Conan Catches Jordan Schlansky Coming In Late | CONAN on TBS

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  • čas přidán 6. 08. 2013
  • Conan investigates why Jordan rolls in past noon and discovers his creepy morning routines.
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    ABOUT CONAN ON TBS
    Airing weeknights since 2010, CONAN on TBS is home to topical monologues, remote segments, celebrity interviews, musical performances and stand-up from the top comedians in the world. Watch highlights, outtakes and behind the scenes footage of Conan palling around with sidekick Andy Richter, tormenting Associate Producer Jordan Schlansky and playing the latest video games on Clueless Gamer.
    ABOUT TEAM COCO
    Team Coco is the CZcams home for all things Conan O’Brien and the Team Coco Podcast Network. Team Coco features over 25 years of comedy sketches, celebrity interviews and stand-up comedy sets from CONAN on TBS and Late Night with Conan O’Brien, as well as exclusive videos from podcasts like Conan O’Brien Needs a Friend, Literally! with Rob Lowe, Why Won’t You Date Me? with Nicole Byer, The Three Questions with Andy Richter, May I Elaborate? with JB Smoove and Scam Goddess with Laci Mosley.
    Conan Catches Jordan Schlansky Coming In Late | CONAN on TBS
    / teamcoco
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Komentáře • 10K

  • @t.p.w.6343
    @t.p.w.6343 Před 5 lety +30651

    This video is a gateway drug into Jordan Schlansky Saga.

    • @dabbyt3800
      @dabbyt3800 Před 5 lety +36

      Tayna Weher yes it is 😂😂

    • @aryanrana6369
      @aryanrana6369 Před 5 lety +77

      For me it is the end coz ive seen all the others already

    • @mumin9436
      @mumin9436 Před 5 lety +6

      Yes yes yes 😂👌

    • @GS-kj6ur
      @GS-kj6ur Před 5 lety +36

      Just joined today these are hilarious

    • @michaelheath2866
      @michaelheath2866 Před 5 lety +21

      Yeap, I've seen all of them, and I keep Jonesing for more.

  • @samflynn97
    @samflynn97 Před 5 lety +3912

    6:56 "You're not making eye contact with me."
    "Why would I?"
    This man has a lot of experience with interrogations...

    • @nicomas2471
      @nicomas2471 Před 5 lety +24

      omg didn't notice that, thanks lol

    • @Tyler-eq6hp
      @Tyler-eq6hp Před 4 lety +52

      It's part of his various roles and responsibilities

    • @marisad9856
      @marisad9856 Před 4 lety +4

      @@Tyler-eq6hp various...lol

    • @danieldmyers
      @danieldmyers Před 4 lety +1

      420 basically abusing him? Yeesh. Get a boss.

    • @marcogiordano1207
      @marcogiordano1207 Před 4 lety

      @@danieldmyers work alone. Thats better

  • @DanFlashes99
    @DanFlashes99 Před 2 lety +1815

    "I've been experimenting with oats and whey" is one of the funniest lines ever uttered on this show

    • @joliecide
      @joliecide Před rokem +16

      Maybe he was curious...

    • @alexanderdeadmansche
      @alexanderdeadmansche Před rokem +17

      Hilarious that he goes into so much detail

    • @MrPlant597
      @MrPlant597 Před 8 měsíci +23

      Sounds like Patrick Bateman haha

    • @timy9197
      @timy9197 Před 4 měsíci +7

      But did you know that he prepares his body in various ways?

    • @Thomas-ib8fe
      @Thomas-ib8fe Před 4 měsíci +11

      Very few people noticed he emphasizes "immediately" as if he quite literally immediately as he wakes up reaches to his side and drinks a prepared shake!

  • @astroloudboy
    @astroloudboy Před rokem +1751

    3:11 *Jordan showing his card like it's FBI badge had me rolling* 😂

  • @victor_r.m
    @victor_r.m Před 4 lety +16482

    He got him with that “I’ve worked for a living”😂

  • @chsandstrom
    @chsandstrom Před 4 lety +14768

    ”My lack of awareness of the time is not responsible for the hour that I arrive in the office”

    • @pillar350
      @pillar350 Před 4 lety +284

      Mirk Jerken best line ever

    • @angieb976
      @angieb976 Před 4 lety +489

      They need to make a movie and have a douchie character inspired by this guy with this guys lines

    • @Standin.Fallen
      @Standin.Fallen Před 4 lety +156

      I should use this in school

    • @castlehill6717
      @castlehill6717 Před 4 lety +138

      Low key sick line, lol

    • @yalamburrrr
      @yalamburrrr Před 4 lety +65

      Low key a bar

  • @asemfarouk9741
    @asemfarouk9741 Před 3 lety +5998

    Conan: “you’re not making eye contact with me”
    Jordan: WHY WOULD I?

    • @glp046
      @glp046 Před 3 lety +290

      I think he avoids eye contact with Conan When he's on the verge of cracking up.

    • @benfulfer3260
      @benfulfer3260 Před 3 lety +117

      Unlike Ellen, Conan invites eye contact from his employees

    • @joyandpeacefullaughter5307
      @joyandpeacefullaughter5307 Před 3 lety +91

      @@glp046 Or he's just super introverted. I hate eye contact. It's useless to me.

    • @lukebennett1648
      @lukebennett1648 Před 3 lety +11

      @@joyandpeacefullaughter5307 me too

    • @clamdigger1602
      @clamdigger1602 Před 2 lety +19

      @@joyandpeacefullaughter5307 Well, he's acting, but you should get over that because it's not a good look in job interviews, etc. (no pun intended)

  • @gabriellex6142
    @gabriellex6142 Před rokem +2332

    This is an all-time classic! 9 years later and I still revisit this piece of art from time to time!!

