Getting Evaluated For AuDHD...
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- čas přidán 29. 08. 2024
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I had the reverse experience. Was diagnosed with Asperger’s as a child, didn’t think I had ADHD until I watched Everything Everywhere All At Once and thought “this is like someone cracked my skull open and poured all my thoughts onto celluloid.” Found out that the heroine had undiagnosed ADHD and one of the directors learned he had it as well, looked more into it, and realized that I had it, too.
That movie title alone is my brain.
That’s an excellent movie. Weird, but super interesting.
Remember that Asperger's doesn't exist anymore, it's just qualified as high functioning autism.
So do you have a double diagnosis? or do you belive that the Asperger's diagnosis was erroneous? (sorry to ask you two questions at once)
I was diagnoses with Aspergers 12 years ago when I was 34, and I feel it fits me perfectly.
Putting your thoughts onto celluloid? Explain about this please.
So, I wasn’t formally evaluated for ADHD but was prescribed medication based on my med manager’s observation. Then a few years later my *therapist* suggested I get evaluated for autism. Got my diagnosis. Fast forward about 2 years and I needed documentation on my adhd to get approval to take my meds during a professional certification testing. I went back to the doctor who gave me my autism diagnosis to see if they could assess me for ADHD. Only to be told they had assessed me and diagnosed me with it at the same time. They just like forgot to tell me? Somehow?
Anyway, incredibly comorbid!
Glad you got it figured out! But yeah, apparently it is a thing to try and not tell people they are autistic to "spare them" or to spare feelings--as if hiding that is somehow helpful. Still too much stigma around it being a "bad" thing instead of just...a thing.
I'm in the medical field. This happens a lot with every diagnosis in all fields. It is incredibly frustrating and I rail against it all the time. It effects patients across the whole medical system.
At least she didn't pull the "yeah i thought you knew"
I'm 47 and getting assessed for Autism just now too. Got my ADHD diagnosis in 2012. The first assessment is done and I got my referral to a specialist unit here in Edinburgh (Scotland). When I told my mum, my sister and friends about it they were all like - you considering this just now? Better late then never.
Idk about you, but I feel like it's so obvious to other people you (the generaly you, not YOU you, lol) are autistic, but then they like NEVER suggest it to you ever until you "come out" as thinking you might be, lol.
I also find it really funny how most of my favourite people on CZcams have autism and/or ADHD..but those with AuDHD are just *so* relatable. and now YOU bring it up 😂
This stems from the fact that before 2013, science thought you could only have adhd OR autism, not both. Lots of us Olds finding out now how wrong science was the hard way.
Good luck, and you're not alone ❤
Science develops. That is what is wonderful about it. Scientists actively seek to prove each other wrong. That's what peer review is. Scientific consensus evolves with understanding. That is why it is awesome.
@JLakis I agree, but it's hard to not be upset for myself and the people left behind in the process of how slowly it develops, in addition to how just because science says so doesn't mean doctors will agree. There's a lot of fuckery.
Monotropic theory of neurodivergence is really interesting
AuDHD has its difficulties, but it's a great club 💖
Yeah, reading about that was one of the reasons I decided to seek out an eval as well, I have taken that questionnaire several times and my most common score is a 218.
@@catxtrallwaysHubbawha…? Are you talking about burnout or is there a new crackpot theory going around?
@stolenrelic There is also recent research that correlates high rates of co-occurring CPTSD and autism.
@@BeeWhistler I think they maybe meant that knowing what you have makes it easier to find ways to live without breaking yourself trying to fit into the "normal" box?
When our eldest son (now 24yo) was in 2nd grade, the school called us in for a meeting to tell us that they thought he had ADHD. I, like you, went down a research rabbit hole, and kept coming across descriptions of Asperger's, and these descriptions read like a shopping list of his personality traits. It took us 6 months to get his paediatrician to acknowledge and diagnose him, but, yep, kid is on the spectrum.
In the 17 years since that original diagnosis, my brother, my sister, three of my nephews (apparently no one in my family knows how to have girls), my younger son, and I have all been diagnosed with autism, ADHD or AuDHD. We also all acknowledge that several other family members are practicing Autism without a licence, so to speak.
Strong in my family the Spectrum is.
I love that phrase "practising autism without a licence" 😂
@@zilliesanders7211 Thanks, I was pretty pleased with it myself. 😄
I'm going to steal "practicing autism without a license" from now on...to talk about my undiagnosed family members 😅
My kid says they have "a touch of the 'tism"
This definitely sounds like my family too (though we have girls). Only a few of us have a licence and I'm the only one with diagnosed autism, but I can definitely point you towards a few that would have no problem getting that licence
One of us! One of us! ONE OF US!! ONE OF US!!!!
But no seriously I got diagnosed with autism in 2019 and literally took my first vyvanse on the 7th for adhd. My brain is... so calm.
