To Forgive My Ex-husband, I Needed to See Him through God’s Eyes | His Grace
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- čas přidán 5. 08. 2021
- Becky always wished for her husband’s happiness. Their marriage was idyllic, and they were blessed with three children. But about seven years into their marriage, Becky found pornographic images on the computer. She left a note on the computer but never confronted her husband. Over the years he became better at hiding his addiction and online encounters, and she suppressed her concerns. This standstill continued until the day he told her on the porch that he didn’t see their marriage continuing.
Becky was devasted. She never saw it coming. Her grief and pain never seemed to end. One day, their son noticed that his father was driving “weird.” Becky’s husband was later diagnosed with a degenerative disease that soon required the constant care of his children. When it became too much for them, Becky came to his aid. She wondered at times why God left him on earth. “What good is he here?” she thought in anger and disgust.
She felt she needed to pray and ask God to help her see her former husband as He saw him. She came to know he was a son of God and learned to feel compassion for him. As she treated him with love, his strained relationships with their children began to mend.
When asked how she was able to show compassion to the man who divorced her and disrupted their family, Becky said that she had felt God’s grace. She said, “The power of the Atonement can change hearts and lives.”
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Charity is the pure love of Christ. This woman is not weak, she is strong and has charity.
Amen . Her testimony shares light on how God has answered simple and pure direct questions. "Help me see him through your eyes as a Son of God". WOW
I was just going to say that!
Such a powerful message within this story. I’m sure people will question whether the ex deserved the forgiveness and compassion. Regardless of that debate though, she found peace and healing through the atonement, and that’s what really matters.
Forgiveness is for us too and doesn’t necessarily change the other person. We have to clear that unforgives and all the emotions that come along with it out of our body and spirit. It’s a choice we make sometimes hourly sometimes daily sometimes monthly sometimes back to hourly but it’s just a choice we remake when we’re triggered. It’s not necessarily an emotional destination like people think.
@@strawberryme08 YOU ARE SO RIGHT!! I wish people understood that forgiveness isn't an excuse for the behavior but a release from pain. Let the atonement do the work it was meant to do. Every single day I'm so grateful there's someone bigger than me in charge. I never want the to be the end all of everything or anything for that matter. I thank the Lord he's got this 💕🙏💕🙏💕
Love, its love !! None of us are perfect and we are free when we can forgive and love
I hope someday to forgive my ex husband for the things he did to me. The trauma is to raw but I know God's grace is enough.
Do it tonight
Matthew 6 15
Matthew 18 35
Mosiah 26 31
D&C 64:10
It's a process. The Lord knows this. The more you include Him and ask for His help in the messy process, you will find the help you need to get there.
I know, my friend. 6 years since my divorce, still hurts too much. Hold on.
Life can be so hard, especially when betrayed by those who should love us the most. Someday, all will be healed.
I will pray for you❤
Forgiveness is one of the hardest decisions and one of the most powerful acts one can make in life.
Absolutely agree 👍
In 1997, Elder Enzio Busche gave this advice: "When you cannot love someone, look into that person's eyes long enough to find the hidden rudiments of the child of God in him." Periodically, I also find myself in prayer acknowledging that, although I cannot see why or how God loves others, I know they are also His children and that somehow for reasons I cannot or do not see God loves them too. I have asked God to bless these people because He loves them and for patience with their shortcomings until I can see them through His eyes. I still don't love some of them as I ought, but their behavior no longer weighs me down or cripples my ability to lift where I stand. I know that sometimes others may not be able or willing to see the child of God in me. We see through a glass darkly, and our experience with others in mortality is limited in scope, scale and time. We cannot see their hearts or souls or minds or struggles. So, we forgive because we hope that, when God takes those things into account for us as well, Christ will intercede enough on our behalf that God will forgive us too.
Exactly🤍
Thankfulness for the atonement should always include that message: It's for EVERYONE, which is why we're encouraged to bring others to Christ, so they have their opportunities to repent just like we do.
Thanks for your comment🕊
I love that 1977 talk. Well spotted/connected 👍
@@martinkent333 you okay bud?
Interesting thought.
me too. Love that talk! It is tender.
What a beautiful soul she has. The willingness to love one of God's children despite every thing the world teaches, giving her "freedom" to hate and be resentful, and seeing the beauty in the hard.
