BEST OF CHILDHOOD STORIES

Sdílet
Vložit
  • čas přidán 9. 12. 2022
  • Subscribe for more Oney Plays ► bit.ly/oneyshole
    OneyPlays best of childhood stories compilation.
    Follow Oney Plays on Twitter: / oneyplays
    Our Merch Store ► oneyplays.store
    Follow Oney Plays on Facebook: / oneyplays
    Follow Oney on Instagram: / oneysc
    Subscribe to Oney Cartoons! ► bit.ly/1i9kZFO
    Check out my Music Channel! ♫ bit.ly/1i8zi3z
    Follow me on Facebook: / oneysvideohole
  • Hry

Komentáře • 1,2K

  • @anonhaha400
    @anonhaha400 Před rokem +4518

    The story of Chris as a 9 year old sending the few pounds to get the cloud strife Keychain and they actually sending it to him, that makes me smile and go "aww" every time

  • @crawford6807
    @crawford6807 Před rokem +6968

    It brings a big green smile to my face to hear the boys talk about the memories implanted in them as test tube babies.

    • @bayersbluebayoubioweapon8477
      @bayersbluebayoubioweapon8477 Před rokem +283

      Hey that’s not funny I’m a test tube baby and our memories are actually bred into us not implanted contrary to popular belief

    • @Shitbird3249
      @Shitbird3249 Před rokem +106

      My teeth keep turning brown, holding all this shit inside me, my feelings swell up like my my prostration it only causes pain.

    • @fancyincubus
      @fancyincubus Před rokem +14

      I'm just happy Chris ripped off a church basket

    • @alanacidmyer
      @alanacidmyer Před rokem +3

      Helo Crawford

    • @lorenarodriguez1961
      @lorenarodriguez1961 Před rokem +1

      Test tubes

  • @somerandolad
    @somerandolad Před rokem +5464

    I'm convinced Zach was just born a nose, and gradually grew arms and legs over time.

    • @MrJurgenman
      @MrJurgenman Před rokem +231

      My little teratoma

    • @rish1656
      @rish1656 Před rokem +69

      @@MrJurgenman Zack is a modern day version of Henrietta Lacks

    • @slotho122
      @slotho122 Před rokem +69

      Zach has the smallest nose in real life, though.

    • @legoyoda_
      @legoyoda_ Před rokem +59

      @@MrJurgenman teratomar

    • @merilynne1548
      @merilynne1548 Před rokem +47

      @@slotho122 and he’s tall af, taller than Tomat

  • @constructionskeleton8030
    @constructionskeleton8030 Před rokem +5334

    I love how Adam constantly sounds like he just woke up

  • @burnzy3210
    @burnzy3210 Před rokem +4488

    the story of little irish chris writing a letter to buy a final fantasy key chain is adorable LOL

    • @pinkuparfum
      @pinkuparfum Před rokem +401

      And the fact that the company sent it to him in the end for his troubles. Amazing

    • @Debilm4nzs-zu9bc
      @Debilm4nzs-zu9bc Před rokem +17

      @@pinkuparfum do you have a timestamp

    • @HiHi-st3mz
      @HiHi-st3mz Před rokem +68

      @@Debilm4nzs-zu9bc 1:37

    • @taxisalad
      @taxisalad Před rokem +115

      I genuinely thought he was gonna say they just took his money, it took a nice turn

    • @Mizikame
      @Mizikame Před rokem +69

      Back when companies had ‘Tegridy

  • @SkilesHasFun
    @SkilesHasFun Před rokem +1276

    I like to imagine Adam is just sleeping in the corner of the room, and every so often they violently shake him awake and yell, "ADAM QUICK TELL A TALE FROM YOUR CHILDHOOD"

    • @franklinwebber4412
      @franklinwebber4412 Před rokem +73

      Adam = lil sleepy

    • @Locust13
      @Locust13 Před 10 měsíci +51

      ADAM WAKE UP THEY HIT THE PENTAGON ADAM TURN ON THE TV THEY HIT THE OH MY GOD!!

    • @Thepenarmy01
      @Thepenarmy01 Před 8 měsíci +24

      Only for Adam, with heavily lidded eyes to say “when i was a kid i hosed my kitchen.”

    • @bigbrothertw
      @bigbrothertw Před 7 měsíci +13

      they keep him in a cage and feed him hash browns and only let him out to slay gash

    • @majorghoul9017
      @majorghoul9017 Před 7 měsíci +11

      He's like Candy Cadet from FNAF 6. You just put a coin in him and listen to whatever he has to say

  • @JannaJaNaiPleaseKillMe
    @JannaJaNaiPleaseKillMe Před rokem +2031

    Love that the video starts immediately with "I got in trouble because I hosed my kitchen"

    • @maninthemask6275
      @maninthemask6275 Před rokem +145

      I like how is just like “this feels good, this is fun.”

    • @yungskeleton-wotvffbe8939
      @yungskeleton-wotvffbe8939 Před rokem +71

      Adam is the funniest guy in oneyplays I wish he'd show up more.

    • @thundercockjackson
      @thundercockjackson Před rokem +7

      oh fuck, hey guy

    • @capacitatedflux
      @capacitatedflux Před rokem +28

      Lyle's incredulity during the pillow bit with Adam sustains me.
      "If you looked, but that'd be ghey."

    • @MrTheBigNoze
      @MrTheBigNoze Před rokem +33

      Adam is what you get when you turn the charisma slider to max but intelligence to minimum

  • @cronst6352
    @cronst6352 Před rokem +1554

    Adams stories that gradually evolve as he remembers them in real time

    • @homiejack
      @homiejack Před rokem +180

      Yeah like "I always thought alien computers would be awesome but I got one and it sucked" followed by "I threw it down the stairs"

    • @krampuskardashian5890
      @krampuskardashian5890 Před rokem +88

      They're procedurally generated.

