WOMAN GOES VIRAL ON TIKTOK BCAUSE HER DATE COULDN'T PICK HER UP OR PAY 4 HER UBER! MY HONEST OPINON

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  • čas přidán 13. 06. 2022
  • Hey boos!
    In today's video,
    I give commentary on a woman going viral for having transportation standards when dating.
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Komentáře • 363

  • @gabriellehanks6850
    @gabriellehanks6850 Před 2 lety +685

    She needs to stop dating for a while and get herself together so she can get access to better men… Ladies, men are always gonna find fault with you if think you deserve more than Burger King. Stop using the internet as a diary sistas.

  • @aspiring...
    @aspiring... Před 2 lety +479

    Paying for the date is one thing
    BUT ladies do not let the man know where you live. Drive yourself OR book your own uber.
    RESEACH the place you are going or choose the location yourself.
    We don't need more women to come up missing.

    • @hafsahm4486
      @hafsahm4486 Před 2 lety +38

      I let men drop me off home 💀💀💀💀 I need to stop being reckless lmao

    • @__Selena__
      @__Selena__ Před 2 lety +40

      Right, you can’t be too trusting in this crazy world. On the girls tik tok, she did say to not put your actual address in the ride share app or put in a landmark but you still can’t be too sure because they can still follow you or something. My trust in people is very low 🥴

    • @tataliciousdelicious9840
      @tataliciousdelicious9840 Před 2 lety +29

      Thank you! Men I casually date do not get my address. I will meet them at the location of the date. After the date I say my good byes in the parking lot. This also shows them that you’re not easy and they can’t try to follow you to your door trying to worm their way inside…

    • @aliascott7113
      @aliascott7113 Před 2 lety

      Absolutely agree

    • @itazuranakisu
      @itazuranakisu Před 2 lety +9

      Agreed. This invites the possibility of them stalking you especially if the date goes south. Personally I use a nickname also while it’s casual since my surname is less common.

  • @manifestgoddess
    @manifestgoddess Před 2 lety +257

    I agree with Yani on safety.
    As a woman that is not driving ,I got caught in a bad situation with a man who picked up me for at date. He took advantage of the situation and sexual assaulted me. I learned the hard way and advise women to be safe. Please go in a group or in the day time. I would advise you to take your own transportation just for your safety. It was a lesson learned and I'm not too quick to jump into anyone's car that I don't know.

    • @catcoffee7958
      @catcoffee7958 Před 2 lety +4

      🙏🙏🙏

    • @kae324
      @kae324 Před rokem +15

      it wasnt your fought i hope u pressed charges,and called the police, im so sorry that happened to u prayers and healing

    • @phalynwilliams4119
      @phalynwilliams4119 Před rokem +7

      I am so sorry about what happened to you. I hope that you are in counseling. Thank you for sharing your testimony with us.

    • @latashasmith1778
      @latashasmith1778 Před rokem +8

      I’m sorry to hear this, something similar happened to me. I hope you are healing 🙏🏾

    • @mimiwins1
      @mimiwins1 Před rokem +4

      I agree - safety first. I learned the hard way too ❤

  • @tashibalampkin8555
    @tashibalampkin8555 Před 2 lety +147

    The lesson to be learned in all this is stop your business on the internet unless you prepared for a potential drag. These internet streets are ruthless.

  • @swisschocolate95
    @swisschocolate95 Před 2 lety +134

    She may come across as entitled but I feel like she’s entitled to her entitlement.
    Let’s stop trying to decide for women what they should and should not expect from men who approach them. If said woman feels like her transportation should be covered when requesting her time and company that’s HER standard
    If he feels she’s unworthy of that he’s free to leave her alone.
    x

    • @mercedesUK85
      @mercedesUK85 Před 2 lety +7

      👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👌🏾

    • @kae324
      @kae324 Před rokem +7

      facts

    • @phalynwilliams4119
      @phalynwilliams4119 Před rokem +13

      Exactly! I don’t accept coffee dates but some of these men whine and get upset about it. Nowadays I prefer to meet my dates at an agreed upon locations. But safety is the most important part.

    • @AmberBrooklyn24
      @AmberBrooklyn24 Před rokem +6

      Right, it’s pretty simple 🤷🏾‍♀️

    • @Takobella
      @Takobella Před rokem

      Lmao nah, let’s call out entitled people. They deserve it

  • @koobea4859
    @koobea4859 Před 2 lety +64

    So true! I had a short girl coworker who always shamed me for being tall. Like “men like petite women” and “short women have so many more men to choose from.” I finally just told her that I don’t care what MEN think I just care about one MAN thinks! I also asked her to please STFU. I’m happily married now. People can be so shallow. We don’t have to lower ourselves to their level (pun intended).

    • @pinkqueenscookie
      @pinkqueenscookie Před rokem +5

      I am almost 5’7 and I’ve honestly never had a man call me too tall, even if they are only 5’7 too. Men who have a problem feel that way because they are insecure. Even short women love men 6’ and up… Also even women at 5’11 men love to say you’re a model lmao. Short also means your proportion are way more likely to be off (thus successful models are never average height.) Either way women of any height are desirable and preferences vary across men.

    • @Mary-rp2re
      @Mary-rp2re Před rokem +7

      @@pinkqueenscookie I’m 6FT and I’ve never had a man complain about me being too tall lol 😂 most of them just say we’re going to have NBA babies 😂

    • @Mary-rp2re
      @Mary-rp2re Před rokem +7

      You probably looked 10x better than her and she felt threatened lol

    • @PossibleBat
      @PossibleBat Před rokem +2

      Good for you for not falling to her level, people can be so nasty

  • @silverestsky
    @silverestsky Před 2 lety +52

    A man I once dated told me to stay out of the sun Bc I was getting too dark for his liking. Don’t listen to these men

  • @BMWF2023
    @BMWF2023 Před 2 lety +206

    I don't agree there was a problem with her wanting to be transported on a date. I'm older so in my day it was traditional for a man to pick you up but I'm very aware that today is a different time. But he could have zelled her the money for the uber since he wanted to go on the date. Bw need more standards and expectations not less and if he is not willing to pay for it and she didn't want to pay it's okay to say no. Stop trying to make it easier for them. Bad men are bad men whether you make them more comfortable or not and a "decent" guy doesn't expect for you to give him sex because he pays 50-100 dollars for a date.

