I Improved My Social Skills As FAST As I Could - HERE'S HOW
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- čas přidán 4. 10. 2022
- This is the fastest way to improve your social skills... This video will show the most important step I took!
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JULIEN's INSTAGRAM: / julienhimself
Julien Blanc (AKA JulienHimself) is a Swiss-born, U.S.-based self-help speaker, entrepreneur and transformational coach.
Since 2010, he has been traveling around the world and has personally coached tens of thousands of clients face to face... Empowering them to create massive success in their lives!
His record-breaking programs Transformation Mastery, Transformation Mastery Live, Transformation Mastery Live Advanced, Transformation Mastery Academy & Transformation Mastery Mentoring help people around the world achieve the HEALTH, WEALTH, RELATIONSHIPS & HAPPINESS they deserve!
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I Improved My Social Skills As FAST As I Could - HERE'S HOW
High vibe communication secrets to increase your social skills!
In this video, Julien Blanc (AKA Julien Himself) reveals advanced secrets to improve your social skills in this social skills training!
Discover how to learn social skills and how to improve your social skills.
#julienblanc #julienhimself
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Subscribe to JulienHimself’s CZcams Channel: / @julienhimself
This is what I did to improve my social skills! 👉 This video will breakdown my social skills method!
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But for a job it’s different
Make it a goal to go up and talk to someone every day that you normally wouldn’t. That’s what my mentor taught me and he’s a master at it.
Yes! Nice!
I got into a chat with a supermarket assistant yesterday when normally I'd be to scared to even ask them for help looking for something. Setting myself little challenges that over time will give me more confidence.
@@jessterflies how’s you start the conversation?
@@hectorg362 i asked him if there was any of the cheaper coconut milk left. 😂 There wasn't and he apologised, I said it was fine and it went from there.
I'm actually doing this since the last month and holy shit it's a very good advice. Now I don't have no problem with talking to new people
Summary: work on the vibe. 80% of a good social interaction is just the vibe, or emotional skills. How do you do this? Let it go. Trust that you'll be able to handle whatever comes your way, trust you'll be able to find topics to talk about and talk about topics your actually interested in, and overall just trust yourself. I mean worse case you make a mistake and you learn from it, which really isn't that bad of a worse case now is it?
A one phrase summary for this whole video is: Let it go.
but how? How do you let go? What does it even mean?
@@usuarioanonimo85 this tbh everyone says let it go and nobody explains how
it really is about relaxing......anxiety fuck that you don't need that. Let that shit go HARD because it's so goddamn crippling (I learned this the hardway dealing with a socially anxious ex lol.) let that shit go! Nobody needs that crap. Relax and be. KNOW when to talk but also FEEL the situation and know when to shut your mouth. It's really a balancing act.
Legend
Thank you, I needed to hear this
I think what kills authenticity is ..analysis.When were kids our analitical skills were low..but as we grew analitical skills try and take over...making us to analyse almost each and every action we do socialy.
absolutely
Bingo. This is why being drunk allows us to be social vastly more easier, depending on the person obviously.
@@Toppgg-ci9er Jesus Christ this felt really fast
Bro u ain’t have to talk about me like that ☠️
Smart brother
I have massive social anxiety even when talking to my parents or friends. For me, what constantly helped is to be present at the moment and focus my attention to the other person. In that way, I would not be so overwhelmed with my thoughts of messing up and choking up my words.
I do the same thing and it works wonders but with adhd it really sucks 😢
@@dragoncalloway227meditate 15 min twice morning and night and pray to jesus christ ❤
That is mindfulness. It is a very good skill. But in my case being mindful gives me more anxiety so my mind is always distracted/dissociated
I have anxiety too
Get out your comfort zone embrace discomfort and expose yourself to the world
for most of my childhood i was sheltered, and not properly socialized. i never had many friends growing up, most of my memories of friends were not good. i feel so lost when it comes to my social skills. i’m trying my best, but it seems like i always manage to make someone uncomfortable, even though i think i’m saying/ doing normal things. i’m also genuinely so awkward and it’s so frustrating. everyday i come home very upset and mad at myself because i just wish i was normal. but i’m currently on a journey to improve my social skills!
