I'm recovering from nice guy syndrome. Most nice guys are a victim of the current society telling them to be nice and/or not having a father figure when growing up.
Your "happiness" is your responsibility. Satisfaction in the bedroom should be shared with your partner, you should want to make sure they are satisfied...otherwise you can have sex with yourself. Thank you for sharing.
I've been both the nice guy and the jerk, one is no better than the other, I've also had the good girl and the so call hot girl, now being 60yrs old If I could do it all over again, I'd take the good nice girl , the problem is that society here is too hyper sexual and base our relationships off of how good the sex is, and just deal with the other toxic behaviors.
I also have been the good girl and the jerk, I admit it! But I have always been clear with communicating to my partner and paying attention to body language. Sex is a natural part of a healthy relationship, and it can be a deal breaker because problems in the bedroom can lead to outside issues due to poor communication and a lack of desire to give the best of yourself to your partner. I see being a pleaser isn't natural from the comments but when I'm 60 I still plan to flirt with my man and make him feel like he's the most desirable man in the world. This is just how I think and act in real life. Thank you for sharing!
Women need to stop using the word settle. Just about all men settle when they choose a woman. Too many women think they offer more to a man than they actually do.
I can only speak for myself but I don't settle for anything...I strive for success in my personal and professional life. I aim to please my partner in and out of the bedroom. I believe life is what you make it and it can be great if you put in the effort. Settling is not for everyone but I do believe the average person is content with settling more than you realize. Thank you for sharing!
@HelenaPaschal Everybody Settles.Even You.That's The Whole point Settling upon Something.Nobody is better than anyone.Evetybody breathe the same Air.And so The same Bodily Functions.
@@heruapocalypse2021 Thank you! She needs to understand that! After all from her own mouth, you can't have it all! Damn, what a contradiction! That's why most women are unhappy - even Ms Paschal...Even if women do get it all, they still won't be satisfied!
Very good topic! In my opinion as a man your focus is on your woman! Talking to her; kissing her passionately; watching her reaction (in case you do something she doesn’t like)…..but above all else….communicate your likes/dislikes. This gets most of us in trouble because that’s a very hard topic because it’s not about “me” telling her what my feelings are, but me “listening” and respecting her feelings as well. There is so much more to this…..and lastly….a man that goes straight to “sex” without intimacy is selfish……and is uncomfortable with his lovemaking abilities…..in my humble opinion! Thank you for your awesome work!!!🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
We must teach our spouses what we need from each other. Marriage and relationships require time to learn each other. As a married man of almost 29 years me and my wife have grown through communication in our needs and wants inside and outside of the bedroom. How is the other person to know what we need if we don’t communicate. How can a teacher test students on information that they have not learned or been taught ?
I agree with you. When I was much younger, teaching and learning each other was natural. But to be expected to walk a grown man through the basics of taking his time and kissing and when he's not willing to change, it's not worth it. Communication takes two people who are willing to share their wants/needs, listen, and improve. If only one person is talking, there is no communication, and you need to be mature enough to kindly walk away when it's not going anywhere. Congratulations on 29 years of love, patience, and understanding. Thank you for watching!
I agree. I also believe partners should pay attention to body language and seek to please each other. I value communication and I expressed my wants but he didn't care. Thank you for watching!
I’m either a good guy or a nice guy or both. I’m definitely not attractive to Instagram models. Those are definitely not the same women you see walking around in real life. Give me a plane Jane. At least I know who I’m waking up to every morning. I do think that age can play a certain role in experience, expectations, and acceptance. Hopefully there’s more between the two persons than sex to maybe work on those shortcomings. Some people may have patience, others may not. There is also a difference between dating sex, and long-term relation sex. When a woman have had tons of experience of sexual partners, and meet someone who does not, yes there could be some issues. That doesn’t mean a guy that doesn’t have that many partners should go out and gain more experience. Just find a woman with less experience, and learn together. My ex-wife brother has been with the same woman since high school. They are all each other know. I’ve been celibate for a few years before my current partner, and it took awhile to get back into it. She didn’t run, she saw more value in me, and we are very open about those conversations, so that’s how we grew.