Also 2019 diagnosis
Gooble gobble. And yes, that.
Ahaha This "one of us" chant came to mind for me too, as I happy danced and showed my husband this video! 😂 🎉
❤❤❤
I tried autism tests a few years ago just out of curiosity. The results were a shock. Hugely high scores. Then my husband took a course provided by his work on recognising ADHD symptoms. When he came home….
Anywho?
Same. The only score I got that was out of the norm was for empathy. Everything else I knocked out of the park.
@@Trix897 High empathy scores are common in "women's" autism. And frankly, I think a lot of autistic men are actually empathetic but there's emotional overload risk so it gets locked down as a coping mechanism.
I felt the same! I went to a psychiatrist and said "I'm noticing I have a lot of Autistic traits but I've also been diagnosed with ADHD as a child, even though I don't trust that doctor, so I'd like to get tested for both" and he told me I was definitely someone with ADHD and not Autism...
But even though I do relate to a lot of ADHD stuff, parts of it felt off, and it made me feel like an imposter. Skip to a couple years later, my psychologist is listening to me talk about how I grew up having to learn how to emote properly, and how facual expressions don't come fully naturally to me, and says "honestly, I don't want to speak to soon, but you sound like you're Autistic"
I'm not officially diagnosed yet, but at this rate it's getting very clear, and my partner and I find it easier to consider me as autistic, in our efforts to learn how to better communicate
yeah that tracks. a lot of doctors and assessments fail entirely to account for masking into adulthood. if you're not a 5 year old boy the tests are hit or miss 😅
hope you're able to get the support you need either way ❤
OMG! I am AuDHD, and my AuDHD radar has been going off on you since I first started watching you. Purely ADHD is much more spastic in a good way, but they are all over the place! On the other hand, AuDHDers have a much calmer presentation of ADHD. Your presentation seemed more like mine, and my experiences. But who am I to suggest that you might be AuDHD? LOL! Just for the record, I was diagnosed with ADHD in 1994 and with the Autistic side in 2021. Honestly, it wouldn't have mattered because I didn't understand my ADHD at all, and got no treatment for it. By the way, ASD and ADHD run in families and rarely skip a generation. ADHD has been added to the spectrum but isn't categorized as ASD yet. Many Neuropsychologists believe it is just a type of presentation of ASD, because of how many of the traits cross over between the two. Then there is the number of ASD who are also ADHD and ADHD who are also Autistic. It really points to it being one brain type.
Ayyy if it turns out you are, welcome to the Late Diagnosis Party!
I was obviously Autistic as a child, to the point where the Special Education teacher at my Elementary School, deapite having not even remotely been a teacher of mine, asked to meet with my parents and tactfully brought up assessing me so I could get some support.
Sadly, among the medical community in the time and place I grew up, Autism was still considered a "little boys' disease," so my parents got a "That's Impossible" and I just had to Go Figure Life Out.
Then when I was 17, after going online and finding a post made by an autistic person about an autistic experience and going "Haha relatable. ... Wait. Relatable???" and going down that rabbit hole, I asked my mom one morning if I could be. That is when she recounted the earlier childhood story and went, "I frickin knew it, those bastards!"
This feels very much like just reaching the top of the first hill on a roller coaster.
One of us! One of us! One of us! 😊❤
I’m autistic with traits of adhd that’s not quite enough to be diagnosed. Got my ASD diagnosis last year at 41 years old, funnily enough also because I have neurodivergent children and identified a lot with my reading and their experiences.
Be warned, no matter how well you think you’re expecting the result, you will go on an emotional rollercoaster once you get it and feel all the feelings (sometimes all at once 😮). It’s apparently very normal and does settle down after a little while 😉
My therapist was also the one who suggested I get evaluated for Audhd, at 39. Worth it! I am so much better off now than I was back then; no force in the verse could compel me to return to the profound confusion of before
I hear you! I had the reverse experience-first autism, then ADHD diagnosis, 2nd evaluation brought on through working on learning how to support my ADHD kiddo. Now, we're both diagnosed with AuDHD.
You just described my journey!!!
I even went back to school to get my psych degree, so I could better advocate for my autistic and AuDHD kids....
Got my autism Dx just before I turned 50, and my therapist is pretty confident AuDHD is going to be an even more accurate Dx....
😅
I've been watching video's with Torin Wolf and his mom on social media and the more his mother discusses her ADHD and Autism, the more I recognize myself in her. I just retired and no one ever suggested I was neuro-divergent but looking at the criteria, I fit a lot of them.
Honestly at this point me being subscribed to ones youtube should be on the DSM for AuDHD...
Welcome to the club!
Yeah, this is how it seems to go for me, too. Dx ADHD at age 40, autistic at age 53.
