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- čas přidán 27. 06. 2024
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Let's call it what it is, nobody is swiping on black men anymore. black men on the internet have ruined it for you guys. when the new Bumble statistics come out you guys will see .
WhO hUrT yOu?!?
What chu mean by we will see with bumble stats?
How are we ruining it if nobody is swiping on us?
Who would we ruin it for?
@@AbaNPreach guys i have recent comment on how the apps function in the a.i. and why people fuck up. It's not looks based. I think it could help people out, especially men - i can see at 8:00 how the OP of the video is getting messed up in his rank
Amara I reccomend you vet better so you can get a better partner or change your appearance on the app.
I've noticed myself certain photos give me certain attention. I also reccomend you'd find certain criteria so you won't have these problems again.
Hope you have a good day.
The people in the comments saying they would give him a chance or say he's not bad looking and all that, are the same people that would swipe left in under two seconds.
fax
They are. They are lying. It's kinda the same way you to a family gathering and your elders keep swearing you have a girlfriend when you already told them the last dozen family get togethers that you didnt.
Truer words have never been spoken
Virtue signaling
@@freshandfit3849 💀 ik y'all trolling but what y'all niggas doing here 🤣🤣
The whole reason why he is not with someone is because Tinder is literally all about how you look like. If Tinder was solely about personality and his thoughts I assure you most people would have dates by now. But it's gotta be said: Looks get you in the door, and personality makes you stay.
@@realty634 That is what my comment was about lol. He is not bad looking, but if his personality got him on the door and made him stay, then he would have a date.
Without looks, your personality doesn't matter.
@@realty634 with that grammar and spelling it sounds like you get ALL the ladies 😂
@@zak6093 it most definitely does cause if yr an asshole no one she wouldn’t like that
@@jazioxmugen 🤣🤣
a woman told me today that she met her husband in a chat room back in the day before social media. She said they probably would have passed each other by if they were brought together by their physical appearance alone
Exactly!!!
that would be the exception not the rule. back in the day aol local chats were my jam for meeting new people, cus of the work I do in field service. after that it was myspace.. and after that died I finally broke down and started going to clubs and bars... its really just all the same shit
So she was saying her hubby is fugly?
chat rooms, literally like idk social medias that aren't "face focused" i.e. twitter, niche interests and websites, if you're willing to actually explore for the potential person in mind literally specific spaces on reddit or discord or any similar forum / modern "chatroom" based medias -- these can build so many more genuine friendships, bonds, and even more, than dating apps imo. i would avoid dating apps and look to them as a last resort, instead i'd get creative atmospherically irl or online, even if it makes me nervous. but do so with safety and caution, always. withhold your trust in any scenario
I would pass on my partner too and I've seen his Tinder profile before we started dating because we were friends. It was awful, we laughed about it.
"your standards are too high" I been saying that, with my male/female friends who start complaining about not getting matches, I call them out on it because I hear them every day talking about it. You DO get matches but the matches are not up to your standards, but you can't sit there and expect an 8+ person to look past your looks and value your personality when you yourself are not even doing that. I had one friend who is over weight and they wanted a really fit partner, because "that's just what I'm attracted to, I shouldn't have to lower my standards, I want what I want" and in the SAME breathe they complained how that fit person didn't match them and complained how it's not fair, "they aren't even giving me a chance" while there was someone else less attractive hitting them up and they said "I mean, they are ok but I'm not attracted to them, so they just have to respect that" blows my mind every time.
That’s not exactly true. I’ve swiped on people that were ugly and rarely got anything from them. Now I didn’t actually want them I just was trying to experiment with the app but still. I’m not complaining personally like just move on but just being honest.
Bruh, you do realize that most men actually mass swipe right on everyone, right? That logic only works on women.
most guys swipe all the girls right just to get any match
@@metadata5760 I hear guys bitch all the time, it's not about swiping right on everything, hook ups are a dime a dozen, it's finding one they actually want to date. The one they like isn't interested so they bitch about it, then hook up with someone they think is below them just get a quick nut. Rinse and repeat.
Standard are for ppl with options
Bruh... I never had any Tinder matches, EVER. But, somehow, I ended up being married to a beautiful woman, OUTSIDE of tinder. Take it from me gents, Tinder isn't everything.
What does your wife's boyfriend think?
Men especially shouldn't use online dating as the end all be all.
I get a matches here and there still no dates but I prefer meeting women in social settings like dance classes.
@@pit3bull360 exactly 👌
@@torachan23 doesn't exist
Yo that's crazy. As your wifes boyfriend I have to disagree though sorry bud.
Bruh...this is why I hate dating apps. I'm 6 foot 4 and relatively good looking. I would maybe get a match a week TOPS and they would NEVER respond. Tinder and Bumble are the worse. Hinge is a bit better, but overall, STOP using apps and go meet women in public
If you had issues at 6’4” the rest of us don’t stand a chance. Love your channel Josh!
I don't look good, but in person, I get way better results. Oh, and my buddy is just like you, tall, good looking, he barely gets matches also.
im 5"8 and get like 5 matches a week but 2-3 usually goes ghost lol
The girls are on seeking arrangements now.
Sometimes your vibe and personality don't translate through photos.
I'm so glad I've been with my wife since I was 16(40 now). I couldn't imagine being in the dating scene with how society makes men feel. You gotta have the stars and moon while a woman doesn't have earth dirt and you're the one that has to "prove" yourself
@I come in peace indeed
wow you're so lucky. that is blessing
Sir, men have never allowed women to come to the table with nothing.
Now that women are asking for what men have never feared requiring from a woman, men are pissy.
I always had a horrible time online dating. Terrible for self esteem.
But I went to the gym every day and had a cute personal trainer. But she had already kinda “gave up” on dating because she ended up dating some horrible people.
Because of that I was sad and pretty also “gave up” looking for a girl. So I was really open with my trainer, and wasn’t shy and actually acted like myself and we became really good friends and really liked each other, and that alone was all it took for me to find out that she also liked me.
She made the first move on me, and now 6 and a half years later we’ve been married for 6 years.
So it’s not the worst thing to try to meet girls without the intention of dating them, just make friends with the ones that have the same interests as you and and hobbies as you. Then when you get to know them you may find that one/a few of them would be a great match for you, and maybe you’ll find out some of the girls you like might also not be someone you’d match well with.
These dudes speaking facts 🙌🙌🙌🙌 I’ve have so much growth since then it’s ridiculous much love to y’all
Completly agree! Their friendship is so wholesome!
Hey Jon, followed you since 10k on tiktok. Keep it up
Wishing you all the best in life, your honesty is refreshing.
Aye it’s Jon! Glad you’re having better results. I enjoy your content.
Yeah
Now THIS is how you help out young men in the dating game. Giving them a solution is way better than just turning them against the opposite sex and being toxic. Keep going guys 🙏🏾
This is exactly what red pill content is.
@@21nitsua which one, the self improvement or the women hating?
" turning them against the opposite sex and being toxic". the fuq you talking about? no one is turning sad men, they turn themselves because they cant rationalize aggression and sexuality. Its just exploited biology.
@@Kilooma no one is promoting hate for women. Sometimes it's disrespectful, Sometimes it's just facts and logic. But it's always about self improvement and accountability. The problem seems to be telling women to be accountable for their part of the dysfunction.
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
You guys are the bigger brothers I wish I had when I was working this out for myself.
It was a long road, chewy as it sounds the key take away was always self acceptance. Then you can appreciate that others feel and accept how they want. Sometimes your seen in favour. Sometimes your not - not much you can do about that. But you can kick with the wind. Play to your strengths.
Remember hot or not?? I was consistently rated as a 6 to a 9, this is based on aesthetics of the face alone.
I managed to get onto a site where people vote you on, it was called Darwin dating.
That didn’t translate in the real world because like it was said above, I had interest but from people I deemed below my station. Looking back, none of them were bad, I’d go back in time and kick myself in the shins and potentially a good hiding. The only thing that stunk was my arrogance, my ineptitude and my lack of awareness and understanding.
I took up hobbies and worked on myself for years, when I decided I wasn’t about trying to please anyone else and just please myself, the offers came in. I went on more dates. Some crashes and burned, some went ok, some went well - the key take away is I got experiences of company, social situations and more importantly, got to eat some great food and went to places I might not have gone to other wise.
I know I’m waffling, but if there’s one thing, if it even helps anyone out there.