LOL!!! Seeeee, there you go trying to get me in trouble! I didn't say "who"...I'm trying to protect the innocent. I should've married 2 men in my life and I'll leave it at that.
good afternoon, helena i like your topics for i 2 am a NICE GUY but, i have learned the HARD WAY in life and it has made me a SHARPER person in general
Excellent topic Ms. Helena and one all young men should have. If you weren't devilishly handsome early on or charismatic, you as a man will have to get the experience somewhere. Otherwise it can get bloody figuratively speaking. If the woman doesn't absolutely love you, she won't be patient or understanding and will punish you.
I understand your point and it is definitely a conversation worth having. I agree with you. I have personally been more forgiving for men that I find more attractive and I also know that I have gotten away with murder from men who find me desirable. Attraction plays a major role and to pretend like it doesn't matter won't get you too far. My humble opinion. Thank you for sharing as always. You are appreciated!
As builders and problem solvers, we men like to take a 'Plain Jane' and turn them to our liking. It's like a *Created Player* in a video game. We've been playing with G.I.Joe toys since we were toddlers. It's much more difficult for a woman to do the 'Build a N&&A' thing. Upon meeting my wife, I started to buy her clothes, jewelry, cars e.t.c and she's a very good mother. The flip side is she can't shut her mouth to save her life with her confidence, haha. This was an over 30 year process. What problem solving man what's an IG model he can't mold.
The I.G. model isn't the block. She's the statue. The process you cite is meant to bring you closer. If she reframes it as a shallow motivation, she can run away with her better self once she arrives.
GM Beautiful, I don't think people have to compromise, because compromising don't mean you going to get what you want. You know they're people out here for everyone, but I believe you should have the conversation about what you like and be honest about it before you have a relationship. You see I learned a long time ago about the Love language, and I believe that factor go a long way. About the good guy we have been saying it so much that it has been passed down through generations and it has a curse for man kind. You know how many of us has asked God for our spouses. I believe if we just ask him he will lead that person across our path. About having bad sex. I think the young man you mentioned was to excited or selfish, but you should always have foreplay it makes love making very exciting. Just my opinion.
Helana, this is good conversation. I agree with most of what you said. Good sex/loving is a priority for many women regardless of what some men may think. Pookie and Ray Ray can be more a tuned with a woman's emotions because he has lots of time available. A man on top of his game, God, family, money, job, passion, enjoys sex too but his priority is building a good life. It's the age old question for women, do you want the attentive man that gives you time and is a tuned to most your needs but that means he's home quite often and probably not earning as much financially? Or do you want the guy who wants to work so you can have the option to stay home and give you a very good life but you likely won't get most of his time? A combination of both is possible but not very likely. You said it though, some people want it all but in reality, none of us can have it all. It's about compromise and deciding what's important to you as an individual. I believe men should be "kind" and not "nice". As far sex goes, one of the biggest lies men have been told and many still believe is that she doesn't think about or want sex as much as a guy and only 304s like "exciting" in the bedroom. Good girls don't do nasty things. Fellas, most women will do it all and they love it! Many women want to be treated delicate everywhere except the bedroom. Every man needs a couple female best friends and you'll find out a lot of things. It will make you better man but abouve all you need to be around "men" with experience to keep you on task. As far as less or no bodies, it may depend on the dude but my friends and I prefer a woman with some type of experience. When we discussed it, the consensus was she mine now, i don't care how she learned, but I like it and I'm going to enjoy it! I just wouldn't want the lady that everyone has or has had access to or I have to see those other guys or they have to see me in close proximity.
Thank you for your break down, I appreciate it. If I had to personally answer the questions you posed, I would say I want a guy who understands body language. It doesn't take time away from work or other responsibilities to be in tune with the desires of your partner. I'm a pleaser and it would be mutually beneficial to have a man as interested in satisfying our basic needs in and out of the bedroom. Thank you for sharing!
Me, too! I understand how you feel. You have to raise your standards and be okay with walking away from people who don't respect or celebrate you. Thank you for sharing!
I agree. This guy needs to be more assertive and stand up for himself and look after himself more. The people who are not reciprocating will either take notice or either away.
There's always "reasons". What you need to know is that sooner or later, she'll give you that reason. And at that point she's already sleeping with another man, or she's on her way to doing exactly that.
