The boy with few pleasures, whose mother is concerned about weight gain, might benefit from having a dog, which needs walking. It helps to provide regular exercise. Walking uses energy and may act as a soothing stimulation. If you know someone who has a friendly dog, it might be worth trying to see if it would help him, by walking the dog for a week. A calm friendly dog can be be very relaxing and a very loyal friend.
I'm 71, and self-identified. I definitely feel MUCH calmer and a lot less anxiety. But I also feel it's a bit harder to get out socially. Interesting answer he had.
I am a mother of 2 children diagnosed with a mild form of asperger sindrome, a dauther of an asperger ingenier, and I have a brother with asperger sindrome and BPD, with all the strugle, but also the open comunication, and the growth, and profundity of all this, I allways felt I had something like them but when I applied the AQ or the SQ and EQ of doctor Simon Baron Cohen It didn´t fit me, I had a very hi Empathy Quotient and low in Sistematization, because I don´t really about in machines, trains, harware in general, but when I first watch the videos that you have posted, about woman It all came clear, I am very thankfull to what you are doing, thank yoy Dr Tony and thank you autismhangout(dotcom) that´s my history including than I am a psicologist, obssesed with understanding and helping others thank you again. (english is not my first language I hope I am being clear)
Great suggestion, Robert Tornay. I can't place live links in the video so I've copied them into the write up. You can find them there. Good luck! Craig
I have recently been diagnosed with ASD 1/HFA at age 59. Another reason for cutting or self harm may also proof of being alive. I was misdiagnosed with schizoaffective D/O years ago, and was placed on massive doses of antipsychotics, mood stabilizers, and SSRIs. At times, I wasn't sure if I was alive. Cutting myself until I bled proved to me that I was still alive as dead people don't bleed. No doctor ever asked me why I cut myself, just changed my diagnosis to include borderline personality (due to self harm).
Way back in the 80s I fell in with the wrong crowd. Managed to graduate college but made a whole lot of terrible mistakes because of being with that crowd. The one good thing was the establishment of befriending the elderly.
Thank you for posting this video! I've scored above thresholds on several ASD tests, so this information helps me understand that my challenges are part of who I am.
I have a suggestion that may help with group projects. Depending on what one is willing to do, You could just assume the role of the team/group leader or ask if you can take the lead. And then you can ask what does everyone want to do on the project? Then suggest they take those parts. Ask if you can set an early due date, preferably not the teacher's due date, but a date set a day or 2 before it's do so you all can review it together or practice your presentaion , if you ll present it. Then ask to exchange numbers, if you're comfortable and call eachother if/when you need help. Practicing good communication skills works. And in this situation you can use the controlling aspect as a strength for you and the group. Worked for me😊
I really related to the part of this video about asking how you are feeling and being asked to respond to that. For me it's like this..how can I be expected to describe what I am feeling with the words that are available to use. It's way too complicated and I try words out in my head but they don't match. The only thing that matches is like he says..a story or a poem or a picture or a song. Language is just too limiting. My partner asked what it feels like when my infodump gets cut off or ignored. I had to say " I would guess it's like the feeling you would get if you were riding a bus or a train that dropped you off three stops before your destination and you had to walk the rest of the way..oh..and it's also raining very hard. It feels like that.
Pain..interesting, there is a tenuous link to fibromyalgia, no surprise due to the stress markers. I have both autism and fibro. Fatigue is the biggest factor then the pain sets in.
Just a suggestion from an Aspie: It would be very helpful, if the links mentioned in the video, would be either clickable or could be copied . Reading it and then typing it in is very difficult for me , and I bet I'm not alone with this. Would be nice if the ASD materials would have ASD friendly format.
I was very concerned, when they talked about hurting animals as part of the Asperger's test? Why do they think that people with Asperger's would hurt animals? As children, my brother and sister both tortured and killed small animals - my pets, but not their own . My sister liked to kill animals in front of me in adulthood, because she knew it upset me. She would shoot and wound squirrels or catch mice and leave them caught in the trap with a broken leg, so that I could hear them scream. Does this mean my siblings have Asperger's? My brother and sister also physically, emotionally and sexually abused me. My mother actively encouraged this abuse. Should I be recommending that they get diagnosed?
There is no evidence that someone with autism would do what your siblings did to you. Therefore, there is no need to have them diagnosed. The fact that your mother condoned such abhorrent behavior is probably more contributing. I'm sorry you were abused in this manner. Have you talked with professionals about these events? If not, you should. They were horrible.