I can just feel the peace this woman received by consistently choosing to forgive. ♥️
Thank you for this message
Amen 💗
There will be good days, there will be bad days, but there will be God in every day... Just follow with Faith the Commandments that they gave you Going every Sunday to take the sacrament because only then will you be blessed and have Eternal Life:) Great testimony
This is only possible through and with the help of Heavenly Father. The healing power of the atonement is real and it is beautiful. Thank you for sharing ♥️
I'm still in the process of figuring out how His grace can help my marriage. Life is tuff, no doubt about it and several times I just want to quit. But I promised myself one thing for sure that I would never give up trying. I'm not happy but I hope through Christ's promises that one day all things will be healed. Hope is truly the only thing that keeps me going.
Non of my business.
But keep praying, talk to your bishop. You can't do it alone, and you don't have to.
I agree. I sure as heck can't do it alone. This why I call my family a lot... And many trips to Taco Bell
God's grace is all sufficient , dear one . Keep knocking at God's door of grace & mercy , to receive strength so as to face life's challenges . HE ( the Lord Jesus Christ) will definitely see us through !
Please look up personality disorder and emotional abuse to find out if you are experiencing that. If you are, the only thing you can do is leave, if you are not, then you'll know its probably worth it to keep trying. Best of luck to you, you deserve to be happy.
What an amazing woman. Truly an example of exactly what our Savior wants us to be.
I love the sentence "Help me to see him through your eyes."
This hits close to home. She is definitely a better person than me, because I have not yet built up the courage to forgive my ex and the pain she caused me. I know I should, but it’s so difficult. I hope time will heal everything
Dear Brother, We are so sorry to hear about your heartbreak- even if we do not know details. Relationships are fragile and can break at anytime. Time, forgiveness and the support and love of others are (Especially the Love of God) are essentials for true healing. When you feel you can not... Ask God for the strength to cary on- until it comes. No, it will not be easy, but it is a choice we can make and worthy goal to work towards (forgiveness and the choice to find future happiness and fulfillment in life). God will never leave you comfort less. Surrender your heart to Him and He will make you whole again.
I had to learn forgiveness for myself during seperation/ divorce.
Hugs
Dear precious child of God.
I know that it is hard to truly come to forgive someone, that you cherished and love so much.
I know because I had to walk this path also. I believe that forgiveness comes in time and learning to forgive someone comes in time. Until you have walked this path you truly cannot understand your heart being torn out and thrown upon the ground and trying to breathe and to pick it up and put it back, but Heavenly Father truly does that for you.
Blessings, prayer, journaling the hurt and reading it and tearing it up and yes cry those tears out. Heavenly Father made those tears for a reason and weeping softens that heart and makes it soft again.
Bless you and peace be with you. Amen
This prayer not only works for others but for oneself as well. I've been praying daily for several months now that God will help me see others the way he does, love others as he does, and forgive others as he does; then I ask for the same heavenly perspective for myself. It is transformative and peace yielding. Thank you for sharing your story.
This girl shines like a candle.
This is so true! Seeing people through God's eyes changes everything. He truly does love us!
Yes! 🥺😊
She is an absolute saint! Bless you for your Christlike example and for sharing your story!
What a strong testimony. Excellent job, I think this is a great way to truly 'love thy enemy'. It is incredible to have our perspective expanded and given the understanding that our living Father has. His love for us isn't based on our obedience, accomplishments or any other thing. We are his children.
What a beautiful testimony. So true. I watched this with my kids. I am divorced and can feel for the pain that was caused but I also can feel the love that she has as she is able to see others the way Heavenly Father does. I was on the side her husband was and neither side is good to be on but the sight of change is a beautiful thing.
Awesome👍🏻
No matter which side of the situation you're on, His atonement can heal your life. Over time things can "recalculate" or change course as you KEEP getting back up and moving forward with constant communication w/ Heavenly Father. You're His son, and He wants you back as much as ANY of us.
Have a BLESSED day! 🌞
🥺🥺🥺 that’s our Love teaching of Bible. “Let me see him through your eye’s God” 😔 heart touching it’s so difficult to forgive who had wrong to us. God bless you
She is an angle on earth. I hope her life s continues to be filled with peace and love and fulfillment.
Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself not the other person.
What she did was very hard to do and I hope she is blessed abundantly for her big heart and finds someone worthy of her beauty and soul x
Learn to see life through God's eyes is a big difference
You are a beautiful, brave woman! It takes a lot of courage to love someone who is difficult to love! Bless you and your sweet family!
Thank you, it’s so inspiring. Seeing the people around us with God’s eyes is so powerful. Love you Becky.
Such meekness. What a wonderfully strong woman.
Wow. This video was probably the best part of my day. I am amazed at the ability of women to carry on, and to see past the ugliest weaknesses in humans. Addiction, divorce, trauma, hell on earth ….countered by love. Amazed.