What women think is plain is sometimes hot to men and vice versa. I would like a dollar for every time a woman I know has described one of her friend or associate as beautiful, stunning when they are at best average.
I’m just gonna say, I’m not a nice guy, I’m good person. To me there’s a difference, only men can be nice guys, but anyone can choose to be a good person I wish you a great day, Ms. Helena
Thank you for the differentiation and not falling back on the lame “Pookie and RayRay” verbiage. Every bad guy isn’t a Pookie and I feel that people who use that are alluding to blaming women for making poor choices while not holding men accountable. My biggest abusers were so called “educated lames”. My husband is a good guy, but he isn’t a “nice” guy. There is a difference.
My prior post didn't address *'Reason Women Leave Nice Guys'.* That's easy. The reason? No excitement, no ups and downs, and no life movement. A woman's brain is constantly running and we men have to keep them stimulated. Money is nice but it gets old quickly. Only when a woman has children, does they want more stability.
Nice guys are probably someone who needs more practice & patience from their wife with open communication. With the hook up culture most of that goes out the window. Once you commit to someone you stop looking around considering other options. All relationship require true commitment patience, devotion & love.. True Love will endure challenges, difficulties, & doesn't seek its own. Today our society is totally misguided & corrupted.
I'm a nice guy but changing to a good guy. I know romance and know that it's a thing women need. However I know that my issues are I'm not one to be going out all the time or wasting money so that could make me not someone's cup of tea and learning to deal with it. I have heard women say that before because they cheated on nice men who gave them all they wanted but they wanted more and that's what the Pookie or Ray offers. Another reason why I've given up dating for awhile.
Yes, that's a different topic all together...wasting time and money. I can go on and on about that. I'm mainly addressing if men pay attention to body language? I didn't realize until reading the comments that people don't realize that body language is a form of communication. If she's not responding or satisfied... that's a problem. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
@@HelenaPaschal yeah that's something that can be obvious and overlooked as well. It's easier to see it in hindsight than in the moment. As a bit of an overthinker that happens were either I'm thinking I'm doing too much and she doesn't like it or not enough and she'll leave.
You still didn’t handle that right in my opinion. How about a conversation and telling him what you like? Leaving was not the answer in this case. Tell him what you want. You have to learn a person. Everybody can’t be pleased the same way. You have to talk about sex just like everything else. It’s gets better over time
There was communication before, during, and after. He was not open to making any changes. If you don't see anything wrong with jumping straight in with no intentions of satisfying your partner, you would NEVER understand. I didn't realize men think this is normal. Thank you for watching!
No, I understand completely. It’s not about jumping in without the intent of pleasing your partner. It’s about patience and working to please each other. There are some things you need to know about men. First of all, when a man has not had sex in a while, there is a strong likelihood that he will have a quick orgasm. That’s where patience comes in and you do your job to get him back up if you know what I mean. You gave up to quickly. I’m telling you, the second and third rounds of sex is the best sex. Trust me. Men last longer!!!
I find that it is a lot easier and feels more natural being a bit of an asshole than a nice guy. Women tend yo have a bit of a laugh about and seem to like it. It makes me sick watching men being non-genuinely and overly nice yo women, especially ones that they don’t have a relationship that she has earned his respect. I can see why this could turn women off.
The body count thing is not about experience, a woman is more valuable to us the less body count she has. Most of us men don't want to be with a woman who has been with every John on the block, that takes always the feeling of being with someone special pure. We should be able to brag about the woman we are with.
I understand that. Women also don’t want a man that other women have run through either. My question is if you don’t want a woman with experience do you expect her to know what it takes to satisfy you?
@@HelenaPaschal Hi, thank you for your response and question. Men in general is not hard to please at all, further more most men like myself sees it as our duty to make the fireworks in the bedroom, sending our women to another galaxy and back, being the champion performer. So on the woman's side no experience is required. But don't get me wrong, some men love what they call a " bad B", a woman that can work wonders intimately, but most men don't care about that. Love your channel BTW, I am a new sub, I am in love with your honesty and integrity, please continue to keep it coming.