  • @entertain7us148
    @entertain7us148 Před 5 lety +6925

    "you've studied humans on our planet for a while"

  • @AishwaryaNet
    @AishwaryaNet Před 5 lety +7643

    "Then I prepared my body in various ways" 🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂

  • @samfilmkid
    @samfilmkid Před rokem +1481

    The cocktail of giddiness, amazement and murderous rage on Conan's face when he realizes the gold mine of comedy he has discovered right under his nose is the most underrated part of this video.

    • @hellterminator
      @hellterminator Před rokem +29

      Sorry, but you're just reading too much into it. Conan didn't discover anything here, he had been doing Jordan remotes even back in New York.

    • @maulds7650
      @maulds7650 Před 11 měsíci +44

      @@hellterminator Every segment he does with Jordan is like that though, that's why every segment is an escalation

  • @andrewfroese1067
    @andrewfroese1067 Před rokem +629

    “You put the time card in the middle. Do you know how I know? I’ve worked for a living.”
    Conan throwing shade at Jordan is the best.

  • @PrettyProChannel
    @PrettyProChannel Před 3 lety +5332

    "Remove your shirt. What part of your body did you shave?"
    "My face."

    • @seanA416
      @seanA416 Před 3 lety +207

      "What about down south?"
      "That's private."
      "But you just took off your shirt"

    • @FriendlyCroock
      @FriendlyCroock Před 3 lety +30

      @@seanA416
      You don't need to quote the entire thing.

    • @mikrogoon
      @mikrogoon Před 3 lety +28

      "I'm just asking if you shave your John Dory, do you?

    • @myy1008
      @myy1008 Před 3 lety +51

      @@FriendlyCroock you're part of the problem

    • @Hchris101
      @Hchris101 Před 3 lety +5

      I hug fully clothed grandmas

  • @Kvmilla
    @Kvmilla Před 7 lety +8647

    "I've worked for a living" THE SHADE

    • @manictiger
      @manictiger Před 6 lety +305

      Step 1: Fold ice pack until you hear a crunch sound
      Step 2: Apply ice pack to affected burn area

    • @cod-slayer2697
      @cod-slayer2697 Před 6 lety

      Kvmilla 4

    • @um-mr9jf
      @um-mr9jf Před 6 lety +3

      Kvmilla I don't get it

    • @MarcHershey
      @MarcHershey Před 6 lety +62

      He didn't even do it correctly lol the sheet is to go sideways LOL

    • @NattyMattyD
      @NattyMattyD Před 6 lety

      Kvmilla i

  • @adiantum7124
    @adiantum7124 Před 3 lety +2183

    4:57 "I prepared my body in various ways"
    the words hit my brain that is my best words what I had ever heard... Jorden you re genius

    • @davec3651
      @davec3651 Před 3 lety +42

      It totally applies to us all though. It can mean anything from eating breakfast to washing hands, or exercising. "Various" really is a magical word.

    • @jAYROCCS1x
      @jAYROCCS1x Před 3 lety +42

      your words hurt my brain reading this comment

    • @David-tq8ok
      @David-tq8ok Před 2 lety +14

      @@jAYROCCS1x various words

    • @peteralbrecht473
      @peteralbrecht473 Před 2 lety +14

      Isn't that a quote from American Psycho?

    • @alexanderdeadmansche
      @alexanderdeadmansche Před rokem +5

      Such a funny way of putting it. I also love that he has to include the fact that he’s been experimenting with oats and whey

  • @ern1982
    @ern1982 Před 3 lety +287

    "I prepare my body in various ways" is iconic at this point

    • @NiVi192
      @NiVi192 Před 28 dny +1

      Somebody's gotta put that on the back of a t-shirt!

  • @PantheonContent
    @PantheonContent Před 4 lety +1759

    "I Prepared my body in various ways" is the best quote ever.

    • @gfox9295
      @gfox9295 Před 4 lety +17

      And so useful in so very many possible situations!

    • @MrTruth111
      @MrTruth111 Před 4 lety +14

      lol that response will certainly stop any further questioning about being late

  • @RG-vp6br
    @RG-vp6br Před 4 lety +4401

    “What do you think the human response would be ?” Hahah

  • @emanuelflores7180
    @emanuelflores7180 Před 4 měsíci +1726

    Who’s still watching this in 2024!?

  • @rkline65
    @rkline65 Před 3 lety +247

    Of all the Jordan skits, THIS one never gets old.....

    • @theaveragemegaguy
      @theaveragemegaguy Před 3 lety +12

      Seriously this was the first one I saw and every time I watch it I die of laughter

    • @pablot-r9402
      @pablot-r9402 Před 2 měsíci

      It's certainly one of the most sincere, and is a great introductory video to those we are trying to introduce to the Conan + Jordan saga! The only thing more we could ever wish for is for these two to have met each other sooner! So much situational / conversational comedy gold! 💛

  • @trevor_on_youtube2809
    @trevor_on_youtube2809 Před 4 lety +2468

    Jordan sounds like he walked into “To Catch a Predator”

  • @justsayin3535
    @justsayin3535 Před 7 lety +6311

    "is your intention to hang on to these or to give them to a worthy childrens charity?"
    "undecided"

    • @kamikoto1558
      @kamikoto1558 Před 6 lety +26

      just sayin nearly 1k likes but no replies well heres mine

    • @wazzzaaa341
      @wazzzaaa341 Před 6 lety +24

      just sayin your profile picture is everything 😂😂

    • @TheChuchurocket
      @TheChuchurocket Před 6 lety +38

      "to make sure that one of my workers is a real.. busy bee"
      "buzz buzz"

    • @madsrempt8027
      @madsrempt8027 Před 6 lety +1

      just sayin v.