    • @BlackMoonHowls
      @BlackMoonHowls Před rokem +9

      @@krampuskardashian5890 Someone got it.

    • @lucasottens8506
      @lucasottens8506 Před 5 měsíci +2

      It's called "lying."

  • @gag5y
    @gag5y Před rokem +2633

    Zach as a Harlequin baby emits an unsettling, yet familiar aura...

    • @Peradoot
      @Peradoot Před rokem +241

      Thought it was just him as a young homunculus

    • @mikekazz5353
      @mikekazz5353 Před rokem +138

      @@Peradoot if That's the case then a Russian Bible would be his kryptonite.

    • @brospros6327
      @brospros6327 Před rokem +35

      Reminds me of smiling friends

    • @mooks500
      @mooks500 Před rokem +40

      @@Peradoot I think it's a fetus

    • @davidr3224
      @davidr3224 Před rokem +52

      @@mikekazz5353 it's actually a chinese to russian dictionary, which is probably weirder

  • @rickkcir2151
    @rickkcir2151 Před rokem +1465

    I love the voice Chris gives himself as a child.

  • @SMA2343
    @SMA2343 Před rokem +1438

    I love the story of Chris sending money through the mail for the final fantasy key chain. It’s such a sweet thing for the company to do

    • @Mizikame
      @Mizikame Před rokem +67

      Back when companies had ‘Tegridy

    • @EsteemedReptile
      @EsteemedReptile Před rokem +11

      They threw their learning lab at him.

    • @gabagoolingeverywhere
      @gabagoolingeverywhere Před rokem

      i remember I was 14 when my ZombiU (remember that) copy was defunct and we lost the receipt so i wrote this overly emotional and heartfelt letter to ubisoft with the help of my brother to get a working copy, a week later i received another copy with this really sweet response saying that they had to break the company rules to send me this copy and how touched they were by my letter lmao. to this day i still think about it and how sweet it all is even if we were a bit manipulative, that employee absolutely rocks and i'm super thankful. wish I didn't lose this letter.

    • @himwhoisnottobenamed5427
      @himwhoisnottobenamed5427 Před rokem +25

      @@Mizikame Back when your ass didn’t get robbed by the postal worker.

    • @Mizikame
      @Mizikame Před rokem +1

      @@himwhoisnottobenamed5427 Facts 💯

  • @sycomonky4993
    @sycomonky4993 Před rokem +348

    “Don’t judge her but she hit me for that one”💀

  • @wadewilkos7048
    @wadewilkos7048 Před rokem +631

    For anyone curious, the ketchup was most likely fermenting in the cupboard which slowly built up pressure over time until it exploded

    • @JohnSmith-gu2vj
      @JohnSmith-gu2vj Před rokem +186

      For anyone interested in the TRUTH: it was DEFINITELY ghosts

    • @peterthehorseishere
      @peterthehorseishere Před rokem +30

      ketchup just like me frfr

    • @ding-dong_bing-bong
      @ding-dong_bing-bong Před rokem +46

      "cUpBoArD pReSsUrE?"

    • @beez3620
      @beez3620 Před rokem +7

      yeah that happened to me too when i was living in a shitty student apartment, the ketchup blew up from inside the cupboard

    • @homa_impsin
      @homa_impsin Před rokem +8

      then explain the self-setting clock

  • @mTwJARhead
    @mTwJARhead Před rokem +1201

    Can't wait for the release of Oney babies

    • @Dill_Pickle5760
      @Dill_Pickle5760 Před rokem +77

      Little Oneys 😂

    • @TrashyBashy
      @TrashyBashy Před rokem +180

      They’ll make your dreams come true

    • @G4Bunnygirlextrainseason2
      @G4Bunnygirlextrainseason2 Před rokem +44

      Its coming this spring and it's playing at 4:30 A.M. with three timeslots to 5:30 A.M. with ding,dong and Julian coming on at 6:00 A.M.

    • @mTwJARhead
      @mTwJARhead Před rokem +31

      @@G4Bunnygirlextrainseason2 right after the smiling friends block

    • @shanemiller1182
      @shanemiller1182 Před rokem +2

      @@TrashyBashySHUT UP!
      Cartoons

  • @JargohhYT
    @JargohhYT Před rokem +1050

    Funny how they left out the part where Tomar tells the story about his twin brother that was sick that one winter and him and his mom used him for a stew

    • @blackwingdragon1
      @blackwingdragon1 Před rokem +74

      Not to mention the story of how the Tomar emeralds came to be after he * gulp * you know... sacrificed that village when he was only seven.

    • @ye11owman29
      @ye11owman29 Před rokem +24

      Also it was crazy that they left out the part where Tomar tells the story how he basically re-enacted the baby scene from A Serbian film when his mom gave birth to his sister

    • @puhskinti9358
      @puhskinti9358 Před rokem +14

      I think it was a soup not a stew

    • @d3adxb0yxwalk1ng
      @d3adxb0yxwalk1ng Před rokem +11

      @@ye11owman29 thanks for reminding me, day ruined

    • @jelly_4_brainz
      @jelly_4_brainz Před rokem +10

      @@ye11owman29 that's sick, but something that tomar would in fact do

  • @shnitzel9052
    @shnitzel9052 Před rokem +659

    Ding-Dong saying his childhood stories are boring but then talking about the most insane teachers and kids is funny. Wish he would talk about them more lmao

    • @Ambipie
      @Ambipie Před rokem +52

      Not fun at the time, but fuckin insane

    • @jelly_4_brainz
      @jelly_4_brainz Před rokem +59

      UHHHHH RIPASS

    • @VLADPowder
      @VLADPowder Před rokem +44

      Staff like that is why kids end up lashing out at authority and developing negative thought patterns and bad habits. It's truly tragic

    • @jelly_4_brainz
      @jelly_4_brainz Před rokem +16

      @@VLADPowder *UH RIPASS*

    • @anonymouslucario285
      @anonymouslucario285 Před 6 měsíci +1

      ​@WheedPowder you think Ding Dong lashes out at people?

