I spent a day with MALADAPTIVE DAYDREAMERS
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- čas přidán 22. 02. 2022
- I spent a day with MALADAPTIVE DAYDREAMERS to learn the truth about this elusive disorder that keeps these guests daydreaming constantly. Sponsors ▸betterhelp.com/padilla to get 10% off your first month! ▸Get 25% off & zero delivery fees on first order of $15 or more, when you download the DoorDash app & enter code PADILLA.
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Ola
Hello Anthony
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Hi
Learning your life long "safe" coping mechanism is actually a problem.
It can be a problem, it’s just something you have to learn to manage. I know a lot of people use journaling or writing to help with it, including myself.
It isn’t a problem inherently.
The thing that makes it a problem is if it becomes a habit
Fr
@@threemashup2662 If it's not a problem, it's literally just daydreaming. The word maladaptive means that, by definition, it's harmful. Learn your shit.
I’m a maladaptive daydreamer and people often don’t realize how debilitating it really is. Often times my daydreams are off of shows or my real life and part of my spirit gets crushed when I realize that’s not what these people are actually like. I prefer my mind over real life and most of the time I am in a daydream no matter where I am. I could be with my family or friends and it’s still there. I am unable to have fun without a daydream playing in my head.
Right? It feels as if life is just dulled, without those daydreams..
ikr! like i feel like i will go through my day but the only thing i’m looking forward to is daydreaming and the story of the daydream
I'm the same the way I cope by incorporating my real life with my dreams.
why don't you guys just become writers and write books with all those daydream stories lol..
@@OArchivesX that’s a good idea but i can’t write lol
The fact that it took me two hours to finish this because I kept having to pause and daydream about my own responses 😂
SAME OMG
No like for real
Same
Honestly, same. :,)
Dang it!! 😂
It's so weird listening to people talk so openly about something I kept so secret for my whole life. It's comforting to know I'm not the only one.
😅 Yes, I never even knew I had a disorder. I just thought I was weird.
I once used think I’m mad and there’s something wrong with my mind
I read your comment and daydreamed we actually had a conversation together 😂
That's really true 😌
Same 😅
as a maladaptive daydreamer i fucken appreciate the shit out of this
Yeah
For the longest time I thought this was normal until I saw a comment one time that gave me a something to search.
yeah!
Wait I do this but not for weeks on end. I thought everyone could watch movies in their heads. (Commented this before watching the video)
sameee
As someone with maladaptive daydreaming, it’s sad to see people in the comment section other fellow MD, saying it saved their life. Maladaptive daydreaming feels good, it helps you cope with how reality sucks, very true. Its not healthy, it has made me procrastinate so much, and it really affected a lot of aspects of my life, even though it did help with my anxiety. Md can be considered like any addiction, it feels good, you don’t think it’s affecting you, but in reality it is.
I agree, it's like an addiction I hate having MD but litteraly can't stop and IDK what I'd do if it all went away. Probably fall into a deep depression? who knows. I wish I never had it.
Agree. It's destroying me. I want to stop but can't. If I stop I feel empty and sad. Like really sad! I don't feel like myself. I have to daydreaming helped me during my teenage years. But now it's destroying my life.
I cannot sleep!!! At all!! It's 1:29 am
If it helps any of you, IIRC it's considered a form of dissociation by people like Pete Walker (wrote a book on Complex PTSD and talked about chronic daydreaming being part of the Freeze-type response to stress/trauma)! So maybe resources to dealing with chronic dissociation will be helpful.
I know it may sound weird, but as someone that has struggled with addiction (alcohol, weed, amphetamines, daydreaming) and other maladaptive coping mechanisms, these mechanisms actually help you survive. I've been in schema therapy for 1,5 years, and I've learned that the key to stop these mechanisms is to tackle the emotions that trigger them. So you need to find healthy ways to cope, instead of focusing on stopping these mechanisms by trying to not do them. I hope you find help and can improve your life.
“I called it watching tv in my head” this gave me sooo much validation, as I used to do the same thing as a young child with favorite characters and tv shows before I developed my own fantasy world and called it “playing in my head” thanks so much for this video Anthony
I called it roleplaying by myself!! Or even just playing by myself because as a kid I would use objects and toys and movement to act out what I had going on in my mind
literally, like as I started to get older I felt like I was crazy and no one else did it, but I love to see people who have experienced the same thing and that it’s not always negative
@@zvoid_error000 same
omg same. especially when they talked about how their small world started to keep expanding i felt understood.
One of my friends said she did that in primary school, I haven't had any contact with her since then. Honestly kinda worried for her now I hope she is doing okay
Mine are real people that I turn I to completely different characters. I use celebrities, internet influencers, people off the street, family and friends. It’s rare that I ever create a new character it’s always one based off someone real. They all have different storylines for what universe I want to daydream about. It’s really intense :(
hi, can have ur insta or something? , bc I need friend who feel the same
It’s the exact same for me
Same here but usually I use character that others have created and/or my idealized characters
Same soemtimes
Same
glad to see people actually talk about this and get representation instead of just being brushed away as a maladaptive day dreamer myself
I recently revealed the genders of my two girlfriends. It got a lot of hate and now has 30 times more dislikes than likes. I am really sad that people can be so mean. Sorry for using your comment to talk about my problems, dear ipo
@@AxxLAfriku huh
@@AxxLAfriku the fuck
@@AxxLAfriku if you don't mind I'm trying not to be rude but I don't understand the wording of your sentence.
@@AxxLAfriku "Reveal the gender of my girlfriends" them being your girlfriends already gives away their gender mate
Maladaptive daydreaming honestly saved my life. Back when I was SEVERELY depressed it was the only thing that kept me going and I'm so glad that it did.
I told this to someone before, it saved my life too and even though it took up most of my childhood I needed it at that moment.
@@amandarodriguez5070 Thanks for sharing❤
Hope you feel better now!
It's not maladaptive daydreaming if it's beneficial to you.
@@sophian.1201 I wouldn't say it's "beneficial" to me but it is a coping mechanism 😅
@@sophian.1201 it being used as a coping mechanism doesn’t change that it’s still very much a mental condition.
Daydreaming is the behaviour. Maladaptive Daydream is the addiction. It's a massive struggle for anyone who has this unhealthy coping mechanism as I can attest to. Thankyou for drawing attention to this in a way that is positive by showing the difficult reality of it so we can better learn about it and help people who are suffering from this addiction.
I'm an undiagnosed maladaptive day dreamer. I day dream for hours a day everyday, and when I get interrupted I just quickly do what I gotta do and then my brain kinda goes "previously on your daydream" or something like that. I'm going to my first year of highschool and I'm scared the day dreaming is only gonna get in the way which I'm scared since these years of school rlly count. I wanna get help but at the same time I rlly don't
@@average_accident322 Hey! As far as I know, MD is still being researched and is not fully recognized as a disorder yet, so you can’t actually be diagnosed by a professional yet🤷🏼 if you feel that your daydreams/behaviors fit the description of MD then you have full right to refer to them as that if you want to. I’m sorry that you worry about them going into high school😔 if you have any way to visit a counselor of some sort and feel secure/comfortable doing so than they might be able to help brainstorm ideas on how to gain more control of your daydreams (tho you might have to explain what MD is). I worked with a therapist, and we came up with some stuff that’s helped me. Regardless, good luck with your first year and I hope things end up okay for you👍
@@hivemindgoblin8540 thank you! I have a personal therapist I can contact to I can talk to them about it. If you have any suggestions on things that might help I'd be happy to hear!
@@average_accident322 I think that what helps best is largely going to depend on the person and how their daydreams affect them🤔 something I do that helps me is if I’m aware I’m starting to daydream, before I get to absorbed I imagine myself inserted into the story and tell the characters that I can’t daydream right now. I’m not in the story or world in any way, so imagining myself interacting with the characters is largely jarring and uncomfortable, which helps refocus me. Something else that helps me is that my dog will paw/nudge/lick me insistently for attention if I ignore him (aka zone out) for too long. My dog is a service dog (not for MD haha, I’m a diagnosed autistic and have chronic illnesses that he’s been trained tasks to help me manage) so he’s with me 24/7, but you could ask a friend or someone trusted to tap you on the hand or something if they see you distracted for a long time if you think a physical reminder would help. Just ideas, I hope this helps to inspire though😊
@@hivemindgoblin8540 thank you! I appreciate the suggestions! I'll try them out and see how they go! Thank you again
What I found quite interesting was when Kristen said that she wasn’t able to bring back her characters, in my daydreams I can do anything I want and that’s what I love most about them.
i found that interesting too, someone died quite awhile ago for me, but i havent fully been impacted by it because i just find myself replaying their past. there are certain times where I have to grieve alongside his partner and friends, so i can definitely see where shes coming from to an extent.
im kind of in the middle where i have to justify any big changes in the timeline or whatever you want to call it, so i’ll spend like a whole night reworking everything so it makes sense story-wise that that character never died 😅 it’s so much work lmao
ya I thought that too, but it seems to me her world is more realistic, as in like not magical. so when you think of a storyline you don’t want to just ignore, you feel like you can’t compromise the integrity of the world, because personally I have rules in the universe so I’m assuming she does too.