    • @kadeemjoseph8138
      @kadeemjoseph8138 Před 2 lety +8

      The reason men are so reluctant to do things like that nowadays is that we see those "standards" women have be completely written off for the guys she finds attractive

    • @jessicab331
      @jessicab331 Před 2 lety +14

      Yeeea Ion NEVER let a man drive me I have to really be rocking with you! A first date I’m absolutely driving. What if it goes wrong??? Then you jus s.o.l?!?! Aht aht.

    • @somebodycomelistentothispo7217
      @somebodycomelistentothispo7217 Před 2 lety +1

      @Take it to your house EXACTLY. “No” is a complete sentence

    • @nauticabc
      @nauticabc Před 2 lety +2

      I agree because this was their second date and not their first date so she had the same expectations from the previous date

    • @LaraiKwasau
      @LaraiKwasau Před 2 lety +5

      The reality is this is an entitled mindset. Get your own transportation so, if this man is creepy you can exit on your own terms. Also, take your back up money for the date so if he acts crazy you can pay for your meal and ghost. It is a way of you still having some sort of control of the date. Her standard is literally governed by what she feels her friends are getting. That is a recipe for disaster.

  • @bhalette4153
    @bhalette4153 Před 2 lety +82

    Did you see the news update on the Felicia Johnson case, the woman who came to Houston, in hopes of dancing here? She took an uber from her hotel to the suspect's home, sn uber he paid for. Cops searched his phone with photos of 3 deceased bodies in it. Felicia's blood was found in his home. Smh, praying for her family. RIP.
    Please be careful out here ladies, we are the least protected.

    • @Floratic
      @Floratic Před 2 lety +7

      Wow! Thanks for the update. Gonna check it out.

    • @Floratic
      @Floratic Před 2 lety

      @@sg5720 I believe she was doing s*x work on the side because he was suppose to pay her $500 for the night.

  • @deasyastarr
    @deasyastarr Před 2 lety +76

    “I’m no man’s fantasy
    I never plan to be
    Didn’t come with a set of instructions
    So you don’t know how to handle me”
    - Fantasy by Kari Faux

  • @bhalette4153
    @bhalette4153 Před 2 lety +67

    I agree. This woman is putting herself at risk and doesn't realize it. Before I married my husband, I never allowed men inside my home. I would meet men for dates until time proved they had good intentions.

  • @mayowamo4126
    @mayowamo4126 Před 2 lety +123

    People will come for her looks and act like she's not worthy to ask for such but she's right. She's gonna be inconveniencing herself to go on a date that he asked her on. The least he could do is cashapp her some money for an Uber.
    That being said, she could've at least put some chapstick on before getting on TikTok 😩

    • @sassyplantlady9002
      @sassyplantlady9002 Před 2 lety +20

      I completely agree! People are purposely missing the message and the meat of what she saying. It’s simple, she is inconveniencing herself to meet with you therefore the man should automatically offer the money to her to get to him. Also, I couldn’t quite figure out what look she was giving and sadly she’s looking a bit ashy and not put together. Doesn’t negate that what she’s saying is facts though!

    • @eon001
      @eon001 Před 2 lety +27

      @@sassyplantlady9002 If dating a man is seen as an inconvenience, maybe she shouldn't be dating him. If I was considered and inconvenience, I wouldn't want to waste my money or time on you. It's not just about men guarding the wallet. They are guarding their time and there own heart. It's not just a gold digger test. We want to know if you have genuine interest and not just free food.

    • @kamigriff
      @kamigriff Před 2 lety +12

      @@eon001 this is a broke man’s comment.

    • @eon001
      @eon001 Před 2 lety +9

      @@kamigriff Nope. I'm an average earner, and I'm not ashamed of it.

    • @ashaduplessis2772
      @ashaduplessis2772 Před 2 lety +4

      @@sassyplantlady9002 if it's an inconvenience then why is she accepting my now what if a man said he was inconveniencing himself by paying for the day so you should at least sleep with him would you feel the same way. She accepted the date when she could have declined bottom line is nobody should have expectations while "Dating" a relationship is one thing

  • @roshikay413
    @roshikay413 Před 2 lety +108

    I’m a BW that’s open option dating chick & I will tell you. Men from different ethnicities & the way they are raise to treat a woman on a date is profound. I never had to cover a date & they didn’t even allow me to tip. Although, this lady was a bit entitled, BM has a problem with BW being entitled, but they can. Men will try to humble pretty women after they get them as their girl & trap them like what happened to Brittany Renner.

  • @hafsahm4486
    @hafsahm4486 Před 2 lety +69

    I just went to her tiktok and apparently he did end up paying for the Uber….now I’m confused what the point in the original tiktok was 💀

    • @amorelockster1023
      @amorelockster1023 Před 2 lety +26

      Maybe she was just trying to go viral honestly if I was him I wouldn’t go out with her again only the second date and she telling her and his business on social media

    • @somebodycomelistentothispo7217
      @somebodycomelistentothispo7217 Před 2 lety

      @Amore Lockster she didn’t show his name of pic so how is this?

    • @somebodycomelistentothispo7217
    • @hafsahm4486
      @hafsahm4486 Před 2 lety +11

      @@amorelockster1023 deffo just tryna go viral, yuppp if I were him that would turn me off completely

    • @chinny012
      @chinny012 Před 2 lety

      What’s her tiktok

  • @lemonlemon7186
    @lemonlemon7186 Před 2 lety +43

    I’m not even having the conversation about how I am getting to the date. Where are WE meeting, what time, see you there. He definitely won’t be picking me up or bringing me home until I know who he is and where he fits in my life. Some women are too eager to prove they have standards and they’re just showing how easy it would be for men to take advantage of them.

