Joe Rogan: "I Got Robbed in Brazil"
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- čas přidán 7. 02. 2024
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Shane Gillis and Matt McCusker are stand-up comics and hosts of "Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast". Catch Matt's comedy special "At the Speed of Light" on CZcams. Shane's latest special, "Beautiful Dogs", is available now.
Clip taken from JRE #2098 w/ Shane Gillis and Matt McCusker
Host: Joe Rogan
Guests: Shane Gillis and Matt McCusker
Producer: Jamie Vernon
#jre #joerogan - Komedie
Years ago I was robbed for $50 at gunpoint on Christmas Eve, and at the end the guy stuck something in my shirt pocket, and said “ Here you go, you will be all right “ and left, I checked my pocket and is was a quarter bag of weed, which would’ve cost $50 and it was really good to lol, none of my friends believed me when I told them
That was an involuntary barter not a robbery 😄
That’s the most aggressive but effective sales strategy ever
He probably went to buy H and they gave em weed, so he needed the $50 back, circle of life
That's just an aggressive salesman 😂
Homie just needed customers
"I Got Robbed in Brazil" is like saying "I ate cheeseburgers in the US"
You have to be brazen to go to Brazil
Not when is such a cordial exchange ehehe, I love Matt but as a Brazilian myself, I can guarantee that is not a typical robbery... I call it a hard cap for the funnies
Sounds like Matt's experience was much better than most of my cheeseburger experiences
Try going to McDonald's in it won't be that good..
😂
Matty C is the dark horse top 10 guest on the JRE and will be on future eps for a loooooong time
Mc*
Gillis and Mc is so underrated duo when on JRE. This podcast could last 12 h and still will go fast.
I know a brazilian teacher from a favela. The 12-14 yo kids have a drawer in the teacher table where the must leave all guns when entering the class room in the morning. They get them back at lunch and when they leave for home.
She said that one kid had an extra gun and shot another in the head cuz he had killed his cousin. ☹️ i have no problems. Thank god for my life. Im broke but im alive 🎉🎉
I love our country but we have severe poverty. Our whole infrastructure is horrible not even compared to US slums
Holy shit
@@yuurbi9136where do you live?
That's a lie, lol
@@jayn6943 from Porto alegre. My family moved to Georgia US and the ghetto here are 10x better. I mean it’s violence here but I can atleast stand outside everyday and not have to worry about shots
getting roasted by robbers because of your sight-seeing plans
thats on a whole new planet of fucking hilarious lmaoo
Comparing favelas to fallout 4 is the most accurate way to explain that to someone who's never seen them.
Both are filled with feral ghouls
feral ghouls 💀💀
I fuckin hate to admit it but you are 100% correct : / (source: 40 years of Brazil)
WTF is fallout?
Knowing what fallout 4 is but not knowing favelas is peak American stupidity
“That makes boys in the hood like Sesame Street” 😂😭
I remember once when I was living in nyc (im from Brazil), a few friends from work took me to the Bronx and told me I should get ready to see some hood shit and bla bla... all I can say is that I did not have the heart to tell them that looked like a very nice neighborhood for me.
I grew up in the northeast US and while I absolutely loved Boyz In The Hood a lot of my friends and I were confused about it. "They have lawns and fences and actual houses instead of apartments and concrete"!
These guys are by far my favorite trio on the podcast
Nothing can phase the shaman 🙏
Faze
@@KaninTuzi thanks, never knew that!
@@Cp_9900 No worries, mate
My friends had a similar story in Rio almost 20 years ago. They were drunk at a nightclub and left when the sun was coming up. Being drunk they thought it would be cool to walk home on Copacabana beach. They walked about 100m before being robbed by 3 guys on motorbikes.
They took their wallets and watches and started driving off when my drunk friend screamed out "I need my ID and credit card". All of a sudden the robbers circled back and threw back their wallets (minus the cash). My friends proceeded to thank them and wave goodbye like they were all besties. You couldn't have scripted it better.