@HelenaPaschal You committed what I would call a fatal mistake relationship wise that so many women just like you do (and can't see the trap ) You are a prime example why a woman should be a Virgin before. She gets married your not the only one Your sexual experience or experiences with other men DOOMED you from landing your husband .you have experiences alright with the wrong men And it cost you big time Alot of women tend to look at men as lottery tickets you had yours and blew it How many people you know played the lottery and hit the jackpot not once but twice ? I probably could write a small book on this Iam about to go in Let's say the man you was suppose to marry he checked 9 out of 10 boxes that one box he did not check you was out the door Which tells me you did not really love him like that or turn on by him or even turnt up by him To begin with .it was what you can get if you was to marry him (It's never about you) or women in general He dodge a bullet You was expecting your first sexual experience with him to be 5 star steak and potatoes type of experience And when he gave you a pinto beans and rice experience 2 minute man ( you was out)very foolish And when he told you we going to do it again later you gave him a side eye You could of told him a few things down the road how to please you sexually and see if he was willing to try You didn't do that A man is turnt off when a woman says she experience( why ) With all the experience why aren't you with them guys ? you have the wrong experiences don't matter how good it was to you Understand ? Have you came closed to another guy you wanted to marry ? Do you have children ? If you do let me guess it came from a man that please you sexually Why didn't you marry him ? Do you see the trap Them same women past the age of 35+ asking were the good men at. easy you didn't want him he long gone .and dating forget about it Women think they can have it all relationships don't work like that even marriages its always a compromise you never get 100% Of the things you want in a mate Imagine if you was in a classroom the teacher give the students a pop quiz you get a C on the test and because you got a C instead of And A you was kicked out the class and course for good never got another opportunity to redeem yourself In essence that's what you did And alot of women tend to do Iam going to stop right there I have plenty more on this subject
There is a lot to comment on, I agree! You very attractive, my type to be honest, I love the short hair! Now that I got that out the way as an much older man I am comfortable with myself, I have found that over the years I am not from mars!😂 I love to please in the bedroom!!! I have been with women who seem not into it, but never long term! I married a woman who changed became, let say not into it, so I lived with it. That is the plight of marriage!! Being a pleaser I am not opposed to being with a woman who knows what she wants and needs I am open to you telling me if I am not hitting that spot!😂
The lack of foreplay and understanding shared communication was very lacking in the story. It was counterproductive because it was a lack of expressing your displeasure. Take account as to what his experience and mindset level was when it came to sexual intimacy and pleasing a woman. It sounded like it was just very little and one-sided but I could've easily been expressed if this was someone that was worth giving the chance to learn. This is an example of how people have bad viewpoints and expectations of people based on assuming they're aware of your desires. It was obvious that you had a preference of engagement and was turned off. There was more to the sudden checkout out of the one-time occurrence. It could've had a chance at saving with a nice in-bed intimate nude pillow talk. Just don't think you saw him worth the chance to see it through to progress overall. It wasn't bad because he was a nice guy, more so just fell out of interest.
It was a 9 min video but for context there was a lot of communication and 'dirty talk' from him about all the things he wanted to do and on the day of, he jumped right in and didn't do anything he said he would. I was disappointed. During the 3 mins, I communicated --"I like when you take it slow..." "I love when you keep kissing me" etc, etc, etc...he was not open to suggestions or improvements. In fact, he thought he didn't need to change anything. You can communicate all you want but if someone isn't willing to receive it, what should you do? I made a decision to move on because you're right, poor communication is a major problem...it led to a ton of other issues in the relationship. Thank you for watching!
This sounds like a classic, hit it and quit it on his behalf. This guy was probably not empathetic, so he only needed a release to feel satisfied. The fact that he didn't feel a need to correct his approach speaks volume!
I'm recovering from nice guy syndrome.
Most nice guys are a victim of the current society telling them to be nice and/or not having a father figure when growing up.
You will have a much better life and relationships if you are more assertive.
Your "satisfaction" is your responsibility, communication with your partner is key.
Your "happiness" is your responsibility. Satisfaction in the bedroom should be shared with your partner, you should want to make sure they are satisfied...otherwise you can have sex with yourself. Thank you for sharing.
@@HelenaPaschalexactly. It is more than just communication to fix that poor performance.
I've been both the nice guy and the jerk, one is no better than the other, I've also had the good girl and the so call hot girl, now being 60yrs old If I could do it all over again, I'd take the good nice girl , the problem is that society here is too hyper sexual and base our relationships off of how good the sex is, and just deal with the other toxic behaviors.