Just enjoy life. Your not as ugly as you think you are. One place of happiness is another man’s place of misery. Get out there and live for you, that someone will come along on an idle Tuesday when your doing something inane - now, what you gonna do? Focus on what might go wrong? No, focus on what potentially could go right and live in the moment. Don’t take it so personally. Appreciate the opportunity cause one day, you might not have it.
WHY is so many men STUCK on TINDER!? 😮
There are many OTHER dateing sites, that work better.
And also: approach women IRL!
Dating apps were designed with two goals:
1. To lure men into paying money for premium membership in the hopes of getting matches.
2. To boost the ego of women and make them think they are all celebs.
And also, before you say that meeting women in real life is easier, oh yes, it is! But remember, those same women in real life are also on the dating apps
It failed the second goal. Just makes us feel overwhelmed.
Meeting women IRL is also inherently risky, especially post-Me Too with the stigma around approaching women being construed by Feminists as sexual harassment.
At least on a dating app, there's an inherent assumption that everyone on the platform has already consented to romantic approaches / sexual advances.
I don’t agree. I know plenty of women in real life not on dating apps. It’s not the same girls on dating apps. Maybe girls that go to bars and clubs on the dating app. Change your circle and activities for a different type of girl.
@@alayhaferron1972 You just proved that you can never be happy, one way or another.
@@truthteller8965 not true. It a lot better in real like. But on dating apps a personally difficult. I can’t date, sort or get to know 30 guys at once. It sounds nice until you experience it. You can’t actually meet people like that.
These guys are pretty spot on about their analysis of the online dating world. I'm at 5 or 6, at best. rarely got matches and the few I did get never responded. So, I picked up going to the gym, got into good shape, started changing the way I looked, but most importantly... I stopped caring so much. I noticed, going to the bars, hanging out with friends, etc, girls were starting to talk to me when I was just having fun with no expectations except to have a good time(without a female as the priority). Seriously, guys, try not to care about it so much and act like you. Even if it's nerdy or corny.
When you don't care as much, you don't look needy. Desperation and neediness are a cold shower to a woman.
I would agree with that. In a sense, I've kinda stopped caring about actually getting a woman, but I know that in most social things with people I don't know (coworkers or family), whether it's a man or woman, I feel like I'm either too aggressive in talking (when it does happen), or I just work to project not an air of uncaring but an air of "literally do not talk to me, period". I can say "it's what I want, anyways", sure, but sometimes I feel like I struggle with a "need" to talk to others that goes against that projection. It doesn't help I don't try to do social outings or anything because "I don't have any hobbies they like and I don't think I'll really care about hobbies they like".
But hey, at least I've never used a single dating app in my life! The only reason I would is to make sure other people I know won't take jokes about making profiles for me seriously and actually do it.
"I started going to the gym, and quit caring"
Ignoring how what you said makes literally zero sense, from any perspective...
So much so, that it's an obvious fucking lie.........
>.>
Just, keep in mind - a male's "prime" ends before 30, and hers begins half a decade later.
So, if you met a chick... based on how she'd approach you at a bar.... because of how you don't give AF, and only "don't" care about going to the gym...
You _definitely_ don't get to pretend that it's an example of a healthy, lasting, relationship.
I'm 6'2" and have had multiple friends refuse to have new ladies meet me, until they'd been dating for 2 whole months... because of how their other lady friends reacted to meeting me.
(Remember that video of the loser trying to reign in "his" girl, after she leapt onto that Chad - a week ago???)
To say nothing of the pharmacistS that have reached through the tiny window, to play with my hair - while I was there picking up literal anti-biotics...
(I have weak lungs, and am very susceptible to shit like bronchitis )
I promise, what you're describing has little-no meaning, for the average guy - and never will.
The only thing that changed, was their willingness to approach you - specifically.
Right. I have no problem at all meeting men. All I do is ... Do Me. It's so simple. I go to places and events I would enjoy. I go for walks. I try new things. And I meet like minded people. I get to know them in a public place. Then take it from there. It's very simple.
Also not being a sweaty intel if it doesn’t work out. I met my current gf through a tinder date that didn’t work out. But me and tinder date stayed friends and she introduced me to my now girlfriend.
I was on Tinder for over a year, didn't get a single match. All the females in my family said the same shit, "Oh you just need better pictures" "You just need a better bio" "you just need to put money into it for it to work." Meanwhile I watched all my friends get matches like it wasn't a big deal. Eventually I figured it out, to quote a well known outlaw, "I have an unfortunate face." Got off of Tinder because what little self esteem I had was in the shitter. Eventually, I did get a girlfriend without any social media intervention. If I can do it, so can you brothers.
Yes, they are hypocrites. This type of sentence only serves to ease one's conscience and women love that.
Don't listen to their words, look what their boyfriend/husband looks like.
How did u get a girl
@@superboyprime4893 .
The grass isn't always greener on the other side too. I'm an average looking woman. And I get lots of matches on Tinder. Why ? Because guys swipe on every profile, they don't even read or even look at the profile.
So for example I might get 70 matches in a day, but only get 10 messages from those matches. And out of the 10 messages only 2 are interested in going on a date. The other 8 are just looking for a hookup. And out of the 2 who are interested on a date with you, you find out that all 2 of them have baggage (e.g they have children' or have mental issues or don't have a stable job or have a criminal past).
So yeah, Tinder is only paradise for women who are looking for a hookup with an attractive guy. But it's a nightmare for women who are looking for a relationship.
How’d u do it? Also, good on u for still being here on this planet brother. Big hugs to you cuz
In a lot of cases, your love life really boils down to just not being in the right place at the right time. There are so many factors outside one's control that falling into the redpilly habit of blaming others (or falling into the blackpill pit of blaming others *and oneself* ) is especially destructive.
All you have to do is accept what you are and what you have. Note that I meant "accept" and not "resign", everyone of you has intrinsic value and it must be acknowledged wholeheartedly along with your flaws.
On the other hand, comparisons are sometimes inevitable. Rather than avoiding comparing yourself to others at all costs, I suggest it's better to change the scope and compare your former self to your present-day self. If you cringe at a picture of you during your teenage years, that's a very good sign you are capable of becoming better and better.
As for the dating market, know that you can only control so much. Maybe you find someone, maybe you don't. Coming to terms with this uncertainty is key.
I think most men don't have what it takes to be in a healthy long term relationship... This goes for even social media inlfluencers etc... It takes a hell of a lot to entertain women and always make them organically laugh and keep them interested in you especially with the amount of options they have. We overlook this because a woman can show literally no other positive quality other than looking good so men don't feel like hey should have to be something special
@Camron Lummus Sucks to be you.. This is a rare thing obviously for a woman to just straight up lie about that... I am sure there were red flags you didn't pick up on.. I feel you though. If the dating market was fair, you would have been able to get a better quality partner, and this wouldn't of happened to you.. this is 100% true
@Camron Lummus that's why as a man you shouldn't fall for the "lower your standards" bs that normies spew. we men already have low enough standards in general
It's kind of like when you want something so bad that you lose focus on what really matters
There is nothing LESS attractive than DESPERATION. Aba's advice for these guys to practice interacting with women without having an end game in mind was really good advice. If these guys would do that they might be surprised to find that a girl or two might start showing them some attention.
Chicken v egg. IF they had real confidence, those conversations never would have happened. They don't really believe they can get someone else easily and it shows.
@@TheRealNickG I believed I could dunk doesn't mean it happened
Let me tell you, if you're not attractive physically, it doesn't matter what you do or how you act. Also, consider the numbers: there is not anywhere near the number of single women than there are single men, meaning that men no matter what are doomed to fail and this has a knockback effect that makes women even more entitled because they have far more options at their disposal. Men not so much, and when you realize that you become desperate because you're fighting against literally everything. At that point the world is against you, no hyperbole needed. Men are against you, women are against, the entire society is your enemy. And people wonder why people like ER and AM and JD emerge.
@@danieljliverslxxxix1164 Why are you so bent on justifying that warped outlook with numbers that are patently false. There are a few more women because men live harsher lives on average, but the number of women generally is (roughly) the same as men, all other things being equal (looking at you China). And even where that's not true, guaranteed that money talks and your BS about looks walks. You are desperate and don't know anything about women, so you can't decide if it is their fault for you not being good looking or being rich so you just blame your weirdness and awkwardness on them. Apparently, you didn't get the message that the day one lesson is to never come off as desperate. Don't worry about the rest of it as long as that is true. As long as you believe that in your heart of hearts THAT is the stink that women smell all over you. I've known poor and ugly men who by your logic have no chance, be rather successful. I've known women who were the same.