  • @dippin4dots
    @dippin4dots Před rokem +451

    The "9 year old Chris gets a Cloud Strife Key-chain" makes me oddly happy for him. Hope the Cloud Strife Key-Chain knocks at the OneyPlays HQ so he can guest star.

  • @heretics_archive
    @heretics_archive Před rokem +304

    I love how ding dong thought Chris was a child and the wait you did that last year was so genuine

    • @djdee6386
      @djdee6386 Před rokem +51

      still love “How could you be such a fool!”

    • @JRBDWD
      @JRBDWD Před rokem

      @@djdee6386 Ding Dong talks like a SJW,an nwordamerican was going to stab Chris for something he thought.

    • @heretics_archive
      @heretics_archive Před rokem +22

      @@djdee6386 the yeah boyyy kills me every time

    • @lowhp_comic
      @lowhp_comic Před rokem +15

      @@heretics_archive "y-you, haha ha-OH NO!"

  • @mjrtaurus2714
    @mjrtaurus2714 Před rokem +446

    Ding Dong talking about his school experiences really puts his very dry and jaded mannerisms into perspective. I'm imagining a thousand yard stare with every joke or quip or bit he makes/contributes to.

    • @spiralgodking9877
      @spiralgodking9877 Před rokem

      That school was so fucked. God damn.

    • @thehammurabichode7994
      @thehammurabichode7994 Před 9 měsíci +23

      It might also explain some of his sexual disorders, as well. As far as I know, vore / cannibalism fetishes often come from feelings of isolation during a person's youth. They want to feel like they aren't alone, so the idea of consuming someone, or being consumed, becomes a fantasy. Ding Dong's stories convey the feeling of isolation very well.
      (Sorry for talking about something as personal as his sexuality. I just couldn't help but notice the parallel. Also, I understand that sexual disorders can arise independent of childhood trauma)
      EDIT: typo

    • @Visigoths
      @Visigoths Před 9 měsíci

      ​@@thehammurabichode7994over analyzing

    • @7U57HTJRYGHG
      @7U57HTJRYGHG Před 8 měsíci +12

      @@thehammurabichode7994 man i was and am a lonely fuck yet i didnt develop a taste for that, i did develop a taste for straight shota i dunno man having a fantasy about older women might be a mother issue lmao

    • @TheGimbishGlob
      @TheGimbishGlob Před 8 měsíci

      I am vomit

  • @professornerdout9042
    @professornerdout9042 Před rokem +962

    They should make a “BEST OF Zach leaving to use the bathroom” compilation. Honest to god you could probably fill 40+ minutes with that

    • @Ambipie
      @Ambipie Před rokem +59

      Probably drinks too much soda

    • @mspaint93
      @mspaint93 Před rokem +114

      He's probably lack toes in taller ants 🤣

    • @serious.lybobby
      @serious.lybobby Před rokem +11

      It’s be the Christmas miracle the world needs.

    • @absolutegarbage3654
      @absolutegarbage3654 Před rokem +29

      he's ripping a FAT bong lmao dude weed lol lmao haha

    • @joshh9521
      @joshh9521 Před rokem

      @@absolutegarbage3654 😂

  • @queencancerous5332
    @queencancerous5332 Před rokem +345

    Zach and Lyle breaking it to Chris that Lapland isn't where Santa lives will never not be funny

    • @Eemi_Seppala
      @Eemi_Seppala Před rokem +39

      I know right. It's hilarious how wrong they are.

    • @zzodysseuszz
      @zzodysseuszz Před 6 měsíci +5

      @@Eemi_Seppalathey’re right actually. Lapland is just where Santa goes to meet his side chick

    • @lusteraliaszero
      @lusteraliaszero Před 6 měsíci +1

      yeah it's greenland

  • @seansmith6255
    @seansmith6255 Před rokem +642

    26:19
    Cory being considered a child at 19 is 100% accurate

    • @asphaltshingles8594
      @asphaltshingles8594 Před rokem +40

      I would think that still is a child in some ways. A very old child, but still one nonetheless.

    • @rrsidentfrickhoe
      @rrsidentfrickhoe Před rokem +5

      @@asphaltshingles8594 I mean if you consider dependents children than yeah, but otherwise, not at all really

    • @lizzieandmocha1131
      @lizzieandmocha1131 Před rokem +42

      @@rrsidentfrickhoe I'm 22 and just graduated college and I still feel like a kid

    • @rrsidentfrickhoe
      @rrsidentfrickhoe Před rokem +2

      @Lizzie and Mocha That's alright I guess but I'm 23, almost done with college and feel like an adult. If it's just how you feel then I haven't been a kid since I was 16-17.

    • @lizzieandmocha1131
      @lizzieandmocha1131 Před rokem +29

      @@rrsidentfrickhoe It's not so much a good kind of feeling as it is more immaturity. A lot of that could be my own insecurity. I know I'm an adult and I know that I'm definitely not a kid, but sometimes, especially when I make a mistake or something I should've known better, I feel like it was a mistake a child would've made.

