Fix Your Marriage: The Do's & Don'ts
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- čas přidán 5. 07. 2024
- You desperately want to know how to save your marriage...but you have NO answers. You feel helpless and frustrated. The pain doesn’t subside- it consumes your mind and shatters your heart into pieces. You ask, “Is it even possible to fix my marriage?”
You don’t know how the person you loved, who once loved you, now treats you as an enemy.. Your spouse may repeatedly say “I’m done, it’s over,” or even, “You’re making it worse when you try to do anything to save our marriage.” You long for a sign..
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Should you give up? No. Is there a magic solution, a “quick-fix” or “simple phrase” that will save your marriage? No. But there are specific things you should do (and should NOT to if you want to save your marriage.)
Here’s what won’t work:
Giving up too soon- Marriage Helper works with marriages where EVERYONE ELSE said it was “hopeless” and we’ve seen those “hopeless” marriages saved.
Clinging & Begging- While human compassion moves a person to help someone in pain, it backfires if the pain is caused by them and they have no intention of stopping the action that causes that pain.
Allowing yourself to be manipulated- it’s not beneficial to give in to your spouse’s demands thinking that doing so will bring them back. Rather, it allows them to do what they want to with the least amount of resistance.
Here’s what will work:
Hanging in there a little longer...and doing the right things- It’s very common. Most people give up TOO SOON. We get it, we don’t blame people for reaching a point of pain where they do not want to continue fighting for their marriage.
Work on the PIES of Attraction- Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, and Spiritual. Being the best “you” that you can be physically for your age & situation in life. Having engaging, intellectual conversations with your spouse NOT about your marriage. Evoking positive emotions your spouse enjoys feeling. Holding true to your beliefs and values.
Be as understanding & accepting as you can be- Can you accept what your spouse feels without arguing? If so that’s a great start to develop a relationship once again. It is a very tough thing to do; it requires amazing strength. But we have seen this inner strength bring a spouse back time and time again.
Be willing to forgive & learn to love again- this is a process.
So, what can you do? Lean on HOPE! Thousands of people have saved their marriage from dire circumstances, all because hope propelled them to do the right things. We see this every other week at our Workshops. Give us a call if you’d like to learn more!
Thank you for watching!
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Learn How To Get Your Spouse Back with our FREE Mini Course Here:
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Hoping this will help bring my family back together...
Im praying for everyone in this situation cause its hurt i feel it 💔 everyday. Stay strong.
Thank you 🙏
I’m not giving up on my marriage but I can’t say it hasn’t crossed my mind daily. I’m going to hang in there and work on my P.I.E.S.
___
Never give up bro
___
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bro don't give up. I'm in the same boat can I think about quitting too. But we're men. We can't quit.
God said, Let no man separate with He has joined together...It's God's will that all marriages stay together.....Prayer changes things...God still works miracles....He created marriage and He can save your marriage
NOT, God need to work on trying to save trump from starting a war that could bring our earth as we know to extension. He has already started a genocide on the Southern boarders. I think that should be his priority.
@@katherineheimnick5340 What does Trump have to do with marriage????
Bob's Place agreed on that
@@senioramarie5399 Thank you...Merry Christmas
@@BobE316 How i wish to have a Merry Christmas but anywYs, thNks a lot...Merry Christmas too😊
Good video, I think it is even harder when the person who wants out does not say they want out but their disconnect from the relationship speaks loudly.
Absolutely!
So true! Going through that now and it's much tougher than before, when she would lash out in anger than she wanted to divorce
As a Christian man, I have found your channel extremely insightful. Very well thought out . I look forward to restoring my marriage.
Too bad they don’t incorporate biblical aspects
I pray that God restores not just my marriage but everyone reading it
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When the second person doesn't want to change, you will never fix marriage altough you do everything for it. So true video
@@kunlesalako2486 he do it for money?
I am at a point where I don't have any more time to wait. I don't have the ability to push down the hurt and loneliness anymore. I have lived with this for 10 years. She isn't interested in counseling, she isn't interested in changing, we have reached a point where I can't go on the way it is working.
Wish more young people listen to this. This is gold. Thank you.
Feels like I'm in a bad dream every now and then. We are separated and after 9 months I still miss her. I have worked on my PIES the moment I found Marriage Helper. You have kept me going all this time. The PIES do work and I even advise doing them when things are good in the marriage. We do see each other on occasion. Unfortunately, I have to work on my listening skills (with understanding, empathy, non-defensive, full attention, and attune). I failed but recognized what I did wrong. Hopefully, there will be another chance for me. Intellectual development has been very helpful here. There are some great books from John Gottman and Gary Chapman.