    • @freddycorcoran5937
      @freddycorcoran5937 Před 6 lety +1

      I just heard that as I was reading

  • @Rocketmanrun
    @Rocketmanrun Před 3 lety +276

    "Ive been experimenting with oats and whey." Quite possibly my favorite line ever

    • @Rocketmanrun
      @Rocketmanrun Před rokem +4

      Same

    • @billbauer9795
      @billbauer9795 Před 2 měsíci

      Why? I don't get it.

    • @EricThomason
      @EricThomason Před měsícem +1

      @@billbauer9795 Because it's delivered at such a funny time. Conan is trying to interrogate him about his tardiness and he responds with oddly specific details of his breakfast shake

  • @catdaddydonbrewer007
    @catdaddydonbrewer007 Před rokem +1097

    Conan will go down in history as the all time funniest talk show host in the history of television!

    • @belltolls1984
      @belltolls1984 Před rokem +4

      Absolutely!

    • @farrel_ra
      @farrel_ra Před rokem +5

      Agree 💯

    • @alru5792
      @alru5792 Před rokem +1

      Conan is pretty funny, but definitely NOT one of the best ever.

    • @catdaddydonbrewer007
      @catdaddydonbrewer007 Před rokem +13

      @@alru5792 name 3 living talk show host that are better and name 3 dead talk show host better. Cause there’s only been maybe 20 relevant known talkshow host ever.

    • @maly_bobon3352
      @maly_bobon3352 Před rokem +4

      @@catdaddydonbrewer007 eric andre

  • @txmoney
    @txmoney Před 5 lety +2981

    “I’ve worked for a living”. That was savage!

    • @ExileOnDaytonStreet
      @ExileOnDaytonStreet Před 4 lety +43

      txmoney That was glorious

    • @LordLazo
      @LordLazo Před 4 lety +68

      txmoney
      Jordan got murdered on that one

    • @mrjack8849
      @mrjack8849 Před 4 lety +41

      Even my mom in her 60s laughed at that.

    • @OMW-on4vk
      @OMW-on4vk Před 4 lety +58

      It’s true as well, Conan got screwed a lot of times before and he always refused to give up and always come out on top

    • @googelle7555
      @googelle7555 Před 4 lety +3

      I've watched and laughed at this part so many times, which now makes me wonder .. I wonder what Jordan did for a living before Conan.
      #toolazytowikisearch

  • @herropreaseherro7870
    @herropreaseherro7870 Před 4 lety +5343

    Meanwhile, Sona just finished four seasons of Friends

    • @keithpatrick156
      @keithpatrick156 Před 3 lety +174

      She prepared her mind in various ways. Watched "Friends"...."Gigolos"...

    • @ligregni
      @ligregni Před 3 lety +60

      but she got to the office on time

    • @firecrackerjack68
      @firecrackerjack68 Před 2 lety +53

      @@ligregni but Jordan has various tasks and duties as an associate producer.

    • @tonypele7054
      @tonypele7054 Před 2 lety +5

      🤣🤣

    • @neldormiveglia1312
      @neldormiveglia1312 Před 2 lety +7

      @@ligregni uh yeah, you gotta start your series marathons early

  • @allison1507
    @allison1507 Před 3 lety +382

    Who else is here rewatching these after finding out Conan is ending his late night show?

    • @sunritroykarmakar4406
      @sunritroykarmakar4406 Před 2 lety +3

      me

    • @georgieacero7043
      @georgieacero7043 Před 2 lety +4

      WHAT NO

    • @12structures
      @12structures Před 2 lety +3

      so sad. I don't get why, other than them forcing him out, Im assuming because he wont' ago along with these late night 'hosts' agenda, aka Team Biden / Communism affiliates such as Kimmel, Seth, Colbert, etc..

    • @xxwhispersxx2856
      @xxwhispersxx2856 Před 2 lety +5

      12structures, he got another show on HBO, and HBO pays a hell of a lot more. Follow the money.

    • @arthursdl
      @arthursdl Před 2 lety +8

      @@12structures I hope you make a friend one day

  • @channelmixer
    @channelmixer Před 3 lety +416

    I swear I was depressed in early February and then I discovered and binge watch all of the Conan and Jordan videos and my depression lifted. I am being serious! Conan rocks!

  • @jeremiahhyslip5803
    @jeremiahhyslip5803 Před 4 lety +4513

    Anyone else notice at 8:27 that Jordan’s office plaque says “One Cranky Fake Italian”??

    • @Mauro0
      @Mauro0 Před 4 lety +75

      Nice catch!!

    • @solkels_z4794
      @solkels_z4794 Před 4 lety +155

      also is that the 500 dollar espresso machine in the back? 4:10

    • @MeMe-td1ye
      @MeMe-td1ye Před 3 lety +3

      Where??

    • @jeremiahhyslip5803
      @jeremiahhyslip5803 Před 3 lety +7

      @@MeMe-td1ye The sign right next to his head! Can be seen clearly if you pause at 8:29

    • @MeMe-td1ye
      @MeMe-td1ye Před 3 lety

      @@jeremiahhyslip5803 in Italian??