  • @kittyncocoalways1
    @kittyncocoalways1 Před 2 lety +14

    Don't get with a guy that doesn't love you as much as you love yourself

  • @kniceewiththespice7812
    @kniceewiththespice7812 Před 2 lety +56

    Relating a mans mindset about money to a woman’s mindset about $ex actually gives reason to her point. If he picked her up for the first date I can see why she was perplexed when he didn’t pick her up for the second or provide transportation just like a woman who puts out on the first night and acts offended when propositioned the second.. if he has standards as it pertains to not providing her transportation he should’ve kept that energy on the first date 💁🏽‍♀️ all in all we do live in 2022 and I agree that it is too dangerous to go anywhere with some of these men because they are predators. I also believe that any situation you enter romantic or other wise should be balanced 😌

  • @pl3312
    @pl3312 Před 2 lety +118

    I agree with a lot of Yanie’s points. However, I feel like we should stay on code and stop trying to get other BW to be “reasonable” and “balanced” when it’s never reciprocated. I personally don’t have those exact standards, but that’s irrelevant. To be honest, men don’t really be considering all the talking points Yanie has highlighted, and that’s where we go wrong. Trying to get a man to like you and see the real you won’t make him value you any higher. Ultimately I agree with if someone doesn’t meet your standards someone else will.

    • @carmenitac
      @carmenitac Před 2 lety +5

      So do you think the points she highlighted are correct tho? I feel like they are, but men do not consider those things like women do. So seems like things get lost in translation during date

    • @RealTalkWithYanie
      @RealTalkWithYanie  Před 2 lety +24

      I always say be difficult within good reason if you feel like this is difficult within good reason do you! Anything you do should always come with boundaries it’s not about getting somebody to like you and not having any boundaries with yourself or the person that you’re dealing with. You’re not auditioning you’re being yourself.

    • @pl3312
      @pl3312 Před 2 lety

      @@carmenitac exactly

    • @xshesyourqorqeousxx3
      @xshesyourqorqeousxx3 Před 2 lety +7

      Some men do reciprocate, the ones that largely don’t are BM

    • @Nirobiscloset10
      @Nirobiscloset10 Před 2 lety

      Exactly 😊

  • @TheOriginalScorpioBelle
    @TheOriginalScorpioBelle Před 2 lety +12

    A man is not getting my address until I know him very well. I mean very well. Family, friends, job, background check. She’s tripping hard with her safety.

  • @SleepingHarmony
    @SleepingHarmony Před 2 lety +181

    What I would say is if she is bold enough to get on the internet and say what she deserve, she should have been smart enough to at least fix her self up .Put some chap stick on , fix your hair, put a cute out fit on IJS 🤷🏽‍♀️ not trying to be mean.

    • @__Selena__
      @__Selena__ Před 2 lety +72

      As crazy as this sounds, I really think she purposely presented herself that way for shock value. Like she wanted the clicks and it worked 🥴

    • @reinelena9915
      @reinelena9915 Před 2 lety +9

      Exactly!

    • @SleepingHarmony
      @SleepingHarmony Před 2 lety

      @@__Selena__ you know what the sounds logical she seems like a troll .

    • @fjgri8467
      @fjgri8467 Před 2 lety +15

      @@__Selena__ I don't think so..she could have gotten the same attention if she fixed herself up.

    • @eon001
      @eon001 Před 2 lety +22

      I am Ebony Lotus 🌸
      Exactly. I actually date plus size women. Her size isn't the issue. She simply looks clapped.

  • @LittleMissDeeDee
    @LittleMissDeeDee Před 2 lety +209

    I saw the original TikTok some months ago. I think she’s low-key trying to compete with her sister because she bagged a provider man.
    I disagree with women who say she’s not entitled. She is. A man isn’t obligated to pay for your Uber. It’s a kind gesture that I understand most women would accept, but to write off a man as “poor quality” for that alone is ridiculous IMO especially if he is paying for the actual dates.

    • @librarianrose4472
      @librarianrose4472 Před 2 lety +13

      Why would be competition? I see it as inspiration

    • @LittleMissDeeDee
      @LittleMissDeeDee Před 2 lety +26

      @@librarianrose4472 I’m judging by her tone and demeanour. “She has it all so why can’t I?” Doesn’t come across as feeling inspired to me.
      She feels she is deserving of a provider man for simply existing. That’s entitlement at its finest and I definitely believe she thinks her relation to her sister means she should have the same dating prospects, which is possible but not with her attitude.

    • @LittleMissDeeDee
      @LittleMissDeeDee Před 2 lety +22

      @K C he is spending money on her by paying for the dates. She is not entitled to an Uber. It’s a privilege not an entitlement.

    • @mercsaint4846
      @mercsaint4846 Před 2 lety +41

      Must be a cultural thing then because where I’m from if a man asks you out he MUST pay transportation whether that’s to give you the money, pick you up or pay for the Uber himself

    • @Price8903
      @Price8903 Před 2 lety +20

      I don’t see her as competing with her sister. I think she used it as an example as to say there’s men out there who will oblige her request.

  • @2023NoThanks
    @2023NoThanks Před 2 lety +59

    You did a great job tonight. I'm glad you decided to stay on a little longer and invite people on. It created a better and understanding from all perspective.

  • @QueenChroniclesOfficial
    @QueenChroniclesOfficial Před 2 lety +138

    He definitely should compensate for her transportation if he asked her out on the date but couldn’t make a way for her to get there and if that is her standard. So she could have asked him to send her the money so she could book a ride for herself. Also, this was a second date, and he presented himself as a provider off tops, so I understand the expectation, but the safety factor she definitely messed up on.

    • @eon001
      @eon001 Před 2 lety +16

      Dating is slowly turning into low key escorting🙄. I've always paid for date's, but I've never paid for transport. If you don't want to finance your own travel, you don't want to date me. Simple as that.

    • @QueenChroniclesOfficial
      @QueenChroniclesOfficial Před 2 lety +11

      @@eon001 well then both of them should have been more clear from the beginning or just moved on. I disagree that it compares to escorting, but definitely agree that she should have just chosen not to date him at all instead of complaining on the internet.

    • @lyngrey4186
      @lyngrey4186 Před 2 lety +7

      He definitely needs to pay or provide the transportation

    • @ShandraGraham
      @ShandraGraham Před 2 lety +13

      @@eon001 it’s amazing our parents/grandparents were able to manage dating without it being an escort service… and last I checked an “escort” means sex is in the equation of the transaction. Most women are not putting that on the dating menu, the MEN ARE. Men have warped normal dating into “getting sex” from a date… women (most women) never said y’all was getting sex from dinner at Applebee’s. And now dudes saying they not doing nothing without getting sex… that’s what turned it into an escort service.