You’re not alone, dumbass, I’m 55 and I’m struggling conversating (is that even a word)? even with my parents, now that is bad!
Btw I’m not calling you a dumbass, it’s just your title. 😂 see man , it’s the vibe.
Hey I don’t know if this will help but I was extremely popular very well socialized as a kid had lots of people that liked me then I moved to the US in 7-8th grade and my self esteem plummeted trying to fit in and be cool and my social skills were heavily dulled now I can only talk one on one and only with guys and as a straight male this is really tough I constantly think am I good enough and can’t hold conversations with anyone other than my family and one time in highschool one of the few times a girl talked to me she asked if I was gay I literally talked to her for a few minutes cause she knew my guy friend and this really hurt and I started to question my sexuality and all that is me started shutting down and being more of an introvert all my guy friends moved and covid happened middle of 9th grade and I did a program to take online college classes so I haven’t talked to anyone really new since 9th grade now I just graduated and I made a acquaintance mid graduation so my only real acquaintance through all highschool (lol) who even invited me to go party with him but even now I got his insta and haven’t messaged him back cause I don’t know what to do or hold conversations at a party and we only connected because we did drugs.but yeah this new anxiety has affected me so I haven’t even wanted to go get my drivers license or a job but I’m working on it really heavily and even plan to be a nurse to overcome this anxiety and if I can do it you can to (also another funny story is when my friend told me you need to talk to girls more and he was a jock and he legit got the most popular girl who just so happened to sit at my table to “help” me talk to girls and he said to look her in the eyes I did but I guess I did it to intensely and they both started to laugh and this is I guess this is what started me losing my social skills with girls and then that sexuality incident occurred)
I guess I think girls are too pretty to talk to me but I have made many online friends that were girls but in person just sucks 😂
Edit :sorry for lack of grammar is 3am
I feel this 100%. My mother would never let me spend the night at other kids’ houses, had a lot of “friends” who were really assholes and would end up bullying me, and all sorts of other things that really stunted my socialization and skills related to it.
You got this!!!
A great way to let go is to view social interactions as opportunities to improve rather than an attempt to impress someone.
Or even improve others (but not in a preachy way).
00:00 🎓 Social skills are developed through real-life experiences rather than just academic knowledge.
01:38 📚 To improve social skills, talk to more people than you naturally would.
02:05 💡 Authenticity is foundational to developing social skills.
04:15 🧠 Social skills consist of 80% emotional skills and 20% analytical skills.
06:03 🎈 Letting go is crucial for becoming socially adept.
08:00 💡 Vibe is more important than content in social interactions.
10:56 🛠 Work on authentic expression rather than relying solely on tips and tricks.
16:07 🌟 Prioritize sharing what genuinely interests you to create engaging conversations.
21:34 🎉 Authentic enthusiasm can make any topic engaging in conversation.
I feel like my more introverted friends fall into these exact pitfalls where they are concerned about showing their anxiety in more public settings when, with friends, they don't have that issue and are practically indistinguishable from an extrovert or someone who is great with people. It's like guys, just do that but with new people. Great talk!
Your program saved me 100+ books. I now know its not the answer! I tryed running away and reach toward things in order to avoid my inner shittiness. All i need to do is be authentic, let go and just have effortless fun
YES! Glad it's been so helpful for you! 🙌
@@JulienHimself I love you man. To see where you come from, your growth is so inspiring! Thank man for all that you are!
🙏🙏🙏
Masterclass. “Being yourself” is simple, but hard to understand.
You made an amazing job at explaining it.
Hey! Yesterday I felt like a social natural. Expressing myself without fear of judgement trusting my intuition. Best I’ve felt in 4 years. It happened either after catching up on sleep, releasing pent up anger, the exercise I did, or release of social resistance and I’m not sure which one, or where to find help.
Releasing/letting go is the way... 😉
I’ll work toward that. Thanks Julian!