  • @failsrus96
    @failsrus96 Před 10 měsíci +123

    17:07 you can hear the relief in Tomar's voice when he heard that, he was legit worried Adam got bad touched or something

    • @Yetithehuman
      @Yetithehuman Před 2 měsíci +8

      Tomar seems like a genuine good friend to them, and human being

    • @mlgcactus1035
      @mlgcactus1035 Před 29 dny

      Thata whatbhe wants toy to believe ​@@Yetithehuman

  • @AMetalWorld
    @AMetalWorld Před rokem +1792

    You know, Cory says and does a lot of absurdly donkey-brained shit for which he is appropriately ripped on, but loving Mario romhacks to the point where he learns how to make one, sends it to a content creator he’s a fan of, and is subsequently mercilessly and publicly mocked for it to the point where he loses passion for his hobby is definitely not one of those things. Hopefully that guy gets like testicular torsion or is trapped forever in a psychological hellscape of his own creation or something
    Great compilation btw, one of the best imo

    • @sillycookie
      @sillycookie Před rokem +187

      I agree. People can be so awful.

    • @mesotolioma5089
      @mesotolioma5089 Před rokem +59

      By "that guy" you mean Cory?

    • @spyrorocks55
      @spyrorocks55 Před rokem +8

      does anyone have any idea who it is?

    • @mesotolioma5089
      @mesotolioma5089 Před rokem

      @@spyrorocks55 Oh wow, someone here is already planning on bullying, harassing and doxxing people, don't get ahead of yourself boy

    • @ThyrsoidRug4817
      @ThyrsoidRug4817 Před rokem +217

      @@mesotolioma5089 he means the stupid content creator that made fun of Cory

  • @benbing3926
    @benbing3926 Před rokem +374

    I always love seeing the custom Chris-and-Zach drawings for the best-of thumbnails

    • @jackystarboi3152
      @jackystarboi3152 Před rokem +43

      Zach be looking like he bit someone and goes "y e u h"

  • @artsyfartsynerdywordy
    @artsyfartsynerdywordy Před rokem +250

    Chris writing the Mario movie as an essay in school reminds me of the time I sent the lyrics of “America, Fuck Yeah” and “Freedom Isn’t Free” to soldiers in Afghanistan as an assignment in school. They were supposed to be thank you letters but no one ever checked them before we sent them. I totally got away with it and a couple of soldiers probably got a good little chuckle.

    • @maverickREAL
      @maverickREAL Před rokem +4

      May I be a nerd and request the timestamp?

    • @mezzeara5993
      @mezzeara5993 Před rokem +53

      I can tell you now as someone with a ridiculously large amount of familial military personnel, they will tell that story at parties for the rest of their lives

    • @artsyfartsynerdywordy
      @artsyfartsynerdywordy Před rokem +25

      @@mezzeara5993 this is what I was hoping for!!

    • @sdivine13
      @sdivine13 Před 2 měsíci +3

      I woulda brought that shit back and framed it.

  • @hoggo3789
    @hoggo3789 Před rokem +165

    I will never not smile in glee at "daddy wouldn't by me a super split"

    • @knotbots
      @knotbots Před rokem +12

      The way he huffs and puffs exactly like he did back then really sells it

    • @skeeballz
      @skeeballz Před 7 měsíci +11

      "wook at yoself in da miwwoh dahtty 👁👄👁🥄"

  • @sabNavyA
    @sabNavyA Před rokem +222

    I used to think Mario was real and lived in California, and I racked up my mom's phone bill trying to call him

    • @daltonbecker4494
      @daltonbecker4494 Před rokem +17

      What would you have done if Mario picked up the phone?

    • @sabNavyA
      @sabNavyA Před rokem +42

      @@daltonbecker4494 I probably would have squeed and XD'd

    • @__sike__
      @__sike__ Před 9 měsíci +25

      My brain rotted from watching the Super Mario Super Show all day and I was convinced Mario and Luigi lived in New York and could turn into little cartoon guys. Spent nights on the family computer trying to find their number.

    • @Thepenarmy01
      @Thepenarmy01 Před 8 měsíci +10

      That’s like saying Santa Claus lives in Missouri.

    • @gab_e7091
      @gab_e7091 Před 4 dny

      Lmao

  • @nickstod5789
    @nickstod5789 Před rokem +147

    All of DingDong's school stories are just pure, raw and unfiltered American public school

    • @LifeOutward
      @LifeOutward Před 7 měsíci +6

      *American blue city public schools

    • @anuses
      @anuses Před 3 měsíci +1

      @@LifeOutward real

  • @galacticpopcorn9981
    @galacticpopcorn9981 Před rokem +60

    “Alienware computers suck, I had one”
    “Why? What happened to it?”
    “I dropped it down the stairs”

  • @GoogleRuinsAnythingItTouches

    34:38
    "I was lieing there. My dad asked me what I was doing, and I said "just lieing here." It was the worst day ever."
    The most Irish of Irishman stories.