@@fsc4823 well, I hope the retcons of characters being alive are better than some in actual TV shows/movies, bc some of those are... rough (looking at you palpatine).
@@trickytreyperfected1482 omg i would never disrespect any of what i have goin on in there by doing anything close to what tros did to the skywalker saga 😭 “somehow palpatine returned” like WHAT?!???? nope nope nope. if i do run things back i do it with intent and it’s always really well-worked out and respectful to the characters/people whatever u wanna call em :)
I'm really grateful Anthony is out here educating people on what maladaptive daydreamers are, I personally didn't even know what this condition was until now. It's always good to absorb some knowledge.
you're literally everywhere
I agree, it’s cool learning about everything and being able to know that everyone is different and all the different disorders, ways of identifying, and overall kinds of ways that things impact peoples life
took the words right off of my mouth. for a long time i thought it was just a weird case of adhd that i have.
looooooooooooooooooooooooooool,bro if your going to this channel FOR phycological advisement, i will quote for you" It's a proposed diagnosis of a disordered form of dissociative absorption associated with excessive fantasy that is not recognized by any major medical or psychological criteria" this channel is full of what you basically call sub-factors to actual phenomena , as psychiatrist, i can verify this channel is a channel focused around the perpetuation of PPD in it's hypochondriacal form. this , isn't a condition or disorder it's an addiction,as its a sub trait of OCD. These people have OCD, and in their OCD they convince themselves they know better than professionals, and in echo chambers start telling each other they get each other because they're the only people on the planet that will ever appreciate and acknowledge these delusional disassociated thoughts. this is what you might actually call psychological propaganda.
Thank you so much for these videos-Videos like this are just amazing-spreading awareness, in a way that isn't judgemental 😄 and which also makes people feel equal-to open up...(Sorry my grammar is bad)
My jaw dropped when I saw the title of the video. I never thought I'd see someone as big as you talking about the biggest, most embarrassing, and misunderstood thing about me that up until this year was my best kept secret. This is insane, thank you so much.
Same. I literally gasped a clicked right away when I saw it
Same!
i gasped too 😭 im so happy
And here you have me, not even realising we are supposed to be embarrassed about it.. So this was interesting.
i was super taken aback myself! this man covers everything!
im a maladaptive daydreamer and i hate it when people dont realize how extreme it is and just say "but i daydream a lot too!" yeah. i cant stop. i cant watch videos, movies, series, play games, listen to music or anything like that without daydreaming, and i cant stop it
So true, I've gone days without eating or talking to anyone just to walk around my room and daydream, it's so bad
We can overcome it guys❤❤
Yes, it's the drifting away without noticing :x
@@athtarasterios9695 yeahh
I have never let my daydreaming get to a point where I laid in bed for days, or didn't go out to try to live my life, but I can legit see myself as a maladaptive daydreamer. All the things they do, from the pacing, to making immersive worlds, and characters, and "watching television" in my head are all things I have done for a long time. I do it to cope with boredom, and anxiety. I think it hasn't ever interrupted life because I'm not bored when doing something fun and engaging, and in the downtime, my imagination is packed up and ready to go with me. I spend a LOT of time in my head. And I do get irritated if something I'm not enjoying (ex: work or school) is keeping me from it for copious amounts of time.
I am definitely going to look more into this.
Glad you were able to find a video that you could relate to! :)
Samee!! Didn't know there was a word for it
This is exactly how I am. If it isn't really debilitating, you might want to look into Immersive Daydreaming (if you haven't found it already. I realize this comment is 4 months old.) It's Maladaptive Daydreaming without getting in the way of functioning in your day to day life.
@@mythicmusique6226 interesting, I will look into it!
omg I feel so validated by your comment
We need to see him interview pathological liars... that’d be an interesting convo
BUT can we trust anything they say..
What’s your name?
*intense sweating”
Well, if that wouldn't be the perfect opportunity for him to extend the olive branch to Trisha Paytas after the whole DID scandal lmao
BUT would they even agree to come on?
@@leticiafelix9838 well not just the DID thing. the trans scandal one and a few others. trisha needs help honestly.
When Kristen would become emotional, Anthony would speak in order take the pressure of answering through tears and sort of “giving her a moment to recover” but not dismiss her feelings. A good characteristic of a great interviewer. Very well done.
I do actually think he is the best interviewer on youtube
@@onijaradu he is definitely on my top 2!
@@allisonwunderbread5283 Who is the other one? I love Anthony's videos.
Love when good interviews are able to pick up little things like that and help whenever needed. It's something small but very appreciated
@@storytime1469 I think Sean evans would be my other in top two of CZcams interviewers. Anthony deserves the second for sure
I'm honestly really glad this was made. A lot of people go "oh I've daydreamed for a while before I totally have maladaptive daydreaming" like no. It's the same as depression in the way that everyone gets sad but it's about how much it effects you and how often it's happening. You can't experience something once in a blue moon and then label yourself with these debilitating things.
Exactly!!!! There so much more to it 😭
Thank you so much for this comment. When people said to me "everyone does it" Or "I daydream so I'm definitely a Maladaptive daydreamer" Made me feel like an attention-seeker and invalidated, I felt like maybe It was just me being lazy,overimaginative and dramatic.
I felt unseen and that really hurt my feelings.
I'm sure that everyone has their own struggle and they are completely valid (no exception, everyone's feelings are valid) but I really appreciate when people approach carefully to this topic, maladaptive daydream is not the same as being a simple daydreamer, and I'm really glad when people realize it is a struggle for many of us;something that can really destroy your everyday life.
Luckily people is getting more and more educated in this topic and I hope that helps them to understand what it's harmful (or helpful) to say when they speak with somebody who struggles with Maladaptive daydreaming.
(Sorry for my bad English, it is my second language)
If you are reading this, you are valid.
Remember to take care and be nice to yourself.
You got this 💖💖
@@steelmoon6095 awe you seem like such a sweet person. You're not any of those negative things. Like you said everyone has their struggles. Unfortunately some people can't see how others are struggling and brush it off as laziness or being dramatic. That doesn't mean you're not seriously being effected. I hope you're able to find a loving support system that helps you throughout this and I wish you the best on your journey. 💖
@@nutella1757 Thank you so Much, you are really nice❤❤
I really appreciate this.
Good luck to everyone who is struggling with any mental health difficulties.
Yes, day dreaming for only a few minutes like once a while is normal but day dreaming for hours on end multiple times a day is a problem I haven't gotten help yet cuz I'm not sure if I even wanna stop tbh
I have a feeling maladaptive daydreaming will eventually be classified as a dissociative disorder. I have OSDD and the mentions of using the daydreams as an escape from the real world really hits home, except that I don’t have storylines and I don’t know what happens when I dissociate.
I absolutely agree. For me this is exactly what I do when I’m depressed. I spend all day in this world in my head and put one of my daydream characters on in the real world. I was conscious in both worlds and remember both but everything is kind of fuzzy. For me I only do this when my mental health is bad, and right now I’m in the process of writing out the inner world. It’s fun and gets it out of my head. I’m also autistic so that might be part of it.
I agreeeee so much. I definitely think it’s a type of dissociation.
What scares me the most when having maladaptive daydreaming is that when I snapped out of it and realized what I just did. I just caught myself talking to myself and acting out what I keep imagining like laughing, the body gestures and having conversations on my own.
Omg me too!
Not to that big degree but if i daydream in my home alone, and characters are having dialog i would also copy their gestures and even say their lines outloud, though i realise what i am doing its kinda not intentionally in a way
I get what you mean. What scares me sometimes is when I'm driving. Like you know how sometimes people just drive from point A to point B on autopilot. It get like that too, but sometimes it's more intense with the day dreams and I would completely miss an exit and not realize it till later, and I'm like, wait, where am I? >.< Thankfully, this doesn't happen too often because I try to catch myself when I start slipping in too deep. And I know that this is Not ok to be doing while driving cuz I can put other people at risk.
Me too. Most of the people surrounding me are used to seeing me do those things. One time, I crossed a really busy road without looking if the cars stopped. I only realized what I was doing when I was already in the middle and a car abruptly stopped with a loud sound. I was in my "imagination world" so I couldnt see whats in front of me.
Dude the amount of times ive been caught talking to myself- i think some people i know think im crazy
my MD personally stemmed from both loneliness as a kid (i’ve always been kinda distant and anti-social) and mild mental abuse from my dad. he wasn’t bad enough to me to make me REALLY fcked up, just enough to force me into a separate world where i’m “perfect.” it also might’ve stemmed from a severe anxiety disorder i’ve been diagnosed with since 3rd grade OR vice versa (anxiety could’ve come BECAUSE i’m not used to the ‘real world’. i’m not sure) i’m so glad i can talk abt this finally 😭
Asocial, not anti-social
I feel you a hundred percent. This is great we all can finally talk about it. We’re not alone anymore.
