7 Tips from THE ADDAMS FAMILY to Keep Your Marriage Alive

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  • čas přidán 25. 10. 2021
  • Morticia and Gomez might be obsessed with death, but they keep their romance very much alive!
    Licensed therapist Jonathan Decker and filmmaker Alan Seawright explain how Morticia and Gomez's relationship in the 1990's Barry Sonnenfeld version of The Addams Family illustrates the principles from John Gottman's Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. They talk about the commitment and priority they place on their relationship, the brilliant comedy and acting from Raul Julia and Anjelica Huston, and what we can learn from all of it.
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    Written by: Megan Seawright, Jonathan Decker and Alan Seawright
    Produced by: Jonathan Decker, Megan Seawright & Alan Seawright
    Edited by: David Sant
    Director of Photography: Bradley Olsen
    English Transcription by: Anna Preis
  • Krátké a kreslené filmy

Komentáře • 4,1K

  • @deeya
    @deeya Před 2 lety +9688

    "How long has it been since we waltzed?"
    "Oh, Gomez...hours."
    That's love.

    • @tealablu3759
      @tealablu3759 Před 2 lety +263

      Honestly! And both sound so genuine

    • @louera
      @louera Před 2 lety +234

      One of my preferences in a partner is knowing how to dance and enjoying it. It's just a nice activity to do together, not only for health, but also because it's a big turn on as well haha. Also, I think dancing is all about just enjoying being in your body, being in the present with your partner, laughing off mistakes together, and being carefree/not caring about how others could perceive the way you dance.

    • @doloreslehmann8628
      @doloreslehmann8628 Před 2 lety +82

      Always loved this scene. My husband and I got together as a dancing couple, so it resonates.

    • @itsjustlarkspur1750
      @itsjustlarkspur1750 Před 2 lety +26

      i just read "waltzed" as "walt-zed" goodbye.

    • @preciousypenguino
      @preciousypenguino Před 2 lety +18

      I say that line almost weekly just to myself bc I don't have a Gomez! 😆

  • @aeh5109
    @aeh5109 Před 2 lety +4980

    My favorite line is: "Don't torture yourself Gomez, that's my job"

  • @littleblackcar
    @littleblackcar Před rokem +5746

    The Addams family: Happily-married, faithful parents; parents who support their children's interests; intergenerational household without resentment; treats employees like family; happy extended family; kids who play together (more or less) constructively . . . I think this might literally be the most functional fictional family I've ever seen in a movie.

    • @deathwish-fs1ib
      @deathwish-fs1ib Před rokem +634

      Don't forget that they're ridiculously rich but never flaunt their wealth outside of using it to help others and are instantly accepting of pretty much everyone, despite how strange they find 'normal' people. Everyone could stand to be more like the Addams Family.

    • @JazzyWaffles
      @JazzyWaffles Před rokem +365

      @@deathwish-fs1ib In the old TV show, their taxes get lowered so Gomez runs for office to raise his own taxes! The Addams are very based.

    • @blackangel163
      @blackangel163 Před rokem +12

      In second place is the Simpsons.

    • @DragonKnightJin
      @DragonKnightJin Před rokem +146

      @@JazzyWaffles Having never seen the old tv show or read the comics... That sounds like an INCREDIBLY Gomez thing to do.
      "What? Lower taxes? Not if I have anything to say about that!" *Runs for office to fix that shit*

    • @FEARNOTBlue3778
      @FEARNOTBlue3778 Před rokem +56

      and Wednesday completely ruined that

  • @ngmeylan
    @ngmeylan Před rokem +4854

    I also really like how, when the family is kicked out of their home and Gomez becomes completely depressed, Morticia is not disappointed in him that he is momentarily unable to care for his family, instead she tries to take on a job and give him some space and when things don't improve, she doesn't expect Gomez to 'man up' and get the house back, she tries to plea with Fester herself

    • @yvonnethompson844
      @yvonnethompson844 Před rokem +263

      i'm with her on the colors in the house though, seriously, Pastelles hurt.

    • @Chefgrlangel
      @Chefgrlangel Před rokem +167

      @@yvonnethompson844 it was the execution of said pastels. Debbie used baby pink for evil and that’s ok but the bar scene, the anniversary gift/bomb… ugh it’s the wasted potential for me. She could’ve been an iconic Aadams but she just missed the mark by not being about the family, for shame…
      SHAME!!!

    • @yvonnethompson844
      @yvonnethompson844 Před rokem +72

      The line, specifically states pastelles. And the set looked horrendous. Morticia says she can look past the treachery, and manipulation, and even ripping Fester away.

    • @KennieDoll
      @KennieDoll Před rokem +75

      @@yvonnethompson844 From what I’ve learned painting with pastels costs less so Morticia was actually more so calling her cheap and tacky😭😭

    • @yvonnethompson844
      @yvonnethompson844 Před rokem +28

      @@KennieDoll hmmm... i think it depends on the paint quality, not color. or brands, maybe, because vanta black is definitively out of this artist's pricing, and the types vary in price as well, as if it's synthetic color, or, from natural dies.... 🤔 interior paints are generally latex based any more

  • @AliAngelpie
    @AliAngelpie Před 2 lety +6592

    I love the Addams Family because they're creepy and they're kooky, but they're not toxic. They love each other

    • @Valdagast
      @Valdagast Před 2 lety +234

      This is what Edward's and Bella's relationship should have been.

    • @tiananesbitt7156
      @tiananesbitt7156 Před 2 lety +60

      They performed so well together!

    • @AliAngelpie
      @AliAngelpie Před 2 lety +26

      @@Valdagast Agreed

    • @user-zh4vo1kw1z
      @user-zh4vo1kw1z Před 2 lety +131

      @@tiananesbitt7156 this movie was lightning in a bottle, especially when it came to casting. Each actor was almost designed from the atom up to play these itterations of these characters.

    • @Nicamon
      @Nicamon Před 2 lety +17

      @@AliAngelpie (Meanwhile Wedensday and Pugsley try to kill each other.🖤🖤)

  • @pigpjs
    @pigpjs Před 2 lety +9886

    I love how when the family is evicted and Gomez is depressed, Morticia seeks a job. She doesn't resent her husband. She knows he is struggling and will do what she needs to support the family and give her husband time to process.

    • @alwayslookingup70
      @alwayslookingup70 Před 2 lety +966

      I also love before she goes to confront fester she looks at everyone in her family, how much she loves them and she’s like nope this won’t do and she starts walking to handle it soooo ethereally. I just love the adams movies so much lol

    • @janaterbio8010
      @janaterbio8010 Před 2 lety +863

      I also love that one scene in particular, when getting the job at a kindergarten, which honestly is so wholesome and shows how motherly and nurturing at heart Morticia is, she and the director talked about their husbands. Rather than following the director with saying how much of a bum their marriage partner is, Morticia just swoons and expresses her adoration for Gomez despite being a bum/daydreamer. Even in a time when he is miserable, she still loves him, their family very much. I like it so much, just goes to show how strong their bond with each other is

    • @alwayslookingup70
      @alwayslookingup70 Před 2 lety +486

      @@janaterbio8010 it really is, i never really noticed how much of the tv shows or movies joke about marriage being miserable and hating their spouse etc. The addams family was so refreshing to go way the other way with it.

    • @TheGrifhinx
      @TheGrifhinx Před 2 lety +118

      Without which we would have never been gifted an iconic scene like the daycare storytime

    • @6rebelangel
      @6rebelangel Před 2 lety +210

      @@alwayslookingup70 It's actually hard not to notice that in media now. It's honestly really exhausting, like Family Guy and sometimes the Simpsons. FG started out with Lois and Peter being quirky and weird together but they loved each other and liked their odd antics- which was nice. But now they almost only tolerate each other and are so unhealthy now that it's vey cumbersome to watch. I don't mind unconventional lifestyles, but I honestly miss watching healthy marriages and family relationships. We already have enough of toxic relationships in real life, we don't need to see more of it on tv :/

  • @markusallen6818
    @markusallen6818 Před rokem +3036

    One small detail I like is how when the grandma is suggesting what might be troubling gomez and suggests "adultery?" Morticia responds "oh, no" the way she says it she knows that definitely isn't it she knows their relationship is too solid for that to even be a possibility

    • @btsarmyforever3816
      @btsarmyforever3816 Před rokem +256

      I agree. You can tell by the way your spouse treats you if they love you are not. And it's not by buying stuff for you, but rather doing things for you, being there for you, prioritizing the family. Just a quick call away etc. It would be a GREAT GIFT to have a relationship like Morticia and Gomez.

    • @sarahpersson5662
      @sarahpersson5662 Před rokem +168

      Ya she just answers and moves on. There’s no freak out or panic just matter of fact

    • @pecevearancemolale5584
      @pecevearancemolale5584 Před 9 měsíci +16

      She put him under a love spell 😭

    • @georgewilliamsiii4677
      @georgewilliamsiii4677 Před 7 měsíci +11

      ​@pecevearancemolale5584 They both used love spells.. from grandma so they were a Lil effed up. But now they just love each other to.. well.. death lol

    • @roguejester4986
      @roguejester4986 Před 7 měsíci +7

      Plus why would he? Morticia is a goldmine of delight.

  • @bowdencable7094
    @bowdencable7094 Před rokem +741

    Morticia fully communicates, she just does it in French, which he understands. She says, The sun, "he pierces me like a dagger," and Gomez accepts the duel.

    • @sabrina-wq4uu
      @sabrina-wq4uu Před 10 měsíci +82

      He becomes her champion to slay all of her enemies for her.

    • @fernandocabette6050
      @fernandocabette6050 Před 3 měsíci +15

      @@sabrina-wq4uu Including, but not limited to taking on the sun it self for her.

    • @erenjaeger0794
      @erenjaeger0794 Před 2 dny

      Bro picked a fight with a god 💀💀💀

  • @kendahlgrant8208
    @kendahlgrant8208 Před 2 lety +24656

    Fun Fact: the Addams Family was designed to be the exact opposite of a normal family. The reason they are a happy couple is because the author thought normal families were not happy.

  • @m.h.7364
    @m.h.7364 Před 2 lety +18138

    Gomez isn't "en guarding" the blinds, he says "En garde Monsieur Soleil".... He's directly challenging *the Sun*

    • @inoli3164
      @inoli3164 Před 2 lety +1153

      challenging the sun makes me think of Dark Souls 😂

    • @katiearbuckle9017
      @katiearbuckle9017 Před 2 lety +1290

      Morticia's need makes sense though. If you wake up and the Sun is rising through whatever curtain you have. And it rudely wakes you from a Good Dream or even minimal sleep. It doesn't help your mood at all. And if it's Before you had your coffee...forget it.

    • @MagpieRat
      @MagpieRat Před 2 lety +1742

      Ladies, get you a man who'll duel the sun for you.