@@ichoosemysanity6467 Good analogy, since that has come up for me recently. I can't dunk right now, but I made a concerted effort to train to be able to touch the rim. Done. By your logic, if we were intended to fly by our nature, we would have been born with wings. I'm saying that if a man's grasp isn't greater than his reach, then what's the point of anything?
Nobody is saying that anyone can do anything. That's obviously not true and also silly, as you pointed out. I'm saying that people who subscribe to that are using the excuse of the couple of things that they can't do interfere with their judgements about their own life and potential.
"Not everyone is going to end up with someone"
What a depressing note to end on...
Sounds like my story 🤣
hard but true
Truth hurts lol.
Making me feel anxious
Rules of nature. Wind blows, rain falls.
This is why I don't like the concept of online dating and will never try it, it just seems so forced to me. Everyone knows why they're there, and it feels strange to browse through a catalogue of profiles and go "that one!". Like you mentioned, people just need to talk to women without an ulterior motive and get comfortable doing it. The person that you click with might be someone you'd pass on normally. The last time I was dating someone was 10 years ago in my early twenties, where I was trying too hard and being weird, now I've learned to be content working on myself, and whatever happens, happens. Women can easily sniff out when a guy is being desperate.
I remember how I was when I was younger and man this dude gave flashbacks. Update: he seems better now. I follow him on TikTok and the dude can sing he has music on Spotify and Apple. So it seems he's getting there slowly but surely wins the race.
Guy needs to ditch his “friend zone “ really work on himself internally and externally . Level up for himself . Then watch the shifts happen within his life .
Totally agree, needs to stop giving a f... and grow some balls.
@@WrathofFenrir99 💯 when you're crap at a sport and want to make the team you don't just say "the rules are all wrong" and continue being trash. You train hard, improve your technique and body & just get better
@@DrAlchem01 that's lowkey a good analogy
He already is working externally. And internally he seems alright, he is self aware and humorous. he jsut needs to display more confidence. Im autistic as fuck, even so ive gotten to fuck people through rationalization. If you wanna pull off "self deprecation and i dont care about anything" you really need to actually not care or else its cringe as fuck.
I say that because most of these guys i imagine have some form of autism or other.
@@zenfae8373 not really, sports have a technique and the constant for work will never change. Which is the sport.
Dating has too many variables and every person is unique and an individual. If that's not the case then dating coaches, tutors, and self study would work. You are training to hit a moving target.
Dude is not ugly. He's not someone you see and go "Goddamn you fine." or anything either but I think yall are right. He needs to interact with women in real life because they need to get to know him to be attracted. I just hope he isn't the type to IMMEDIATELY go into a spiel about how no one likes him when he meets someone. Awkward can be kinda cute, but that's different than appearing like you have extremely low confidence.
Thats the catch 22 tho. In order to want to get to know someone, there has to be some level of visual attraction. Average guys like him are insta friendzoned or dismissed before he says a word.
@@king_outrage2328 That's not true in my experience. I have met plenty of men I was indifferent about appearance wise and through getting to know him and becoming "friends" first I grew attracted to them. That's only an issue when you are unattractive, not really when you're just average.
@@king_outrage2328 not only that but try feigning self confidence after hundreds of rejections. It's possible but not easy.
@@king_outrage2328 unless he has some serious game and let’s be brutally honest here, this generation of men are lacking in game for good reason, post metoo and all that.
Just dropping into say your profile name is great
Aba speaking the truth!!! Stay on your level! I literally had a friend who only swiped on gym rats, but she wasn’t ‘into’ fitness. She was passing up guys that would be more her ‘type’.
Can I just say that the guy who is the subject matter of this video, I used to be exactly like him. I used to be profoundly sad about not being able to match with anyone on these dating apps, and the longer that I stayed on these apps the more hurt I got. It used to occupy my mind on a daily basis, the fact that I was in my late 20's and hadn't gotten a date yet, let alone be in a relationship. This was also the time when the MeToo movement was really strong in the media, and some of the vitriol that that movement was encouraged or helped putout was very strong, particularly on Twitter, Reddit etc. It caused me to become really depressed, I'd have suicidal and intrusive thoughts throughout the day of every day, and I got angry or sad over trivial things. I also had irregular sleep cycles too. However, things began to get better when I started to seek psychiatric help, and I was put on an antidepressant over a number of months. So I just wanted to let people who are in a similar situation as him, that how you feel and what you are going through is not something unique, and that you're not a failure, and MOST importantly things do get better.
They don't always get better. For many it just gets worse.
notice how your situation didn't get better you just got prescribed a highly addictive drug that ruins your hormonal profile for the rest of your life
"Just take meds to survive the modern dating hellscape"
Okay so now I have to cope with anti depressants and psychology. Doesn't seem bright world to me
@@yahudi7253You're the one calling it a cope
There is a way out of the Friendzone, Stop being their Friend. Additionally, Make sure they are actually your Friend in the first place. A true Friend doesn't only hit you up when they need something.
Its better to state your intentions at the start
@@principalitycidade4323 I agree. You should not befriend someone you want to Bang. The sooner people learn this lesson the Better.
@@TheParasoulja thats right
@@TheParasoulja I disagree I have a lot of female friends that I would smash, dosent mean u should actively try and or try to get in a relationship with them
Absolutely. Ive had a few guys after seeing me date other guys ask me would they date me. I told them if they had approached me as a suitor I would have but they came to me as a friend so I treated them as such
Every member of Fresh and Fits' audience would benefit so much more from THIS type of advice that you guys gave.
Facts
Aba gets his booty tickled by his wife🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@@GroupKillingFrenzy Damn, you really got that incel energy going for you!
Why would you think that Fresh and Fit wouldn't give this advice? They also help with online profiles and Myron will give unfiltered truths.
@@TakeshiInazuma Those guys are nothing without the bit of clout and money they have. The women who are around them are using them. You can smell their false bravado and insecurity through the screen
I gotta say, I tune in sometimes to watch y'all's comedy and whatnot, but the videos you guys make for young men are really special. You can tell you guys really care and that kid probably needed to hear something like this
Ong
Imma share my own experience being on both sides of this spectrum. Fresh outta high school I was unconfident, lanky, awkward, and I couldn't talk to people. But I took college as a time to reinvent myself, and I talked to everyone I could, I started tutoring to make money and meet people, and went to collegiate events. Two years of struggling through that I could talk to anyone and I even had some girls I went out with and dated. Then I met a girl online and dated her for two years. It's all about becoming someone who feels complete by yourself before you can give off the vibes that the opposite sex wants.
As a disabled guy, this shit is even worse. The rejection and feeling of not being good enough doesn't stop when I turn off my phone. Everytime I go outside I constantly hear comments about my disability, people making jokes about me (like I can't hear them), people Asking their friends if they would date a blind person, etc.
Now it doesn't stop me from going out and enjoying life but god does it hurt when it feels like everyone around me doesn't take me seriously as a person.
Tyrese, you a real King! Just live life as you said and focus on YOURSELF and your loved ones. Slowly but surely everything will fall in order.
Now I have to be honest. I would be lying right now if I would say that I haven't laughed at my friends joking about someone that is disabled. Reading about how such things ruins you mentally got me checking myself for once (for real, not in a fake way if you know what I mean). Appreciate you sharing this, cause we gotta share our experiences so that we can learn from each other. Bless up my guy!🙏
that shit pisses me off. my best friend has treacher collins syndrome. Im his friend, and as a friend why would I notice anything like that, to me he is just my friend. but the amount of times that I heard people talking shit about him right next to him used to get me in a lot of fights. Ironically he is the one who got me to stop, he said he was ok with it, and that is also sad, that he was so used to it he learned to ignore it, but better that I guess than breaking peoples noses like I did.
Keep your head up,stay strong my G.
I hope the right one comes cause man’s rejection is God’s protection. If they laugh or joke on you, they ain’t ish and they are trash.
This makes me sad because just because you’re blind doesn’t mean you’re unattractive wtf
I'm average height, decent looking on a good day, and i am fit. Online dating did nothing for me, and i consider myself to be far more attractive than this guy. Deleting tinder, okcupid, bumble, all that shit was the best decision I have ever made. Get off. They are speaking truth. Go out and find hobbies. My dating life aint much better, but its better than sitting on fucking tinder.
