Why Are African American Woman Infatuated with Nigerian Men That Don’t Select Them As Wives!? 🔥

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  • čas přidán 4. 07. 2024
  • We addressed all the questions most women dating in any metropolitan city that comes across African men… specifically Nigerian Men! Why are African American women so infatuated with Nigerian men, yet they’re often NOT being selected as life partners/ WIVES!!!
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    Special thanks to the @nosh_entertainment for joining us to have these discussions.
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Komentáře • 1,5K

  • @denatora7142
    @denatora7142 Před 10 měsíci +449

    I am a Nigerian and I disagree that African American don't have a culture. You have. You have made something beautiful out of a chaotic situation and hands you were dealt with to create something unique for you. Of course there is bad and good in every culture but that is what makes it. Out of chaos you developed your style of dressing, slangs, music (hello) ' food and lots more. So yeah, I disagree that you don't have a culture. You do!. Am glad y'all made something beautiful out of a terrible situation good or bad, you created it and am proud of y'all.

    • @letstalkovercocktails
      @letstalkovercocktails  Před 10 měsíci +37

      I appreciate your comment. We have a entertainment culture that has been created just not something everyone can relate to. That’s the struggle for me. I am thankful to be an American woman…

    • @denatora7142
      @denatora7142 Před 10 měsíci +13

      ​@@letstalkovercocktails 😊. Thanks for the reply.
      Just to add 'Akata' while literally means wild cat/panther. Contexually, it means 'acting brand new' like 'pretending to forget where you from b/c you been in the wild'. Nigerians in diaspora are sometimes called that. So a nigerian pretending not to speak his own language infront of others just to act cool, or pretending not to eat african foods or wear african attires etc may sometimes be called akata. So they will say 'she's acting like an akata'. Mostly it used when a form of pretence is sensed. Basically pretending to not know where you from to act cool but I think b/c most nigerians think black Americans are Africans & think we experience the same struggles, they then associate certain behavior as pretends not knowing history behind it. So if they see a black American use spoon to eat fufu for example, they say that person is an akata but its out of ignorance thinking every black persons know you use hands for that type of food. My thoughts all over the place but I hope my explanation helps. Bottomline is for akata to be used, the person must percieve a sense of pretence perhaps due to ignorance. Also anybody can be called that and its mostly not in a bad way but I won't say some don't use it in a bad way either. Its a word that can go either/or.

    • @mikolowiskamikolowiska4993
      @mikolowiskamikolowiska4993 Před 10 měsíci +6

      @@letstalkovercocktails everyone relates to hip-hop culture, just as you can't relate to a man marrying multiple wives

    • @gerardonochie3408
      @gerardonochie3408 Před 10 měsíci +9

      @@mikolowiskamikolowiska4993 That is not true. Everyone does not relate to hip-hip. Entertainment culture is a shallow thing. The Japanese don't go about saying everyone loves manga and use it as the epitome of Japanese culture. African-Americans have no culture in the actual sense of what culture means. It is not totally their fault based on slavery and many other factors.

    • @blackseed9293
      @blackseed9293 Před 10 měsíci +27

      ​@@gerardonochie3408This would be false. Our culture was easily seen and experienced until about 1980. Family, Church, marriage, food, music, sense of belonging and a future. What destroyed Black American culture was the importation of Crack Cocaine which obliterated Black families and Black ppl for almost 20 consecutive years. Along with removing good jobs from cities and putting millions of Black males in prisons and making sure they learned no trades for their 20 to 50 year sentences. Some of my friends got 360 years in prison. This is the part left out of these conversations.

  • @Blowkala
    @Blowkala Před 9 měsíci +94

    I’m a Nigerian man married to African American lady, in my own opinion I think everyone has culture and I think it’s important that we should learn each other culture, one thing I can guarantee you is that we Nigerian learn other peoples cultures and we take ours with wherever we go.

    • @mahaganyogoke
      @mahaganyogoke Před 9 měsíci +2

      Good Evening sir. may i ask how long you and your wife have been married?

    • @GentleBreeze-ib9dz
      @GentleBreeze-ib9dz Před 5 měsíci

      Y’all be the main ones on that bs!

  • @sonyabush9513
    @sonyabush9513 Před 10 měsíci +227

    African Americans do have a culture, we created our own style, we set trends, our music, our churches our neighborhoods, our dances, how we respect our elders. Our integrity, we take care of our families.

    • @ms.fortune2957
      @ms.fortune2957 Před 10 měsíci +19

      YESSSSS, VERY WELL SAID! I haven't listen to this yet and can already tell it's offensive. smh WE also contributed to the civil rights movement CHANGING LAWS so that other Cultures have opportunity to reside here in AMERICA! I'll WATCH before explaining what the real deep rooted issue is.

    • @FactsOnlyPlease.
      @FactsOnlyPlease. Před 10 měsíci +16

      For a very long time we (African Americans) carried the heavy load of keeping people of African descent relevant in the eyes of the world. I don’t say that as a negative. I am enjoying the renaissance that appears to be occurring on the continent-AND THANK GOD!

    • @H2O1167
      @H2O1167 Před 10 měsíci +5

      No, my friend. It means you dont know what culture is. African, Chinese, Indians, European all have culture. When we say African-American dont have culture, its not an insult, it is the fact and its not their fault. They have passed through alot. Church is not your culture. Start by naming your children African names and learning African dishes and go from there.

    • @gedenironald8635
      @gedenironald8635 Před 10 měsíci

      When other people talk about culture they normally don't refer to most of the things you said, African Americans don't have a culture the same way White Americans don't have a culture. British or English people will tell you the same about White Americans, what's worse, is that White Americans who didn't have a culture created a cultureless Black American community that became worse than the white man who didn't have a culture. The culture in Black America is created by white masters, they determine for you when your culture must change, how to present your music and select who must present that culture. Africans, Arabs, Asians have a clearly defined culture, when we get married, when we burry our dead, when a child is born, traditional dances, traditional songs etc, etc... and those are things Black and White Americans don't have and that is the culture we are talking about.

    • @ronj7658
      @ronj7658 Před 10 měsíci

      African American culture is a sub devision of white American culture.

  • @BlkDll
    @BlkDll Před 10 měsíci +213

    As an African-American I find it to be very distasteful and ignorant for the host to say we don’t have culture. The world copies US in culture, behavior, swag, food, dance and music 🎼 etc,.
    She needs to take history lessons of African American 🇺🇸 ADOS/FBA we a resilient, intelligent, talented and the best that was brought from Africa to America 🇺🇸
    We are worldwide Blessings to ADOS.

    • @VL60757
      @VL60757 Před 10 měsíci +8

      I agree!!!

    • @Cahluvca
      @Cahluvca Před 10 měsíci +5

      💯

    • @coreywhite4603
      @coreywhite4603 Před 10 měsíci

      She also doesn’t understand that he sees black American women as whores as something to be played with.. much like any other none black group of men. You see how shocked she was when he said the sex is good but explained why they chose thr women and she was like really.. over good sex. SMH she literally has all the respect in tha world for them and they literally have zero respect for us. She is deserving to be played with by them maybe it will serve to wake her up to how they see her. He’s telling her very nicely that you are trash compared to our women. Oh yeah you know thy love that white woman as well. The nicer she talks to him the nicer he explains to her that she is the bottom of the barrel & she never picks up on it.

    • @mohakweh
      @mohakweh Před 10 měsíci +6

      You sure about that??

    • @letstalkovercocktails
      @letstalkovercocktails  Před 10 měsíci +17

      What is an African American tradition that’s been carried on for generations? Please don’t use entertainment as an example. What is our flag? What is our language? Slang? Please educate me…

  • @MickiRonnae1
    @MickiRonnae1 Před 10 měsíci +130

    You may not like or respect our culture but we do have one and it’s well documented. Please stop dismissing our accomplishments and history as a group. It is very disrespectful to our ancestors.

    • @blackseed9293
      @blackseed9293 Před 10 měsíci +2

      I don't believe anyone is attacking our past culture. Mao Tse Tong said we were the most amazing and resilient people he had ever met. If he came today, would he or even you think the same thing? Not 60 years ago Black culture when we had the highest marriage rate and church was full, today's Black American culture?

    • @MickiRonnae1
      @MickiRonnae1 Před 10 měsíci +21

      @@blackseed9293 All that is fine and worth looking into. I just don’t like this propaganda going around saying we don’t have a culture. That’s a crazy statement to make when our culture literally influences the world and we are only 13% of the population in the USA. I’m in the Cali and there are barely any black people here but all I see is our culture. The way we dress, dance, our music and how we talk. Notice how we demanded reparations now other black countries are starting to demand reparations. We really have more power than we realize and my last point:
      How can we improve our culture if won’t even recognize it exists? 🫠

    • @blackseed9293
      @blackseed9293 Před 10 měsíci +7

      @@MickiRonnae1 Cultures do rise and fall. This is definitely now a culture that has the worst characteristics. The culture is mostly controlled by Entertainment companies who are run by the people you can't mention. Our past culture was mostly positive but not now. If what you mean by culture is the music, the twerking, sagging, cursing constantly then that's not beneficial and will lead to a self inflicted genocide with the assistance and direction of the people that can't be mentioned and other WS people.

    • @MickiRonnae1
      @MickiRonnae1 Před 10 měsíci +1

      @@blackseed9293 Indeed. I think things may turn around. Since toxic rap culture is no longer profitable the labels are shifting their attention elsewhere. This is the perfect opportunity for us to take back our image and we won’t have to compete with billion dollar companies who have been force feeding us garbage. We can take advantage of the internet and technology to promote the more positive sides of our culture and showcase the people who don’t fit into the mainstream narrative of what it means to be a black American.

    • @WapajeaWalksOnWater
      @WapajeaWalksOnWater Před 10 měsíci

      ​@@MickiRonnae1
      I can't even watch Nigerian movies anymore, because all the Nigerian women, are bleaching their skin, and sounding, and acting like us. I've been to Nigeria, you can't gaslight me, I know how much they admire us. You are exactly correct, everybody in modern society imitates us, and then they want to talk trash about us. Boy Bye

  • @nieshelle1
    @nieshelle1 Před 11 měsíci +69

    I like how this conversation seemed to showcase the flaws of African Americans but not those of Nigerians. The viewpoint of using black people for as sex toys because the are "free" is disturbing. As being your true self is deplorable. So we not going to mention the many of Nigerians married man that cheat constantly and are controlling to their wife 🙄

    • @TravisAtom
      @TravisAtom Před 11 měsíci +2

      I think that was mentioned around the 52:45 mark. Maybe a few seconds after.

    • @letstalkovercocktails
      @letstalkovercocktails  Před 11 měsíci +11

      We were showcasing the question at hand… Why Nigerians don’t marry African American… yet want to date them and vice versa. Americans do a fine job at showcasing how they act to the entire world! Which often days… is a lil desirable.

    • @sundayodabe8150
      @sundayodabe8150 Před 11 měsíci +11

      If you feel that way, maybe it’s better to make a choice of marrying a non Nigerian, before you make a non issue, an issue for Nigerians. Nigerians have their own cultures, and will not be controlled by the useless non cultures of the west. So Marry any man from the west so that you can control him and force him to remain with you, irrespective of how you treat him.

