Understanding the Dynamics of a Narcissistic Mother-Daughter Relationship
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- Äas pĆidĂĄn 27. 07. 2024
- Understanding the Dynamics of a Narcissistic Mother-Daughter Relationship
In this video we delve into a topic that is both complex and often misunderstood - the dynamics of a narcissistic mother-daughter relationship. This relationship dynamic can have profound effects on both individuals involved, shaping their identities and affecting their mental well-being. Let's explore three key points to better understand this intricate dynamic.
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DISCLAIMER: I am not a mental health professional and although I am giving tips and advice on narcissism and narcissistic behaviors based on my own personal experience, none of what I'm saying should be considered mental health advice. You should always consult your own mental health professional for specific questions related to your situation.
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My mother verbally and physically abused me from a young age. I could take the beatings, but the verbal abuse really affected me for years. It took me until I was in my late 20s to realise that I was liked by others. I could go on and on, but Iâm sure you have all experienced the same things. I thought she was my light, and it took me a long time to realise that she didnât actually like me. Iâve had nothing to do with her for many years. I felt very alone and unloved by everyone for many years. She was always comparing me to my âlovelyâ friends. I was never given birthday or Christmas presents, and I knew I could never ask for anything that I needed, even sanitary items etc. There was no one I could turn to. She also let her men friends be suggestive and very touchy towards me. Thank you for helping me understand. The best thing I ever did was leave and have nothing else to do with her.
Iâm so sorry, right here with you. Iâm 33 and I still canât run water without hearing yelling and feeling awful about it. âIâm waisting water.â đą
This is a life saver. Cannot put all that has transpired to me over many years from my mother. Finding your videos has validated everything that I have experienced to the tea. Thank you so much!
Thank you for sharing your experience, and I'm glad to hear that my videos have provided validation for what you've been through. It's incredibly validating to know that others can relate to your experiences and that you're not alone in dealing with a narcissistic mother.
Recognizing and understanding these dynamics is a crucial step towards healing and reclaiming your sense of self-worth. Remember, you deserve love, respect, and support, and it's okay to prioritize your own well-being.
Thank you for reaching out and sharing your thoughts. Your strength and resilience are inspiring, and I'm grateful to have been able to provide some insight and validation for your journey. Stay strong, and continue to prioritize self-care and healing. You're not alone.
It was always - you have to be the best, but you need to figure it out by yourself.
The hate I feel for my mother, increases with every single negative (encouraging, in her words) thing she says about me.
Oh the misjudgments of me. And criticism of how to act. And dressing me up âfor the appearancesâ. I would have rather shot myself in the knee than judge someone else. I had to learn in THERAPY that having an opinion about whatâs happening isnât judging another. Itâs a judgement call. I also couldnât please her so I gave up on trying. I lived out years of sabotage & married someone who was JUST like her. I learned to believe everything she said was a LIE. She told me I should be a nurse. She was right. But I resisted it for years! In undoing a lifetime of trauma. I learned to mother myself! And defending little girl me!
i'm 53 and my mom is 75. We had a family 'vacation' 2 months ago where we all flew in from different states (me, mom, her 2 sisters) and all staying in the same house. It was a long time coming, no one had gotten together because of Covid. So this FUN vacation turned into an all-out brawl, fueled by my mother's verbal & emotional abuse to me in front of her two sisters. It's what she's always done to me and they saw it first hand. She then was verbally attacking them when they defended/protected me. She did not like being called out when she was being an a-hole. Surprise, surprise, SHE'S THE VICTIM, we are ganging up on her, etc. SO, after that, I vowed I will never speak with her again. It's not worth it. She lives 1600 miles away and my brother, who doesn't understand what's going on with both of us lives in the same town. He's the golden child so guess what, they can have each other.