My youngest regressed and was non-verbal, so it wasn't easy to see the similarities at first. But when my 16 yr old got diagnosed a couple of years ago, I was in the room listening to the questions. I think I figured out where my kids got it.
I have ADHD and I've started to wonder if I'm AuDHD... 😅
I am traveling the dyspraxic>ADHD>autistic road right now. Join me, it's fun!
@@teddyjlockwood I'm AuDHD, and can confirm that unless in hyperfocus...studying is hell. Especially if, like me, you also have learning issues or a processing disorder adding on top of that.
@@teddyjlockwood Makes sense. It's fairly common to have "skill regression" once unmasking since you're relearning a lot. Since you're dealing with trying to become yourself.
And as hard as it may have been, I am glad you were able to find your own ways to study. I know for me studying was very difficult because the only methods I was told were not ones that worked for my brain, and I was not given the grace or time to do so on my own time in a way that worked for me. (Very much the schooling of "do it this way and it has to be this way only!")
But on my own, before I got more trauma from NT schooling, I was an avid reader, and I'm trying to get that back.
I hope you are able to study more readily again and get those skills back as you blossom.
I was diagnosed with ADD at 21; I was diagnosed with autism at 40. I’ve enjoyed learning about more of my autistic behaviors. Tho difficult at times, I luv how I can sometimes spin what seems like a negative behavior, into a positive attribute. Good luck❤
One of us! One of us! I'm recently diagnosed as AuDHD at 40, so much of my childhood now makes sense.
Welcome to the club! Being diagnosed at 34 was the best thing that ever happened to me. A weight I had been carrying my whole life was lifted and it’s taken some time to get there, but I’m finally at a place where I can say I love myself and mean it.
So beautiful "as I was trying to understand them better to be a better parent". May everyone be blessed w this kind of love 💖
Its often parents don't know they are until their children are diagnosed with it. Because its hereditary one or both parents can have it.
I agree and with Autism, this is only one person's limited observation, like attracts like. My kid prefers neurodivergent kids. They get each other and don't judge for the most part.
LET’S GOOOO BABY WELCOME TO THE CLUB!
Spent almost my entire life with an ADHD diagnosis. My mom spotted it because my older brother had gotten diagnosed with it as well 10 years before me.
It wasn’t until I got a therapist that was autistic herself that literally anyone in my life went, “Hey you might be autistic.” She seriously blindsided me with that because not once, not even amongst my neurodivergent friends and partners did anyone clock that I was even remotely on the spectrum.
Now that I am diagnosed, sometimes I can’t help but feel a bit of grief for all the times I went misunderstood growing up.
Okay... this is exactly my experience when I had been told I was depressed. 😅
First reaction: "What!? No, I am not!"
Second reaction after doing some research on what depression is and where it comes from: "I am depressed since early childhood. I didn't know it any better. I thought everyone was feeling that miserable. Also I didn't know it was that miserable, cos I had no happiness to compare it to."
Sad to say, what I read up on about autism... it's the father who provides the genetic predisposition for it. But they really don't even now anything about it yet. Not where it truely comes from, nor how to handle it. So...anywho😅
I got many unexpected diagnoses in my early 40's. With help from my therapist and psychiatrist, I learned I am ADHD, OCD and have social anxiety disorder. I'm dragging my feet a little about finalizing the Asperger's diagnosis because reasons (none of which are good and have everything to do with a weird notion of personal pride). When I revealed this to my friends, family and husband, well, it came as a shock to no one except me. So many, "Yeah, that makes so much more sense, now!" or "That explains everything!". I'm not upset. If anything, me accepting these new changes to my identity is a bit of an apology because I was not easy to exist with even when I was paying attention. Learning these things closer to 50 than 12, you're response is more mature and you realize you've made it this far and you're a reasonable facsimile of a useful, non-feral adult member of society, so it's not gonna be that bad. In fact, it' getting better all the time.
Hello, welcome to the team. There's a lot of us who only found out in the past 3 years ❤ the community has been very supportive
I got my autism diagnosis last year (at 42), but it had been clear to me for years because of my son, who was diagnosed 10 years ago. All parents of autistic children should be evaluated right after the kid's diagnosis. Being diagnosed much earlier would have been a blessing.
One more "any who" and I was going to have to call a therapist. 😂
"I'd feel very comfortable writing you a referral" is the same energy as my therapist responding when I was bitching about a bad and traumatic therapy I'd had with "That is a strange choice, I wouldn't do it that way."
Dude! This is oddly relatable. I've mentioned on previous videos that I was diagnosed with ADHD within the last few months, at 39 years old. Literally today, I received a questionnaire from my psychiatrist, starting the process for autism spectrum disorder testing. Like you, I have consumed information related to ADS, and a large portion represents my experience.
Welcome to the club!!! Myself diagnosed by professionals over a decade ago when it was a separate label. Now my fiance has come to understand himself on a similar path, knew the ADHD, had an autistic brother, and we have been exploring our worlds to learn how to accommodate for each other better.