    • @jaybae7315
      @jaybae7315 Před 11 měsíci +18

      In addition to marry for a green card when they have a wife and family back home

    • @simp1eone
      @simp1eone Před 11 měsíci

      Yes everyone has flaws that's why I say you AA women leave our Nigerian or all african men the fck alone and marry your African American men

  • @Stratocaster01
    @Stratocaster01 Před 10 měsíci +107

    African Americans have a culture and us Nigerians and the rest of the world have been influenced by African Americans.

    • @ms.fortune2957
      @ms.fortune2957 Před 10 měsíci +8

      VERY WELL SAID!!!

    • @bibibello2181
      @bibibello2181 Před 10 měsíci +11

      Then you need to be schooled on the definition of culture. I am Nigerian and this erroneous statement is laughable

    • @voguehaven5154
      @voguehaven5154 Před 10 měsíci

      which nigerians are you talking about?? Nigerians are not influenced by black americans...akata. We strive to achieve, while black americans strive to be criminals and then blame the police after they are caught doing crimes.

    • @kelleo9213
      @kelleo9213 Před 10 měsíci +14

      @@bibibello2181 the customs, art, social institutions make up cultures. What are you talking about? Don't be ignorant Jazz, Rap, Soul Food Historical Black Colleges, thousands of inventions. Please read more ....

    • @Stratocaster01
      @Stratocaster01 Před 10 měsíci +6

      @@bibibello2181 you should first school yourself and wean off the ignorance. Culture emanates from a source and becomes that from persistent practice. Culture is established human expression and it is rather rude to suggest that a group of people easily identifiable have no established human expression. For your information, culture can be carried over from another culture as you have African Americans carrying on the the process of “jumping the broom” as a ceremonial rite in weddings. African American music expressions have influenced music all over the world with salient examples all over Africa, S Korea, Japan and the U.K. If you have ever heard of “the Talk”, it is part of African American culture to educate their young ones on police brutality and racism.

  • @SuperKwame1
    @SuperKwame1 Před 10 měsíci +50

    I am from Ghana, and my wife is African American , we have been married for 30years, my first wife was African American, lasted 5years. People are People, if you marry an educated black or white it will work if the woman and the man are cultured, the relationship will work.
    Also, African parents depend on their kids, and so when the women wants to spend every money they make, and the man want to send money home, the marriage will not work.

    • @user-li7gv2hv7k
      @user-li7gv2hv7k Před 8 měsíci +1

      Had no idea. So how do you make a way for yourself and husband and child if the money is sent away to parents. How does it work?

    • @jacintaeke4251
      @jacintaeke4251 Před 8 měsíci +4

      @@user-li7gv2hv7kit’s one of the culture I do not like. And everyone at the receiving end has entitlement mentality. It’s had to get out under it

    • @oluwatobiadegoke13
      @oluwatobiadegoke13 Před 8 měsíci +2

      @@user-li7gv2hv7k Relax! He won't send everything home. We're just too family oriented. 😁

    • @oluwatobiadegoke13
      @oluwatobiadegoke13 Před 8 měsíci

      @@jacintaeke4251 Wtf! It's not like they're putting a gun in your head to send money back home. You only do it if you want to.

    • @mahoganysoul7195
      @mahoganysoul7195 Před 8 měsíci

      Exactly, people are people ....

  • @ladylovve6059
    @ladylovve6059 Před 10 měsíci +33

    What if African American say all Nigerian are scammer they want like that so don’t say African American are animal that’s a insult to us real talk

    • @urbanq5377
      @urbanq5377 Před 9 měsíci

      i get nigerian scammers in my inbox all the time. i have the proof. People aren't just saying nigerian men are scammers to hate them. They really are. And they cant stand the truth. They will call you names for calling their scamming out. Smh. i got called all kinds of names for calling them out on it.

    • @nyaintunyaintu509
      @nyaintunyaintu509 Před 9 měsíci +5

      They wouldn’t care!

    • @irenegaruba48
      @irenegaruba48 Před 9 měsíci

      Calm down!

    • @kingdeechannel6655
      @kingdeechannel6655 Před 4 měsíci

      Generalization is bad but how ever, there are too many black american women who built a CZcams/Facebook page on stereotyping African men as needy and they should make sure he is rich before they consider dating them. Even with that, the are still concerned of the African guy leaving after getting greencard. My conclusion is, I think American men blend better with African women but the vice versa is more problematic because Black American women greencard are their defense line for their bad character. The good ones work, but most of them are bad. Stay away from them. Even the black american men don't really like them because of their character. Red flag to identify; tattoos, piercing extremely cosmetic, single parent, unmarried after 30....watch out for these. Not all are bad but most

    • @It.is.I-tx6ri
      @It.is.I-tx6ri Před 2 měsíci +1

      And they are

  • @2ABECKLES
    @2ABECKLES Před 10 měsíci +18

    I'm Black American and I love that I am ❗️👌🏾

  • @miacrawfordmc
    @miacrawfordmc Před 10 měsíci +34

    For her to sit there and state that African Americans have no cultural! Complete ignorance.

    • @ashburnconnecttv7860
      @ashburnconnecttv7860 Před 10 měsíci +5

      #Fact! She needs to get a college refund. @letstalkovercocktails

    • @theblessedblackwoman
      @theblessedblackwoman Před 10 měsíci +4

      She was very wrong for that! I know she likes Africans but she didn't have to dis her own people.

    • @victorylapp
      @victorylapp Před 10 měsíci

      BABY CALM DOWN!!! 🇳🇬🇳🇬🇳🇬🇳🇬

    • @bahacho9205
      @bahacho9205 Před 9 měsíci +2

      If African Americans have a culture, what is your family system? What are your names? What is your food? What is your language?

    • @franman576
      @franman576 Před 8 měsíci +3

      That woman host was a terrible representation of black americans. Pandering to nigerians as though Nigerians have it together whereas that country is a mess and talking down to AAs as if AAs haven't created ridiculously great culture of music, inventions etc. You name it and AAs have outclassed any other black groups in the world. I feel second hand embarassment for AAs.

  • @makkedahwells93
    @makkedahwells93 Před 10 měsíci +38

    Lies lies lies!!! My husband is Igbo straight from the motherland and I am African American! We are not the only one. 😑😑😑😑

    • @voguehaven5154
      @voguehaven5154 Před 10 měsíci +4

      just cause you married an igbo man, doesn't make it untrue.

    • @seanpeterson7502
      @seanpeterson7502 Před 10 měsíci +2

      @@voguehaven5154 haha

    • @parishers6351
      @parishers6351 Před 10 měsíci +1

      Lol, right.

    • @zainyo516
      @zainyo516 Před 4 měsíci

      You choose the wrong one or you probably just not good for him but Igbo different

    • @femimathew105
      @femimathew105 Před 3 měsíci

      Igbo and yoruba are opposite in almost everything

  • @kathyw.3146
    @kathyw.3146 Před 10 měsíci +93

    Foundational Black Americans built the United States of America! We've been here since 1619, and some say even before then. We have our own culture, which we are very proud of. And while it's one of the youngest cultures in the world, it's also one of the most copied and influential cultures in the world. We set the trends! Our medical discoveries and our many inventions are used all over the world every day. Our music, our athletic abilities, and our art and activism are second to none. And we don't run from country to country looking for refuge. We stay and FIGHT! And we will continue to fight any and every injustice that's thrown against us! While I would never disparage anyone's else's culture, I LOVE AND I'M GREATFUL TO GOD FOR MINE.❤

    • @TruthSerum101
      @TruthSerum101 Před 10 měsíci

      Many of them are so engaged in tribalism that they can't even name 10 other African countries. At only 13% of the U.S. population and having endured centuries of enslavement, we have managed to surpass the entire diaspora. We set the template for the advancement for civil rights and dozens of other undeniable lanes that are uniquely Black American. It's such a silly topic.

    • @mariposamarshall9773
      @mariposamarshall9773 Před 10 měsíci

      So so we'll said- yes WE are imitated and copied all over the world& yes we stay and fight and will continue to do so and BTW WE don' t have to leave home to find employment!!!¡

    • @voguehaven5154
      @voguehaven5154 Před 10 měsíci

      lol...medical advances? you know damn well that is not part of the black american culture. Tattoos, sagging pants, getting angry and trying to fight people, shooting up the place, and not academically ambitious. That is the culture black americans are known for. Also, constantly complaining about white people and how they are holding you back.... Nigerians tend to stay away from all that.

    • @kelleo9213
      @kelleo9213 Před 10 měsíci +8

      Yes!!!

    • @blacksantaria3642
      @blacksantaria3642 Před 10 měsíci +10

      IS THIS WOMAN OUT OF HER MIND TO SAY WE HAVE NO CULTURE. THANKS FOR THE HER KNOW OF OUR RICH CULTURE .

  • @advice4u409
    @advice4u409 Před 6 měsíci +26

    As an AA woman, I don't know any women infatuated with Nigerian or African men. This sounds more personal than collective. I used to get approached by Nigerian men a lot and dated two of them. They were not my cup of tea but very smart and hard-working.

    • @jessikatrotter848
      @jessikatrotter848 Před 6 měsíci +2

      Facts. 🤦🏾‍♀️

    • @joshuaemmanuel949
      @joshuaemmanuel949 Před 4 měsíci +7

      Lol not ur cup of tea but u dated two ok

    • @demolaayorinde3599
      @demolaayorinde3599 Před měsícem

      Haha.

    • @DR-xt9gj
      @DR-xt9gj Před 8 dny

      👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽. Here’s the issue I have with Black American women “dating” Nigerian men or African men from other countries…. #1 - My Black American women “date”, these men while their women for the most part stick with their own Nigerian or African men and don’t even “date” out of their nationality, tribe or ethnicity as much as Black American women do..
      #2- The word date has so many different meanings and connotations …Sometimes dating means sexual intimacy and sometimes it doesn’t….
      Please don’t misunderstand me, I simply don’t want or appreciate Nigerian men and other African men denigrating Black American women and seeing them as easy sexual conquests!!!!!

  • @mariejane1567
    @mariejane1567 Před 10 měsíci +23

    Who said FBA women want to marry these men??? I don't know ANY fba women clamoring over african men.....

    • @sk-wf2dn
      @sk-wf2dn Před 10 měsíci +8

      Me either!!

    • @giftoghas636
      @giftoghas636 Před 10 měsíci

      Then who cares

    • @DirtyEdon
      @DirtyEdon Před 10 měsíci

      The problem is nobody wants to marry black American women...

    • @chiefpharoah
      @chiefpharoah Před 10 měsíci +1

      no one is marrying FBA women, so you have mute point! Don't just dismiss these men, go look at their success record in your community. Who is the prise and who is winning...tell yourself the truth and shame your devil!

    • @durangobasics6195
      @durangobasics6195 Před 10 měsíci +3

      People are marrying each other
      "on the ground", not on the internet.

