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3 Reasons to NEVER Say “Divorce” in Your Marriage
Today, I'm diving deep into the impact of the word "divorce." After being married for 20 years, I’ve navigated some rocky waters, and I’ve learned the hard way that saying “divorce” can have devastating consequences on your relationship. We never sat down early on and agreed to forbidding the word, but looking back, I can't help but wish we had!
In this video, I want to share my story and the three compelling reasons why you should never utter the word "divorce" in your marriage. Trust me, what I’ve learned may just save your relationship from unnecessary turmoil. This is real relationship advice that comes from experience, not just theory.
1. It Breaks Your Soul
Let's get candid here: the moment you say “divorce,” it feels like a soul-crushing blow-not just to your partner but to yourself. When I first heard the word come out of my spouse’s mouth during one of our heated arguments, it shattered all sense of security I had built over the years. Suddenly, all the shared memories, dreams, and future plans felt like they were dangling on a thread. The very foundation of our love appeared to crumble before my eyes, and it was a moment that broke me.
No matter how frustrated or upset we get during tough times, the permanence of that word can create a rift that can be incredibly challenging to mend. You’re not just throwing around a word; you’re giving life to an idea that can linger in both of your minds. My relationship advice? Opt for open communication that fosters understanding instead. Trust me, it’s much easier on the soul.
2. It’s the Beginning of the End
When you bring up the "D" word, it doesn’t just hang in the air for a moment; it plants a seed of doubt and fear. More often than not, it’s the beginning of a downward spiral in a marriage. During couples therapy, we learned that it’s essential to confront the issues you’re facing rather than using threatening language that implies an ultimatum. When "divorce" was mentioned, I noticed how our conversations shifted from seeking solutions to almost preparing for our separate lives. The moment we started to talk in terms of “if” instead of “when,” it felt like a countdown to the end.
Even if you’re feeling overwhelmed or frustrated, it’s crucial to remember that there are healthier ways to express these feelings that don’t involve a final destination. Discussing your issues with vulnerability can open up the dialogue in a way that strengthens your bond instead. Instead of saying “I want a divorce,” try, “I’m feeling lost in our marriage, and I need your help to find our way back.” It makes all the difference!
3. Now You Don’t Trust the Other Person
Trust is the bedrock of any healthy relationship, and once the word “divorce” is mentioned, it can create a chasm of distrust. Hearing my partner suggest divorce made me question everything I thought we stood for. I started to wonder if they had one foot out the door-if all those years we spent together meant less than I thought. When trust is compromised, the entire dynamic of your relationship shifts.
The moment this happens, both partners begin to guard their hearts, thinking, “What’s the point? They clearly want to leave.” This mindset can push couples further apart instead of encouraging open dialogue. If you’re looking for genuine relationship advice, one of the best things you can do is prioritize trust by eliminating any language that could betray that mutual understanding. Couples therapy can play an essential role here; it gives you the tools to rebuild that trust in a safe space.
In conclusion, my personal journey through 20 years of marriage has taught me critical lessons about the weight of words. Saying “divorce” isn’t just a fleeting statement; it reverberates through your relationship and can cause immeasurable pain. While it might be tempting to let it slip during a heated moment, I urge you to embrace communication styles that can foster connection and understanding instead.
Whether you’re in a long-term marriage or just starting out, remember: never underestimate the power of words. They can break your soul, signal the beginning of the end, and destroy trust. Love is a choice we make every day, and sometimes that means choosing our words carefully.
I hope you found this video helpful and relatable. If you’re dealing with similar issues or just want to share your thoughts on this topic, please leave a comment below-I love hearing from you! And don't forget to subscribe for more valuable relationship advice and insights on navigating the ups and downs of married life. Until next time, take care!
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Komentáře

  • @LinusWilson
    @LinusWilson Před 9 hodinami

    Just dump them and move on (if u ain’t married); never move in with a woman too; she isn’t into u; sex goes down the more u commit to a woman; competition (plus attraction) keeps most women u date friendly

  • @zeekbrickett8095
    @zeekbrickett8095 Před 19 hodinami

    No. Those are superficial reasons for the lack of sex in a romantic relationship with a woman. You are only touching on the symptoms and not the deeper and more principled reasons. You need to read Esther Vilar's book, "The Manipulated Man" for the real reasons.

