Social Skills Everyone Should Know
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- čas přidán 18. 06. 2024
- Which social skills do you have? Most people don't realize charisma comes in many different flavors. There are 14 distinct social skills you can have -- knowing what your social strengths are is key to having great AUTHENTIC social interactions.
Do you feel awkward? You might be using your non-natural social skills. In this video, learn which skills you have and how to improve others.
In this video:
0:00 Intro
0:59 Linchpin
1:54 Conversationalist
3:22 The comedian
4:18 Speaker
4:58 Influencer
5:41 Listener
6:46 Magnet
7:36 Storyteller
8:41 Nurturer
9:30 Decoder
10:35 Leader
11:36 Connector
12:26 Dreambuilder
13:06 Chameleon
13:49 Final thoughts
******
Hi, I’m Vanessa!
You deserve more. More influence, more income, more of what you want. I would be honored to help you.
Do you want to be the most likable person in the room? Get my FREE guide now: www.scienceofpeople.com/
My name is Vanessa Van Edwards and I’m a recovering awkward person. I’m also a multi-time bestselling author of:
Cues: Master the Secret Language of Charismatic Communication (www.scienceofpeople.com/cues/) Captivate: The Science of Succeeding with People (www.scienceofpeople.com/capti...) and I am the creator of People School. This advanced video communication course is for high achievers who want to be confident communicators.
My goal is simple: Help YOU get to your goals faster. Never be overlooked, interrupted or forgotten again.
PS - Get our free 60-minute online trainings: www.scienceofpeople.com
+ Join the party on Instagram: / vvanedwards
******
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Find out more in our full article on this topic ☞
www.scienceofpeople.com/social-skills/
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Is that normal to be magnet... because I tend to feel bit overwhelmed of it ....
I can say yes for 12 of this but can't say yes for Chameleon /Linchpin
i need your email id to connect with you on linkedin.
i dont mean to be so off topic but does any of you know a tool to get back into an Instagram account..?
I was stupid lost my login password. I appreciate any assistance you can offer me
Sometimes the people you think don't want to talk to you are the ones waiting for you to talk to them
i can tell you - focus and practice ;)
no way
Can confirm
Oh interesting
Sometimes the people you think don't want to fu€k are the main people who actually want to fu€k you
1) Glue - keep people together
2) Conversationalist - articulate
3) Comedian
4) Speaker
5) Influencer
6) Listener
7) Magnet
8) Storyteller
9) Nurturer
10) Decoder
11) Leader
12) Connector
13) Dreambuilder
14) Chameleon
Not sure the point of this video... just to inform? Can these skills be learned or are they just a part of our nature?
I guess part of the reason for this video is to identify which skill/s you resonate with naturally and to find ways to amplify those skills.
This is more so of an overview of the many "roles" of social interactions. What I assume the video is for is to identify the traits you resonate with the most naturally and identify the traits you are not that very good at. With that information you can work and amplify the traits you already have and the ones you dont atleast you can work on. Knowing what you are and cant do can help you understand yourself much more this is helpful when meeting new people and work situations.
It was interesting to me and if you want to learn more and develop one of these more, like listening, she has an online school/ program. :)
She said she has a site so u can go and learn them
@@worldofmine6175 of course. Follow the 💰
As someone with no friends or family and no college education I have a hard time socializing and being confident your videos have most definitely gotten me jobs
Hey, nice username xD
Honeybunni99 haha you too 🤣🐰🐰🐰
You are special and amazing :) want to be friends?
Same no college no friends just been working good jobs
Is anyone else here feeling like you have none of these skills?
Exactly, i feel so bankrupt social skill wise
You can learn it. Vanessa is a great teacher.
Charly Houpert and Olivia Fox Cabane are also good teachers.
But Vanessa alone is enough to become a "social god" :D
Yeah I only related to comedian
Make up a category - how would you describe yourself?
@@justoverbroke8063 this is a solid one! I think I'm only a listener
Nurturer has no boundaries, they re kind of caring too much and sometimes get disappointed because they think everyone must be like them
This is me. Work my ass off to keep friendships, remember bdays, text people and plan events... It is not often reciprocated :(
They are also gullible, indecisive and risk averse.
@@taraf4890
Set boundaries. Remember boundaries are loving not to only to keep people out but to let the right people in.
can u make a vid about how to improve every one of them
"Effortlessly"... That was SO CUTE.
Hehe... i am not a native English speaker and... in my native language i got.. some t.twisters... examples folow: "W Strzebrzeszynie chrząszcz brzmi w trzcinie.". "Szosą suchą". Translations: 1st: a bug buzzes in the bushes (in a village named Strzebrzeszyn). 2nd: "on a dry road"
Yeph for sure
There is another skill. Active Listening. In a small group when a person is presenting I listen carefully and if something is not clear I will interrupt and ask for more details. This let the speaker know you are paying attention and are interested.