  • @travisgeorganna
    @travisgeorganna Před 9 měsíci +53

    As an African American woman who often travels back and forth to Nigeria, this is utter nonsense! I urge the host to travel and make her way throughout Nigeria then come back to the table for discussion. Not only we as AA have culture but you will see the root of our culture comes out of the motherland and we are 1 of the same. Let’s educate ourselves around the board, this is why the “certain groups” who want us divided keep us divided with grandiloquent language like this 👀

    • @letstalkovercocktails
      @letstalkovercocktails  Před 9 měsíci +2

      Love to hear you travel abroad. During this conversation we never spoke 💯 absolute. We spoke about our experiences and perceptions of even those near and far )that we were able to validate). I absolutely love history and know exactly where my deepest ancestry began as I have roots that originate in Benin City.
      I’m apart am the solution of understanding and changing the narrative. I want nothing more than our community to win!!! You’re right… we have to work on preventing division.
      This subject was a highly recommended show topic.
      Thanks for watching!

    • @jacklyneverage3881
      @jacklyneverage3881 Před 9 měsíci +6

      You are right. What she said was disgusting!

    • @franman576
      @franman576 Před 8 měsíci +10

      @@jacklyneverage3881 I'm not even AA and i was embarassed by some of the things that came out of that hosts mouth. She needs to travel to Nigeria and she needs to read books on what the AA culture has produced in America. Again I'm not even AA and I'm more proud of her culture than she is.

    • @GentleBreeze-ib9dz
      @GentleBreeze-ib9dz Před 5 měsíci

      What comes out of Africa that’s part of our culture?

    • @richpalmer8325
      @richpalmer8325 Před 4 měsíci

      Pangea is where my root started on planet earth.

  • @sherwood9917
    @sherwood9917 Před 10 měsíci +16

    I live in America, and it's news to me that African American women are "infatuated" with Nigerian men or even care to be chosen by said men. I mean, really?!?!

    • @bdouglas9723
      @bdouglas9723 Před 10 měsíci +8

      Cause it's not true.

    • @htownqueen663
      @htownqueen663 Před 9 měsíci +3

      The depiction of Nigerian men on Housewives shows have out this on the map. A lot of AA women want to date successful Nigerian men.

    • @sherwood9917
      @sherwood9917 Před 9 měsíci +4

      @@htownqueen663 What does "have out this on the map" mean? Nonetheless, I would urge you not to use reality tv as a barometer of the desires of AA women.

    • @introspectator2100
      @introspectator2100 Před 9 měsíci +1

      I didn't even know that there were any Nigerians in the country until I read about it on the Internet a couple of years ago! Real talk!

    • @htownqueen663
      @htownqueen663 Před 9 měsíci +2

      @sherwood9917 unfortunately MANY AA women watch these shows and idolize the women and their lifestyles on these shows, so my point is very valid.

  • @AkireMaru
    @AkireMaru Před 10 měsíci +19

    Don’t have a culture? The interviewer is as smart as a box of rocks. One 2 second search on the internet would allow her to understand the definition of culture. Blacks do have culture. It may not be highly esteemed, but it’s everything from the way they speak, the names the call their kids (which are unique - you can easily spot “black names”), to the food and music they listen to. I’m truly baffled she, as a black woman, would say something like that.

    • @franman576
      @franman576 Před 8 měsíci

      Yes that interviewer is an embarassment.

    • @hazelhanover8935
      @hazelhanover8935 Před 7 měsíci +1

      She mean black American woman is not train and cultured or raise like a African woman is raise but hip hop music is America culture

  • @patrickpedro6458
    @patrickpedro6458 Před 10 měsíci +51

    One thing you all most know that, no matter what, Nigerians still like Africa America more than anyone else ❤

    • @Mkym365
      @Mkym365 Před 10 měsíci +10

      Very true and a lot of Nigerian men marry African American women.

    • @tonirowe1975
      @tonirowe1975 Před 10 měsíci +10

      @@Mkym365that’s so true I am married to a Nigerian man and we honestly have a lot in common and also we have our differences but we blend together and we have learned to respect and love our differences

    • @ambrosebarigyemukiga
      @ambrosebarigyemukiga Před 10 měsíci +13

      It is simple..Most African Americans have west African ancestry especially Ghana and Nigeria so that is the reason why..Blood is always thicker than water

    • @voguehaven5154
      @voguehaven5154 Před 10 měsíci

      🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣@@Mkym365

    • @chikaajene7683
      @chikaajene7683 Před 10 měsíci

      Do African American really like Nigerian men .. or just the stereotypical glitz and glamour associated with Nigerian men. It’s all fun and games until they are faced with marriage ,raising kids , dealing with extended families , religious and cultural belief , respect and so on .

  • @done5060
    @done5060 Před 10 měsíci +70

    My mother is Alabama born, DC raised… she met my dad precisely 62 years ago.. 6 years after marriage, she compelled my dad to move the family back to Nigeria… I still don’t understand *WHY* … now I’m in my 40’s, I’m glad she did

    • @uchennaegbuna7208
      @uchennaegbuna7208 Před 10 měsíci +3

      Ditto a real brother from the motherland

    • @ProsperousJanetta
      @ProsperousJanetta Před 10 měsíci +18

      Awe ❤my husband and I have been married for almost 19 years next month. He is from Ondo State and I am from GA. We have two sons and purchased land in Nigeria in 2012 and finally finished building this year.

    • @Tiktok_Reddit
      @Tiktok_Reddit Před 10 měsíci +3

      @@ProsperousJanettacongratulations, when is the house warming… I’m in a university in Ondo state

    • @chinneynz7861
      @chinneynz7861 Před 10 měsíci

      Awesome!

    • @ProsperousJanetta
      @ProsperousJanetta Před 9 měsíci +1

      @@Tiktok_Reddit ayyyeeee how you dey 😂 it's in Abuja see you there ohhhhh

  • @uchennanwosu4625
    @uchennanwosu4625 Před 10 měsíci +26

    Today, I am a born-again Christian. I am a widower, and I don't date. In my dating days, I was fearful of Black American women. This is because I am Igbo. Our culture is very conservative. It is very ordered and somewhat predictable. As much as I have always interacted with fairly polished and educated Black American women, I always had this fear of surprises. I was concerned about the upbringing. I have somewhat changed. I think social media is opening me up. I just recently viewed content from a young Black American woman. I found her so impressive as a person that if I were twenty years younger, I would be laying out my strategy to win her. In fact, I am praying she finds that very special man. She is seeking a relationship with a Nigerian man, and I hope she finds the right one.

    • @msk7458
      @msk7458 Před 10 měsíci +1

      That is so kind of you to look out for the younger generation

    • @ProsperousJanetta
      @ProsperousJanetta Před 10 měsíci +6

      I like how you started your comment by saying you are a born again Christian. When my husband and I first got married I would introduce him as a Nigerian and he would correct me and say I'm a Christian first who is Nigerian. I never looked for a Nigerian man I prayed for a Christian man. God has blessed us to married for going on 19 years, two handsome and intelligent sons, and we started businesses and a ministry together. God is good and when you trust Him He will over rule traditions of men.

    • @uchennanwosu4625
      @uchennanwosu4625 Před 10 měsíci +2

      @ProsperousJanetta Praise the Lord!!!!!!! Very vital point. Your identity and mine are rooted in Jesus Christ. My race, ethnicity, and family are important to the extent that they were determined by the Lord. However, I distill all truth by the Word of God. I understand God's Word by the Holy Spirit. We are the sons and daughters of Abraham by faith. In Paul's words, which I totally receive, we are the Israel of God.

    • @ProsperousJanetta
      @ProsperousJanetta Před 10 měsíci

      @@uchennanwosu4625 amennnn ohhhh 🙏🏾

    • @stevenwilliams3015
      @stevenwilliams3015 Před 10 měsíci +3

      Have you all asked yourselves where Christianity was rooted from? How it was pass unto your ancestors? Whether it was passed by force? The intention behind spreading Christianity to us? And was it the same people that enslaved , colonized us and still neo colonizing today? Are they the same people that erased our history? Painted our tradition as evil while their Christianity is the best? As blacks, we should learn to ask ourselves these questions in order for you to dig deeper. This people are so focused on us and how to keep us down forever until will rise against them, they are fighting us mentally, physically, spiritually and in any means necessary and we still don't want to learn. Why should you think your greatest enemy, the same people that enslaved, colonized and still pressing you down will give you a religion that will do good things for you?

  • @mythoughts1763
    @mythoughts1763 Před 10 měsíci +15

    THIS INTERVIEWER IS TOO DISRESPECTFUL, SHAMEFUL, AND DISTASTEFUL!! TOO THIRSTY!!

    • @UNSCRIPTEDSHAWNRAY
      @UNSCRIPTEDSHAWNRAY Před 4 měsíci +2

      I totally agree with you. trust me she is giving African American Ladies a bad rep

    • @mythoughts1763
      @mythoughts1763 Před 4 měsíci

      @@UNSCRIPTEDSHAWNRAY SHE IS TRYING REAL BAD!!!!!

    • @aidan2849
      @aidan2849 Před 2 měsíci

      @@mythoughts1763she’s African American?

    • @mythoughts1763
      @mythoughts1763 Před 2 měsíci

      @@aidan2849 IDK, BUT I AM CONFUSED HERE, WHAT IS THE POINT!!!!

    • @aidan2849
      @aidan2849 Před 2 měsíci

      @@mythoughts1763 even me as Nigerian American knows AA’s have cukture I’ve literally seen and participated in it in school, block parties(which is an AA creation, and the music genres they’ve created which I’ve listened to. Not to mention west central, and east Africans as well as bantu but specifically west Africans have superior physical genetics to the rest of the world which is scientifically proven the result of which we can see in the sport world. So I don’t get why an AA is belittling their own achievements when the whole world is entertained by them. An entertainment isn’t where it stops, they have also helped industrially even when massacres happened to tear their businesses down.

  • @avigrett1484
    @avigrett1484 Před 11 měsíci +77

    I went against my mum and married an American lady and I payed a price . I was cocooned from my family.A lot of Alimony. I am full of regrets. Never be blinded by love . An American woman will leave you at your weakest moment. Like he said not every hypothesis is 100%.

    • @ekwejohnson6965
      @ekwejohnson6965 Před 10 měsíci +15

      Marriage is business for the Akata's

    • @obdanny2000
      @obdanny2000 Před 10 měsíci +35

      ​​@@ekwejohnson6965Stop calling them akatar, thats very disrespectful

    • @EvwienureEjowokeoghene-uh5iq
      @EvwienureEjowokeoghene-uh5iq Před 10 měsíci

      ​@@ekwejohnson6965Nigerians living in America are also called akata in Nigeria

    • @donkarsh
      @donkarsh Před 10 měsíci +18

      @@obdanny2000stfu bruh, akata simply means black American and Oyinbo means white American

    • @obdanny2000
      @obdanny2000 Před 10 měsíci

      @donkarsh They don't like it, so shut up. People use it in a condescending manner and you know it.

  • @childrentoys4537
    @childrentoys4537 Před 10 měsíci +22

    That is why i love our Nigerian men. They are naturally leaders & very confident.

    • @binwoods23
      @binwoods23 Před 10 měsíci +13

      Leaders? How is Nigeria doing?

    • @childrentoys4537
      @childrentoys4537 Před 10 měsíci +1

      @@binwoods23Politically speaking, we know we have the misfortune of bad leadership which are being led by men. However, it does not negate the fact that majority of them have successfully led in establishments, corporations & most importantly as good leaders in their homes.
      I don't know if you are a Nigerian or not. If you are following the political space of the country, you should know we are not resting on our oars to to shut the mouth of people like you very soon.

