6 Months Since Moving to a New City Alone

The end of February marks 6 months of living in Chicago. 6 months since I moved to a new city alone and it's been HARD. Come hangout with me as I talk about my experience making friends as an adult, making friends in a new city, dealing with loneliness in a new city, homesickness, and trying to find my place in a new city. I also share my thoughts on living in Chicago, getting through my first Chicago winter, seasonal depression, and what I'm looking forward to in 2024 living in Chicago.
- chapters-
0:00 - 4:30: Intro and Background
4:31 - 5:51: It’s Exhausting Being the New Person
5:52 - 13:09: Making Friends in a New City
13:10 - 16:10: Long Distance Friendships
16:11 - 17:34: Homesickness
17:35 -20:38: Spending Time Alone
20:40 - 24:00: My Opinion of Chicago So Far
24:01 - 24:58: Just Say YES
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#moving #movingtochicago #livinginchicago #chicago #makingfriends #lonely #lonliness

[@neelbasak08]

Really appreciate your perspective, Madeline. I'm in a kind of similar situation (just been a 1 year since I moved to a new place for work ofc) and its definitely hard to make friends like we did in our childhood place/college. People do have priorities as an adult and we have to put in extra efforts just to maintain that relationship which would anyways be easily built/maintained in college social circles. But I what found helpful for me was finding out people with similar interests, going to parks, book clubs, drama theatres (actually just putting yourself out there as you said). Although I haven't got many friends here, it definitely gets better day by day

[@madelinekateh]

Common interests is without a doubt the name of the game when making friends! Love that we are similar journeys, i wish you the best!!

[@midas__]

Great 😊

[@madelinekateh]

Thank you!

[@GigaKnightGX]

From my experience: making friends as an adult is something that is very difficult because by the time you're done with collage people have already made their own social circles and long term relationships (friendship related). who ever is left out after this age group are usually people who exhibit antisocial traits or who suffered from some sort of social setback like being isolated in a small town, bullied in school, too shy and just came out of his/her shell etc.
Also there's the fact that as we get older people start building their families and getting married and having kids and they slowly fade out of our lives. This is not by any means intentional but life is just this way. The only way to get those sort of friends back is having your own partner and doing things together as a group.
I think that for us as adults we will be having more casual friends who you may call situational friends. Friends that you meet at work, at the gym and those who are generally in the vicinity of you. They forget about you as soon as you get a new job somewhere else or move to a new place. I do agree with you that keeping up with your long time friends that you made through your educational journey or growing up is hard, also life forces people apart and this will require a lot of effort.
In my opinion the best chances of meeting new people wanting to make new friends would be people in the same situation as you, people who recently moved to a new city and are feeling isolated. When I was working in a different city the friends I made were all people who also came to the same city for work and are not from there. Lastly stay safe out there and good luck!

[@madelinekateh]

Such good points all the way around!! I for sure agree that finding people in the same shoes as you helps to create that common ground

[@cbiii9327]

M.H.: You totally got this…..Two Words Sister: Politics!
Hear me out: Ok, so although I’ve lived out West for over 15 years, I grew up in the geographical area that you're in now and keep up with what’s going on.

There is a lot happening politically in Cook County and considering that you're someone who wakes up to a clean-house, and goes to the Gym in the morning, that says a lot about your character (I do it too though, so I’m super biased).
Anyway, if the name of the game is staying sober....I’m kinda doing the process of elimination here…..but I think it works in your favor.
Bulls game to meet folks, gunna drink.
Blackhawks game…See Bulls above.
Concerts….gunna Drink.
Bars….gunna Drink.
Spring Cubbies games….Good-Lord.
Taste of Chicago...See Bulls above.
But find a political party you affiliate with (both need help), go to some of the local meetings and meet somewhat like-minded people and see what happens.
It is politics, so some of them might be slightly psychotic, but that’s kinda par for the course these days!
Looking great homie!!

[@madelinekateh]

Love all of this, thank you for the advice!!

[@JoeM-xy7gk]

For meeting people in Chicago, I recommend joining a rec league

[@madelinekateh]

100000% I have been waiting for it to warm up and im deff joining some summer leagues