Listener was one of the type of the social skills she mentioned. So maybe you’re not that good a listener apparently :P
@@adibhutani9977 I believe active listening is different from just regular listening because it requires you to immediately respond rather than just being quiet -- hence OP mentioning interrupting, but not interrupting disrespectfully. But yeah I can agree active listening is a subset of listening. It's just different enough to be separate though.
Jay G Sounds quite right. Agreed.
Decoder?
I just want to say I absolutely appreciate your existence. Thank you for sharing and helping awkwards world wide 😇
Effortlessly blew my mind... The world needs more awkward people.
Agree :)) She had me there too! Being authentic is what I'm embracing more of, guess this could be why one relates with. Where you're at, seeing ones strong suit and not
Yourself is truly a captivating awkward human being Vanessa, I admire and appreciate you!
this really made me feel better about myself as i am a nurterer and decoder:) my sister is amazing at socialising and i have always felt inferior but i now realise i have my own strengths, thank you vanessa!
You’re the only person on the internet I trust about charisma tips. Thank you for the content!
Vanessa talks about showing vulnerability and not trying to be perfect is a great trait of personality and I love how she shows it in that video, Love the book and the video
I’ve tried to be more open but often when I show venerability it gets used against me. There I go back into my shell of not trusting people.
Here's a secret. People who feel they don't have good social skills can be something the world cannot get enough of, a great listener.
Quite honestly, people are dying to be heard, and in this fast paced world, there are not enough good listeners. To talk to someone, have them really hear you, is gold. Fake talk is everywhere, good listening is not.
this insight of the different kind of social skills, i wasnt even aware was a thing. I knew them seperately but never occured to me that they are under a umbrella. This was great! thank you!
I can never picture you as anything close to socially awkward.
I like how you explained and thought of all these aspects. It's getting my mind going on how to improve. Things I could focus on more directy.
Just as i feared. I have no social skills whatsoever....
I don't fear public speaking, but don't seek it out. Some people think I'm funny, but i don't want to entertain.
Spontaneous unscripted conversations are dreadful (better since studying Captivate) but i have a phobia of telephone conversations, especially making them.
I'm great at writing. Fibres me a chance to organize my thoughts and vocabulary.
Thanks ma'am.. based on the 14 social skills which you've elaborated, I've identified my top 3 social skills which I'm good at:
1) COMEDIAN
2) LISTENER
3) DREAM BUILDER
You're deffff a magnet😊 and thanks for the vid! I'm always interested in breakdowns, categories and lists so thanks! I feel like we'd get a long well. But I'm also not a great listener lol but I practice and can do it
Overall I'm a Chameleon but my strongest skills are magnet, conversationalist, dream builder. The ones I'd like to improve are speaker, story teller, linchpin or leader.
It's also mind blowing that I'm a veryyyy natural conversationalist and social butterfly. I fit in with anyone and I'm good at fixing their problems and having good conversations, but I thought that's how everyone was so it's crazy to me reading the comments here like "I have no skills" I'm just baffled. That's so different for me to grasp.
seriously i opened this video with very less expectation . but this is just the one basic video requires to improve myself which was missing .Thanks.
Man, I’m terrible in all areas. But not a surprise! I appreciate the breakdown. It’s good to know there are different skillsets within the larger skillset.
Hahaha I had the worst time trying to say ‘subsequently’ during a presentation!! It was exactly the same as you here!
It if funny. I don’t fall under any of these 14 social skills. I have one trait here or there but none of these 14 skills correctly describe me.
I like how you made that comeback at the end with that very excellent pronunciation. Thank you very much for the content and have a great day
I thought I didn’t have any of these social skills but I’m actually a conversationalist! Good to know!
Bravo for your great work Vanessa. You are incredible and I love you more than you know!
I love u because you help non sociable people....People are most concern with being judged and have a tough time overcoming it
Wow, I rarely find videos where more than 50% of it is cool new stuff I've never heard of before. Thank you thank you Vanessa for sharing this! I decided this week that I'm going to stop making excuses for my crippling social anxiety and develop some skills to help me better put myself out there and live life more fully.
Oh I love to hear this!! You're so welcome. You got this ❤️
Like her fluently
Like her enthusiasm
Like her magnetising ability
Like her strong personality
She does look like actress galgadot.
May be she can be the next wonder women..😅😅😊😊
Very informative..(science of people) ...ThanksVVE
Very good video Vanessa. Enlightening in regards these various components. Ill be looking into your class and the areas I need to improve on with you. :)
I've always been around toxic people and I know I'm glue because I see good in everyone and I end up hating it.