    • @fataiadegbenro984
      @fataiadegbenro984 Před 10 měsíci +4

      ​@@binwoods23we aren't doing a good job on the collective unfortunately not for lack of intellectual capabilities to do so but selfish and unpatriotic interests but I believe we are seeing the advantage of collective over individuals now and watch out for the country

    • @Music-yq8qc
      @Music-yq8qc Před 10 měsíci +6

      ​@binwoods23 The Same way every other black community is doing. Neo colonialism is behind Nigeria down fall

    • @hashtagblackwomen-ih6iu
      @hashtagblackwomen-ih6iu Před 10 měsíci +5

      Leading in what? Flies and Mud huts? Since when are black American women begging to be a part of this. Im cracking up 😂😂😂

  • @ImeUdo-ObongMesoEx
    @ImeUdo-ObongMesoEx Před 9 měsíci +38

    I like this conversation with NOSH. I am Nigerian and I believe conversations like this must be happening constantly to close the gap and understanding between our cultures. It matters so much that we understand each other more and more. We actually need each other....especially in THIS generation.

    • @letstalkovercocktails
      @letstalkovercocktails  Před 9 měsíci +13

      Thank you for watching and understanding my approach! I respect the African culture and also love being an African American woman. We will continue to educate and positively promote change in our communities. 🙏🏽❤️✨

    • @tamiausten873
      @tamiausten873 Před 5 měsíci +1

      True dat. My cousins in America are married to African Americans. One in New York, the other in Dallas. Another is married to a white man. We are all people. I've always loved African American stuff, from movies to songs to comedy and even the way they speak. I know the loss of African culture is there but watching them, it seems like not much is different. In church Nigerians dress up and African Americans do same. The flashy and extravagant head gear might be of different types but the idea is the same 😂😂 the negroe women in different colors in the church and big head gears, either gele or hats 😂😂😂.

  • @amaradumbuya2099
    @amaradumbuya2099 Před 7 měsíci +15

    As African man from Sierra Leone it is an African man culture to take care of the woman and the household,no 50/50,if we take woman out we are paying all the way all the time,same with shopping

    • @PhyllisShepherd
      @PhyllisShepherd Před 5 měsíci +1

      Nothing is wrong with that. Is the woman allowed to have a career or business?

    • @1653tlw
      @1653tlw Před 5 měsíci +1

      You sir do not know our history...Black Americans take care of our families also. Up until the 1970s things has gotten expensive in this country so both have to work.If it wasn't for black Americans fighting for equal rights in the 1960s you sir would not be living in this country. I lived in West African countries and there is a lot of single parent homes.And what about all the orphanages...Please don't hand me that bull. lots of African men walk out of there families every day. I see African men stay at home while there wife goes out and work with the baby on her back. Get your facts Strat..and don't promote negative propaganda..

    • @amaradumbuya2099
      @amaradumbuya2099 Před 5 měsíci +1

      ​@@PhyllisShepherdoff course that what we like

    • @amaradumbuya2099
      @amaradumbuya2099 Před 5 měsíci

      ​@@1653tlwsecondly The biggest Cardinal Sin an African man can commit is not having respect from your peers,family,strangers and women in general,that why I fight every day for my respect ,respect is huge for a man in Africa it almost suicidal,that why those boys will rather die in the sea trying to get to Europe on a boat so they can provide for their family than stay at home in shame,this is real stuff baby girl I love black women and I dated a lot of them

    • @DonaldOYewande
      @DonaldOYewande Před 5 měsíci +3

      @@PhyllisShepherd Why not? The DG of World Trade Organization is a Nigerian woman, responsible mother and a dutiful wife. The richest African woman is a Nigerian, the lists goes on and on

  • @changestartsnow5116
    @changestartsnow5116 Před měsícem +2

    Just because we don't worship tribalism doesn't mean we don't have culture as FBAs

  • @Takeitorweaveitbeauty
    @Takeitorweaveitbeauty Před 11 měsíci +54

    My blood is boiling 😡 I’m proud of being African American! Nothing is wrong with us… we’ve just been through a lot… we all have! Africans are not perfect they have the same problems too…. I know several west Africans ! Nigerians Ghanaian’s,Cameroonians ,Gambians etc Go to Lagos and see how perfect they are!!!! All black is excellent and beautiful!Don’t bash us like we’re so messed up …. Im
    tired of that! I’m extremely disappointed. You are literally lying on US! How sad.

    • @undergee8609
      @undergee8609 Před 10 měsíci +28

      I am Nigerian and I endorse this message. The host needs some self pride. It’s unfortunate that she said nothing positive about her own kind. Horrid and cringeworthy display of pick me behaviour.

    • @363y
      @363y Před 10 měsíci +11

      Giirrrlll I stared to comment on this but I said you know what I’m not!. But one thing I’m going to say is that this is “NOT A US THING”! Speak for yourself!!. Crazy smh 🤦🏽‍♀️

    • @tayomed
      @tayomed Před 10 měsíci +16

      You're right. Africans have a lot of societal and ideological issues to work on, just like Black people all over the world. There's a lot we can learn from each other.

    • @letstalkovercocktails
      @letstalkovercocktails  Před 10 měsíci +2

      @@tayomed I appreciate that comment. You’re right!

    • @Nethanda
      @Nethanda Před 10 měsíci

      Lmao you lot chat shit about Africans too. I mean its your men on YT calling African women ugly so stop acting all hurt, holy, and innocent.

  • @Mkym365
    @Mkym365 Před 10 měsíci +31

    Also, If an African American woman is willing to accept the Nigerian culture & understand it, she will be Exactly what Nigerian men needs as long as other wife able qualities aRe present.

    • @ashburnconnecttv7860
      @ashburnconnecttv7860 Před 10 měsíci +2

      #Tribalism

    • @Mkym365
      @Mkym365 Před 10 měsíci

      @@ashburnconnecttv7860 Not really!

    • @godschild4615
      @godschild4615 Před 9 měsíci +3

      @Mkym. But she wont accept polygamy though should the man decide to take a second wife

    • @user-gt8dt7bu2t
      @user-gt8dt7bu2t Před 9 měsíci +1

      ​@@godschild4615correct. I told him I'm not down with that. He says I'm not either. Thank goodness. 😂🎉❤

    • @user-gt8dt7bu2t
      @user-gt8dt7bu2t Před 9 měsíci +2

      I'm willing. I love the culture. Love from. 🇺🇸

  • @jamash7143
    @jamash7143 Před 9 měsíci +9

    Nigerians are just conservative as a society. Culture dictates everything we do as a people. The culture is also what is responsible for the majority of our society in this country.

  • @deardapson9311
    @deardapson9311 Před 10 měsíci +63

    Akata means Panther, because the first time Nigerians were exposed to African American was through Fela Kuti the creator of Afrobeat. When he came to NYC, he was hosted by the Black Panther movement. When he return to Nigeria, he changed his style to revolutionary music. Back then Nigerians assume all African Americans are members of the Black Panther Movement and the loved it. Akata is a Yoruba word Panther. It's the other tribes telling their African American friends that it means Animal because they don't know the roots or the meaning.

    • @adjoa-anima
      @adjoa-anima Před 10 měsíci

      Wild cat

    • @TheHairloveundone
      @TheHairloveundone Před 10 měsíci +5

      100 percent correct

    • @michaeli6280
      @michaeli6280 Před 10 měsíci +18

      @@adjoa-anima A panther is a wild cat isn’t it? You are a Ghanaian interpreting the Yoruba language wrongly, this is how ignorance is spread

    • @blackseed9293
      @blackseed9293 Před 10 měsíci

      ​@@michaeli6280Are you saying the explanation is incorrect?

    • @akendon7260
      @akendon7260 Před 10 měsíci +5

      Stop claiming what you don't know. I speak Yoruba and Igbo. Akata is an Igbo word for chaos, dysfunction and instability. Basically a thing or person that causes chaos and dysfunction. It's another word for Pokie and Ray Ray. You will notice Nigerians use it solely for Pokie and Ray Ray. I'll post videos of Igbo songs saying Akata in it to prove this. Post a yoruba video saying Akata.

  • @shalanda411
    @shalanda411 Před 11 měsíci +25

    I enjoyed this conversation. It’s rare for me to watch podcasts but this topic is dear to me as I am a lover of African culture and find myself dating within that pool of people. This conversation sheds light on what it’s like from both perspectives if you’re looking to date intercultural.

    • @letstalkovercocktails
      @letstalkovercocktails  Před 10 měsíci +6

      Thank you for watching! I appreciate your ability to truly understand the goal. ✨

  • @bettysmith5678
    @bettysmith5678 Před 10 měsíci +81

    I love being African American and wouldn't change if I could... Had the best of upbringings. Good morals happy childhood life,.both parents like no other.

    • @letstalkovercocktails
      @letstalkovercocktails  Před 10 měsíci +4

      I can relate… I also had an amazing upbringing… and I wouldn’t change being African American, yep, both parents… life was whole. I simply wish we had a respectable culture that many can relate to… it’s not disrespect.

    • @kelleo9213
      @kelleo9213 Před 10 měsíci +1

      Excatly raised with 4 sisters, both parents, all went to college, 3 of us married. Great childhood, they hang with ratchet club girls and equate all black women to that standard, ridiculously ignorant.

    • @letstalkovercocktails
      @letstalkovercocktails  Před 10 měsíci +1

      @@kelleo9213 I love that! Both of my parents are married, aunts and uncles… great foundation. We all went to college, morals and values… but how can we help the younger generations have those same values?

    • @letstalkovercocktails
      @letstalkovercocktails  Před 10 měsíci +3

      @@kelleo9213 it is ridiculous and ignorant but that’s what I’m saying… because the culture is so loose and respectful traditions are not passed on….the internet and entertainment is raising them. That’s exactly what I’m saying.
      I went to a private social marketing meeting… they had pictures displayed of different types of “subjects” you had to stereotype this person based off society/marketing… there were black business men, rappers, video vixens, lawyers and doctors displayed- all African American. The question to the mix race group was, who has the greater influence…. 76% said The AA person, the next question was, with what influence/ culture… 90% said the entertainer/ rapper represented the AA culture. It’s quite interesting…

    • @kelleo9213
      @kelleo9213 Před 10 měsíci +1

      @@letstalkovercocktails That is quite interesting but not surprising. In 2007 I sported dred locks in Nigeria while living there with my family. It was so surprising that my Sista locs were my hair. In the US Nigerian community when I first started them, Nigerian women were so negative calling me Dada Mama😁, am I going to comb my hair, why should I be doing that to my hair? P sqaure and Flavor afrobeat started and bam it was popular, and women started having them as well as men. Those stars also started having children out of wedlock openly and it seemed to be an upswing at that same time. That study is accurate 👌

  • @osascorpomoregie8104
    @osascorpomoregie8104 Před 10 měsíci +40

    The fact he said we Nigerians spend on our women made you happy and I believe it made a lot of American black women happy but there is something he didn’t say, we also care about respect, if I’m taking care of you the least you can give me is your submission and complete respect which I believe the black American man yearns for from black American women which most of them don’t want to do, so let the black American women fix their issues of submission and I believe the black American men will take better care of them.