This is one of the most powerful testimonies I have heard in a while. Thank you so much for sharing this. I encountered something this morning and this right here is a direct message for me from our Heavenly Father. May He help me see someone I need to forgive through God's eyes.
Beautiful message of forgiveness and understanding! God definitely loves all of us...even though we may not love ourselves or choose the right. You will be blessed for your faith and charity as will your children and millions through your message of healing and hope.
God show us forgive each other this beautiful 🙏😇
So Beautiful!❤ As someone who has gone through a similar experience, I admire your strength and humbleness to overcome all those feelings that were keeping you from seeing him in God's eyes. Thank you for sharing!
Sister, you are so sweet ❤️ This experience that we call “life on earth” is so unpredictable and unfair. Still, as children of an all mighty and all powerful Father in Heaven and our Savior, Jesus Christ- we can overcome our trials and find happiness and joy in this life and the life to come. Hang in there, take life one moment at a time and just do your best. It isn’t easy, but it will be worth it in the end. Remember that Christ became our Savior and Redeemer by the things he suffered. Each of us will not achieve our best selves- if we are unwilling to bare our crosses. You are loved and Angles have been assigned to watch over you, guide you, and love you. You may very well discover that these Angles are and were your own family ancestors- that know you and love you as their own- which you are! Be faithful and all things will work out for your good. Your brother in Christ
Very good woman. He was lucky to have her.
Here are my thoughts on this guys! I am amazed of the goodness in this dear sister! She truly not only understands the Gospel of Jesus Christ, she lives it in full. I admire people with such tremendous amount of faith and faith to act in harmony with the Lord’s teachings.
It’s also, I found out for myself, easier to be able to see someone in their wrong doings as a child of God rather than someone close. It hurts more! Much more! So hats down to this sister again!
Amazing. With so much hate and anger in the world, this is such a great example of Christ-like love. I have an ex that put me through years of pain and suffering after our divorce. But after getting to know Christ and His gospel, I have been able to forgive him.
This woman is amazing!
She is truly a saint. I am humbled by her love and compassion. Her story really moved me and it is an example of following the savior.
She is a very strong women. God bless her and her family...
You are a beautiful example of Christlike forgiveness, Becky. Yes, the Atonement of Christ is miraculous in the ability to open our eyes and soften our hearts. Thank you for sharing your tender story with us. My father passed away a few months ago, and although divorced from my mother decades ago, she cleaned out his home, gave him rides to doctor visits, got him his meds, and checked in on him until the end. You saintly women received your crowns early.
It's a very charitable thing she did, (caring for her ex-husband), especially in light of his mistreatment towards her during their marriage. This is a strong example of kindness. HOWEVER....
I do wonder if the ongoing videos and messages like this can potentially be harmful to the emotional health of some people that are immersed within the LDS culture/religion. Yes, the messages to forgive and be kind are necessary and true. But, on the flip side: it's as equally important of a message to preach/understand that personal boundaries are so very important to emotional, physical and spiritual health. Our current religious culture lacks that crucial counter-message to forgiveness.
Although we are to work towards forgiveness, 70x70 does not mean in order to be like Christ, we must continue to stay within a relationship or invest in someone that generally doesn't treat you well, has betrayed or abandoned you. Simply because Christ endured mistreatment during his time on earth, doesn't mean God intends for us willfully submit to unhealthy and unkind treatment in the name of "forgiveness" or "grace."
The church doesn’t encourage anyone to stay in an abusive relationship. Cheating is abusive.
I couldn’t agree with you more. Wonderfully put.
They got divorced
Thank you for saying that, it is so true. I am often very annoyed at how some of these videos ignore the reality of sins committed by spouses or other people in these videos and focus on loving and forgiving these people ASAP. What about repentance for the other peson? What about emotional healing for the person abused or betrayed? Your post was very well put.
@@AngelicHelper Yes, I am aware of the fact that they did get divorced (please note who did the divorcing). That's where my "... or **invest in someone** that generally doesn't treat you well, has betrayed or abandoned you." comment comes into play.
After her ex fell ill, she continued to invest in him by caring for him. I'm not judging her for doing so; I acknowledged it was a wonderful example of charity!!!
But again, I simply wish our religion would more often offer the alternative message: that personal boundaries (behaviors/language/attitudes that we will or will not allow within our relationships) are so very crucial to emotional, physical and spiritual health of even LDS members.
Possessing "His grace" doesn't mean we must willfully submit to unhealthy and unkind treatment within relationships or invest in people that don't, or haven't in the past, treated you well, betrayed or abandoned you. Especially if it's long-term: doing that is not applying grace... It's being a doormat.