  • @jelly_4_brainz
    @jelly_4_brainz Před rokem +199

    The "hosed my kitchen" story makes me think of the time when I was like 7-9 and did the same thing but with sugar and black sugar ants got everywhere

    • @jelly_4_brainz
      @jelly_4_brainz Před rokem +21

      I did it in the living room and my then stepmom whooped my ass

    • @yossarian00
      @yossarian00 Před rokem +35

      I did the same with biscuits cause I got convinced ants would shrink me to their size and torture me if I wasn't nice to them after seeing a dumb movie.
      Surprisingly I haven't yet developed schizophrenia

    • @jelly_4_brainz
      @jelly_4_brainz Před rokem +29

      @@yossarian00 holy shit you thought you was the ant bully???? Your story's better than mine I just thought the ants would worship me and take me as their ruler for gifting them copious amounts of granulated sugar

    • @yossarian00
      @yossarian00 Před rokem +8

      @@jelly_4_brainz I don't remember anything about the movie, only the primal fear it caused in me. Thanks for reminding me what it's called by the way lmfao

    • @jelly_4_brainz
      @jelly_4_brainz Před rokem +2

      @@yossarian00 Sylvester Stallone ant lol

  • @cyber_nuggets8302
    @cyber_nuggets8302 Před rokem +120

    I love how the monkey story was like 2 years ago but it's still in the childhood stories compilation

    • @jaden_bricker
      @jaden_bricker Před rokem +31

      It was a build up to Julian’s ACTUAL childhood story of dressing up like a kkk member

  • @duckwithlegs6953
    @duckwithlegs6953 Před rokem +67

    One girl got hit by a car at my school and all she got was a Facebook post, but a massive shrine was made in the hallway along with a mural on the wall to commemorate the life of Kobe Bryant

    • @rustymug500
      @rustymug500 Před 7 měsíci +11

      That’s crazy because I had a good friend get hit by a car the day Kobe died, my school didn’t do a lot for him either

  • @terrance6814
    @terrance6814 Před rokem +72

    "Me and my friend were big Naruto fans, so we used to fook our pillows together."

  • @reeceschroeder7685
    @reeceschroeder7685 Před rokem +94

    It puts a huge brown smile on my face how these guys influenced us all to speak on the internet like this, I've been watching them since I was a little homunculus

  • @peterrusso9123
    @peterrusso9123 Před rokem +115

    Chris's childhood and zach's childhood stories just made everything make a whole lot more sense holy shit haha

    • @BlackLynx4607a
      @BlackLynx4607a Před rokem +28

      They're so self-conscious about it too, just doing shit most children do. No wonder they love cringe videos so much.

  • @sorrymommy8190
    @sorrymommy8190 Před rokem +88

    I like that Chris is Irish, and yet needs to put on an Irish accent.

    • @lillyocarroll
      @lillyocarroll Před rokem +12

      He has an accent all the time ones more stereotyped

    • @br3akstuff
      @br3akstuff Před rokem +4

      ​@@lillyocarroll Yeah but it has certainly become very neutral over time compared to how it was

    • @lillyocarroll
      @lillyocarroll Před rokem +9

      @@br3akstuff to be fair most Irish accents are neutral it’s only certain part of Ireland that are real strong and Americans kinda think it’s one accent that’s just all nasal and farmer like yknow but ya since he’s been in America he’s picked up on the lad’s mannerisms in speech as most do

  • @ericcrowley2492
    @ericcrowley2492 Před rokem +181

    The keychain story is adorable

  • @itsumayo
    @itsumayo Před 10 měsíci +36

    I’m convinced Adam wasn’t born and instead just randomly fell from the sky like Mr. Bean

  • @trashxsenpai9172
    @trashxsenpai9172 Před rokem +106

    Hearing Lyle laugh like a manic when Adam tells any story is wonderful.

  • @IslanderIsaac
    @IslanderIsaac Před rokem +170

    I loved Zach since he was a little homunculus.

  • @niravathu7353
    @niravathu7353 Před rokem +61

    "I got in trouble as a kid because I hosed down my kitchen" said in that glorious slurred speech made me holler in absolute ecstacy

  • @gavynbrandt
    @gavynbrandt Před rokem +108

    From the classic keychain story to dumping gallons of water on people and fucking pillows in the same room as your friend

    • @alfalldoot6715
      @alfalldoot6715 Před 6 měsíci +4

      All of these are in the first 15 minutes mind you

  • @thehumancomedy3891
    @thehumancomedy3891 Před rokem +61

    1:51:49 Cory's experimenting stories and chris' reaction will always crack me up

  • @caitybug8424
    @caitybug8424 Před rokem +29

    Chris attempting to scream "he went CHRIIIIIS" like 8 times fucking sent me

    • @Patrick.Weightman
      @Patrick.Weightman Před rokem +2

      I felt that so deep that I was getting legitimately frustrated for him lol

  • @meatmanmagoo
    @meatmanmagoo Před rokem +95

    Adam's Alienware laptop story are the perfect clips to use to get a general idea of him

  • @seansmith6255
    @seansmith6255 Před rokem +64

    Zach was an embryo until 2009 after encountering one of the 8 tomar emeralds
    He Whent through metamorphosis and gained skin, animation skill,the voice of an angel and the power of hypotheticals
    The process was traumatic for tomar and transformed him from a humble voice actor to the megalomaniac we know and love today

    • @seansmith6255
      @seansmith6255 Před rokem +9

      He also gained telekinetic and pyrokinetic making him as powerful as the reliable couple of blaze the cat and silver the hedgehog
      And with his autistic power coming from rocks
      Is the reason he is known as psychicpebbles

  • @mspaint93
    @mspaint93 Před rokem +294

    Coreys gay CD cases story makes me laugh so hard I can't breathe every fkn time. Before he elaborates it seems like he stuck an actual CD case in his butt like a coin slot and it's so insane. Plus using a trashbag as protection is so conceptually hilarious. And him just casually saying things that any normal person would never admit under threat

    • @inunekochan
      @inunekochan Před rokem +27

      Cory def stuck SOMETHING up his butt and got embarrassed lol 😂😂 l think thats why he went on about CD cases and trash bags - to try and hide the fact that he answered Chris' question honestly by saying something so ridiculous as a follow up. He totally wanted to derail his admittance to shoving things up his stinker lmao it gets a laugh outta me everytime 💀😂