EDIT: And what Aba n Preach are saying about homeboy ruining his own mentality, thats true. If you get rejected and it hurts you that bad and you dont want to be friends, then dont be friends. Cut it off. You obviously dont care enough to be friends anyways. So why are you holding onto something that wont be? Dont lie to yourself guys. Learn when you need to cut people off for your own good.
Facts men need to make a mass exodus from dating apps, they are a waste of time for most men. Go out there and experience life and deal with women in real life. There is nothing like going to a woman in public and shooting your shot,
Unless you're the in the top 10% in looks, Tinder is mostly futile.
@@kidkid985 Lol, Tinder or IRL, it's same
@@bababamooo906 yea but your best bet is to go up to a woman and shoot your shot rather than wait for an average looking women to choose you. Either way it’s a gamble
Based on my personal experience and what I hear (from friends, social media, etc), all online dating apps are superficial. Some more than others. Its mostly for the most extremely attractive drop dead gorgeous guys, and some average looking guys. And even then it's not a guarantee for the average looking guy. Despite nowhere near being considered ugly
It's not only what you guys talked about but also the simple fact that a LOT of people nowadays have absolutely zero personality because they get all their worldviews and ethics from a very select group (mostly online) and are afraid to venture beyond that. Trust me, nothing is easier than having a fulfilling conversation with someone when you actually give a shit.
During lockdown things got a little rough, but once I was able to go back out and flex my social skills I was able to meet more women. It's okay to step out of your comfort zone and face rejection. It's going to happen, but do one favor for yourself, stop having expectations from the women you meet. Just be you and eventually the right person will find you. But that dating site shit doesn't really work for most guys.
It doesn't work for this girl either. 😄 Yet I continue to subject myself to the torture that is Bumble.🤦🏼♀️
@@SouthernSera 😂 True. I think it’s only worked for one person I know but her relationship is still new.
Maybe share your experience as well. Where are you meeting women? What kind of environments?
You couldn't pay me to be in my 20s again, especially not in today's dating climate. The fact that a guy like this is getting passed up shows me how skewed people's expectations and perceptions have become.
Everyone gets to see the perfect image on social media, and a lot of these people on dating apps assume that they're so special, they deserve nothing but the "best". This trend is only going to get worse, because the way social media is set up, people are all about one upping each other. In turn expectations will just keep rising. No one on these apps stop to think whether it's realistic, they're all about this "self confidence", "you go girl/guy", "you deserve better" bullshit, until either they burn out or their perspective becomes so warped they become the people who put out the "Where have all the good men gone" videos.
I'd actually love to go back to my 20's with the knowledge I have now at 40. But not without that.
he's kinda average.
If your a woman even an average woman, this literally will not happen to you, trust me. The average Woman are in demand way more than th average man. Women have a huge advantage in dating so this won't effect you.
@@adrianramirez6848 Is there anything wrong with being physically average? Average is not unattractive. It's simply having features that are similar to the majority of people or neither particularly unattractive or attractive. I fail to see why average has become some horrible word. I don't mind being average. I don't like someone calling me 'average' in a dismissive/insulting manner, they really mean "ugly" when average and ugly are not at all the same thing by their literal dictionary definitions. Most people are fucking average, including you, Adrian. Some people will find you beautiful, some will find you ugly as hell. Generally, people will probably not a particularly strong opinion of your appearance in general. Or it will be influenced greatly by your individual interactions with people.
Very true! I've never had a chance on tinder or bumble for almost 2 years realising I'm not photogenic and I don't win at first impression with the opposite sex, I just stop trying to hard and decided to try other ways without setting a high expectation and doing what I'm interested in. Once I started focusing on myself , going for Open Mics and join an Improv Club, meeting people in events eventually I started dating and finally met my wife, we're married 3 years now. So yeah I can relate with what Abba and Preach are saying.
Congrats. I don’t know you but glad it all worked out for you 🙌🏽
These guys in the videos who get no matches
Need Myron to yell at them to go to gym and build up some muscle.
Self pity is a disease
@@basicLife7721 plus homie literally working at a gym 2
@@questionablemarks5148 😂 I just caught that
I get matches on tinder. Problem is either chicks get easily bored with the texting and stop responding, or the female is a fucking catfish when we meet up. The later is 75% of the outcome. I still smash if she is ok, but I ghost after a while even though she has a cool personality. Being on dating apps made me realise how much females catfish...and dont give a damn u would eventually find out.
I have watched this video a couple times. And you guys are correct. But as someone who has felt trapped in my routine at different times in my life, it’s hard to go out. It sounds crazy to even write that, but these dudes have their routine, and this life they have created for themselves hasn’t had the results they thought it would. And it is scary to go do something new. So if someone sees this video, and you read this, and you feel trapped in your life. Please just go do new things. And hopefully I will do the same, and we will all become better people, and find that special girl to go through life with.
I’ll be honest, I used the whole “then you should date me” line. But in a different context. I didn’t say it to actually get these women to date me, I used it to get them to shut up about my dating preferences. Long story short, I was accused of hating my race “for reasons that was never made clear” so I used that line to get them to stfu. Assume all you want in your head, but don’t come at me with unfounded accusations.
Brilliant strategy, my man!
let me guess, your dating preference is white women
@@theONE-ws8lh if you talk to the black women who rejected me, that’s what they will tell you. But if you are asking me specifically then no, not exactly. I just don’t exclusively date blank women. I’m not going to limit my options any longer when my immediate dating pool has already rejected me. If I’m going to build a family, then ethnicity is not something I’m too concerned with at the moment when just finding a woman to build a relationship with in any capacity is hard enough
Can't wait for the comments like ,,aww he's cute, any girl would be happy to have him'' but actually not referring to themselves 😂
Ikr 😐
Bunch of sluts tbh
I don't know why people think that's helpful, especially if you're friends. Saying things you don't mean and then acting like I'm the bad guy for asking why you don't date me now that you've decided to tell me you would, that's helpful?
Especially if the advice they give you is that you have to get to know people instead of swiping on apps. Well, we got to know each other, now you're the one who decided to tell me that you'd date me, except you wouldn't, actually. What am I supposed to think here?
You may as well say nothing if that's all you have.
As a Gen X'er I will sum it up for you:
"Go outside and play."
Top comment crazy how a full generation lost that
The world has changed people have changed. Go to the gym go the park go to the library go the coffee shop. Most people do not want to talk to you. If they do talk to you it will be short and brief. I know that some people do want to talk.
you damn right
Facts.
Most Women don't wanna be bothered "outside". That's antiquated Advice, sir.
Watching this video reminds of something that my father said years ago when I was younger teen (25 now) that stuck with me.
People or human beings in general are selfish creatures and this selfishness gets more and more profound as time continues as to what I’ve observed so far. Rarely you would see a selfless person these days helping with something, expecting nothing in return, just purely of heart.
You (as a guy) could be someone’s free meal ticket, free ride, free rent, free attention and validation etc. etc.
Knowing that do not be a selfish, heartless person in return, but do be very mindful of your surroundings and know how to navigate through those situations(Adapt).
What’s wild is that dude works AT a gym and could start working on himself for FREE
No one cares about your muscles lol
Gym doesn’t get you girls.
If you're hitting the gym to get women, you're there for the wrong reason. Because as soon as you meet someone, you're gonna lose that motivation in the gym. If you go, go for yourself. Go to make yourself feel better about yourself. Go to be better for yourself. And never change that motivation.
Get off the apps. Tinder isn't a dating app, it's a hookup app. People need to go out in the real world and build REAL connections with people, that's how you grow as a person. They sound socially awkward so they need to expose themselves to more social interactions. I was socially awkward until I pushed myself to talk to people. It's not wonder why so many more people are socially awkward in an age where people live a huge amount of their lives online.
that's the problem though dude lol we're all at home 24/7 now
@@chrispapadopoulos3080 exactly, hard to meet new people when everybody wearing a mask and social distancing from one another.
It's the only way to truly meet people
@@JonBlack413 I live in the United States … absolutely no one (under 55) is wearing a mask nor social distancing
@@user-eu3uy9pt8p So do I and I live in NYC.
I love how weve manufactured a society that disadvantages an average/below average guy in almost every important aspect of life but then act all surprised when they start spouting hardcore redpill/blackpill shit
Facts, I'm just dumbfounded by their lack of self awareness. Society wants to silence the pain and suffering of men who are ugly. No one gives a shit.