  • @jasminkhangura3832
    @jasminkhangura3832 Před 8 lety +6682

    I am just discovering the miracle that is Jordan Schlansky. Binge witching what I've missed all these years

  • @GammaX13
    @GammaX13 Před 2 lety +742

    "I've been experimenting with oats and whey"
    "I prepared my body in various ways"
    This is a great first episode of the Jordan Schlansky Saga

    • @user-bz7hz4jl1t
      @user-bz7hz4jl1t Před rokem +7

      I think the character originated earlier, but good intro to the character nonetheless

    • @mahalalel27
      @mahalalel27 Před rokem

      Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock:
      And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock.
      And every one that heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them not, shall be likened unto a foolish man, which built his house upon the sand:
      And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell: and great was the fall of it.
      Matthew 7:24-27 💙✨

    • @alecedgerly1277
      @alecedgerly1277 Před 11 měsíci +3

      Yeah, this is where you’re really gonna save ‘em lmao, in the comments section of a youtube video.

    • @stormrevenant
      @stormrevenant Před 7 měsíci +1

      It's not the first episode, the first episodes were meeting Jordan, house hunting with Jordan, Conan and Jordan visits Italian restaurant, and coffee machine.

  • @EnterShikari777
    @EnterShikari777 Před 4 měsíci +36

    The part when Conan says “You’re not making eye contact with me” and Jordan’s response is “Why would I?” always kills me

  • @ragerodracir
    @ragerodracir Před 5 lety +2999

    he just stands in his office, shirtless in front of his boss, with his hands in his pockets

    • @ASHISHPATEL-ot3lu
      @ASHISHPATEL-ot3lu Před 5 lety +285

      Wearing a pair of sunglasses

    • @ohhhboyyy7625
      @ohhhboyyy7625 Před 5 lety +306

      While he explains how he prepares his body in various ways

    • @Teck0ne1
      @Teck0ne1 Před 5 lety +121

      In such a monotone voice ...

    • @geo865833
      @geo865833 Před 4 lety +140

      If that is not badassery, then I don't know what is.

    • @BlueEyes-WhiteDrag0n
      @BlueEyes-WhiteDrag0n Před 4 lety +37

      @@geo865833 once i ate a whole sandwich in one bite

  • @michaelbross5687
    @michaelbross5687 Před 4 lety +3397

    He looks like the kind of guy who would try to avoid synthetic maltodextrin.

  • @joesmith332
    @joesmith332 Před 3 lety +103

    6:55 Conan: "You're not making eye contact with me."
    Jordan: "Why would I?"

  • @mariaaaaaaaaaaa01
    @mariaaaaaaaaaaa01 Před 2 lety +55

    1:23 glad to see that Jordan fully relocated the espresso machine into his office 🤣

  • @AceBobcat
    @AceBobcat Před 8 lety +2589

    Jordon's probably the real life version of Dexter Morgan.

  • @SonOfMuta
    @SonOfMuta Před 7 lety +2834

    "Know how I know it was the center? Because I've worked for a living." I believe the mic has been dropped

    • @kinglyyasin5985
      @kinglyyasin5985 Před 7 lety +14

      ikr

    • @roba6356
      @roba6356 Před 7 lety +71

      Best part of the skit

    • @MrGbounds
      @MrGbounds Před 7 lety +95

      That was one of those savage moments that you just don't cross. Lol

    • @UseToPewProfessionally
      @UseToPewProfessionally Před 7 lety +5

      The Son of Muta that part killed me ha!

    • @harryscheuerle659
      @harryscheuerle659 Před 7 lety +22

      except that he didn't tell him he had to punch it sideways. so im not sure hes ever used one

  • @sntsk
    @sntsk Před 3 lety +71

    I come here twice a month to hear Jordon say "Then I prepared my body in various ways" 😂

    • @ArchibaldClumpy
      @ArchibaldClumpy Před 2 lety

      They should put that line in the Dexter reboot.
      "I watch them. They don't know I watch them. I prepare my body in various ways. I am the lamb, and the slaughter."

  • @fasteddylove-muffin6415
    @fasteddylove-muffin6415 Před 3 lety +161

    "You've studied humans on our planet for awhile." Hilarious. Probably true too.

  • @supermigit999
    @supermigit999 Před 4 lety +9334

    One day Conan is going to go missing, and we will all know who did it.

  • @ellisguerrero212
    @ellisguerrero212 Před 6 lety +3539

    *"I PREPARED MY BODY IN VARIOUS WAYS"*

  • @marksparroweducation
    @marksparroweducation Před rokem +87

    I don't know why but whenever the exam period starts, I somehow end up on a Schlansky marathon

    • @Alex_1729
      @Alex_1729 Před rokem +8

      You're procrastinating. Watching Schlansky videos is what you do when dealing with stress. You've made a habit out of it. Cue, Craving, Response, Reward. Stress appears, wanting relief, watching videos, feeling good. If you want to pass the exams, you need to break the cycle. If you need more psychological analysis just reply with something 😂

    • @HeroicHaroon
      @HeroicHaroon Před rokem

      @@Alex_1729 goddamn bruh, tell us more

  • @gopikrishnasamsu
    @gopikrishnasamsu Před 2 lety +92

    Ten years and this is still comedy gold😂

  • @anthonysclafani3963
    @anthonysclafani3963 Před 6 lety +3331

    "In case he ever makes a friend"

  • @dpatel313
    @dpatel313 Před 4 lety +2448

    How a human would say , "got ready"?
    "Prepared my body in various ways"
    Nailed it 👍

  • @matthewadair4507
    @matthewadair4507 Před 11 měsíci +24

    This’ll be 10 years old next month. Time flies when on a Conan/Jordan Schanlsky binge fest.