I also have been the good girl and the jerk, I admit it! But I have always been clear with communicating to my partner and paying attention to body language. Sex is a natural part of a healthy relationship, and it can be a deal breaker because problems in the bedroom can lead to outside issues due to poor communication and a lack of desire to give the best of yourself to your partner. I see being a pleaser isn't natural from the comments but when I'm 60 I still plan to flirt with my man and make him feel like he's the most desirable man in the world. This is just how I think and act in real life. Thank you for sharing!
Women need to stop using the word settle. Just about all men settle when they choose a woman. Too many women think they offer more to a man than they actually do.
I can only speak for myself but I don't settle for anything...I strive for success in my personal and professional life. I aim to please my partner in and out of the bedroom. I believe life is what you make it and it can be great if you put in the effort. Settling is not for everyone but I do believe the average person is content with settling more than you realize. Thank you for sharing!
@HelenaPaschal Everybody Settles.Even You.That's The Whole point Settling upon Something.Nobody is better than anyone.Evetybody breathe the same Air.And so The same Bodily Functions.
@@heruapocalypse2021 Thank you! She needs to understand that! After all from her own mouth, you can't have it all! Damn, what a contradiction! That's why most women are unhappy - even Ms Paschal...Even if women do get it all, they still won't be satisfied!
Very good topic! In my opinion as a man your focus is on your woman! Talking to her; kissing her passionately; watching her reaction (in case you do something she doesn’t like)…..but above all else….communicate your likes/dislikes. This gets most of us in trouble because that’s a very hard topic because it’s not about “me” telling her what my feelings are, but me “listening” and respecting her feelings as well. There is so much more to this…..and lastly….a man that goes straight to “sex” without intimacy is selfish……and is uncomfortable with his lovemaking abilities…..in my humble opinion! Thank you for your awesome work!!!🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
Hello sir. I hope you are well. Are married or in a long term relationship?
We must teach our spouses what we need from each other. Marriage and relationships require time to learn each other. As a married man of almost 29 years me and my wife have grown through communication in our needs and wants inside and outside of the bedroom. How is the other person to know what we need if we don’t communicate. How can a teacher test students on information that they have not learned or been taught ?
I agree with you. When I was much younger, teaching and learning each other was natural. But to be expected to walk a grown man through the basics of taking his time and kissing and when he's not willing to change, it's not worth it. Communication takes two people who are willing to share their wants/needs, listen, and improve. If only one person is talking, there is no communication, and you need to be mature enough to kindly walk away when it's not going anywhere. Congratulations on 29 years of love, patience, and understanding. Thank you for watching!
I think that communication is important between partners. Sharing your likes and dislikes as well as your wants and don't want.
I agree. I also believe partners should pay attention to body language and seek to please each other. I value communication and I expressed my wants but he didn't care. Thank you for watching!
I am not a black guy but Zi find your videos refreshingly straight-forward and un-pretentious.
I’m either a good guy or a nice guy or both. I’m definitely not attractive to Instagram models. Those are definitely not the same women you see walking around in real life. Give me a plane Jane. At least I know who I’m waking up to every morning. I do think that age can play a certain role in experience, expectations, and acceptance. Hopefully there’s more between the two persons than sex to maybe work on those shortcomings. Some people may have patience, others may not. There is also a difference between dating sex, and long-term relation sex. When a woman have had tons of experience of sexual partners, and meet someone who does not, yes there could be some issues. That doesn’t mean a guy that doesn’t have that many partners should go out and gain more experience. Just find a woman with less experience, and learn together. My ex-wife brother has been with the same woman since high school. They are all each other know. I’ve been celibate for a few years before my current partner, and it took awhile to get back into it. She didn’t run, she saw more value in me, and we are very open about those conversations, so that’s how we grew.
Not the Pilot 😳😳🙈🙈😂😂😂😂
LOL!!! Seeeee, there you go trying to get me in trouble! I didn't say "who"...I'm trying to protect the innocent. I should've married 2 men in my life and I'll leave it at that.