    • @mspaint93
      @mspaint93 Před rokem +47

      @@inunekochan Lmao I genuinely believe he did what he said; it's too insane and so much more embarrassing than doing something actually gay. Saying he just did gay stuff and didn't like it wouldn't be that crazy if you've seen his art, but using a CD case holder with a trash bag is so unhinged I could be waterboarded for days and not admit to it

    • @inunekochan
      @inunekochan Před rokem +3

      @@mspaint93 Oh, yeah, he definitely appreciates peepees in a sense that he can draw them really good at least! But HOW would he even use a CD case is beyond me 😂😭😭 its nothing but sharp edges. Maybe the trash bag part was true - he coulda wrapped a small part of it around his finger or something else more phallic shaped bc he didnt have/wanted to waste a condom, but the CD? 😥 Its just so wild! lol In the end I suppose its just easier to accept he actually did use both, instead of wondering how, I guess 😂 and it never fails to make ppl laugh regardless lol xD

    • @CrazyLikeUhFox
      @CrazyLikeUhFox Před rokem +11

      @@inunekochan he’s talking about those CD cases that are a plastic pole on a pedestal that you stack the CDs on.

    • @inunekochan
      @inunekochan Před rokem +5

      @@CrazyLikeUhFox omg, that makes SO much more sense visually lmao 😂 Ofc leave it to Cory to not describe it accurately or say the right word like "pole/pedestal" should known lol

  • @MitridatedCarbon
    @MitridatedCarbon Před rokem +84

    Dingdong story about looking back at how bad highschool or school is, is relatable when you are in your 20s and realize a lot of teachers got mental health issues. Like I thought recently that if I met a person who acted like that in the middle of the street as an adult I would either think they are crazy or sue them.
    Like I'm pretty sure some were venting out their insecurities, like I think they all wanted to be uni professors but they couldn't so they bullied the kids out of frustration.

    • @Jerry-yd8pj
      @Jerry-yd8pj Před rokem +2

      Checks out.

    • @toximan2008
      @toximan2008 Před rokem +5

      Which is even sadder, because uni feels like even more of a daycare to teachers. I swear that college students are considerably more lazy and less motivated than high school kids ever seemed.

    • @MitridatedCarbon
      @MitridatedCarbon Před rokem +10

      @@toximan2008 it depends, but yeah, i've met a lot of university teachers who are there just like to get the paycheck, smell their own farts and act their own movie fantasies. Like, the moment I saw Whiplash I knew some dumb professor would have imitated the JJ Jameson guy like the edgy teens did for Joker.

    • @MitridatedCarbon
      @MitridatedCarbon Před rokem +9

      @@samk9693 yeah. Like, sometimes I imagine acting like my teachers with someone in their teens, and I feel lsad . Like bro, you are in your forties, stop laughing at the stuttering kid.

    • @berdlyistrans
      @berdlyistrans Před rokem +1

      @@samk9693 there are plenty of good teachers and at least in america considering the pay many do go into it to do good and make a difference, you just sound like you don't like teachers

  • @TheArcticBaboon
    @TheArcticBaboon Před rokem +45

    32:46 - in case anyone actually cares, Chris's and Naill's ketchup fermented
    Recently had the same happen to me, though the explosion happened just as I opened the bottle, and got it spraying all over myself. Essentially if you store bottled ketchup at too warm a temperature, the sugars in it can ferment into a gross, ketchupy alcohol. This causes gas to build up, and if left long enough (and it's one of those plastic clip top bottles), it'll blow the top open and "explode".

    • @Wyrm3
      @Wyrm3 Před rokem +3

      Can it get you drunk?

    • @Yoppy..
      @Yoppy.. Před rokem +1

      @@Wyrm3 yes but you need an inordinate amount of ketchup and probably added water to get enough alcohol to be viable. itll taste like shit and more likely than not make you sick

    • @TheArcticBaboon
      @TheArcticBaboon Před rokem +1

      @@Wyrm3 probably. I mean one of the ingredients used in prison hooch is ketchup.
      Would probably take several bottles of the stuff though, since how alcoholic something is depends on the original sugar content. Plus warm ketchup isn't always guaranteed to ferment, since I'm pretty sure some kind of yeast needs to be present.
      Also like I say, it's pretty gross

  • @sunnyd9884
    @sunnyd9884 Před rokem +61

    im glad that being a kid sucked for all of us and yet somehow we still miss it

    • @mrscruffles801
      @mrscruffles801 Před rokem +6

      I don't miss it at all, I don't know how you can

    • @Yoppy..
      @Yoppy.. Před rokem +15

      @@mrscruffles801 when you dont know anything, like a child, the world seems bigger and better than it is. ignorance REALLY IS bliss

    • @mrscruffles801
      @mrscruffles801 Před rokem +9

      @@Yoppy.. Yeah and when you have basically no rights and the people who you are told to trust and depend on will absolutely scream their heads off at you for the tiniest of infractions like you aren't just some kid making dumb mistakes. No, I much prefer being an adult and not having to deal with any of that.

    • @Yoppy..
      @Yoppy.. Před rokem +11

      @@mrscruffles801 lol what? i still get yelled at for the tiniest of infractions as an adult. things havent changed except my view on the world. children have it good, mostly.

    • @mrscruffles801
      @mrscruffles801 Před rokem +10

      @@Yoppy.. Yeah but as an adult you can tell those people to f off.