Bruh, I feel this for sure. I grew up in a community where even certain kinds of thoughts were considered sins and I felt I wasn’t allowed to be myself and I felt I had to constantly police myself and my thoughts. Daydreaming was where I could escape and be myself, but there was also anxiety there. Now I use it to essentially heal myself and my childhood.
@@acetronaut really dude he’s talking about difficult experiences he has had, and you’re out here correcting him smh.
Sending you a big hug, you got this.
Sh*t. I do this when I'm depressed or having a lot of anxiety. I didn't know it had a name and it was an actual thing. Wow. Thank you for this.
i think that’s just daydreaming
@@i.love.kingvon how can you say what somebody else is experiencing..you cant.
@@TheKatarinaGiselle im saying that as a person who has this it isn't subjected to emotions much
No that's just daydreaming , maladaptive daydreaming doesn't go away no matter if ur happy or sad or depressed
@@TheKatarinaGiselle because they do that only when they're depressed or anxious
I’m honestly so scared to tell my parents abt this bc I feel like they’ll force me to stop but I don’t want to it’s the only thing that calms me down in stressful situations
If you don’t want to tell them. Then don’t?
You don't have to tell them. I would suggest maybe draw or write abt it? Like make a webtoon or something that way you can get some money or smth
Not sure how old you are but I would try get help. I missed out on so much of the school, highschool, and university fun times because I was preoccupied. Lost so much of my young life that I will never get back .
Me too but it’s affecting my grades and so rn so I dont know What to do I can’t help but daydream in class. Its honestly taking over my life.
I wouldn’t diagnose myself as a “maladaptive daydreamer” but maybe a daydreamer in general. In my mind I’m always dreaming about this video game in my head and I’m always thinking of new dialogue, new cutscenes, new gameplay mechanics, new plot points, etc. i even went as far as to learn how to draw so I can better express these ideas I see everyday. Im also going to college to hone my professional skills in writing so I can one day make this daydream into a reality
Yep! Definitely me.
Im still not sure if what I’m experiencing is Maladaptive Daydreaming, It goes away, but then comes back very strong? Oddly enough, it does feel like an addiction, and my head feels like exploding if I don’t think about it.. so hm.
Yeah, it might’ve also been a coping mechanism now that i think of it..
ive got a similar thing. itll be super strong for a while when i watch a new show or play a new game, but then itll go away until the next thing comes along. my current one has been going for almost a year now, and i think i have a new one forming. also, im not sure if this is normal, but most of the time, the characters in my daydreams arent people. sometimes theyre dragons or cats. idk.
That's what I do! I wouldn't consider it MD though. I feel like it mostly borders coping/disassociation. I do it a lot at work because I can't stand being there, and when I have nothing to fill the time with. Lots of writing/drawing and world building. I kinda wanna know what it'd be like to experience it MD style, but I do have vivid dreams.
i recommend looking into “excessive daydreaming” specifically! there are communities of people who daydream like this but not in a maladaptive way
@@TyraWadman MD is often a coping mechanism as well that just spirals a lot - when you get down to it I don't think it's much different from what you experience. It's just a LOT of it. It's seriously not something you want to experience, though - it's fun in the moment but you lose hours at a time to nothing.
I can't emphasis how this video shook me to my core. This disorder is somthing I've dealt with for a long time and I didn't know whats wrong with me and there is nearly 0 talk around this condition. The pressure was worse when I thought Im the only one. When I found my community and people who were in the same condition I was crying cause for the very first time I felt understood and not alone anymore.
Thank you anthony, for spreading the word and making many young people know that they are not alone
!!! Same
I feel the same
@@Imhighandhungry now you're just calling everyone a bot come on
I feel for you people, as a kid I used to daydream all the time for hours on end but it slowly died down.
It’s kinda crazy to think of how my life would be like if it never did, or if my daydreams became more intricate and easier to lose myself in them. It sounds both cool and scary for sure
Same I just realized that this was an actual thing and its very relieving Im not the only one, but I want stop LSUSJD
I didn’t realize that I’ve been maladaptive daydreaming my whole life until recently. One of the worst parts is when you realize you have to prioritize your life over the daydreaming, and it’s like you have to say good-bye to the story or characters you’ve become so invested in. In a weird and messed up way, it’s heartbreaking.
Why is this so relatable omg 😭
Bro it feels as if I am passing away (dead) from that fantasy world of mine! The people disappearing! It's so sad! I could never say goodbye to him ever
@@yamaagamingyt Fr! For me, it's like when I think that these people that love me so much in my daydreams are never gonna actually exist, I get so sad :(
@@aliaaaafr Aww i feel you, it's the worst feeling that someone i love and adore sm won't ever exist, they are just better than real people.
@@yamaagamingyt exactly. For the longest time I never knew what this was, but when I finally found it out, I was happy to find people I could actually relate to more and more
Omg I watched this just for entertainment and I'm shocked! So to create many universes in your head and live with your characters for years isn't just being creative? Holy.... It's a thing! I had no idea! I used to walk around or stare at a blank wall for hours, completely lost in another realm, everything they said resonated so deeply, the grief of the loss of these characters, the complexity of the universes, the hours, the lost opportunities, not wanting to be bothered, pushing people away, trauma... I definitely have this. I grew up alone with a narcissistic mother, my whole life is trauma, I'm almost 30 and I still struggle to "be normal", no wonder that's what I was doing lol. I do plan to write it all down someday, it's quite entertaining! I Have this universe with magic which was my first one, there are futuristic ones and horror ones, I just need to procrastinate less, live more. Maybe show people what I see.
I grew up with two narcissists, same with me!
Same for me, one of my parents is a narc, and to escape the reality of narc abuse and of my being a "failure" (that's what I thought of myself some time ago, still struggle with this), I would just MD.
i also plan to write down my universe one day but i don't know where to start as i randomly added more and more stuff and changing my plot line time to time and it was sort of never ending and most importantly i am NOT ready for the public judgements yet🙃
I wrote two books. They were bad. I think that was because of my lack of experience as a writer. I am currently working on the third one. I expect it to be better than the first two, but I don't know if it is going to be good enough for showing it to others. Maybe you should all just start writing, instead of telling yourself that you'll do it one day.
Lp
Maladaptive Daydreaming is what made me fail in school and get behind in life. I've had it for a while and it really messed with my mind. Glad to see this being talked about because it's not recognized as harmful.
I fucking hate it
I wanna end it but idk how. Fml
Yeah okay buddy
@@malachirichards1072 ?
Yeah I have it but no one knows and I’ve never really spoke about it? Is there anything you can actually do about it? I mean I don’t mind just living with it but it’s really hard to move on in life at the same speed as everyone else
I'm so glad you interviewed people with this. I've been like this for years and I only make it work because I'm a writer.
Wait, are you me in disguise??
@@puddytat9752 that spiderman meme where they point at each other
eyy me too! i love creating little stories in my head that to me are super real and then writing them exactly how i imagine them
@@keira8372 99% of my stories are based on MD and dreams 😅
I do something similar except I draw it, make character sheets, I take a few notes, so a mix of world building and character art.
Is there like a spectrum of maladaptive daydreaming?
Because I’ve always daydreamed like having a fantasy in my head with many characters worlds and in a sense a few universes that are very much all fleshed out in great detail.
But it’s not necessarily as extreme.
I learned how to stop it to keep it from destroying my day to day life by pausing it like one can pause a movie or video when I needed to focus on something irl.
Now, I’ve mostly delegated it mostly to before sleep and driving-I can compartmentalize enough to actually focus on the road.
And when I’m out and not focused on much, I’ll just slip into daydreaming too.
It’s weird.
I don't think you need every symptom to be considered. Not everyone paces or rocks or do movements when they daydream. I would believe it's a spectrum of sorts.
This should be in the DSM because same
There definitely is a spectrum, I have it, but I don't do movements when I'm daydreaming, have full control over the stories and I can pull myself out of them when I need too. It still seriously affects my life though because I'll get sucked into daydreaming like when I'm doing homework and do that instead. It's also been causing me memory problems which is fun- I think that if it's negatively affecting your life, even if it doesn't hit all of the check marks, it still is Maladaptive Daydreaming. Though there is another type of daydreaming called Immerseve daydreaming that is more intense than normal daydreaming but it doesn't negatively impact your life like maladaptive daydreaming does.
Finally someone like me!
I think then its just "daydreaming" you know? Which i believe might be a very normal thing alotta people do?
Because ive talked about it with many of my friends. They literally all do it to a certain degree. Like having some characters and scenarios they go to etc....
I think its only considered a problem/disorder when its super intense and takes very long so it messes with real life.