Thank you for being a role model you may never asked to be, but you have always felt like “family vibes” to us, and we are grateful to so many others becoming aware!
I've just been diagnosed with ADHD at age 38. It doesn't change anything but it helps to understand. My life is a disaster anyway. I have already debilitating OCD, ED, CPTSD and my body is in pain all the time (no clue why). And I have a brain tumor. But to have a name for something you experience is nice in some way like now you have proof. I wish for everyone that they get the help and diagnosis that may help them.
@lenablanc7162 Undiagnosed pain is awful. I had that for years as well and all I really wanted was answers. I never did get a solid diagnosis, the closest I came was CRPS, but it never quite fit. Eventually it started getting better on its own and looking back that lined up with when I started on an antidepressant that worked. I think mine was just unresolved trauma and depression. Not saying that's what you're dealing with, but I understand how exhausting it is to be in constant pain and not have answers.
@@meganboyer5782 thanks for answering. Yeah no doctor could give me any diagnosis. I know I have endometriosis but that explains only a few symptoms. And I'm in a really bad mental space right now, maybe it could affect my body. It's just years of pain, and it's exhausting. I'm glad yours got better.
I'm 61, and learning more about autism made my whole childhood (and young adulthood) make sense.
Maybe I should ask my psychiatrist for a referral, tho at 61 it seems kinda late.
It’s never too late to learn about yourself! ❤
As someone who'd been trying to get evaluated for ADHD (probably inattentive type) but my parents just forgot, this feels so alien in the most bittersweet way.
@CreatureCreations- have you considered that maybe they didn’t ’just forget’ but maybe they too have something causing them to be inattentive? I got my assessment after my daughter got hers, we’re both AuDHD. Wishing you luck my friend
That is a tough one.
Labels don't have to change who we are. They can identify what we have always been and make our day to day successes all the more amazing.
Yes! So very much this.
32 now, I was diagnosed with ADHD as a kid but it didn't feel like the full picture. I felt like I felt some what similar to adhd people (like my hubby and others) but still felt alone in my struggles. So much of ASD tik tok resonated with me. I went to a husband/wife team who are a psychiatrist and psychologist who specializes in ND women. In the first appointment she was like "I think that instead of you being ADHD with a spice of ASD, (which is what I was guessing at the time) you are someone that is ASD with ADHD" my mind was BLOWN. Her husband ended up giving me the official diagnosis months later.
I have found it important to consider myself BOTH ADHD and ASD. It's such a confusing and interesting combination. I know that when I hear the stories of ASD people, I relate in some ways but when I hear the stories from audhd people...... MAN it's validating.
In addition I think I also have CPTSD mixed in too. The ven diagram of symptoms that all of these things share is complex. But it had been an interesting adventure unravelling it all 😊 and also healing too. And also HARD. I wish you luck in your adventure.
Dr Kerry McAvoy got diagnosed in her 50s just sometime ago.
She talks about healthy and toxic relationships on the internet.
Glad your therapist supports you!
I was diagnosed as ADHD (innatentive) and "aspergers" at 16-17, but because it was not a legal diagnosis anymore and it was actually "autism" and the reasoning was super ableist, we focused on the ADHD and I basically lost my autism diagnosis since the evaluator refused to use the right terms and codes for autism instead.
Proudly accepting myself as an AuDHD adult at 20 was the best thing I ever did. And I really wish more people knew about this as parents--because while I love my parents and they were really trying, they only knew NT methods, and even learning JUST the ADHD ones was hard for them and caused a lot of trauma and family issues at the time. We're in family therapy now and things are much much better--I just wish I didn't have school-related-PTSD because all school adults in my life decided I was just a "bad kid" for years and my parents had no knowledge of the topic. :/
But luckily they are accepting of the diagnosis, we joke about stuff a lot in a ND context, and some of my extended family is also very ND so we can talk about it together. :)
Asperger's was ableist and invented by Notsees (specifically Dr. Hans Asperger, who used it to sort boys who would still be useful to the Third Reich from ones who got sent off to beta test the Zyklon-B showers or otherwise just get murdered for "racial purity"). I am so tired of people clinging to it because they have these bigoted ideas about being autistic.
Yup same.
The closest matches for my internal experience are the ones who have BOTH ADHD & ASD
Welcome to the club! I went down a research rabbit hole when my therapist suggested that the sensory issues I was having in May of 2020 (trapped in the house 24/7 with two kids under 6) might be autism.
I played “Show Yourself” from Frozen 2 on repeat for weeeeks.
Your therapist is good people, but the "VEEERY" took me out 😂😂😂
Diagnosed AuDHD at 51 here and I feel ya, man. The discovery made me feel much better about myself, though I am still having problems with how I am going to deal with the world around me moving on.