    • @CapricornDaze
      @CapricornDaze Před 10 měsíci +12

      If a man needs a woman to submit to him, he has an issue with his own self-esteem and wants the woman to lower her standards to meet his.

    • @james56660
      @james56660 Před 10 měsíci +20

      @@CapricornDaze+ Not at all. If I’m taking care of home.The least you can do is be respectful. It’s not too much to ask.Nigerian men are Sigma males and would like to navigate their ships without running it aground with a co-pilot.

    • @osascorpomoregie8104
      @osascorpomoregie8104 Před 10 měsíci

      @@CapricornDaze if as a person you do not understand gender roles in a family setting you have a long learning to do, life is not a multivational class where you get a mentor to boost you confidence all the time in order to do what is required of you to keep the family going, if you lack basic respect for anyone at all around you, you have a lot to learn, if you can decide to marry a person it should be the one you think you can trust because you know he can lead you through the right path but if the least you can give Is your submission to his leadership for the growth of the family then what stops you from doing that, the problem of the west and America is thinking we all can switch into different gender roles, everyone has a responsibility of manning their post, be a woman and act on your responsibilities and stop thinking of how to take the place of a man. You’ve not even been able to completely carry out your responsibilities you want to take upon yourself the responsibilities of a man.

    • @user-gn1gf8kq9d
      @user-gn1gf8kq9d Před 10 měsíci +1

      You are SPOT ON!!!! 🔥👍

    • @tonirowe1975
      @tonirowe1975 Před 10 měsíci +1

      I completely disagree with you on this one

  • @TheYakora
    @TheYakora Před 9 měsíci +5

    The host is absolutely is pissing me off. She is coming off like a bit of an air head. Talking about african american culture.. where is she really from seriously. She cant be serious

  • @damilolamonehin7877
    @damilolamonehin7877 Před 10 měsíci +8

    I really appreciate his perspective on a number of things. It seemed like she was asking questions more for a self qualification assessment. It's also a good practice to avoid touching people in professional interviews

  • @ronj7658
    @ronj7658 Před 10 měsíci +10

    To an average African, African American culture is incomplete due to the long separation from their ancestors.

    • @letstalkovercocktails
      @letstalkovercocktails  Před 10 měsíci +2

      I agree with the 💯 this is on the the realist comments. Bingo! That’s where the cultural divide starts for AA… that’s all I’m saying. When you understand your foundation- in Anything… you hold value and longevity.

    • @ronj7658
      @ronj7658 Před 10 měsíci +1

      @letstalkovercocktails indeed. We are in the information age now so I believe we can all learn from each other and our cultures will eventually coalesce.

    • @sherryamanfor
      @sherryamanfor Před 10 měsíci

      I agree

    • @chinneynz7861
      @chinneynz7861 Před 10 měsíci

      Ain't that the truth though ?

    • @jacklyneverage3881
      @jacklyneverage3881 Před 9 měsíci

      Africans don't even practice their culture when they worshipping in religions they did not create and worshipping their Euro colonizers! Black American culture is incomplete. It's intact and suitable for our environment and circumstances. No, we don't need your tribalism and ethnic hatred.

  • @sbmars7137
    @sbmars7137 Před 8 měsíci +12

    Do people in America even realise that in Africa, Nigeria included, most men would not even marry a woman who is not if their tribe? This is not a Nigerian/African vs American African issue...it's about people who are raised to marry their own

    • @DonaldOYewande
      @DonaldOYewande Před 5 měsíci +2

      How old are you? You spoke like a 60 year old.

    • @tigerinthecityalozie2812
      @tigerinthecityalozie2812 Před 4 měsíci

      That's not true any longer. Things have changed.

    • @carlitosway644
      @carlitosway644 Před 4 měsíci +1

      I feel like this is true for certain tribes but not for all tribes. I'm a AA married to an Igbo man for almost 21 yrs.

    • @sbmars7137
      @sbmars7137 Před 4 měsíci

      @@tigerinthecityalozie2812 It hasn't changed that much.There's still inter-tribal fights in most African countries : checkout the herdsmen Vs farmers in Nigeria.Politics is still very tribal in most African countries: check out the last gubernatorial elections in Lagos state.
      When you're in love, you're in a bubble and think the world is as colourful as your bubble

    • @sbmars7137
      @sbmars7137 Před 4 měsíci

      @@carlitosway644 It's true literally for all tribes ... every family's wishes their son marry the beautiful girl from down the street. It's individuals that make the exception, not the tribe.

  • @verdaylove
    @verdaylove Před 10 měsíci +15

    We are broken and also thriving. The beautiful duality of life. We are still African afteralllllll. :)

  • @tayomed
    @tayomed Před 10 měsíci +24

    There's no one answer to this question. I've met some really awesome American sisters who I would have married if not for the relocation issue.
    Most Africans who plan on moving back to Africa in the future would have a hard time relocating an American woman and her kids back to Africa. So, the man would have to go back to Africa alone and remarry over there if he's really determined to move back.
    I've seen African men "stuck" in America due to marrying AAs, white, Filipina and Hispanic women. The issue isn't really about anything wrong with Black American women, the issue is just a logistic issue.

    • @done5060
      @done5060 Před 10 měsíci +2

      Just like you said - no one answer.
      Everyone does what is best for them.
      One thing I know is if the couple have excellent communication, there is no issue about this.. I just shared on another thread on this vlog… 6yrs after my mum married a Yoruba man, already with two kids, they both returned to Nigeria… my mum keeps saying till date.. that’s the best decision of her life. Interestingly, I’ve seen couples in same situation where “moving to Africa” is a negative game changer for the relationship

    • @karinamoses790
      @karinamoses790 Před měsícem

      They don’t have to do anything they plan to leave their children in America that’s just a man with selfish desires they should just stick with the African ladies instead of using Americans

    • @karinamoses790
      @karinamoses790 Před měsícem

      And nobody is stuck everyone is free to move around they feel trapped cause they planned to be trapped for green card

  • @___john3934
    @___john3934 Před 10 měsíci +12

    "I am Nigerian i don't live in the USA .Personally, I find it easier to converse with Caucasian women than with African American women. I believe it's merely a matter of perception. I think that white women tend to be more compassionate and understanding. Personally, I sense that African Americans can sometimes be quick to degrade or belittle me due to my African heritage, and at times, they speak very rapidly. However, I do like them, and I wish I could engage with them more, but I often feel somewhat apprehensive."

    • @nezinez2694
      @nezinez2694 Před 9 měsíci

      Very sad comment.

    • @jeffreytube
      @jeffreytube Před 9 měsíci +3

      They tend to be too toxic. I'm sorry to say that but what I see on social media tells me that

    • @chimaobi3747
      @chimaobi3747 Před 9 měsíci

      @@jeffreytube social media contain many lies

    • @jefflugard5483
      @jefflugard5483 Před 9 měsíci +1

      U are very correct my brother

    • @carlitosway644
      @carlitosway644 Před 4 měsíci +1

      This is not true. Social media doesn't always represent Black American women in the best light. Also I've found that the way Africans speak to white women or white people in general is oh so gentle. When speaking with AA, Africans tend to be condescending and less respectful. It's like you think you're so much better than AA. Btw, I've been married to a Nigerian for over 20 yrs. I've seen this first hand.

  • @rubydawnintl
    @rubydawnintl Před 10 měsíci +9

    All Skin Folks Are Not Kin Folk. Most of the host's opinions reflect a willfully ignorant and desperately thirsty perspective of African American lifestyles. Self hate has apparently & overwhelmingly influenced her beliefs about African American culture. Actually, I find it incredulous that she, herself, believes what came out of her mouth. It had to be about garnering views and subscribers.

  • @arisewitharica
    @arisewitharica Před 9 měsíci +7

    This whole interview pissed me off 😤 Both are ignorant and do not need to speak on behalf of their entire communities, African American or Nigerian. There's so much misinformation in this interview. As someone who has studied in Ghana, has a degree in Africana Studies, lives in Nigeria, and married to a Nigerian, I will say African Americans & Nigerians are more similar than different. Hell, many of us African Americans, African peoples in the diaspora, are from the yoruba tribe. I wish there was more understanding between us instead of judgment or perpetuating stereotypes. Some of Nigeria/Nigerians face very similar issues in their communities/cultural context. And, there's plenty of African American women & Nigerian men who are happily married.
    This host needs to get more exposure. This interview was sad to watch!
    🇺🇸❤️🇳🇬

  • @jetblack1854
    @jetblack1854 Před 9 měsíci +6

    We dont struggle with no damn identity. Black women struggle with having a positive identity

    • @letstalkovercocktails
      @letstalkovercocktails  Před 9 měsíci

      Hmm that can be true… but doesn’t that derive from a lack of generational/ traditional culture?

    • @jetblack1854
      @jetblack1854 Před 9 měsíci

      What, black women sold their identity out when they sold black men out and bought into the whyte man's feminism. As black people, when the men were in charge, we had values, traditions, language and religion. Now most foreigners from west africa don't even know their birthday or their grandparents birthdays. Foreign blacks are the ones who lack culture and identity. Most of those tribes today are a result of colonialism. Foreign black have know knowledge of their history of their origins . Foreign blacks cannot trace their lineage pre colonialism

    • @Boon159
      @Boon159 Před 5 měsíci +3

      We…sho DONT struggle with identity….we know who we are….

  • @tanishanightingale
    @tanishanightingale Před 10 měsíci +9

    African Americans do have culture and food. What the hell is she saying? I am from Panamá in Central America and I can say African American have culture and food.

    • @letstalkovercocktails
      @letstalkovercocktails  Před 10 měsíci +4

      You’re from Central America… that’s a culture. Carly is from LA… family came in by way slavery … there is no culture. Twerking and slave food is not apart of a transitional culture… it is a manufactured culture created by the media and people adapted…

    • @sweetjr25
      @sweetjr25 Před 9 měsíci

      @@letstalkovercocktails Central America and the Caribbean culture came from SLAVES too, genius. READ A BOOK!!!

    • @jacklyneverage3881
      @jacklyneverage3881 Před 9 měsíci

      @@letstalkovercocktails Slave food! Central America has slave food then! Because they also endured slavery! Twerking came from Africa and they do it today! We don't have a manufactured culture by the media! Slavery was before that media you ignorant person! We have soul food and it was plant based and it consists of foods that came from Africa and incorporates African cooking styles and it is mainly vegetables, fish, and poultry and grains! All those foods didn't originate in slavery! And the ones that did, that came from farm to table! It was organic! So then call farm to table food slave food!