This is great! I remember feeling deep shame when I got caught expressing facial ticks of characters in my head or bursting out laughing. I thought it was totally normal to spend hours daydreaming and processing thoughts through them. It really was hard to come to terms with the fact that something so ingrained in my daily life is a mental illness I never realized I had.
Felt this. I smile, I laugh, I cry, I feel. Still struggling to come to terms with the fact that my other life is an issue
Omg I’m so self-conscious about it. One time I burst out laughing because of something I was imagining and my dad was like why are you laughing? But I didn’t want to tell him what I was imagining so I just shook my head and kept laughing. Plus the number of times people have asked me if I’m okay when I felt fine and was just imagining a character’s facial expression! 😬
as a maladaptive daydreamer i remember crying while trying to google search words to describe what was going on in my head and being so desperate because i couldn't find what it is. finding out what it actually was, that it had a name and people were out there that felt the same way. it was such a relief. this has taken over my life and ruins my school grades... its really painful
when i discovered that it was on a snapchat storie and i remember that i cryed because it was portrayed as a mental disease and i thought " what no i can't have that" while i knew i was like that
Same! I understand this 100%
Same omg :(
Thanks for sharing Clary. If you need tips on how to manage this condition, head to my channel :)
Same...
Well here we go, confession time. So many people in my life believes I'm not getting a drivers license because I'm cheap or lazy but I drove a vespa when I was 15 and I ended up in the ditch because the monotone straight road triggered a daydreaming episode and I can't with good conscience risk killing myself or others with a car since I can't prevent my brain from slipping into the daydream world. But if I admitted the truth it would seem worse than just being seen as lazy.
I'm so glad you said this because same! I've never told anyone that's why I keep "putting off getting a license". It's one of the major reasons I do. Whenever I'm in a car it's so easy for me to slip into one of my daydreams. I'm less worried about crashing if I drive and more concerned with just..."waking up" somewhere random. It would definitely happen.
I have a license and have gotten into an accident because of this. Trust me, you're doing the right thing.
I’m at the point in my life (17) where I’m being pressured to get my license - but I’ve spent all my life daydreaming constantly in the car - and to concentrate in that space instead - idk I just don’t want to give it up
I too do not drive. I have severe depersonalization, but I also just don't trust myself not to slip off into a daydream while driving.
Omg. I have my license and im really terrified when I'm on the road because I've come close to getting into car accidents because I'll slip into a day dream. People don't understand how much of a struggle it is. My daydreams trigger in the car when it's silent or when music is playing so im kinda fucked regardless.
Late to this video by a month, but MAN. So many of the experiences they described reminded me of what it was like growing up. From the rocking in my chair, the spinning and pacing, the hours spent looking off in the distance while I was surrounded by my peers.
I spent so much time in fantasy worlds that I was creating for made-up people in my mind. It's what made me dedicate like...6 years of my life to online roleplay groups and OCs. I was getting to experience my daydreams through my characters, whilst also having other IRL people with OCs there to interact with and validate my love for a completely fictional world. I practically attended an online school for 3 years, JUST because a character of mine was being used in a school-themed roleplay group that functioned on real time. I drew/wrote out assignments, I went to online prom, experience 'summer vacation'- I even enlisted one of my graduating OCs as a student teacher in their program and then I MADE the assignments for that class.
I had to work really hard to pull myself away from creating fantasy worlds and now? Without that escape from real life, I find myself all the more antsy, anxious, and depressed with reality. Maladaptive daydreams are no joke and it's wonderful to see it being spoken about!
You are an amazing artist and as one of your subscribers we appreciate you so much for pulling through.
@@_someoneonearth_ I second that
Wow. I thought it was an insane secret that I spent 1-4 hours semi-daily spinning and listening to music while making stories in my head or pretending to be asleep for hours at a time daydreaming. This is the first time in my life I've met someone who also does this. I got chills when I heard that one of them spins while daydreaming and anoyher lays in bed pretending to be asleep because I do both. I didn't even know there was a name for the world. Mine is usually a mha au
Edit: It is crazy how many other people have comments like me I AM ABOUT TO CRY I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE
Totally, you're not alone
Not alone at all 🫶
This is so refreshing. I know they say it's coping mechanism, but I had a great upbringing and yet was still a maladaptive daydreamer since I was a kid. I spend the whole day daydreaming. I never thought it was a problem because it made me happy, until it got so bad that when I did manage to do chores or have conversations with people, I would have to reenact it over and over in my head, and I couldn't control my facial expressions or movements well anymore. I would put off chores and showering for weeks to daydream. I'm more emotionally involved with my world than real life. Most of the time I would refuse to go out because I rather spend the time with the people in my head. I realized that I couldn't even live unless it was in my own world. Now I'm 20 and looking back at my life, I have accomplished absolutely nothing because of this, only getting my first job now, got into college but failed 2 semesters. Only now am I getting tested for ADHD/OCD/autism and all that junk, which my parents already have. Sorry for oversharing, but if anyone can relate, it's never too late to start your life. I'm glad people are talking about this.
hope everything goes well, i relate in many ways.
Same,I had a great childhood and my parents said I started the behaviors when I was 2. It is. A coping mechanism now for my anxiety and depression but back then, it might be from genetics of being an only child as the eldest child for a while.
I am also a 20 year old in college who has not accomplished must. Fortunately I know how to balance my school schedule to where I can succeed in it and daydream but I have like no time for anything else. Hope you do better!!!
Hey, I highly relate to this, and I was diagnosed with ADHD, anxiety and depression this year, and treatment really helps.
I was exactly the same, my childhood was great, but I was an only child with social difficulties (I'm still suspected ASD.) I was really bad through primary school and middle school, to the point of being on holiday in Indonesia for 3 weeks, and I have 0 memories of the trip outside of my daydreams, or wanting to daydream, because I literally locked myself in my hotel room the entire time. And I have loads of experiences I missed out on because I prioritised daydreaming instead of real life. However, it has been greatly reduced since I started treatment, and since I went on medication. I also found my own distractions to take control of my daydreams, like writing a 'book.' I make myself write stuff down, and engaging in my daydream in a way that makes me think and analyse it and clarify it means I'm less likely to think about it while I'm meant to be doing other things.
I've had some struggles like that as well. I had a great mom, and I've noticed the times in my life where I've daydreamed the most is when my social anxiety or health was bad. I do it less now, and I'm not attached to any characters, in fact I make most of my characters the opposite of who I am because it makes things interesting. It makes me wonder if I fit on the spectrum or not, since I there are times where I comes and goes but with my health being bad lately I've been doing it more often.
Sending love
One common theme I’ve noticed about maladaptive daydreaming is Music and Pacing. Those are the two things that can allow you ignore the outside world and allow you to imagine a different one.
I’m a maladaptive daydreamer and it only happens to me when I’m listening to music and pacing. So much so whenever I listen to music, I always try to walk in some way or fashion. I never sit down and listen to music because most of it is spent daydreaming with motion and sound blocking everything out.
Are you diagnosed?
yes! music is a common stimulus for daydreaming and a lot of people daydream most when they listen to music, and its like a need to have it there.
pacing is a common action when daydreaming, along with rocking nd spinning. personally I pace too, I'll have my headphones it, phone in my hand and I would just pace for ages. so walking activities are good!
I’m not a maladaptive daydreamer but I love pacing and listening to music while I daydream. Car rides too.
@@GirlDo3 maladaptive daydreaming (as of now) has not been recognized as a diagnosable illness. it's often acknowledged as a symptom of other mental illnesses though (ADHD especially).
In the car - looking out the window and the pace of the passing scenery is the same as my mind, that’s where it’s strongest for me.
I had to stop daydreaming so much. It had me isolated in my room, day after day... for hours. The compulsion is so strong. I do love it tho...
did u quit it
How did you STOP? It's been lifelong for me since the age of 7.
i used to schedule “pretending” into my days
1. fold my laundry
2. do my homework
3. do some pretending
I don’t think I’ve ever seen a video about a “disorder” where 95 % of the comments are people that have that same diagnosis. I’m really surprised that I’ve never heard of this before!
I definitely day dream way more than neurotypical people, but not this much I’ll admit.
Same
@@devon4357 me too but not as much as this and it's probably because of my ADHD
as a person who has struggled with this for 6 years, i can tell you that i only found out within the past year that it was an actual thing with an actual name
Ngl i know some of the comments are very genuine with this condition, but im 100% sure a lot of people just "found out" they have it
@@Thegenderfluiddinosaur _when you have (potential) ADHD and maladaptive daydreaming:_ **P A I N**
As someone who has Maladaptive Daydreaming Disorder, I am literally crying wth it makes me so happy that this was posted and awareness is FINALLY being spread
I had no idea what MD was but I remember in college I kept telling a depressive friend to just escape in her head like me and she just didn’t know what I was on about ! Same as the girl in the video, I realised I had a problem when my first child was born. Ever since, I make a conscious choice not to daydream every time the compulsion arises, which is rarer and rarer now. You really have to train your brain to lose the habit. Also I avoid certain types of music which make me MD almost immediately
As a maladaptive daydreamer, this video is amazing. It shows our thoughts, feelings, and experiences. My maladaptive daydreams have saved me. I can’t pull myself out of them, and it’s a problem. I interact with these “people” in my daydreams and it feels real. I look different in these daydreams, and it genuinely shocks and scares me when I realize I don’t look like that.