I'm in my 50s and thinking about getting tested. Both my kids have been late diagnosed and I qualify at least as a "mom with autistic traits." How worth it do you think getting the diagnosis was?
@@amw6846 I've struggled my whole life. I've been unable to maintain long-term social relationships, which contributed to an inability to maintain a job for more than 2-3 years. Being raised by parents who had the "pull yourself up by your bootstraps" mentality, they were less than helpful with my issue and used it to peg me as lazy and having low-potential. This caused me to live with a lifetime of CPTSD causing an intense avoidance of discussing or bringing up my issues with anyone. Having a complete meltdown every 2-5 years made it hard to live a normal life. I just thought I was a f*ck-up and felt generally worthless while trying to hide all this from everyone I met.
My condition just got done helping destroy my longest relationship of ~20 years. I was unable to cope with the legitimate issues my partner had with me as well as how they chose to convey those issues.
For me, my diagnosis contained a limitless amount of explanation and vindication. Now the only issue I know I have is learning how to cope with this issue at my age. I am currently questioning my ability to deal with the rest of my life in a productive manner. The only thing I know is that I cannot continue to live my life how I've been limping along until now. I am exhausted and know that to do so will only make my situation worse.
In the last ten years I've earned my Bachelors in Computer Science thinking that it would help me. Going back to work after my degree showed that it just made my situation worse. Higher stress jobs are a no-go.
Now I *need* help from professionals and sympathetic people to help me figure out the rest of my life. I can't continue without them.
How worth it is to get your diagnoses in my opinion depends deeply on how much it will help your piece of mind and help your life. If you have a job you're happy with and relationships that you are secure with as well as confidence to repair or move on if any of these situations falter, then I personally believe that the only thing your diagnoses will give you is an explanation for how you feel about yourself.
If you feel like you've been living life like you're hanging over a ledge while someone dirty dances on your digits, then I'd endorse seeking a diagnosis.
Welcome to the Autistic community and especially the AuDHD community!! We are cool!! I was the opposite of figuring myself out. I knew I was Autistic first because of my Mom even though I didn't immediately get diagnosed because I didn't present like a Cis Straight White boy that Autism researchers only studied before they finally acknowledged people may present differently than their very narrow list of traits. She did fight for me getting diagnosed. Eventually, I got recognized in high school for my obvious Autistic traits!
However, it took me into my early 20's to figure out that I am also ADHD when I went down a rabbit hole on how to better support Autistic and ADHD people in general for a project I was working on for my Major in college. I found myself relating way too heavily to ADHD people and suddenly realized how my Mom is definitely ADHD herself. I started seeing what I perceived as normal for me, and my Mom wasn't the norm for people who aren't ADHD. It was the slow realization of how Neurodivergent my family truly is, especially with my Dad being clearly Autistic and my younger sibling also being ADHD. It's realizing how obviously Neurodivergent my family actually is and how so many family members in my family on both sides are so clearly Neurodivergent for multiple things.
Welcome! Realizing that I am autistic after my son’s diagnosis is the best thing that ever happened to me 🙏🏾
Congrats!
I did similarly as you and did a bunch of research and started seeing my daughter’s therapist (my daughter requested I be in her appointments so she wasn’t breaking protocol) to understand my daughter better. I’m not on the spectrum nor ADHD… my daughter inherited that from her father. But… I do understand her WAY better now. 😊
Heyyy welcome to the club! 🎉 I love when folks I consider kindred weirdy brains go on their own journey to finding that identity for themselves. I try not to armchair diagnose people, but they say it takes one to know one, and I've definitely had several 'namaste' moments watching your videos.
This is why early diagnosis is so important and so much clearer. In this case it was an ADHD diagnosis possibly being and autism diagnosis. In much worse cases children get diagnosed with oppositional defiance or adults with antisocial. The Speech Professor would not have the ability to be diagnosed at 2 years but nowadays we have this great opportunity. Most people tell me my kid was too young to be diagnosed. The Dr and the team who diagnosed were experts and able to tell me exactly the symptoms because my kid wasn't masking yet. It has helped me be an advocate and helped others understand them better. I hope you find the answers you are looking for. Autism isn't a label. If the doctor said you had heart disease, you wouldn't rail at him for labeling you. You'd make changes to help you feel better.
I’m 52 and got my diagnosis about 2 years ago. First diagnosed adhd, but also scored high on the aq10, then 6 months later got the autism diog. The adhd I expected, the autism was a surprise. I finally went for diagnoses because my daughter also has both, and she suggested it. She was finally diagnosed at 24
Did being diagnosed change anything for you? I’m 51 and have wondered if I should be evaluated, but then think why bother this late in life.