First step is indeed to build back the relationship and trust, the emotional connection before anything can move to some sort of reconciliation. It's a marathon and not a race. I do want to give up at times because that is easy. But I know that skills like listening are work and I haven't mastered it yet. That gives me hope again that I haven't tried everything yet and so I am still standing for the marriage.
Hove god
Excellent Video clip! Forgive me for the intrusion, I would love your opinion. Have you tried - Mahorrla Guard Marriage Method (should be on google have a look)? It is a great exclusive product for Saving Your Marriage without the normal expense. Ive heard some amazing things about it and my good mate called Gray after a lifetime of fighting got cool success with it.
It doesn't matter how much I want it; it's not in my power. Only God can save my marriage and break through to her heart of stone.
Hey David M, so sorry to hear you are going through this. Because of the complexity of this situation, we would strongly advise you reach out to us directly! You can call us at 1 (866) 903 0990 and be connected with one of our Client Representatives who will guide you to the best resources we have available for your situation. You can also schedule the call yourself for a time that works best for you by following this link: marriagehelper.com/marriage-strategy-call/
We look forward to speaking with you directly if you will allow it!
Thank you so much marriage helper I use every video you have as my guide to fixed my marriage and to fix me and it works my husband came back and restored our marriage..
That's amazing! I'm so happy for you! hope my wife and I can work through this, she has an emotional relationship with another man, she says she wants to work things out. I have a gut feeling she is just going to leave me and I will loose my best friend first and my wife second. I really don't know what to do besides be patient, respectful and not try and control her. Any advice?
I will apply it soon I hope it work
here's several suggestions for making improvements in your marriage
Try to discuss more
Help each other out more
Try to give and take more
(I discovered these and why they work from Pavs Partner Pundit site )
Kudos for the Video! Apologies for chiming in, I am interested in your opinion. Have you researched - Mahorrla Guard Marriage Method (should be on google have a look)? It is a smashing one off guide for Saving Your Marriage without the normal expense. Ive heard some super things about it and my cousin at last got astronomical results with it.
Great Video! Sorry for chiming in, I would love your initial thoughts. Have you thought about - Mahorrla Guard Marriage Method (google it)? It is a great one off product for Saving Your Marriage without the headache. Ive heard some incredible things about it and my old buddy Taylor finally got cool success with it.
I’m struggling to hide the pain of his affair, I suffer with low self esteem and this feels like I’m nearly at the point of a full break down
___
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So sorry to hear that
As always, thank you for posting.
Very encouraging! Thank you for your videos. I feel like there is hope!
My marriage is going through a tough time, my husband wants a divorce and am expecting our second. I hope these videos will help me 😭😭
Update?
I want my marriage to save, my spouse send me divorce mail, I begged him to give me one last chance but he said no, I’m praying and ask god to restore my marriage ty
What is this number about?
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Well said ! Thanks, like it. Already a subscriber since. God bless!
This gives me hope. I am going through this right now. Husband wants out but I don’t-a lot of people tell me I need to accept it and let him out but I don’t want that. I want to heal my marriage. I’ll be honest the part of working on myself is the hardest part. Sort of feel like w social media and other women out there I am being compared to them but I am going to give it my all because I love my husband and want not only to save my marriage but get back that passion we had when we got married at the young age of 20 and 22
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Thank you so much .. I am actually crying while watching your video. But you gave me hope right now I wanted to hug my husband ..
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@@roseelizabeth2679 thank you so much miss rose Elizabeth
I’m glad I found your videos. It may be the start!
What's Appi
Don't talk about relationship problems with spouse ...
Topics that bring positive talks. .
Be best you spiritual
-Be accepting and understanding of spouse.
Be their best friend.
-willing to forgive and learn to love again.
But what if source needs to change? Be more accepting or attentive etc and they won't?
You are by far the best. Grounded, good straight forward advice. I'm hooked on your posts and sharing with others. You are a fresh breathe. Most gurus are hacks making lots of money writing books and saying and giving outrageous advice (E. Perlman, one example).
Congratulations Kimberely Holmes.. well done ..excellent advice.
I was on board with everything you said until the part where he doesn't want to go back to his lover . If a lover is involved, sorry I'm out ! I'd never trust him again .