    • @eon001
      @eon001 Před 2 lety +8

      @@ShandraGraham Our grandparents didn't demand Uber money on dates. Especially when the man is already paying for the date. And for what it'st worth you technically don't have to give up s3x as an escort.

  • @demitriwelling1348
    @demitriwelling1348 Před 2 lety +9

    He is not a provider; run ladies. A man should handle the expenses for dates especially those in the beginning.

  • @PettyLabelle
    @PettyLabelle Před 2 lety +55

    Let women have their standards ….. had this girl looked like a Lori Harvey YALL would be cheering sis on .
    Let me tell you something since I start coming at men pockets first ……the dating experience has been so much more fun .
    Ladies just find what works for you because what I have learned the right one will do it and oh for her ride .

    • @amorelockster1023
      @amorelockster1023 Před 2 lety +8

      Someone like Lori wouldn’t have to deal with this I’m not letting any man I go on a date with the second time take me home or get me a Uber these men are crazy asf too many women especially black women have been getting killed by these unstable ass men

    • @AuroraCreator555
      @AuroraCreator555 Před 2 lety +4

      I don’t like the “Lizzo Size Struggling Model” part

  • @jamilajohnson7460
    @jamilajohnson7460 Před rokem +3

    I definitely get Yanie on the while safety thing but girl who gets invited to a date and pay for it?! As black women if you cannot even get a drive what is in the relationship for us. The last time I tried paying for a meal my date looked at me in horror and asked me what kind of man have I been dating? I felt shamed, then and there I had to re-evaluated my life. That same man told me if a man wants you no amount of money matters to him. Black women level up or just leave some of these men alone.

  • @firstnamelastname4427
    @firstnamelastname4427 Před 2 lety +24

    If it were Ashley Graham or Tess Holiday, would we still be having the same conversation about "entitlement" and "unrealistic expectations?" 🤔

    • @milosidloyi6798
      @milosidloyi6798 Před 2 lety +13

      No we literally wouldn’t and the narrative would be completely different 😕

    • @Alyssaj1236
      @Alyssaj1236 Před 2 lety +6

      damn good point

  • @TheplushLife2023
    @TheplushLife2023 Před 2 lety +29

    You said everything I have been thinking since this whole hypergamy/having standards/ alpha male/ KS talk has been trending on social media. It’s like what’s understood doesn’t need to be explained as well there is a level of emotional intelligence needed to date and get what you expect out of dating or a relationship.

  • @mercedesUK85
    @mercedesUK85 Před 2 lety +13

    I 💯 agree with her but as others say wouldn’t have put it out there. She is not desperate just has high standards. Your man can be a serial killer and you are with him a whole year.

  • @danak1600
    @danak1600 Před 2 lety +32

    Yanj you did nothing but preach and I’m only 25 minutes in. Wise woman.

  • @skyw.8767
    @skyw.8767 Před rokem +3

    Omg I got picked on for wearing sketchers as well. Crazy thing about it, I was just thinking about it the other day. But what I thought was, it’s crazy that they picked on me for wearing sketchers yet I lived in the suburbs and the girls that picked on me lived in impoverished areas. This really highlighted what’s wrong with our community.

    • @Yahya_352
      @Yahya_352 Před 9 měsíci +1

      Late reply: but sis sketchers are such comfortable shoes with some timeless designs not all but there are definitely some nice ones.. that’s why you got to do what you enjoy, some people are simply miserable

    • @skinni_the_P00hBear
      @skinni_the_P00hBear Před měsícem

      I used to wear sketchers when I was a kid. Hella comfortable, affordable, and lasted years. Kids LOVES targeting people for their shoes and phones when I was in school. Like I'm sorry but I'm not paying 200 dollars for some expensive shoes I'll either grow out of or they fall part in 8 months

  • @truthteller816
    @truthteller816 Před 2 lety +9

    “Why do you want to get attention from somebody that doesn’t want to see you beyond your appearance?” This is a WORD ‼️ You preaching here Yanie, I say this all the time; being seen as conventionally attractive has its benefits, but it also has a lot of draw backs too, and I don’t think that anyone should rely on their looks alone to get through life.

  • @ms.miwitdatbul520
    @ms.miwitdatbul520 Před 2 lety +11

    Please lets not forget this women is on this video au natural. Unconventional beauty? Why because she not a size two? She is a model and when she has her makeup done she looks really good.

    • @RealTalkWithYanie
      @RealTalkWithYanie  Před 2 lety +12

      Being conventionally attractive means the person's look is along the lines of the society's ideals of good looks. It is a cultural look and varies as people from different places have different aesthetic norms. You tell me if society is accepting of plus size women or women who are bigger in general because I’m a tall woman?

    • @GDL364
      @GDL364 Před 2 lety

      Still unconventional…. Conventional beauty is slim. Plus if you’re a model you should look good without makeup.

  • @ennvee1989
    @ennvee1989 Před 2 lety +6

    I dont understand why people wanna date other people who don't correspond to their standards?? Like why waste your time with a dude who doesnt want to provide transportation if thats what you require from men in the dating stages? And men, if you want a woman who will split 50/50 on bills with you, don't chase after women who DONT want to do that. Sheesh.

  • @joltjolt5060
    @joltjolt5060 Před 2 lety +4

    Gone are the days when you can let anyone know where you live. Meet at the restaurant, and leave alone. Always. Safety first.

  • @amaragrace94
    @amaragrace94 Před rokem +2

    First sign of intentional disrespect block/unmatch IMMEDIATELY. I don't care how you look! Get that self esteem up in therapy, eat healthier, and hit the gym or just go outside and move FOR YOUR OWN HEALTH. Be healthy and fall in love with who you see in the mirror. Laugh in his face for playing with the wrong one. Next!