It’s like a movie in my mind, in my brain. While I’m daydreaming, I rock back and forth. My mind can’t stop, and it’s terrible. I love these universes. These universes are my world, my life. I love it. But, it hurts. I can’t stop. I can’t think without thinking about these universes, I can’t stay in the moment. I’m completely enamored with these universes and it’s destroyed me. But, I love it. It’s addictive. And, I can’t stop it.
I have a future ahead of me. I have a career ahead of me. Someday I’m going to graduate. Someday I’m going to go to college. Someday I’m going to go into the military. And I’m terrified of ruining that.
Who are these people?
I'm still embarrassed to talk about this to people, it really took off after my father passed when I was 10 and the first time I told someone I was in middle school. I could tell they thought it was weird. I didn't tell anyone again til I was in college to my therapist. I still feel like they brushed it off as harmless but it does affect me especially academically. The amount of times I would zone out into these worlds during tests, hw is a huge struggle and I only manage because I have to constantly work on it on and off til the deadline. So many things everyone has said in this video made me feel so valid. The comment section as well, I don't feel alone.
You're in good company in these online communities. 💛
I feel like maybe some meds could help? Like the woman at the end of this video said...so maybe that would be an option to try for you too. But dont be embarrassed cause i think many people would understand. because alot of people do a lighter version of it , so its understandable how it would feel and effect you if you had a more intense version of it...
I nearly cried when I got this notification, I was in disbelief. Haven't watched it yet but I am so glad something I have that doesn't get a lot of recognition is in a video with my favourite youtuber! Thank you Anthony for always doing a fabulous job.
I felt the exact same wayy
It’s so comforting to see that our disorder has been finally getting some recognition, and gets to be discussed. I’ve spent so many years thinking I was alone in it, and to see my struggles being validated is such a relief.
I feel like this too, I always see his videos and think nice representation for them! Now it’s something connected to me and I can’t even explain now I feel
i have been daydreaming like this for years now, i used to have this weird habit:
whenever i listened to music and daydreamed, i would slide across my room/walk around or just make some kind of movement while day dreaming
when i became a teenager i started to feel REALLY insecure about it so i forced myself to not do it anymore
Hey, I do that sliding and walking thing too!
As for me, I’m very attached to my DDCs (daydream characters). They’re like family now, they’ve all grown and it’s like they’re something that’s taken a life of their own
I think making movement while daydreaming is quite common. That's not weird.
Yea!! I constantly try to walk for hours on end just so I can daydream. But when I don’t go on walks, I slide and jitter and move
Holy shit me too and depending on the song would be the theme of my day dream. I haven't gotten help yet cuz I'm not sure if I even wanna stop
I’ve always been very in motion during my daydreams and have stubbed my toe or hit my hand more times than I can count 😭
I am autistic and i also have maladaptive daydreaming (which is linked with my autism). Since I don’t like change, the story line in my head is the sameee storyline I’ve had since I was six years old. I’ve added characters, changed their names, figured out how they look, what they do for a living, their birthdays, etc. I think my brain purposely made these relationships in my head the most positive they can be because of my toxic irl household, and sometimes when I need to calm down or talk a moment to myself, I daydream about them. the daydreaming lasts hours. days. months. It never stops… to the point where now, when I go to a store and see something that reminds me of one of the characters, I say “oh I should get that for __” even tho they aren’t even real 💀💀
I love the "I spent a day series" because it has taught me about so many different types of people and their experiences.
My characters are like friends that I can’t reach. They don’t know I exist but I know they exist and I care for them so much! I cry whenever something bad happens; when characters die, when they have a breakdown or when they’re going through a bad experience. I try everything in my power to make sure my four main characters aren’t hurt and even still Eclipse or Matthew always manage to get hurt the most. Probably because I focus on them a lot. I love them so much and hopefully I’ll be able to show other people how much I love them too
@@-bugbite who cares like genuinely. they didn’t even ‘claim’ anything
@@-bugbite you need to stop gatekeeping people. They didn't even mention any diagnosis, just shared their experience. Be kinder.
Maybe you could write a book or a movie about them so the world can know and love them like you do
Thank you guys :)
write a book or something, please.
Holy fuck I felt a drop in my.stomach when the lady talked about wasting the important years when you're supposed to be socializing and preparing your life on daydreaming. I've since taught myself social skills and I'm slowly catching up with school and stuff but it's clear I'm behind my peers. It fucking sucks and I often wonder how life would be if I had spent all the time I spent in my imagination on having actual experiences. Thank you Anthony for being so understanding ❤️
SAME!! 37 and this is the 1st time I've EVER heard any1else ever mention anything like this!.... I literally daydream my life away 🙄
I didn't know what maladaptive daydreaming was until recently, I would spend hours daydreaming really emotional and action packed scenes for characters I had made up or expanded on, and it got to the point where I'd just lay in bed for most of the day just day dreaming. I would always choose that over spending time with people, or people would talk to me and I'd just go into my daydream, it got pretty disruptive for awhile. Cool to know it's an actual thing and I'm not the only one
It bothered me a lot when i was in 10th grade. I couldn’t focus, i was always daydreaming; i had my own world. It was the first thing i did after waking up and the last thing i thought of before sleep
1:27 mine exactly started like that. My case is so so so similar to Levi’s
How did you stop?
@@goddessciara8343 it didn’t stop, just became less severe
hi, can have ur insta or something? , bc I need friend who feel the same
This makes me realize how lucky I was to realize this was a problem when I was about 15 years old after I stayed in bed until 5:30pm without realizing because I was daydreaming. I still struggle with this but I do not allow myself to lay in bed or to sit for hours and be in my head. I did not realize this was even a labeled thing until about a month ago. Thank you for covering this.
Thank you for sharing :) If you need tips, my channel is dedicated to spreading awareness and speaking on this condition. Don't hesitate to ask!
same I’ve had really similar experiences staying in bed until hella late in the day just laying with my eyes closed completely awake
Similar here
My furthest memory of recognizing this was I remember I thought since I was going into 6th grade I need to stop daydreaming if I want friends
I never stopped
And I have friends 😂
Me too, i used to just go to bed or sit somewhere in the middle of the day and daydream for 3+ hours just making scenarios in my head, or before sleep till early in the morning. I still do that sometimes but just for few minutes
I didn't know it was a thing until now. I would literally spend hours daydreaming stuffs and creating stories and living in it. Its really fun and relaxation for me. I think maybe it's time for me to stop.
I used to do the walk round in circles thing for hours when I was growing up, and this makes so much sense. And as a trauma response makes even greater sense
I didn’t know that the walking in circles was a common thing. It was rare I was able to, but I definitely paced.
Damn, I still do it
I’ve been pacing in circles since I was able to walk 🥲
I spin in circles in a swivel chair and daydream
I think I’ve always been like this, especially because I grew up alone. When I was a kid, I barely played with other children so I would create stories in my head. A new story everyday, but only when I was alone. Moving to the United States, restarting my life, and being alone again made realize how I began to daydream again like when I was a child without doing the chores I was supposed to do. Most of my stories include people I know, or how I want my life to be.
This shit started when I found fanfic at 12 years old. Now I 25 and homeless. Yall be safe out there
As someone who finally discovered that “Jacob’s thing” was something that other people dealt with too last year, I’m glad to see this video pop up. As always, you handle the guests with care Anthony and I really appreciate that. Thanks Anthony.
@@Imhighandhungry how does someone "promote" mental health issues lmao. More like showing people that there are more people out there like them making them feel human again and encouraging them to get help if possible
@@Imhighandhungry
Thanks for leaving we didn’t need you here YAY! ❤
As a maladaptive daydreamer with aphantasia, I think Kristin talking about how 'if she were to write it down' there would be so much just there, is really important. (I haven't watched the full video yet, so I'll edit this if its mentioned), but I write my stories down-and I think some people assume that everyone with MD has one story, or that if they have multiple stories they're all based off of TV shows/books/life events-so its really easy to write. But its so hard to write or tell, because what I can think about cannot translate into words. Anyways that's my rant.
:)
Yeah my way of daydreaming is by "acting it out". In my teenage years I used to do the same as the people in the video with just "sleeping", but then I started craving for more and now I act. I'll just be alone in my room and act what I'm daydreaming about, so sometimes I stand for 8 hours long in my room talking to the walls. And sometimes its the same daydream, but often I have multiple kind of dreams, not just one world. That was my rant😂 I hope one day (if you are struggling with it) that it becomes better
That’s a really dope combo
@@acfamily1513 SAMEEE
I'm extremely confused as to how it's possible to daydream with aphantasia? When I do it, it looks like a film in my mind's eye...