  • @rayrwyr
    @rayrwyr Před dnem

    There is an important reason for denying s3x that is mind-boggling but true. It has been pointed out by Rollo Tomassi (The Father of R Pill) and I saw it in action in my own experience. Here it goes: She is cheating on you and she now considers her AP (Affair Partner) as her main s3x partner. So she considers having s3x with you as an act of cheating on her AP. Since she wants to be loyal to her AP by not cheating on him, she is denying s3x to you.

  • @rayrwyr
    @rayrwyr Před 2 dny

    If you are a Christian, then you as a man are above women. The hierarchy is God, Men, Women, Animals.

  • @davecopp9356
    @davecopp9356 Před 2 dny

    Thank you. Great video. Please post the link for the Testosterone video. Thanks.

  • @GiopoloMtl
    @GiopoloMtl Před 3 dny

    Great vid. Planning dates for mid week is a great idea. If she keeps flaking, no way she's interested, she will do almost anything to see you if she's interested.

  • @rayrwyr
    @rayrwyr Před 3 dny

    If she cancels a date then continue to work with her if: a) she presents good reasons, b) she apologizes, c) she proposes an alternative time. Otherwise ghost her and forget about her.

  • @MrDieselcumminspower

    100% well said, brother.

  • @SteveWKk
    @SteveWKk Před 3 dny

    Absolutely Tuesday-Wednesday-Thursday And if they go particularly well, she’ll be the one asking to see you on the weekend;)

  • @NapkinEdStern
    @NapkinEdStern Před 3 dny

    I like it going in the shit pipe.

  • @rayrwyr
    @rayrwyr Před 4 dny

    How to detect a woman (such as a gold-digger or exploiting seducer) who pretends to like you and giving off all such signals versus who someone who actually likes you (with no ulterior motive). I guess only time can tell. Also check if she faked her org*sm or not.

  • @Stephanieforbeshamilton

    God only knows who you're attracting, but decent women don't act like they always you have described.

  • @FrankHaubrich-kd9vr

    That's the truth

  • @Stephanieforbeshamilton

    It's not appeasing biological adult female women. This pronouns "thing" is appeasing to some traditionally deemed unstable people such as: men who wear skirts and want to be called Sharon, not Stevie or those people who think it's fine to identify as a tractor. It makes a lot of "average" people uncomfortably. Its disgusting companies and educational institutions have implemented it.

  • @edb7742
    @edb7742 Před 7 dny

    It goes beyond simp behavior, i.e., in the context of appeasing women. In business, people (men and women) who use pronouns, e.g., on their business card, email, resume, etc., are easily persuaded by what they read on social media and I won't do business with them. In hiring, it's an easy red flag and good filter.

  • @SteveWKk
    @SteveWKk Před 7 dny

    Can’t help but die a bit inside when I get an email from a guy named Dave…(he/him) 🤢

  • @danwelterweight4137

    Same women were dating guys who were older than them when they were in their 20s in their prime. The reason why they hate it is because it reminds them how they are no longer in the prime of their beauty and fertility And beauty and fertility is the most precious thing a woman has to give. A man's most precious thing is his social status and wealth. So a mid age man and young women are exactly at the same level of status as each other. At their prime.

  • @davidcave5426
    @davidcave5426 Před 8 dny

    If she cheated within a year, she was never yours to begin with. At my age, I won't tolerate that. I'd go for the annulment and once it's over, block her on everything. Never contact her again. When I was his age, I would have tried to make it work because I was brought up that relationships are hard work. But at no point was I told that in these cases, it's ok to leave. I have since learned that.

  • @93castle
    @93castle Před 8 dny

    If she confesses, I'll work on the relationship if she want that too. If I catch her, its over.

  • @93castle
    @93castle Před 8 dny

    Don't ask don't tell :)

  • @jans724
    @jans724 Před 8 dny

    1. He should drop her and never look back. He may lose half the house but he's young enough to rebuild and he needs to get rid of her. 2. No don't tell your channels name for a long time. None of their business and don't mix the work and women. 3. Don't "date"! Going for coffee or a walk is ok, but no dating if you mean buying them drinks and dinner. You can do that for a girlfriend but not a "date".