Damn-Patience of a Latter Day Saint! He was surrounded by Family alright on BOTH Sides! Telling him goodbye on this side and right there welcoming him as he passed through!
What a beautiful message! THIS is what the world needs right now, real charity. Everyone please leave a comment or reply to one even just a single word. How about a quality you are working on or one that has brought peace or light to your life. This helps in the CZcams algorithm so this video will be suggested to more people. Let's help spread this light.
This woman is beyond strong.
I know how it feels and this exactly what i do receive from God as my question what He wants me to do of my infidel husband. He told me that He loveth all his chidren,he loves him (my ex husband) as he loves me as well. He told me to see him as how He sees me His children. That moment I come to realized that it is only HIM can judge a person. I also did forgive my husband,.but were never back again.
hurts to hear that.
Wow! That's real charity right there. 🙏
Wow what an amazing story of forgiveness!
Thank you for sharing your story. ❤️
Wow this is so beautiful. So inspiring and light filled. Thank you for sharing
I know a case of where a woman's marriage fell apart due to the husband's affair. They divorced, and his affair dissolved as well. Months later he was diagnosed with stage four cancer. His ex-wife then became caregiver for him. The atonement can help is so many situations to move on from the hurt and pain of disappointment.
Thank you for this kind of message
We can learn so much from this woman. She is an angel who has pure love for others, even when they have wounded her deeply. Thank you for sharing your faith and strength ❤💪
Be blessed, this is a great lesson 🙌.
My story LDS, my wife polluted our only child's mimd and helped her into gender reassignment. My only child got addicted to methamphetamine and taken to jail twice in Texas, the 3d time she got arrested, she hung her self in Jail. This story has a happy warm fussy feeling ending. Their never ever ever will, I ever feel that warm feeling tell
The Almighty God answer's why.
And one day he will. That I can promise you. He will show you your wife's life through her eyes as well as your daughters eyes...and then you will know and understand completely...
❤ Thank you for sharing
Beautiful message!
What a powerful lesson! Thank you!
People can be so Forgiving and loving ❤️ Thank you for being this way.
That was a good story Amen, God bless you all and that God loves you all and that he is with you 🙏✝️❤️😇🙌👼👑
Your heart seems so genuine.
Powerful. Thank you for being vulnerable enough to share your story.
I understand it completely. My healing didn’t begin until after my spouse passed. I have found the love that was lost and feel at peace
I'm loving these previews
You are such a great example, and God will bless you for the integrity of your heart. I was able to forgive someone who thoughtlessly took the life of a dear family member. Healing from the pain that comes as a result of others' choices can happen quickly, but often it could take years. Forgiving ourselves can be a long process too, however Christ is the master healer, and is the only lasting source of hope. He can make our lives blossom in ways unimaginable, if we love him, and put our trust in him!
Thank you for sharing your amazing experience!
🙏 Listening to her tears rolling down, i am a woman with my two daughters living in a very Painful Life always with tears n sorrow, my Mind my Heart n my Soul is really Hurting 🙏 Praying for our Happy Safe n Peaceful Family Life 🙏
Thank you, Lord.
Such a powerful experience of forgiveness... loved this so much! Thank you for sharing your story! ❤
This actually happened to a good friend of mine, he's the one who got caught watching pornography, his wife felt betrayed and could no longer be in the same room as him. He repented and never turned to it again after proper help. His wife couldn't forgive him so he divorced her after 2 years of being separated, they too have 3 children but, they remain good friends and respect eachothers separate lives.
This is an incredibly hard thing to do... Something I feel like I fail at quite frequently. I was literally praying for help with loving difficult people or those who wrong us and this was recommended in my feed. (A coincidence, I think not...)
I will continue to strive to love my neighbors and my enemies, however imperfect I am and rely on the grace of Christ whenever I fail. I'm eternally grateful for Jesus Christ and his infinite atonement.
Beautiful piece. You're a strong momma and a true follower of Christ, stay blessed sweetheart
this is amazing
Amazing testimony. What a spiritual giant.🙏🏽
Beautiful...................
Only the savior knows the end from the beginning. I have learned through our savior Jesus Christ to love all his children without judgment or without saying he did that or she did this. Sometimes it can be hard to love someone, but honestly it's not that hard. All we have to do is say to ourselves, what would the savior do in this situation and the answer is clear as day. I say these things humbly in the name of my savior and redeemer Jesus Christ Amen
I am a child of God, and He has sent me here..