@@craigevans4010Thank you for your reply. Why did it say the autism test asked about hurting animals, then? It upsets me terribly, when someone kills something. A cat ran under my car and died and I was devastated for ages. I couldn't stop crying. I am a Vegan, because I can't bear animal cruelty as well as for environmental and socio-economic reasons. I have never discussed the extent of my abuse with anybody. Clinicians have labelled me delusional, as though these sort of things don't happen. Abusers work by normalising abuse: I was hyperlexic as a child and my mum used to put adult books on my shelf, that suggested sexual abuse was normal. Abusers always threaten dire consequences for talking and my mum told me never to tell about what happened at home. Clinicians have just made it worse, by either blaming me for what happened or thinking that I should be over it. Mum always said that physical, emotional and sexual abuse was because I was a bad person and had to be punished. My mum pretended to be a Christian and told me that I had to forgive everyone who abused me, no matter what they did. I try to be forgiving, but it is very hard. I speak up, when other people are being abused, but no one ever speaks up for me. I think my Dad had Asperger's and he was a lovely, caring Dad, but I never even told him. My family told me lies about him, to make him think he would be angry with me, if I told him. I remember him helping me to ride my bike, because I was late learning to ride without stabilisers. He was a social worker, who always helped people and I wanted to be like him.
@@scorpiotech123 As you know, generalizing about autism doesn't work. Each is different. In my experience, most spectrum people I meet are like you... sensitive and caring. But not all, although rather than being cruel like your sibling, most of the others are just benign. From what you're telling me, it sounds as if your mother was your worst abuser. Your wanting to be more like your father is a very good choice. I'm sorry the clinical/psychological help system has let you down. Do try to be yourself... it appears you've already patterned yourself after your father. Kindness is strength. Also, be kind to yourself.
@@craigevans4010 Thank you for your reply. Do you think there are therapies, that might help Aspie children, who have been abused this way? Could you ask Dr Tony in a future session? I know it is too late for me, but I would like to think that other little girls and boys with Asperger's could be helped in the future and if there was a working party on this subject, I would willingly contribute.
@@scorpiotech123 Thank you for offering to contribute. You bring up an important subject, one that's too commonly experienced by people on the spectrum: Abuse. We have not filmed an Ask Dr. Tony session for an extended period of time. If we do another, I will include your issue. Best wishes to you.
for diagnostic places possibly looking carefully at main autism related google results carefully can help ... i though in Czechia it is difficult to find anything and then i found autismport.cz . Wooow :) it even has interactive map with support places including details like if they are for kids, teens, adults etc ... what type of services they provide and the detailed contacts :)
The boy with few pleasures, whose mother is concerned about weight gain, might benefit from having a dog, which needs walking. It helps to provide regular exercise. Walking uses energy and may act as a soothing stimulation. If you know someone who has a friendly dog, it might be worth trying to see if it would help him, by walking the dog for a week. A calm friendly dog can be be very relaxing and a very loyal friend.
I'm 71, and self-identified. I definitely feel MUCH calmer and a lot less anxiety. But I also feel it's a bit harder to get out socially. Interesting answer he had.
I am a mother of 2 children diagnosed with a mild form of asperger sindrome, a dauther of an asperger ingenier, and I have a brother with asperger sindrome and BPD, with all the strugle, but also the open comunication, and the growth, and profundity of all this, I allways felt I had something like them but when I applied the AQ or the SQ and EQ of doctor Simon Baron Cohen It didn´t fit me, I had a very hi Empathy Quotient and low in Sistematization, because I don´t really about in machines, trains, harware in general, but when I first watch the videos that you have posted, about woman It all came clear, I am very thankfull to what you are doing, thank yoy Dr Tony and thank you autismhangout(dotcom) that´s my history including than I am a psicologist, obssesed with understanding and helping others thank you again. (english is not my first language I hope I am being clear)
Great suggestion, Robert Tornay. I can't place live links in the video so I've copied them into the write up. You can find them there. Good luck! Craig
Thanks a lot, much better. :-)
I have recently been diagnosed with ASD 1/HFA at age 59. Another reason for cutting or self harm may also proof of being alive. I was misdiagnosed with schizoaffective D/O years ago, and was placed on massive doses of antipsychotics, mood stabilizers, and SSRIs. At times, I wasn't sure if I was alive. Cutting myself until I bled proved to me that I was still alive as dead people don't bleed. No doctor ever asked me why I cut myself, just changed my diagnosis to include borderline personality (due to self harm).
Way back in the 80s I fell in with the wrong crowd. Managed to graduate college but made a whole lot of terrible mistakes because of being with that crowd. The one good thing was the establishment of befriending the elderly.
Lovely! Those friendships are gifts that keep on giving! Well done!
Thank you for posting this video! I've scored above thresholds on several ASD tests, so this information helps me understand that my challenges are part of who I am.
I have a suggestion that may help with group projects.
Depending on what one is willing to do, You could just assume the role of the team/group leader or ask if you can take the lead. And then you can ask what does everyone want to do on the project? Then suggest they take those parts. Ask if you can set an early due date, preferably not the teacher's due date, but a date set a day or 2 before it's do so you all can review it together or practice your presentaion , if you ll present it. Then ask to exchange numbers, if you're comfortable and call eachother if/when you need help.
Practicing good communication skills works. And in this situation you can use the controlling aspect as a strength for you and the group.
