost guaranteed if they were under an MMP or some other proportional representation system, but if they're already struggling to get anything done then desperation could set in, no?
Right….
😂
🎯
Oh, they were trying to steer in the first place? Hunh. I'd never have guessed, frankly.
Thank you, Stephen, I missed you a lot.
Giving one person so much spotlight, also gives him power
Stephen Colbert, so good to have you back! You and the writers out did yourselves tonight. Thank you!! 👏👏
*outdid
When used this way, out- is a prefix, not a standalone word.
I knew he could beat COVID! I knew it!
What makes me angry about this circus show is that only 5 of the "moderates" needed to vote for Jeffries for him to be Speaker and get the House back to governing.
There is no world in which Republicans put a Democrat speaker of the house in place, that's career suicide. Which raises the question, why did they expect democrats to save McCarthy?
But that would also mean that Jeffries would be Speaker of the House, which is a horrifying prospect.
It only needed 4 of the republican crazies to vote not to remove McCarthy
@@jenniferd37 Only horrifying for Republicans.
He would be an excellent S oft House👍🏽👏🏾❣️
Welcome back! Colbert and his writers are the best. Stay healthy 😊
Stephen Colbert needs to do his own SNL of the new Speaker of the House, Mike Johnson! There are indeed some resemblances!
Let's not forget a moderate in the Republican party today is David Duke without the baggage 😂😂😂😂
So David Duke before after he deboards Klan airlines BEFORE he reaches baggage claim
Indeed. I wish moderate Democrats would stop imagining moderates among Republicans and stop hoping for a "return to normalcy" or for "the fever to break" and West Wing bipartisanship to emerge with this GOP crew. They need to finally draw the proper conclusions from all the evidence over the last 20 years that all Republican elected officials are right-wing extremists. Not recognising that is a form of self-delusion that prevents effective counter-measures. Dems need to right the ship on their own, the same way they did back in FDR's time.
Hey now. The baggage wouldn't be a disqualifier. Besides, even if one of them were the leader of the KKK they still wouldn't be the worst Republican there.
Imagine being proud of saying that!
Maybe the GOP will elect a naked guy and call him the streaker of the House! 🤣
Good one
Boebert will do it....she's essentric...
😆
walterfristoe4643 for Streaker of the House!
Or Marjorie Taylor Greene and call it Shrieker of the house.
Welcome back, Stephen! Glad to hear that you are feeling better!
You were missed Stephen! Glad that you are feeling better.
Hardly such a thing as “GOP moderates”. You might be thinking of “less extreme among the GOP extremists”
Nailed it!
Maybe someone wanting to continue the Nixon policies might now be considered moderate . I mean Nixon never tried to steal an election by having people steal documents from inside the Democrat campaign ...
Liz Cheney?
@@lenawagenfuehr53 have you actually looked into Liz Cheney’s positions on matters that aren’t January 6?
“less extreme among the GOP extremists” that's like the difference between infinity and infinity - 10.
I'd rather say spineless lunatics among the lunatics.
Ok, "Elf from another Shelf" was laugh out loud funny!
Glad you're feeling better, Stephen. Positive vibes from New Hampshire, remember to be kind to each other and yourself during these trying times.
Stephen, I'm so glad you are feeling better!
Lawyers really need to give themselves harsher sentences. Anyone else making under $30k a year would spend six years in prison.
My first thought was "Must have been a pretty sweet plea deal".
In this case it's understandable as they want Donald. She is irrelevant but whether she turns on him is very relevant, more relevant than putting her into prison.
Same way a mobster would get a free out of jail card if he can turn his boss in.
Stephen is by far the best and funniest late night hosts. Always fun and intelligent.
Yes, he does have some very good writers
@@numlock2493Stephen is a genius writer himself. But in reply to your inference, his delivery is second to none.
And yes, as I posted several minutes ago, his writers are off the chart right now!
I try watching Seth Myers and Jimmy Kimmel sometimes.... But gawd.... They just aren't very funny. Stephen never fails to crack me up though. Even the bit about how clocks go backwards in Australia, that was HILARIOUS, and under-appreciated by the audience!