Shane listening 2 the Shaman like a proud comedy lil bro
Nothin lil about him lil Swartz 😂
"It's what you're supposed to clean your wall with."
Great contribution Jamie.
Actually, that legit gave me an idea to clean my walls 😂
He was cluing them in since none of them have cleaned a wall ever
Love Matt getting time
Matt & Shane would be the best dudes on Earth to share a blunt with.
* drink some Budweisers with
@@ls_812 *bud light
I could think of a lot better
budlight*
@@cjnv48 who? Cares. Lol shut the fuck up
Great segment!!!
Oh boy. Wish I could watch this entire episode on yt.
Lmao Shane comparing favelas to fallout
hey handsome , you look fantastic in your pic. have a good day sweetie ❤
Matt said that
Matt pulled a Ron Swanson trying to pay with US currency in a foreign country.
Man said City of God makes Boyz in the hood look like Sesame Street 😂 Goated film
Given the new contract, when can we expect full episodes back on CZcams?
Matt has been watching that Reacher season 1 lmao
A few years ago when weed first became legal I was pulling up to a dispensary and a guy jumped out of the bushes and demanded my money as he drew a Bowie knife and pointed it at me as he walked towards me. Not skipping a beat I pulled my .40 cal out and said not today, looked down and noticed he had in a nice pair of Jordan’s, asked his shoe size and wouldn’t you know it was 11, same as mine. I got his shoes off him, got some legal fire, and laughed my ass off all the way home.
Sure
The ending was classic Joes ability to always miss the joke will never not be funny
I just have to put this out there Jefferey tubin yelling “Mexico” 😂
I have a friend who had his jacket pocket cut in a club in Rio he noticed when he put his hand inside 😂
Morning muggers are the nicest in my experience! Ha
"A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the doctor's book.”
These are the best!!! Clips and natural pcasts. Thank you hoejoe. For getting all this info out. This episode was more NEWS THAN 2 WEEKS of watching real news😊 scary
Getting robbed is an interesting social interaction
Rogan just announced that the pod is no longer spotify exclusive
I was on a meme-site a while back and they used to allow morbid shit from time to time; usually they wouldn't put a warning so you're just scrolling through memes and jokes and BOOM somebody getting murdered. One of the clips was out of Brazil, a little boy, probably ten or eleven walks up to a drug dealer asking to see the dude's gun. Dude pulls the gun and blasts the young boy right in the fucken' face. I didn't want to see that but now I have. The other sick part is that dealer must have uploaded that clip to the internet.
The top 2 podcasts collide
Podcast allstars
I graduated in 84 we got to go to Hawaii. Back in 84 drinking age was17 there so me and my buddy basically ditched our girlfriends to bar hop we asked a local where to score weed he said go to this street there is a guy selling hats tell him you are looking. So we went got a 60 bag all exited we went back to the room to roll some up and it was fuckin seaweed. We jammed back over there his little set up was gone lololol another local told us they do it all day everyday from you graduates. It sucked but a funny memory.
I live in Brazil, and the thing is most coutries got rough neighborhoods with all kinds of people, and even in Brazil people outside of the state of Rio and its capital also named Rio tend to think that it's quite dangerous in the favelas. We have a lot of them in Sao Paulo and in all of the other states, but the thing that most differentiate if the types of criminal factions. In Rio, you are in a nice avenue and if you are using just a GPS or you're trying to guess where to go, suddenly from one street to another, you are in the middle of a favela. In Sao Paulo I think that the favelas are easier to avoid when you don't want to go straight into it. You basicaly must want to go to one of them to end up in the middle of them, but in Rio you have everything so mixed up that you need to have someone who knows the city to kind of guide you. If you avoid those rough places, you are as fine as driving through a big city of any country, just pay attention, which is something that you need to do in most coutries' big cities as well, with few exceptions of, I don't know, Switzerland? lol But you have a lot of favelas in all coutries of latin america. I think that they just change the name, but there are some sort of favelas in the middle east, asia and other places, just with different cultures. I would say that San Francisco is slowly turning into a north american version of rio, looking from outside of the USA, things are getting weird there as well... and all things start with politics. When the coutry's politicians are constantly making f'd up decisions, you turn everything upside down in a short period of time...
