Purity Culture Lies

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  • čas přidán 8. 09. 2024

Komentáře • 109

  • @rockercaterrorencountered4924

    I HATE that "causing men to stumble" thing. They teach you that having sex outside of marriage is a sin and that you can never do it, and you agree. Then you innocently wear something a little revealing, or someone else in your church does, and they tell you that you'll cause men to lose their purity. I'm sorry, since when is it my problem if someone else sins by having lustful thought about me? And if they act in a sexual way towards me, that's a sin and a crime, which I'm doubly not responsible for. The lack of responsibility men have in the church is staggering.

    • @kelleym7623
      @kelleym7623 Před rokem +3

      I mean the bible does tell us to dress modestly. Why do think that is? It applies to both men and women.

    • @Padraigp
      @Padraigp Před rokem

      So the way testosterone works...whether a male or female is having it in their blood stream is that you actually cant hjelp looking at womens bodies. Thats a reality of our biology. If you think you can sit there with your wet lips splayed and its not anything to do with you if somone else is aroused then youre in some idnividualist fantasy world. The reality is how a woman dresses will attract or dispell sexual attraction. Thats just a biologicak reality.

    • @e.458
      @e.458 Před 11 měsíci +1

      ​@@kelleym7623That is because Christianity is born out of two very misogynistic cultures that viewed women as property. We have never kept all of the bible's rules: Or do you execute people for wearing mixed fibre fabrics? Do you tell rich people to give up all their riches if they want to go to heaven? Do you kill people for working on a Saturday? Do you still marry r4pe victims to their r4pists? Do we still stone adulterers to death?
      Heck, the bible itself criticises or repeals some of the rules it made earlier (e.g. dietary law, marriage/divorce law, ...), so why should we insist on keeping harmful, discriminatory laws that are used to marginalise one gender and excuse abusive behaviour of the other? I'll tell you why: because those in power in (some) churches want to keep profiting from an unequal society. And an unequal society where some people are keeping others down IS NOT what Jesus and the early church stood for!

    • @lara-E
      @lara-E Před 11 měsíci +14

      ​@@kelleym7623If we were to take a literal interpretation of the bible, men who lust after females should gouge their eye's out and cut off the hand leading them to sin.
      Jesus does not say anything about it A) being the girl/woman's fault or B) what the woman/ girl should've done.
      A calling for modesty does not undermine a man's duty to look at women without lust in their hearts.
      Men have been told by Jesus they MUST NOT objectify women and they MUST truly look at them with the respect and dignity God has ordained in us regardless of what the woman is wearing.

    • @chantalfinn6173
      @chantalfinn6173 Před 11 měsíci +3

      My idea of Modesty can be different to someone else
      Wear what you want unless there's a dress code for work

  • @lovinglifebutnotonearth3909

    Bedsheets were taken to prove that your wedding night was your first time? What do they expect to happen to women our first time? For us to lose a pint of blood? For many women, our first time has little to no blood. Heck, some women are born without a hymen. Some women have their hymen broken playing sports.

    • @jungtothehuimang
      @jungtothehuimang Před rokem +34

      And that is so dangerous bc women who don't have a hymen or who don't bleed are considered "impure" even if they have never had sex. I am genuinely disgusted by the idea of purity or virginity in general, but this practice is just particularly vile.

    • @yveltalsea
      @yveltalsea Před 11 měsíci +5

      my psychotic ex told me i was a sIut after we had sex for the first time because there was no blood.
      Like first of all, none of ur business, but second of all, that's not even how that works LOL. I was still a virgin before that, not that it matters, but the fact that people even look for that is so stupid and backwards it blew my mind.

    • @yourewrong9028
      @yourewrong9028 Před 11 měsíci +2

      Of course I’m not defending the practice at all, it’s vile, but I highly doubt this cult let their girls play any sports or do anything strenuous like that. (Yes I understand that that doesn’t address any of your other points, and again, not defending it in the slightest.)

