Hey! This is one of the leap members from the fall/winter leap course--if anyone is on the fence about taking it, I highly suggest you do. Taking it propelled me forwards in ways I didn't expect as someone who thought their style was already developed at the time of starting, and my coursemates were absolutely lovely and we had so many great discussions. You get out as much as if not more than you put in and it's so worth it for anybody looking for a safe space to talk about style without judgment and it's really just fantastic.
This video made me realise I'm in the integration phsase now and I achieved it just by adding very few seasonal pieces I felt I lacked and what actually contributed most to the feeling of contentment was decluttering my wardrobe according to Ruby logic. Finding new homes for the clothes that just weren't comfortable enough or didn't feel like me any more gave me so much joy and freed some physical and mental space for the clothes I actually like and want to wear ❤
As a ruby “outsider” I’m working on adding fancy/formal wear . I have a very boyish aesthetic and really struggle at formal attire. I feel like a clown or like I’m in costume when I go formal which feels really obvious this time of year. Really struggling to add dimension to my wardrobe. But I rock all jeans/cords/sweatshirts/tees. So I know what works for me just need to feel confident taking risks I guess???? I take a lot of inspiration from Kristen Stewart (even before discovering your style system). Hoping something resonates with me. So glad to have found your channel.
i don’t know if i’m an outsider, cool girl, or wildflower, but i have often felt the same. before i started working on my style recently, i often ended up underdressed at kind-of dressy events because i didn’t know what to wear and just put on my “uniform” to feel more comfortable and solve for decision fatigue (and which i think i look good in for casual wear), but i would feel uncomfortable once i got there because i didn’t like how i looked and felt like i was dressed totally inappropriately. i have found so far in my work on my style that it’s been helpful to have a range of “dressy” clothes I really like so I can more easily choose the comfort level when getting dressed, but feel that all my choices are formal enough to not be looking like my everyday casual uniforms. my range includes: -black skinny jeans that are very black and good quality/condition that I can pair with sparkly or sexier tops (instead of a t shirt or flannel button up that i would normally wear with jeans). these jeans i save for dressing sharp, unlike my other black skinny jeans that i’ll run errands in or wear in the garden or woodshop. i’d love to get another pair that’s like, waxed or something for a more attention-grabbing texture. -full length silk maxi skirt. i actually made it, and recently dyed it from a dusty mauve pink to an indigo. beautiful washed silk twill sheen and floaty movement -a brightly colored silk blazer. this was a thrift shop find. over a white t shirt, black jeans or joggers, it looks do nice but not too businessy, also not too fancy. -skater skirt + tights, this can give a younger and fun “dresses up” look but it’s not super flashy and can a wide range of “dressing up” without looking like my casual clothes. i have a velvet one but would like other textures. -tops: besides monochromatic sequin t shirts (i have white), i also have a fair amount of silk boxy tees (non stretch) and silk camisoles with patterns or prints or shine to them (those are a little sexier). these could pair with any of the bottoms above? -outerwear: my winter coat is a thigh-length ultralight down topped with a blocktech raincoat, both from uniqlo. the raincoat is sleek in style lines and dresses up well. but i also love wearing my leather biker jacket with slightly more dressed up things. i think if you have outerwear you could wear into a nice restaurant or the theater, it helps you fit in and not feel self-conscious about being underdressed in nice spaces even if you’re on the casual side of your dressy closet. -I also have a chiffon kimono-style shawl or two. -things i’d like to add: chunky knit wool sweater in fun color, maybe with a sparkle or metallic in the yarn. shaggy 70s style fur coat. velvet or satin joggers (or in a similar shape as my linen pants) for being extra comfy but not looking like my day wear. wideleg culottes (shin length) with pleats in a structured fabric like a wool. over-the-knee boots (but comfy to walk/stand in). a silk floral print maxi dress you can see i focus a lot on fiber. how a “formal” outfit feels on, like temperature regulation, how well it breathes and moves on me and is it comfy is vertical important to me. and formal or dressy looks always look and feel better when the fabric itself is good quality. i can have a much easier time dressing up quickly and feeling like i look good but am still feeling comfy with separates like this; all-silk top and skirt could be gorgeous formal wedding guest outfit, but i can also put the same top with the nice jeans and still wear my vintage laceup boots and grab a jacket while looking like i made an effort for the theater or for drinks with a friend! i like to be able to dress up but it took me a while to figure out how to not feel like i was wearing a costume when i wanted to look fancy.