I was walking to another Bar in the Middle of the night in Rio de Janeiro bar areas with some french friends, a car pulled up to us and clocked a gun once they pulled down the window, they said “ voce va morir oi” which means we were dying thar night, luckily we ran in different directions at the same time in a heartbeat which i think saved us from being robbed or dead
I loved the old art style of currency but, because the portraits were the same size they were easier to counterfeit. Now the newer bills have the regular watermark but, also have that plastic strip in it; which is in different places for each denomination.
Gotta get a former counterfeiter on JRE. There were some great ones (until they got caught lol) and I’m sure there’s some still so great they never will be caught
Sounds like Matt is describing season 1 of Reacher
The reason for the “New” blue strip hundreds, is because the old ones were counterfeit so good they had to change it
@@TyChaff I’m surprised Rogan never had any former counterfeiters on the show. There’s a bunch of pretty talented ones, granted I’m sure the best ones we’ll never hear about bc they don’t get caught...
Mike and his entourage tried to bypass the weapons scanners and pushed a guard
wow...thats such a wholesome experience(for a robbery lol). i wish if i ever get robbed, it exactly like that tho
Shane Gillis is the Killer Mike of Comedy.
nobody knows who that it lil bro
@@realbosstakea Even funnier is who the fook is you? 🤣 Act like you don't know kid.
@@realbosstakeathey talk about killer mike in this clip
Lol no they were laughing at you home boy not just the book 😂
Many decades ago, I worked for a paper company. The currency is not paper it is made from cotton fibers and if I recall correctly (it has been 40 years) the supplier was Cranes. The Secret Service would come in every so often to inspect our records for the printers that were buying Cranes paper.
What do you think the point of the secret service was to inspect the printers. Did they take photos or anything.
I remember walking into a buddies place in the 90's and having a bale tossed at me as i walked through the door. it was a bale of counterfeit cash. i was not amused.
Honor among thieves lmfao
Dude made getting robbed in Brazil seem like a destination excursion I gotta try😅
“Killer Mike” means two things his name and “kill a mic” it use to be spelled different.
My ex gf and I went to the Dominican Republic with a group of 3 other couples and stayed at a resort in puerto plata for a wedding and on the drive to the resort from the airport in our limo we had a group of kids swarm the car at a stop light . They were asking for money and when my friends wife put her hand out of the window with a few dollars the kids tried to take her engagement ring off of her hand. We yelled to the driver and he to,d us to stay in the car while he jumped out with his gun and the kids let go then scattered .
During our two weeks there every time we had to go through town to do one of the many day trips to scuba dive or other activities we noticed our drivers were all armed. It’s just a different world there. The same girl who almost had her engagement ring stolen also had her bank card skimmed at one of the places she made purchases and lost $4000 stolen.
I stayed by myself in a favela Chapeu Mangueira in Rio de Janeiro front of Copacabana, surreal survival experience for 9 days, of beautiful sights and experiences and near dead experiences luckily unscathed by then, but near death experiences nonetheless in and out the area.
Why in the heck you guys go the favelas?
Is like a tourist going to Chicago and staying in the O Block.
Chael was spot on...
City of god is amazing.
Hear hear!
STL area. A buddy that manages a liquor store just told me about a memo he got about counterfeits in the area. What he told me was exactly what was said about bleaching bills.
😂😂😂 cool way to get robbed 😂
@7:53 😂😂
Check also the films "Tropa d'elite" and "Carandiru".
