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Late Diagnosed Autistic People Unmasked
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- čas přidán 22. 05. 2024
- Hi! I'm Orion Kelly and I'm Autistic. This video is edited highlights from a live stream featuring @WoodshedTheory, @NeurodiverJENNt, and @MomontheSpectrum. #orionkelly #autism #asd #autismsigns #whatautismfeelslike
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ABOUT ORION:
Orion Kelly is an #ActuallyAutistic vlogger (CZcamsr), podcaster, radio host, actor, keynote speaker and Autistic advocate based in Australia. Orion is all about providing validation and support for Autistic people and their loved ones.
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Related: autism, autism diagnosis, Orion Kelly, orionkelly, thatautisticguy, tiktok videos, autistic, autism in adults, autism in women, autism in men, autism spectrum condition, asd, autism spectrum disorder, aspergers, aspergers syndrome, autism in boys, autism in girls, dsm, dsm5, autistic adults, autistic kids, autism mom, autism parent, autism family, autism speaks, autism awareness, autism acceptance, autism at work, am I autistic, adult autism test, autism disclosure, autism therapy, autism prevention, autism meltdown, autistic burnout, autistic behavior, autism symptoms, autism traits, autistic signs, what autism feels like, love on the spectrum, stimming, echolalia, anxiety
When I got diagnosed at 27, my clinician asked me "So what's your diagnosis?" I said well if I have it I've had it all my life. it's not like I've got cancer. He replied yes you are autistic, though you are self-aware and are already doing things in your life that will assist you.
This was like an ASD content creator all-star game! Loved this discussion! Thank you for putting it together Orion!
This is an historic video. Where have you ever seen four NDs together with a world of chatters online watching???? OMG!!! IM SO EXCITED TO SEE!!!! LOVE LOVE LOVE I smiled like an idiot the whole time and laughed out loud numerous times!!!!!!!
Not officially diagnosed, at 53, going through the process. I am positive I have delayed processing; I am terrible when I’m put on the spot and a neuropsych eval revealed my adult son has working memory and executive function issues, scored low on that portion of one of the tests.
Although I’m not “official”, I strongly suspect I am and the masking thing is what actually led me to believe I am bc last year I spent months with a therapist trying to figure out why I can’t be my true self. I kept asking “but why can’t I just be myself?” I would say that was the defining moment that led me to pursue formal diagnosis and further research. I appreciate you all so much as an older adult, and the ways autism has touched my life in so many ways (pretty sure my sister is too, long story there) cannot be understated.
🥇Best AuDHD+ conversation group on CZcams.
I'm autistic with intellectual disability and adhd. Diagnosed in march 2024. My interest is witchcraft and to an extent violin. I can't mask but according to the cat q I am a high masker. No one in my work history likes me and I come across as antisocial. I can't communicate, I only talk if I ask questions about the job I'm doing.
Yayyyy! I’ve been looking forward to this after I had to sleep through the livestream! So cool to have you all together!
I am so glad I zoned back in for when "constructive interference" was discussed. My mitochondria are vibing with this right now. Thank youuuu
Thank you for putting this together. :)
"Flashbacks to Uni" with the keyboard. Holy shit! I was in the dorm in the US sharing a room and the roommate would stay up ALL night writing her papers and it was....just pure agony with the keyboard. I totally feel the keyboard CPTSD
I definitely feel the "You mean suffering like this _isn't_ normal?" vibe. So many things I just thought everybody went through, but have been gradually developing the understanding that it's pretty specific to neurodivergent people (especially adult/late diagnosed).
I also loved the constructive interference conversation.
The BS radar thing is so true, too (I tend to say that I have X-ray vision precisely because I see through the bullshit that other people are slinging; I'm frequently not convinced that they themselves even see it).
Also, while there's nothing wrong with working hard or trying, it's important to remember a few things related to that.