I think a good way to work with this is to take sillouhettes that you like and upgrade/fancify the fabric. Take your favorite cords and swap the fabric out for velvet, keeping the fit the same. Get a tee in a satiny fabric, or with piping in satin/velvet, or even just a more festive (however you define that) color. Find a cashmere blend in the shape of a sweatshirt you like. One of my favorite pieces is a blazer in sweatshirt material- super soft and cozy but the shape is still formal.
I recently found your channel and I’ve been loving binge watching your videos. I’ve been thinking about this a lot and I’ve realized I slip into different quadrants depending on my state of mind. When I was a child I loved theatrical clothing and even today as a 40 year old I find theatrical styles to be the most exciting to me. So I believe at my core I belong in the left up quadrant. However, when I feel less confident to show my authentic self, I can slip into dressing in the left down logic. And when I feel pressure from society to conform and be normal, I move into to the right up logic.
I feel similarly about slipping into different quadrants. Home is LD for me, but I have attempted to be many others, and when I am moving into a new phase/space I tend to work with RD logic and find a sort of uniform to ease my transition into the next phase. I just changed careers and went from wearing scrubs daily to office wear. Although I used LD logic to find comfortable and flattering separates, I used RD logic to make a sort of formula I could follow in the beginning phases when everything was overwhelming. If we tune in to this enough, I believe we could use the quadrants we are gravitating toward as sign posts to how confident and authentic we are feeling...
Welcome and I'm glad you're enjoying the videos 🌸 my perspective is thst we have a lot to gain by working with our "home quadrant" more, so it's not an obligation to always be your left up self but it can give you a lot to embrace that part of you
@@StyleThoughtsbyRita absolutely! It definitely was not intentional that I was dressing in an inauthentic way. I just think it’s interesting that, during times of my life that I struggled to feel like myself, I was subconsciously dressing in a way that masked my authentic self. It’s an interesting therapeutic exercise to pinpoint the correlation between my mental health and subconscious inauthentic styling. I definitely think you are onto something with this system!
This is so helpful rita! I recently realized that anything I have in my closet I will basically use because it will end up in my rotation since technically I “know” how to make an outfit - part of my problem is that I see the items as a challenge to make a fit with but even if I *can* doesn’t mean I *should*~~ this video really clarified for me what I need in my wardrobe and what I don’t
I think I've always been stuck in either insight or exploration. I like the idea of the integration phase, but I've honestly never been in it. I tend to get annoyed at my lack of satisfaction and I end up getting lazy about style. After I get fed up with being lazy with style, I end up trying to improve my style again and eventually I get lazy again. I honestly don't know if I'm in the insight or exploration phase. I comfortably use LU logic, but I'm not 100% sure on any archetypes. I want to be more Up, but I find it hard to know what Upness is supposed to look like on me. I feel uncomfortable in stereotypically Up or Glamourous looks even though I desperately want to be able to pull them off. I actually end up being more at ease in more unconventional looks even though I also want to be normal. I'm trying to find styles that actually feel good and exciting to wear. It's super satisfying for me to find stuff I actually like, but the process of trying new things is often challenging. I often end up feeling exhausted, overwhelmed and disoriented. It's often hard enough to find stuff that is wearable.
Rita, I feel like you're talking directly to me 😂 This info is very relevant to where I am in my style journey. Appreciate the gentle guidance and figurative head pats when you say it's normal to go through these cycles. Thank you!
I am a muse/ siren / lady heretic mix and have been exploring how far up and how far left I can go.When i get it right I get compliments and i know ive got it right and feel great but when i get it wrong, wow do i get bad feedback.. This has made me more nervous about the cycle but I think I just need to spend more time on it. I love Ritas system.
Great video as always ❤ My "something new" is sparkly and shiny nails and make up (I'm also a Sapphire) 💜 May I ask what eye shadow are you wearing, and is there some eyeshadow and nail polish that you recommend? 💅👀 Xo
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I love your energy Rita! You are a genius, thank you for sharing this with the world.