The most successful moments are always a combination of things. So it was likely a mix of all of them. I consistently find I perform better socially when I'm eating healthy, getting good sleep, keeping on a work out schedule, keeping away from porn and keeping going out
how did u release this anger?
Funny how you watch all these motivational videos, exercise, discipline etc and this video just reminded me of a more natural way to be grounded and myself. Sure all those others are important but letting go, always gets me. Thanks man. Subscribed
Thank you! And welcome to the channel! 🙏
i get the joke but havent let go yet! Subscribed!
CZcams needs to push this awesome guy. Never seen so much realness.
🔥🔥🔥
WOOW THE START IS STR8 TO THE PT AND THE WAY U CONVEY URSELF IS JUST SO GRIPPING AND ATTENTION GRABBING i love you dude. Forever ♾️
Thanks! Glad this speaks to you! 🔥👊
This is the most important thing ive been trying to internalize. I thought I could be successful just with my technical knowledge & skills. Boy was I wrong.
Glad this was insightful! 🔥👊
I just realised, this dude has reavealed my strategy of being better socially😮 i mean he is talking exactly like my own thoughts.. listen to his advice, i can confirm is legit.
Hearing real-life success stories is so motivating! It's inspiring to know that others have gone through this journey and experienced positive transformations. Definitely feeling more empowered after watching this.
I feel social anxiety, I let it pass. I allow it. I expect it. It’s part of all of it. I remind myself it’s gonna happen and it’s totally cool. No more overthinking it.
In fact, I’m realizing when you take the lead in conversing, I learn everyone was looking for that leader. And, shockingly, the top conversation topic is this kind of value.
This is just insane. So much wisdom depicted in a super relatable way. Thank you
Thx bro! "Letting go" is probably the best advice I've heard on this topic.
Best video you've posted in years Julian! I received Ten-Game as a Christmas Present from a friend back in 2016, it changed my life.
7:10 Bro, perfect point! Once I analized and came up with this idea, I started to notice how I was, without knowing, sabotaging my feelings. I suffered a loooong time of traumas throughout my childhood and I had a repressed anger bcs my parents and relatives always neglected It. When I was youger I'd be always taught not to be aggressive even in very hard times - then, soon I'd develop a low self-steem because I wasn't able to stand up for myself. They say that people who are phisicaly or verbaly assaulted shouldn't be aggressive and hit back it, but, guess what, you'll be always the humiliated and the helpless in that story.
Yeah, that's it. Energy above everything and the details fall into place.
But saying "let go" is like telling someone with depression to "be happy"
My confusion with it is that by letting go I generally have nothing to say. And within that state I’m just observant. Which is boring. However, there are things that could be memorized that allow a true nature or personality to be expressed. Then you you’re able to be in that state without even thinking
Yeah same problem. This is why i memorize prompts to use pattern recognition in conversations.
Not really.
no literally. “be authentic. let go. be yourself.” we know ts justtt feels impossible and you’re the only person that can figure it out for yourself. might as well be telling a homeless person to get a job
I love how free he is lol
Please keeping doing these Julien. Based and helpful as hell thanks man
As I listened, I formed a little mental reminder for myself: the problem with relying on technique, is that you're relying on technique.
That is, you never actually express the real you, and you never really grow in skill. You lean heavier on the crutch and thus, depend more on the crutch.
I started working out lately and I’ve found new confidence and love for myself. I think this is my next challenge. I need to breakout of my mental/social prison I’ve put myself in. I’m gonna try and talk to 5 people a day. Whether if it’s at work or at the store.
This guy just saved my social skills, i reallt thought that it was just about apllying some random shit of dale canegie ( for example) to become good socially but this really changes my whole view on the matter, thank you truly.
guys if you dont know how a social natural feels, its being like being drunk without drinking alcohol, if you dont know the feeling of being drunk, its time to find out.
this video shined light on so many things i never even acknowledged wow this is great
This video touches on everything you need to know about social skills. Great Video!
Thank you!
This was actually amazing ! Learned alot
Even though I am experienced enough approaching and conversations, these videos by far, are much much better than the 99% garbage from the other channels. This is well thought out.