But isn’t that life though ? Life is never going to be “fair” for everyone. Unless you are for forcing women to date men they aren’t attracted to… and if that’s the case is society going to force men to date women they don’t want also ? Gotta be fair for everyone lol 😂
Well the average guy needs to stop being a wimp and this pathetic self pitying. As for the ladies, I hope they humiliate them because unfortunately, it's the only way they will learn to STOP being desperate for a woman's validation... and sometimes not even that is enough. There are many more things to life than women, if all types of men focused on other things, society would quickly fall into normality again because women would not survive without the attention.
IG and OF would collapse within weeks, the toxicity would decrease drastically and overall, it would re-balance the entire relationship structure between men and women.
Preach 🖤🖤🖤🖤 The game is beyond rigged against us. Blackpilled until the day I die
@@thewrongshoes What do you mean "fair"? Society is encouraging lookism and people act like it doesn't exist, especially for men.
I don't see you people spouting "isn't that life though" bs when a woman is rejected by a man because of her physical attributes like weight, instead y'all blame men for being fatphobic and shame the man for his choices.
I've given up on online dating, everybody that matched me is just trying to steal my credit card. I've had like two conversations with people who arent scam artists.
I'm happy that I'm asexual and that I'm okay with just having a small circle of people I actually can stand to fuck with on a regular basis.
It's sad that so many people want that kind of love, that more than friends kind of love, and yet never find it. Or even think they'll ever find it.
It hurts to think about, cause I know what it feels like to feel rejected/unworthy/unwanted, but I've never felt it on the let's be more than friends level. It sounds painful AF, and having seen more than a couple of close family members deal with that pain, I know it's not something people can just get over and get back out there and try again.
💜💜💜🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿
Asexual and aromantic aren't the same. The romance is what we're talking about here but sounds like ur both
I was the "guy friend" for a bunch of girls and I didn't have any interest in dating them or anything else.
They liked my honesty and the straight answers but being their chaperone during underwear shopping made me ask if they thought I was gay.
Answer: Yes they did. Because I never dated girls or tried to hit on them, made them think I was gay.
It didn't even occur to them that I wasn't interested cause we were friends.
I lost alot of friends (some had been my friends since the age of 5, I was 24 at that time) when that happened and they blamed me for not being what they thought I was.
Wtf
I've had girls assume I was gay for the same reason. Still friends with them though
Thank-you!!! The projection is too fuckin' Real out Here! People don't assume I'm Gay, but I feel ya Pain.
Put some clown hair etc on yourself. You are the meme
@I come in peace They blame him for not being gay and not being clear about his orientation, when really it was their fault for assuming anything in the first place.
Moral of the story: leave online dating!
Get involved into things you love doing and you’ll meet people and make friends. Sometimes friendships become relationships and sometime they don’t but you might meet the one through other friendships. Always be yourself and put yourself out there. The longer you hide and shy away from people the more you deny yourself the opportunity to meet possible relationships.
this is honestly great advice, hands down.
The problem you can end up with is that because women can get dates easily through online dating they don't care or at worst get offended if people try to ask them out at social settings like a bar etc
Women can get laid easily through online dating if they choose to make themselves easily available like that. There's still the same ratio of men and women as before.
Girls with an inflated ego do yes. Not all of us are garbage like that lol. I personally would like to go out to a bar and get to know my date. It’s a casual easy going setting
These online dating apps have made women act very entitled, because guys will call any girl they see beautiful and act all desperate.
@@cherryhazard8002 I agree the vast majority of women have an inflated ago because of that, but it makes it easy to avoid them. Take it from a b, those girls are a one nighter at best 😬
@@cherryhazard8002 let them weed themselves out. Saves you the trouble! Lol
There's a whole ass difference between not being someone's type and not being Tinder/Bumble's type. Y'all gotta keep in mind these dating apps in themselves have incredibly high standards for dudes that 90% of us will never reach.
Also, men take terrible pictures (on average).
I think it depends on location too because I’m not the best looking dude and I’m a bit out of shape but I pulled 36 likes in 2 months being up north. Dude in the vid is in Cali and I’m sure there is a whole lot of competition in the dating market there.
@@oz_jones yea because we aren't female or gay
Meh, I have equal luck in both the real work and online... That is too say none despite putting all the effort in that is supposedly what gets you somewhere
Honestly, tinder is reflection of people's real self. People exposes what they're really like behind avatars like social media. That's why you also find that people can be more talkative when their chatting compared to when you talk to them in real life. So as much as tinder is not a real place, it also a place where people show their real selves.
Exactly. That's why I never did that online dating shit. I always find my relationships naturally in life. It takes time but it brings more meaning to the relationship than just swiping on a screen. I wish mah man gets a gal. Good luck brotha.
This exact thing happened to a mate, ruined his self esteem but getting offline helped him
Getting no matches is actually hella common. And no, it's not always high standards. You can swipe right on every pic, and still get no match. And yeah, it crushes your soul. Day after day, week after week, no matches. You try new pictures, new ways of presenting yourself, but no one bites. And when you do get a match after months, you get ghosted in 2 messages. I thought maybe I was ugly. I asked people I knew to rate me honestly, I went on forums and asked what people thought. And no, I wasn't anywhere near ugly. I was average. That confused the heck outta me.
I ended up uninstalling these apps realizing that it was only going make me more aware of how lonely I was. And guess what? I got a girlfriend. We're not together anymore, due to circumstances (me having to move thousands of miles away being one of said circumstances), but the point remains. I wasn't undatable. Heck, I had other girls approach me too. These apps can suck your soul out and ruin your day. And sometimes, you're better off without them. That's my case.
at least it teaches us how to persevere through failure 😂
It's very common for men
The "dating" apps irritated my soul. I ended up having better luck when I by deactivated them. They aren't really for dating from a woman's perspective, they just wanted to have sex.
A lot of men are like this, it’s not just him and it’s not a color thing. The average man is no longer wanted by women, even when they average themselves
facts, large majority of men are invisible to women
My sister had like 600+ likes. I had less than 10 likes but no dates.
That's okay it's only nature unfair. You cannot win against nature.
I feel like that’s ultimately a result of social media, everyone is trying to get something that may not be meant for them in some way, looking at what other people have instead of working with what they have and going from there
Fact of life I realized at an early age. Most men are attracted to most women. Most women are not attracted to most men.
i ain’t gon lie this intro hit me in the heart. his sincerity was crazy heartbreaking
I agree with the lowering standards part, but like honestly the disparity is insane. I'm not a beautiful guy, but I'm normally formed and healthy, and the only matches I got were morbidly obese girls that I could only be attracted to when I was drunk. I quit the dating apps 2 years ago (and at the same time there was COVID lol) so I didn't have any romantic encounter for 2 years, but even then I'm really happy I quit. This environment was hella toxic for me, and to be fair, for this reason I became kinda toxic to it too, always thinking the few matches I had were playing me and stuff.
As guys we need to support each other and respectfully make it clearer to society that not *all* dating can happen online. I used to be able to meet a lot of people at the bar, or during course and stuff, but a big negative consequence of online dating is a lot of women are now very hostile towards natural encounters. Also (maybe for the same reasons) most of the social events I know are now like 90% men (a good third of whom couldn't care less about the nature of the event).
It's a really delicate topic to discuss because people will instantly reply with: "WELL YOU GOT TO LEARN YOU'RE NOT ENTITLED TO SEX OK?". Yeah I know, but it still hurts.
I don't think women overall are happy either though, even if they have a constant access to sex, from what I gather from the women I know they also have a really hard time forming long lasting relationships, so nobody wins.
It's ironic that the way people are trying to live, with technology and less in person socilizing, is also the thing that is destroying society and the individual. I've thought about doing a job in a social environment just to meet people and I'm good looking. When I hear about people who are basically lost online, and then I'm like, dude it's bad for every guy dating wise, even the good looking ones. I hate the dates I go on through Bumble and Tinder. I deleted Tinder, still got Bumble, but it all sucks. It's not worth it, just like Facebook, all these online dating needs to basically die or be like the last choice to dating.
I had women like to me about having kids on tinder.... Never again
Same. imagine how much you can find out about a person in a short conversation, compared to just texting/emailing back and forth. It is a totally different experience.
Bro, I hate to break to this you, you're not good looking.
(Zoomed into your picture)
May be slightly above-average, if even that.
The fact you aren't getting that much joy on Bumble in-terms of the quality of girl you are matching with, speaks volumes to that.