Bible paper is the go to ive heard
Back when I was 21, I was visiting some friends in high school that had moved to San Diego. We had left a club that night, so it’s probably 1:30am at this point. It was our friends 21st birthday so we had dressed like dweebs with ties and collar shirts and what not. Once we get back to his house I wanted to go to a 24 hr taqueria. No one wanted to go with, so I walked out at around 2 am to get a burrito. On my way back while on the phone with my then girlfriend, who was not with us in San Diego, I got surrounded by 3 guys. They demanded all my things and really all I had was my phone, empty wallet and my burrito. They were visibly frustrated, I think, because the tie and shirt probably made it look like I had been a better mark than they thought. The 2 guys behind me, were pressing the guy in front, presumably the leader, to ‘beat my ass’ I pleaded with them not to beat me up because I was from across the state and didn’t have any medical insurance, so if they beat me up my life would be so so fucked. They ended up leaving me alone and I gave them my burrito as a thank you. I’m sure they were pissed as fuck when they ate it or tried to at least because it was made with beef tongue as the meat choice 😂
Lengua 🤌🏼🤌🏼🤌🏼
Shane can be stupidly patriotic and i love that. Im the same about my home Australia too aww fark lewk owt! Nyooooooo!
I respect people's dumb patriotism morr than I do some pseudo intellectual whining about their own country. Cheers 🍻
My friend got robbed at gun point, they stole his Iphone, took the SIM card out, and gave it back to him with a Nokia 3360 for him to "get by" 😂😂😂
Joe needs to get a counterfeiter on JRE. It’s about time. It’d be even better if he found a mastermind who never was caught but all the big ones we know about have served years for it already
Dude that’s like self Incriminating get outta here with that
Got to watch comedian Brad Williams talk about when he got robbed in Brazil.
Yo how did he know so much about counterfeit 😂
Best counterfeiting story ever is this dude from Quebec that printed $250,000,000 of US $20 bills that were basically perfect. Frank Bourassa. He's the guest on Darknet Diaries Ep 102 and he's a fantastic story teller.
im from rio and live in canada.. the worse part for me is buying weed there...
I'm from the US and living in Mexico, you aren't lying. I never felt sketchy buying weed, even when it was illegal in the US some guy with long greasy hair would come in your house and weigh it for you. In Mexico I had specific instructions and three sketchy guys came out of the house to ask me questions 😂
Great show guys....but buckets of Mulvaney juice on the table?
I alsways assumed it was a double to Kill a mic ??? Have i been that wrong this whole time?
I think some other countries don't like to except American money during business transaction because it takes so much of theirs to make change for the American big bills
"American money is all that matters." Laughs in Pounds Sterling
Obnoxious American viewpoint.
What was the name of that movie they were talking about??
City of God
Had a guy try to rob me at gunpoint during my gas station graveyard shift. Ended with him in an ambulance with two holes in him, plus he just got sentenced to 10 years 🤙
Something similar happened to me in Paris
I was in Amsterdam when a guy asked if I wanted to buy some coke. We went to the atm, but my card wasn't working. He wanted 100 euros, I told him all I had was 150 USD. He kept on refusing, even tho I'm like this is a lot more than what your asking for.
3:50
Cool fact: American dollars aren't made from paper, its a cotton based cloth.
There’s a CZcamsr Kurt Katz that was in the favella and all sudden a gun shot from a semi automatic went off and they had to take cover.
Joes right on the ride from the airport, there’s people in the middle of the highway selling crap when there’s a traffic jame.
Selling crap?
WTF
The dude in the favela was smiling. Imagine him in a real shootout in the favelas. He would be rolling and screaming.
Being a dinner thief sucks.
Are we just going to ignore the fact that the Will slap was a reenactment from an early Hollywood film??... crazy world.
They've made a stage and found a eager audience
You got played. Look into it. That skit was made after the Oscars
Sometimes culture plays a big part in understanding, they thinking of Killer Mike, When its supposed to be viewed as Kill a Mic
Have you seen Portland?
Killer mike is a GOAT.
He's a racïst
3:18 if they did you would not know. it's completely accurate..