    • @maem7462
      @maem7462 Před 2 lety +735

      I love that. He’s like I’ll fight the sun for my wife

    • @sonorasgirl
      @sonorasgirl Před 2 lety +316

      @@MagpieRat 😂😂😂 definitely relationship goals

  • @marahbaker8615
    @marahbaker8615 Před rokem +3424

    In my marriage, I'm definitely the Gomez. Even after 14 years, I hit on my husband constantly and he acts like he thinks I'm being ridiculous but I can tell by his little smile that he secretly loves it. My husband is a very handsome man, but he was a chubby kid most of his young life and I think he has a hard time with still seeing the chubby kid when he looks in the mirror so I always want to build him up and make him feel good about himself. I literally bought a letter board to set by his desk so I can always leave him a cheesy pick up line (currently it says "If you were a flower, you'd be a dammmndelion" lol). I just enjoy making him smile and making it where he'll never feel unloved.

    • @CinemaTherapyShow
      @CinemaTherapyShow  Před rokem +632

      Aww, sweet story. Thanks for sharing! 😊

    • @msk-qp6fn
      @msk-qp6fn Před rokem +277

      AWWWW THIS IS SO SWEET YOU ARE GOAL MATERIAL 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥰🥰🥰🥰

    • @acelovesdiyschristopher7023
      @acelovesdiyschristopher7023 Před rokem +5

      Here's a pick up line if u haven't used it yet: are u homework coz I'm gonna slam u on the table and do u all night long. Enjoy, u 2 are literally goals.👑👑

    • @spb8039
      @spb8039 Před rokem +175

      If you didn't already know it, you're a really good wife!

    • @insanelittlesilk
      @insanelittlesilk Před rokem +216

      Lol! I’m a librarian so I tell my husband, “Are you an overdue book cause you are fiiiiiiine!” Not my best joke but he always laughs.

  • @josealmeida2842
    @josealmeida2842 Před 2 lety +2010

    One of my favorite moments from the classic series is when Gomez spends about five minutes on the show trying to figure out how Houdini got out of a straight jacket. But the minute Morticia said something in French, Gomez was out of that straight jacket in less than ten seconds! 😂

    • @Baldwin-iv445
      @Baldwin-iv445 Před rokem +154

      I think I remember that scene and my Dad bursting out laughing while I was confused because, well, I was ten.

    • @Y2KFroggyAngel
      @Y2KFroggyAngel Před 7 měsíci +13

      I want to see that so bad 💀🥺

  • @abbywolffe4114
    @abbywolffe4114 Před 2 lety +9530

    Okay but "I would die for her; I would kill for her; either way, what bliss" is such a feral and romantic line and I love it

    • @themurdernerd
      @themurdernerd Před rokem +768

      Her lines, "Last night you were unhinged, you were like some desperate, howling demon! You frightened me. Do it again." Sexiest. Lines. Ever.

    • @LadyYurikoLP
      @LadyYurikoLP Před rokem +511

      In German this line was translated to this: "I would die for her; I would kill for her; just wondering what do I do first." Really awesome.

    • @LaBrew
      @LaBrew Před rokem +17

      Agree!

    • @saturnmercury8533
      @saturnmercury8533 Před rokem +42

      @@LadyYurikoLP Oh god... Your profile, it frightened me.

    • @marahbaker8615
      @marahbaker8615 Před rokem

      @@saturnmercury8533 do it again

  • @AngelaRichter65
    @AngelaRichter65 Před 2 lety +5181

    When my husband and I were dating he asked me what I wanted in marriage and I said "Gomez and Morticia Addams". I didn't even hesitate and yes, he gave that to me. Over 20 years and we're still going strong.

  • @sanityisboring.
    @sanityisboring. Před rokem +859

    I love Gomez’s portrayal as a caring and involved father who laughs at toxic masculinity’s face, especially because my dad is a very big, manly, bloke. He likes surfing and rugby and sports and barbecues and all that shit which is considered “masculine” and he’s a big, tall guy to. But he also has to daughters and was never above being there for us princesses, fairies makeovers and all (we were very girly when we were little) even for the icky puberty talks and the teenagers waterworks. It must’ve been a little lonely at times being the only dude in the household but he never hesitated to take that extra step.

    • @irimac1806
      @irimac1806 Před 10 měsíci +16

      Ty for sharing that. it helps keeping the hope for good people/men out there up :)

    • @phastinemoon
      @phastinemoon Před 7 měsíci +6

      Real men wear pink!

    • @brunosantos3245
      @brunosantos3245 Před 8 dny

      Theres no toxic masculinity. just men who are too weak to be a man. An no real woman want a weak man.

  • @WellWoopdidoo
    @WellWoopdidoo Před 2 lety +3318

    One of my favourite throw-away lines from the second film was when Debbie meets Gomez.
    “Well, aren’t you the ladykiller!”
    “Acquitted, actually!”

    • @crazyjason9838
      @crazyjason9838 Před rokem +399

      "I'll play the victim!"
      "All your life"

    • @MasterSandman
      @MasterSandman Před rokem +60

      @WildFireWoo
      And the proud look on his face while saying it! 😂

    • @danielmikhalchuk3490
      @danielmikhalchuk3490 Před rokem +127

      “I didn’t hate my mother, it was an accident!”

    • @LadyAstarionAncunin
      @LadyAstarionAncunin Před rokem +14

      He doesn't say "actually." I know because I can recite the film by heart. 😅

    • @WellWoopdidoo
      @WellWoopdidoo Před rokem +7

      @@LadyAstarionAncunin Fair enough. Won’t argue.

  • @nhogan84
    @nhogan84 Před 2 lety +8713

    My answer to Alan on the question of "is their obsession with each other unhealthy?" would be: Yes, IF that were the only thing that defined who they were. As Jonathan says, their family as a whole is just as important to them, but Morticia and Gomez both have interests and self OUTSIDE of their marriage (Gomez fences, handles their finances, golfs while Morticia gardens). They have identities of self outside of "Morticia and Gomez" and that's something that's very important to avoiding excess entanglement that is unhealthy.

    • @petrifiedviewer
      @petrifiedviewer Před 2 lety +710

      This is so true. I have a lot of friends who lose a sense of self when they get into a relationship and start defining themselves by their couple status and by how they want to be perceived as a couple rather than just living as a couple and learning to incorporate their new relationship into their lives. Then they end up breaking up and they become so lost as an individual because they spent so long as a "we" instead of as a "me".

    • @deanospimoniful
      @deanospimoniful Před 2 lety +298

      It's unwise to build the entirety of your identity around something that can be taken away from you, even positive things like familial relationships.

    • @canvas_125
      @canvas_125 Před 2 lety +385

      Exactly. The plot in the sequel starts by Gomez helping Morticia have time for herself aside from being a wife and mother so they hire a babysitter.

    • @dayalaver64
      @dayalaver64 Před 2 lety +269

      Mortician also does witchcraft and knitting.

    • @MrsBlack88
      @MrsBlack88 Před 2 lety +15

      YESSS exactly!!!

  • @martijndekok
    @martijndekok Před 2 lety +2829

    I also love that The Addams Family is not a-social. Even though they spend most of their time with each other, they don't isolate themselves.
    They enjoy joining in with and contributing to social events with people with completely different interests and morals then their own. They might find it hard to relate to them, because they have such a different view of life, but they accept them and wish them the best. Very much a "live and let live" mentality. I love that.

    • @Theeight8b
      @Theeight8b Před 2 lety +155

      They even tried and participated in social events of "normies', so props even there. I'd say, for all their oddities and extravaganza they are the very example of a good, adequate and tolerant family.
      Cant' really believe that I said that out loud. -_-

    • @kelsisimpson9843
      @kelsisimpson9843 Před 2 lety +100

      I think for the Adams, though, it’d be more of a “live and let die” mentality ;)

    • @technounionrepresentative4274
      @technounionrepresentative4274 Před 2 lety +53

      i wish more adapted the live and let live mentality lately instead of the live and lets shove this person into a box because they disagree with me mentality

    • @lucyandecember2843
      @lucyandecember2843 Před 2 lety +2

      o.o

    • @Drekromancer
      @Drekromancer Před 2 lety +9

      @@technounionrepresentative4274 Well said.

  • @Neytiri94
    @Neytiri94 Před rokem +1316

    Even after all the romantisised toxic relationships todays TV shoved down our throats, Morticia and Gomez were and always will be marriage goals

    • @ss-on3ll
      @ss-on3ll Před rokem +22

      i'm so tired of those.

    • @throughtheotherside420
      @throughtheotherside420 Před rokem +5

      Goals

    • @s_nappsi
      @s_nappsi Před rokem +8

      Possible toxic to society but not to each other

    • @Okbuddypal
      @Okbuddypal Před 7 měsíci +3

      ​​@@s_nappsiThe contrary actually. Even when Debbie (who is nothing like the Addams Family) came into their lives to pretend to be Wednesday and Pugsley's nanny so she could get Fester's fortune, Morticia was pretty okay with the idea and didn't treat her like some kind of weirdo or outcast that didn't belong. And when she had them hostage and ranted about how she deserved jewels and all this other stuff, Morticia nodded approvingly which meant she agreed and wanted her to be happy, even if she did just threaten to electrocute her and her entire family

  • @sophieamandaleitontoomey9343

    “En garde Monsieur SOLEIL!”
    Honestly get you a man that will fight the fucking sun for you. That’s love.

  • @PrettyBoyKii
    @PrettyBoyKii Před 2 lety +7365

    Even from a young age I never understood why so many dysfunctional and often abusive relationships get so much ideation. Gomez and Morticia have always been my example of what a good relationship is. If I hear one more person say they want a Harley and Joker relationship, I'm giving up on humanity.

    • @tararocksong5085
      @tararocksong5085 Před 2 lety +545

      I would much rather have a Morticia and Gomez romance than anything else.

    • @novakarledge114
      @novakarledge114 Před 2 lety +353

      I don't want to be like Quinn and Joker but maybe Quinn and Ivey...

    • @ahstiasummers5583
      @ahstiasummers5583 Před 2 lety +150

      Families that fight all the time make for good drama. And when peoples' lives are down in the dumps, drama can serve as a distraction from their true issues

    • @aroeenafaith5519
      @aroeenafaith5519 Před 2 lety +14

      But I do want that relationship 🥺/s

    • @Zeagods-CyberShadow
      @Zeagods-CyberShadow Před 2 lety +78

      Morticia and gomez are a good role model

  • @unbakedalaska1301
    @unbakedalaska1301 Před 2 lety +4091

    Gomez and Morticia are genuinely marriage goals

    • @trinaq
      @trinaq Před 2 lety +108

      Exactly, they're still passionately in love, and never lose sight of their love for each other.

    • @NyGeL_Derey
      @NyGeL_Derey Před 2 lety +70

      I also want to raise the dead with my wife

    • @ladyreverie7027
      @ladyreverie7027 Před 2 lety +32

      My husband calls me "Cara Mia" because of this movie! We aren't as goth as Morticia and Gomez but in all other respects our relationship is quite similar 🥰 we've been friends for 10 years and in a relationship for 5 years and we are still passionately in love, still growing in love ❤️🌌

    • @Mugruncher
      @Mugruncher Před 2 lety +16

      And Jonathan and Alan are genuinely friendship goals 🌈 ☀️ 🌻

  • @lindsay3917
    @lindsay3917 Před 2 lety +1860

    4:37 Shared love maps
    7:03 Nurture your fondness and admiration
    9:38 Turn towards each other
    12:33 Letting your partner influence you
    15:35 Solve your solvable problems
    18:29 Overcoming gridlock by seeking outside help
    21:55 Create shared meaning

    • @NN-vb5jm
      @NN-vb5jm Před rokem +22

      Thanks 💗

    • @GoddessLuna23
      @GoddessLuna23 Před rokem +18

      Thank you! Everyone in the comments is going on about their personal shit, and projecting whatever issues they have. Instead of point out what he says and the reason their relationship works!