Thanks! Glad this was so helpful!
I feel like once you master the vibe the content will come more naturally and effortlessly. Love your videos they are becoming a game changer since I started watching them.
Powerful video. Letting go is so powerful. Thank you.
You can either
experience the pain of
discipline or the pain of
regret. The choice is
yours.-Unknown🎯✅
Interesting quote, but what was your main takeaway from THIS video? 😉
Both are pain? How’s one better
@@Wtfisahandle344 Discipline makes you strong in the ways of feeling it through.
Feeling the pain of regret keeps the pain going in a loop until you heal
man, from now on you're the only self-help youtuber i believe. all these youtubers here and there just throw vague advices without any consideration on how it'll effect the watcher. thanks for the realness, we really need that in our fake world.
Thanks for this gem💎🔥, really helped me understand a lot about myself❤
Glad it was so helpful!
Masterpiece, I will try to apply these ideas in real life for sure. Congratulations on your work Julien, it is really significant because it improves people's lives I wish you much success and happiness.
So much value for free. Wow! Thank you
Just like most people these days say: I rarely leave a comment, but this time it made me to do so, lol.
I’m glad that I watched this video. “Glad” is understated in expressing of my joy right now.
I want to keep listening until I master “expressing my authentic self”. When I was a kid, I used to read rap lyrics and my sisters used to admire saying that I am so cool, even though I was the least good looking and smart among them (that’s how I used to think of myself). But that time I used to enjoy doing things that would make me feel happy. When I stopped doing things what I love, I became distant from my authentic self and I acquired more and more new qualities that were not even me. I became just “others” like my family used to compare and say I’m not like “others” and I have wonderful qualities, but I lost my authentic self. You might ask me how I know. I know by how I’m interested more in other people rather than my own interests. (Just my thoughts here). Long conversation short, I love the simple “LET GO” you mentioned and hopefully I can go back to my authentic self when I was 11 years old last time. Thank you!🙏🏽
Thank you for explaining this thoroughly!
You’re very welcome!
How is that people don’t understand this, I am sick of all the bs other youtubers give you, they clearly don’t know what they talking about, thank you
Thank you for putting it out on youtube for free before. ❤️
I think youve really hit on something fundamental with your transformation philosophy. I think humans have disconnected from their identity over generations of people not investigating themselves and stumbling onto something that works without understanding the why. People just consume content thinking that will change how they behave somehow. If they know how intellectually then they know how to operationally which I think is the fallacy. The doing can only be learned by doing it! The mind vs the heart. The mind learns how through language, the heart learns through action.
🔥👊
Thinking is the language of the brain and feeling is the language of the body
courage>experience>knowledge>time>competence>confidence and the cycle repeats
Wut?
My take away is that reference experiences is the factor. In shift you said field experience is king. Most of us just don't practice the reference experience and then break down the reference to see where our possible sticking points are. We are lazy, entitled, and that's why we don't have the success that you do. But I have had success thanks to you, rsd, Barnes and noble, and CZcams, and kombaucha 😉
hey what does reference experiences and field experiences mean?
@@amaanahmed7376 going out in the real world and having real field experience rather than reading books theory or talking to someone online
Gotta get that Kombucha in.
@@ayushsenseisama shit's wild how effective it is. Lol nobody thinks about this shit. Just go out try it and see what works.
He said that emotional skills and vibe is 80% of success and that comes from inner work and removing internal blocks - not getting in a tonne of reference experiences and analyzing them logically
In a few minutes I've learned more about social skills from you than I have in the last year. God bless!
Great content, thanks. It's obvious how much self-work Julian has done. Shy people can transform their social powers in amazing ways. I vouch from experience. Best wishes to everyone here.
Juicy essence reminder, thanks a lot
Julien. Hello. I absolutely adore your blunt-Ness. I went to a birthday party today and realized...my social skills suck. I've not watched anything else on social skills. No need. I really like your style. Thank you. Can't wait to see what happens.😊
Great content. This guy is most funny when he doesn’t try to be. It’s great.