Yep
Brazilians are some of the kindest people on earth. I’m marrying one! 😅
I agree! My wife is Brazilian and she is the nicest person I have ever met. Everyday is the best! Congratulations
@@rc13069696 Brazilian women are the goat of all women 🙌
Shane plays fallout…A DAWGGG😤😤
British paper currency has ultraviolet numbers and multiple 3d holograms to prevent counterfeits. It is super hard to replicate. 1 in 30'000 British notes is still counterfeit though but not too hard to spot if you know what to look for. A few I've seen are really excellent though. Ps bit of trivia -The bank of England's highest note is £100'000'000 called a titan.
No one carries cash in Brazil, when you go there dress like a beach bum. It all depends on where you go as well. Met the most incredible people there in south Brazil.
South Brazils awesome. Anything north of Sao Paulo, not so much.
The opposite, I hear it's better to carry a little cash to let them rob you of, you don't want a pissed off robber.
@jackxiao9702 depends on what part of the country, time of day. I didn't see anyone use cash one time when I was there never had any reas on me one time. I was told use credit cards for everything.
@@NotKimiRaikkonen Salvador is an amazing place. I am white as glue and had no problems. Just don't be stupid.
I don’t want to go anywhere wherein I have to dress and act a certain way so i don’t get robbed at knife point in some shit hole third word country.
City of god was such a good film that I don’t remember being in subtitles
I can tell you that the subtitled version don’t translate the vibe. Imagine watching as a local. It was mind blowing.
The reason they were nice to you is because the mpney in your pocket is theirs but the money in your shoe is yours. So they knew you were really down bad to give them the money in your shoe lol.
3 old ass grown men dont realize counterfeit money doesnt last long cuz the real bills clearly have serial numbers
It’s nothing older successful people need to worry about. Only younger people, pulling stupid moves to lift a few hundred bucks for their next short sighted moves in life.
Just think, these are the types we’re inviting into the country
This comment makes no sense at all.
A kid tried to rob me once, I had nothing on me, he pistol whipped me and ran
Killer Mike As In Mic Killer . He's A Rapper
I got robbed at knifepoint by a gang of teenagers in Venezuela. They were not nice.
Put the comic’s name in the title
You can absolutely buy the paper money is made from, just not the printer or inks, unless your Wozniak some how
Being from Rio I laugh at the gringo perceptions of Brazil in general. If you are smart and safe, most people have no issues visiting there.
What’s not safe about a walk on the beach?
I saw a white CZcamsr get beat up and robbed on the beach in Rio in broad daylight in front of hundreds of people. He was just minding his business. Place is a dump
This is such a cope. I've lived and a few LATAM countries. In Mexico they tell you, don't go there, don't do this at night, don't say these words. Nothing happened to me the years I lived there. In Columbia, same thing, if a lady tells you to go back home with her say no. Lived less than a year in Columbia no problem. I spent 3 months in Brazil and I got robbed at gun point leaving my gated rental 😂 then got robbed another 5 times after.
LMAO, damn I lived there for 25 years and never had a problem and most friends and family I know are OK as well. Yes, we have many cases of violence but again, my point is if you are aware of your surroundings, you should be fine. Are we Switzerland? no way but in many places in the US are as dangerous if you don't take precautions. @@SuperVladamere
@@THE_MZAat sunrise? In Rio? Plenty.
That's one city, tho.
I've been living in Brazil for over 10 years and I never had anything bad happen to me.
But I notice that there're usually 3 types of tourists. The 1st is the one who listens. The 2nd is the one that listen becomes paranoid and has a horrible time because they are unable to relax. The 3rd is the one with common sense.
Joe taking Shane seriously when he says he can’t watch football anymore cause of Taylor swift is hilarious
His fake ahhhhh laugh irks me
If your spending money with locals they will not trouble you, plus the Favelas are safer to walk round than San Francisco
shouldn’t have to buy stuff for bums to avoid being robbed lmao same diff
"I got bullied in Brazil"
i can’t even watch the games anymore cuz it like cuts to her once or twice and i’m like, MF 😂😂
Remember this guy has a 250 million dollar contract
At 4 min 13 we are taught how to make fake money...
This is way better than school house rock
Shitcans Australian Dollars because of the security features that far exceed usd features then proceeds to explain how usd is counterfeitable.