Let's start with the "pull yourself up by your bootstraps" saying. That was *always* a derisive joke, coined by the labor side of the equation to ridicule toxic assertions made by the capitalist/owner class side. It's literally not possible to pull yourself up by your bootstraps (they're on your boots, not above you; it would require cartoon physics to be real). That saying has been _coopted_ unironically by the Modernist project (or in more current terms, _neoliberal_ thought and values) and Capitalist thought as part of _blaiming victims_ of that system for the problems they experience, rather than acknowledging that the system itself harms large swaths of people or is in need of reformation or overhaul.
The truth is, in sociogical terms, *it doesn't work* (never did). It was always bullshit. We as humans are necessarily mutualistic, dependent on one another to live. The _personal responsibilty_ push was always a toxic artifact of an inhumane system used to subordinate the many to the whims of a privileged few. Don't listen to these stupid lies; they're killing us all, not just neurodivergent people.
Stupid little fact: Slap Yo Mamma is also the name of a spice mix. My sister-in-law is obsessed with it, using it in nearly everything (overusing it IMO). Personally, I like more subtle flavors, and varieties of them, but YMMV.
A. The moon being in retrograde was a joke and said very obtuse on purpose.
B. Highly aware of the impossible physics of pulling oneself up by the bootstraps as well as the history. However, do you think an argument could be made for the shift in meaning as happens with implications of nomenclature over time? I'm not saying that is or isn't the definitive case here. I understand the physics and inference of working oneself beyond capacity... But is there room to consider a shift in the culture of the phraseology?
@@NeurodiverJENNt
WRT A: I didn't mention the moon in retrograde thing (and I assumed it was a joke, since it can't go retrograde). Was that maybe directed at another comment?
WRT B: Fair enough, but it does not seem to be common knowledge, at least as far as I can tell, and it wasn't obvious from your use of it that you were aware of its original meaning. Perhaps you were joking there, too. I think that term is used very, very commonly _without_ reference to that original meaning, and without understanding that it should be questioned. The mainstream meaning of it surely doesn't seem to understand its history (and I hope you'll pardon me for what seemed like a reasonable assumption that your use matched the mainstream usage).
With that phrase, no, I don't personally think there *is* room for a shift in meaning with it, at least not one that loses track of its roots. There remains a pervasive assumption supporting the untenable _personal responsibilty_ narrative that I consider profoundly unhealthy and uncritical of the status quo, and the systems that *continue* to plague us all. Again, it's bad for everyone, regardless of neurology, and if we allow it to go unchallenged, it will *remain* bad for everyone. But it is especially bad for neurodivergent people since it's part-and-parcel of problematizing difference, and blaming individuals for not fitting in.
Use the phrase as you please, but I consider it a moral imperative to point out the (still to this day) toxic place it comes from (and thus I will continue challenging its use, though not your personal use of it, since you've expressed awareness of it).
@@icanhasutoobzwell shyt, you're correct about that first point.
Second, I can totally respect your desire to educate others on the meaning behind that phrase, and there was no way for you to know my knowledge of the history of the word based on how I used it.
I do think we could have a conversation on locus of control and personal responsibility alongside the need for community, and find areas where we could agree to disagree but I'll save that for another day.
I appreciate the respectful conversation.
@@NeurodiverJENNt I suspect in a longer, more nuanced conversation we would have little that we would _need_ to agree to disagree about. I'm certainly not against the idea of people taking responsibility for their own words and actions (I'm a pretty big proponent of it, actually), just the notion that these things happen in a social vacuum, and that individuals can take _personal_ responsibility for _systemic_ issues (which, unfortunately, seems to be the most common context for which such phrases are deployed, at least AFAICT). But as you said: another day. Meanwhile, I'm happy to accept a shift in meaning WRT to that and similar phrases as soon as they are no longer being used in the mainstream unironically, and the problematic expectations surrounding them cease to be a thing. It's the unspoken expectations and assumptions that tend to accompany such phrases that rub me the wrong way, not the phrases per se (and not the individuals using them, but the societal inertia that keeps them going).