  • @ThreeHundredd
    @ThreeHundredd Před 10 měsíci +68

    43:09 The general reason why Nigerian men hesitate to marry American women is because we think Americans in general do not take marriage seriously , are quick to opt out , do not cope well with structure and extended family this is the summary . The cultural differences . As a Nigerian I am not certain an American woman will be able to hold a family long term ,she could leave anytime even if things are going well . Another big issue is structure , an American woman will not be comfortable in the traditional family structure . It also seems like celebrities lead the culture in America which is detrimental to marriages . Others could include differences in perceived moral values or standards . Even if she’s a good person , she may do what the american system allows her to do like divorce just because she can and not because things are that bad . Besides that they are cool individuals but these reasons cast doubts on long term viability. I dated an AA for about 2 years , I grew to like her however i just wasn’t confident enough to take it further (long term) . American women are cute and likable as friends but for someone that takes marriage seriously it’s a big decision , a huge risk. Except if she’s the type of person that knows how to make a man 1000 % confident about her . These are my thoughts / observations

    • @ekwejohnson6965
      @ekwejohnson6965 Před 10 měsíci +1

      He didn't articulate his thoughts

    • @adaorahi
      @adaorahi Před 10 měsíci +7

      Valid points and 100% accurate. Cul😊differences play a huge role

    • @kelleo9213
      @kelleo9213 Před 10 měsíci +13

      What about the recent divorce rate in the Nigerian community has doubled?

    • @callmecat9715
      @callmecat9715 Před 10 měsíci +2

      Your response is pretty silly lol. There is no woman on the PLANET who divorces a man “just because she can” 😂 A woman will divorce a man because he’s either abusive mentally and or physically, distant, lazy, confrontational and mean, a cheater (and we all know Nigerian men are notorious for being cheaters), someone who could care less about providing for her emotional needs because he’s only all about himself, and so on and so forth. It’s not just about bringing home a paycheck dude! It’s about bringing home ALL OF YOU. You are suppose to contribute more than just a check in a healthy, functional relationship. American women, as opposed to traditional Nigerian women understand that…. they MATTER just as much as a man does. Her position isn’t to be the servant of the house, but to be an equal and respected partner. So if this mentality supposedly makes American women " not marriage material” then….. THANK GOD 😂😂😂

    • @victorylapp
      @victorylapp Před 10 měsíci +14

      @@kelleo9213 Some people get americanized once in America

  • @Nwankwo1234
    @Nwankwo1234 Před 14 dny +2

    Well…..all I can say is; I’m a AA woman who married a sweet handsome African King and so glad I did. I’ll do it all over again. On top of it all I told him I’m excited to know when the time comes we will be moving back to his village. My husband’s culture is my culture, we are one now. All I want is to make him the happiest man on this earth until Christ comes. I’m so in love with him until I wish I could stand on a mountain top and tell the world.

  • @kolaafolabi3688
    @kolaafolabi3688 Před 10 měsíci +25

    In an iota of words, Nigerians see black African Americans as brothers and sisters in the first instance but feel terribly bad and disappointed when they are totally different from being friendly, loving brothers and sisters we wish they be. I presume a lot of African Americans don’t see African as real brothers, I may be wrong

    • @caramelkisses8396
      @caramelkisses8396 Před 10 měsíci +6

      There are so many that do see you as our brothers and sisters. I can honestly say that from most Nigerians, and Ghanaians that I know or see on SM, and in movies feel that way. However, the same can't be said for a lot of other African countries who don't see us as such.

    • @miacrawfordmc
      @miacrawfordmc Před 10 měsíci +4

      I see Nigerians as my sisters and brothers! On the other hand, I’ve had some express that “you’re not African American” because I wasn’t born in Africa. That pisses me off

    • @wb6266
      @wb6266 Před 10 měsíci

      It depends. All humans are the same. Just like any other group, there are a lot of different opposing cultures, perspectives, and people within the African-American community. Some see Africans as brothers and sisters and CANNOT WAIT to be part of the community or visit different African countries. Others are ashamed of being black, and will make fun of their own people and of course, Africans, and everyone else. The same goes for different Africans I meet; some hate us, and some love us...

    • @ashburnconnecttv7860
      @ashburnconnecttv7860 Před 10 měsíci

      R U deflecting?

    • @jayfizz545
      @jayfizz545 Před 8 měsíci +2

      @@caramelkisses8396well genetically most of you guys are Nigerian or Ghanaian, others don’t see you that way bc africa is very divided and you guys aren’t really their kin

  • @aissatamuhammad2581
    @aissatamuhammad2581 Před 10 měsíci +8

    My aunt is married to a Nigerian...the Idehen's are my in-laws. Verrry nice people. 🤗

  • @tonih4887
    @tonih4887 Před 11 měsíci +28

    The arrogance of it all. The fact that you were given the opportunity to come to America after Black Americans fought for Civil Rights. The Fair Immigration Act 1965 giving all non Europeans access to immigrate into this country. We fought for their right to be here and should not allow or put up with the disrespect. Black Americans do have a culture. Yes we have issues but there are issues in all cultures. The Nigerians who come here did not go through cattle slavery, Jim Crow and government institutional segregation and racist policies like Jim Crow, red lining etc. Let’s have more respect and honor for who we are and what we have gone through.

    • @adenugaba
      @adenugaba Před 11 měsíci +21

      My sister, you provided the free labor and we Africans provided the minerals and cash crops for free. Educate yourself, we are both victims. Don't fall into the trap of blaming each other while the culprits are walking free, like great benefactors.

    • @avigrett1484
      @avigrett1484 Před 11 měsíci +9

      Some of our parents were here before civil rights. Stop all these venom . My uncle was here in 1955 . Go get some education and stop all these arid remarks . Nnamdi Azikiwe was here in 1920 . Stop this craziness.

    • @chazomoore
      @chazomoore Před 10 měsíci +6

      What are you saying, did you think that we don't come to America before 1965 you guys fought for yourselves not for us ,my Uncle went to America to study before 1954 I wonder where you got your data from, my other uncle did his engineering studies in Sweden go do your research, you guys never fought for us take your angry self out , I married Africa American woman and is the best decision I ever made

    • @sunnyyande378
      @sunnyyande378 Před 10 měsíci +3

      @tonih4887, what makes you think you are not arrogant? Did you in person fight for civil right? What makes you think you faught for others right to be in America? Grow up!

    • @mariejane1567
      @mariejane1567 Před 10 měsíci +5

      @@chazomoorehe couldn't come if it wasn't for us period. Pick a year fool.....

  • @cherylizegbu3581
    @cherylizegbu3581 Před 10 měsíci +18

    Mr. Nigeria, I've been to Lagos. Death is a daily occurrence there. Because you have traveled, you can gaslight people who haven't, but don't get it twisted. Clean up the corruption that continues to run amok, and then You can talk about African Americans!

    • @Barbiette123
      @Barbiette123 Před 10 měsíci

      You know Black Men rather talk, prance like peacocks and subjugate women, than improve their communities and lead by example...lol

    • @chinneynz7861
      @chinneynz7861 Před 10 měsíci +9

      This is exactly what he was alluding to. Don't get triggered when you hear the truth. He never said his country was perfect, heck Americans get shot everyday, even in schools. The point is that if AA cultures starts valuing family and their men stop the dead-beat culture, you would be surprised by what will unfold. When you guys (AA) don't value your own BEAUTIFUL womwn, then whoi is going to value or want them?

    • @htownqueen663
      @htownqueen663 Před 9 měsíci +5

      ​@chinneynz7861 as an American I second this.

    • @destinyadam1160
      @destinyadam1160 Před 6 měsíci +4

      Why are you upset he's right

  • @alhenzyemma2957
    @alhenzyemma2957 Před 10 měsíci +9

    Good conversations & she is beautiful as well. As a Nigerian 🇳🇬 he was honest too.

  • @mahaganyogoke
    @mahaganyogoke Před 11 měsíci +24

    it’s so much to say about this interview but honestly i couldn’t even finish it. i literally felt i’ll watching This woman feed all these inaccuracies and false Narratives. as for the guy i have nothing to say, he is speaking from his experiences and what i would call a limited base. im so disappointed in this lady as an African American. i encourage anyone viewing this to take these about my people with a grain of salt. please seek FACTS and speak with those who have PRIDE AND KNOWLEDGE IN AFRICAN AMERICAN CULTURE!!! YES FOLKS I
    SAID ***CULTURE*** Blessings to everyone ❤

    • @avigrett1484
      @avigrett1484 Před 11 měsíci +7

      Why are you people so emotional and easily triggered ?

    • @jamman8678
      @jamman8678 Před 10 měsíci +5

      Brother your right in every society you have good and bad. But let’s be honest. Our people lost their culture as the late dr Henry Clark put it. This was by design.
      Yet Africans who are born in the Americans do behave the same at times.

    • @mariejane1567
      @mariejane1567 Před 10 měsíci +1

      is she FBA?

    • @mariejane1567
      @mariejane1567 Před 10 měsíci

      @@avigrett1484you people? It's giving tethered white supremacy

    • @undergee8609
      @undergee8609 Před 10 měsíci +12

      Facts. There is a culture and ut is beautiful when it is adhered to. I say this as a Nigerian HBCU grad. I have seen multigenerational black excellence and it’s beautiful and highly inspirational. These guys have low standards as is evident in their choices and decide to paint everyone with the same brush. Madness.

  • @sharicawhite5053
    @sharicawhite5053 Před 11 měsíci +6

    This was a really good listen!

  • @Akpulosu
    @Akpulosu Před 10 měsíci +1

    Never ever spent time, ever, watching shows like this on CZcams or wherever, but this held me down all through. Nice and straight. Now following you….

  • @ajayiolugbenga3595
    @ajayiolugbenga3595 Před 4 měsíci +1

    This guy is absolutely telling the truth. He is honest and representative of us. I agree with him 100%

  • @isaac9ice
    @isaac9ice Před 10 měsíci +8

    My Nigerian brother spoke very well.

  • @uchennanwosu4625
    @uchennanwosu4625 Před 10 měsíci +29

    Informative! The Nigerian brother is very intelligent and insightful. The host is entreatable. Her humility enables her extract information. She is equally brilliant.
    I don't think Nigerians dislike Black Americans. It's simply about perceptions, trust, and culture. Personally, I have difficulty communicating with Black Americans. The first time I encountered a Black American male, I was eager to connect because I felt we had a kindred spirit. I found him to be guarded. It was almost as if he was suspicious of me. Over the years, I discovered he wasn't the exception. Black Americans have their perception of Africans. I don't necessarily know the roots of these notions but especially among the men, it makes a close relationship a challenge. The American experience of the Black brother can be very confining. He has adapted based on historical and circumstantial lessons. The truth is that the world is far bigger than America. Blacl men in particular will benefit from travel outside the shores of this country. With the women, it's less of a problem. They have their stereotypes of Africans, but they seem to be more inquisitive. They are women at the end of the day. If they find a man attractive, they will take the risk. Black Americans women tend to be take charge. They feel they can get the man to align with their program. They will be quick to point out to an African man that they will not be subjected to the traditional role - their notion of the role of women. This is where the problem lies on both sides. The Nigerian man, in particular, is groomed to be a leader. Nobody is going to push him around. He demands respect from his woman. He will treat her like the queen only when he is convinced she is willing to cooperate. Just like their Black American brother, they feel that they have options. It's very rare that a man will disintegrate because he can not have a particular woman. I have personally met Black American women that are marriage ready. They are strong Christians. Their faith makes them a little more submissive and willing to be subject to a man. I think that we are living in a time that women as a whole are reconsidering feminism. They are weighing their options. Nigerian men are beginning to marry African American women. This is the result of pentecostal Christianity. It is breaking barriers. A man is destined by God to be a leader. He is a groom. He should be able to positively influence his woman. People don't come perfect. Love is a most effective shaping tool.