@@shadowscribbler6100 It's easier for me to daydream if I already know what a setting or character looks like. If I have to come up with something from scratch, that's when I struggle with aphantasia. Like I can imagine two characters talking to each other. But the surrounding stuff around them tends to just be gray and unimportant space.
I love daydreaming, I love it alot but I never stop I literally can't stop. 90% of my life now is like being on auto pilot, I never stop thinking. I live in these fantastic worlds and create stories that I would love to share with the world but I can get so attached to some of the people and worlds that I create that I'm still grieving over them 6 years later
Same, but as long as your able to control it and not let it take over your life you should be good, I myself keep it around since real life is so boring .
I did not even know this had a name, I've been doing this my whole life. The walking around in circles too. The story has progressed and developed since I was really young and many times have disrupted many things like school or work or even just making friends I always feel annoyed if I have to switch off the daydreaming and actually talk to people, I feel content enough with the characters and friends in my head which ultimately has ended up with not being able to make real in-person friends. This is really interesting and thank you for spreading awareness on this I did not even know that others had this.
Do you ever pretend the person your talking to is in your daydream and mix them together?
@@los3r426 Yes all the time! Its to the point where I struggle to remember whether what the person actually said was really said by them or if it was in my head and if I made it up as part of my daydream. Ever since watching this video and discovering what it is I am starting to notice just how badly it affects my day to day and I can't actually recall what really happened only what happened in my head
Been daydreaming for as long as I remember. When I got diagnosed with PTSD the daydreaming just got WAY WORSE. Couldn't finish a movie or book in one go since some scenes just trigger me to stand up, grab headphones then just pace about the room, daydreaming. Heck, I'm even pausing this video from time to time cuz I'm imagining myself getting interviewed about maladaptive daydreaming. I now have tinnitus since I set my music's volume too loud 😀
Pausing the video in order to daydream, pls I’m doing the same right now 💀
Me in life but i actually do chores and stuff but preffer daydreaming instead of being close to anyone... In the end the only place where i'm happy is my mind, where someone would accept me with flaws and all, and wouldn't be alone
@@MC-gu1rx Same! Some of the content I consume just instantly triggers me to get up, put on music and start pacing to get lost in my daydreams
Omg yes I always daydream of interviews and stuff like that
You are just me
One of my favorites on Webtoon is called "Dream Constellation" it's by livys and it's about a girl who is a maladaptive daydreamer and the author is also a maladaptive daydreamer. Her other webtoon "Oblivion Tears" is pretty good too.
Where can you read it? it sounds very interesting
omg that sounds interesting, I love webtoon, ty, ill read it
Thank you love Webtoon too. Another to my list!
i don't find it :(
Thanks for recommending!
i’ve literally only told one person in my life about this thing that i do and i barely scratched the surface. it’s beyond comforting just to hear others talk about it
Wow. As someone that doesn't even have the ability to picture things in their head; I find this absolutely mind blowing!
Same lol. I can't even picture a dot
I can do that but I don't think I can do it like anyone else I feel different like everyone else's daydreaming and picturing is diffrent from mine idk though it just is weird I cant explain it
Samee
I don't have maladaptive daydreaming but I do day dream a lot when I'm in bed or walking and for me my daydreams are more a running narrative with only occasional vague visuals. So I'm sure it's possible to have maladaptive daydreaming without being able to visualise anything.
Aphantasia?
SO happy you did an interview like this Anthony! I’ve been dealing with MD for as long as I can remember since I was a child. Music and tv shows usually trigger me and then I enter into a day dream that often last for hours on end. Although I’m pretty creative because of it 😂
I relate with the part of it being triggered by movies and shows, when mine is triggered it usually lasts I'd say maybe an entire day sometimes half a week, so while I'm just existing walking around doing stuff it's all going on in my mind, btw your name is awesome.
I relate to you the most. Less the people in the video. I stop myself from doing this by going on my phone then I get lost in my phone. So it’s a lose lose for my time. Honestly need weed or shrooms to be more “normal” I’m better now. Honestly don’t know if this is what I have or something similar because this doesn’t completely feel right. I always say I have severe adhd😂
It's the same for me. I've been this way for as long as I can remember and I'm almost 29. I'm a bit better at grounding these days but I don't think I'll ever be completely in reality. When I was younger through my mid-twenties I was also obsessed with written role play because it helped me get the world and everything 'out'.
I relate so much to all of you here!!! I too have to go on my phone (mostly listen to podcasts and watch CZcams) to get out of my “vivid daydreams” -that I now know is a condition (my mind is seriously blown)!!! Omgosh seeing this video and especially reading all the comments is seriously a game changer…
SAME!!!!!!
I still struggle with this. I listen to music and come up with plots on the music, but I have to be up and moving jumping around the room. It's gotten to the point where my feet have started to take damage. If I don't have time to do this I get so overwhelmed and feel like I'll have a breakdown. I always thought it was because I was autistic, but others I talked to didn't have this experience. Turns out ot was this, even to this day I struggle. I worry about what my kids will think when they get older. Especially when they get older and wonder why mom doesn't want them to see. Its just feels like being seen naked when people see me during these times. What's worse is I don't know that i can ever get away from it either. It's become a comfort for me in a way nothing else has done for me.
I have literally the same thing except I'm not moving around where I play music during school work n I put off the work I'm doin to stare off n imagine a 'music video' to a daydream scenario n my head, it's gotten to the point where I get annoyed when people sing along to it n I'm just here zoning out. I have this worry n my head that when I start driving I'd be too into the music that I'd get into a wreck. It scares me sometimes so I only want my radio to be on somethin like jazz, it's more like background music n it's much harder to daydream to it. Idk if jazz helps with u, but it has with me I don't know why.
I did this my whole childhood I to my early 20s. I didn't need music but it started with a toy and like pracing around the garden.
I would do it any time I was bored and hid it from everyone outside my family.
Yep, I also feel very embarrassed when I'm caught daydreaming. I almost always have to pace around the house in order to daydream better, but if i cant move around I'll just space out, and my mom tends to be concerned and ask me what I"m thinking about. A lot of times I don't even notice myself doing it until I suddenly snap back to reality and realize I haven't started my homework or chores 😭 it's been a problem for me for as long as I can remember, but it's one of the only things that keeps me happy.
as an autistic person and a maladaptive day dreamer, i feel that, except i typically pace around everywhere and mimic the facial expressions or subtlety mimic the poses of characters in my head. my characters are a greater comfort than people would understand.
That's so true... Thank you, I never realized it was this. When someone catches me daydreaming, and I'm pacing or turning my head or something... I'll feel violated, like they caught me naked doing the most shameful act... I never realized maladaptive daydreaming was a thing before.
One night, I tried to quit by killing off the main character but I CRIED so much. I had spent over two years creating them down to their sad but funny relationship between their sibling, their facial structure, their clothing, and values/morals which changed overtime. I felt so attached!
Brief plot line: (u don't need to read lol)
Their personality changed from being basically an asshole but he was abused and was told that if don't create "sympathy" for the government by being a good person that they would secretly kill them, (only his immediate family and mine know). This made them feel depressed and very vulnerable. His mother is against the governments methods but his younger sister and his father are with the government as the main character was talked into killing his older sister by his ex (my twin) when he was 11. However when shown kindness towards the main character by someone who overheard the governments immoral plans, the main character reveals to have a kind heart which had been suppressed and buried on order to hide their previous trauma from being kidnapped (it's a common fact that they're a kidnapping survivor as well as younger sister and his ex but he killed older sister)
This all may sound like a lot but this barely glosses over the topics such as:
Slavery
Sexual abuse
Highschool experience
Bullying (by main character and to main character)
Torture
Domestic violence
Magic /Fantasy
Revolution
Murder
Strangely, all these impact the main character.
I've also branched out into taking the alive sisters perspective and why she despises the main character, and feels neglected (even though they are the fav child) and both parents perspective on their parents arguing about what should be their child's fate.
Now my life has been busier it has forced me to be able to turn this on and off but I do zone out at work when doing really mundane tasks here.
hi, can have ur insta or something? , bc I need friend who feel the same
My character is similar, slavery, childhood sexual abuse, forced to murder to live, forced to do horrible stuff to others but managing to retain his empathy for others into adulthood. In "todays time" he has been away from that abuse for over 20 years but he is terrified of his past being discovered so he does good things as quietly as possible, seeking to right the wrong he brought into the world. These days I've being playing out how his past is uncovered and he dies heroically or is forgiven by the public/his friends, I've being trying to finish the story for 4 years but this character has been with me for 10 years. I both do and don't want to let him go. It's so frustrating.