@@marcilk7534 It did, it gave me a better understanding of me. It has allowed me to be a bit more gentle with myself when I’m having a hard time with something, feeling overwhelmed or over stimulated. I once read something along the lines of…. ‘Late diagnosis is a bit like watching your favourite tv show over again, but this time you know the ending. So everything suddenly makes sense. It’s both amazing and a bit sad’
Personally I don’t regret being assessed, part of me feels a bit easier knowing the answer to so many questions of ‘why’
I wish you all the very best on your journey my friend
Very interesting. I started watching your content way back when it was teaching content as I had recently started teaching my first class as a college professor. In the last year, I've had the realization that I'm audDHD and started noticing signs of autism in many of people that I spend a lot of time with. I started to wonder if it was all in my head because I was noticing them everywhere. Even in people (like you) that I watch on youtube. Thank you for posting this so I know it isn't all in my head.
Yeah, I'm currently waiting for the results. I think they said there is more testing they are going to need to do. It seems insane to me that ADHD isn't considered an autism spectrum disorder, the similarities in symptoms are... striking to say the least.
I had the opposite. Was diagnosed with "atypical autism" back in 2013, but I didn't believe it. They just didn't know how to help me otherwise and a diagnosis opens a lot of doors in my country. In 2020, I came across Attachment Theory - especially the Fearful Avoidant attachment style - especially one of the causes of it - CPTSD - and OM MY GOD! EVERY sentence I was reading was about me!
Its so interesting to find out how many of the people i follow on social media have my same diagnosis.
I was diagnosed with ADHD pretty early on in my childhood. I had a period of time in my late teens/early 20's where I assumed I may have 'grown out of it.' Since I became much less hyper and exhibited less erratic behavior as I got older. This was also after I had stopped taking my AHDH medication I was prescribed all through elementary, middle, and high school - after it's effects changed (with my phisiology, I assume) and started acting like speed!
Fast forward a few years, and taking into account the inclusion an unhealthy dose of PTSD from both parents becoming alcoholics, gamblers, and drug users... I started to notice I was washing my hands more frequently and thoroughly than anyone I knew. I eventually assumed that I had acquired a mild form of OCD between having ADHD and being subjected to extremely stressful situations persistently for several years.
Ugh. I'm rambling lol. The point I was trying to work towards is that now, I see MANY ADHD traits in my mom - although she is under a lot of stress right now with the loss of my dad a few years ago, my grandmother having dementia, and being on many medications, health issues... drinking still. And looking back at how my dad handled certain events over the years, sometimes I wonder if he may have had some autism traits which affected the way he handled certain things.
Then there's me, wondering if I inherited those from both sides and I'm just the first in our lineage to be properly diagnosed (maybe??) with ADHD, or even just being aware of ADD/ADHD and autism, and correlating that the best I can with all the general interest and research I've done.
'Tis a strange life.
Congrats and welcome to more of the clubhouse. ♾️🌈🧠🌶️♾️
P.S. Lots of people are starting to view the DSM's 3 types of ADHD and 1 type of autism as a very incomplete sampling of a much longer list of traits that encompasses all of the above (plus all the stuff that hasn't made it into the DSM yet, but are common).
We each have constellation(s) of traits from the same planetarium. ❤
the more i watch online, the more im sure i have one if not both of these as well, but i also have pretty sever social anxiety so the thought of calling somewhere to make an appointment then actually going and talking to someone stops me from being tested.
Same, (though I don't have kids)! I had had people suggest I could be autistic for years because I had a kind of flat affect and didn't really 'get' social norms, which I brushed off because 'of COURSE I'm not autistic silly! I'm a crazy artist type - I'm not analytical lol'. Then I got sent a video about AuDHD and how it differs from straight up ADHD or Autism and uh... yeah. Turns out that was me to a T. I did more reading and sought out more videos and it was like putting on glasses for the first time, how much clearer a lot of things about my life suddenly got. I asked my therapist what she thought about it and if I should try for a diagnosis and she said essentially 'oh yeah, that sounds like you for sure, what some recommendations?'. When I finally got evaluated for real, guess who was in fact exceedingly AuDHD? :D
I got assessed for autism a few years after my ADHD diagnosis. I definitely have both, but it's interesting that I talked a bunch about my autism traits in the interview for my ADHD assessment (while I was still conflating ALL my traits as ADHD) and the clinician noted them but didn't even mention that I could be autistic. I had to find that out for myself then wait a long time to be assessed. I'm so glad I did, though. It's been an interesting journey filled with "wtf why did nobody notice" but this is a common AuDHD millennial experience unfortunately. VHS tapes of me from childhood which show me being candid display a VERY obviously autistic child (and the doctors assessing me said it was very helpful).
I'm 50 and self-diagnosed autistic within the last year. (I've since had the pleasure of getting involved in the autistic community, and omfg, it is clear that these are my people.) I'm nearing the end of my career, so I'm not sure it's worth getting an assessment, with 5-year wait lists here, but autism sure does explain my life up to now. I wish you the best - autism is not a bug, it's a feature.