…..must had trouble with his hydraulics.
good afternoon, helena i like your topics for i 2 am a NICE GUY but, i have learned the HARD WAY in life and it has made me a SHARPER person in general
Excellent topic Ms. Helena and one all young men should have. If you weren't devilishly handsome early on or charismatic, you as a man will have to get the experience somewhere. Otherwise it can get bloody figuratively speaking. If the woman doesn't absolutely love you, she won't be patient or understanding and will punish you.
I understand your point and it is definitely a conversation worth having. I agree with you. I have personally been more forgiving for men that I find more attractive and I also know that I have gotten away with murder from men who find me desirable. Attraction plays a major role and to pretend like it doesn't matter won't get you too far. My humble opinion. Thank you for sharing as always. You are appreciated!
Because they don't want them.
True
As builders and problem solvers, we men like to take a 'Plain Jane' and turn them to our liking. It's like a *Created Player* in a video game. We've been playing with G.I.Joe toys since we were toddlers. It's much more difficult for a woman to do the 'Build a N&&A' thing. Upon meeting my wife, I started to buy her clothes, jewelry, cars e.t.c and she's a very good mother. The flip side is she can't shut her mouth to save her life with her confidence, haha. This was an over 30 year process.
What problem solving man what's an IG model he can't mold.
The I.G. model isn't the block. She's the statue. The process you cite is meant to bring you closer. If she reframes it as a shallow motivation, she can run away with her better self once she arrives.
GM Beautiful, I don't think people have to compromise, because compromising don't mean you going to get what you want. You know they're people out here for everyone, but I believe you should have the conversation about what you like and be honest about it before you have a relationship. You see I learned a long time ago about the Love language, and I believe that factor go a long way. About the good guy we have been saying it so much that it has been passed down through generations and it has a curse for man kind. You know how many of us has asked God for our spouses. I believe if we just ask him he will lead that person across our path. About having bad sex. I think the young man you mentioned was to excited or selfish, but you should always have foreplay it makes love making very exciting. Just my opinion.
No no no. I like skilful and experienced women
Lol! Thank you for sharing!
Helana, this is good conversation. I agree with most of what you said. Good sex/loving is a priority for many women regardless of what some men may think. Pookie and Ray Ray can be more a tuned with a woman's emotions because he has lots of time available. A man on top of his game, God, family, money, job, passion, enjoys sex too but his priority is building a good life. It's the age old question for women, do you want the attentive man that gives you time and is a tuned to most your needs but that means he's home quite often and probably not earning as much financially? Or do you want the guy who wants to work so you can have the option to stay home and give you a very good life but you likely won't get most of his time?
A combination of both is possible but not very likely. You said it though, some people want it all but in reality, none of us can have it all. It's about compromise and deciding what's important to you as an individual.
I believe men should be "kind" and not "nice". As far sex goes, one of the biggest lies men have been told and many still believe is that she doesn't think about or want sex as much as a guy and only 304s like "exciting" in the bedroom. Good girls don't do nasty things. Fellas, most women will do it all and they love it! Many women want to be treated delicate everywhere except the bedroom. Every man needs a couple female best friends and you'll find out a lot of things. It will make you better man but abouve all you need to be around "men" with experience to keep you on task.
As far as less or no bodies, it may depend on the dude but my friends and I prefer a woman with some type of experience. When we discussed it, the consensus was she mine now, i don't care how she learned, but I like it and I'm going to enjoy it! I just wouldn't want the lady that everyone has or has had access to or I have to see those other guys or they have to see me in close proximity.
Thank you for your break down, I appreciate it. If I had to personally answer the questions you posed, I would say I want a guy who understands body language. It doesn't take time away from work or other responsibilities to be in tune with the desires of your partner. I'm a pleaser and it would be mutually beneficial to have a man as interested in satisfying our basic needs in and out of the bedroom. Thank you for sharing!
I'm always been nice but I get treated like I'm noting and I had it with everyone.
Me, too! I understand how you feel. You have to raise your standards and be okay with walking away from people who don't respect or celebrate you. Thank you for sharing!
I agree. This guy needs to be more assertive and stand up for himself and look after himself more. The people who are not reciprocating will either take notice or either away.
There's always "reasons". What you need to know is that sooner or later, she'll give you that reason. And at that point she's already sleeping with another man, or she's on her way to doing exactly that.