  • @alexbrown128
    @alexbrown128 Před rokem +27

    Love how this video goes between funny moments and childhood trauma dumps with no in-between

  • @Heliotay
    @Heliotay Před rokem +28

    1:40:15 the duck thing is real. My mother (born in the 80s) used to always call the koopas ducks and she still does.

  • @superfunnyjoke3922
    @superfunnyjoke3922 Před rokem +112

    I’m still confused how tomar could have been at all of the individual cast members births and was able to convince their parents to let him name them

    • @Wyrm3
      @Wyrm3 Před rokem +11

      He did dirty deeds, ones we should not speak of.

    • @puhskinti9358
      @puhskinti9358 Před rokem +11

      And he got them done dirt cheap

  • @noraonchair
    @noraonchair Před rokem +87

    listening this in the background while working is the funniest shit ever

  • @eddiemudie952
    @eddiemudie952 Před rokem +33

    One of my favorite Oney videos for years now is him trying to get more attention than his sister when they were little babby kids. He's only like 4 in the video but she's rambling about "the aester boony" and he pops up from the behind the couch like a goblin gnome elf and emits this energy that makes you go "Holy shit it's him. He has arrived. May god help us."
    RIP
    Innocence

  • @shottysteve
    @shottysteve Před rokem +51

    every time i hear that story about chris's mom trading the genesis for the toys i get stress pains in my back

    • @IBACAU123
      @IBACAU123 Před 6 měsíci

      hello

    • @shottysteve
      @shottysteve Před 6 měsíci +1

      @@IBACAU123 hi whats up

    • @IBACAU123
      @IBACAU123 Před 6 měsíci

      @@shottysteve what's up with the videos man?

  • @AtomicFlounder42
    @AtomicFlounder42 Před 8 měsíci +17

    It always touches me that in the first story, adam tells everyone not to judge her before telling them that she struck him over it

  • @eightcoins4401
    @eightcoins4401 Před rokem +36

    Cory getting shown Faces of Evil at like 7 explains alot about how he turned out

    • @swarler
      @swarler Před rokem +9

      yeah isn't that like the worst zelda game ever or something

    • @JI0MB
      @JI0MB Před 10 měsíci

      @@swarler it's the one they made all the YTPs of

  • @RS-jh2fz
    @RS-jh2fz Před rokem +34

    Adam's Alienware PC story is one of the greatest stories ever told.

  • @morgboat744
    @morgboat744 Před rokem +39

    at 1:54:45 he’s taking about Faces of Death which is really funny to me because it was my moms first R rated movie when she was like 8 years old. her older sister had no clue what it was lmao

    • @offchristianamr
      @offchristianamr Před rokem +9

      I swear everyone who lived through 80s is traumatized by that movie. I’ve had like four different adults in my family tell me at different points in my life how truly evil it is and to never, ever watch it. Their faces always had the most hollow, haunted expression when they talked about it.

    • @parsleyisthicc
      @parsleyisthicc Před rokem +2

      @@offchristianamr my dad use to own the entire collection on vhs. He only mentioned it nonchalantly when I was once bragging about fucked up movies I watched lol

    • @volnartheunforgiving3952
      @volnartheunforgiving3952 Před 3 měsíci +2

      Wait did he like accidentally refer to it as the like Zelda CDI game

  • @Bashuraptor
    @Bashuraptor Před rokem +9

    16:46 Tomar is such a good friend.

  • @alexfish477
    @alexfish477 Před rokem +49

    I'm glad these were all put together in one video. I've been stealing these stories and passing them off as my own. I was raised in a horrible orphanage. My childhood stories scare, sadden, and alienate my middle and upper-class friends and co-workers. I really would like to spare the feeling of being "bummed" by my childhood. Thank you!

  • @IndexInvestingWithCole
    @IndexInvestingWithCole Před rokem +130

    Too many best ofs. Brain destroyed. I now have ADHD from watching too much Oneyplays today.

    • @bigbird4481
      @bigbird4481 Před rokem +4

      I believe I'm the same, I read brain as "Brian" and was trying to figure out who's Brian

    • @meme_lord1715
      @meme_lord1715 Před rokem +4

      @@bigbird4481 you were just thinking of our lord and savior Brian griffin dw

  • @gregs8908
    @gregs8908 Před rokem +47

    Please bring back Adam, stories like the opener cannot be replicated

  • @GarbbCan
    @GarbbCan Před rokem +16

    9:34 this clip is what certified Adam as a member of the channel

    • @MorkedUP1
      @MorkedUP1 Před rokem +1

      This is seriously one of my favorite oney plays moments, lyles confusion and Chris’s laughter is the perfect cherry on top

  • @wlfrndz8743
    @wlfrndz8743 Před rokem +11

    9:34 is one of the craziest moments on oneyplays ever ngl. just comes out of nowhere

  • @fruitytuna2817
    @fruitytuna2817 Před rokem +29

    Me while the intros playing: "I hope Adam's story about hosing his kitchen down gets included"

  • @danieledgardo2122
    @danieledgardo2122 Před rokem +14

    22:27 Lyle - "Every cool person I know has been bullied. That is, to an extent, true."

  • @117johnpar
    @117johnpar Před rokem +9

    "Did I ever tell you about how Alienware computers suck"
    "No why?"
    "I dropped it down the stairs"

  • @Zancoth
    @Zancoth Před rokem +106

    I want Adam to appear more...
    I hope he's doing alright!

    • @blackwingdragon1
      @blackwingdragon1 Před rokem +31

      We JUST got a break from Cory, we can't handle that Adam right now.