  • @alexist7772
    @alexist7772 Před 2 lety +11

    I don’t agree with the girl in the video because 1. It’s okay to have standards but if you have to impose those standards upon someone else, cut your losses. 2. Never allow someone you barely know to know where you stay. Let time go by and get to know them before you let someone know where you lay your head. 3. What worked out for your sister won’t always be your story. Like yanie said, for all you know she’s not telling the whole truth and she may be paying for something every now and then. Or yeah he’s paying for everything but it may come with consequences you’re not necessarily willing to do. And 4. You’re not entitled to folks’ money, just like men aren’t entitled to sex/our body. I don’t think transportation is part of the date because it HAS to happen for your both to get to the destination, otherwise, there is no date. But yes, never pay for any part of the date unless YOU want to. Putting it on the internet was the cherry on top because if you lay all your standards out there, tread lightly because people are intentionally deceptive. But overall, there’s nothing wrong with having standards but make sure the person you’re dating can meet those standards without you having to prompt them

  • @theegoddessk
    @theegoddessk Před 2 lety +4

    I am dating two men and both of them have offered to help. They both stated that when I am comfortable they will step in and help. My washer needs a sensor replaced and I have to go to the laundrymat. I pushed back a date time do to the laundry because the laundrymat being busy and full. One offered to look at my washer to help replace the part when I am comfortable for him to come over. The other offered to take me out when I feel stressed out from work and help fix a closet door that has been broke when I am comfortable for him to come over. Both have expressed they can be providers and are willing to help lighen the load so I can be the best partner to them. I am willing to go dates with them because they stated I am good company and we have not slept together.

    • @peacelove7437
      @peacelove7437 Před 2 lety +2

      Ummm. Words dont mean anything. Be careful.

    • @theegoddessk
      @theegoddessk Před 2 lety +1

      @@peacelove7437 thank you for the concern. I am that's why they never seen where I live. They will wait until I am ready.

  • @ThomasandNia
    @ThomasandNia Před 2 lety +8

    Luckily, I'm not in these dating streets no more, my wedding in 4 months, but some things I lived by while dating as an adult in ratchet ass FL😂😂: DO NOT ride or accept an Uber/Lyft from a guy dates 1-5 period (if something happen to your car call a friend or Uber your damn self these ppl out here crazy and they extra crazy in FL), have protection with you, make sure you have enough cash on you to cover your portion of the date, even if you expect him to pay (note for this, if the date does not go well or if he bring up any type of sexual convo date 1-5 offer to pay or just pay for yourself PLEASE), do not give your attention exclusively to one guy unless HE ASKS YOU for a commitment(bf/gf).

  • @mahoganyp9183
    @mahoganyp9183 Před 2 lety +6

    About the dating apps, I agree 100%. I’ve never been on a dating site and never will. It’s just something unnatural about it for me.

  • @sammyz4eva
    @sammyz4eva Před 2 lety +7

    The part where you talked about how you were picked on at school made me so emotional 😢 so happy you are doing better now as you deserve to be. Deffo agree with your advice in this video 👏🏽, we need to stop caring what men think it doesn’t serve us. I know my worth and will not accept what’s beneath me.

  • @trinityzurielle4186
    @trinityzurielle4186 Před 2 lety +32

    Why is worried about dating when she doesn’t even have a car? Seems like her priorities are messed up

    • @kjsfhjk
      @kjsfhjk Před 2 lety +2

      TALK TO EM

    • @NDavis2186
      @NDavis2186 Před 2 lety +29

      Depending on where you live having a vehicle simply isn't a necessity or priority. One of my closest friend doesn't even have her license, she has a career, is happily married and a mother of 4. Secondly, symbols of independence shouldn't correlate with one being worthy of having companionship. There's a slew of people who have their "shit/priorities together" and still can't get this dating/Love thing right.

    • @trinityzurielle4186
      @trinityzurielle4186 Před 2 lety +9

      @@NDavis2186 my point is, if she’s going to ask for something, it’s ideal that you should be capable of providing yourself the same thing. In this case, if her standard is someone owning or providing transportation then she doesn’t even reach her own standard.

    • @Pickmewhowasntpicked
      @Pickmewhowasntpicked Před 2 lety +13

      @@trinityzurielle4186
      Oh girl no. Raise your standards and ask for more. Hypergamy is a real thing.

    • @trinityzurielle4186
      @trinityzurielle4186 Před 2 lety +12

      @@Pickmewhowasntpicked See the thing is, when you’re a woman who stands true to your morals and your own standards, you don’t have to try for hypergamy. You naturally attract things of favor and value, because that’s the energy you put out.
      That being said, you don’t have to teach me about hypergamy. I’m currently engaged to a successful, conventionally “high value” man and it’s because our values and standards aligned. Everything we ask for we can both do for ourselves in every aspect..but I still get the princess treatment 🥰

  • @ShandraGraham
    @ShandraGraham Před 2 lety +30

    Yeah she was doing the most...it aint got nothing to do wit the way she looks. People of any type of look can DO THE MOST.

  • @jessicascreenwritingservices

    This is why I LOVE your channel Yanie. The real talk + common sense and transparency! ☕️💕✨ side note: I felt that when you talked about your experiences being bullied in middle school. Those years were brutal for me too.

  • @Jana0526
    @Jana0526 Před 2 lety +6

    The truth is that people tell too much of they business online because they want people to validate what they are currently feeling. They forget this is the internet not therapy or your personal diary. When you post something it is now open for debate and a free for all. The internet is forever and the human mind set is forever evolving. How you feel now may change over time which why you should keep your opinions to yourself because someone is always waiting with Receipts of your post history.

  • @VintageAfro91
    @VintageAfro91 Před 2 lety +4

    I LOVE your honesty and transparency, Yanie. I can totally relate to the bullying, especially in my middle school years. It was brutal.

  • @chanelgodd
    @chanelgodd Před 2 lety +5

    This woman LOVES putting her relationship business online, this is NOT her first time going viral for this sort of thing. I honestly think she enjoys the attention of getting to create discourse around her failures more than she enjoys dating🙄

  • @naimahbryant
    @naimahbryant Před 2 lety +12

    Idk why but I find his title, "Lizzo Size Model" to be so unnecessary... I get describing her, and maybe I'm wrong and it is necessary here, but something about that just... doesn't sit right.. she's a model, do we really need to put Lizzo size? smh

  • @tameashajanaye3200
    @tameashajanaye3200 Před rokem +2

    Man ima have to go ahead and pay for your patreon cause you stay putting me on game I’m currently not dating iam SPENT honey I do plan to get therapy and just focus on being the best version of myself and being a great mom

  • @angelinanotjolie109
    @angelinanotjolie109 Před 2 lety +7

    Its called Real Talk With Yanie and some people watching couldn't handle it lmao. I personally love this advice and it was another example of you keeping it all the way real, you always do, but this hit for me even more because it was similar advice I've gotten from family when it came to transportation on dates and how it can get dangerous. It really showed you are looking out for your viewers by saying that instead of instantly taking the women's side. And you still did it in a respectful way. Truly my fav content creator, much luv!💕

    • @Noise_floorxx
      @Noise_floorxx Před rokem

      FOH. having a different opinion does not mean that people can’t handle Yanies opinion. Please grow up.