You're right, there are always reasons. Some are valid, some are not. Thank you for sharing!
What women think is plain is sometimes hot to men and vice versa. I would like a dollar for every time a woman I know has described one of her friend or associate as beautiful, stunning when they are at best average.
I’m just gonna say, I’m not a nice guy, I’m good person. To me there’s a difference, only men can be nice guys, but anyone can choose to be a good person
I wish you a great day, Ms. Helena
Thank you for the differentiation and not falling back on the lame “Pookie and RayRay” verbiage. Every bad guy isn’t a Pookie and I feel that people who use that are alluding to blaming women for making poor choices while not holding men accountable. My biggest abusers were so called “educated lames”. My husband is a good guy, but he isn’t a “nice” guy. There is a difference.
@@swvolleyball9137 sorry you suffered abuse
My prior post didn't address *'Reason Women Leave Nice Guys'.* That's easy. The reason? No excitement, no ups and downs, and no life movement. A woman's brain is constantly running and we men have to keep them stimulated. Money is nice but it gets old quickly. Only when a woman has children, does they want more stability.
Nice guys are probably someone who needs more practice & patience from their wife with open communication.
With the hook up culture most of that
goes out the window. Once you commit
to someone you stop looking around
considering other options. All relationship
require true commitment patience, devotion & love.. True Love will endure
challenges, difficulties, & doesn't seek its own. Today our society is totally misguided & corrupted.
I'm a nice guy but changing to a good guy. I know romance and know that it's a thing women need. However I know that my issues are I'm not one to be going out all the time or wasting money so that could make me not someone's cup of tea and learning to deal with it. I have heard women say that before because they cheated on nice men who gave them all they wanted but they wanted more and that's what the Pookie or Ray offers. Another reason why I've given up dating for awhile.
Yes, that's a different topic all together...wasting time and money. I can go on and on about that. I'm mainly addressing if men pay attention to body language? I didn't realize until reading the comments that people don't realize that body language is a form of communication. If she's not responding or satisfied... that's a problem. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
@@HelenaPaschal yeah that's something that can be obvious and overlooked as well. It's easier to see it in hindsight than in the moment. As a bit of an overthinker that happens were either I'm thinking I'm doing too much and she doesn't like it or not enough and she'll leave.
You still didn’t handle that right in my opinion. How about a conversation and telling him what you like? Leaving was not the answer in this case. Tell him what you want. You have to learn a person. Everybody can’t be pleased the same way. You have to talk about sex just like everything else. It’s gets better over time
There was communication before, during, and after. He was not open to making any changes. If you don't see anything wrong with jumping straight in with no intentions of satisfying your partner, you would NEVER understand. I didn't realize men think this is normal. Thank you for watching!
No, I understand completely. It’s not about jumping in without the intent of pleasing your partner. It’s about patience and working to please each other. There are some things you need to know about men. First of all, when a man has not had sex in a while, there is a strong likelihood that he will have a quick orgasm. That’s where patience comes in and you do your job to get him back up if you know what I mean. You gave up to quickly. I’m telling you, the second and third rounds of sex is the best sex. Trust me. Men last longer!!!
I find that it is a lot easier and feels more natural being a bit of an asshole than a nice guy. Women tend yo have a bit of a laugh about and seem to like it. It makes me sick watching men being non-genuinely and overly nice yo women, especially ones that they don’t have a relationship that she has earned his respect. I can see why this could turn women off.
The body count thing is not about experience, a woman is more valuable to us the less body count she has. Most of us men don't want to be with a woman who has been with every John on the block, that takes always the feeling of being with someone special pure. We should be able to brag about the woman we are with.
I understand that. Women also don’t want a man that other women have run through either. My question is if you don’t want a woman with experience do you expect her to know what it takes to satisfy you?
@@HelenaPaschal Hi, thank you for your response and question. Men in general is not hard to please at all, further more most men like myself sees it as our duty to make the fireworks in the bedroom, sending our women to another galaxy and back, being the champion performer. So on the woman's side no experience is required. But don't get me wrong, some men love what they call a " bad B", a woman that can work wonders intimately, but most men don't care about that. Love your channel BTW, I am a new sub, I am in love with your honesty and integrity, please continue to keep it coming.