    • @chantalfinn6173
      @chantalfinn6173 Před 11 měsíci

      Patriarchy

  • @divinemessenger2030
    @divinemessenger2030 Před rokem +64

    The bedsheets thing is really crazy. That’s beyond violating. Im sorry all of us have gone through this in some way or another. Im recently realizing the trauma I have and I’m in therapy for it. Hoping it gets better. 😇

    • @Evija3000
      @Evija3000 Před 11 měsíci +5

      Bleeding isn't even common if the husband is even somewhat gentle. That's some archaic thinking.
      I also work in a court and the idea that someone could produce an old bloody sheet as evidence in a divorce case is hilarious.

  • @All5AJz
    @All5AJz Před rokem +122

    Pentecostal household and was molested by my Paw paw who was the Preacher of the church. Sick man harmed many of the children in complete compliance to his wishes the adults just turned a blind eye he was helping change their children's life to God in their eyes.
    I have healed took many many years to heal all the damage that has been done.

  • @hannahcrazyhawk
    @hannahcrazyhawk Před rokem +35

    I was raised in a cult. It was evil. I'm so sorry you endured this crap too. 😔

  • @lydiadecker3851
    @lydiadecker3851 Před rokem +11

    These teachings are SO dangerous for young girls. As a young teenager, I lived in fear of using a tampon or wearing the wrong thing that would "make a man stumble". I stayed pure as a teenager and dated my first when I was 18. He wound up being mentally and sexually abusive, but it took so long to leave because I was told that no one else would want me since "we" had gone all the way. He used this as a crutch to make me stay even though it happened as a result of his abuse.

  • @typicaltabbycat5383
    @typicaltabbycat5383 Před rokem +93

    I only use tampons for when I go swimming if it’s that time of the month, and it feels uncomfortable. You have to put in a correct position. As a Christian, I just want to say I’m sorry that you’ve been through some BS all your life. 🙁

    • @melt9173
      @melt9173 Před rokem +13

      You are not putting them in correctly of it is uncomfortable. You should chat with a doctor about this.

    • @UusshuU
      @UusshuU Před rokem

      u actually don’t have to! that part of ur vagina naturally like blocks (???) itself off and u won’t have to deal w blood while ur in the water! or else how would u shower during ur period lol. just make sure to like wash ur bits before getting in lol
      EDIT: I WAS WRONG, it’s actually cos of the counter pressure of the water. u still don’t have 2 worry tho cos water will not flow * out * of the vagina !!

    • @haleywood8040
      @haleywood8040 Před rokem +3

      Likely not putting it in deep enough or crooked. U gotta go all the way to the base, try to keep it straight (I find doing a half stand/squat is the easiest position to do this) and press it all the way in.
      Having the right size for your flow is also super important. A light flow and a regular size tampon is going to be uncomfortable, hard, and dry.
      Regardless, they take time to get used to even when done correctly. Took me maybe 3 cycles before I stopped noticing them.

  • @Feralfoundry
    @Feralfoundry Před rokem +8

    I watched a show about women in a muslim culture. The women and girls had to wear the full covering, only their hands could be seen. A young girl of 13 was assaulted and killed and the man that did it was aquitted because she had such beautiful hands and she kept making them visible like when she would hold her little sisters hand....😮 men will find any excuse to assault when that act is all that fills their heart and mind. Gross inhumanity.

  • @niconestra
    @niconestra Před rokem +39

    That 1970's NYC ghetto I grew up in doesn't look so bad in comparison to what you went through.

  • @elizabethmcintosh6722
    @elizabethmcintosh6722 Před rokem +23

    I grew up in a much less intense and trendy form of nondenominational evangelicalism and was taught these things as well

    • @chadwilliams3137
      @chadwilliams3137 Před rokem

      It wasn’t Christianity because if they adhere to the Mosaic law they’re Jews

    • @elizabethmcintosh6722
      @elizabethmcintosh6722 Před rokem +2

      @@chadwilliams3137 lmfao that’s not how that works and doesn’t matter in this situation?

    • @chadwilliams3137
      @chadwilliams3137 Před rokem

      @@elizabethmcintosh6722 yes it is if you knew anything about Christianity the Jews are still bound to the law because they don’t believe Jesus was the Messiah and if they follow the law they’re Jews

    • @elizabethmcintosh6722
      @elizabethmcintosh6722 Před rokem +2

      @@chadwilliams3137 lmao

    • @chadwilliams3137
      @chadwilliams3137 Před rokem

      @@elizabethmcintosh6722 laugh all you want that’s the separation of Christianity and Judaism is they’re belief in the Messiah and The following of the Mosaic law Jesus came and broke the Mosaic law… if you were to still follow the law that’d make you Jewish not Christian because Jesus broke the Law for us to not have to follow it because it’s stupid and made for control Jesus called the Jewish church the synagogue of Satan

  • @mariannerognerud
    @mariannerognerud Před rokem +3

    ❤ I'm so glad you're out of that unhealthy cult. 🌈
    Hug from Norway.