Worked for me😊
Immensely helpful content, thanks! However, perhaps more care could be given to lighting. The lights behind Dr Tony feel like daggers in my eyes.
I really related to the part of this video about asking how you are feeling and being asked to respond to that. For me it's like this..how can I be expected to describe what I am feeling with the words that are available to use. It's way too complicated and I try words out in my head but they don't match. The only thing that matches is like he says..a story or a poem or a picture or a song. Language is just too limiting. My partner asked what it feels like when my infodump gets cut off or ignored. I had to say " I would guess it's like the feeling you would get if you were riding a bus or a train that dropped you off three stops before your destination and you had to walk the rest of the way..oh..and it's also raining very hard. It feels like that.
Thank you for this (and all the other) video(s)!
Pain..interesting, there is a tenuous link to fibromyalgia, no surprise due to the stress markers. I have both autism and fibro. Fatigue is the biggest factor then the pain sets in.
Just a suggestion from an Aspie: It would be very helpful, if the links mentioned in the video, would be either clickable or could be copied . Reading it and then typing it in is very difficult for me , and I bet I'm not alone with this. Would be nice if the ASD materials would have ASD friendly format.
:-)
There's Asd and lazy...you be lazy
So helpful. Thankyou
very helpful, as always.
I was very concerned, when they talked about hurting animals as part of the Asperger's test? Why do they think that people with Asperger's would hurt animals? As children, my brother and sister both tortured and killed small animals - my pets, but not their own . My sister liked to kill animals in front of me in adulthood, because she knew it upset me. She would shoot and wound squirrels or catch mice and leave them caught in the trap with a broken leg, so that I could hear them scream. Does this mean my siblings have Asperger's? My brother and sister also physically, emotionally and sexually abused me. My mother actively encouraged this abuse. Should I be recommending that they get diagnosed?
There is no evidence that someone with autism would do what your siblings did to you. Therefore, there is no need to have them diagnosed. The fact that your mother condoned such abhorrent behavior is probably more contributing. I'm sorry you were abused in this manner. Have you talked with professionals about these events? If not, you should. They were horrible.
@@craigevans4010Thank you for your reply. Why did it say the autism test asked about hurting animals, then?
It upsets me terribly, when someone kills something. A cat ran under my car and died and I was devastated for ages. I couldn't stop crying. I am a Vegan, because I can't bear animal cruelty as well as for environmental and socio-economic reasons.
I have never discussed the extent of my abuse with anybody. Clinicians have labelled me delusional, as though these sort of things don't happen. Abusers work by normalising abuse: I was hyperlexic as a child and my mum used to put adult books on my shelf, that suggested sexual abuse was normal. Abusers always threaten dire consequences for talking and my mum told me never to tell about what happened at home. Clinicians have just made it worse, by either blaming me for what happened or thinking that I should be over it. Mum always said that physical, emotional and sexual abuse was because I was a bad person and had to be punished. My mum pretended to be a Christian and told me that I had to forgive everyone who abused me, no matter what they did. I try to be forgiving, but it is very hard. I speak up, when other people are being abused, but no one ever speaks up for me.
I think my Dad had Asperger's and he was a lovely, caring Dad, but I never even told him. My family told me lies about him, to make him think he would be angry with me, if I told him. I remember him helping me to ride my bike, because I was late learning to ride without stabilisers. He was a social worker, who always helped people and I wanted to be like him.
@@scorpiotech123 As you know, generalizing about autism doesn't work. Each is different. In my experience, most spectrum people I meet are like you... sensitive and caring. But not all, although rather than being cruel like your sibling, most of the others are just benign. From what you're telling me, it sounds as if your mother was your worst abuser. Your wanting to be more like your father is a very good choice. I'm sorry the clinical/psychological help system has let you down. Do try to be yourself... it appears you've already patterned yourself after your father. Kindness is strength. Also, be kind to yourself.
@@craigevans4010 Thank you for your reply. Do you think there are therapies, that might help Aspie children, who have been abused this way? Could you ask Dr Tony in a future session? I know it is too late for me, but I would like to think that other little girls and boys with Asperger's could be helped in the future and if there was a working party on this subject, I would willingly contribute.
@@scorpiotech123 Thank you for offering to contribute. You bring up an important subject, one that's too commonly experienced by people on the spectrum: Abuse. We have not filmed an Ask Dr. Tony session for an extended period of time. If we do another, I will include your issue. Best wishes to you.
❤️
Where can I submit a question for the next session if there is one
www.autismhangout.com. Look for the question submission form.
for diagnostic places possibly looking carefully at main autism related google results carefully can help ... i though in Czechia it is difficult to find anything and then i found autismport.cz . Wooow :) it even has interactive map with support places including details like if they are for kids, teens, adults etc ... what type of services they provide and the detailed contacts :)
hello Craig!I sent you some private messages on facebook.hope you got them! -carlos