    • @angelinanotjolie109
      @angelinanotjolie109 Před rokem

      @@Noise_floorxx it's literally a nod to Yanie's intro but okay lmao I'm grown enough thx

  • @eden89thomas89
    @eden89thomas89 Před 2 lety +4

    Yanie you looked so good in this video,your face looks slimmer and your collarbones are more pronounced. That hardwork paying of girl!!!

  • @a.b.2405
    @a.b.2405 Před 2 lety +4

    I love the yellow eyeshadow look.

  • @YeahIGotNuthin
    @YeahIGotNuthin Před 2 lety +10

    I just feel like these men love to continuously move the goal post. And on top of that they continuously make black women the donkey.
    I come from the working class, call it low standards, but I honestly only dated men in my same financial bracket. I’ve always had an equality mindset because that’s what I grew up seeing. Both my parents worked, both cooked, and WE ALL cleaned the house as a family! We spent time together and bonded.
    So to me, I saw that ☝🏾☝🏾☝🏾☝🏾as the ideal family/ partner dynamic. But I don’t feel like the men I’ve dated wanted the same things out of life. So seeing these men complaining about this fake narrative that isn’t reflective of the average black women at all (where we all out here just using men). 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄It’s annoying AF!

  • @LiLBoSsYBuNnY
    @LiLBoSsYBuNnY Před 2 lety +1

    Dropping gems Yanie, thank you!

  • @rqhstlouis
    @rqhstlouis Před 2 lety +16

    You may have one already. But can you do a video of things guys notice or consider red flags on the first date or in the courting phase?

  • @valenciaorange2000
    @valenciaorange2000 Před 2 lety +6

    I would just say screw all this dating stuff. Too much to look out for and just tired of the mental exhaustion. I'm good!!!

  • @Livie_xe
    @Livie_xe Před 2 lety

    I love when you talk to people and have different perspectives even though I agree with most of want Yanie says I love panel time. I hope you get a show in the future. will be supporting can't wait to see you grow

  • @arbiecowley88
    @arbiecowley88 Před 2 lety +2

    Love this video . Opened my eyes to a lot

  • @jifeak
    @jifeak Před 2 lety +10

    Sorry, might be the only one with the odd opinion, but after agreeing to meet guys on dates and them not showing up, I reverted back to my "old school standard" of being picked up for dates. This standard has served me well so far. If they don't show, then they don't show. I don't waste an Uber to go and eat dinner alone. I give a neighboring apartment block address. My exact address is never given.

  • @giftofgab4012
    @giftofgab4012 Před 2 lety +5

    I get the safety issues but he knew she didn't have a car and invited her on a date so he should have atleast offered to pay for her uber, and this was there 2nd date. I would have not went on a 2nd date with him if he didn't atleast offer.

  • @charmaineespeut4627
    @charmaineespeut4627 Před 2 lety +1

    Yanie always come through with the looks! You look good girl!

  • @amaniiexxchnge
    @amaniiexxchnge Před 2 lety +2

    This video was so good

  • @SweetUareDesi
    @SweetUareDesi Před 2 lety +4

    I get sent Uber blacks for dates- TF
    Why does a man want you to be stressed in heels
    Ladies raise your standards and disqualify ppl who don’t care about your comfort and safety 🍑

  • @ros35677
    @ros35677 Před rokem +1

    Thank you for sharing your bullying story . ❤️

  • @choconethotcoco4717
    @choconethotcoco4717 Před 2 lety +7

    The problem is she really should've talk to the guy for a few weeks before they went on a date to get to know the type of man he is so that she can make a sound decision about whether she wants to go on a date with him. Too many people want to just go on a date with a guy they met the day before, NO! Have a few conversations with the guy first to get to know him. Had she done that oh she would've discovered what kind of man she was dealing with and never went on a date with him in the first place.

    • @quelquun2018
      @quelquun2018 Před 2 lety +2

      They’ll looking for a free meal 🤣🤣🤣

    • @hazeleyes7225
      @hazeleyes7225 Před rokem

      @@quelquun2018 a meal is not that serious. If your concern is she wants a free meal u should not be dating and stay out that lady space

  • @AquariusNation777
    @AquariusNation777 Před rokem +4

    Nothing wrong with having standards. Since it's the second date he should've gotten her an Uber or taxi or something

  • @MahoganyBthe_1
    @MahoganyBthe_1 Před rokem

    This content fed my soul! 😊💕💕

  • @Irene10123
    @Irene10123 Před rokem +1

    Are we asking this woman to change her dating standard? Isn't it better to know expectations upfront? He didn't measure up and has to go. I'm not mad at it. I respect it. I don't think we should tell people they should reconsider their boundaries because we don't think they are worthy of the standards they set for themselves... The ladies who think they're of a "higher value" but has set a lower dating standard are going in a frenzy right now. LMAO!! love it.

  • @coppercoloredlibra
    @coppercoloredlibra Před 2 lety +1

    This episode is just how I feel about everything you said it’s out of hand like what has happened to the world.

  • @queensittingduck
    @queensittingduck Před rokem +1

    I think he didn't like her as much after their first date. That's why he didn't want to pick her up again.

  • @Pocahontas0017
    @Pocahontas0017 Před 2 lety +9

    @yanie What happened to your live yesterday? I watch part of it then tended to the kids. I came back to finish during my downtime and was so saddened. The topics you speak on are top tier.

    • @deasyastarr
      @deasyastarr Před 2 lety +4

      It’s on her patreon, I missed it too lol 🥲

    • @RealTalkWithYanie
      @RealTalkWithYanie  Před 2 lety +1

      It's on my patreon babes ❤️

    • @Pocahontas0017
      @Pocahontas0017 Před 2 lety +1

      @@RealTalkWithYanie okay, I will be new to that platform…Excited to follow your content there.

  • @kreativesolutions7.0
    @kreativesolutions7.0 Před 2 lety

    Great Live. Keep it up for all women please.