    • @emilysmith2965
      @emilysmith2965 Před rokem +11

      People deserve to have that outlet if they’re so inclined. It’s part of what makes the channel special and doesn’t merit disparagement.
      It was possible for you to make a compliment without trying to tear someone else down. I’m guessing you didn’t really mean anything by it, other than an expression of personal annoyance, but some people may have found that hurtful.

    • @signat2335
      @signat2335 Před 11 měsíci +5

      This should be pinned! (please reply so I remember this comment)

    • @shrimpdilf
      @shrimpdilf Před 8 měsíci

      Thank you!

  • @artespeck8091
    @artespeck8091 Před rokem +381

    Morticia is so iconic she warps the environment around her to make it look like shes in a 1930s fantasy horror film and honestly i wish i could do that

  • @micaelaonofre311
    @micaelaonofre311 Před 2 lety +5128

    I love how the Addams family is supposed to be the opposite of the nuclear family ideal, and that means that the husband and wife are crazy in love with each other instead of hating each other

    • @Lucy666Fernandez
      @Lucy666Fernandez Před 2 lety +563

      Kind of sad that showing affection and support for each other without shame or irony was and sometimes still is considered abnormal.

    • @caitlin329
      @caitlin329 Před 2 lety +400

      That's not the premise of the Addams family, though. The whole point is that they actually fulfill the ideal in many ways -happy husband and wife, two kids, close to their extended family, nice house etc. They just do it whilst looking spooky and enjoying the macabre.
      I suppose for this particular 90s adaptation it had more that effect, but that's more just a sad reflection of where sitcoms as a genre had had to get to by that point. The 'nuclear family' ideal was actually pretty dead by the 90s.

    • @giboi03
      @giboi03 Před 2 lety +286

      @@caitlin329 I'd say the Addams family was challenging/subverting the "perfect family" ideals. Like, they may be spooky, they may be standout, they may be extremely kinky and gore-y in public--but they have the healthiest relationship dynamics out of all the families in their neighborhood, who have to remain perfect, one-note, and quiet about their problems for the sake of following status quo.

    • @caitlin329
      @caitlin329 Před 2 lety +110

      @@giboi03 It was originally a comic based on the joke of a seemingly 'weird' family actually being really nice and 'normal'.
      I think that the 90s films definitely started to go more in the direction you're describing, but it still doesn't quite fit. They do fulfill most ideals, just in their own way, and that's where the comedy comes from.
      The sequel maybe goes more into it? But then one could argue that's more about specifically challenging white suburban American culture as a whole, more than it is specifically about the family aspects.

    • @giboi03
      @giboi03 Před 2 lety +27

      @@caitlin329 Yeah, suburban's what I was thinking. I just wasn't sure whether to use that word specifically or not, since it's been too long since I watched videos about it.

  • @totallyoutofit6989
    @totallyoutofit6989 Před 2 lety +3751

    "don't torture yourself, Gomez. That's my job" - Morticia
    Seriously though, their passion for each other and their love and devotion to each other and their children is amazing, which is why I love these movies

    • @banxeescreems3337
      @banxeescreems3337 Před 2 lety +33

      I love that line 🖤 so many good ones.

    • @charlieflight6124
      @charlieflight6124 Před rokem +28

      @@WhitneyDahlin the problem is finding them. People say 'there's plenty of fish in the sea' but the problem with the abundance of fish is that you will have almost no chance to find the one you want.

    • @Oturan20
      @Oturan20 Před rokem +15

      @@charlieflight6124 Of finding the one you want... and wants you.

    • @charlieflight6124
      @charlieflight6124 Před rokem +6

      @@Oturan20 Oh yes, of course!

  • @simonscowled9925
    @simonscowled9925 Před rokem +387

    Jokes aside: Gomez and morticia respect each other, support each other and still flirt and romance each other after x years and 3 kids. Relationship goals

  • @JakeSweeper
    @JakeSweeper Před 2 lety +196

    I knew a girl who loved Romeo & Juliet as the ultimate love story. I disagreed and said "If you want a romantic relationship based on a fictional couple, go with Gomez and Morticia Addams, not a pair of dumb teenagers who suicide by misunderstanding."

  • @Xehanort10
    @Xehanort10 Před 2 lety +4444

    One of the funniest parts of Addams Family Values is when Morticia says to Debbie "You have placed Fester under some sexual spell. I respect that. But really Debbie? Pastels?"

  • @nekomitaina
    @nekomitaina Před 2 lety +4621

    Morticia also an embodiment of self-esteem and self-acceptance. I don't see her taking BS from anyone, or other way round diminishing others. Real role model in that regard!

    • @PlanetLovingMom
      @PlanetLovingMom Před 2 lety +325

      My favorite part of the movie to give an example of that, is when they talk to Flora and Fauna at the party. Morticia knows Gomez and one of the twins dated, yet she regards them as "twice the woman" she is. "How could I ever compete with you?" She says to them.
      THAT is classy and mature. It's *chef's kiss* perfection.

    • @bigclitenergy
      @bigclitenergy Před 2 lety +107

      @@PlanetLovingMom I know! it just shows how self secure she is and honestly I love that

    • @irishdc9523
      @irishdc9523 Před 2 lety +127

      She does know her limits for tolerance as well, since she says she could forgive Debbie for stealing Fester from the family and destroying his spirit, but..."Pastels?"

    • @lunaselena4270
      @lunaselena4270 Před 2 lety +36

      when she sadly says "not anymore." to "he is a dreamer, isn't he?"

    • @stephaniedesmond8329
      @stephaniedesmond8329 Před 2 lety +78

      She'd probably take the BS silently, with a smile on her face, because it wouldn't affect her life in any way. She'd just leave the BS sitting there, uninterested, and decline to pick it up.

  • @lucieellis3149
    @lucieellis3149 Před 2 lety +298

    The fact that the Addams parents have an obviously passionate sex life and being madly in love is what made them stand out. Normally you get the odd sex joke or a lovely dovey comment but this family just went, ‘Hey couples and parents have sex, sometimes kinky sex but it’s all done consensually by two people in love’.

  • @painoftheheart12
    @painoftheheart12 Před rokem +863

    My girlfriend and I before we even started dating, before we told each other our feelings (before I even realized I had feelings). One of our mutual joked how compatible we were and we were playing into the Morticia and Gomez dynamic and I quoted Gomez to her and I just remember her gasping and saying, "I get to be morticia?" And I was like, "of course!"
    Needless to say I'm marrying her

    • @krisherman3513
      @krisherman3513 Před rokem +66

      Snap her up! When someone gets your references and humor without explanation, that is a major part of a partnership. One major reason my husband and I got married.

    • @jameshowlettii761
      @jameshowlettii761 Před 9 měsíci +5

      What was the quote?

    • @ladyreverie7027
      @ladyreverie7027 Před 8 měsíci

      ​@@krisherman3513this is me and my partner 🥰

    • @SeeItLikeItSub2It
      @SeeItLikeItSub2It Před 7 měsíci

      ❤❤❤

    • @gagarfield2934
      @gagarfield2934 Před 6 měsíci +6

      Wish you two luck! You sound like such a sweet couple :D

  • @macaroni.5032
    @macaroni.5032 Před 2 lety +13017

    let’s also talk about how amazing a parent Morticia is bc when their baby turned into a “normal” baby Morticia reads Cat in the Hat even though it causes her real discomfort. The baby wanted it so she was a good mother and read it to him, love her!!!!

    • @BonaparteBardithion
      @BonaparteBardithion Před 2 lety +2511

      [solemnly reading, turns page]
      "Oh, no. He lives."

    • @shiaras4675
      @shiaras4675 Před 2 lety +2650

      That was, hands down, one of my favorite scenes in the entire Addams franchise. She didn't try to convince him that maybe the book on poisons or whatever would be better, she didn't dye his hair black.
      Sure she was upset and would greatly prefer him to be less cheruby and more goth like the rest of the family, but she doesn't force it.
      Because even if she doesn't like what's happening to him, or what it means for his future, she loves him more. So she sits and reads a book she knows he'll like. And considering the literature at the Addams manor, she probably went out and bought the book fresh from the book store.
      Just topnotch everything in this movie.

    • @lucyandecember2843
      @lucyandecember2843 Před 2 lety +51

      o.o

    • @elfteiroh
      @elfteiroh Před 2 lety +1864

      My favorite part about that baby:
      Rest of family: “Is it a boy or a girl?”
      Gomez: “It’s an Addams!”
      THAT IS PARENTING!

    • @fungusfood8097
      @fungusfood8097 Před 2 lety +952

      @@elfteiroh oh you know they're so affirming to everyone. If one of their kids were to come out as trans it would be zero doubt, just immediate snap to New name, New pronouns, asking what they can do to help, offering to take them to buy new clothes etc and they would burn down a school if a teacher misgendered their baby

  • @1bendykat
    @1bendykat Před 2 lety +5149

    It says a lot about our culture that a healthy family is framed as “strange” or “off” somehow. That it’s framed as comedy when they’re really the healthiest family on TV.

    • @sarroumarbeu6810
      @sarroumarbeu6810 Před 2 lety +181

      Ikr ?? When did messed up abusive families become so normal... That's like ..the essence of so many issues is "normal" and healthy balanced romance is the weird one ??? 👁️👄👁️

    • @kinka9883
      @kinka9883 Před 2 lety +166

      I don't think it's because they have a healthy marriage, I'm pretty sure it's just the fact that they like dark, morbid things. And as far as I've seen everyone loves the Addams family because of their wholesomeness. If they were hateful and actively malicious, I doubt people would like them that much beyond their aesthetic.

    • @1bendykat
      @1bendykat Před 2 lety +86

      @@kinka9883 now they’re viewed as having a healthy relationship but my Mom talks about growing up and how most people viewed them as kookie and entertaining, but not necessarily a “healthy marriage” due to their “occult interests” (she grew up in the rural Midwest)

    • @redrhapsody1415
      @redrhapsody1415 Před 2 lety +89

      I think that they're like this because regular sitcoms were always centered around a wife and husband who hate each other.

    • @exoticsamba492
      @exoticsamba492 Před 2 lety +20

      @@kinka9883 Yeah but that’s the problem. Why portray healthy couples as dark & evil?
      It doesn’t make sense because evil people are abusive. So technically, this image belongs to the abusive toxic relationships from “normal” society.
      This type of healthy couple deserve to be portrayed as normal, kind beings.

  • @procrastinator99
    @procrastinator99 Před 10 měsíci +90

    Something you didn't mention about the therapy scene: I like how, when Gomez doesn't know about "displacement", he turns to- and asks- Morticia about it. He accepts that she may know something he doesn't, and without a second thought turns to her. His masculinity isn't harmed by turning to his wife, he doesn't even think about it. And that's awesome.