It makes me feel so happy and validated seeing how many people actually do this too. It started when I was really young after my mother passed away. I used to think that I was some kind of freak because no one else around me did this, but this video made me feel so much better.
I am not a maladaptive daydreamer myself, but I can somewhat grasp the concept because I often daydream about some original stories and characters. I hope people can realize the difference between being creative. thinking up characters and worlds, and having daydreams consume their lives
I hope anyone struggling with MD can find the right support for them
I’m confused on what makes them distinct with each other though?
@@battlequestvalley2416 Severity, effect on life. Daydrems aren't inherently bad, and the daydreams consuming the maladaptive daydreamers aren't any different. It's the way the person reacts to the action and how they create habits etc that can make it harmful.
@Andhowdoesthatmakeyoufeel In my case, the worst it gets is me starting to talk with myself or putting on music and getting up, and suddenly it's 4 AM and my half eaten dinner is now cold and looks bad, and it still looks weird after silently putting it in the microwave trying not to wake people up, and I slightly regret my life choices.
Luckily I was on vacation and I was free to mess up my sleep schedule.
@@battlequestvalley2416 medically we can assume too that brain patterns are different for maladaptive daydreamers and people who are just daydreaming
I don't think it's all negative. I haven't been diagnosed with MD but I'm pretty sure I have it, but just a really mild case. I daydream a lot and I have to daydream to fall asleep basically but it doesn't consume my life. It used to consume my life a bit but that was when I was 11-13 years old and had no life and no school work, so it consuming my life wasn't bad. If it was still like that now though, it wouldn't be great.
Anthony you are spreading awarness for things I didnt even know were a "thing", I have have similar issues and thought it was just part of my depression episodes.
But it seems very similar to this.
Hi, I'm glad this video helped you! If you have any more questions or concerns on maladaptive daydreaming, head on over to my channel where I answer some of them :)
Same a little bit, hard to not get lost in it when life sucks.
@@deimos589 same and it's kinda scary
Actually, they say that maladaptive daydreaming can happen to cope through other mental illnesses like depression and anxiety so you're not too far off
I daydream so much that i regret it miserably and hate my life even more and end up daydreaming even more than before.
When I had work after school in high school (pretty much just stocking shelves) daydreaming made the job so much more enjoyable.. It's crazy to think that it can get this far cause it seemed like a productive thing to me at the time because it made it so I could get through work and not feel so drained. I had the story in my head and I still remember it and occasionally when I'm in those environments where I have to do mindless activities I go back to it.
I'm so glad someone is talking about this. I'm tired of not being understood about it and being seen as weird for it. My MD often has me making facial expressions, mouthing words, and moving my hands as if I'm speaking. It first developed in early elementary. I was bullied and had no friends. I'd often sit alone during lunch and recess and just drift off. Of course, it started small and grew more complex over time. I wanted nothing more than to be anywhere else but at school. It didn't help that I grew up with the internet and had access to many fantasy worlds already. Both the internet and MD became such a prominent need in my life that I couldn't be a person. I'd isolate myself for hours and hours just so I didn't have to think about reality in any way. My daydreams are mainly first person now but sometimes third person. I usually just listen to music and imagine I'm performing in front of some cast of characters. It's always either in a high school, college, or a home that might be mine. There always seems to be at least one character that falls in love with my daydream self. I guess I just really want so badly to be rid of my social anxiety and just be goofy and sing and dance around. And I'm lonely and want attention. 😂 I guess I also don't think very highly of myself so being desired seems very... desirable.
Yup that sounds like me i even walk around while listening to videogame music...
This sounds so much like what I'm experiencing and I always thought I'm the only one I'm actually shocked...
Thank you for sharing your experience. If you have some unanswered questions, head over to my channel where I answer some of them and also offer tips on how to manage your daydreaming.
I learned about this term just recently, I used to think every person can do this and just most of people choose not to.
It definitely feels like a drug... I'm sometimes annoyed when I have to do something or talk to someone and I would rather daydream
Hi, if you need tips on how to manage maladaptive daydreaming, head to my channel!
Everyone can do this. Some people just have nothing better to do (myself included).
@@thisisanoldemaildonotreply7045 Well I spoke with my bf about this and he said he cannot do this, no matter how hard he tries
@@taonmi well everybody daydreams. And regular people daydream for that same sensation you get. but I feel that certain people get really attached to that sensation they get when they do it. It becomes addicting and can be a coping mechanism to a sad or boring reality. It will probably always be ingrained in you. That being said I don’t think it should be painted all negative. I believe it could become a healthy coping mechanism if you learn how to balance it. Stopping myself from doing it sometimes leaves me with a strange yet uplifting feeling that encourages me to get up and do something useful. But sometimes sitting down in your room and staring at your wall with a blank face letting your imagination run wild in your head can be the most peaceful and relaxing parts of your day. It’s a beautiful thing when you balance it and learn not to do it at inappropriate times. Didn’t mean for the reply to be this long haha.
@@thisisanoldemaildonotreply7045 you legit do not know how much your comment has helped me lol
I’m a maladaptive daydreamer.
I daydream 24/7.
It started at the age of 9/10 in boarding school. As the days went by, my daydreams got longer and longer. So much so that I’m even able to go to my world in my night time dreams and continue the dream of the night before.
It became a bit of a problem at college when I had to study.
I would study for a bit, slip into my world and then I had to remind myself to paws my dream and to study a bit.
No one knows that I’m doing it.
It’s where I get to be the person that I’ll never be able to be in the real world.
I’m here but, I’m also not. I’m there but, I’m also not there. I’m in between here and there. I don’t know where I really belong.
I have this brooo!!!! I’ve had this for 20 years and didn’t find out there was a name for it until I was 19 which was about a couple of months ago or maybe a year ago, and then I happen to find a Facebook group of other people who have it and a whole community of people on the internet who have this, I used to think I was the only one in the entire planet that had this condition until I joined Facebook, Reddit and other communities of people on the internet who had the same conditions as me. Thank god!!!
Glad you were able to find support! :)
I like to consider my characters “alternative sides of myself”. As in I would love to have this life, but it isn’t mine; but I do want it. I discovered I had maladaptive daydreaming at 8 (not sure exactly) and ever since it first started it has been hell.
Did I enjoy? Of course I did. After school I would love to know that my mum wasn’t home just so I could room around my apartment until she came, which was in 2h or so.
Although, after a while I realised it stressed me out. I couldn’t focus on my school work and sometimes I would cancel plans and things I wanted to do that day just because I couldn’t help the urge to go in circles in my room. I’m still struggling. My head hurt while watching this video just because I know how relatable and annoying this is.
I’ll never forget those moments while I couldn’t help myself in public. I tried talking ab it, but most people don’t care or say that it’s relatable to them as well and that I shouldn’t worry. They don’t know what’s like; I’m looking forward into seeing someone to tell me more, but my parents didn’t believe me when I’ll told them. And then they question why they find me in the middle of my room.
show them this vid?
This is exactly what i was experiencing too at this moment
this is the type of daydreaming i experience rather than fantasy stuff. i also daydream about traumatic stuff happening to myself often or people around me and i wish i knew what that was about. another issue about daydreaming about "a better me" was a lot of self hate that came with it. then i would start to feel like i deserved the negative things that happened to me even in the daydreams where i felt my life was better. doesnt help that i move my hands weirdly when i daydream and i used to get yelled at when i was a kid because my parents didnt want other people to think there was something wrong with me which also added to the self hate early on. this shit is hard to live with but im glad its getting researched more.
@@0QuinTessential I relate. Yes even I think something is wrong with me why do I daydream about horrible things happening to me & the other characters in my head. The situations I make up are horrible. I think it maybe to make me feel better about my own life but idk
And my father said only mad people move around the room in circles & talk to themselves. Are you crazy or what?
I haven’t really clicked with a lot of the videos Anthony has done, but this one was the one that got me. I suffered from maladaptive daydreaming from like 12 to 21 and while it did help me cope a lot, I also missed out on a lot of things as well. I’m glad it’s finally getting recognized as a real disorder, as it can be hard to live with. It also makes me feel validated knowing that other people dealt with this disorder too.
hii, do you have any advice about how to deal with it?
@@larissa-nn8ng Personally, keep a couple aspects of your life out of your daydreams, if it's possible. That way you're not stuck in those dreams forever, because there's still things that's worth living your life for.
@@larissa-nn8ng Hi Larissa, if you need tips on how to manage, please head to my channel where I may have already answered some of your questions :)
@@larissa-nn8ng My best advice is just to try and remember that life outside the daydreams is worth living. Try to find friends you can have fun with or activities you like to do so you have something other than just MDD to help you cope with your issues.