  • @Vivi.Machine
    @Vivi.Machine Před 2 lety +2

    The mindset of the "he asked me out so he should pay for everything" is so strange to me, especially in this conversation about the Uber. It makes it seem like the man, because he was interested in the woman, owes her for her time and can only compensate her for that monetarily.
    As if women don't have agency enough to decide who or why they want to date. As if men and women don't equally agree to be on dates or cannot show equal or approximate interest. So many women seem to have this attitude that they should be earned, like men are only there to be interviewed on dates. But shouldn't that go both ways? Don't we feel each other out and/or try to impress each other on a date? Shouldn't we both make good effort if we are both interested?
    I think this is because so many women accept dates with men they don't have even a baseline of interest in -which is unfair on the men- they view themselves as something to be pursued and earned. Doesn't that make you a trophy then? Isn't that the same as taking away your agency and devaluing you as an object to be won? A good date should be less like a chase to win somw trophy and more like a tango, where both people actively contribute, in different ways but with equal agency.
    Going out with someone you can't even say you're genuinely interested in (and NOT because THEY'RE interested in YOU) is disrespectful to yourself and whoever you date- you mislead your date and make the date impersonal and transactional. It seems to me, and to many people I saw in the live chat, that the woman in the video wasn't genuinely interested in the man. She spoke nothing of his character after their one date and only described him as this wealthy lawyer, with a disdainful attitude. Calling her entitled I don't think is far off, her priorities seem to be based mostly on money...

  • @Cpre1111
    @Cpre1111 Před 2 lety +7

    If it was truly about men dealing with too many entitled women, I can understand that. More so, it sounds like whining about women (who they think are lesser & should be easier notches) holding to their standards & getting their money. Chile. Most of them have nothing to offer women but money, b/c they don't want to be faithful, respectful, act with integrity or MARRY. They've contributed to women developing the mindset to milk them for all the $$ they got, b/c that $$ is the only reliable resource of any meaning they can consistently provide women. It's sad. Yes, many women out here have become entitled, vicious gold diggers who don't desire men for the right reasons. A lot of good women have been burned and have become 'savage' out here. Yet these men repeatedly overlook "boring" or "educated" women that aren't out in the clubs, streets or wherever they meet these women. Then have the audacity to wonder why they keep getting with these types of women 🙄. Make it make sense. Choose better. Be better. Slow down & take the time to get to know her. That's the way to avoid getting played.

  • @aracystic28
    @aracystic28 Před rokem

    Yanie I’m just watching all your videos while I’m at work and looking at you just makes me smile. You’re so damn gorgeous. Oh my goodness.

  • @shauns4244
    @shauns4244 Před 2 lety

    Yanie you really speaking nothing but facts!!!

  • @idahouston9143
    @idahouston9143 Před 2 lety +4

    I think if I heard her correctly this was the second date. I may be wrong but honestly I wouldn't want a man to know where I live on my second or third date. I know that might sound uptight for some people but real predators don't look like predators and they want you to be as comfortable as possible. A date on average between 2 to 4 hours. So at minimum you'd either known this person 6 hours after 3 days and at maximum you've known them 12 hours. Sex trafficking, rape, assault of any form, robbery are all real things. They don't really need to know where you live or serious details about you until you really know something about them personally and can verify their character.

  • @musicmakeuplover3025
    @musicmakeuplover3025 Před rokem

    Wow good content 👏🏽

  • @GeminiCloudTech
    @GeminiCloudTech Před 2 lety +2

    My father taught me a woman should always have enough money to call for a cab, when I didn't have cash on me, he would give me nmoneg just to have cash on hand. Ladies need to stop having men they just dating, pick them up or drop them off home. That's a big NO no. I had one follow me home from the grocery store! I thought he lived in the same apt complex so I didn't think anything of the "following car". He parked around the corner, walked to my door, knocked in it and had the unmitigated gall to tell me he followed me, I'm sexy blah blah. I called the police and had a report opened on him and they charged him with stalking. This is not the 50's, 60's 70's 80's or even early 90's. Men are not chivalrous as they used to be. They are psychos just waiting for the perfect opportunity to unalive you.

  • @nothemba1982
    @nothemba1982 Před 2 lety +3

    11:05-12:28 yes! yes! yes! to this. I have never heard anyone put it that way before.

  • @TiffanyRayneOfficial
    @TiffanyRayneOfficial Před 2 lety +3

    At first I was thinking entitlement (and I sense a bit of that too), but it's more so expectation and dangerous it seems like on her end. It's definitely dangerous (especially these days it's real dangerous) to do this with a guy you barely know and it's just the first/second date.

  • @bellaclark5439
    @bellaclark5439 Před 2 lety +3

    Mis Yanie I know this is off topic but I would love tutorial of that eyeshadow 😍 just gorgeous.

    • @khrystal718
      @khrystal718 Před 2 lety

      Looks like burnt orange shadow blended out with a gold shimmer on top

  • @bhadgyaledds3333
    @bhadgyaledds3333 Před 2 lety +4

    I am always seen as a sex object even when I was at my most overweight weight so dunno some parts of this videos invalidated my experience cause I’m always seen as a sex object even though I’m overweight

  • @AdoseofAlana_
    @AdoseofAlana_ Před 2 lety +7

    minute 48 he said most women dont call each other out. he a damn lie! women are the most judgemental we call each other out all the time. alot us do it behind the scenes too but we cant help it if our friends dont always listen lmao. so yeah he a lie!

    • @The1GeminII
      @The1GeminII Před 2 lety

      Exactly! Women call out other women and sometimes it gets quite savage. I’ve heard that trite explanation from men, throughout this platform. They use it as a means by which to castigate, demean, and belittle women. I can’t take any man seriously if he commits an exorbitant amount of time, complaining about women he’ll never encounter. I’m also not interested in a man who has never met a woman he adores. When a man speaks in a manner which shows, he has no respect for women, it’s a complete turnoff.

  • @xLAPPUINx
    @xLAPPUINx Před 2 lety +2

    I love when people have standards they enforce. Women having those is even better. I like Dutch on first few dates too but standards matter, discernment matters.