  • @ohshanana2397
    @ohshanana2397 Před 10 měsíci +118

    I love they’re relationship so much: they keep the passion alive, respect each other. Love and nurture their children. Have a healthy relationship with other family members around them. And are willing to seek outside advice and help

  • @r.babylon2885
    @r.babylon2885 Před 2 lety +3226

    Morticia's, "Do it again" does so much more for me than modern garbage. That look, that voice, and that subtlety.

    • @francis7336
      @francis7336 Před 2 lety +135

      whenever i see the phrase "do it again" i think of the hyenas from The Lion King

    • @ebindelgado9660
      @ebindelgado9660 Před 2 lety +92

      Patrick: "DO IT AGAIN, I WASN'T LOOKING"

    • @alicepbg2042
      @alicepbg2042 Před 2 lety +54

      "subtlety"?

    • @Firegen1
      @Firegen1 Před 2 lety +8

      @@francis7336 To be honest..... same vibe.

    • @thomaskositzki9424
      @thomaskositzki9424 Před 2 lety +96

      I think they are 100 times much more kinky and sexy than "50 Shades of Grey". ^^

  • @claratalbot7613
    @claratalbot7613 Před 2 lety +10503

    Morticia and Gomez have always been my ideal marriage. It's just a such a wholesome marriage

    • @maryabruxinhaartista4045
      @maryabruxinhaartista4045 Před 2 lety +126

      I have to ask, if it's your ideal marriage, are we counting with the goth part as well?

    • @null6353
      @null6353 Před 2 lety +282

      @@maryabruxinhaartista4045 that's mandatory, to me

    • @AnymMusic
      @AnymMusic Před 2 lety +95

      sooooo are we talking WITH or WITHOUT the killing and attempted murder

    • @claratalbot7613
      @claratalbot7613 Před 2 lety +44

      @@maryabruxinhaartista4045 I am goth so xd

    • @claratalbot7613
      @claratalbot7613 Před 2 lety +82

      @@AnymMusic Without of course but the legal kinky stuff we could do if my future partner was into it

  • @jennaheiser625
    @jennaheiser625 Před 2 lety +957

    16:58
    I think it’s a very small moment, but I always smile when “Dr. Pinderschloss” asks if Gomez has heard of displacement, and he says no and turns to Morticia. “Tish?” He knows that she considers his problems to be hers, and her knowing about displacement when he doesn’t would be both possible and is completely comfortable with him. Honestly, the moment breaks the flow of the scene slightly, and adding it in just serves to hammer home how connected they are in a lovely, subtle way. So great!

    • @christinaclark9754
      @christinaclark9754 Před rokem +66

      I loved that part. I thought it was really cool that his first thought was to ask her about it. Not just assuming that she didn't know either. Also when he sits back down, he instantly reaches for her for comfort.

    • @erikperhs_
      @erikperhs_ Před rokem +55

      By doing that, he admits that maybe she knows more than him about something, which is not very common for men to do.

    • @rebecca_rh
      @rebecca_rh Před rokem +4

      I would like but I don’t want to ruin the 666

    • @jennaheiser625
      @jennaheiser625 Před rokem +6

      @@rebecca_rh Morticia and Gomez would both approve! 😆

    • @rebecca_rh
      @rebecca_rh Před rokem +4

      @@jennaheiser625 yes exactly! Ahah

  • @maiamaola6143
    @maiamaola6143 Před rokem +813

    I don't often see healthy couples in media who just want to be together, without the expectations of sex. Here, I love how Gomez and Morticia could be seen as a couple who doesn't have to equate sex and love to be happy. They adore and respect one another, they have unique interests outside their partner and they are completely honest about boundaries, communication and trust. Yes, they have children and yes they do have a sex life, but I always got the feeling they would be just as happy being together without having sex. They proved as much in the 1960s TV show where sex was implied, but you never even saw them kiss on the lips. The most Gomez ever did was kiss Morticia's arm when she spoke French. I found that infinitely more attractive/erotic than any "sex scene" in the films. As an ace, seeing a healthy marital relationship focused on partnership and trust before and/or not including sex in this movie is both positive and refreshing. I hope one day it can become normalized and that media will change the focus from sex to healthy partnerships.

    • @TaraTara-ld2xb
      @TaraTara-ld2xb Před rokem +4

      Interesting. I find them highly erotic, but also romantic and an example of true love. And yes, Gomez kissing Morticia's arm like that is very sexy!

    • @imanaimokay3390
      @imanaimokay3390 Před rokem +75

      I'm so glad someone mentioned that, I'm ace too and that's exactly how I feel about couples in the media, I'm so tired of everything just being about sex, like you can be romantic and erotic without the act of sex itself and you can build a meaningful relationship without it too. Gomez and Morticia are one of my biggest "inspirations" on the romantic area of life, the mutual respect, trust and love they have for each other is just beautiful to witness.

    • @_50_ducks_
      @_50_ducks_ Před rokem +37

      Yes, my ace brethren! I agree. I get sick of those types of scenes, they are in most movies with romance between characters, I love love, but sex just isn't it lol. That's kinda why I love the 60s one so much, it doesn't cross the lines to be uncomfy to be around, and you can tell that this is a way of them being close and intimate.

    • @idkjkshdjkhdk
      @idkjkshdjkhdk Před rokem +17

      As a fellow ace as well, i agree they seem so cute and loving together they're literally couple goals 💖

    • @redwitch12
      @redwitch12 Před rokem +27

      They're deeply passionate, but that passion extends well outside of sexual matters. They're passionate about *each other*. The innuendoes sure do rain from the sky around them, though :D

  • @mikeyates7931
    @mikeyates7931 Před 2 lety +9883

    It's a small scene , but I love when Gomez is hitting golf balls and Morticia is watching him ; not because he asked her to , not to placate him , but because she genuinely enjoys watching her Man engaging in an activity that he enjoys - in essence , it makes her happy to see him being happy 💕

    • @ahhh4117
      @ahhh4117 Před 2 lety +337

      I mean he's definitely something to admire

    • @tiph3802
      @tiph3802 Před 2 lety +216

      These moments in a relationship are the greatest!

    • @mikeyates7931
      @mikeyates7931 Před 2 lety +55

      @@tiph3802 absolutely 💕

    • @jennifermalcolm6838
      @jennifermalcolm6838 Před rokem +181

      I love watching my partner do something that lights up his eyes and puts a smile on his face. I thought I was a sap but its clearly just what it is to be completely in love and truly caring for the other person!

    • @mikeyates7931
      @mikeyates7931 Před rokem +43

      @@jennifermalcolm6838 you are a Very Beautiful Soul 💖 and your partner is Very Blessed to have You in his life

  • @erikzherrllo6960
    @erikzherrllo6960 Před 2 lety +5663

    Me, a teen with no intention to start a relationship or even marry: “ah yes, the pillars of marriage, must know them!!”

    • @phyrewillow6463
      @phyrewillow6463 Před 2 lety +341

      These are good to know for any relationship. How to care for the ppl in your life.

    • @banjotiki3910
      @banjotiki3910 Před 2 lety +168

      Same 🤣🤣🤣🤣 I've always thought that the idea of me having a boyfriend some day is a joke, but for some reason I absolutely love watching this kind of stuff.

    • @veesancez
      @veesancez Před 2 lety +87

      Gotta learn now so u don't end up suffering throughout ur 20s

    • @banjotiki3910
      @banjotiki3910 Před 2 lety +75

      @@veesancez Well I plan on being single my whole life, so...

    • @g.strobl4458
      @g.strobl4458 Před 2 lety +74

      @@banjotiki3910 , well, if that is what feels right, then stick with that. As long as you give yourself leave to change plans, if you find this does not make you happy, that's perfectly fine. :-)

  • @blakehawk4087
    @blakehawk4087 Před 2 lety +122

    Gomez and Morticia are the best example of secure attachment:
    *They communicate very well when things are going wrong.
    * They don't need to keep tabs on each other, yet know they are trustworthy.
    *They compromise, instead of sacrificing.
    *They are very welcoming of others.

  • @nezuminora9528
    @nezuminora9528 Před rokem +33

    "Tim Burton without the bullshit" is extra funny in light of the Wednesday remake

  • @Channel9001
    @Channel9001 Před 2 lety +6151

    I think one thing you notice about the Addams Family is that they make one important distinction. They seem to enjoy physical pain, and have no qualms about causing bodily harm to one another. But they never cause each other *emotional* pain, they are very loving and supportive of one another, never talk down to or belittle each other. I believe the Addames are very well aware of the distinction between these two kinds of pain.

    • @Katyloveheart
      @Katyloveheart Před 2 lety +268

      Wow that a really good point

    • @mr.miserable280
      @mr.miserable280 Před rokem +204

      Say it louder for the people in the back!

    • @glenngriffon8032
      @glenngriffon8032 Před rokem +491

      Yeah it's played for laughs how sadistic and masochistic they are but divorcing it from the funny you look and see parents who get along with their children and don't just order them to do as told, siblings who get along and play together and aren't at each other's throats because of rivalry. And what's funny is that even with the idea that Wednesday is zapping Pugsly in an electric chair, it's an activity that they both enjoy and Wednesday isn't causing her brother anything traumatizing or damaging to him.
      Obviously in real life it would totally kill him but we're not looking at that. Here is two siblings playing, Morticia shows concern Pugsly could be hurt, They both assure her this is fine and they're just having fun and Morticia trusts her kids to know their own limits of play, the boundaries, and not only lets them continue she observes them with a smile. She's supervising and enjoying watching her kids play.
      I remember a couple of times on the rare occasion my half brother and I were playing around and I was having fun and our mom just flat out broke us up cause I might get hurt and she was always so protective of me.
      I'm not saying my mom was wrong but it does feel like she broke up what could have otherwise been a small bonding moment between us and we didn't have many of those

    • @erinbathie-moore8478
      @erinbathie-moore8478 Před rokem +212

      Yes, because certain physical pain can be enjoyable and controlled by both parties. Where as emotional pain is never enjoyable and can/will push people away

    • @wiiink
      @wiiink Před rokem +67

      even though they still do stuff like play with guns and dynamite in the old black and white show, they made it clear they never physically discipline their kids and even in an episode where Morticia and Gomez thought each other were cheating, Morticia refused to use violence even tho Thing suggested it and they just wanted each other to be happy even if it was with someone else. Uncle Fester on the other hand would gladly use violence on whoever 👍

  • @oliviamackenzie9725
    @oliviamackenzie9725 Před 2 lety +9720

    Moment of appreciation for the fact that as well as being a loving husband, Gomez is an involved father. He goes to plays and parents evenings, he engages his children with their interests, and its not just the movies, in the TV show we see him cuddling his Wednesday and Pugsley. This man saw toxic masculinity and said en garde!

    • @sarroumarbeu6810
      @sarroumarbeu6810 Před 2 lety +226

      Love this comment !!

    • @Dani-et3es
      @Dani-et3es Před 2 lety +293

      I wish I could super like this comment. En garde!