  • @mickhernandez2665
    @mickhernandez2665 Před 2 lety +23

    5:37 all the ladies watching gone absolutely hysterical here

    • @scottw6704
      @scottw6704 Před 4 měsíci +4

      and roughly 15 percent of the men

  • @neo3888
    @neo3888 Před 6 lety +13252

    Jordan Schlansky - The only person who could pull off being a nerd, a creep, a robot, and a douchebag all at the same time

  • @URAWESOME94
    @URAWESOME94 Před 4 lety +1963

    The blank, lifeless look on his face along with his monotone speaking absolutely kills me every time. I’ve only recently found this vids and they’re pure gold.

    • @largol33t1
      @largol33t1 Před 4 lety +22

      I love when Conan goes out on "field trips" and drags Jordan with him. They're the modern day version of Stan & Ollie! 😁

    • @gikgik4254
      @gikgik4254 Před rokem +2

      Probably Xanax or oxys

    • @Psydvckthefirst
      @Psydvckthefirst Před rokem

      @@gikgik4254 5 years in a good improv theater

    • @mahalalel27
      @mahalalel27 Před rokem

      Blessed is the man that trusteth in the Lord,
      and whose hope the Lord is.
      For he shall be as a tree planted by the waters,
      and that spreadeth out her roots by the river,
      and shall not see when heat cometh,
      but her leaf shall be green;
      and shall not be careful in the year of drought,
      neither shall cease from yielding fruit.
      Jeremiah 17:7-8 💙✨

    • @URAWESOME94
      @URAWESOME94 Před rokem +3

      @@mahalalel27 that has absolutely nothing to do with my three year old comment.

  • @fletcherreed3259
    @fletcherreed3259 Před 3 lety +73

    I think Jordan legitimately has anxiety issues around Conan LOL the look of relief on his face when Conan finally walks away is priceless

  • @priyabuddhavarapu
    @priyabuddhavarapu Před 10 měsíci +17

    It’s been ten years since I saw this video and the phrase “I prepared my body in various ways” still sends me into the stratosphere every time I hear it

  • @hidayatghozali
    @hidayatghozali Před 4 lety +2068

    8:29 the sign to his office says "Jordan Schlansky One Cranky Fake Italian"

  • @stormwatcheagle5448
    @stormwatcheagle5448 Před 4 lety +3175

    This man is a vulcan. There is a starship somewhere missing its science officer.

    • @brucewayne4483
      @brucewayne4483 Před 4 lety +9

      Lmfao!!!

    • @leoscorpio42
      @leoscorpio42 Před 4 lety +21

      Evan Reeves "...without taking up an inordinate amount of desk space." = Yeah, Vulcan makes sense.

    • @googleuser2874
      @googleuser2874 Před 4 lety +22

      He's the human version of Spock.

    • @TipsyMcStumble82
      @TipsyMcStumble82 Před 4 lety +10

      I definitely get a Tuvok vibe from him.

    • @roguesheep3083
      @roguesheep3083 Před 3 lety +6

      Apparently, it's an act, but he is only exxagerating his actual self.

  • @QueerlyBeloved_
    @QueerlyBeloved_ Před 2 lety +24

    "You're not making eye contact with me."
    "Why would I?"
    😂

  • @alexkozlovsky8233
    @alexkozlovsky8233 Před rokem +40

    I re-watch this clip once every few months and it never fails to make me happy.

  • @davidpulatov9987
    @davidpulatov9987 Před 4 lety +5740

    Judge: you're still looking at 6 years
    6ix9ine: do you know what Jordan does on Friday’s?

  • @FrankieBeanss
    @FrankieBeanss Před 8 lety +1752

    anyone notice that the coffee maker is now in his room lol

    • @sya286
      @sya286 Před 8 lety +2

      Yasss hahaha

    • @shellsy515
      @shellsy515 Před 8 lety +17

      It looked like it was in the hall.

    • @BabyBillo
      @BabyBillo Před 8 lety +8

      +FrankieBeans it's still in the hall. you can see it as jordan walks in. that is another one

    • @joewouldknow
      @joewouldknow Před 8 lety +3

      +BabyBillo Excellent catch there, I didn't notice. I think it's hilarious that he bought another one!

    • @ConjahConj
      @ConjahConj Před 8 lety +1

      +FrankieBeans thats a printer you idiots, do you know what a printer is?

  • @trizr0387
    @trizr0387 Před 2 lety +36

    I love how conan laughs his ass off when jordan says "ive been experimenting with oats and whey"

  • @duckbert3314
    @duckbert3314 Před 2 lety +21

    "I prepare my body in various ways" he says that so creepily yet funnily at the same time. Pure gold.

  • @kgisabeast
    @kgisabeast Před 4 lety +7098

    Conan is hands down the funniest late night host. He’s actually a comedy genius. He even wrote a lot of the golden era simpsons episodes

    • @exildur
      @exildur Před 4 lety +210

      Wow, I had to look this up to confirm. I never knew that! Now I like Conan even more!!

    • @misskorah4291
      @misskorah4291 Před 4 lety +11

      Lukas ANDY RICHTER IS WAY FUNNIER THAN CONAN.