  • @haleywood8040
    @haleywood8040 Před rokem +34

    I never bled during sex or even masturbation. Like, ever. I never understood the hymen thing.

    • @ShellyCline
      @ShellyCline Před rokem +5

      Every one's body is different. Not everyone bleeds. And it doesn't make you any less virgin.

    • @Evija3000
      @Evija3000 Před 11 měsíci +2

      As I understand it it's a bit like a scrunchie. It can break, but oftentimes it just stretches so there's no blood. And it's different for different women.

  • @minksrule2196
    @minksrule2196 Před rokem +20

    Most of things are still a thing in the culture I was raised in

  • @lizrivera389
    @lizrivera389 Před rokem +3

    Omg my mom told me the same thing and I wasn’t allowed to use them for the longest.

  • @lbmartinet
    @lbmartinet Před rokem +14

    I’m so sorry you had to go thru that and I thank you for sharing ❤

  • @ShellyCline
    @ShellyCline Před rokem +1

    The bed sheets thing is hilarious.
    If someone had tried that with me on my wedding night I would have LOVED to see their face.
    I bled everywhere. They would have needed a mop.

  • @MelissaBennett-gn2nn
    @MelissaBennett-gn2nn Před rokem +2

    It’s amazing how those abusive beliefs still stay with you. I still only use tampons when I swim during my period.

  • @JC-lq3md
    @JC-lq3md Před rokem +4

    Wow! I grew up in a similar cult, (though not nearly as strict as yours), and they did hammer us with the "purity" culture as well. Of course, wearing AnYtHiNg that showed off our figures was considered slutty. You HAVE to wait till marriage! I finally lost my virginity at 32. (Outside of marriage). I am so glad I did. Holy shit! Dudes! It's just a bodily function! What's the big freakin' deal about sex? Sure, you should of course be careful because you're exchanging fluids, but geez! It's so creepy to be obsessed with a womans "virginity". Ugh!

  • @crazymusicchick
    @crazymusicchick Před rokem +2

    Tampon thing is taught in many other religions too so in my sex ed class at a government school the teacher told us its not losing your vaginity but some cultures belive it dose so dont use tampons .

  • @albertvirgil4471
    @albertvirgil4471 Před 2 měsíci +1

    NOT TELLING THE TRUTH IS BAD. YOU HAVE MADE YOUR CHOICE. DEAL WITH THE CONSEQUENCES! LET OTHERS MAKE THEIR OWN CHOICES! DON'T INFLUENCE WHAT OTHERS SHOULD OR SHOULDN'T THINK!

  • @lockhak33
    @lockhak33 Před rokem +16

    🤮 this stuff makes me feel sick

  • @simonewright1120
    @simonewright1120 Před rokem +2

    Bless u my dear....religious culture can b crap.

  • @zoeyclarks7609
    @zoeyclarks7609 Před 11 měsíci +2

    They never read the bible of they thing its womens fault for causing mean to be lustful. Jesus literaly told them to rip out their own eyeballs amd cut off their hands if it causes you to stumble. Like he (being metaphorical and symbolic) tokd men that it was their reaponsibility to keep it in their pants.

  • @gracefoster7587
    @gracefoster7587 Před 2 měsíci

    I get not wanting a bunch of think pieces being done about your wedding but calling it evil feels like a stretch. Like it’s negative, but it’s also some stranger bitching about your wedding. It’s harder to not stumble upon something negative about yourself when you’re a public figure, so I’d just not go on social media after publicizing my wedding if I know I’ll be hurt if someone says something negative about it. I already know I wouldn’t show my aunt pictures of my wedding/other big events or interact with her during them because it’s a given she will find something negative to say and I don’t wanna deal with it lol

  • @SolaGratia.
    @SolaGratia. Před rokem

    Were you ever on Recovering Grace? I stopped using it after that ex ATI student when on a mass shooting spree. He was all over the forums just before the shooting so the FBI shut it down and I was so freaked out, I never went back. I didn't even know it was still up and running.

