Why There’s So Much Conflict at Work and What You Can Do to Fix It | Liz Kislik | TEDxBaylorSchool
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- čas přidán 12. 06. 2024
- We usually think of conflict as something that happens between people, so when there's conflict at work, we tend to blame the people involved, and expect them to straighten things out. But people are just the part of the story that's easiest to see, according to Liz Kislik, a management consultant and business coach. Liz draws on examples from more than 25 years of working with clients from the Fortune 500 to national nonprofits and family-run businesses such as American Express, The Girl Scouts, and Highlights for Children. She describes the underlying conditions that can lock people into unproductive conflict, and shares five steps to enable people in any kind of organization identify the underpinnings of a conflict and work through it effectively. Liz's focus is on helping organizations solve their thorniest problems while strengthening their top and bottom lines. She writes for Harvard Business Review and for the dedicated readers of her "Workplace Wisdom" blog and has taught at Hofstra University and NYU. You can learn more at lizkislik.com.
oh my God, conflicts happen bc of people. I have worked from home bc of this virus, i have never been so happy.
LOL .fantastic .... and exactly ...
Very good.
I have worked from home, and even the virtual work environment SUCKED.
My exact thoughts. We’re all so different that it stresses me out sooooo much! I work at a fast food restaurant and just accepted a work from home offer and have never been so excited and relieved to get away from people and ONLY be around Family
Same 👋 Life is so peaceful working from home!
I show this talk to my students in Workplace Dispute Resolution. The ability which Liz has to clearly explain difficult points with humour and compassion is incredibly powerful in the learning environment
Excellent presentation! I'll use these 5 steps to help resolve a conflict this week!
This was an incredibly strong talk. I really needed to hear this. Thank you!
Great talk. I hope more people begin to approach conflict this way.
So wise to get underneath conflict or we will continue to perpetuate misunderstanding and further conflict that gets in the way of productive, enjoyable work environments. Great talk!
Unfortunately, it is because of people. Usually just a few... Managers with little to no experience concerning the work they "manage".
I am very grateful to this speaker thought to address bullying and corporate incompetence! Other TED talks on the same subject completely dismiss this idea!
Clear, Concise and Insightful. Thank you!!
Spot on! So glad to stumble on this one.
Thank you so much for this. So enlightening. ♥ ♥ ♥
This was an excellent talk! Relevant and actionable.
Wow, that was just terrific. I also teach conflict resolution. And still I found great gems and a really powerful construct. Thank you, Liz.
Simply perfect
This is seriously one of the most helpful relatable talks. I needed this!
Thank you for sharing your knowledge, Liz. So many pieces of the puzzle to consider in the aim for better relationships and communication in the workplace.
sorry to be off topic but does someone know of a tool to log back into an Instagram account??
I somehow lost the password. I would love any assistance you can give me!
@Kelvin Jameson instablaster ;)
@@kelvinjameson3764 doesn’t it have the option “forgot your password”? I don’t use instagram anymore but there should be an option like that just click on it and it will ask for the email you used for the account and they’ll send you a link to make a new password for your account
Office Conflict - not an easy topic to address but Liz Kislik held the audience’s attention throughout her well-organized presentation by employing an exceptionally well-prepared combination of human touch and truly useful information. You knew she was speaking with both kindness and true knowledge…and you wanted to hear more.
Magnificent wonderful superb great teaching
5 Steps To Get Traction on Persistent Conflict: 1. Rule, screen or deal with that 1 person who is the source of conflict. 2. Ask the right people the right questions. 3. Align around goals and means. 4. Find allies at all levels. 5. Teach new habits for managing differences. (My feedback) Thank you.
Lraschell Morton thank you I was going to look up te transcript lol
Steps 6 - Sometimes something needs to be said and done even if it's too uncomfortable.
Thank you
No sé quién eres pero te amo.
Im still completely confused. What questions are we supposed to ask? why does it seem like shes only giving advice to employers instead of employees
Good session on conflict management, thank you.
Beautiful amazing impressive brilliant talk. Thank you, bless you. All your dreams come true.
Very informative information this I needed I have truly been threw alot with upper management and couldn't understand the why ....now I get it
Brilliant talk
social competition can be a major ringleader in this.
Very helpful thanks 🙏
Brilliant. Helped me so much.
Thank you
This is so on point
Where there's no communication, there's conflict
Well said
Well, no communication, yes, but poor and faulty lying communicating aka gossiping and gaslighting? Yes.
Then workplace violence happens. I know of a story where a worker had conflict with two others, he left, came back with a baseball bat and bashed their skulls in. Both of them dead. Be careful how you treat others at work.
Deep!
Do you meant " Where there's communication, there's bound to be conflict?"
Very helpful
I enjoyed this video, I understand more about and how to deal with conflict.
chuck us some answers
Brilliant.
Wow! This was very helpful.
My conflicts have been due to abusive employees that were tolerated by my employers. My guess is that the employers feared retaliation if they fired these abusive people.
so insightful
I have experienced exactly the same.