Both of my kids are on the spectrum, and my younger is AuDHD. I was screened for autism and OCD when I was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 36. Only got the ADHD diagnosis, but was told that my OCD and autism symptoms were most likely driven by the anxiety that comes with living with undiagnosed ADHD and no support for my whole life. I had found some coping strategies on my own and stuck to them really rigidly because that was the only way I could survive.
Just my experience, but I wanted to share because, well...solidarity.
This is so real 😭 I got assessed first for anxiety and also walked out with an ADHD diagnosis, came back a year or so later because my mom suspected that ADHD wasn’t the only thing and sure enough I’ve got Autism too 😃👍
I am 30 and just had my 3rd AUDHD assessment appointment this evening. I have another one coming up before I finally find out if I have either. My mom is in her 50s and is now suspecting she has ADHD. Looking at our family, almost everyone is either confirmed or suspected neurodivergent.
Hope the process goes well for you if you go down that route
I've considered myself to be autistic for nearly a decade. I went to go down the diagnosis path, and wound up getting my ADHD diagnosis first (I thought for sure I didn't have ADHD, but my reaction to meds is pretty conclusive). I'm in the final stages of my autism assessment now.
It's a wild ride.
Got my ADHD diagnosis as a child, spent my younger years hopping from medication to medication since each one did what it was supposed to but also came with big side effects that, to this day, make me have an aversion to ADHD medication (nothing against it for those who can’t function properly without it but I don’t go near the stuff). As an adult, hearing many of the videos from people who have both ADHD and Autism I keep hearing similarities to my own experiences…
After a life time of unhelpful therapy and a diagnosis of PTSD my partner was shocked when we were going through the ASD diagnostic process for our child, it was like a light was switched on in his brain screaming this is me!
Come to find out that processing disorder was even written in his mental health school notes as a child yet an adult diagnosis wasn’t made until he was 45.
Trying to find a therapist that deals with both where we live has been a nightmare.
Come on in...The water’s fine! Lots of helpful tips and tricks from generous creators.
Yep. Learning about actual autism and ADHD (so not the stereotyped movie and book cliches) had me going "Huh, makes sense" then a few weeks later "oh Oh OH *OH* uhhhhhh, that REALLY makes sense". Unfortunately my attempts to even pursue evaluation have gone nowhere because "you graduated from high school". And no, no one who has said that has checked I actually did.
Both of my parents actually put the finger on their own diagnoses when we started looking into getting me diagnosed, and from what I've heard this is a fairly common path for non-typical neurodivergence profiles (pretty sure I don't like that term, but I mean the people who present neurodivergence not the way it traditionnally presents ? People whose profile/circumstances meant they weren't identified as kids?) . Hope you get the answers to your questions and with those answers some comfort/relief, or both depending on what you need :)
It's like $2k to get evaluated as an adult in my area. My insurance will not cover it at all. 😢
Hi. Come to New Zealand - it's $700, and the waiting time is at least a year because we are so short of psychiatrists. 😅
Worth exploring VERY Carefully. Childhood trauma symptoms can sometimes present very much like Autism. Just something to bear in mind as I know you have talked about a difficult relationship with your father and growing up in poverty. Have a wonderful voyage of self discovery. ❤
Honestly, being ADHD and something else is really difficult. It was only later in life that I found out I had ADHD plus generalised anxiety and depression disorder. So, all those times I would freak out about something not being perfect were actually panic attacks. All those times I couldn't eat, didn't feel hungry or just worked straight through lunch was actually stress-induced response of my disorder. Would have been nice to know that
One of us! One of us!
I have AuDHD. My therapist also recommended the place I got evaluated from
I’m pursuing an AuDHD Dx myself; I’ll be 42 later this month and got an ADHD Dx about 3 years ago. I’m so much like my two AuDHD niblings.
Welcome to the club!
In all seriousness, though; I was diagnosed with autism several years ago at age 25. Since then I, like you, didn’t fit in with other women with autism. The only women I felt a strong similarity to were AuDHD women. I’m almost certain I have adhd too, now, as does my psychiatrist. Now I just gotta figure out how to deal with this information.
I'm undiagnosed and honestly believe I have AuDHD. My life and thought processes mirror diagnosed ppl; I'm drawn and relate to ppl and fictional characters that are neurodivergent coded. I would like to be formally diagnosed for times when life feels harder. I hear it's so expensive and time consuming tho. It's hard enough doing "easy" stuff. Taking action steps to do the harder stuff feels impossible when I have to focus on more immediate life stuff without much of a support system.
I'm blown away how easy it is for you to get evaluated. In the UK it's a 5 year wait list
I've realized I likely have both but am terrified to pick up the phone to call the doctors 😂😂
Yeeaaahhhh, Baby! Welcome to the Frickin' Amazing Club!! :D :D :D
I want to say something, but I am at a lose for words, never really been good at this kind of thing, but good luck and I hope you get the answers you are looking for.