Thank you for making this video
I call it the julien rule! 😃 ...."The let it go rule"...A monumental social skill
Hey, INCREDIBLE STUFF!! Is there a part 2 to this video??
Thank you so much for this, subscribed!
Thank you! Welcome to the channel!
Just being honest when I first saw some of your clips, I thought you were another obnoxious self help guru. Yesterday I decided to watch an actual video and I’m hooked. I’ve watched about 9 videos fully since yesterday. Growing up I was socially anxious and extremely self conscious. I couldn’t even walk in to a crowded McDonald’s. Once I got my first job in Sales; it was exposure therapy since then. I sucked terribly at first but slowly I got better. I realized I didn’t get better at sales I was just letting more of myself shine through. People buy you not the product. I know this branched off weirdly but I landed a huge client today and I’m on cloud 9. I just want to say I like what you’re doing and keep it up brother. Stay safe and dilate that anus
Love this guy. Talks straight facts.
I'd say the vibe can go above 80% in many cases. There was one time I was talking to my friend about EMPTY BOTTLES in my room, how many were there, how to take them out of the room the most effective way etc. The topic was boring af and yet the vibe made it really interesting.
Somewhere between a waitress, bartender, care rental agent , or ANYONE who deals with the public, which I minimally did, learned how people are and feel, which also makes you learn about yourself
You are teaching reality to people who need the tips and tricks...
Truth is hard to swallow for me in this one
"I talked to more people than probably all of you combined" sounds modest to me !!
Simply stating facts… 😉
@@JulienHimself I apologize man, I did a judgement on your person and after watching the entirel video I learned some things I didn't know, my mistake 🙏👍
Love you buddy❤️
🙏🙏🙏
I realized that i have fake voice,hiding my real voice,I decided to let my voice come out and now I feel like a magician at talking,and my nerves have deminished 80%.I approve this message
¡Esto es lo que no había visto hasta ahora! ¡Por fin lo entiendo! Mi mayor error siempre ha sido tratar de compensar mis iseguridades y mi ansiedad tratando de razonar cómo debo actuar en vez de DEJARLO IR _(letting go)._ Siempre he sido consciente de ello, en realidad, pero ahora estoy convencido de que lo que más va a aumentar mis habilidades sociales y me va permitir vivir en el presente es aprender a expresar mis emociones sin miedo, sin juzgarme.
Lo que me queda por descubrir es qué ejercicios me pueden entrenar progresivamente para lograr dejarlo salir de forma natural. Creo que participar en un coro me ayuda bastante, porque estoy entrenando mi respiración y sacando la voz desde adentro. ¿Qué más? Algo que debería practicar sin dudas es la meditación. La meditación, además de aumentar la capacidad de mantener la atención también se dice que permite escuchar o sentir tu mundo interior. No es lo mismo analizarte que permitirte sentir lo que te sucede sin bloquear nada.
Jesus love you always Jesus always behind you will give you courage and strengths ..
Best social skills guy on CZcams
Thank you. Very informative and accurate.
This is amazing. Thank you sir
The most interested person in the room is the most interesting
This makes a lot of sense!
This is great! 😊
Great vid❤
I literally do not know what to forreal talk about when im talking too people.
My social skills are trash.
I just have nothing to talk about.
I got out alot.
I go to shows and bars and just never have anything to say or keep a conversation going. It sucks.
Maybe try saying all of this that you just said, I would be interested and impressed with your depth of authenticity!
Wow - what an inspirational speech!
Thanks for the video
I would like to share my experience,i think that will help people->Many things that I thought were the truth,were actually creations of my mind,I got caught in my thoughts,I lived in my thoughts,thinking that thinking more is gonna help me.But what I thought was the truth,was just "my thoughts".So
1)Your thoughts(and your emotions) are not the real world.The real world is "What happens".If something hasnt happened,its not the truth.It becomes the truth when it happens.For example,If you think you are akward or socially disabled or weird,thats just YOUR THOUGHT.If other people dont consider you weird,or are weirded out by your behavior,then you are not weird untill its proven,until it happens repetitively,until it becomes a pattern.Everyone acted weird in their life,once twice thrice.Everyone.But actions dont determine who you are.What you decide to continue doing,is who you are.