    • @yeltsin6817
      @yeltsin6817 Před 4 lety +103

      His IQ is apparently very high

    • @futuropasado
      @futuropasado Před 4 lety +10

      what episodes¿¿??? i want to know

    • @adgato75
      @adgato75 Před 4 lety +98

      @@futuropasado You'd have to look it up , but apparently he ended up very influential on The Simpsons. From what I have read , Conan was the main motivator for taking the show from a boring animated sitcom ( which it was , early on ) to a more interesting kinda crazy version with strange episodes. I think people point to the Monorail episode as being when that shift started to take place.

  • @faderpie
    @faderpie Před 9 lety +380

    "Then, I prepared my body in various ways."
    LMFAO

  • @bBeuh2992
    @bBeuh2992 Před 3 lety +67

    I always come back to these videos of Conan terrorizing Jordan every couple of years just to have a good laugh

  • @scytheria7
    @scytheria7 Před 2 lety +72

    Jordan could honestly be The Office James Bond if that makes sense lmao… the physique, clear familiarity with being interrogated, articulation and vaguely European vibe… 10/10

  • @Joey_Shepard
    @Joey_Shepard Před 5 lety +764

    3:29 Love how Jordan casually throws his jacket at his pile of crap

    • @gogogoooooooooo
      @gogogoooooooooo Před 4 lety +10

      We don’t see it, but there’s actually an open couch behind the boxes lmao.

  • @PoTato-wk8gh
    @PoTato-wk8gh Před 5 lety +2294

    I can't believe this isn't scripted...pure gold

    • @francescomarialeo
      @francescomarialeo Před 5 lety +228

      Jordan is a character but nothing is predefined. It 's half true

    • @Peter_1986
      @Peter_1986 Před 5 lety +36

      +Po Tato
      I personally think that that's the only way to really make a conversation sound natural - most movies have a very distinct "acting feel" to them since the actors have to follow scripts, and it will typically sound a lot more natural if you let the actors improvise their lines.
      It may be less practical, but it will feel more genuine and "real".

    • @BlueEyes-WhiteDrag0n
      @BlueEyes-WhiteDrag0n Před 5 lety +45

      Just search *Jordan Schlasky Breaking Character*
      _It's just that he is playing a Role of a Weird Human. But in reality he also is just a Simple guy who laughs at Conan's Jokes. But don't watch the video or you might not feel the Humour in these videos anymore_

    • @jason2014
      @jason2014 Před 5 lety +11

      @@francescomarialeo To think this isn't scripted is a lie to yourself and your own dignity.

    • @charlesxav6817
      @charlesxav6817 Před 5 lety +12

      I personally believe it’s not scripted, and that Jordan wasn’t notified about Conan’s visit to his office. Here’s why:
      1) Jordan spoke with a normal tone at the beginning, “ Feels like an acceptable reaction to me”. The “ to me “ part is a bit highly tuned, which implied a plea of guilty.
      2) Jordan seemed rather surprised when he realised there’s a camera crew in there.

  • @musiqa-workshops
    @musiqa-workshops Před 10 měsíci +57

    Knowing that this is not scripted you have to appreciate how well Jordan depleted Conans attacks in the first 3 minutes. He actually went boss mode all the way, from throwing his jacket into the trash pile to preparing his body in various ways and keeping his shades on after arriving at work at 1 PM, then making Conan thirsty by taking his shirt of while calmly disclaiming "I only shaved my face". Jordan is the man.

    • @user-qn9tm8yp5b
      @user-qn9tm8yp5b Před 6 měsíci +1

      It's semi scripted.

    • @CapoElChivo
      @CapoElChivo Před 4 měsíci +2

      ⁠@@user-qn9tm8yp5bin a reddit AMA Schlansky confirmed the Espresso remote and some others werent scripted, I’d bet a lot of the milder office prank skits like this are unscripted.

    • @NinuRenee
      @NinuRenee Před 3 měsíci +2

      I dont know how Jordan is in real life, but the way he portrays himself in Conan's show to me just looks and sounds like someone who hasnt come out or even to terms with their asperger/alexithymia. I never realized his traits being ASD back then but now in hindsight it's painfully obvious.

  • @paulevans6066
    @paulevans6066 Před rokem +60

    Jordan almost broke character at 6:05 lol

    • @theallamerican3778
      @theallamerican3778 Před rokem

      "In terms of talking about my daily grooming rituals" 🤣🤣🤣

    • @NinuRenee
      @NinuRenee Před 3 měsíci

      the way his voice faltered just proves it was an unscripted line cause it made him uncomfortable answering and continuing the topic

  • @pradyunmanoj6716
    @pradyunmanoj6716 Před 3 lety +2140

    3:07
    the funny thing is, u expect him in the car, and then he comes in his scooter 😂🤣🛵

    • @klaus_lima
      @klaus_lima Před 3 lety +184

      As he thinks a stereotypical italian does.

    • @user-cn4se7ui6j
      @user-cn4se7ui6j Před 3 lety +7

      😂

    • @pradyunmanoj6716
      @pradyunmanoj6716 Před 3 lety +5

      @@user-cn4se7ui6j lmao

    • @amoreazione3563
      @amoreazione3563 Před 3 lety +95

      he's driving a Vespa which is the quintessential Italian scooter. And fun fact: many Italians, rich or poor, do drive to their workplace on vespas

    • @davidbustamante7278
      @davidbustamante7278 Před 3 lety +39

      @@amoreazione3563 damn he’s obsessed with italians

  • @liesoul
    @liesoul Před 8 lety +378

    jordan almost cracked at the body shaving part

    • @louieis1337
      @louieis1337 Před 8 lety +3

      Lmao true

    • @FishoD
      @FishoD Před 8 lety +11

      exactly, no matter how many times Conan says he is real it is clear he plays a character...