  • @CHER62006
    @CHER62006 Před 2 lety +2

    Yea i was bullied in high school and middle school. In high school they used to call me me Big Shirley and used to say I look like a man with a wig when I was wearing my real hair. I was tall as well and I didnt like high school really. So imagine when one guy who used to make fun of me daily in woodshop class had the audacity to try to talk to me in the club years later. He didnt even remember me but I reminded his big bird looking self what he did and needless to say he got no number. Im the same one you used to harass and now you want my number. I was called choco bliss by a guy darker than me and then he married a woman fatter than the size he made fun of. in school. Hilarious.

    • @donttalktomeyoureannoying8736
      @donttalktomeyoureannoying8736 Před rokem +2

      Lmfaoooo I’m sorry but the big Shirley thing is so funny, reminds me of Martin. That being said, you are extremely gorgeous and reminds me of Chaka Khan, Pam Greir and you have beautiful hair. Those people you grew up with sound like losers

    • @CHER62006
      @CHER62006 Před rokem

      @@donttalktomeyoureannoying8736 Thank you for the compliments. Yes they were bullies.

  • @100BBs
    @100BBs Před 2 lety +3

    for uber, she doesn’t have to give him her exact address but somewhere near by to pick her up. also, she could’ve asked him to use uber ride share so that she can see when the uber is coming and where she’s going so that she isn’t unaware of where it will be taking her even before she gets in the car. there’s ways to be safe with uber. also, if she wants to be extra safe, she could share her location with a friend or family member so they could keep a watch on her.

  • @danak1600
    @danak1600 Před 2 lety +5

    Yani you look more gorgeous than usual today sis

  • @conniesmith8987
    @conniesmith8987 Před 11 měsíci

    😂😂😂 I love his comedic honesty 😂😂😂

  • @ladypokerdealer
    @ladypokerdealer Před 2 lety +1

    omg Yannie your makeup is so gorgeous today

  • @laer.393
    @laer.393 Před 2 lety +3

    i know it can be hard to consider things this way because we tend to just want all the perks in dating, and it can be nice to see a man just offering to pay for everything and treat you like a princess off rip without even getting to know you, but the reality is that that should ring as a red flag that he isn’t selective ☹️. A man getting to know you before treating you extensively should be a good sign that he ACTUALLY likes you and that the treatment you’re getting is exclusive and not just something he’d give to any woman that he finds slightly attractive. My current boyfriend is a real gentleman and pays for EVERYTHING, hasn’t let me
    touch my wallet since our first date, when i could tell he made the conscious decision to pay for everything because we had good genuine conversation for HOURS. i bought my own bubble tea on our first date (hours of conversation again) but by that second date and we had a great time again, he didn’t hesitate to pull his wallet and nearly flinched when i reached for mine. Selective/picky men are a good thing ladies🤷🏾‍♀️

  • @ascendingLOTUS
    @ascendingLOTUS Před 2 lety +3

    Safety, agreed. He could have zelle’d her the funds though.. me personally, im hardly EVER asking for ANYTHING.. if he isnt forward thinking or considerate, he is not for me, means he is not a leader.. no energy wasted.. I dont think her standards are high at all, a damn uber ride? Come on man.. that’s ridiculous .

  • @amaniiexxchnge
    @amaniiexxchnge Před 2 lety

    Yeah ever since I’ve been able to drive it made dating easier imo. I’ve been set up and been in really scary situations with men if they picking me up. One thing I do love about driving there you can still see how the man approaches you or how he wants to come off. A man can still be a gentleman wait for you open ur door when u arrive etc walk you to ur car back close the door etc and they still leave a good impression.

  • @schokococoa575
    @schokococoa575 Před 2 lety +3

    Nah, expecting someone to pay for your Uber is definitely entitlement. Sure, the guy is asking for her time but she agreed to give it, doesn’t mean he has to pay to get her there smh. If it’s too out of your way, you can communicate that, or just not go on the date.

    • @ultraginger9190
      @ultraginger9190 Před 2 lety +1

      I agree . It's many women now of days operating in this manner.

  • @viyoolacouronne6419
    @viyoolacouronne6419 Před rokem

    This “Egyptian ” at an hbcu said to me he wanted to know what the hype is about black women, I’ve always been on guard with non black men but I never forgot that

  • @Ana-ij2ob
    @Ana-ij2ob Před 2 lety +4

    Tbh I'm happy more and more black women are starting to have standards, but at the same time with these femicide rates why would you want a man to pick you up from your house and you barely know him? Also with the gas prices and her house being out of the way it's normal he wasn't able to pick her up

  • @TeaSipperEsq.
    @TeaSipperEsq. Před 2 lety

    This video made me a subscriber. I am not in these women empowerment spaces because I find the negative and primarily BM bashing (even though my hubs is white, lol but I got a good brother who also happily married and I have definitely dated AINT ISH DUSTY White/NON BLACK Men too so never resonated with any of the *only* black men bashers at all.) but I have been listening to your videos for the past week and this video along with the JIN and JUICE breakdown made me a fan. I resonate with you on almost every single topic. I loved the analogy you gave re sex v money for women v men. Also that men do like doing for women who can 1) do it themselves OR 2)afraid that another man would be able to do it for the woman (that might be why they would walk chards of glass for a supermodel because they are afraid another man would gladly take on that role. In any event, entitlement is NEVER attractive. Not with the "modern" man anyway and it is extremely danger to give your address to a stranger who you are just getting to know. I am married and for 12+ years my husband still does more but I don't and have never demanded* anything even from the first to all dates in the first year where he paid for everything. I still did not demand and he never demanded sex in the beginning either. I see so many women be like "I kNoW mY wOrth" based on what they see and hear and many people in general do not know themselves well enough. Also I like you emphasize HEALING. Healing and Leveling up is truly the key to getting a respectable man to commit and invest. Theres a lot of wisdom here Yanie. Great video sis

  • @iamtheboneofmysword607

    Yanie, you're so pretty💜

  • @tinyteenyafrozastrology8602

    Greatest things since sliced 🍞, this was a healthy meal to absorb🙏🏾brings to open up myself more within my mindset of what more do I need?🙏🏾

  • @SpiceItUp_5150
    @SpiceItUp_5150 Před rokem

    I wouldn’t won’t a man to know where I live or my associated areas/spots where I be at. I’m driving and meeting him there. Periodeeet. I have to know more about a man outside of just our one on one meet ups. It’s very important to know how they interact with and around other people. I looooooove a gentleman from the heart and a man that makes me laugh. Those are at the top of my list.