  • @Blaklyon0
    @Blaklyon0 Před 9 dny

    The only thing I disagree with is the comparison between Kevin Samuels the godfather And shera 7....Those 2 are nothing alike... Someone like her would gravel at Kevin's shadow... Kevin tried to help men and women... Shera only cares about herself...

  • @miguelg51
    @miguelg51 Před 9 dny

    Well said brother. Indeed attraction is not a choice, just because you like her does not mean anything, if there is no return of investment. Also, if she was into you, there would be 0 weird boundaries, akward boundaries mean lack of a connection. If there are weird boundaries applied to you, be masculine and leave/walk away/no contact, you are not her pet.

  • @baldbadass
    @baldbadass Před 10 dny

    i have limited my availability by coming off social media. im not acting that im busy im actually busy even if its not working im sorting things out.

  • @CountessLouLou
    @CountessLouLou Před 10 dny

    We’re not competing for your attention. We want young hot guys too.

  • @SteveWKk
    @SteveWKk Před 11 dny

    The breasts thing is so oddly specific, but I experienced it with my last gf! I also got incredibly annoyed with her running hot lol

  • @oakleyman9529
    @oakleyman9529 Před 11 dny

    I love your journey to become a better version of your self always I'm from Kingston bro redpill community lol

  • @animestarlord9021
    @animestarlord9021 Před 11 dny

    I've been on dating apps for 25 years. Zero dates from any app.

  • @animestarlord9021
    @animestarlord9021 Před 11 dny

    I'm in my mid 40's and only ever landed 4 dates in my lifetime. Washington DC ladies all say I'm too old to be in the dating world. The minimum standard where I live is that a man needs to be is: 6'2 in height, six pack abs, $250k minimum income and be very pro gov.

  • @olderdude5711
    @olderdude5711 Před 11 dny

    OK, you lost me when you said the young people are mature Good luck to you man

  • @ValNeuman-et9kp
    @ValNeuman-et9kp Před 11 dny

    I would say it depends on what they have done in betraying ,to some degree you cannot cut every one off who has done wrong by you we are all flawed , imperfect to some degree and unless we are Mr popular we have less of the luxury to cut every one off who has done wrong by us,we can in some cases alienate ourself

  • @johnperez7626
    @johnperez7626 Před 11 dny

    Let’s replace the term masculine frame with self-respect. If he has no self-respect, she will not respect him. No way around that. And if she doesn’t respect him, she doesn’t love him because you can’t love someone that you don’t respect. The reason she cheated ultimately fall on him he had eaten enough self-respect to be with her in the first place. had he not done that, he would either be gone already or she would see him in a different way. And so now that she’s done that, he must leave her because ultimately she will leave him.

  • @melios1967
    @melios1967 Před 12 dny

    You forgot #8 where she can push back.

  • @rayrwyr
    @rayrwyr Před 12 dny

    Did you talk to him and try to turn the enemy into an ally?

  • @rayrwyr
    @rayrwyr Před 12 dny

    One comment why Alexander stopped at the gate of India. Alexander had a hard fought battle with the small regional king named Puru of Punjab region. Alexander's army barely managed to win against Puru's modest army. When he met Puru as a prisoner, Puru was defiant and he demanded to be treated like a fellow king. Alexander and his generals were impressed with Puru's courage. But the next Indian king to be fought was the powerful king Dhana Nanda who had 10 times bigger army than Puru and his army was fully prepared and waiting for a battle with Alexander at the banks of river Ganga. The chance of winning against Dhana Nanda's army was zero. So Alexander's army chose not to die in India and started mutiny against Alexander who relented and returned home. It was a good decision because Dhana Nanda was not only very powerful but also brutal against his enemies. Source: Greek historian Plutarch's "The Life of Alexander".

    • @silverbachelor
      @silverbachelor Před 12 dny

      Oh wow I had no idea about this. Thank you for sharing

  • @stevenveganightowl12
    @stevenveganightowl12 Před 12 dny

    Hi Caine, just picturing the scenario of her on her fours & the whiff of smelling dirty ass from her. That is insane! I've never come across anything like that, and hopefully never will!