One of the biggest legal risks you can take in America is hiring someone. The root cause of the cowardly behavior is the code of regulations that opens you up to frivolous lawsuits that will actually win (or win a settlement). As an indication of this, consider that an employee can quit for any reason but an employer can't fire for any reason.
Well you either keep the bad people and you loose the good ones or you do the opposite….
I agreed. What my company is doing.
My work place is full of this. But you voice your opinion you've had it
Wow she is amazing.
I love what Mrs. Kislik had to say. I strongly agree with her five-step evaluation and her ‘Lizard listening’ technique. My father was very passionate about educating me on professional communication, as I grew up. 👌🏽
Thank you very much for your humanitarian speech 🌹
Thanks
Love this. But what happens when the conflict is caused by the incompetent bully?
Her voice is kind of soothing lol.
and dry. Get this lady some water!
Asmr
I can hear the saliva in her mouth
@@flavioa6351 lol! 😂😂😂
Great talk
It's so hard to get results to conflict to resolved because if the leadership doesn't follow through to their words. And just sweep employees conflict under the rug. I am dealing with that as speak and other employees. We just shut down and stopped speaking. For what if you have a leadership that just listen one ear and out the other. They have no plans to solve conflict so it continues.
We need to take care of each other.
Nice
Really great talk!
I agree with my brother...he worked in retail for 17 years....he said "every customer thinks they are right"...same in work place....everyone thinks "they are right"....
In general every human thinks the same isn't ?
4:21 steps begin
Your voice is SO calming. What a wonderful voice. I am very curious what is on the elephant cards. Are those the questions you asked?
I think she means the questions that expose the elephant in the room...those uncomfortable truths.
I'm here caz of my assignment
rachel mulonda Interpersonal Communications?
@@makiahalmendariz4093 it was personal professional
Same 😂😩
@@makiahalmendariz4093 I am in interpersonal communications are you enrolled at ctu
Kashaka Conrod Yes, I am.
This makes me think of the conflicts that happen between races in America.
So many people argue surface topics and present moment situations but no matter how " reasonable" it looks like someone is being the situation where some groups control resources to their advantage while leaving other groups out is still there hiding underneath and it causes resentment that is festering under every surface subject.
So even if someone wins in a discussion they are still relegated to a lesser position in life so even if you win you lose.
People still feel dissatisfied, even after a surface conflict is resolved.They don't even know exactly why they are still angry, feel bad about themselves and confused about really addressing the underlying real issues.
It just feels too big to tackle and too painful and scary to acknowledge.
Humility
The policy governing the operating model, decides what should be done when conflicts arise. Now imagine that the local policymakers themselves are into the mode of promoting ''dysfunctional'' people. If that doesn't sound bad enough, then the cherry on pie is the misinterpretation of conflict resolution itself, where dysfunctional leaders promote dysfunctional juniors to keep genuine people away from stepping into the right role. Branding dysfunctional is something which goes beyond identifying an incompetent person, but its actually more than that. Its about how the promoting leader wants to retain higher stakes among themselves and promote ''pets'' not talent.
Samrat Hore you just described my work environment. Actually the toxic environment is created by the leaders not the subordinates. Favoritism all over the place, showcase his favorite people with nothing to offer to the agency but ignorance
Even the incompetent employee is not easy to resolve. I never see people say themselves are incompetent. Even worse, the manager of that employee will not agree because he did the hiring
Wrong hire is a tag used for such people :)
Many employers do nothing when there is conflict. They are slow to reprimand productive/"essential" employees even if these employees are bullies...
The pop rocks 😂
Put video at 1.25 :P
That why rude is created, it is amazing treatments /strategy to deal with /for those who their mothers forgat to teach them politness .iam So good and so bad just push the bottons to get your order other wise i got nill for no body and cant wait for any to start it with me , every action got a reaction, lol even physics agrees with me.
What are these elephant cards? I want to try
I swear this is the lady that does the audio books..
So is this something I can implement myself as a social worker when I have issues with other people in my team, or do I need a councelor like her to do that?
Only high level executives and managers get this training. It doesn't trickle down to the employees working on the front lines.
So true never brought to us. What is brought to us is get those number hustles the front line employee.
She's seems to legitimately want to help, but companies create these situations, sometimes unwittingly, but let them continue. Almost like 'let the best man/woman win', like gladiators.
Manipulative snakes charm bosses to get hired and are frauds who have no background to do the job, then get everyone around them to dance to their tune. Those that don't dance are forced out.
@kkm312 So true. It seems that a lot of companies hire incompetents as managers and you can't talk to incompetents.
Exactly what my company is going. Well said
Maybe there is a contradiction between step 1 and what she said before, about not focusing on people, but on structures. No?
How to manage a conflict: bring a beer to the table 🍺
The 5 steps your professor asked to identify:
1. We need to rule out the unfortunate possibility that a single dysfunctional individual is actually the source of conflict.
2. Asking the right people the right questions
3. Making sure that everyone is aligned.
4. Find allies at all levels in the organization to help you implement the change
5. Teach new habits for managing differences.
You’re welcome. Now, go write that essay you lazy head...
u are the best
Thank you for your efforts.