    • @juliatripp2010
      @juliatripp2010 Před 10 měsíci +6

      Well said. Id be submissive to a true leader, a kind and loving man. But so man AA men are hostile, and self hating I have learned to avoid them. I love African men, but dont know many, and I do think that there would be challenges. Im older now and content to watch this all play out from a distance

    • @jacklyneverage3881
      @jacklyneverage3881 Před 9 měsíci

      Why are you practicing a religion that isn't of your culture? Look here. How are you folks always bragging on your culture this and that but you uphold that British Western culture, worship a white Jesus, and practice a religion your people never invented? That Nigerian is an arrogant and an entitled bigot and that woman failed to promote her culture in a positive light because she is self loathing. Black Americans have a culture, and Black American women aren't chasing down African men for marriage. In fact, the opposite is happening that African men are aggressively pursuing Black American women for dating and mating as well as their own women. I never had to pursue or convince an African nowhere to date me at all. And I recently had two aggressively pursuing me! Again, we have our own culture and it is imitated the whole world over. At least parts of it. No one from Africa who got colonized by Euros and Asians and influenced by them cannot sit there arrogantly as if they were not impacted and they retained their culture 100% when they didn't and many outright reject certain aspects of their culture. You aren't going to preach to me about culture this and that when you fleeing to other countries and not using that great culture to build your own nation and it hasn't corrected your corruption or your tribalism! Get out of here with that!

  • @lamerrab7507
    @lamerrab7507 Před 10 měsíci +14

    Why do Africans feel like they have the right to tell African Americans anything......why are African Americans always the topic of discussion. Is there nothing about Nigeria that needs improvement. African Americans are attracted by every group of ppl no matter what skin color.

  • @kelleo9213
    @kelleo9213 Před 10 měsíci +17

    I was married 20 years to an Igbo man he had a mid life crisis and would not get therapy for his attraction to teenagers 😢

    • @ikhowaka1471
      @ikhowaka1471 Před 10 měsíci +3

      Therapy???😅😅😅 oh my God.. you made my day. Haven't laughed in almost a month. Thank you.

    • @kelleo9213
      @kelleo9213 Před 10 měsíci

      @@ikhowaka1471 it would have saved our marriage but he refused to get help, I wish it wasn't taboo in the community, especially Igbos have PTSD if they were a child in the Biafra conflict.

    • @chrismog286
      @chrismog286 Před 10 měsíci +4

      Most igbo men like younger women. If that's the reason for divorce, then there would be no marriages😂

    • @kelleo9213
      @kelleo9213 Před 10 měsíci

      @@chrismog286 she was 14 years old and we almost had our children taken away because we have two teens. Of course his brothers see nothing wrong with molesting secondary and primary school girls.. He is 10 years older than me. I know self discipline is hard for Nigerian men....

    • @giftfromabove2107
      @giftfromabove2107 Před 10 měsíci

      😂😂 are you a troll or just a bitter person?? Your bitter and negative comments are littered everywhere. Are you hungry or is it the time of the month? You need to chill.

  • @marciajackson1390
    @marciajackson1390 Před 9 měsíci +16

    The host does not represent our American Black Culture. She is acting like she is only trying to impress the Nigeria or Africa Culture. Who chose this woman??

    • @Sjbjo
      @Sjbjo Před 4 měsíci

      Behaviour wise she is far from being my cup of tea

    • @oladaposarumi3219
      @oladaposarumi3219 Před 4 měsíci

      She is neutral, she is exposed, I guess you're ignorant for your criticism, do you listen to African Americans rappers? Both male and female? Google their lyrics

  • @malissawhite4569
    @malissawhite4569 Před 10 měsíci +6

    Beloved, YOU can only speak for YOURSELF because I’m ONE WHO KNOWS WHO I AM!

  • @Olums12
    @Olums12 Před 9 měsíci +2

    Brilliant conversation. Good representation Adeniyi...Humility and respect we deserved frpm our women make Nigerian men work and spend on the family. Control with love!

  • @patricklee2659
    @patricklee2659 Před 5 měsíci +2

    I am a Nigerian living in Wisconsin and looking for a good AA to marry. These ladies are damn good. There are good and bad people everywhere. Am still open and searching!

  • @theancientvoice9272
    @theancientvoice9272 Před 10 měsíci +24

    As African, I always see American culture as predominantly African American culture. You have a culture, just like Carribeans have and so forth. And I will add to say, don't believe African cultures are safe from other influences, via Islam, Christianity, colonisation and so forth. But ultimately, I think we're all stuck with what is actually culture ? It's dynamic, it does change, mute, borrow to adapt. The Nigerian man in front of you, has a different culture from his ancestors few centuries ago, they would probably not identity with a lot things. For example religion. The same way you dislike the use of your culture in the American capitalistic environment, the same I dislike part of African cultures. The only difference is yours has a big zoom on it.

  • @UniqueBeautie
    @UniqueBeautie Před 10 měsíci +16

    Bullsh*t. One married me. An Igbo. He was so polite and loving at 1st. After the I Do's, he treated me like total Sh*t. I asked him what happened to the friendship and Love he has. Always showed me. He said, "You're my wife now!" 🤯😢💔 He Only wanted Papers. My blood line is Yoruba. All of my family and friends were like WHY did u marry him. They feel like the Igbos are the Worst! I personally don't believe it was his tribe. I belit. Was hiss personality.

    • @mahoganysoul7195
      @mahoganysoul7195 Před 8 měsíci

      It's personality, who he is .... At least that's what I think.

    • @user-di6dy1oz4s
      @user-di6dy1oz4s Před 7 měsíci

      There is always going to be a bad apple but Nigeria husband are very loving. I am a living witness. And if he won’t love me the way I wanted, I give him a love charm 😂😂😂😂 just kidding lol😂😂😂😂

    • @karinamoses790
      @karinamoses790 Před měsícem

      This happened to me but children were involved found out he had a wife for 9 years in Africa they were planning a baby whilst I had mine wretched

  • @uzoejekwumadu7731
    @uzoejekwumadu7731 Před 9 měsíci +1

    Enjoyed every second of it. Cross cultural understanding is very important 👏👏

  • @KaiserNabolaasidcreativeplus
    @KaiserNabolaasidcreativeplus Před 4 měsíci +1

    Hi Carly, I really enjoyed your conversation here. Interesting to hear your perspective on our African (Nigerian) men. This is your brother from the Cameroons.

    • @letstalkovercocktails
      @letstalkovercocktails  Před 4 měsíci +1

      Hi Kasier, Thank you I appreciate your message. Cameroon is on my list of places to visit! I have an immense amount of respect for the culture. 🫶🏽

    • @KaiserNabolaasidcreativeplus
      @KaiserNabolaasidcreativeplus Před 4 měsíci +1

      @@letstalkovercocktails You won't be disappointed. When you get there you will understand why Cameroon is called Africa in Miniature. Shout out to me if you need a hand. Stay blessed.

    • @letstalkovercocktails
      @letstalkovercocktails  Před 4 měsíci

      @@KaiserNabolaasidcreativeplus ♥️🙏🏽

  • @verdaylove
    @verdaylove Před 10 měsíci +20

    Nine minutes in. Loving the vibe and truly appreciative for this episode as I can telllll its a great conversation.
    I just must comment on the statement of African descendants/Indigenous Afro people in the USA not having any culture. Hear me out, sis

    • @verdaylove
      @verdaylove Před 10 měsíci

      ANTM**** not TS

    • @verdaylove
      @verdaylove Před 10 měsíci

      Anyway, subscribed

    • @verdaylove
      @verdaylove Před 10 měsíci

      And yes omg Afrobeats are sooooooo empowering and encouraging. Will make you KNOW YOUR WORTH and honor God OLUWA with our lives. Sis we can learn anything we put our minds too o

    • @letstalkovercocktails
      @letstalkovercocktails  Před 10 měsíci +5

      Definitely appreciate your comment. I absolutely love the references and can relate but culture as a whole… meaning everyone can’t identify with Jerking or Tyra- yes iconic lol!! When I speak of culture I think of clothes, fabrics, foods, language… traditions... not just recreational events or entertainment. Other cultures have those things. That’s what I mean… I wish we had more depth to us other than Sexy Red… etc. I love being AA… I would love for us to showcase more respectful traditions. Again, thank you for the comment and the support! 💕✨

    • @rebeccasmith1008
      @rebeccasmith1008 Před 10 měsíci +3

      I agree with @letstalkovercocktails much of the entertainment mentioned as being "culturally" African American is more recreational and not rooted in any traditional value. The only things I can think of that are structured and traditional are jumping the broom, sororities, some of our foods and HBCU's that's it. I think we have become extremely wayward and destructive as Americans to be honest.

  • @berryjewell3000
    @berryjewell3000 Před 10 měsíci +8

    Great honest and truthful conversation. American must protect the family name, image, and perception by disciplining their youth and hold family values. All foreigners view American

  • @Baddamozie
    @Baddamozie Před 3 měsíci

    This is the most intelligent conversation I've heard in recent times around the subject of Africa, African-American and Race in America. I am glad that you had a guest who is both educated and mature. I really love his interpretation of the word "Akata", which I as a Nigerian didn't even know. I'm not from one of the three major tribes from where most of the slangs come from. Growing up, I heard the word AKata, but it was attributed to the way our black brothers and sisters spoke. We attributed it to the loss of their native languages due to the effect of slavery. I never knew it was related to the Panther as an animal. I can see the raw connection between the untamed behavior of some of our cousins and that of an animal. Nevertheless, the lack of discipline in most Black households is a direct result of the immasculation of Black men by the slave masters. The slave masters enjoyed humiliating the men, black men in front of their wives. That practice had a humiliating on the psyche of black men, and I believe it triggered down over the years. That's going to take a long time to overcome. African Americans are also very hardworking by nature, but they stopped working as hard because of slavery, I don't blame them for that. With the new generation, I believe these shortcomings will be eradicated. I enjoyed this conversation a great deal. Good job, guys!

  • @emexokezie7796
    @emexokezie7796 Před měsícem +1

    Firstly, as a British born Nigerian, this is so endearingly beautiful to see... I'm an ambassador for the African - Caribbean - USA unity by action as regards interaction with our peoples everywhere.... That's my religion, not church. However, black Americans Do have a culture which is so infectious on the entire black race for the most part... The beauty of the music.. Especially real soul.. Listen to groups like CHANGE, BB&Q.... the Hip hop,... Stations like WBLS in New York,... Hot 97.....thats just music and entertainment alone we garnered out of the pain of the enemy of both of us.... The pain of exclusion.... There's the intelligence, inventions hidden from our own educational knowledge... No wonder Einstein was endeared to us... This constellation of our own self creative endeavour borne out of deliberate external denial from the other race is culture enough and is beyond reproach! Love to us all... 🥂

  • @doolittlefirstking6388
    @doolittlefirstking6388 Před 10 měsíci +17

    Its basically culture difference!!! As an african/ Nigerian woman, you dare not be rude to your MIL, call her by name or talk back at them! But its the norm in the states...
    Nigerian women marry the whole family not just the man!
    And their marriages are for better for worse, not dropping their husband at the first sight of trouble.