    • @Janette388
      @Janette388 Před 8 lety +3

      +Fisho D yea if Jordan isnt real .well what a great actor!! cause i would be laughing throught the whole video😂

    • @MannyJohnson1984
      @MannyJohnson1984 Před 7 lety +2

      +Fisho D Aaron debunked this in StreamCoco. Jordan is a real lol

    • @xgalarion8659
      @xgalarion8659 Před 7 lety

      timmy timson consider that conan said wikibear is totally real, and a lot of other things. I think schlansky is real though, there are weird people.

  • @justanotheryoutubefan8070
    @justanotheryoutubefan8070 Před 2 lety +20

    This clip, along with all the other Jordan ones, will never get old

  • @abhishekpratapnigam
    @abhishekpratapnigam Před 10 měsíci +17

    No matter how many times you watch Jordan remotes it still remains funny

  • @LeoCharles
    @LeoCharles Před 8 lety +280

    "I prepare my body in various ways" im using that sentece before going out for now on lol

  • @WineProneCowboy
    @WineProneCowboy Před 4 lety +4727

    I just noticed that Jordan is wearing a Google t-shirt in this video. Proof that he is late to work on Fridays because he has to go to a Google lab first for his weekly recalibration?

    • @rosieej5267
      @rosieej5267 Před 3 lety +13

      Will you explain that please?

    • @szepi79
      @szepi79 Před 3 lety +177

      @@rosieej5267 the butt of the joke is that Jordan isn't human, but a prototype robot, who needs to be recalibrated to fool the regular humans.

    • @georgecampbell9638
      @georgecampbell9638 Před 3 lety +5

      Yeah I think your right. Jordon must be a robot because he’s emotionless, stubborn, stiff and a creep. Elon Musk may be a robot too

    • @dacsus
      @dacsus Před 3 lety +9

      @@szepi79 It looks like Rosiee J is also going to get recalibrated...

    • @CalvinJary
      @CalvinJary Před 3 lety +5

      Clearly they have work to do if a freshly calibrated Jordan acts like that.

  • @dman2159
    @dman2159 Před 3 lety +36

    All of Conan’s remotes are fcking hilarious. Really cured my depression!

  • @radioactivepotato2068
    @radioactivepotato2068 Před 2 lety +43

    Jordan is to Conan what Karl Pilkington is to Ricky Gervais. Sure, there's an element of theatre, but fundamentally, we're talking about a megastar seeing something special in a person they work with, sharing that interest with the world, and ultimately becoming good mates.
    There's millions of people, who have little idiosyncrasies that just keep you entertained. Not like a clown, or the butt of the joke, but because you can see yourself relating to them and all their weirdness.

  • @mei5102
    @mei5102 Před 6 lety +637

    I thought it was Jordan in the black car, but then I saw the red scooter 😂😂😂😂😂

  • @aypeey8831
    @aypeey8831 Před 5 lety +1361

    I've worked for a living...absolutely killed me how he destroyed him in 5 words 😂😂

    • @peaceduke1
      @peaceduke1 Před 5 lety +4

      I didn't get it. Could you please explain it to me?

    • @MrJovanify
      @MrJovanify Před 5 lety +74

      @@peaceduke1 Conan is stating that he used to work a 9 to 5 job in which he is pay by the hour and up to 40 hours a week. People would clock in using those time cards back in the day, then clock out when there shift is done. Those who are paid salary don't have the luxury of having a "fixed" time to work and generally work for more than 40 hours getting paid the same salary regardless how long they have worked for that week.
      In Jordan's case. He makes the joke because it is assume that Jordan never gotten paid hourly in his life, instead is paid a salary.
      edit: On top of that, salary pay is normally given to upper position like management.

    • @MrZackavelli
      @MrZackavelli Před 5 lety +4

      That's more like four words and a letter

    • @Ken.-
      @Ken.- Před 5 lety +12

      He still didn't use the punch clock correctly. You know how I knew....

    • @antpat
      @antpat Před 5 lety +6

      Conan probably worked a real job for a few months now claims to have "worked for a living" so he doesn't alienate his viewers being a millionaire... Rich people are always downplaying their status to appease their working slob viewers.

  • @CorporalCanada
    @CorporalCanada Před 3 lety +263

    The man is trying so hard not to break character
    *It's hilarious*

    • @homesick2513
      @homesick2513 Před 3 lety +34

      It's not a character, that's just an exaggerated version of him, it's not scripted nor a character therefore he doesn't ''break it''

  • @brianmorrissey554
    @brianmorrissey554 Před 3 lety +11

    This is Golden age stuff. The whole Sona, Jordan thing. The trips abroad. Conan is one of the greats.

  • @SmylzMuzik
    @SmylzMuzik Před 5 lety +3695

    Conan: okay jordan, no matter what you do, you're gonna keep your job, BUT i get to make fun of you publicly in front of millions of people.
    Jordan: I accept this pact as a form of intellectual rebellion.

  • @Dmdm_dm
    @Dmdm_dm Před 5 lety +8283

    Is no one gonna comment that Jordan is amazingly fit for a guy in his 40s?

    • @sjrn24
      @sjrn24 Před 5 lety +3017

      That's what you get when you experiment with oats and whey

    • @Smurffitness
      @Smurffitness Před 5 lety +447

      not sure if amazing is the word. dude just takes care himself.