You must be the UN representative to Libya . You are the right person to safe the community of 5 million helpless people . I 💚 you .
It sounds great talk but people with this mindset are the one makes the conflict even worst!
I'd love it if it had spanish subtitles available to share it with some colleagues
😢😮
Bullies don't know what they are doing? Wise up lady
I am ready, to quit, i have found a job, where no one, looks over your shoulder
Deborah Rowland good for you that only exists when own your own company good luck with that
hey bud, good on you, but if, i, may, i think you, use too many, commas
Great, Deborah! I hope such a job exists. Please let me know if your present job is like that, where no one checks on you constantly.
@@ericgreen2325 lol so true. No companies isn't going to watch him like a hawk.
Yea we have to one day realize that their are bad people! And their mischievous behavior does not stop at work!
Conflict at my work continue because Human Resource and my union are useless.
I agree with everything said but the additional the “why” question. It is my opinion “why”questions invoke judgment. And judgment is usually never uplifts. S.R. Ridley, A Nurse You Can Trust! Î
@Truth Hour: I am curious about your opinion “why”questions invoke judgment".
What makes you say that?
@@doannhan3552 The nature of “why” questions places people on the defense. When the defensive mode Activate it can camouflage the truth
In Step 1 Dysfunctional employees should include narcissists
Yes!
Narcissists run around looking to cause trouble everywhere they go.
They create chaos and thrive on it.
Gray-rock.
Exactly 😂
Quiet, non-assertive, introverted, conflict-averse, hardworking, meek, apolitical, private employees = dysfunctional.
Extroverted, assertive, conflict prone, competitive, political, charming, go-getters, dominant, talkers = functional.
It's all a matter of perception and the culture you live in.
In my company they need communication training anger Management training and people skill training then my company would be great.
If a person is not willing to change his/her attitude not any single training will solve the issue. My boss got plenty of trainings and he is still very rude to his employees. In my opinion you need to evaluate yourself, understand your mistakes and then things will work out
I agree with previous posting...."abusive employees tolerated by my employers"....employers falsely see these abusers as "leaders"....hahhaha...haaaaa...haaaaaa
Definitely the truth.
Interesting talk. There are exceptions to these steps though. If the organization is going through rounds of workforce reductions or if the individuals interviewed are conformist focused on their own survival you will never hear an accurate assessment. There's conflict of interest. There's too much interpersonal inter-dynamic enmeshment present to really see the whole picture. I have seen countless examples of bullies keeping their jobs due to management being in denial of their manipulation and goals to "succeed" no matter the cost to others. Executive coaches, HR, management or the workers need to be well trained in psycho-dynamics, have good self-awareness as well as full awareness and understanding of others in order to make decisions that lead to constructive, fair, ethical resolution and growth for all.
I'm confused, it sounds like she is giving advice to employers on how to pair their employees together rather than telling the employees how to solve a problem with their coworker.
Who else is here for school work?
lack of structure...is my opinion of why there is so much dysfunction....lack of "unified" way of doing something...companies are so overly diverse now that there is no unified way of doing things....every different culture feels "their way is best"....
So true.
Everybody stays for money
My work place makes policy to work on but then who work exactly on policy or try to be as close as possible to those policies ,are the most bullied by those who don't work on that policy in combination with those who made policy . 😂😂😂😂😂So sincere , punctual,truthful and honest people get bullied by the liars ( supported by policy makers ) By chance policy makers and those ignoring it belong to the same nation and work against their own Nation's benefit by bullying foreigner who try to work sincerely in foreign land to help that society 😂
The lip smacking and noises is amrs and giving me anxiety
OMG what are all those lips noises about? 😖
@@mikkinicholas7536 🤣
Seriously though.. ughhhhh
I had to watch it again for school and I'm cringing
@@adjustthycrownministries1141 sad
@@rubystone493 trolling much
Is she here to sell her book or work?
Dear sound person, I had to quit listening halfway through because I can’t abide hearing her mouth open and close.
OMG! you also noticed that LOL! 😂
lizard brain?? Was there an iguana in the room?
a 15 minute video explaining why adults need to and should act like they are in fact adults. -_-
Come to my organization,
NOT THAT DEEP !
Very clear, coherent, but smth should be done about those mouth sounds, sorry. Very distracting
Who here because they have to do this for class and who here on their on accord with the show of hands I wouldn’t be here on my own smh who goes out and pays to see this I guess I am she going by the text book experience not on her own experience they need real people real experience just saying
Facing a bully
Talks about annoying people getting thre stuff together but she cant go more two sentences without going tsk
Meh.
Group of people can lie!!! And that’s what your talk is not effective
,
@@UnionPlatformIndia9188 Yes that is right groups of people can lie
I can't with her mouth noises. Makes it hard for me to watch sadly.
That is the most erroneously incorrect statement I've ever ever heard bullies know exactly the pain the pain they inflict upon others!
Another pointless video I'm forced to watch for my job
I am sorry “ancient lizard brain..” lost any and all respect I had at that point, wow sorry that crazy talk lost me.
That's what they call the limbic system. It's a real thing.