Yes….he is!
Thank you so much, Steve. The American people were tricked into demagoguery and shows like yours help show that.
"A House divided cannot stand."
It’s nice to see you feel better, Stephen Colbert. I’m glad you’re back.❤❤❤
She got her degree at Trump University.
I'm just so glad Stephen is better. And I hope Evie is well too.
I am so glad to see you back. Please stop getting COVID. You help keep us sane.
Jim Bag Jordan, as Michael Cohen calls him. Thank goodness there were enough GOP members who rejected him.
It's great to have Stephen back
Oh that Brie Larson joke was so gouda! 🧀
😁
Gouda you figure that?
It was a muenster.
Mmm... Brie.... *drools*
No, she got her degree from Trump University.
My son had a friend with the name Cheesebro. They called him cheeseburger. He acted like Eddie Haskel from Leave it to Beaver, so one day I called him Eddie Haskel, and all the boys busted out laughing. They said Joe's parents called him the same thing. Lol 😂 my how time flies. My boy is 41 now😮
The fact that the GOP won’t select a sensible person to lead their party, says a lot
I've noticed that Trump has what they call, "Front-Butt." This means his front-side looks like his back-side in those silly golf shorts!
If I was the, "Orange Camel Hump," I would sue the taylor that told him to wear those outside huh? L:O:L
No one sensible remains in the GOP
Or a sensible presidential candidate.
So glad to see you back! Worried about you. Please take care of yourself cuz we need you.
What WHINE pairs best with Cheese and Kracken?
"I think she might be smoken the kracken." LOL!
I can't help it, every time I hear the name Chesebro I lose it 🤦🏼♂🤦🏼♂
The GOP, folks. Ensuring that even after Trumples left office, other countries like the UK can still look at us and go, "What the hell is going on over there?"
Yep, we have been since Trump got elected. Our government is packed with pillocks but they ain’t got a patch on the GOP.
So you're saying the country that elected Boris Johnson and STILL hasn't finished Brexit, would ask...'what's going on over there?'
@@AC3handleyes.
Why is anyone still calling the Rapeublican party "GOP" like it's an old favorite grandfather?
@@AC3handle yes, that is how badly we Europeans think of the dumpster fire that is US politics.
3 weeks and no speaker from the broken GOP house. Can it get any sadder ?
Shhhhhh! It can. Don’t bring it on. Lol.
@@rbnallen95That's what I was going to say, lol.
Fifteen votes. Yes it can
Yes, it can. They can vote in one of trump's minions again. We would still be a no nothing House until 2025 when the GOP loses the power. VOTE BLUE in 2024
Oh yes it can
"Oh they mean JAIL JAIL" 😂
love Stephen Colbert.....thank you for your courage and brilliance. L. Martin
The “please kill me” call back could be seen coming a mile away, but was still worth it.
Stay strong Stephen!
That monologue killed 😂 "Elf from another shelf" definitely made my neighbors angry
When Trump said the election was "rigged and Stollen" he was referring to Stollen, a wonderful German Christmas bread. Its like a fruit cake but actually edible, Stollen, I highly recommend it. Trump's mind is known to wander to dessert in these dire times of his.
That “commitment” that GOP promised is looking pretty thin 😂
Out of all the things Trump could say about the election, I never once figured he’d accuse it of being German yeast bread. Truly a stable-genius insight if there ever was one.
Note: stollens may have fruit & nuts added
@@thaisdantan2293 Well, he sure had plenty of fruits and nuts on hand -- just look at his ace legal team!
@@expatannie6958 you’re correct about the nuts at least. Dunno about the fruits unless you count the one time Rudy dressed in drag. Pretty sure Trump was photographed with him at that event too. Pretty sure most actual gays know better than to defend someone like that anyway.
@@thaisdantan2293 I know, I just didn’t want to make my quip any longer than it had to be.
Welcome back, Stephen!
The "Please...kill me" part is really funny.😂😅😆
Trump:” I just bombed Iraq today.” 😂😂😂😂He can’t even order McDonalds on his own
Glad to see you’re well and back to your old funny self. I’m watching from Australia and I love your show and watch it regularly.