Lol
My ex-husband wanted an abortion with my daughter. He always wanted other women, and his alcohol. I'm so glad, I didn't listen to him. My daughter is a Beautiful woman today. I never knew he was Bi-polar until my daughter told me he was. I feel like one day, he's going to stand in front of God, with his actions.
God bless you!
It is a beautiful message. But I wonder if her husband had not died but had gone on to live a picture perfect life leaving her disabled and broken, would she still feel the same way? I am not judging anyone, but sometimes we make living the gospel into a perfect picture and it's not always.
I really love this video! I just was a little taken aback at the end, wondering what that was about with the husband?!
The ending was a preview of a different, and unrelated, story. I had to watch it a couple of times to catch the brief written message that explained it. It was confusing!
The end was confusing. Looked to be the makings of another video or her husband?
I can’t even imagine going through that. Betrayal by my husband has been the worst thing I’ve ever experienced, and he has actually been in recovery from his addiction for about a year now. This woman was way too pure and good of a soul. She did not deserve any of this. My heart breaks and watching this video just makes me cry.
Very admirable. The pure love of Christ.
1st story was extraordinary. Then 2nd story started but ended without resolution. Was it meant to be a whole other video? Was that her ex-husband? Confusing.
It was a "trailer" for the next one of these messages that will come out soon. "His Grace" appears to be a series of short stories like this, but this is the first one I have seen.
I think the second video was unrelated...just a preview of the next production, not a continuation
Little editing issue on the end of that video. But wow I am stunned by your humility and Christlike love.
HOW COULD YOU NOT DO IT. Love is so powerfull.it motivate s all that is good in life.. I all ways found trust so hard. But now I find the faith to love my fellow man ..trust is easier...
Christ like love .. is to love regard less of the return. On the investment.
Praise the Lord
Wow..God's love is the strongest love that can conquer anger and hate.. I am glad that this woman was able to love unconditionally through God's love.. On the other hand, I think God has curtail the evil in this man by allowing a disease in him.. I just hope that he asked forgiveness and and had a true remorse before his death.. He was lost at a very young age of 14 and continued to be lost even at his old age.. It is very important for parents to teach their children about the commandments of God and nurture them to have a strong love and obedience to God..
You are amazing; I’ve worked a long time to forgive.
This is a true latter-day SAINT!
What a good video
Thanks Jesus🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
Super
An amazing woman! I am not sure I could be this Christ like!
I love my ex-husband and people think the worst of me.. But when 2 soul come together after 500 years of being lost and forgotten its easier to forgive. I only pray he will be a good person one day, and see his lost soul and one day we can be together. However maybe God needs more time for us..
Forgiveness for those who cause hurt and life changing experiences will bring blessings that weren't shown for a reason of teaching us to see and feel the energy within us all...
Thank you
You my dear are a prize to be won by someone worthy to be as happy as you can make him. I pray that that opportunity comes your way soon. Love you soooooo much.
I agree.
So an emotional story
God help us to see others the way he does
I know what this lady is talking about. I went through something horrific with my ex as well with pornography and infidelity. But along with that my ex was given anxiety meds that messed with his head so bad that be went through complete psychosis and needed hospital stays and round the clock care. Took several years to stabilize him and I stayed by his side the whole time while being verbally and emotionally abused daily. We had five young kids I was trying to keep safe and there were times when the doctor told me to hide everything in the house that could be a weapon because he was homicidal and suicidal. I hid my children in the basement with big brother who was few years older than all the rest night after night with doors locked from the inside in case I would fall asleep. Most the time I didn't, I stayed up to make sure ex was okay. He chewed on pillows as he struggled with those strong feelings of suicide and homicide. God was the ONLY thing that got me through that. We've been divorced now for several years but I'm still his caregiver and will be till he passes on I'm sure. It's hard because our children have nothing to do with him, haven't seen him in few years, it's only me he sees. I take him his groceries and make sure he has all he needs. I wouldn't be able to do it if I didn't go through the process of forgiveness. I cannot express enough how important that is, if for nothing but your own peace🕊️.
God bless you dear sister.
You are a hero to me on multiple levels!
May God bless you, sister. You are so brave.
@@rjsimpkins2911 wow that's so kind of you. I don't feel like a hero but the kindness is welcomed💕🙏
@@robthebeekeeper8997 thank you😊
MAY GOD BLESS YOU HAVE A GREAT DAY JESUS IS KING
You are Blessed With love Of Christ Crucified.
Remember two keep comment respectful never going given up own our lord Jesus Christ amen
This is next level
😲😲😲😲😲 O god bless you
PRAISE THE LORD JESUS
AVE MARIA VAZHGA
👍👍👍
Wow