@HelenaPaschal
You committed what I would call a fatal mistake relationship wise that so many women just like you do (and can't see the trap )
You are a prime example why a woman should be a Virgin before. She gets married your not the only one
Your sexual experience or experiences with other men
DOOMED you from landing your husband .you have experiences alright with the wrong men
And it cost you big time
Alot of women tend to look at men as lottery tickets you had yours and blew it
How many people you know played the lottery and hit the jackpot not once but twice ?
I probably could write a small book on this Iam about to go in
Let's say the man you was suppose to marry he checked 9 out of 10 boxes that one box he did not check you was out the door
Which tells me you did not really love him like that or turn on by him or even turnt up by him
To begin with .it was what you can get if you was to marry him
(It's never about you) or women in general
He dodge a bullet
You was expecting your first sexual experience with him to be 5 star steak and potatoes type of experience
And when he gave you a pinto beans and rice experience 2 minute man ( you was out)very foolish
And when he told you we going to do it again later you gave him a side eye
You could of told him a few things down the road how to please you sexually and see if he was willing to try
You didn't do that
A man is turnt off when a woman says she experience( why )
With all the experience why aren't you with them guys ? you have the wrong experiences don't matter how good it was to you
Understand ?
Have you came closed to another guy you wanted to marry ?
Do you have children ?
If you do let me guess it came from a man that please you sexually
Why didn't you marry him ?
Do you see the trap
Them same women past the age of 35+ asking were the good men at. easy you didn't want him he long gone .and dating forget about it
Women think they can have it all
relationships don't work like that even marriages its always a compromise you never get 100%
Of the things you want in a mate
Imagine if you was in a classroom the teacher give the students a pop quiz you get a C on the test and because you got a C instead of And A you was kicked out the class and course for good never got another opportunity to redeem yourself
In essence that's what you did
And alot of women tend to do
Iam going to stop right there I have plenty more on this subject
Men dont get ran through by women 😂@@HelenaPaschal
I’ve got the answer
There is a lot to comment on, I agree! You very attractive, my type to be honest, I love the short hair! Now that I got that out the way as an much older man I am comfortable with myself, I have found that over the years I am not from mars!😂 I love to please in the bedroom!!! I have been with women who seem not into it, but never long term! I married a woman who changed became, let say not into it, so I lived with it. That is the plight of marriage!! Being a pleaser I am not opposed to being with a woman who knows what she wants and needs I am open to you telling me if I am not hitting that spot!😂
Maybe his hat is getting in the way.
@@michaelbutler1557 hat comes off for FEMALES! Sir!
The lack of foreplay and understanding shared communication was very lacking in the story. It was counterproductive because it was a lack of expressing your displeasure. Take account as to what his experience and mindset level was when it came to sexual intimacy and pleasing a woman. It sounded like it was just very little and one-sided but I could've easily been expressed if this was someone that was worth giving the chance to learn. This is an example of how people have bad viewpoints and expectations of people based on assuming they're aware of your desires. It was obvious that you had a preference of engagement and was turned off. There was more to the sudden checkout out of the one-time occurrence. It could've had a chance at saving with a nice in-bed intimate nude pillow talk. Just don't think you saw him worth the chance to see it through to progress overall. It wasn't bad because he was a nice guy, more so just fell out of interest.
It was a 9 min video but for context there was a lot of communication and 'dirty talk' from him about all the things he wanted to do and on the day of, he jumped right in and didn't do anything he said he would. I was disappointed. During the 3 mins, I communicated --"I like when you take it slow..." "I love when you keep kissing me" etc, etc, etc...he was not open to suggestions or improvements. In fact, he thought he didn't need to change anything. You can communicate all you want but if someone isn't willing to receive it, what should you do? I made a decision to move on because you're right, poor communication is a major problem...it led to a ton of other issues in the relationship. Thank you for watching!
This sounds like a classic, hit it and quit it on his behalf. This guy was probably not empathetic, so he only needed a release to feel satisfied. The fact that he didn't feel a need to correct his approach speaks volume!
🙂👍
Jesus Christ 😄🤦🏿♂️
Yes, let us pray! Thank you for commenting!
I always choose more experienced women. Her body count doesn't really matter to me.