  • @sIMODINHO
    @sIMODINHO Před 12 dny

    "She will leave you" is by far the best consequences of this list 🎉 great content and articulation.

  • @d.optional3381
    @d.optional3381 Před 12 dny

    you simple males live such primitive lives.

  • @timothybogle1461
    @timothybogle1461 Před 13 dny

    Myron is not a guy to pay attention to. Michael Sartain echoes the last point about female friends.

  • @SteveWKk
    @SteveWKk Před 13 dny

    I can’t do the fucked up teeth 😬

    • @silverbachelor
      @silverbachelor Před 13 dny

      Oh right I forgot about that lol. One chick had fucked up teeth and it was the first and last date haha

  • @Stephanieforbeshamilton

    That's not being superfical - that's called having standards. Women view what you've said about your experiences exactly the same way when it come to men.

  • @Stephanieforbeshamilton

    Never asked or would ask a man to buy me a drink. Though, I do have a male friend who this happens to, and he does have a lot of success with women, and his response is always to make a joke out of it and say no, but you can buy me one.

    • @anonanon7553
      @anonanon7553 Před 12 dny

      Meanwhile this african guy approached me and he keeps offering to pay for drinks. I keep telling him no, no. All the time. He still does it. I feel bad. But I want to make him feel needed but not be a burden to him. He’s Muslim and in their religion it says that the man must pay for the woman financially. But then again there are a bunch of other rules too

    • @Stephanieforbeshamilton
      @Stephanieforbeshamilton Před 12 dny

      @@anonanon7553 That's not nice, has happened to me before. You don't want to be impolite to anybody.

  • @rayjustray4091
    @rayjustray4091 Před 13 dny

    Wait a few years, maybe 10. It takes that long to build trust, especially when 63% cheat after 5 years. Sad

  • @stevenveganightowl12
    @stevenveganightowl12 Před 14 dny

    Hi Caine, if she asks me for a drink I say ok, but I tell her she has to pay for the second round. If she says yes, that's the hook, I get to know her & she sticks around for the conversation.

  • @Littletime839
    @Littletime839 Před 14 dny

    You've probably seen those videos telling you to play hard to get or act "scarce" to attract women. Let's be real: that's a tired old playbook. Treating someone like a game isn't cool. It might seem like it works in the short term, but genuine connections are built on respect and honesty, not mind games. Plus, it's exhausting to pretend to be someone you're not. Why not just be yourself and see where it leads? You'll attract people who genuinely like you, not just a version of you that you're putting on.

    • @scottfulton267
      @scottfulton267 Před 12 dny

      I agree, and not only that but I don't want to attract the kind of game-playing woman for whom this would work.

  • @Littletime839
    @Littletime839 Před 14 dny

    This guy is a magnet for low value women

  • @edb7742
    @edb7742 Před 14 dny

    Nah, that's simp behavior.

    • @silverbachelor
      @silverbachelor Před 13 dny

      Haha well this simp behavior gets more dates and with younger hotter women than you lol

    • @edb7742
      @edb7742 Před 13 dny

      @@silverbachelor Hey, no need to get personal. That wasn't an attack on you, just my observation of that behavior, that's all. We can agree to disagree on that. Cheers.

    • @Stephanieforbeshamilton
      @Stephanieforbeshamilton Před 13 dny

      ​@silverbachelor not sure it's simp behaviour, tad transational and manipulative for both parties involved but also very funny 😂😂😂 hope your meeting more lovely ladies who take the time to sit and talk with you over their drink.

  • @SteveWKk
    @SteveWKk Před 14 dny

    47 here and do everything you talk about And the apps… (just 2) I’m having a blast and killing it! Also met some good friends that I didn’t have a romantic connection with.

  • @ValNeuman-et9kp
    @ValNeuman-et9kp Před 14 dny

    Hey you have already mentioned this topic,are you running out of new topics. Other past viewers asked you if your gay because of the way you talk and your body language.,,not trying to pick on you just saying it as it is .

  • @LinusWilson
    @LinusWilson Před 14 dny

    Only use the phone for setting dates (CW). Date multiple women at the same time non exclusively (RT).