    • @nyaintunyaintu509
      @nyaintunyaintu509 Před 9 měsíci +3

      Exactly! Most Africans/Nigerian men date and marry African women… I’m just laughing at these comments

  • @LESSON118
    @LESSON118 Před 4 měsíci +1

    This discussion was mind blowing. I enjoyed learning how & why Nigerian men & women look at American men & women as they do. Knowledge is powerful. 🙂

    • @letstalkovercocktails
      @letstalkovercocktails  Před 4 měsíci

      Thank you! I appreciate you watching! I learned a lot from this episode as well. 🫶🏽

  • @chinneynz7861
    @chinneynz7861 Před 10 měsíci

    Beautiful conversation!!!!!

  • @LoveAlways1002
    @LoveAlways1002 Před 10 měsíci +11

    I'm laughing because I went to Nigeria for two weeks...... I would NEVERRRR date a Nigerian man.....not the ones I met over there & not the ones I've met over here 🙄😴 Oh but I loooooooove how they look in their outfits called a "Senator" ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
    🤯🤯Never knew AA women were infatuated with Nigerian men 🙄🙄😩 I must've missed that memo!!!!

    • @victorobi20
      @victorobi20 Před 10 měsíci +1

      Why did you go to Nigeria in the first place?

    • @LoveAlways1002
      @LoveAlways1002 Před 10 měsíci +1

      @@victorobi20 My friends wedding.

    • @alainalowe9507
      @alainalowe9507 Před 10 měsíci +1

      Me too!

    • @tishreni5183
      @tishreni5183 Před 10 měsíci

      Nigerian men are nice looking,but they're as different to Black Americans as night and day.

    • @Barbiette123
      @Barbiette123 Před 10 měsíci

      @LoveAlways1002 You are a wise woman...lol. Nigerian men are not worth the trouble, and are not particularly emotionally intelligent or humane - there are good ones, but its a gamble. In general, black men across the world seem to be underachievers AS A COLLECTIVE (Individually they might do well). I dont know why black women care/engage with topics like this. Allow these men keep talking and prancing like peacocks, while their counterparts in other races are conquering outer space....SMH

  • @adewaleolaseni8278
    @adewaleolaseni8278 Před 9 měsíci +5

    Nice interview! I like the emphasis on the fact that that the opinions are not applicable to all Afro Americans and Nigerians. What I do know is, many Nigerians do have it at the back of their minds that they're going to return back to Nigeria some day, but its usually difficult to find Afro Americans who wants to go all the way hence why you are not seeing a lot of marriages happening between the two. Regarding "knacking", this generation of nigerian women are very expressive too...and I'm talking about married women as well! Also, the cultural barriers are collapsing! There is a new breed of Nigerians who are not faced by the cultural difference! Regarding the word AKATA, it waa never intended as a derogatroy word. I think many Afro Americans are taking it out of context. The Afro americans were first called Akata in the 60s/70s! I'm talking about era of the black panther, when African Americans were leading the emancipation of black people all over the world. I still don't understand why it is now perceived as derogatory!

  • @africandiasporaroundtable-3657

    Great discussion... I just learned the term and definition "wild panther" from you... its too true. (Perhaps subconsciously) still trying to recapture and find our way back to our original African roots.

  • @alihandria
    @alihandria Před 4 dny +1

    It's so disrespectful to say blacks don't have culture when we're the ones who build this country. Majority of the inventions came from our ancestors. Thats apart of our history, the way we talk, walk and dress have been copied, and it doesn't matter if our ancestors was given straps to cook, they made soul food from it, seem to me that you're wanting to be accepted from a different culture so bad that you're willing to ignorantly put down the black race, Anybody that comes to the USA can see our culture, and yes hip-hop and r&b is a part of our culture also, weather you want to accept it or not.

  • @parishers6351
    @parishers6351 Před 10 měsíci +4

    My cousin is from Jamaica. He married this African American woman but realize very quickly that he has to clean and cook because she does nothing of that sort. He’s goes to work while she’s home. Il

  • @igomubishop2848
    @igomubishop2848 Před 9 měsíci +7

    While @Nosh gave the literal meaning of "Akata", he didn't quite explain in what context it is being applied to African American. First, Akata is also used to imply all Nigerians residing overseas, specifically Nigerians visiting Nigeria from any of the Western Countries and showing off a western vibe.
    Secondly, Akata as applied to African Americans is not derogatory in any sense. It simply means he/she is brother/sister born and raised in America, and not a naturalized migrant African residing in America.
    We see those black radio shows who got this so wrong, speculating that Nigerians think poorly of African Americans.
    If nothing, majority of Nigerians want to be like African Americans and will often emulate their lifestyles.
    It's 2023 and majority of Nigerians now calved a niche for themselves, a new lifestyle that's fast gaining worldwide acceptance. Check out Nigerian music, fashion and mannerisms. We good like that. Thanks Carly for this opportunity.

  • @nzemkwispam1697
    @nzemkwispam1697 Před 6 měsíci

    This is fun . Interesting analysis.

  • @anniejames3059
    @anniejames3059 Před 10 měsíci +8

    In Nigeria the men will provide for woman and the kids that is a Nigerian men upbringing

    • @tombimashri8149
      @tombimashri8149 Před 10 měsíci +6

      Yes but it comes at a price. The women nd children hv no voice they are under control nd hv to always be submissive for hubby Daddy's money

    • @heavensent197
      @heavensent197 Před 10 měsíci +2

      They kick you out of the house when they are done with you.

    • @tonirowe1975
      @tonirowe1975 Před 10 měsíci

      @@tombimashri8149atleast someone is being honest here ❤

    • @chinneynz7861
      @chinneynz7861 Před 10 měsíci

      Indeed!!!!

  • @stephenoyoko4143
    @stephenoyoko4143 Před 10 měsíci +5

    I am from Kenya and I live in Dallas, TX. Some years back I met a beautiful young AA woman from California., she had arrived in TX by way of Japan, we started liking each other, one evening I took her out to my favorite American restaurant. We had a good time and we’re there for about three hours. Eventually we had to leave and paid for the tab with a credit card and tipped the wait cash. Man all hell broke loose, what the hell did I tip the waitress for. Long story short, that was the end of it.

    • @sisterkamilah4373
      @sisterkamilah4373 Před 10 měsíci +3

      Tipping is very normal. Some women are too insecure. She wasn’t a good one obviously but not all are like that.

    • @stellacheptanui5690
      @stellacheptanui5690 Před 10 měsíci

      Pole boss next time come to UK😰

    • @irenegaruba48
      @irenegaruba48 Před 9 měsíci +1

      Too much jealousy and unfamiliarity with generosity.

  • @orimidaraolusola569
    @orimidaraolusola569 Před 10 měsíci +7

    I know this AA parents that come over to their daughter's live in boyfriend's home regularly to spend the weekend,my mother, the mum of the boyfriend was shocked to the marrow! No Nigerian parent will stay over in the guy's house until he's married their daughter

  • @theblessedblackwoman
    @theblessedblackwoman Před 10 měsíci

    I actually enjoyed this interview. You have a good platform to grow your channel. My only criticim is to drop the drinks or have a table to rest it on because i was distracted, hoping you dont spill your drink. It doesn't really add to your already fine aesthetic.

  • @vicbersong
    @vicbersong Před 9 měsíci

    Great interview. Nice host, well done Niyi

  • @DJMIKEONZ
    @DJMIKEONZ Před 10 měsíci +3

    The one question ive been trying to get answered is this.. why do some African American women refer to themselves as 'BITCH' ... yet absolutely want to be 'Respected' ? Why not a different more respect worthy, positive nametag. Just wondering.

  • @sabrinawhiteman3396
    @sabrinawhiteman3396 Před 10 měsíci +4

    Yeah, well be alright. There are plenty of men in the diaspora who want us. We aren't losing any sleep over this confused person. 😅

  • @lolam751
    @lolam751 Před 4 měsíci +1

    As a Nigerian woman, I really enjoyed this interview. I would love to see African Americans marry Nigerians/Africans and have their children learn more about African culture. This will enable us close the divide and resolve some underlying negative issues prevailent in the African American communtity. Just as Nigerians have a lot of love to give African Americans, we need all the love in marriage, in friendship, in business from African Americans.
    I love the host for those tough questions and NOSH's honest answers.

    • @letstalkovercocktails
      @letstalkovercocktails  Před 4 měsíci +1

      Thank you so much! As an African American woman I absolutely love the culture as many people of African descent have become family to me. The more we know… the more we grow! 🫶🏽

    • @lolam751
      @lolam751 Před 4 měsíci

      @@letstalkovercocktails Absolutely sis!

  • @gordo4624
    @gordo4624 Před 10 měsíci +6

    I loved every bit of this conversation. keep it up guys.

  • @jjw1997
    @jjw1997 Před 10 měsíci +4

    🙄 really who is running after Nigerian men?😂 Please stop.

  • @hihih8633
    @hihih8633 Před 4 měsíci +1

    we are more similar than we are different. Nigerians are amazing and I love the good and bad about my culture. I used to be judgmental, some of us grow up with better role models, those who do should lift others up and have compassion. I love the new Nigerian culture. They are beautiful, cultured and Americanized, they will change the world. Let's unite! God bless....

  • @user-li7gv2hv7k
    @user-li7gv2hv7k Před 8 měsíci +2

    Victim of the stereotype is so true 😢😔praying for all the Native American people who are not wild panthers but instead indigenous people to this land🙏🏽 and for the African American people that were sold brought here from Africa I pray for you too and hope that one day together the native indigenous American Indian’s and the African American people one day come together to heal from the trauma of what our ancestors went through along with the suffering and that we overcome any obstacles that may come so that we can finally be happy again and not stereotyped to ourselves because it does not matter anymore what others think of us anymore, it matters what we think of ourselves and how well we do and overcome because as far as it’s kept it was the Africans who sold us off to the American pagan, ways. They sold there own african people to America this is why african American people today are wild so that makes the African indigenous people accountable as well for this, they are essentially considered wild panthers and are simply looking at themselves when they see african Americans the way they are today and tomorrow and so they are not looking at the world instead only themselves.

  • @orimidaraolusola569
    @orimidaraolusola569 Před 10 měsíci +4

    He's very right about AA women not welcoming the husband or even boyfriend's family. You're practically banned😢

  • @EricaBeee
    @EricaBeee Před 8 měsíci +3

    Her questions are asked very suggestive as well.

  • @akinakinsiku6818
    @akinakinsiku6818 Před 9 měsíci +2

    African Americans do have a culture. I think it is disapointing that this narrative exists. Its takes for granted that Black Culture is pretty much African American Culture.

  • @patrickpedro6458
    @patrickpedro6458 Před 10 měsíci +1

    So you are my sister from Benin City Edo state, love you sister ❤Nigeria 🇳🇬

  • @stephenanderson1594
    @stephenanderson1594 Před 10 měsíci +3

    Porsha Williams-Guobadia is married to a Nigerian and happy. Bachelorette Charity Lawson choose Dotun Olubeko and they are happy. STOP the African vs African American divide it doesn't benefit neither one of us.

  • @chefboyab
    @chefboyab Před 11 měsíci +6

    If your already creating your own world then live in it by yourself.. I felt that 💯