  • @user-sy3wd5jn4n
    @user-sy3wd5jn4n Před 6 měsíci

    I feel victimized watching this woman

  • @barbaradownie3265
    @barbaradownie3265 Před rokem +2

    💜🙏💜

  • @AwildGwen
    @AwildGwen Před rokem +5

    this cult is scarily similar to Christianity and I'm starting to get worried-

    • @donut9719
      @donut9719 Před rokem

      Uh. Its one crazy non demonational branch. To be fair, once the protestant branch starts departing further from Anglicans and Lutherans the more heretical they get.

    • @Feralfoundry
      @Feralfoundry Před rokem +3

      ​@user-lr6sv4nn5u no, we are furious that you believe our bodies are any of your business.

  • @nunyabusiness164
    @nunyabusiness164 Před rokem +1

    that's so fucked up 😭

  • @homethornburg7557
    @homethornburg7557 Před rokem

    My parents teach my family this

  • @devincristopher3
    @devincristopher3 Před rokem

    😮🙈

  • @SillyAshy
    @SillyAshy Před rokem

    My moms ex friend is friends with the duggers sad to say I’ve hung out with them

  • @Dwelleronthethreshold89
    @Dwelleronthethreshold89 Před 11 měsíci +2

    This is taken to an extreme for sure. But much of tradition solves problems that we forgot about. For example, science teaches us that the more porn an individual consumes, the less they are stimulated by physical sex and begin to seek out more deranged sexual experiences. Also we have figured out that women who experience many sexual partners are less likely to retain the ability to bond with a partner at all. There are reasons these became rules to follow- God does not give the law arbitrarily. But you can expect man to take God’s way and to twist it and pervert it.

    • @forest_green
      @forest_green Před 7 měsíci

      Where are your sources here? That's wild.

  • @Maryland_Kulak
    @Maryland_Kulak Před měsícem

    What has feminism taught you? That you can dress and act however you want and anything that happens is 100% the man’s fault?

    • @ThatLizHunter
      @ThatLizHunter  Před měsícem

      Sounds like you’ve never been taught personal responsibility

    • @Maryland_Kulak
      @Maryland_Kulak Před měsícem

      ⁠Actually it sounds like you haven’t been taught personal responsibility or consideration of others.

    • @ThatLizHunter
      @ThatLizHunter  Před měsícem

      We’re each responsible for our own actions. Feminism broke down barriers that prevented women from making their own personal choices - my grandmother couldn’t open a bank account in her own name when my dad was born. Feminism allows me as a woman to live independently and be personally responsible for my successes and failures.
      If you want to blame women for men’s choices and mistakes, then you’re just a tool of patriarchal control.

  • @ExpertBustice
    @ExpertBustice Před rokem +5

    I'm not trying to make light of your story at all, but you should also put a content warning on that coffee. You almost spilling it several times has my anxiety through the roof lol

  • @musingmusic6143
    @musingmusic6143 Před rokem

    I mean if you’re going to wear revealing clothes creeps are gonna be creeps.
    Sometimes I wish it was an all girls planet.

    • @anitalauer2715
      @anitalauer2715 Před rokem +13

      I’ve lived all over the world and I’ve seen women get harassed when wearing Burkas. Creeps are responsible for their own ish.

    • @musingmusic6143
      @musingmusic6143 Před rokem

      @@anitalauer2715 yes no matter what you wear if they’re a creep they will creep. But if you show more skin they will take a sick pleasure out of just looking at you and it might encourage them to do more than just that too

    • @anitalauer2715
      @anitalauer2715 Před rokem +9

      @@musingmusic6143 NO! We DO NOT have to take responsibility for anyone else’s thoughts or actions.

    • @musingmusic6143
      @musingmusic6143 Před rokem

      @@anitalauer2715 I NEVER SAID YOU DID! I’m saying that they like that women show more skin! They love it!!! Do I have to spell it out!?? Those sickos get pleasure from just looking!! But it WILL encourage them! How? I mean if you’ve ever seen true crime stuff they start thinking in their heads that they own you, they might even think you’re dressing that way to impress them!! Is it that hard to think about!!????