Hey! This is one of the leap members from the fall/winter leap course--if anyone is on the fence about taking it, I highly suggest you do. Taking it propelled me forwards in ways I didn't expect as someone who thought their style was already developed at the time of starting, and my coursemates were absolutely lovely and we had so many great discussions. You get out as much as if not more than you put in and it's so worth it for anybody looking for a safe space to talk about style without judgment and it's really just fantastic.
This video made me realise I'm in the integration phsase now and I achieved it just by adding very few seasonal pieces I felt I lacked and what actually contributed most to the feeling of contentment was decluttering my wardrobe according to Ruby logic. Finding new homes for the clothes that just weren't comfortable enough or didn't feel like me any more gave me so much joy and freed some physical and mental space for the clothes I actually like and want to wear ❤
Yayyyy new Rita video!! The way you think about and explain style has been so helpful for me.
As a ruby “outsider” I’m working on adding fancy/formal wear . I have a very boyish aesthetic and really struggle at formal attire. I feel like a clown or like I’m in costume when I go formal which feels really obvious this time of year. Really struggling to add dimension to my wardrobe. But I rock all jeans/cords/sweatshirts/tees. So I know what works for me just need to feel confident taking risks I guess???? I take a lot of inspiration from Kristen Stewart (even before discovering your style system). Hoping something resonates with me. So glad to have found your channel.
i don’t know if i’m an outsider, cool girl, or wildflower, but i have often felt the same. before i started working on my style recently, i often ended up underdressed at kind-of dressy events because i didn’t know what to wear and just put on my “uniform” to feel more comfortable and solve for decision fatigue (and which i think i look good in for casual wear), but i would feel uncomfortable once i got there because i didn’t like how i looked and felt like i was dressed totally inappropriately.
i have found so far in my work on my style that it’s been helpful to have a range of “dressy” clothes I really like so I can more easily choose the comfort level when getting dressed, but feel that all my choices are formal enough to not be looking like my everyday casual uniforms. my range includes:
-black skinny jeans that are very black and good quality/condition that I can pair with sparkly or sexier tops (instead of a t shirt or flannel button up that i would normally wear with jeans). these jeans i save for dressing sharp, unlike my other black skinny jeans that i’ll run errands in or wear in the garden or woodshop. i’d love to get another pair that’s like, waxed or something for a more attention-grabbing texture.
-full length silk maxi skirt. i actually made it, and recently dyed it from a dusty mauve pink to an indigo. beautiful washed silk twill sheen and floaty movement
-a brightly colored silk blazer. this was a thrift shop find. over a white t shirt, black jeans or joggers, it looks do nice but not too businessy, also not too fancy.
-skater skirt + tights, this can give a younger and fun “dresses up” look but it’s not super flashy and can a wide range of “dressing up” without looking like my casual clothes. i have a velvet one but would like other textures.
-tops: besides monochromatic sequin t shirts (i have white), i also have a fair amount of silk boxy tees (non stretch) and silk camisoles with patterns or prints or shine to them (those are a little sexier). these could pair with any of the bottoms above?
-outerwear: my winter coat is a thigh-length ultralight down topped with a blocktech raincoat, both from uniqlo. the raincoat is sleek in style lines and dresses up well. but i also love wearing my leather biker jacket with slightly more dressed up things. i think if you have outerwear you could wear into a nice restaurant or the theater, it helps you fit in and not feel self-conscious about being underdressed in nice spaces even if you’re on the casual side of your dressy closet.
-I also have a chiffon kimono-style shawl or two.
-things i’d like to add: chunky knit wool sweater in fun color, maybe with a sparkle or metallic in the yarn. shaggy 70s style fur coat. velvet or satin joggers (or in a similar shape as my linen pants) for being extra comfy but not looking like my day wear. wideleg culottes (shin length) with pleats in a structured fabric like a wool. over-the-knee boots (but comfy to walk/stand in). a silk floral print maxi dress
you can see i focus a lot on fiber. how a “formal” outfit feels on, like temperature regulation, how well it breathes and moves on me and is it comfy is vertical important to me. and formal or dressy looks always look and feel better when the fabric itself is good quality. i can have a much easier time dressing up quickly and feeling like i look good but am still feeling comfy with separates like this; all-silk top and skirt could be gorgeous formal wedding guest outfit, but i can also put the same top with the nice jeans and still wear my vintage laceup boots and grab a jacket while looking like i made an effort for the theater or for drinks with a friend! i like to be able to dress up but it took me a while to figure out how to not feel like i was wearing a costume when i wanted to look fancy.