I do not understand why people struggle to differentiate level one ASD and ADHD. I certainly do not think they should be lumped together. I have a level 1 autism and while I have executive dysfunction, I have been assessed for ADHD thoroughly and there is no sign of it whatsoever.
I agree. I have ASD level 1, and it’s definitely not the same thing as ADHD.
Thank you for doing this edit. I had to step away during the live bc it was overwhelming me, so I appreciate the opportunity to watch it this way.
Absolutely Orion!❤ Being authentic is important
"Taylor, How fast does the lawyer need it?" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
Constructive interference?! 🤯 Wooooow!!! Omg! That is A MAI ZIIIING !!! Thank you Orion! (Also sort of, after the 🤯, seems so obvious! Because to be authentic means to be ONE with everything, connected, probably SUPER CONNECTED to all the energy there is, so... 🤯)
Sorry I missed this! You four ROCK! Thanks for doing this.
the description of late diagnosed, ? You all look young. I’m very late diagnosed at 64, it’s a very difficult experience knowing I’ve lived more of my life than I have left to live. I’ve always been labeled as can’t fit into the team so as a nurse it was difficult, I knew all my procedures. I have masked myself for so long I don’t know how to live as an unmasked person. I tend to get in more verbal spats when I express the way I want to do my things in woodwork group. Ex teachers tell me to be quiet or stop talking when I answer a question, too quickly and it’s right, they get pissed off. I feel most at peace when I stitch or knit or be around my dogs and cooking food for my youngest son.
I thought this was a new collaboration then realized the last one was edited. Everyone is in different quarters of the screen this time.
3:28 Cool that you worked in radio, Orion. I’ve always been told that I had a face for radio, but I never went anywhere with it.
Just started watching this. Not seen Claire's channel before, subbed now.
'Delayed processor' I like that phrase
Hey brother Orion. I think it might be double the amplitude (power) when the 2 waves at the save frequency match, or sync up. 🙏🙏🙏👍😄
They can also cancel out when they don’t exactly align. Being the same frequency or different frequencies. Out of phase.
They can also add with different frequencies but not for full amount of each wavelength.
These points are all true, for actual waves using actual physics. The stuff about frequencies and love and authenticity etc, is unfortunately pseudoscience/BS. Ironically it came right before the 4 of them agreed that autistics have excellent BS detectors...
I will be kind and suggest that they meant BS in terms of not being authentic, which they may be good at detecting. But BS in terms of being untrue, I'm afraid they missed a real corker there.
It's true that certain people get along well, and I believe Orion when he says that he has a great time with authentic people and a horrible time with unauthentics. But authenticity has a wavelength that's 4000 x better than love?! I'd love to see the scientific paper describing the experiment, methods used, etc. (genuinely)
This actually highlights the vulnerabilities of autistic people, in terms of sometimes being naive and less streetwise, autistic women are more vulnerable to abusive relationships, etc. Not that believing in pseudoscience necessarily matters in this case.
Apart from that though, very insightful video. In fact even that part was interesting to watch, plus the fact that when autistic people interact the ticks or stims of one person can trigger sensitivities in another person so it's not necessarily plain sailing (this is an analogy, to illustrate that things dont always run smoothly!) but we saw that Orion was direct about how the keyboard sounds were affecting him and she took that feedback well and was appreciative of it.
@orionkelly "I feel like im the keyboard" 😂😂😂 Yey!
1:02:03 For older people like Orion and me, a childhood diagnosis would probably have resulted in our being put in some sort of a special school or even institutionalised, all the better to be abused. Neuro-divergence wasn't well understood back then, so even if you didn't end up under the purview of a bunch of sadists, they just didn't have a lot to help you.
I'm so sad I missed this live stream. I will be on the next one 🥺😭
Im glad we're differentiating between late diagnosed and non-late-diagnosed autistic people instead of lumping them together since they have totally unique struggles, psychological profiles and often vastly different levels of social intelligence
Huh didn't think about that
@smartsmartie7142 what, all of it or something in particular about it?