  • @kevinsteel7875
    @kevinsteel7875 Před rokem +31

    I love that you can tell when Chris is telling the truth vs when he's telling a totally outrageous lie

  • @marcopivetta7796
    @marcopivetta7796 Před rokem +31

    DD sassing Chris and Julian wheezing in the background will never not be the funniest shit in the world

  • @ubermaster134
    @ubermaster134 Před rokem +14

    Listening to their school stories makes me grateful that my school system was much better, yeah there were a few teachers who were hardasses but they still cared and wanted to actually teach.

  • @capacitatedflux
    @capacitatedflux Před rokem +21

    The Oogie Boogie/Ape story is one of the best stories they've ever told.

  • @justsomeguy9280
    @justsomeguy9280 Před rokem +18

    Ding Dong's high-school probably could have gotten in MASSIVE legal trouble if the students had contacted the police

  • @norikofu509
    @norikofu509 Před rokem +10

    Everybody talking about Chris's story about how he sent some coins to a company and they answered but no one is talking about the God of War's composer being the nicest person on earth, that was so cool

  • @CrabCrow
    @CrabCrow Před rokem +10

    My mom was a middle school art teacher with computers in her classroom and I vividly remember the day she complained to me that her students were using the computer to look up "some kind of cartoon porn called hentai", I never had to hide my power level more than in that conversation.

  • @OmgItsTengu
    @OmgItsTengu Před rokem +42

    The spaghetti bird story is comedy gold

  • @kmpoffc
    @kmpoffc Před rokem +63

    Adam's stories were incredible

  • @Ayahuasca98
    @Ayahuasca98 Před rokem +95

    Damn, 4 “best of” videos in 1 day? Including a new gaslighting one? You’ve been on a roll, oneyplays.

    • @waterPsychiatrist
      @waterPsychiatrist Před rokem +9

      4? What world are you on

    • @CameronAB122
      @CameronAB122 Před rokem +43

      @@waterPsychiatrist bro we just got gaslit

    • @waterPsychiatrist
      @waterPsychiatrist Před rokem +26

      @@CameronAB122 Darn, they got me with the oldest brick in the took

    • @inunekochan
      @inunekochan Před rokem +2

      @@waterPsychiatrist the brownest oldest brick too

  • @lebbo88
    @lebbo88 Před 7 měsíci +5

    The "I hosed down my kitchen" one is one of my all time favorites.
    "Don't judge her, but she hit me for that one."
    Lmao!!

  • @defnothankjwimbleton3475
    @defnothankjwimbleton3475 Před 7 měsíci +7

    34:23 your father was clearly worried seeing you laying on the floor like that, Chris

  • @taxisalad
    @taxisalad Před rokem +9

    The way Chris recites dialogue from his wacky stories remind me of how people parody movie trailers, like;
    He's gonna do the thing
    "I'm gonna do the thing"
    But his life is turning around
    "My life is turning around!"

  • @cyrra8865
    @cyrra8865 Před rokem +18

    I felt that "don't judge her but she hit me"

  • @Asnort
    @Asnort Před rokem +16

    13:30 There's nothing wrong with playing pretend when you're a kid. It's totally normal so don't be so critical of yourselves.

  • @mr.boxhead4075
    @mr.boxhead4075 Před rokem +30

    I want Chris's dad to tell my a bedtime story.

  • @daniidanboy
    @daniidanboy Před rokem +16

    I couldnt stop laughing at imagining getting an expensive Alienware pc and unplugging it to just jump up and down and break it after a few days of having it

  • @fatdouglas4279
    @fatdouglas4279 Před rokem +20

    The nail in the eye story always gets my brain going. She must’ve thought that Chris threw a fingernail in her eye.

  • @mrblue69420
    @mrblue69420 Před rokem +10

    Chris's story about stealing and feeling guilty is exactly what happened to me as a kid with a ninja turtles action figure piece lmfao

  • @tahutoa
    @tahutoa Před rokem +8

    1:42:17 When I was in 3rd grade, before we took our turn rehearsing for the upcoming Christmas pageant I think, my friend told me about a tip he got from his dad for when you can't remember lyrics, which was to say the word "donut" over and over to the time of the music.
    He ended up getting in trouble for that, and I can remember watching him sing on the stage with other kids from near the first row of pews in front of the stage. I think what happened was they made him sing with the class under us.
    I have absolutely no idea what songs we would've been singing, so it wouldn't surprise me if it was original stuff for the play.
    One year for the Christmas play I was Mickey Mouse. I danced onto the stage, said one line, then danced back off.

  • @jacrispyjones5845
    @jacrispyjones5845 Před rokem +13

    The onyplays kingdom hearts playthrough is the best thing on the internet

  • @james-hu1rr
    @james-hu1rr Před rokem +22

    my favourite tomar childhood story was when he, as a 3 year old, sacrificed his identical twin to the sun god. his family doesn't talk about it anymore.

  • @konrad6688
    @konrad6688 Před rokem +45

    It’s genuinely disheartening hearing Ding Dong’s school stories, must’ve been genuinely terrible to deal with

  • @Cloud987600
    @Cloud987600 Před rokem +9

    Chris’s stories are so heartwarming n warm they really make you feel like you’ve known him for years. 1:56:40 lowers my blood pressure

  • @SqueakyToyBrain
    @SqueakyToyBrain Před rokem +7

    1:16:45 the way zach says what happened gets me every time. Not even the joke but that makes me grin

  • @emilycorona885
    @emilycorona885 Před rokem +27

    Im listening to this at work and it took every muscle in my face not to laugh at the fucking pillows story 🤣

  • @jferran7276
    @jferran7276 Před rokem +7

    “And I like shooting crows” kills me everytime

  • @TheLeoShmeo
    @TheLeoShmeo Před rokem +17

    finally an hour of zach’s homunculus years