2)Yes the human mind is very well adjusted to connect socially with other people.But it needs training,especially if you were never taught to do so when you were a kid.When you train how you speak,and my favorite one using your facial expressions and body language(and the SMILE is the most powerfull social tool),you will naturally become more expressive,your speech and your body language will have a natural flow
3)Dont suppress emotions.When you are alone,let all the emotions and the thoughts that come with it ,hit you.Dont try to avoid it by playing games,or doomscrolling on social media,let the emotions hit you.And then analyze what you are thinking.If you dont,those emotions will start to control you,and will sabotage every attempt of socializing
I just never noticed or knew what social skills was. LOL im glad I know now really am going to become the best me.
need a book for this.
Julien how did you come up with the 10 laws from 10 game? Was it you or a team? Was it from all your reference experiences? Do you still apply the 10 laws of game to your life? Thanks for all what you do. I bought all your products.
What that I teach comes from REAL LIFE EXPERIENCE, having worked on myself since 2006 and coached all around the world since 2010... If you want my most up-to-date social skills system which I currently use, I'd suggest checking out High Vibe Communication: bit.ly/3aR0cQu
Just a month listening to julian I have seen so much improvement. I was talking to this girl she said what I say is not really funny but how I say it makes her laugh.
Could you make a video of how you came up with the 10 laws from your program 10 game? I just always wanted to know
Very inspiring, I would love to see where he started
With the "Hey, my name is Jeremiah" part I feel personally attacked 🤣🤣🤣...lol good shit 👌
Here we go!
My 1 tip is to manage a way to be an observer, rather than to be observed. My nr 1 trigger for anxiety is i feel observed all the time and sort of am in a mindset of being observed by others. I have learned now to be able to feel like an observer instead, and when people look at me or talk to me, i can now actually feel calm, because i am studying them, rather than feeling like they are constantly studying me, and reading my mind, realising i am terrified😂 a good way to do this (for me) is to raise my cheeks a bit as if i am smiling with my eyes, and then instead of looking directly at the person, look slightly in front of the person. This relaxes my whole face, and my eyes don't get bigger as if i am scared, and i am able to relaxe. Not eating processed foods and candy helps ALOT aswell.. carbs in foods like rice is ok, but processed sugars makes my body unable to handle even the mpst basic of social interactions😂 not eatimg sugar for a few days makes me able to handle all sorts of mental and physical struggles much better
Great Video, 100% real talk right here!
Thanks! Glad this resonates!
and how do i learn how to let it go ? What's the best day to day workflow to follow to train ? Can you give exercices/things to do etc ?
I have learnt that, u r saying to be a child again❤ thanks man real advice
Really enjoyed this video! Think letting go is the problem for most of us. Any chance we can get more tips on how to let go? Thanks!
1. Let your desires go, 2. Reinforce the mood (and keep your talking to things that you are passionate about), and 3. Profit?
80% vibes 20% authenticity
What if my authentic self is to not wanting to talk to certain people because it doesn't interest me but I have to because of work/events etc. I mean, I am authentic by not wanting to engage with them however I have to.
I like your shirts and haircut !!! 👍
Bro, I’m extremely analytical.
Growing up I had problems understanding jokes because i was extremely literal and analytical. I’m A LOT better now. How do we fix it permanently?
this man saved me
I notice that i can quite easily read others, i understand what they want the interaction about, but I simply cannot come up with an answer to their desires fast enough, i lose their respect after few failed attempts and that annoys me, if I could just pause time and give myself a few extra 5-10seconds each time to think faster, i think my social life would be just fine. Also one other thing is I enjoy learning about others usually, but i don't really like them knowing about my life. I prefer to stay on surface level and keep them guessing who I could be rather then letting them actually know who I am because most of the time, the image I give out is better then what I am at home.
Keep up!buddy..
"Letting go like taking a 💩!!!" I like this guy's metaphor😅😅😅😅😅
That was fucking awesome.