We need them more than ever in crowded areas, life savers indeed. .
That was really insightful, I hadn't thought that deeply before about what I meant by wanting to improve my social skills. This breaks it down really well and makes it clear what I need/want to improve upon. The fact that you have a plethora of resources for me to now look into is very impressive. Thank you Vanessa
Oh wow! That's so wonderful to know! You're most welcome! 💖🙏🏻
My husband and I are both magnets. I did not know this is a social skill! Also I’m conversationalist but I tend to like story tellers because that’s not my best quality. We are also both great nurturers. We are a perfect match. I am also a decoder! Very cool. This is a great video!
So you r the hypernormies couple 😂
Sad I officially have zero social skills!
@Uvoicer Text To Speech this is supposed to be a joke, sorry you didn't get it lol
OMG this, is by far, has been my favorite video on your page. I've been struggling to talk about myself and write a cover letter. With this video I have gain a better way to describe myself. That will actually appeal to employers. 🔥💜
Side note, leaving the blooper of you stumbling over "effortlessly" in the main part of the video. Content/relatable gold. Really great way to connect with your audience
Thank you!
sooo cool!!! Vanessa, you so positive and sweet! :) I love you and your video. Thank you very much for such an amazing effort!
I’m devouring all Vanessa content, super powerful and super useful information, it’s helping me out and also my students. I’m determined to learn every single pice of Vanessa’s work. ❤❤❤❤
I am SO thrilled to hear that. ❤ Thank you for being here!
Thank you so much vanessa!!! ❤❤❤
Vanessa's content is always excellenttt - also how awesome is her energy ?
I recently found you and I admire you so much, I wish to have your confidence and social skills
You can work on it
Amazing social skills, thanks Vanessa. Blessings from Puebla, Mexico.
Excellent. Thank you for making this video ❤️.
after you got stuck on "effortlessly" - I couldn't say it either 😂😂😂 !!!
LOVE her!! 💘 Funny but very educational and super helpful tips. 👍 And she does it......effortlessly! Giggle!😆🤣😉
Lol I really got connected to your energy as soon as you started talking. I even subscribed.
The way you compliment and explain makes me think you really care xo
♥️♥️
Thank You So Much for this Great Video! It was so helpful.
My top three are decoder, connector and dream builder. Perfectly suits my career.
Thank you for this video! im thinking of improving my social skills for better life
Thank you! This is incredibly informational. One more thing...can you please shar the make and model of your microphone. Your sound is excellent.
Great video!!! Love this❤ I learn so much about the people in my life or have crossed path with. And see these different personalities within them. So cool. Thanks
I'm so glad you loved it! ❤
I like the Positive high energy, combined with a smile that you always maintain in all your videos and presentations. As well as the great content that you always share with us (audience).
The high neurotic in me is starting to sweat... I made it to social skill #8 and still haven't found my top 3 skills😬
I honestly like you SO MUCH MORE after seeing you keep the funny B-reel out takes in this video, thank you
I am becoming a decoder :O omg am I a wizard girl this video has done opened my eyes I thought I wa skillless talentless 😢 THANK YOU
I love following and learning just about everything you put out.
I am a = (Magnet + influencer + decoder + chameleon) with my most dominant trait as decoder.
I believe the type of work I do has forced me to become those mixed styles.
I wish I was a comedian and less of a nurturing listener outside of business.
Do you have any tips how to flip the switch and adjust one's personality traits from the business world into a more social/family/fun environment and less critical?
I struggle with my work personality flowing into my family/ friends environment.
Look forward to your next video.
This video was so interesting!! Thank you!
Vanessa: I just discovered your YT site ! You cover topics that I had been looking for !
at 2:18 it seemed that you were using the "pratfall effect" ! Although unintentional, it did make me like you even more !
Was wondering why I had one or two of ever skill and didn’t have a three on many of them until you got to chameleon. So excited to start practicing these skills!
I love it! Let me know how it goes! 😄
This was a really interesting video! Does anyone have any insight/tips based on these rankings? Always looking for more ways to improve :) I got:
1. Magnet
2. Speaker
3. Leader
4. Dreambuilder
5. Influencer
6. Chameleon
7. Connector
8. Linchpin
9. Listener
10. Conversationalist
11. Decoder
12. Comedian
13. Storyteller
14. Nurturer
Thank you for share your knowledge
You do this so EFFORTLESSLY :)
Loved the video!❤️ If I am a conversationalist only, what carreers should I pursue?
lol I have none I’m the quiet one with stress and anxiety. Thanks to social anxiety
I’ve learned lots of those skills growing up as kid of preacher and evangelist. I’m not good at all of them, but I’m doing good at some of them or at least have tried for need.
Very well done, thanks.