    • @musingmusic6143
      @musingmusic6143 Před rokem

      @@anitalauer2715 I mean if you’re ok with people looking at you like that than sure

  • @aodh5966
    @aodh5966 Před rokem +1

    It's true that masturbation leads to decreased enjoyment. Especially if it vibrates. This is logical. Same goes for men too. I believe in abstinence. No PMO can turn a weak, anxious man into a strong man mentally and physically. Try a period of abstinence see how you feel. You don't have to act on those feelings. Let the fire inside you build up

    • @KobKobold
      @KobKobold Před rokem +15

      Well, maybe that if masturbation makes sex less enjoyable, it's the fault of the partner for not trying hard enough.

    • @aodh5966
      @aodh5966 Před rokem

      @@KobKobold no. It's about sensitivity. If you have increased sensitivity (more virgin like) you will enjoy sex more. By overstimulating you decrease the sensitivity and your enjoyment will also decrease. That's the whole "less is more" logic

    • @Feralfoundry
      @Feralfoundry Před rokem +3

      Ffs, stop. Masterbation does not diminish seggs with a partner. It allows both parties to be able to understand their bodies. Being able to have that conversation is difficult when the whole thing is shrouded in misinformation, lies, and completely gross decrees from men who are not married or have 20 kids. Their wives look like shredded tires. Keep making seggs the ultimate goal of life in the grossest manner possible and you end up with chattel pens and an entire culture and religion based not on faith, but on social controls, enslavement of women and girls, and a population of coddled, ignorant, and spoiled men who demand satisfaction regardless and with no ability or reason to learn self control or responsibility.

    • @Adardidnothingwrong
      @Adardidnothingwrong Před rokem +6

      That's like saying exercising makes your muscles weaker. That is absolutely not true.

    • @aodh5966
      @aodh5966 Před rokem

      @@Adardidnothingwrong exercise does make your muscles weaker if you do not consume enough protein to build them back up again. Have you ever tried abstinence? I have and it works wonders. Semen isn't cheap, it's the most nutrient rich compound in your body. Senen is more nutrient rich than blood. Now you wouldn't drain your own blood because you can understand it's a waste of nutrients, for whatever blood you lose needs to be replaced. Same logic goes for semen as well

  • @JaneDoe-fz6qc
    @JaneDoe-fz6qc Před rokem +2

    Crying about being in a cult, then gets out and joins a cult🙄

  • @davidgillespie1280
    @davidgillespie1280 Před rokem +3

    Sorry you went through shit, but get this off my feed.

    • @louisa4218
      @louisa4218 Před rokem +39

      She gave a content warning and you chose to continue watching. Sharing things like this is very important. It is helpful to those who have gone through similar so they know they aren't alone and that nothing is wrong with them for questioning what they have been taught is sinful to question their entire life. It is also important because there seems to be a lot of people out there who believe that religion is mostly harmless. Religious abuse is actual much more common than people believe.

    • @darcymoon2109
      @darcymoon2109 Před rokem +27

      You are not helping to get this off your feed.

    • @testosteronic
      @testosteronic Před rokem +19

      The shorts algorithm is completely different from the rest of the CZcams algorithm. When I see content I don't want to see again I tell CZcams not to recommend the channel to me, you can do this from the three dots on the short when scrolling through your shorts feed

    • @softsix
      @softsix Před rokem +19

      What a useless comment. It does nothing to contribute to anything. You just provided her engagement and didn't solve your "problem". Learn how to use the internet, David. :)

    • @Armistead_MacSkye
      @Armistead_MacSkye Před rokem +6

      @David: you were raised in that cult, too. And you are here trying to shut her down.

  • @daemon2426
    @daemon2426 Před 5 měsíci

    My husband and I live in the South. We've already agreed that we will not let our children be taught sex education at school. We will not let them drill the same abstinence only bs into our kids that was drilled into us. In different years I had both the chewing gum and oreo "demonstrations" on purity. I deeply appreciate the many uncomfortable but necessary and informative conversations my Mom had with me about my changing body and how I should expect partners to treat me. I wasn't always smart enough to listen, but Mom always gave me an age appropriate education from the time I started asking questions. That's what my husband and I hope for when we have kids