I didn't think about how an early diagnosis affects people. I am currently finding out I am autistic so it's interesting to me.
@@smartsmartie7142 ah gochu
Special Interest, Oh my goodness, anything that sparks my Interest "is my special interest". I go down the rabbit hole with any subject until I have filled my thirst for that topic.
Q: I am really interested what NTs would think about this interaction. I know NDs communicate effortless with one another, as do NT's. Do we sound different to them when we are all talking together? Does that make sense?
Watching this the first time: Was Love
Watching this the second time: Was Authentic!
19:23 Oh, Orion, I feel the pain of hearing people typing loudly. *I fucking hate it.* It's a form of torture for me. (Erm, yes, I think I might have some sensory issues.)
I've been struggling with the possibility of my own Autism for about 20 years. My cousin who is Autistic told me that he thinks I'm Autistic then and that's when I started considering it. I'm 59 now and there was never good support for a level one or two Autistic. I was diagnosed with Bipolar in 1989 but they might have diagnosed me with Autism if they knew as much about it as they know now. I should mention that the meds for Bipolar have actually helped a lot with the Autistic problems. I even got much better grades in school because of the meds.
Noise canceling headphones are so exspencive even Loops earplugs that i have ( everything better than nothing) and other things that are needing just to come through all the irritations and feelings erpvery day . If you earn not much money its allmost imposseble to buy one sadly 😢
I got headphones for $10. They are not noise cancelling but they block out more sound that Loops. Foam earplugs work well and are cheap. The only reason I got Loops were so I didn’t have bright earplugs in my ears.
You guys are a hoot. Have none of that anymore, sadly. 😂 📻 🎶 💿
The worst thing about it is that i spend years and years fore an assaynment but the psychic nurse just wouldnt listen and refused a test !
Shift abputndiagnoses IS so important. It’s naming clusters of things instead f having to explain in one hour you have a words and it’s not a label, but a communicative tool that increases understanding and abilities to navigate and open up our worlds! Freedom in diagnoses.
Omg was waiting for this.
The whole gang is there lol let’s goooo
I self identified about 6 weeks ago, I'm 64 years old, and knew I was 'different' as a small child. Several years ago a psychologist told me 'maybe you're just on the spectrum somewhere', and I mistook it as 'just a little weird', resulting in my discounting something very important.
Knowing now that I'm a high masking autistic, with all it's peaks and valleys, is like having your whole life story explained to you page by page.
Orion looks very young for being in his 80s 😂
Even in the Netherlands good health instans services are poor , not knowing anything about what autism is and how it affects our every day . Lots of mis diagnoses and antidepressiva later when you finally got the right diagnose .
Hello!!! I love your videos so much. They have helped me beyond anything I've found so far. I was wondering what your insight is on Borderline Personality Disorder. Specifically about Borderline Empathy Paradox. Someone has mentioned it to me, and I know I understand you thoroughly. It's why I'm such an avid watcher since my late diagnosis. Is there anyway you could shed some light on that subject at all? Thank you so much for your contributions ❤️
Am glad am not the only person that hates typing sounds
I’m all about #darkhumor and #dryhumor 😁
You know autistic people irritates the labels in clothing , seems in socks etcetera but what about spectacles and contactlenses ??? The sweaty feeling behind the glasses in the summer is one , pain behind the ears and on the nose but also if you can't wear an steal frame because of an allergie of metals etcetera . Is this reciniseble ?
glasses/sunglasses !! I can't stand them.
Good points. The best I can offer is a suggestion that you go back to the optometrist where you got the glasses and get them to adjust the glasses so that they fit better and don't injure you. I've had some that, without adjustment, were really going to do me an injury. Especially initially, you might find it easier if you just put the glasses on for (say) reading and then take them off as soon as you've finished reading, rather than trying to wear them from the time you get up to the time you go to bed.
I cannot come at contact lenses, full stop. Even if I could, I have a whole raft of eye problems and contacts wouldn't help, so I can't advise you in regard to them.