@@MakinItHappenn Same. Needs to change up his look, maybe add a beard or a new haircut or better style. Cuz if you're trying to grab people on first impressions, looking average is not going to do it.
@@BattleBladeWarrior Not sure if I agree man. You have to be an 8+/10 for Tinder / Bumble unless you want low quality girls.
Even being an every day good looking dude isn't enough. Fashion isn't going to make up the gap. Women are opportunists in-terms of their biological wiring. Whatever they say is to be taken with a grain of salt, what they do in the moment is what matters more.
They don't care about 5s and 6s when there's heaps of 8s and 9s swiping on them.
The looks threshold goes up much higher on dating apps vs real life. There are more men than women in this world. Men have a higher sex drive. Testosterone is powerful and for a dude there isn't much difference between a 5-6/10 vs a 7-8/10, as long as they are like 5. That's not the same when you look at it the other way around. Esp since dames can wear the makeup lol and no a beard is not the same level of fraud as makeup lol
I think self-improvement is interesting. It's healthy but I find that people that focus on it often end up isolated. It's like people that chase money. Some people get so addicted to self-improvement to the point that they end up alone and with low self-esteem. You acknowledge that you're improving yourself because you're not good enough to find a partner or whatever you are trying to do. People spend their whole lives chasing after a dream and die without achieving it. Just a thought.
Self improvement does not necessaey mean money. There are many aspects in life you can self improve.
Maybe so but it’s seem like most people give up on their dream before they even start and just assume it’s impossible
@Michael Ellis we all have different expectations in life and I don't think it is problematic. For some of us the idea of not even trying to improve your situation (money, appearance, mindset, relationships) is a nightmare and worse than the idea of failing (dying without success). I definitely would prefer trying hard and maybe die in the process with no success rather than watching myself having a life I am not proud of.
Spot on in my case.
I can rock with this. I spent from 28 - 33 heavily chasing marriage and children (keyword chasing). By the time I got to 34, I was so burned out. I got so tired of questioning every move I made in life and the fact that I was no longer having fun or even enjoying life.
At 34, I decided I’m just going to have fun and whatever happens, happens. Went on a lot of dates and enjoyed most of them. Met my current girlfriend right before I turned 35 and I’m 38 now.
I will say 2 things I had to accept was that I likely wasn’t going to have kids and marriage had to fall from a priority to I can take it or leave it. My current girlfriend has been married before and has 2 grown kids (she’s older than me). She’s does not want more kids and she has a stable career and household.
At 38, this is not how I envisioned my life (no kids), but honestly I grew to love it. I have the freedom to do what I want, and I think secretly my girlfriend likes it too, as she was a single parent for most of her child rearing years. She’s low key over that part of her life.
Some people quite frankly never get to where I’m at. They will always have that burning desire to have kids and be married. However, I think there does come a time where you have to come to terms with certain goals in your life. Mine was marriage and kids. If I was ever going to enjoy my time on this earth, I had to refocus on what was important and actually attainable for my life. You don’t want to be in your 40s and look back at your body of work and realize you didn’t accomplish much of anything.
Life keeps on moving and only moves faster as you get older. Learn how to enjoy other areas of your life and you’ll hopefully get to a point in your life where you do feel okay with where your life is!
5’8” relatively tall. That made my day.
As someone who's gonna be 21 years old in 6 weeks, it's really not that hard as an introvert to make friends or get into relations. I'm still single, but I'm friends with a lot of people and I'm enjoying my life how I want to. If someone comes around that I vibe with, cool... I'm down. I'm perfectly okay being single because I got all my friends and fam with me. Ik it's not gonna last forever but you gotta keep your head up.
A problem that I noticed in HS and community college is that a lot of people (mostly guys) are so desperate that they would tear their world down for another person who doesn't even love them like that; it's crazy. In HS, I always knew that I would get friendzoned 100% of the time. Instead of looking at it negatively, I just kept my head up and I supported all of them through their endeavors whenever I could as they supported me. Being single can be lonely, but honestly just go out and enjoy life with others.
(I'm basically a raver btw 😂)
If the dating scene was like advertisements, Dating Apps would be like billboards. While they are useful, it only works for particular brands/in particular ways. You may not be suited for "billboards". You may be better suited for different mediums.
Thats a wonderful analogy
Remember, common sense is NOT common...it is far easier forget men or women, but people in general to suffer in their personal misery rather than pay attention, learn and adjust your life in order to be BETTER at life.
My best friend is pretty much an older version of this guy. I've known him since college and we're in our thirties now. He's had his girlfriend since I've known him and they're still together. He met her in a student house, via a friend at a party. And not the "popular" kind of parties, the playing DaD or WoW and drinking all night type of things that we also used to do together.
All to say you guys are right again, this sad music is so stupid. Just get out there, you'll be fine, I as a relatively 'okay' looking woman usually fall for guys who are smart and funny anyway. The women you're looking for may not be on tinder.
Ngl meeting a woman through D&D sounds kinda dope
All women are on Tinder nowadays
I don't get it. Are you trying to criticize him because you think he's not growing up or are you happy for him because he's got the one and is happy with a great partner? Like, what is your perspective here?
They also might be, but not the ones you expect them to be. I met my girlfriend because she had a doofy, unflattering picture with a painting of an opossum, one of my favorite animals, with this insanely cheesy, heartwarming grin. If it hadn't been for that picture, and taking the time to actually look through her pictures, I might have swiped left. Meeting her is one of the best things that has ever happened to me.
I wish I could meet someone who like d&d and wow. Thats all Iw ant lol. 😢
That’s the thing, social interaction has become “frowned upon” with the younger generations. They make more excuses to not interact than actually go out and meet people. Some of the most memorable people I’ve met were because I made the choice to get out on a random night out, random trip somewhere. These poor kids are missing out.
Dating apps suck, I would get matches, but I would match with women that looked good on their profiles, but in real life their pics were heavily filtered or edited.🙄 The conversations were TERRIBLE, lol most conversations were soo stale that I felt that I had to do all the work just to get to know someone. I have a single friend that actually got a pretty girlfriend through a dating app and they've been together for a while BUT all my other friends don't have any success, lol. I can understand why men are bothered after using dating apps, getting constantly rejected will mess with someone's head long enough. Good advice on this video.
They can't converse. They don't have anything to say. Which kills me cuz they will talk all day...and never say nothin
I used to think I fucked my.female friends
Then I realized females can't b friends cuz they suck at even that...
So...video games. Cuz thats actually fun
When it comes to Dating Apps Trial and Error is Key, Women will say they’re all different, However Through Enough Trial and Error you’ll start to see Patterns and through seeing these Patterns you can find what works and what doesn’t work, What works (you keep in your Arsenal) and what doesn’t (you throw away)
It's not only the women who have nothing to say. I'm bisexual and it was stale on both sides it was exhausting trying to carry every conversation. The only difference was the guys would get aggressive and feel entitled to my time and attention bc while they only have a couple matches, i couldn't even get through all my likes to match back
@@davinj4806 they might have nothing to say bc they have so many matches they aren't sure if they're interested enough to put in effort yet. At least what i ended up doing
@@onetimeiateanindonesianguy6183 It's tough right now, bruh. Don't be so hard on yourself, the pandemic really did a number on people's social life. You just gotta keep pushing yourself to talk to women, if a girl comes up to you to start a conversation, that is a VERY good sign and you'll have a great chance at getting her number. Anyway, good luck, my G.
I've seen some of his tiktoks he is pretty funny, he must either be awkward when interacting with females or hasn't attracted someone he finds attractive yet.
@@YungPhilosopher he's like a 4 or 5 Bro. Thats not enough to never get a match. Someone would be desperate enough
We're taking about matching on tinder, not his interaction in public
@@YungPhilosopher tbh I'm 16 and deleted snapchat, insta and I'm never downloading dating apps cus I know how disconnected from reality social media is. So I dont rlly know how people who use dating apps function
It’s possible he could smell too
Definitely a fan of jonmos but he does seem kinda awkward and really emotional which is fine but pick and choose the setting that and tinder and bumble ain't it. He is funny though and a decent song writer in my opinion.
I’m 6’6 and haven’t once had a reply in an online dating app and one or two matches. It’s 100% looks.
Online dating sucks.
And nothing really makes me happy as far as hobbies, I really need to find one.
My friends all get matches and go out to bars and sleep with women all the time. Rarely get invited out and when I do I feel so much pressure I get a panic attack. Need to have some friends that don’t just get fucked up every day.