My first ever psychiatric appointment the psychiatrist agreed that I’m AuDHD. First time meeting talked for an hour and half total in the first 30 minutes she agreed. Of course I brought it up, but agreeing in the first 30 minutes is still crazy as normally psychiatrists and therapists take time before beinng like “yep this is indeed ___”
Yeah, um, both my kids have been diagnosed AuDHD in college (one just very recently), and this sounds familiar. The conception of it when I was a kid was VERY different, and there's no way I would've qualified back then. Still trying to decide if I want to bother with testing.
Best of luck! Remember to give yourself an adjustment period to let everything sink in either way. One of the kids was...kind of shocked by the tester's description of how she presents herself.
I would not be remotely shocked, especially when you have two kids on the Spectrum. A lot of ND parents have this experience. I am childless, but I was diagnosed with ADHD and "Asperger's" (technically, but I refer to myself as AuDHD or ND) late in life.
Welcome to the tribe brother!
Lol Autism and ADHD family here! I’m a 37 year old women and have just been diagnosed with ADHD, though I strongly suspect I’m also on the spectrum. My son is autistic, as well as my niece, nephew, brother, sister, possibly father…. I’m liking my chances lol
I have ADHD but I am introvert😂 Weird combo. All my life people thought that I was just broken. I struggled with socialization even at home. I was constantly afraid of saying something wrong or breaking the things. The punishment for such "misbehaving" was pretty hursh in my family. And right now I have a daughter with autism and ADHD
I am also in this rabbit hole.
I have a long list of weird things about me that may one day be helpful for a diagnosis. However, I don't have great mental health coverage so - maybe never. At least I'll have my list. 🙃
My psychologist says that I can't be AuDHD because I can figure out how other people might feel sometimes, and because I can fight the urge to interrupt her most of the time.
Hey cool!! Thanks for sharing! I am late identified for both ADHD and Autism. Whether you stay self-diagnosed or get a pro-dx, welcome to the community!
Out of the many resources I poured through in my research 🤓 I want to suggest one video in particular from Mom On The Spectrum who's also here on CZcams. In it she discusses various reasons for wanting an evaluation. It was incredibly helpful when I was deciding whether or not to seek a pro dx.
Us neurospicy peeps aren't great at pumping the brakes, kind of by definition 😂 With that in mind, please don't feel pressured to book an appointment or get a pro opinion right away unless you want to and it will serve you well. Take your time. Happy continued self-learning! It's a roller coaster 🕺🏻 🎢 🤟🏻 🛸
I'm also starting the process of getting AuDHD diagnosis!
How it took me so long as a mom and sister of autistic boys is not a wonder, cause I'm a female who was a teen in the 90s.....
I thought I had adhd so got tested. No diagnosis. A few years later, tested again, still no diagnosis but a referral to get tested for autism. Got my autism diagnosis and asked them about that adhd I still thought I had. New test, yay AuDHD! (But not very yay, still struggling often) Neurodivergence can be so weird
Do you ever wonder if all this stuff is over-diagnosed? I remember learning in psychology that you only really need to worry about a diagnoses like this or consider it if it’s affecting your work or every day life. Otherwise, it’s hard to tell if you really have anything or if you’re just a little off from “the norm” (whatever that is).
As for better understanding your kids, kudos on reading up on stuff and taking that extra step, reading can certainly be helpful in these situations. However, you might find that they don’t find their diagnoses to really describe things that represent them well either though (just as you felt with ADHD), and the best way to understand them better might come from simply spending more time with them.
My son has autism. My ex has autism. So I figured he got it from his dad. Then I married a woman with autism. I took the reigns as the Neurotypical of the family. I'd go to school events and marvel at how weird all the other parents were in my son's special education class, but not me! Nope, I was Neurotypical. Then one day I was watching a Tony Attwood video about autism in girls and it was like watching my life flash before my eyes in Powerpoint form, and I burst into tears. All those years getting relegated to the 'weird girls' group at school by the other kids and now I find out I was a weird girl, too. 😭 I've come to terms with it, but my doctor said I don't need an evaluation because I don't need medication or work accommodations (no job atm) so I can just be autistic and it's fine. I'm stuck in this limbo of not having a diagnosis but not being able to get one. But I completely understand how you feel! When you uncover this whole world of information that no one ever talks about and that you never knew existed and it happens to describe you perfectly. It's a lot to take in. Sometimes I wonder if I have ADHD, too, but there's so much of it that doesn't really fit me. But if you feel the same way and you do have it, then maybe it's not a monolith.
I’m in the middle of the EXACT same journey!
Welcome! The discovery of the intrinsic nature of my brain has been the best thing to ever happen to me. 🎉