I sense a 4X meltdown coming. 😅
I have Tiffany on a cassette tape
I had her tape and I still have a bottle of Debbie Gibson’s Electric Youth perfume stashed somewhere 😂
Autism and Adhd are kinda completely opposite, but also kinda very similar
"Autism and Adhd (...) kinda very similar"
Just like males and females...
Jenn is now without yellow/blue in face , much better ❤
I'm also interested in the intersectionality in autoimmune disease and autism. My dad has psoriasis and my mom has several others. I have psoriasis.
Lmao "it's vibes"
Hello from Queensland Australia
Hello @Jennt from Colorado.
1:01:27 I'm assuming saying "a kid back in the 1940s" is a hyperbolic joke? or is he just a really spry 80 year old ? lol
I was joking.
I have to admit that I need to remind myself that content creators are deliberately looking good and that we don't see how they look on a bad day because otherwise I feel crappy because I'm always in dysregulated, chronically ill, mentally ill, gamer, couch potato mode. And since it's winter it's couch burrito.
I can't watch the person in the bottom right corner because I know they're looking at a camera or screen but it looks like they're making eye contact with me and it weirds me out, lol.
Also, I would 100% tune into a radio station to listen to Orion and music as long as it was ad-free, lol
Orion has some great videos, referred to as unmasked, unwatchable. The podcasts are worth the content, even if commercials
@@TheVOLTAGEVIDEOSNot "unmaked" but "unmasked".
I was giving ideas to Claire for products
The "Charlie's Angels" live stream! 😋
(but is Orion "Charlie" or "Bosley"?
❤❤❤❤
ASD creators... Unite!
Visor for connecting to my bug headphones. I need a hat. Hats don’t fit over my headphones
Oh darn I can put my headphones in top of the hat. I was doing it in the wrong order. Lols
When will we talk about actual late diagnosed people. I wasn't diagnosed until 52. My parent's called me retarded as a child and I grew up believing that even though I have had many successful careers. I wish I was diagnosed in my 20s or 30s, it would have made life less painful and difficult
Am so sad I missed this live
I’m gluten free too because I have celiac!
@MomontheSpectrum Yes, once you said that you might had been masking a bit more after the diagnosis, I realised that I'd been doing it as well, but in a weird way - putting a mask of a "more autistic person", or maybe "an autistic person other people want to see", and it still is NOT the real me... LOL, funny to suddenly see it. But I think it comes from the fact, that after 60 years of trying to fit in and pretending to be someone Im not, it seems almost impossible to figure out, WHO I ACTUALLY AM. Im planning to figure it out, with help of wonderful ppl like you guys ❤🔥
You know you're dealing with a southern girl when she says "goodness" as if god is an inappropriate word lol
It’s a Christian thing. “God” isn’t an inappropriate word, we just don’t like to use His name in vain as if His name is a curse word.
@@gigahorse1475 OK cultist
@@t-man5196 Hey, I just explained my beliefs to you in a nice and factual manner. Why resort to insulting me out of nowhere?
@@gigahorse1475 it's not an insult, just stating a fact
Yay, so exciting, I know I'm so late
Cake is gross. lol
Seems there is a spectrum and level 1 autism and adhd merge in so many ways…. I have supposedly “add inattentive type” and baseline autism that the add meds do not treat…. Been diagnosed w bipolar2, possible borderline or narc (as per my own suggestions or worries), I’ve considered schizo affective and all of these have been on meds and various meds… and they never fully work for me. At the end of the day, I think y mild dysphoria in childhood came from aidhd in a neurotypical world
I guys are suprer❤❤❤❤
I was thinking about Homer Simpson recently and I think he may be autistic. He shows allot of signs! 😅
Maybe my opinion is skewed because my dad used to say homer was just like him and my dad is clearly autistic.
The moon doesn’t go into retrograde. Why would one say that?
I actually meant to say Gatorade
This is too much, mate. Just saying. It’s just me. You’re doing a good job. But, I’m out. Cheers.
❤❤❤❤