We understand Angie! That is 100% your choice. It's our goal to help people find ways to save the marriage if their goal is to stand! But we will never tell you what to do!
This is so me right now. How can my husband once deeply in love with me, acts like I don’t matter anymore😭 Working on my PIES although sometimes i just wanna give up. But i believed in Marriage and the vowed we once promise infront of God.
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Hey, I can refer you to someone who helped me got my lover back, He’s the best when it’s come to returning relationship back line
@@bosedeolorunfemi1543 I need your help right now. How can I contact you?
Acceptance is key! It’s a truism that the older we get, the more set in our ways we become. Trying to change one’s spouse is frustrating for both, to say the least
I needed this so badly
I am holding on my marriage for years now, it's my faith in God and love for my two kids that keeps me going... hoping you can be of help to bring my family back...not only my husband
there is still, hope, use law of attraction in bio
Excellent. Thank you.
I pray that it will be better.
Great videos. Thanks.
I have so much hope 🙏
So true the number 3 of the to do!!!
Totally get. My wife pretty much disconnected spiritually, emotionally and physically these past 7 years. I started wrong with the needy/clingy approach and now am just totally disconnected myself. She asked for me to step back and let her pursue me. Been trying to patiently wait for years now as it hasn't happened.
Thank you it is helpful
My wife...mid life crisis...nothing can be done. I’m tired trying
Hello, something can be done if you are actually ready to fix your marriage.
When my husband left me,I did everything possible to bring him back to me..
___
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Thanks. Great video.
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These is so nice after see these video my mind changed i bleave on hope
Good
I’m crying it’s so true
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Going through it right now
Thank you
Great videos.
I'm seventy ..I have been married three times. . it's a long stupid story ...
But I had thought that my third marriage was going to be fine ..I loved him , and I knew he could be quiet sometimes , and seemed sad , at times , I always wanted to make him happy !
But the day We married , Just a few short hours after ..,As he sat in our living room , with his best friend. Hey spoke about a news story , and they has different views on the story ..as I listened at the sink washing dinner dishes ,
I thought about the story as well , and turned to say .. " you know ,I think ......" As I got to the word " think " , my newly wed husband was up off the couch , knocking me onto the floor , pinning me down hard , with my arms pulled behind me , and he pulled one thumb back like he would have just as soon BREAK it !! He screamed in my ear , " TAKE IT BACK ! TAKE IT BACK !!!" ..I has nothing to " take back " , because I hadn't even got a chance to finish what I was thinking!!?
I met my third husband that day !! It never has gotten better !!
You need to get OUT!!!!! No one is ok with abuse.
I hope you aren't still with him sounds to me like he is crazy. Oh they can be so sweet until you say I do then you start to see the real person that they are. There is not enough LOVE in the whole world for me to let someone treat me like that. A lot of times a man will attach them selves to a woman that they know is lonely and wants companionship just to have some body to take care of them cook clean do their laundry essentially be a maid for them. Don't live your golden years being treated badly leave him or kick him out.
It was like the beginning of this video was describing me!
Nice!
I loved your video. i have watch it over and over
I know of a man who could help you restore back your relationship either your ex or soulmate
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Thank you The Solution Temple for bringing back my ex lover.
My wife needs to watch this video. But she's not interested. How do I convince her to watch it?
god bless you
Crystal clear
I need that hope now!
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Me too
It is always darkest before dawn
It’s simple. Just do whatever she says to do, whatever she wants. FTS.
What should I Do When She Don’t even want to Listen My Voice. The Moment she see My Name she got Crazy, She is Just Asking for Money and Property. I Am Still hoping for Some Sunshine and Miracle to Happen in Our Long Distance Marriage.
This is very helpfil
Hello calluna,
I can help you heal your relationship and make everything alright again with abundance of for you and your partner
I packed my grip and lift took my broken heart with me now she texting me calling me standing on my step want us to get help.don't think so. D_day hurt to bad
Hope
My wife is not giving me another chance, told me she left me cause she didnt feel like i was her priority felt like i was second to everything else. Said she thinks i used sex to try and mend the relationship and didnt make anything better. The first part is mostly true but sex i was using to try and have a baby with her. She does not want to try and fix things, she filed for divorce on the 18th of december, does not want to try and start over. She told me that once the love is gone it is hard to get back, she told me too little too late and that she loves me but not in love with me
Good job.
My dear if you seriously want to recover our relationship/get ex back or a specific person.