I think a good way to work with this is to take sillouhettes that you like and upgrade/fancify the fabric. Take your favorite cords and swap the fabric out for velvet, keeping the fit the same. Get a tee in a satiny fabric, or with piping in satin/velvet, or even just a more festive (however you define that) color. Find a cashmere blend in the shape of a sweatshirt you like. One of my favorite pieces is a blazer in sweatshirt material- super soft and cozy but the shape is still formal.
@@meghanb1304 such great advice!
I recently found your channel and I’ve been loving binge watching your videos. I’ve been thinking about this a lot and I’ve realized I slip into different quadrants depending on my state of mind. When I was a child I loved theatrical clothing and even today as a 40 year old I find theatrical styles to be the most exciting to me. So I believe at my core I belong in the left up quadrant. However, when I feel less confident to show my authentic self, I can slip into dressing in the left down logic. And when I feel pressure from society to conform and be normal, I move into to the right up logic.
I feel similarly about slipping into different quadrants. Home is LD for me, but I have attempted to be many others, and when I am moving into a new phase/space I tend to work with RD logic and find a sort of uniform to ease my transition into the next phase. I just changed careers and went from wearing scrubs daily to office wear. Although I used LD logic to find comfortable and flattering separates, I used RD logic to make a sort of formula I could follow in the beginning phases when everything was overwhelming. If we tune in to this enough, I believe we could use the quadrants we are gravitating toward as sign posts to how confident and authentic we are feeling...
Welcome and I'm glad you're enjoying the videos 🌸 my perspective is thst we have a lot to gain by working with our "home quadrant" more, so it's not an obligation to always be your left up self but it can give you a lot to embrace that part of you
@@StyleThoughtsbyRita absolutely! It definitely was not intentional that I was dressing in an inauthentic way. I just think it’s interesting that, during times of my life that I struggled to feel like myself, I was subconsciously dressing in a way that masked my authentic self. It’s an interesting therapeutic exercise to pinpoint the correlation between my mental health and subconscious inauthentic styling. I definitely think you are onto something with this system!
Thank you! So helpful to conceptualize the style cycle! 💜
great video!
This is so helpful rita! I recently realized that anything I have in my closet I will basically use because it will end up in my rotation since technically I “know” how to make an outfit - part of my problem is that I see the items as a challenge to make a fit with but even if I *can* doesn’t mean I *should*~~ this video really clarified for me what I need in my wardrobe and what I don’t
I think I've always been stuck in either insight or exploration. I like the idea of the integration phase, but I've honestly never been in it. I tend to get annoyed at my lack of satisfaction and I end up getting lazy about style. After I get fed up with being lazy with style, I end up trying to improve my style again and eventually I get lazy again. I honestly don't know if I'm in the insight or exploration phase. I comfortably use LU logic, but I'm not 100% sure on any archetypes. I want to be more Up, but I find it hard to know what Upness is supposed to look like on me. I feel uncomfortable in stereotypically Up or Glamourous looks even though I desperately want to be able to pull them off.
I actually end up being more at ease in more unconventional looks even though I also want to be normal. I'm trying to find styles that actually feel good and exciting to wear. It's super satisfying for me to find stuff I actually like, but the process of trying new things is often challenging. I often end up feeling exhausted, overwhelmed and disoriented. It's often hard enough to find stuff that is wearable.
Rita, I feel like you're talking directly to me 😂 This info is very relevant to where I am in my style journey. Appreciate the gentle guidance and figurative head pats when you say it's normal to go through these cycles. Thank you!
💜💜💜 Thank you so much, this is the best type of comment to receive
I am a muse/ siren / lady heretic mix and have been exploring how far up and how far left I can go.When i get it right I get compliments and i know ive got it right and feel great but when i get it wrong, wow do i get bad feedback.. This has made me more nervous about the cycle but I think I just need to spend more time on it. I love Ritas system.
Well presented Rita! Having a model is very helpful. And your video editing is excellent!
Thank you so much 💜
Great video as always ❤ My "something new" is sparkly and shiny nails and make up (I'm also a Sapphire) 💜 May I ask what eye shadow are you wearing, and is there some eyeshadow and nail polish that you recommend? 💅👀 Xo
1:25 called me out lmao