    • @boobooismine1
      @boobooismine1 Před 2 lety +55

      Well, they’re supposed to be the opposite of a preppy, suburban family.

    • @Alex7Manu
      @Alex7Manu Před 2 lety +39

      Yesss

    • @sarroumarbeu6810
      @sarroumarbeu6810 Před 2 lety +62

      @@boobooismine1 aka actually Happy 😂😂

  • @DavidGowers
    @DavidGowers Před 2 lety +212

    I've ALWAYS believed that the whole Addams Family are a fantastic representation of what a genuinely healthy and caring family should be like. Gomez & Morticia adore each other and always lift each other up, as you pointed out, they're present for their kids at every opportunity, also as you guys pointed out, they have zero problems with involving a therapist if they feel it can help...the only thing really "odd" about them is they're not into loud, bright, colourful, 'happy' aesthetics. Their aesthetic is whatever makes them feel comfortable and happy with themselves and each other. Morticia and Gomez are 100% relationship goals, and the family as a whole are family goals

  • @CheshireAnn
    @CheshireAnn Před 10 měsíci +45

    Grandma adams : “Adultery?”
    Morticia Immediately : “No.”
    I love that line just because it shows, even in a small scene, that Morticia is so confident in their relationship and their marriage that she doesn’t even consider that that would be a possibility in their lives because she loves Gomez and Gomez absolutely adores her🥰🖤🖤🖤

  • @amberkelly3187
    @amberkelly3187 Před 2 lety +3875

    Instead of a remake they should have made a prequel of Mortica and Gomez’ relationship. A dark, adventure romp. A hilarious romantic comedy. I’d have watched the hell out of that.

    • @BurnTheTeddy
      @BurnTheTeddy Před rokem +153

      OH MY GOD YES THIS WOULD BE PERFECT

    • @raymondtillotson6985
      @raymondtillotson6985 Před rokem +61

      @@BurnTheTeddy I don't know, seeing how the Munsters movie worked out with the same premise, we may have dodged a bullet there.

    • @496brit
      @496brit Před rokem +36

      YES like the Heathers somehow comical bizarre and macabre and mocking romantic movies

    • @scofieldvictoria
      @scofieldvictoria Před rokem +5

      Yes

    • @sagelyne4621
      @sagelyne4621 Před rokem +3

      FACTS

  • @gray_mara
    @gray_mara Před 2 lety +1752

    She expresses a mild discomfort at having the light in her eyes. He wants to be the hero who slays the sun for her. She knows she can express her needs to him, confident he will make meeting her needs a priority.

    • @kkibela
      @kkibela Před 2 lety +120

      Or allowing him simple easy spaces to be the hero in their marriage

    • @gray_mara
      @gray_mara Před 2 lety +35

      @@kkibela What a beautiful way to describe it!

    • @coffeeteamix
      @coffeeteamix Před 2 lety +83

      I was thinking that too. And even though she spoke in French which apparently turns him on and would usually make him immediately fall all over her, he stopped what he was doing to make sure her needs are met first, and he did it in a fun way so as not to kill the mood.

    • @TriaMaxwell
      @TriaMaxwell Před 2 lety +12

      To be fair, I'm not a fan of the dayball either. LOL

    • @gergovarga321
      @gergovarga321 Před 2 lety +14

      This is one of the best thing a woman can provide their man in a relationship, to let him be her hero they both want him to be. And it works both ways and any relationship regarding sex. Providing space for your partner to grow, to shine, to be gentle to you to be nurturing to you is an awesome, selfless act. Bravo, brava!

  • @johnspetkitty81
    @johnspetkitty81 Před rokem +119

    I love that as a whole, it's generally widely accepted that Morticia and Gomez have the perfect marriage.

  • @co7314
    @co7314 Před 2 lety +56

    We see Morticia as always bathed in ethereal light... I feel like that is representing Gomez's adoration of her. He treats her like a goddess.

  • @trinaq
    @trinaq Před 2 lety +1877

    Morticia and Gomez are marriage and parent goals! Though they might be ooky, and altogether spooky, they embrace their quirky nature, and encourage their children to be different.

    • @Firegen1
      @Firegen1 Před 2 lety +32

      Hear hear! If you are likely indestructible - possibly/the living dead - be the best damn parent and spouse you can be.

    • @Werewolf.with.Internet.Access
      @Werewolf.with.Internet.Access Před 2 lety +5

      Buh duhduh DUH 🤌🤌

    • @Ashleymfranklin1990
      @Ashleymfranklin1990 Před 2 lety +8

      Couple goals

    • @liamisaac1152
      @liamisaac1152 Před 2 lety +38

      They accepted Pubert who turned “normal” for a while even though it horrified them lol 😂 They were willing to embrace that this was who he was now

    • @timothylong3110
      @timothylong3110 Před 2 lety +6

      Agreed.
      As an aside I read this to the tune of the show.

  • @tessat338
    @tessat338 Před 2 lety +686

    When I was in at the hospital, in labor before my son was born, I asked my husband, "So how are you doing? What is going on in your life?" I figured that this was the last chance for us to have an adult conversation for a while. He sat down on a chair, I gave him my full attention and we had a nice conversation about what was going on at his work and what he was reading at the time. It is one of my fondest memories.

    • @mikeyates7931
      @mikeyates7931 Před 2 lety +16

      I think that you are a Very nice and very special Lady , and your husband is a very blessed Man 💕

    • @tessat338
      @tessat338 Před 2 lety +34

      @@mikeyates7931 We ended up having a nice baby too! Nice kid still, even as a teenager. He takes after his dad!

    • @mikeyates7931
      @mikeyates7931 Před 2 lety +10

      @@tessat338 That's great - God Bless your happy family 💖

  • @ajaallison6916
    @ajaallison6916 Před rokem +63

    Quite late to this party - but - the Addams family is a FANTASTIC TOOL when teaching other people about consent. It’s funny that a couple of *suspected* serial killers embody consent so well, but they do. Gomez and Tish ask for each other’s consent in most scenes, and it’s an easy reference to say look this is natural, it doesn’t “take away from the moment” or make someone less masculine. Consent facilitates intimacy. You even see that the way Tish and Gomez parent Wednesday and Pugsly. The highest concern is always whether they both want to partake in something. Even though Tish and Gomez have been together for many years and have kids together, they still actively listen and ask for consent, both socially and intimately. Which helps foster a healthy relationship

  • @Tabbychu
    @Tabbychu Před rokem +123

    I love that Mortisha trying to help solve whatever is causing Gomez such strife was brought to attention. It really drives me crazy how trying to help solve troubles, problems, and issues for their significant others has somehow gained a negative connotation. Why is it seen as so bad to want to help them with their troubles? It's not that you have no faith or trust in them or want to undermine them or anything stupid like that. You care about them and you want to try to help. WHY IS THAT BAD

    • @watching7721
      @watching7721 Před rokem +13

      In more modern times, people are much more focused on individuality. The individual is the most important over the collective

    • @phastinemoon
      @phastinemoon Před 7 měsíci +3

      If I had to guess - the reason it goes badly is probably because the MOTIVATION for others is “I want to do this FOR them” or “if I help them, then I will be happy/rewarded”
      People take the surface actions, but do it for the wrong reasons or do it the wrong WAY.

  • @Fionacle
    @Fionacle Před 2 lety +4535

    I love how he doesn’t take out his stress and anger by beating or yelling at his family, they could get some easy drama and slapstick out of that abuse, but they don’t
    He gets his feelings out healthily by playing with trains, and while the others worry as they know what him playing with the trains means, they’re not really hurt in the long run

    • @kimhungnguyen8001
      @kimhungnguyen8001 Před 2 lety +78

      I totally agree

    • @Fuglychick
      @Fuglychick Před 2 lety +45

      I go fight on twitter. It helps!🤣

    • @glenngriffon8032
      @glenngriffon8032 Před rokem +216

      Yeah. They have concerns because they know it means Gomez is stressed, he's got a lot on his mind that he needs to work through but they don't go busting in like "we need to talk" because they trust that once he gets it out of his system he'll come to them to talk. Gomez and Morticia know each other so well, they have such complete trust in each other.

    • @Vidar33
      @Vidar33 Před rokem +65

      Also, the rest of the family know exactly what trains he uses, along what route, and what that means in terms of his feeling, by nothing more than the shaking of the house. All of them care deeply for each other, and know one another to a scary degree.

    • @WiseSageBum
      @WiseSageBum Před rokem +52

      It's a good sign on all sides
      Gomez gets his stress out without harming his family, and his family know him well enough that him playing with trains means he's in a bad headspace
      Everyone's looking out for each other

  • @taz2906
    @taz2906 Před 2 lety +1184

    ‘Cara Mia’ is actually Italian and I think it’s adorable that Gomez answers Morticia’s French with the other language of love.

    • @ladyredl3210
      @ladyredl3210 Před 2 lety +48

      I was about to say, isn't that Italian? Lol.

    • @stephr2980
      @stephr2980 Před 2 lety +23

      I was scrolling through comments wondering about that. He speaks mostly Italian to her, doesn't he?

    • @Nicamon
      @Nicamon Před 2 lety +55

      @@ladyredl3210 In the Italian version he says:"Carra mia."which sounds more Spanish,but it's actually not and I realized it *just now* because I checked and:"Cara mia."in Spanish is actually:"Querida mia."and now I feel stupid because I should have known that!😅

    • @Revanbzn
      @Revanbzn Před 2 lety +26

      Cara mia is Italian yes it means my darling basically

    • @Nicamon
      @Nicamon Před 2 lety +47

      @@stephr2980 Well...let's see...
      02:58 Italian
      03:03 - 03:06 French
      03:10 - 03:11 Spanish
      11:06 Italian
      11:12 - 11:13 Spanish
      22:51 This is...complicated.😅Because"bravo"is an italian word,but the last letter should change depending on how many people you are talking about and if they are males or females(bravo=masculine singular,brava=feminine singular,brave=feminine plural,bravi=masculine plural or neutral plural)so if it was actual Italian he should have said:"Bravi!"if he wanted to refer to _both_ Wedensday and Pugsley and not only Pugsley,so I guess this counts as..English,where you use"bravo"for every cases?😅
      So I'd say Spanis and Italian are a tie(in these scenes,at least)and then French once.😁

  • @fuchainsa
    @fuchainsa Před 2 lety +115

    I never thought much about it until now, but I believe the Addams will always be a happy family because they accept all the typical “evil”, “gloomy”, or “macabre” like elements and events in life that would usually tear apart the typical family. Even when they do have a family problem, they are so used to adapting and living in chaotic events that that problem is quickly solved and they even grow stronger as a family EVERY TIME!

  • @lostthoughts73
    @lostthoughts73 Před 2 lety +97

    I just realised that I unknowingly defined my own idea of a family and a happy relationship based on the Addams Famile and honestly, I am quite happy with that

  • @briana00grace
    @briana00grace Před 2 lety +1904

    “We demand some serious kink in our healthy, happy marriages!” Not what I was expecting to hear, but absolutely correct and I’m quoting this forever now

  • @misery8264
    @misery8264 Před 2 lety +903

    This was the first depiction of a healthy marriage I saw as a child. Most on-screen couples in the 90's hated each other, and it made me hate the concept of marriage a little bit :D

    • @wintergarden7539
      @wintergarden7539 Před 2 lety +5

      I can't think of one.