Wow! I've always wondered why I could tell someone's motive by observing their movements, way of speaking, facial expressions etc. Even with the least interaction when speaking with people I can usually sense how the atmosphere is going by their slightest of movement. I'm also able to bring those around me together and help others when in need. I have a large frame so people are sometimes afraid to approach at 1st but when they see my face (babyface) or speak with me, the ice is usually broken. I get along with most people and I have a very positive nature and aim to perfect myself and those around me; in the realm of realism. I suppose that makes me a Chameleon right?
You sound very perceptive.
Thank you 🙏🏻 it is really useful
I have trouble speaking but I'm good at listening! 🤣Also a nurturer, I have trouble saying no to people though and have trouble with boundaries 😅I think I'm a dreambuilder too, I like to see the best in people and what they can accomplish
Vanessa, you are my giude in this world I really appreciate what you do 🤗
Hello Vanessa,I have discovered you recently and was quite interested to get your book after only two of your videos,lol.I ususally am not easy to be influenced,so that must be a compliment to your charismatic persona.I am very interested in social experiments and a science lover.I heard you saying you would love to meet more Magnet personalities?After watching this video twice,I noted my cues: 1-Linchpin;2-Conversationalist;3-Comedian;4-Influencer;5-Listener;6-Magnet;7-Storyteller;8-Nurture;9-Decoder;10-Leader;11-Dreambuilder;12-Chameleon.I would love to hear from you.Keep up your great work,you do rock :D
Thank you so much for the support, this is awesome!! Thank you for sharing your cues =) Glad you like the content 👍
Very informative as usual. I had to rewatch because the difference between linchpins and connectors wasn't clear to me. Was anyone else stumbled by that differentiation?
Me: Linchpin, conversationalist, listener, decoder, leader, dream-builder. Usually, I talk more when it's a face-to-face conversation with 2-3 people and I listen more when it's a bigger group or public talk. Now I see that I wasn't necessarily bad at social skills because I talked less in the crowds but it was more diverse.
Lovely teaching thanks 😊
Really WELL DONE video! You are effortless! I got tripped up by the title & almost passed u by! I don't "should" on me!!! Have a blessed day! Thank Q~
Thanks so much!! I'm glad you enjoyed it!
A great video again.👍💯 Stay blessed and protected!🤲✌💯 Aamin Summa Aamin!
First one to watch here . You are amazingly funny and smart ❤️. I'm definitely a magnite
🅘︎ 🅛︎🅞︎🅥︎🅔︎ 🅤︎
hmm. top 3: magnet, conversationalist, listener/nurturer
bottom 3: speaker, storyteller, influencer. moral is i'm a self-loathing extrovert who loves people but thoroughly sucks at selling myself lol. thanks for this vid! super interesting
Eres increíble, además muy linda... Felicidades! Gracias por todo lo qué nos compartes 🌸
Hi Vanessa
That's Chill - Kudos ✌️
Vanessa is my new Sis!!! The embodiment of poise and presence illuminated by an amazing transparency. I'm so glad this was MY FIRST episode. What's apparent is how 'effortlessly' you set such a high bar on audience engagement. Unapologetically adopting you (and the way you do you) as an authentic model of excellence. Dayum Sis! ijs
Glad to have you here! Thank you!!
Wow!! Look at her smile!
Advantageous video 👌👌😇 Informative
"Screw it, I'm just going to say easily."
- Vanessa Van Edwards conscious
😆😆
I really appreciate your video all the time it really help me by self development even i am at work i always listen to your video GOD BLESS
Thank you for leaving the bloopers
Thanks for this video. It was amazing! I really struggle with the word "authentic". Like what does that even really mean? I see it all the time and people refer to it often, but the concept of "be authentic" is confusing to me, especially on how to be authentic>
Chameleon 💯💪❤️ Such a great video, thanks 💯💯💯💯
Very helpful. Thank you.
You're welcome - so glad I could help!
There's no such thing as awkward silence. Silence is golden. On the other hand I've had numerous awkward conversations...
"Awkward" = important if unpleasant truth being revealed, somehow.
Hey vanesaa you re doing such a great job Thumbs up from INDIA🤝
Social skills are very important in india if i understood correctly. India has strict etiquette.
I used to do Story Telling until I felt I screwed up my moms obituary, I thought I was a narcissist until I realized I *was* Nervous & Sad at the time. I miss her yet I’m the parson I am today because of my parent imperfect upbringing & My Choice in Life. I used to be a *Great Listener* Today I feel as if I’ve become a complainer. So I hardly talk to those I LOVE at all these days
:( Thank you.
😅 You had me at Effort...liley , great example of being real 😊 👋 love the content
Thanks for watching! =)
wow thanks great delivery style
Great video as always💛