"I'm the worlds most undateable boy...or man, uh, or whatever gender you prefer"
Yeah it's a real mystery
“Im the world’s most undateable boy…or man, uh, or whatever gender you assume me to be.”
I think we may have found the problem here.
careful you might get smeared by the delusionals@@miragebarrage9748
Imagine being a man trying to date on tinder. It’s stacked against you.
I get play
Not a lot but a few girls a month
Dates and sex here and there
@@eatass5627 not alot but a few girls a month. That's alot. Is your intro line I eat ass?
Tinder is absolute heaven as a guy if you are a top 5% though.
Men outnumber women on tinder by almost 3 - 1 I think.
@@throwacnt7603 on face value. If you have a endless supply of attractive women wanting to sleep with you immediately you would inevitably not invest in any one of them and be a victim to the paradox of choice. Not only that, you would see the worst aspects of female nature which would make you respect them less.
Guys need to realize that girls get from 10's to 100's dm's or matches everyday.. There is almost 0 chance of getting matched/noticed, unless you are the 1% with perfect body/status/money. They don't even read the bio, they ignore the shorts. It's way too overcrowded. So don't be sulking.
-IRL talks with girls without having any expectations is prly the best way to approach at first.
-Don't be a creep but show you are interested.
-Get your confidence built up (more talking with girls/working out/etc)
That's literally it. Don't need any dating coaches, any books.. Just meet with women, let it go if you got rejected and move on.
My self-esteem is so low from my experience with online dating and dating in general that it's mostly impossible for me to not come across as creepy or awkward if I'm trying to talk to girls in my daily life.
@@Kim-Yo-jong it's normal to be awkward sometimes. Try making a joke about it or tell the truth (that you are nervous). Just try caring less. It will happen eventually. By "being a creep" I mean - stalking, talking inappropriatly, making advances when she made clear of not being interested.
Lemme just play literally the smallest violin for all those matches. Oh what a struggle it must be. You're delusional if you think those make any kind of difference for the lower percentage of men.
But what do people like myself with aspergers do. I literally do not know how to show interest without coming off creepy or even just feeling creepy and turning myself off.
Meeting people in real life, not on the Internet, is always best. Talking face to face is always best. Get out there in the real world and meet a lot of people. Talking to people out in society helps you to be more comfortable talking to people when you're face to face. These people just looking at people online on social media, talking through messaging, texting, not even talking on the phone. So when they meet someone in real life, face to face, they act so awkward, they are so nervous, they can't carry a conversation. I'm old school, I'm 46. Before the internet/social media, we just talked to each other. Face to face. Years later, I tried talking to people online. You can't really get a feel of a person, you don't know if they really look like the pictures they put online, you can't really tell what their personality is truly like just by messaging online. I'd rather meet someone in the real world, have a guy approach me, I see what he looks like, I get a real insight to his personality, and we can just talk. No messaging, no phones. Real life, face to face. If it works out it works out, if not, that's ok. You move on, there's plenty more people out there.
The comment about just talking to the opposite sex w/out expectations is solid advice. Can’t tell you how many times a conversation like this can take the right turn 30 or 45 minutes in. Taking that pressure off makes you act more natural or real & women respond to that.
This video is really eye opening. I do be acting different to women I find attractive, but the second I stop seeing them that way. I just be treating them like a dude that bleeds too much. For example, there was a girl I liked that I felt super nervous around and I acted fucking goofy (I'm mexican, but I look like i'm middle eastern) so I played the stereotypical mexican-Arabic and I was fucking cringe. After I shoot my shot and missed, I dropped the act and was just me.
we talk a little and as time passes (few months) I start realizing she coming to my side of the room on a regular bases. I ask my friend what the deal was and he said " dude, are you serious?"
"Yeah"
" dude she likes you?"
I'm in just in shock because in my head I already had that idea well she don't like me, move on.
Anyways we went on a couple of dates and were dating now. So moral of the story don't be trying to act all fresh & fit just be you.
Dude, I fucking feel this in my SOUL
It went from cringe to wholesome. That's nice. xd
💯💯💯💯💯
lol yup u got to have game.. bruh im talking at least on a basic level Not to insult you or anything..this is basic rudimentary stuff less is more...hasn’t anyone ever told you girls are like cats as soon as you try too hard the cat wants nothing to do with you.. an will run but if your calm give it space an time an don’t make any sudden moves but slowly give it a hand to sniff an let it come to you you’ve got it.
But thats what the red pill is lol "Don't chase women, Chase excellence, and the women will chase you". Women will always want what they think they can't have.
IMO extroverts don't recognise that introverts cannot just 'get out there'. These guys are introverts. Whilst it takes effort to get out there as an extrovert it's in order of magnitude far more difficult for an introvert to do that. Sometimes online dating is your only option, even if you know your chances are close to zero. I have tried the get fit and join a social group. Tried it for 2 years. Made no difference. People want bright, happy, fun people. Introverts cannot just become that. And before you say it, introvert women, don't want introvert men.
This whole "extrovert/introvert" thing is just bs. It's all mindset.
You're right, people don't want to be with miserable people. Work on yourself, make an effort to speak to people and it'll become easier over time. Labelling yourself as something and using it as an excuse doesn't help your situation, it just makes you a bitch.
@@ducksquidbat8315 you have no idea what you're talking about, but you're obviously an extrovert.
Introverts aren't miserable. They find socialising extremely draining.
@@ducksquidbat8315 Lol no, it's not all mindset, go read psychology and the big 5 personality traits. Those traits are both genetic and made in early childhood. You can move them around a bit as an adult but they are largely set.
I’m an introvert woman and I have been attracted to many introverted guys, but I will say that it never works out with them and it’s hard to actually connect. I’m thinking I’d be better with a slightly more extroverted guy so someone is making the potential relationship happen
@@ducksquidbat8315 go do a basic psychology class and try again
I have said for years men try to be your friend to pounce when you're vulnerable. I'm always told I'm paranoid. These guys speak the truth!
I’m glad I never got into or ever felt like I’ve needed dating apps. I wasn’t the best looking guy but confidence and jokes carried me through high school nicely. I had a few girlfriends before I met my high school sweetheart and we are going on 10 years so I perfectly missed all of this. It is fascinating to me to learn about it through other people and their perspectives.
"Just have a conversation. Get used to that." YES!!!!!!! PREACH!!! I'm not attractive, but I've been able to talk my way into companionship with my witty bants. Just be yourself, and find people with similar interests!
Um...bro if thats you in your profile pic then you're attractive...no homo.
That’s never worked and I am actually one of the most buff people I know because I just cope by going to the gym, is what it is tho, I bought big pillows to cuddle with at night .
@@JohnDoe-gz4cx Sorry to hear that dude. I met one of my best GFs by playing Paper Mario Thousand Year Door with her. I can only speak for what works for me, and my success is questionable and limited XD.
@@mandolorian9893 I appreciate the compliment. However, I'm a performer, so i need nice headshots. Those photos are no more real then all the airbrushed photos in a Victoria's Secret catalogue. There is a beauty stereotype for men woman use I do not fit, which has become more prevalent as social media has made dating more shallow. I'm not tall, buff, alpha, outwardly opulent, and, as you can tell, always confident in myself. I've never done anything but talk my way into sex, and that's the gods honest truth.
I know damn well I didn't just read just be yourself in 2022.
The friend zone is a reeealll thing but what men don’t acknowledge is that often they are the ones that put them selves there.
@@realty634 see, I don’t know if that’s really it. I think it’s more of a good guy but not useful to me situation. Sometimes it’s physically, sometimes it’s financially or mentally.
Nah, most times it starts out as friendship, then the guy puts the girl in Fck/girlfriend zone. No one put them there, they are acting participations of their own delusions.
Tinder is pay to play. If people find genuine matches, the paying stops.
12:03, you forget, "average" is ugly to women.
Correct, but average men can still get sex. Sub-8 theory/Chad-only is delusional.
this. when women say the gave the average guy a chance remember that study showing women rating 80% of men as below average
I think his detriment is his honesty and openness. He’s too much of an open book. Sadly society doesn’t respond well to that. I’m struggling with the same thing
I agree, I'm a girl and being honest gets me in trouble
@@iStorm-my5fp I don't think you understand what I'm talking about
@@mastereppsreturns6586 then explain what you think i misunderstood
@@iStorm-my5fp A guy that is too honest about how he feels, what he thinks, finds it easy to say personal things about himself to people he just met or at least doesn’t know that well, .. like a guy that doesn’t pretend AT ALL is deemed unattractive by society.