    • @FWilson15
      @FWilson15 Před 2 lety +37

      Home Improvement is the first example that comes to mind of the 90's couples who hated each other. Tim Allen's character was so toxic and the wife wasn't much better.

    • @3Rayfire
      @3Rayfire Před 2 lety +10

      If you had to choose between Al and Peggy or Gomez and Morticia, there's really no contest if you want to be happy.

    • @AB-sm1qf
      @AB-sm1qf Před 2 lety +20

      This. Especially when you grow up seeing your parents and everyone else’s parents around you hate each other and have awful marriages, things like this can make people give up before they even start. This movie ironically showed me WHY so many people have bad relationships and it did that in a healthy, organic way not in a fantasious idealistic way. It showed raw, organic and balanced loving relationships where both parties are happy and steering their ship. I think what society gets wrong in most relationships is that one has to be the captain of the ship in that relationship when it’s so much better when two steering that forth. As a kid this movie made me view the lovely well adjusted side of what people can be and look forward to it.

    • @luci_datum
      @luci_datum Před 2 lety +12

      That's actually the reason they love eachother
      The Addams Family is meant to be an inverse of classic 90's tropes on family sitcoms, hence the marriage being healthy. You'll see it everywhere you look - the family pet is a hand, Morticia actively cuts flowers off bushes in her garden in one (fucking amazing) scene, they prefer Gothic styles, they simply accept and encourage over belittle and deny. It's wonderful to see, and sad it came about as something to use as a punchline at the time

  • @LiluBob
    @LiluBob Před 2 lety +176

    I cannot even begin to say how much I enjoyed this video. My daughter and I are seriously disabled, and we are in constant, constant physical pain. How we survive all of this is through a deep sense of black humor. It is the ability to laugh at ourselves and at the pain and horror of our lives that helps us survive. So I of course cherish this movie, as does my daughter. And we too have always looked at them as being an ideal example of a good marriage, a good relationship, and good parents. It also tickles our funny bone. But what was so striking to me about your analysis and all that you pointed out in this film was how much it reminds me of my daughter and her husband‘s relationship. They are not able to have children because of her disease, and her disability, but nearly all that you pointed out here, most especially the dark humor, and how it plays into what works in the relationship, had me howling with laughter over how much it reminds me so wonderfully and so beautifully of my glorious daughter and her husband. I just sent her a copy of the clip.

  • @ladymeldiriel9486
    @ladymeldiriel9486 Před rokem +77

    I love the scene with the doctor where she uses a term Gomez has never heard of and he immediately has so much respect for Morticia that he turns to her and asks if she knows anything about it, sort of like 'if I don't know what this is, maybe Morticia knows because she's also smart.' And then they both eagerly sit and learn about this new concept together, just another way to bond as a couple.

  • @JonduGaming
    @JonduGaming Před 2 lety +638

    "I'll be the victim!"
    "All your life."
    Imma use that one!😂😂

    • @sarroumarbeu6810
      @sarroumarbeu6810 Před 2 lety +18

      The delivery 😂😂😂

    • @themurdernerd
      @themurdernerd Před rokem

      As a weirdo goth(ish) teen girl, I related to Wednesday in this one so much!

  • @HalloweenYearRound
    @HalloweenYearRound Před 2 lety +1011

    Absolutely love Gomez and Morticia. They're the antithesis to the typical bickering sitcom couple that's usually not a healthy relationship. Plus they're weird but they completely own it!

    • @elieli2893
      @elieli2893 Před 2 lety +63

      I find it so weird that people in general just, accepted the "strained marriage and a couple hating each other and possibly also their kids while dependant enough on each other not to get a divorce" as "okay, this is comedy, so relatable!" It... Is everyone okay? Why do we not have more iconic couples that are, you know, in a healthy relationship? Why do so many movie couples seem to be a bad personality match for each other? I'm so tired of the whole trope about a couple unable to communicate and thus, drama ensues, but in the end it's okay because someone else told the other person what their partner is actually thinking and now they're in love again! Um... No? Please learn to communicate? Something is wrong if a person not involved in your relationship has to translate your partner to you..? Morticia and Gomez are so refreshing :'D And they're somehow supposed to be the monsters? (excluding the whole, murderous, pretty insane, highly probably undead part :'D)

    • @caitlin329
      @caitlin329 Před 2 lety +15

      It's a pretty recent phenomenon in sitcoms to have couples who seem to hate each other as the norm. There's probably an interesting bit of analysis and research to do there.

    • @rachaelknudsen8801
      @rachaelknudsen8801 Před 2 lety +22

      @@caitlin329 I submit that it's not. The Honeymooners is an classic 1950's TV show which acted like spousal abuse and disdain were normal. The dysfunctional relationship as normal has existed for decades. It's grown more pervasive in recent years, but it's sadly not new.

    • @caitlin329
      @caitlin329 Před 2 lety +4

      @@rachaelknudsen8801 It is the idea that it's the norm or the default. The Dick Van Dyke Show was incredibly successful and they loved each other despite disagreements and conflict.
      In shows which focused especially on families, especially more 'traditional' or honestly just suburban, they often were actually quite happy and loving in general. It just depends on where the show decided to get its jokes and comedy from.

    • @morganrobinson8042
      @morganrobinson8042 Před 2 lety +4

      @@caitlin329 See, what's missing from this interpretation, as well as the one you're arguing against is the context from the inception of the original show, and the way that Gomez and Morticia managed to sort of outlast one toxic cliché to stand in contrast to the one that superseded it, a few different times.
      In the 50's and 60's censorship meant that couples on Tv we pretty much neutered. Weird and concerning stuff like showing nearly no physical affection and sleeping in separate beds to avoid even circuitous implications of a married couple having a sex life. The Addams', as tame as they may seem now, were pretty much the only couple on Tv with a healthy interest in one another. Actually arguing wasn't really a part of it, few shows of the period went into anything but the tamest conflicts and I'm not sure any that did were even running concurrently. It just wasn't allowed to have a couple in discord, too controversial.
      But with the counterculture movement that loosened up, and writers started riffing on the tropes and methods of the sitcom. It usually happened in cycles of deconstructing and reconstructing the genre, thee Addams Family was pretty much the start of the trend, being based upon comics that had been running in the New Yorker for years. The arguing couple as the basis for the plot showed up mostly in the 70's and 90's to 2000's, largely influenced by the recession in the first and Gen-x cynicism reassessing the boom years of the 80's in the latter. More placid characterizations of on sort or another tended to fill in the gaps but aren't nearly as well remembered.
      In effect, Gomez and Morticia aren't directly opposed to any specific trends since their adaptation in the 60's, the genre conventions shifted around their unshakable foundations. The constructed problems of more dynamically cynical shows or the implicit inadequacy of the more toothless have very little to do with them really. They're living their best life, and the more normal people just got in their own way more, usually by trying to be something besides themselves.

  • @jeanne-marielawson7290
    @jeanne-marielawson7290 Před rokem +69

    Love this. At the end when you said they don’t neglect their kids, the perfect contrasting example is the parents from The Willoughbys who are also kinky and obsessed with each other but truly horrible neglectful parents.

  • @aprilhollow5780
    @aprilhollow5780 Před rokem +40

    I liked how in the other movie when the baby gets “sick” and turns into a blond haired rosey cheeked baby that all other parents would give anything to have Morticia is worried but does not abandon the baby even though it’s not showing typical Adam’s traits anymore. She even reads the baby The Cat and the Hat which horrifies her but she does it because she recognizes that’s what her baby wants right then. Love that. I wondered if there children ever rebelled and went through a Britney Spears phase what would they do. And that answered the question. They’d be horrified but supportive. ❤❤❤

  • @funkyjbass7762
    @funkyjbass7762 Před 2 lety +2868

    "Anything is foreplay"; I remember hearing of a elderly Jamaican man talking to some young guys who were wanting to know why he was so successful in his marriage. And his answer was "EVERYTHING" is foreplay. I always remember that. The 'sex' is just the end of everything you have done to make her feel special, and everything is an opportunity to make your partner feel special.

    • @RenTheCrow
      @RenTheCrow Před 2 lety +114

      Woah, I love that, so much. so much, omg. my brain is fizzling just thinking about it.

    • @thethmooteresa
      @thethmooteresa Před 2 lety +12

      @@RenTheCrow sameee!!!

    • @minagica
      @minagica Před 2 lety +77

      My exes were greedy selfish fucks regarding foreplay. I'm honestly going to blame it on misuse of porn due to having been exposed to it years before their first time having sex (I don't think porn would be evil or should be illegalized, I just think it's counterproductive for virgins)

    • @Trollestiatumblur
      @Trollestiatumblur Před 2 lety +50

      @@minagica Absolutely agree. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve told men that porn isn’t real, and virgins think they will be good at sex because of porn… no! I’m talking to a virgin right now, and we already expressed we wanted to have sex, I still need to have a few talks with him before our/his first time having sex.

    • @blaznskais2048
      @blaznskais2048 Před 2 lety +85

      He ain’t wrong. If I came home from work and I saw that my partner had gotten a jump on all the chores that needed doing, dinner was cooked and ready when I got home. They definitely be getting some that night.

  • @fazbearfanatic4358
    @fazbearfanatic4358 Před 2 lety +335

    I love how the Addams family, who is obsessed with death, is the best at keeping their marriage alive

    • @remi5309
      @remi5309 Před 2 lety +22

      i think its because they are supposed to be the opposite of a "perfect suburban " family which tends to have dead marriages

  • @isabelleschiltz5596
    @isabelleschiltz5596 Před 2 lety +74

    7 tips/ principles :
    1- Enhance your love maps.
    2- Nurture fondness and admiration
    3- Turn toward each other (rather than against or away).
    4- Let you partner influence you.
    5- Solve your solvable problems.
    6- Overcome gridlock.
    7- Create shared meaning.

  • @AuntLoopy123
    @AuntLoopy123 Před 2 lety +34

    If Gomez and Morticia were to be arrested for public indecency, they'd probably ask for copies of the mug shots to put in their family album, and refer to them often, just like they reminisce about their honeymoon. And although they're in separate cells, they'd be in separate cells together, at the same time, fantasizing about the other one, and "What is he/she doing now?" and probably using the left-over ink on their fingertips (from fingerprinting) to write "I love Tish/Gomez" notes on the cell walls.
    Yeah, that would be a story to tell the kids, particularly when giving them "The Talk," such as right before the kid gets married, they say, "I hope you share some wonderful experiences with your spouse, just like your we did," sort of thing.
    In short, it would not only not bother them, but they'd get off on it, even more. Although they are practical enough that they'd probably just remember it, for special occasions, and not try to get arrested again. After all, they do NOT neglect their children, and if they were to get stuck in jail for a long time, that would adversely affect the children, and they can't have that. So, I believe it would be a "one and done" situation with them.