I may just have an overactive brain but i sorta do this, i walk around in circles for hours just thinking of story's it's lit
I had excessive daydreaming since i was a kid. It got worst when i grew up, whenever im having a problem i straighy away jumped into my reveries, i guess its a sort of a coping mechanism during my hard times. As im getting older, i started to daydream less and less, but it does leave me with depression, anxiety, and chronic insomnia.On top of that lack of focus, forgetfulness, and becoming so oblivious to my surrounding.
I feel like this condition is rarely mentioned(or is it me being oblivious again) i only heard about it few years ago after long years of suffering from this. Thank u for this video. Im still learning to adapt and overcome, to progress in my career and i have amazing ppl around me, and im thankful for that
Wow this is literally getting high by using your own brain to imagine and release the same chemicals heroin would. I was wondering because so many of these symptoms and experiences I related too and thought I did the same with drugs. That can't be easy, to know the thing that gets you high is available at any time you want it :( not to mention experiencing withdrawals. I'm sorry to anyone who has to go through this.
Yes before this video I always felt it adictive because it instantly feels good like a bite of your favorite candy, and you get moody if someone intercepts you while you're sitting staring at the floor or wall dreaming about literally whatever, when you're shy, introverted and an insecure person it gets worse because that's literally the only way you can feel excited since you avoid going out or meeting people or doing fun things, that is your amusement park or your rollercoaster ride, it's better the alternative reality you create in your head because you control everything that happens to you. You don't have to worry about anything because you do what you want to do, there's no imposible and if you don't like something you just start dreaming again and fix it. It's more than just a quick daydream its quite life consuming it literally takes hours of your days.
@@paulovemx2222 I never knew this was a thing. I've always been so embarrassed to tell anyone about this. For me whenever it starts its like a rush of good feelings, like a high. I started experiencing it when I was 13 and I never knew what it was. Now I have no social skills because I spent so much time doing this.
@@kiraholmes3123 I discovered it a few years ago but it started since I can remember especially teenage years, I haven't tell anybody either, it's not like they would understand what it really is, people would think I'm making it up, but if I can tell you one thing is that once you are aware of it, you learn to control it most of the times, though I still catch myself doing it but I immediately stop cause I know it will only bring disappointment once it's over
@@paulovemx2222 that's exactly what I've been doing. I try not to do it as much as I used to but sometimes I feel like I need to. People would always make fun of me and say I'm always in my own world and day dream too much. Now I'm trying to live in the now and stop doing it.
It really just seems like another type of addiction. Addiction is often escapism
I actually daydream a lot. Being in the middle of many stories, thinking about what would happen if id do something at the moment, meeting a new friend in my mind. It is sometimes overwhelming and I cant escape it now to be honest. This video is very helpful for me.
I have the same thing but I don't know if that is maladaptive daydreaming or just daydreaming?
@@o.d.a.t2367 maladaptive daydreaming is much more intense and is a disorder
I've been doing this since I was a child, this is so validating! It's not as debilitating for me currently as it is for the people in the video, but it gets more debilitating when I'm in a depressive episode. Thank you for putting this out there because a lot of people don't know about maladaptive daydreaming.
I watched this with tears in my eyes. I've been suffering for almost 10 years now, and I'm completely depressed because I feel like I've missed out on life. I'm 27 years old, and it feels like I've just let my teens and twenties slip away daydreaming. The more depressed I became, the more I escaped into fantasies in my head, and the more I escaped and lived in my dreams, the more depressed I became. I feel understood now. Nobody around me knew what I was going through, and I stopped searching for answers many years ago. The hardest thing is that I've become so good at pretending that even my real life doesn't feel real anymore. I don't have any fun memories in the real world, but in my dreams, in the world I've created, I have lots of memorable moments to cherish. But I know I have to go search for answers and probably seek help, even though I really don't want to because I've become so attached to that world.
as someone who has dealt with severe maladaptive daydreaming my whole life i’m so excited for this video
there’s not a day or hour that goes by where i’m not completely hidden away in my mind and it’s scary
i’m so glad for more awareness to be brought to it, i’ve been too embarrassed to seek help because of how little people know about it
If I do have maladaptive daydreaming it is definitely not as bad has some people's. I don't do it all the time but my default (when I am not doing anything else) is to daydream. I have different stories that I can differentiate between so I do have a sense of control most of the time. I do the same scenes again and again like a comfort tool - it is a mechanism for loneliness.
I'm 25 now, I've been maladaptive daydreaming since I was 8. I would insert myself into shows I was watching like Pokemon and physically act them out, talk out loud to the characters and I'd get attached to them more than my family. I still do it now (late at night when everyone else is asleep) and unfortunately they're the only thing I look forward to in my days now. Every new show, video game and anime gets added to my stories and my personal timeline, making it more complex. I guess an upside to my daydreaming is that it adds to my creative writings.
I'm glad to see this being talked about more and more, when I found out that this had an actual name I was so excited and happy and relieved that I wasn't just crazy
Same here!
Yours mimics mind a lot! Also I see Aizawa as your pfp so I feel like we also have a similar cast of characters 😂
@@delaneykeller1389 nice 👍😂
Yup same here
are you me???:$&: bc this described everything i did / do omggg
I had never heard about this before. Watching this I started crying for the first time someone managed to explain something I have been dealing with my whole life. This was a real eye opener. Thank you
I’ve been day dreaming to this extent for years and it was never really a problem until these past few months when it caused me to dissociate a lot. I constantly feel detached from reality and I don’t feel as grounded as I once did in the past. I love that he picks these topics and is genuinely serious about them.
I am a Maladaptive daydreamer, I often have the same plot for weeks. Oddly most of my stories end of “ending” pretty toxix. But most of the times I have the same characters and they still have their storylines
I've been having very similar plots for years with one character reappearing over and over again. I always change it up a bit. I don't think it's the extent of maladaptive daydreaming, but it might go into that direction.
I DO THAT TOO!!! THE UNHEALTHY DAYDREAMS!!! Tell me something do you also have ptsd and complex trauma? Cuz I think that's related...
@@isapheonix ptsd, DiD and adhd… god I’m a mess!!!
@@adrienlangdon339 I have two of those complex trauma anxiety and depression. Dude I wonder if toxic day dreaming is related to trauma?
The adhd and ptsd, just realized I should clarify. Btw ur not a mess, your a person who's healing.
I honestly felt so relieved when I first heard about maladaptive daydreaming. I use to have a wild imagination as a kid and I just never grew out of it. I’m consistently replaying shows in my head and adding myself into the story. They’re in my dreams, I speak out loud and act it-I thought I was crazy.
I do it too. I'm so glad to have found people like me.
Me too I just thought I was very imaginative.
Somentimes i would create my own cartoon shows in my mind
goddamn got caught dancing in my room to literal nothing 💀..
It happens! 😉
Let go of my MD for and got depressed for 2 months I had to come back to it I’ve been doing it my whole life and call it “my stories”
i’ve struggled with this for years and i didn’t know it was a thing until recently, i fr thought i was crazy since i thought i was the only one n knew it wasn’t just daydreaming and that it was a problem 😭 i’m glad people are starting to talk about it
so excited for this one. maladaptive daydreaming is something i relate so heavily to that it's amazing seeing u cover it. ty dude.
I'm so happy that i am finally able to put a name on this. Thank you Anthony. I kept blaming myself of being many things because i always done this, never been able to tell it to anyone because of fear. I'm honestly so glad to see that there are other people like me, and that this thing actually has a name. If you have this condition, please do not blame yourself, maybe look for ways of accepting it, and using it, or look for ways to stop it/avoid it. But never blame yourself for it.
This hit me hard…. I never knew what I called my “dream world” was actually my paracosm…. I had a break down when I was 16 when it hit me that that life I had wasn’t real… thankfully I had a support system with CZcams fans since I had a popular O2L fan page. They were the only people I’ve ever talked to about this side of my life/mind. But it was hard switching from a life that I lived from 8-16 and realizing that’s not the important world. What I did in the real world didn’t matter cause I had my paracosm where everything was fucking amazing and I didn’t feel much pain after a while from the things in the real world cause In my paracosm the things that would come from real life experiences wouldn’t have the same effect cause I was confident and had high self esteem in my paracosm that I never have ever fucking had in real life. Coming to terms with the fact that I wasn’t “Rachael” as I though she was and was literally escaping and I didn’t know what from was so scary and actually thinking about it now my depression started that same year… and years after that I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder where I haven’t really been out of my depression since I was 16 and that was 7 years ago….. okay Anthony you may have unlocked a new path for me to help myself cause I didn’t understand this. Thank you from the bottom of my heart
Glad you were able to find what you were looking for! :)
that was VERY interesting... never really felt that understood before, this feeling of waking to reality and feeling like you are missing a part of yourself. maybe now I know how to call my 'excessive' daydreaming properly.
I feel blessed that Maladaptive Daydreaming is finally getting recognized cause honestly I have been for 3 years and it’s out of control by now
So sorry to hear your MD is out of control... 💛
when I daydream I pace around and I can't see whats in front of me and something my daydreams are negative and make me sad/cry .