    • @Dmdm_dm
      @Dmdm_dm Před 5 lety +1254

      @@Smurffitness Having a sixpack and virtually no fat on your body in your 40s is an amazing achievement. I bet you that only 1% of people in their 40s have a body like that.

    • @davecolvin7969
      @davecolvin7969 Před 5 lety +87

      Or maybe you're just a mess

    • @Dmdm_dm
      @Dmdm_dm Před 5 lety +427

      @@davecolvin7969 I bet Jordan's way fitter than you

  • @sntsk
    @sntsk Před 3 lety +11

    4:48 You studied humans on our planet for a while. LOL

  • @midwestpuertorican6637
    @midwestpuertorican6637 Před 4 měsíci +2

    Ten years later and I’m still watching this. Huge Conan fan.!

  • @mattschumacher4581
    @mattschumacher4581 Před 7 lety +274

    HAHAHAHAHA I just looked at the Jordan's Wikipedia page and it says that he performs "various tasks" for Conan😂

  • @freddiesharpe6297
    @freddiesharpe6297 Před 7 lety +278

    every month or so i go on a Jordan Schlansky binge

  • @vam2317
    @vam2317 Před rokem +19

    It's just plain crazy how we're coming back to this on the regular.

    • @Alex_1729
      @Alex_1729 Před rokem +1

      Well it's where it all started, this Schlansky series

    • @vam2317
      @vam2317 Před rokem

      @@Alex_1729 There are much older ones as well. but, this is just timeless ;) pun intended

  • @MCO18
    @MCO18 Před 3 měsíci +3

    “I’ve been experimenting with oats and whey” lmao

  • @jetjazz05
    @jetjazz05 Před 5 lety +1633

    I don't know if Jordan is an actual person or a character... but he's great.

    • @Smurffitness
      @Smurffitness Před 5 lety +97

      mix

    • @kakokapolei123
      @kakokapolei123 Před 5 lety +310

      I believe it's just an exaggerated version of himself

    • @kakokapolei123
      @kakokapolei123 Před 5 lety +73

      mhm izme I think he said so in a Reddit AMA
      Edit: I'll copy an paste the question and his response here:
      "Is your on-air personality similar to your actual personality? If so, don't you realize how you come off, and that the reason we think you're hilarious is not because of your culinary / fasion / etc. bravado?"
      "Yes to both. -JS"

    • @alizivani6274
      @alizivani6274 Před 5 lety +13

      @mhm izme Jesus Christ, why do you keep replying to each comment. These comments are all from months ago.

    • @rvk4b3
      @rvk4b3 Před 5 lety +5

      @mhm izme shhh

  • @chriswood9385
    @chriswood9385 Před 4 lety +360

    dude this feels like an episode from the office

    • @TristenHernandez
      @TristenHernandez Před 4 lety +9

      Please make this a reality show! Snippets aren’t enough.

  • @br0d1zzle_11
    @br0d1zzle_11 Před 10 měsíci +3

    Conan and Jordan is my internal dialogue everyday. I love this video. I could watch a thousand episodes of these two interacting

  • @somesshbahuguna9620
    @somesshbahuguna9620 Před rokem +5

    Was feeling bit down today. Thanks CZcams for suggesting Conan, my all time favourite! ❤️ From India.

  • @hasanrahman5128
    @hasanrahman5128 Před 8 lety +800

    i was just binge watching conan's videos and realised that it can be made into tv sitcom and it would be a hit

  • @albboy96
    @albboy96 Před 9 lety +647

    its probably the 10th time ive watched this and its still funny as hell

    • @DooMylicious
      @DooMylicious Před 9 lety +25

      same here, I always find myself returning to these videos

    • @TstormVA2012
      @TstormVA2012 Před 9 lety +16

      This is my first..and I'm dying. Just dying!!!

    • @seattlegirl33
      @seattlegirl33 Před 9 lety +23

      Anytime I'm in a shitty mood I watch this....never gets old!

    • @chembiz
      @chembiz Před 9 lety +58

      I watch this whenever I'm avoiding cleaning and/or studying.

    • @sergiotaki9
      @sergiotaki9 Před 9 lety +3

      albboy96 right there with you!

  • @mariagalluzzi69
    @mariagalluzzi69 Před 8 měsíci +1

    One of the GREATEST clips of all talk show history! Freaking brilliant

  • @lavendermagic84
    @lavendermagic84 Před 3 lety +74

    4:04 So none of us had any knowledge of what Jordan's "various duties" as associate producer of the show were. But in this moment, a prepared list of Jordan's daily tasks had been sitting right in front of Conan the entire time he was waiting for Schlansky to arrive, and he let it go unnoticed. For shame, Conan.

    • @the_j_machine2254
      @the_j_machine2254 Před 3 lety +4

      I would like to know what his tasks were too.

    • @scottw6704
      @scottw6704 Před 4 měsíci

      It may have been somewhat obliterated when the lotion got squirted on it

  • @phothewin6019
    @phothewin6019 Před 7 lety +1762

    I'm supposed to be studying for a midterm right now but I can't stop watching Conan vids lol.

  • @NishantGogna
    @NishantGogna Před 7 lety +902

    jordan is the unsung hero of the internet

  • @vannbass
    @vannbass Před 2 měsíci

    These were the best ! Loved to watch

  • @hotpotato265
    @hotpotato265 Před rokem +3

    8:29 "Jordan Schlansky one cranky fake Italian" XD