  • @diamondflaw
    @diamondflaw Před 2 lety +759

    Gomez and Morticia are 100% marriage role models for us. 16 years in and still going strong. Also, as far as I'm concerned Anjelica Houston EMBODIES Morticia in this movie, I have seen no other depiction that captures the character so perfectly.

    • @thehutch7728
      @thehutch7728 Před 2 lety +18

      That’s so funny! It was hard for me to accept her, because I grew up on the TV show reruns with Carolyn Jones and John Astin. Morticia was who I wanted to be when I grew up.

    • @rebeccahahn6172
      @rebeccahahn6172 Před 2 lety +8

      Us too! My other half (of 4 years as of August) even randomly grabs my hand and kisses up my arm just to make me giggle. We are RIDICULOUS and I LOVE IT. It's safe for me to play and be "kooky" with him, and he knows what it takes for me to trust to that level.

    • @alicecain4851
      @alicecain4851 Před 2 lety

      I adore Anjelica and wish she had done more.
      I know she's not everyone's "beautiful" - she's so much more!

  • @mangaanimefan3089
    @mangaanimefan3089 Před 2 lety +4828

    There's a really small moment in Values that shows off another facet of Gomez and Morticia's parenting that I can really appreciate now that I'm older. When Morticia's in labor and Wednesday and Pugsley are in the waiting room and this 'normal' girl is giving this cutesy explanation of where she believes babies come from and then Wednesday chimes in that her parents are having a baby because: "They had sex". And it's meant to be funny that she says that so bluntly but, looking back at it, what Wednesday was told was a hell of a lot better than the saccharine crap that other girl(who looked to be close to Wednesday's age) was told.
    Morticia and Gomez gave their children an honest, maybe detailed?, talk about the birds and the bees and neither of them were scarred by it. So, I liked to see that.

    • @CinemaTherapyShow
      @CinemaTherapyShow  Před 2 lety +2116

      Alan here, we’ve been teaching our kids about sex since they could talk and look at people. If you make it a normal part of life, and not some weird hidden secret, guess what? It’s a normal part of life that’s not weird or embarrassing. Learned it from Wednesday Addams (my first movie crush)

    • @mangaanimefan3089
      @mangaanimefan3089 Před 2 lety +569

      @@CinemaTherapyShow I've no doubt Wednesday was the first crush of many boys(and girls) in the 90s. 🤭

    • @MysticMae21
      @MysticMae21 Před 2 lety +300

      I've been told about it from before I can remember.
      Obviously I wasn't told details, but as I got older, more age appropriate details were added.

    • @ruserious2966
      @ruserious2966 Před 2 lety +322

      It's true my mom was very open about it to the point that our private joke is that she 'scarred' me for life. Years later when I had my first time it was as funnily akward and yet still a good experience as she told me it was going to be. My mother was made sure my younger sister and I had a very healthy sexual education growing up and now both of us are very responsible sexually active adults. Funny how that works out huh.

    • @astoldbynickgerr
      @astoldbynickgerr Před 2 lety +126

      I’m 20 and neither of my parents have given me “the talk” 💀 It’s okay though, I think I feel more comfortable learning on my own from sexperts on the internet.

  • @sophieamandaleitontoomey9343

    I always found it ironic that the couple we would normally perceive as “odd” or “different” is actually the one with the most healthy and loving relationship and marriage.

  • @AuntLoopy123
    @AuntLoopy123 Před 2 lety +268

    I came back to watch this again, because I was just talking with my Mom about how successful Mom and Dad's marriage was, and it reminded me of this.
    I like in the first bit, where Gomez says, "Woo her. Admire her. Make her feel like she is the most sublime creature on the planet." He never says anything about complimenting her looks (which of course, he DOES, but that's not the point of the advice), but complimenting HER. Some people just can't bear to hear compliments about their looks, largely because they are not Hollywood Hot, and have been told all the lives that their looks just don't measure up, so if you say, "You're beautiful," they'll call you a liar. But if you say, "You are smart!" or "You are kind!" or "You have a real gift for X," they'll believe THAT, and take it to heart and appreciate it. They will feel sublime, if you admire their favorite qualities.
    Morticia knows she's gorgeous, and appreciates the compliments, because she knows they are true. Fanny Price, of Jane Austen's Mansfield Park, falls for the compliments to her character, while shying away from compliments that involved *being looked at.*
    That's just another aspect of KNOWING your partner, and knowing not only what is sublime about them, but what makes them FEEL sublime, and honoring and admiring that.

  • @michaelleoanrd194
    @michaelleoanrd194 Před 2 lety +5606

    Edit: apparently not true according to a Spanish speaker.
    One detail that is ALWAYS overlooked in the school play scene (and I'll forgive you because it's not about Gomez and Morticia's relationship, but the relationship with their kids) is that Gomez doesn't just shout "Bravo" He shouts bravo (masculine) and brava (feminine). He makes sure to applaud each of his children and it's a detail you'd miss if you didn't think about it being a romantic language. A lot of captioning actually gets it wrong and thinks he repeats "bravo."

  • @gingergoddess8953
    @gingergoddess8953 Před 2 lety +1158

    If my kids did what Wednesday and Pugsley did on stage, I'd be *so* proud. Wednesday's Shakespearean delivery actually isnt too bad.

    • @ameliecarre4783
      @ameliecarre4783 Před 2 lety +80

      Also, delightful period music, and perfect curtsy at the end. Entirely lovely.

    • @3Rayfire
      @3Rayfire Před 2 lety +48

      Wednesday most certainly studies classical drama, her execution of Gary's "vision" in Values says it all, "Your work is puerile and under-dramatized. You lack any sense of structure, character, and the Aristotelian unities."

    • @rhaenyralikesyoutube6289
      @rhaenyralikesyoutube6289 Před 2 lety +6

      Me too. She's awesome in her drama club.

    • @tararocksong5085
      @tararocksong5085 Před 2 lety +8

      I’d give Wednesday an A+ for the performance alone.

    • @mangaanimefan3089
      @mangaanimefan3089 Před 2 lety +10

      @@3Rayfire And was she wrong? I mean, I know the comedy is in how bad it was but jeez! Gary's "vision" was utter cow s**t.

  • @Serai3
    @Serai3 Před rokem +48

    My family life as a kid in the 60's was chaotic and unpleasant, with narcissistic parents and health issues they refused to acknowledge. The one thing I wanted most in the world was to escape, and I wanted desperately to be an Addams. They modeled the perfect family for me. (I was never taken in by those cardboard TV families.) They were happy and loving, and their kids never had to be afraid of them. I couldn't imagine a childhood like that, but I wanted it so much. (The other place I wanted to escape to was outer space - I was a Star Trek fan even as a little kid when it first aired.)

  • @xsunlx
    @xsunlx Před rokem +199

    As a member of the "horrible goth weirdo monster people" club I thoroughly enjoyed this! You guys seem to enjoy these films as much as I do.
    On a serious note, I was around 9-10yrs old when these films came out and at the time I had the WORST examples of relationships. My parents were horribly toxic and I grew up in a chaotic and abusive home. This film blew my mind as a child and became my beacon of hope. I remember thinking "THIS IS WHAT I WANT!" And I'm beyond happy to say that I've been in a loving and healthy relationship with my husband for nearly 20 years and behind closed doors we are very much like Morticia and Gomez (we're not into PDA lol).

  • @1986kerrichinchilla
    @1986kerrichinchilla Před 2 lety +1533

    I love how the adams family is so accepting of poeple. When IT marries the auction woman, they dont try to change her and make her like them, they accept who she is.

    • @voguishthrone5887
      @voguishthrone5887 Před rokem +234

      And they make an effort to include her in their family activities! Like in the first movie, when they play wake the dead they explain it to her instead of belittling her so she can join in!

    • @dzbanecekfrost666
      @dzbanecekfrost666 Před rokem +65

      Well, I'm pretty sure they've known Margaret for years since she had been married to Tully. And they have always accepted her. That's beautiful

    • @twindrill2852
      @twindrill2852 Před rokem +10

      Kinda funny considering she DID change a bit in the sequel. She looks and acts rather different, a bit more suave and sly.

    • @_50_ducks_
      @_50_ducks_ Před rokem +16

      ​@@twindrill2852 I think the reason she seems different is because she's not around sully anymore, and she is happier with what is going on with her life

  • @TimDownsAnimation
    @TimDownsAnimation Před 2 lety +2713

    Morticia is honestly a role model in a lot of ways. She’s always 100% HER. She does not budge from who she is, but at the same time she doesn’t ask any of the “normal” people to. When she judges, she’s p much silent about it and is very validating, but that goes both ways and she expresses herself in public just as boldly as everyone else. The ONE time I can think of where she outright judges someone out loud is to insult Debbie after she’s very clearly been revealed to be a genuinely evil person ruining the family: “But really, Deborah? …….. Pastels?” Lol

    • @themurdernerd
      @themurdernerd Před rokem +229

      LOVE that line!!! "You have placed in under some strange sexual spell. I respect that."

    • @ForestSen
      @ForestSen Před rokem +145

      And I’m sure she wouldn’t have even mentioned the pastels at all if she stayed part of the family. Morticia would have just accepted it and worked around Debbie’s pastel fixation. 😂 she had no problems with Margaret and her “normalcy”. She just accepted her and her pink princess dress (I think she was dressed as Glinda?)

    • @Gummy_Pop.
      @Gummy_Pop. Před rokem +4

      Iconic line 🤣

    • @deathwish-fs1ib
      @deathwish-fs1ib Před rokem +48

      @@ForestSen It does seem to be a running theme that while they consider everyone else strange compared to themselves, they still respect them and at no point try to make others change to fit into their 'normal'. They're probably the nicest family in the fiction overall and I think everyone should strive to be more like the Addams Family.
      Heck, even Wednesday, the most sinister of them all, tends to avoid causing issues for others unless they cause issues for her and has shown a desire to punish bullies in pretty much every rendition of her character.

    • @rebeccahahn6172
      @rebeccahahn6172 Před rokem +12

      And judging her extremes in clothing is far different than judging who she is as a person.

  • @Tania-rg7jp
    @Tania-rg7jp Před rokem +58

    This touches on so many reasons why I’m so opinionated on how Morticia and Gomez are portrayed that I couldn’t put into words. They are one of the few examples of healthy, consummate love in a long marriage on a tv screen that we have. Thank you!

  • @kathubbard62
    @kathubbard62 Před rokem +33

    The fact they’re supposed to be the opposite of a “normal family” but has the most healthiest relationships with each member. 😭😭

    • @gonzoyork1908
      @gonzoyork1908 Před rokem +1

      I agree they're the opposite of a health relationship but toss the other side of the coin.Wait there really care about each other support there kids on there dreams they want ti further there Education like Mortisha said to Wednesday teacher i tell my Wedsday college first.

  • @Radhaun
    @Radhaun Před 2 lety +2560

    My parents acted not entirely dissimilar to Gomez and Morticia and both often joked that our family was just like theirs. I grew up with the assumption that *this was* how people in love behaved. I was really thrown for a loop when I got older and encountered the "partners that hate each other" trope.