Usually a guy has a filter between how he feels on the inside and what he expresses, takes effort to get him to open up, for some reason, it gives him an air of mystery and that makes him interesting _”I want him to open up to me”_ there’s a challenge in that. Compare that to a guy that walks around as an open book doesn’t have that filter or mystery
I know what you’re thinking “honesty is good/I prefer the honest guy” right? That’s what society tells him, and it’s probably why him and I learned to be like that with people, but sadly that’s not the reality, and that’s not the type of guys You are probably currently interested in. If I had to guess, you’re interested in someone who’s a bit closed off, despite your opinion on the matter
@@mastereppsreturns6586 Women never want full disclosure.
This video needs to be the introduction video for every dating app immediately after signing up. People see dating apps as the golden ticket but they do not realize how little success so many people have on apps. The biggest truth you both spoke about was learning how to talk to the opposite sex. The second is the friend zone. I hate hearing guys complain about it without taking accountability for their actions that put them there. Make your intentions clear if you want to date a girl make it clear and if it is a no move on. If it truly is a girl who you have a lot in common with but no emotional or physical attraction to and want as a friend make it clear and act that way. Do not treat them any different than any of your other guy friends.
That is true what you said about making intentions clear to the women.
At the same time, the advice of Aba and Preach about talking to women without having an "end game" in mind is incorrect.
That is exactly what men should not do.
As you said, intentions have to be made clear. If not on first day, at least by second day.
@truthteller8965 I disagree. With women I don't usually get a crush on them until I've talked to them for a little bit, like maybe a few days. How do you let them know your intentions if you don't even know your intentions yourself yet?
@@truthteller8965again, If I don't know my intentions initially because I don't know the person at all, tf you want me to do?
I agree with the floor and that last look Preach gave the cam.
It really is motivation to me, focus on yourself, work hard and they gonna come along the way
The problem with this advice is, Tinder/other apps have changed women's expectations so damn much, the advice to just stay offline and focus on that doesn't hit any more, or at least not so well. It's hard to care about normal men you meet when you know the men you actually want exist online. It's like not buying things at the store because you can get it better and cheaper online.
To be fair, this happens to men too, but only to the men who are successful on platforms like Tinder.
It only happens to chad on tinder you mean
No, it hasn't changed most women's expectations. But OD has made the process much more shallow. Plus there aren't that many women on dating apps as men, and many of those women being bots. Plus most guys can't take a good photo to save their lives, they have no perception on what women usually find attractive. In real life men are more shallow and always punch above their waist, and it work if they have the personality or the charms. But it doesn't translate through in OD.
It’s like he did in the video dating apps are good for average women not average men
I'll never forget the excitement I felt getting likes by all these women. It wasn't wrong before I realized 99 percent of them were bots advertising some shitty scam. Not only did my self esteem plummet to an all time low, but I was paying thirty dollars a month to do so. Ever since the boom of the internet, dating has become more superficial than ever. Especially with how easy it is to artificially make yourself better looking with just a simple touch of the button. Meeting people has become as easy as it's ever been but ironically it's also become harder.
if your gonna go the online route you have to use chat rooms
Great advice out if the gate for the first guy, hope it reaches him or someone like him. Much better than the response he got
Appreciate the advice. Not all of us are as confident as we'd like to be.
The thing y'all are saying, I've known about myself. You gotta appreciate the love you get and take it for what it is.
Maybe you can't find what you want, and maybe you gotta open yourself up.
And maybe, you're meant to not have that; and in that situation, just show love to everybody.
❤❤❤❤❤❤
I only have gotten 5 real matches on tinder, out of 6 years. Bought tinder gold and premium tons of super likes. I use to feel down, but I realize it’s all face value. Unfortunately I’m not the most attractive guy so I have to be in social settings. My personality has to shine through and nowadays most women could care lesss about being funny without being attractive. My life is together I work out im not fat or anything. Sometimes you gotta just deal with the cards you been dealt. It took me so long to accept that.
Don’t worry about it too much brother. These apps have an over saturation of men using them so only a small % reap the rewards while the rest are left with nothing, not to mention the algorithm punishing you if you have swiped too many times on your account therefore making your account not visible to others.
@@user-pd9xj1bt4e It is quite the same in real life social events also. There are more men than women in real life social events. Most women come with their friends. Women quickly get surrounded by men in social events
your looksmatch has a 100 bodies. it's sickening isn't it?
I literally got zero matches in the 3 different times I tried the apps. Trust me, it was NEVER a matter of standards. I swiped ugly people on purpose... NOTHING. Sometimes, and I really do mean sometimes, it's actually as they say it is. No matches come through at all.
I just felt like some people might blame themselves over shit like that being said, then they lower their standards so much, they end up in abusive/unhappy relationships
The classic strat: swipe right on everyone and sort em out later haha
@@Dreadkid08 Thats a horrible strategy. It is proven that by doing that on tinder at least the algorithm will be against you. It only gets worst from there.
@@freshandfit3849 facts that messes up your algorithm it’s better to actually swipe your level and your preferences specifically
@@Dreadkid08 That's what every dude do on the app
@@Dreadkid08 I'm not sure how many guys use that tactic but I have caught a few who have done it. I had brought the first tier package on Tinder that allows you to see whi swipes right on you. Well as I was going through the 500+ guys, one of the guys who I swiped right on all of a sudden disappeared. Lol. I guess he said to himself " no, fat chick allowed" but wanted to see who would bite. 🤷🏽♀️
The second guy...I can tell you right now that his lack of punctuation would send me running.
“That is why I do not even bother”
Shrimp
This was some actual advice here. Take them seriously and change your life. When you stop blaming others and start just making corrections to your personal situation you can thrive. Wherever you are at you can improve, improvement is a long-term goal. It will NOT happen over night but over months and years. This is cool, you are already doing it but with focus you can accelerate the process.
It rarely works, though. I've known plenty of people who put real serious effort I to being their best versions of themselves, and they are still practically undateable. That's reality.
women don't care about effort until they wanna trap you ina marriage. they care about face and height - genetics
I also think being comfortable with yourself is key too
I get matches very rarely but when I do I send the first message with a friendly greeting and never get a response or they try to get me to buy a subscription. It made me sad at first but I eventually got over it.
Look, finding a real relationship on a social platform is unlikely and a waste of time. The best way to find a real connection with someone is face-to-face. Even texting and snapchatting is nothing compared to actually seeing one another and having meaningful conversation. Social media has really ruined reality for us and discouraged so many people from realizing the problem is how we meet people.
I do not disagree by any means, but the one simple problem with that is location, location, location. Where should we go to meet these people? Not everybody lives in areas where they can meet people readily.
@@ChaosInsanist totally this for me, I am aware its going to take a lot more effort but its like I dont even know where to go
@@ChaosInsanist stores, malls, bookstore, gym, events, but if you like in a small rural area then good luck
I feel sorry for some folks in their 20s having difficulty with dating. The Tinder thing is about quick sex, not dating or relationships. But aside from that it seems to me dating has gotten more weird or difficult. I feel for this guy because he's not super handsome but he wants a relationship. But he must, I think, look at his strong suits. And meet women on the long term.
It's nice to have people to sympathize, but I think he needs at least one brutally honest friend. I need one too! A pal once asked me what he could change about himself to attract girls, and I gave him an essay about how he can't change his height, but his wardrobe! He has a girlfriend now.
When I ask them the same, I'm given the "There's nothing wrong with you" schpiel!😂
Not just Tinder majority of dating apps are about quick sex. I deactivated my accounts after two months and only met one guy in person. I only met him because he was the only one who didn't come on strong for sex.
@@MrsNicolas dating apps sells "S3x" for men and "attention" for women.
The issue is these apps hoards a lot of dating energy and ruins the view people have on life.
For a guy's or chick perspective it can be awesome if you are very very good looking and shallow.
If you look average it varies. For the guy it's little to no matches with women who are not eager to meet you (by comparison to other matches).
An average women can get a warped view of her dating strenght and become delusional with simps attention and ruined possible compatible matches.
Just my opinion.
@@Koozomec I'm an average looking for in the face, and trust me, I'm far from delusional about the attention those men gave me.
@@MrsNicolas On your individual level ok. But it's a numbers game and enough people are playing the field to ruin large population.
The more I watch their videos, the more impressed I get. Aba and Preach, both of you are so wise.
You sir, are maidenless.