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I love these videos ❤ thank u so much
I hope for any sign even tho the victim like it’s all my fault 🤦🏽♂️
I don’t know why y’all do what what but……. Thank You😔, with all my heart.
Don't give up on life and the universe.... I know of a great man who helped me fix my broken heartbeat relationship and everything was restored to normal in days without delay..
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To whom it may be concern I can recommend you to someone that helped me get my ex back
Whtspp him
What if he won't even answer the phone or ignores your efforts to communicate. And how can they be attracted to your best self when they dont even see you or talk to you anymore?
Kathy Kobos that’s a tough situation. I only know that as a man I would say that it really doesn’t/shouldn’t matter IF you are working on your pies. Working on your pies will inevitably make you very attractive to either him or whomever in the future. If nothing else you will be able to find satisfaction in your life without the stress and worry about what he is doing or where he is. You can’t control that. If he has completely shut you off then he will go through what he has to go through on his own or with whomever and at some point he may begin to realize what he gave up. All I’m trying to say is the only thing you can control is what you do and who you become moving forward. I hope this helps.
@@jameslichtenberger9789 this comment is helpful for me, myhusband pasif, and I so hurt by his behavior. I will start try to do pies for my piece. Thanks alot!
Hello
Hey
Oh, my wife
I still love him. Divorced for over 1 year.
I feel like that and made all those mistakes..so hurtful..
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I'm not giving up, i just pray i don't go through this for a decade.
I know exactly what you're saying, but that's no way to live.....for either side.
@@Adam-hs4de Tell me about it! She's "happy" with the other man and I'm here suffering.
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Wow. This is exactly what I m going through right now
There are many factors in improving your partnership. One place I discovered which successfully combines these is the Mirykal Marriage Plan (check it out on google) without a doubt the most helpful guide that I've heard of. look at the amazing info .
There are several components to saving your partnership. One resource I discovered that succeeds in merging these is the Pavs Partner Pundit (google it if you're interested) without a doubt the most helpful plan that I've seen. Check out the super info .
Excellent video content! Excuse me for butting in, I would love your opinion. Have you tried - Taparton Saving Family Takeover (do a search on google)? It is an awesome one of a kind product for helping a troubled marriage without the headache. Ive heard some extraordinary things about it and my m8 finally got cool success with it.
I m in a toxic marriage. Never good enough, and she never see any good in me. She brags about this person doing this and that, and I do same or even better. If not for kids, I would have left years ago.
I saw text where she talked shit about my mother, SIL, and on my dads death bed, she goes down to hospital coffee shop to get on Facebook.
Some marriage is not worth saving bc they simply don’t love you. My wife stays with me bc her income is not enough to get an apartment in our area.
But I am making my exit place now, and so should you if your in my situation
I wanna do this but he wants to try with me while talking to her, how I work if I have no peace?
I've been married 13 years. There is no affairs involved. I know I have faults. We have started to butt heads over politics. I actually like that she has a different opinions than me, but she seems to devalue my opinions. With how things are these days I feel like I can't talk to her. We got into a nasty fight. I said it was like I lost her to a cult, she called me an incel. I packed a bag and left the next morning. We have 3 kids. Honestly, I love my wife and don't want to give her up, but everytime we have "the yearly fight" she starts talking divorce. It's hard to keep going when it feels like they already quit.
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Maybe because you always come back too soon ?
My marriage is the sound of one hand clapping.
😔
5:53
Goes to make a pie.
I’m suffering.. I don’t know what to do anymore.. my partner is having a affair
Mine is having an affair also, it is so hurtful. The lying is so much. I don’t know if he ever tells the truth.
Around 9:55, Kimberly mentioned how a wife showed she accepted her husband, but didn't give any indication to him that she accepted his affair. Could you please elaborate what that means/ looks like, exactly? How do you accept your spouse, while not accepting their affair? I'm having a hard time understanding how that doesn't disrespect the wife herself.
That's a great question @skylit84! For specific questions like this, you may want to consider giving us a call directly. We can help guide you to the best resources that can help turn your marriage situation around and answer specific things like this. You can call us directly at 1 866 903 0990, or schedule a coaching session with one of our certified coaches here: bit.ly/3P6QDwK
first you assume the prize is worth the price...for more and more of us it is not.
sadly reality says marriage is over as an institution, look at the stats! Numbers and trends are my job and reality often sucks; but is none the less reality.
For those still trying to win at this game the best of luck and God bless you.