    • @Tevikolady
      @Tevikolady Před rokem +309

      My mother and father loved each other deeply, and weren't afraid to show it. I think it's honestly healthier to show your children how to love, and what to look for in a partner, so that when they grow up, they too can look for healthy relationship partners by finding something along the lines of what their parents have. I don't think families do that. Much of the 'healthy' part of the relationship like kissing, and complimenting each other and building each other up is hidden from kids, yet the sex isn't??? I don't get it.

    • @erinbathie-moore8478
      @erinbathie-moore8478 Před rokem +133

      Honestly? As someone who grew up with divorced parents and had an unhealthy relationship with one of them and most of the kids I grew up with (and asd), more healthy (generic) relationship representation would be highly appreciated

    • @msk-qp6fn
      @msk-qp6fn Před rokem +54

      I am happy for you fellow human. You have one of the best yet underrated blessings a human being can be blessed with.

    • @pokaay3163
      @pokaay3163 Před rokem +30

      That’s crazy to me. My parents aren’t divorced but their only reason for not being so is for me and my sibling to have two parents in one household. Which I’m grateful for, but it’s strange. Neither of them believe in being able to find a relationship wherein both parties love each other for as long as they’re together. Whenever I talk about wanting to find a partner that respects me and to have a happy relationship with them they tell me not to have high expectations for it. I would much rather be single than find myself in a relationship akin to theirs, or worse. It’s not entirely loveless, but it’s definitely not happy. I always wonder what it would’ve been like to grow up with parents that actually loved each other, healthily. I feel happy for the children that do.
      Morticia and gomez is such a fun dynamic to watch. I love the Addams family (not so much the animated ver.). I really think we need to see more relationships like theirs in media. Dysfunctional families aren’t the only way to derive conflict.

    • @excusemeifimstupid5910
      @excusemeifimstupid5910 Před rokem +9

      @@erinbathie-moore8478 like seriously. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a relationship where both parties loved the other healthily to the point that it sounds like a fantasy. It would help me see people in better light.

  • @alexthegrape2848
    @alexthegrape2848 Před 2 lety +925

    I think this movie had a huge hand in shaping my concepts of relationships as a kid and helped me break a lot of the toxic masculinity I had been taught as a young man

    • @ilovelittlemix4034
      @ilovelittlemix4034 Před 2 lety +25

      :)

    • @Drekromancer
      @Drekromancer Před 2 lety +29

      Congratulations, king. 👑 We will free ourselves from our shackles, one man at a time.

    • @scarletjester7831
      @scarletjester7831 Před 2 lety +3

      I don't use terms like toxic masculinity, I prefer Toxic Behavior, but I see what you mean. Gomez and Morticia are textbook examples of a healthy relationship

  • @drehendesMausrad
    @drehendesMausrad Před rokem +58

    This is so wholesome 😍 I watched it multiple times now and I am still giggling like a school girl about all this wholesome, weird, grotesque marriage

  • @ajjamsen694
    @ajjamsen694 Před 8 měsíci +9

    Jonathan: "...I think he looks HELLA fine!"
    *Alan looks away, blushing and chuckling*
    I LOVE how wholesome these two are. Always bringing each other up. We must protect these precious men!

  • @Luubelaar
    @Luubelaar Před 2 lety +1412

    Forget "Romeo and Juliet". Morticia and Gomez are the greatest love story. They are couple goals, and parent goals. They clearly love each other, make time for each other, support the other in their passions, and have shared interests. They don't neglect their kids, and sure they're a very different family, but never do they discourage their kids from being who they are.
    Edit added 5+ months later: I KNOW R&J IS A TRAGEDY NOT A LOVE STORY. THAT'S MY POINT!!!!!!!!!

    • @miraijfish
      @miraijfish Před 2 lety +61

      Romeo and juliet is problematic at best

    • @erilayne260
      @erilayne260 Před 2 lety +29

      Eff Romeo and Juliet. Never really liked that stuff even if it was for the sake of grades or something.

    • @xAlecto
      @xAlecto Před 2 lety +70

      To be fair, I don't think Shakespeare intended Romeo and Juliet to be as idolized as a couple they are now.

    • @acelovesdiyschristopher7023
      @acelovesdiyschristopher7023 Před 2 lety +14

      Not to mention that they're both adults instead of just one.

    • @veronikamajerova4564
      @veronikamajerova4564 Před 2 lety +15

      Well, since I wanted to kill Romeo myself after the first act, while I adore Morticia and Gomez...

  • @gurglequeen433
    @gurglequeen433 Před 2 lety +855

    The Addams family are like, my ideal, my goal for the kind of family I want to build in the future.

    • @trinaq
      @trinaq Před 2 lety +40

      Me too, the Addams' are a very accepting family, we should all aspire to embrace our differences.

    • @qwertydavid8070
      @qwertydavid8070 Před 2 lety +29

      make sure to not forget the disembodied hand

    • @gurglequeen433
      @gurglequeen433 Před 2 lety +30

      @@qwertydavid8070 I already got that part covered.

    • @marshmallow927
      @marshmallow927 Před 2 lety +13

      @@gurglequeen433 Hold on-

    • @neuralmute
      @neuralmute Před 2 lety +3

      @@marshmallow927 That's the hand's job!

  • @gabrielamarcus
    @gabrielamarcus Před rokem +24

    I feel part of their way of leading their lives as a couple as well as parents, is the fact they don't stick with societal expectations... They are supportive of each other, of their kids... They march to their own drum, not society's...

    • @watching7721
      @watching7721 Před rokem +2

      To a degree, they're conforming to the spooky goth standard

  • @charlayned
    @charlayned Před rokem +25

    OMG, I love this! I think I can honestly say that my beloved husband, Bruce, and I are the real-life Morticia and Gomez. Not quite as dark, but just as weirdly committed. Met as a science fiction convention, got busy the first "date", moved in in 2 1/2 months, married on Halloween night six months after meeting. We get the "icky sweet" couple award all the time because we actually like being with each other. The covid lockdown wasn't bad, he worked from home and took care of me (I have MS). We sat and shared your video and just laughed (holding hands, no kidding.) We're both now 65, been married 29 years in two weeks, and we aren't your usual grandparents. (4 kids, 9 grandkids). We went on our "honeymoon cruise" finally, I had purple and green hair (look at the picture) and he wore his black kilt to dinner one night. He looks like Santa year round (white beard) and could have pulled off the "vacation Santa" with his Hawaiian shirts we bought him. I sold two sets of the first 4 novels in my vampire series "Fangs & Halos" on the cruise too. (yes, vampires and angels, and a vampire cat who is a snark.) My youngest daughter could do a great Wednesday Addams when she was in school (now has 3 kids, one almost out of high school), and my eldest granddaughter, now in college, IS the Wednesday in our family. Oh, and my signature line is "I'm the grandmother your mother warned you about."
    After two failed marriages for me and one for him, we were afraid of the "M Word" but ended up married anyway. And it's glorious. So, you have two watchers who could be the models for well-adjusted, loving, but just weird married couple.

  • @Septic-Hearts
    @Septic-Hearts Před 2 lety +427

    Despite being literal homicidal lunatics the Addams family has the healthiest relationship dynamics I've ever seen in media. People should aim to be like Morticia and Gomez, just the right amount of crazy for each other.

  • @TheDragonsRose
    @TheDragonsRose Před 2 lety +825

    The animated versions that came out recently really did this family dirty. They made their relationships seem much more toxic, primarily Morticia and Wednesday's relationship. When Wednesday chooses to change her appearance, Morticia scolds her for wearing pink, like Wed is under an obligation to be only as Morticia expects.

    • @alyssamay9237
      @alyssamay9237 Před 2 lety +298

      Broke Morticia: “You’re my daughter and you can’t wear pink!”
      Woke Morticia: “I can’t say I’m too pleased with Wednesday’s current style, but if that’s what she wants, who am I to get in the way of that?”

    • @demy1393
      @demy1393 Před 2 lety +68

      @@alyssamay9237 isn't that pretty much what goes with the summer camp in the sequel?

    • @alyssamay9237
      @alyssamay9237 Před 2 lety +35

      @@demy1393 that too! Supportive parents!

    • @Brey__
      @Brey__ Před 2 lety +175

      For real, like in the second movie where Pubert turned blonde and “normal”, they bemoaned over the sudden change but they never really did anything to the baby-in fact, they changed the baby’s room to a pastel coloured room (which we all know Morticia hates) because she thought it’s what “normal” Pubert would want.

    • @thatvalensteingirl
      @thatvalensteingirl Před 2 lety +175

      @@Brey__ Morticia sat and lovingly read Dr. Seuss, to her own disdain, bc it made Pubert happy instead of trying to impart her own tastes on him. That was awesome, she was willing to set aside her own comfort and familiarity for her children

  • @paultuck
    @paultuck Před rokem +28

    The weird plant in the background that didn't like the sun is likely Cleopatra, or a smaller potted offshoot of it. In the 60s show it was Mortica's pet plant she had and was very carnivorous, preferring large lumps of raw meat.
    I agree everyone did a fantastic job as their characters.
    I also had a crush on Christina Ricci as Wednesday. I think a lot of guys our age did.

  • @AlexandeKnight
    @AlexandeKnight Před 2 lety +39

    The other thing I love about these two is just how much fun they have together and the level of play. It permeates everything that they do.

  • @trinaq
    @trinaq Před 2 lety +1355

    Funnily enough, if Debbie hadn't been so insane, she would have been instantly accepted by the Addamses', since they were nothing but understanding of her murderous background! 😂🖤🕸️

    • @acrylicgodoy
      @acrylicgodoy Před 2 lety +347

      I think it was more because she was selfish, robbing Fester away, and marrying him only for money... Pastel preference aside... She was for sure almost perfect for their circle. They didn't mind that she was insane

    • @gurglequeen433
      @gurglequeen433 Před 2 lety +318

      If she hadn't tried to break up the family, they would have accepted her as the psychopath she is.

    • @Vashtibucket
      @Vashtibucket Před 2 lety +92

      @@gurglequeen433 Yeah I agree lol Debbie was the one who wanted to break the family up, but she fit right in.

    • @jimmoriarty9440
      @jimmoriarty9440 Před 2 lety +149

      "But do any of you love me? Do any of you truly love me?"
      "Hands!"
      *everyone struggles to raise a hand*
      She'd fit perfectly with them if she could accept that. However, once Grandmama curses you I think your time is limited.

    • @CortexNewsService
      @CortexNewsService Před 2 lety +11

      Right?!?!?

  • @ashleytuchin7693
    @ashleytuchin7693 Před 2 lety +472

    The great thing about The Addams Family is that even though they have macabre and grotesque sensibilities, they're actually kind, loving and accepting people who are always quick to help others. It's a great contrast.

  • @tyrannosauruswrex123
    @tyrannosauruswrex123 Před 8 měsíci +6

    I think every couple could use Gomez and morticia as an example of a healthy, stable, passionate romantic relationship. If couples were more like them, then I think divorce would become practically non-existent.

  • @thegpshowtheshow
    @thegpshowtheshow Před rokem +23

    I really like how both mortisha and Gomez embody both traditional masculine and feminine traits and this isn't really considered a bad thing