Funny how she refers to the one wanting out as “he.”
That clearly doesn’t exist anymore. Now it’s the “she” that wants to leave…
What if he can't forgive himself?
Why would anyone want to bend backwards for the person who has betrayed the marriage?
I have slow data
This is what I am going through right know . How can you trust your husband if he cheating on you. He says to trust him that is really hard to do.
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I've been doing the donts it's been a little over a week. This sucks. Hopefully I can save it.
Hi friend,i really understand how you feel right now,do you really need help?
I know of someone that helped me fix my marriage with my partner.
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Am tied of fixing it cz he has moved in with someone else but he keeps on telling me he loves me,it hurts
Hello, I can refer you to someone who helped me out in getting back with my ex lover. He's the best when it come to recovery of broken relationships.
Just wondering why cheat ?😢 When you can tell it to your spouse that you dont love her or like her anymore 😭😭
So we can move on to our different life and start all over for a new life, 🙏😇
Tell me about it.. No need to cause more pain or mess.. Why just not start a new life and be honest or try best you can to repair your current relationship instead of involving a third person in it.. People should really work on their moral compass and be aware how much damage can an infidelity cause.. Nothing is black and white and there are levels to everything but being unfaithful to your partner and doing things that could hurt him/her with someone else is just like being stabbed in the back by a person you would never imagine of being able to do such thing.. That's how it feels to be betrayed.. It's just wrong...
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how can you even do that when the spouse doesn't want to be intimate in anyway. and youre not in love
Why are you saying that it is "he" is the one that is saying that?
"PIES" means "feet" in Spanish. So we should stand on our PIES.
How I wish my marriage can be restored
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I cheated on her she wants out and wants to divorce should I text her randomly just to say good morning or good night?
Do u need help
@@allisonwills5529
Yes I do yesterday's we had a bad argument.
Her
Oh my god I love how everything she says is based on the assumption that the woman is completely innocent
Swallow your pride.
@@mrhunterf2869 thats not how shit works, have some self repect put her in her place, be a man and assert you dominance as a man if she doesnt like it then theres other women that will
@@mrhunterf2869 never become submisive, if you give your woman an inch of insecurity she will take it as a weakness, if you give her control she will take all of it
Women need to feel cared for. Happy marriages rely on happy wives just as much on happy husbands, if not more.. And most households suffer when it's the woman suffering because she ( in most cases) runs the house and children etc...so if she's not happy no one is happy
@@neematm8266 no.. a househould is unhappy because when a woman is unhappy she throws the energy outwards. A household could have a depressed husband and their lives will go on, because a man is able to function normally and bottle things in, a woman takes it out on the people around her. The relationship is only in danger when the female is unhappy.
If you have to fix your marriage it's already over you have to go back to the one bad moment that started the beginning of the end of your marriage. The house the car, kids savings accounts, business etc is keeping a person locked in a relationship that could be horrible. To start completely over from scratch could mean living with parents or siblings like a teenager. This gives low self esteem sometimes only because you can't support yourself at this time.
Your perspective is from the other side than mine.
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Should I wish her a happy birthday while separated?
No
What if ,your spouse is illiterate and doesn t understand ,please respond
Do u still need help
My husband will not tell the truth ... he is killing me
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@@joya8490 He messed around with a woman that he had a affair with 20 years ago and she had just friended me on Facebook and she told me she was so sorry for what happened all them years ago and I forgave her .. well I got a voicemail of them having sex that she left on my phone . He s as us it's not him but I know my own husbands voice .. 25 years of marriage.
@@joya8490 what is that number
My husband walked away because I am fat...until I lose 30 pounds he won't be back..as if repairable he said
Why don't you both work out?
You know it will help..
Do not be dishearten its all him not you.
@@ENIGMAXII2112 I am the one with the problem 😔😔
You are not the problem. It’s him, he is the unhappy one so make yourself happy for you not him.
I gained a lot of weight after my surgery and diagnosis of RA. It's difficult for me to work out & lose weight too. Funny thing karma, that girl is getting fat & they are both getting old looking due to their drug use. Lol! She told me I was fat & I told her I can lose weight but you can't fix ugly, can you? I don't know if I want him back anymore. He lied, talked about me, discussed private things with her & betrayed me.
We don't deserve that. We deserve to be treated better.
If you want to lose weight, start slow. Walk. Just get out & walk. Talk to your neighbors, smile & say hello. Get yourself positive. Good luck!