My narcissistic Mother is 77 years old. I lost my Father when he was only 59. He was the love of my life. I have only one brother and you are spot on with that dynamic. She is on her third boyfriend since my Father died. She is pathetically insecure and needy with men. On the other hand, I am smart, healthy and beautiful but have struggled an eternity with healthy romantic relationships. Thank you for the support. â€
I'm truly sorry to hear about the challenges you've faced with your narcissistic mother and the impact it's had on your romantic relationships. It's incredibly difficult to navigate such dynamics, especially when it affects your self-esteem and well-being.
It's understandable how witnessing your mother's behavior can influence your own experiences and perceptions of relationships. Remember, you are not defined by her actions or insecurities. You are strong, smart, and beautiful in your own right, and you deserve healthy and fulfilling relationships.
Seeking support from friends, loved ones, or a therapist who understands narcissistic abuse can be incredibly beneficial in navigating these challenges and building healthier relationship patterns. I also offer one-on-one coaching and have developed a narcissistic abuse recovery program that you can access in the description below this video. Your journey towards healing and self-discovery is valid and important, and I'm sending you strength and support every step of the way.
Nice content.
I believe my mom is a narcissist. It's been a very painful and long journey of realising that. I really didn't want to think that of mom.
This video, and another one you posted spoke of the dynamic if there is a brother involved, made me feel very grateful to my older brother. He really protected me growing up, he took on the role of my mother and father.
She switched up the roles between us over the years but we never broke loyalty to each other. He's a real credit, he was the truth teller. He never asked for anything in return and was super authentic. I hate to think what life would be like for me if I didn't have him looking out for me.
Mom has recently went on a war path of cutting off family members recently, who don't agree with the family mobbing of my sister in law. I set a boundary and said I wouldn't get involved, mom took that as "taking their side". I got a lot of "you aren't the person I know or raised".
A few years ago that would have really hurt me but now I feel good that she's said that. I stuck to my boundary and it was a simple one. "I can't get involved in this"
I worry she cuts me off because we have a 10 year old brother who lives with her. He's on his own with her. He's a strong kid but I know how well she manipulates.
I had my older brother but he's on his own and she's cutting people off from him and he doesn't understand why.
No contact sounds scary, I don't want him to be alone in this. He doesn't deserve this. No one would believe my mom is a narcissist, her love bombing is really effective. Hell I didn't believe it until I was 28!
I'm not sure what to do, I want to keep the peace for my little brother but she might cut me off. Any advice would be super appreciated, I know it's not loads to go on. There's a lot I've left out. Thanks x
I exprience and I agreed what you said .I stand st High Court and won the legal Battle by myself even I prepare.The reason I have no money I cannot efford as I am not richman.My lord my prayer help me Nobody above the law.
Our house was a stye. A literal dumpster inside. Trash, smells, bugs, mice. One was stuck on a sticky and I wanted to kill it fast. I was so small and I shouldnât have been left alone with it. I came running to beg her because I couldnât do it, it was suffering. She put it into a grocery bag she found at her feet and slammed it against the wall over and over without warning.. thatâs my mothers love for animals
Of course she blamed me for her dogâs death too- like taking her on the occasional weekend made her die of kidney failure. Thirst. Sheâd pee black toward the end and I would beg her to take better care of her. I lived with a bf and stayed out of her house, it was âherâ dog, they got one for my sister too. I got him out of there.. she died at 5 years old and I had a dream about the two dogs. I came for the boy and he lived to be 15 with me. Only cut short due to 5 years of diabetes.. and I had to do the unthinkable. đąđąđą theyâll never know the pain because theyâll never know the joy of love. My only solace. The moment I said goodbye I felt a sickening urge for revenge- that being I would never let them hurt me again.
Itâs hard because she uses my kids to get to me.
Keep them away from her!!!
In the real world, no contact isn't always possible. The solution is not as straightforward as you imply.
I think it is. Youâre the important one, and you need to look after you. It may take time, but you can only move on when you leave.
No contact where itâs possible. Anything else is superficial. You donât go deep. Donât explain donât complain. Notifications off if you can. Youâll reply when you feel like it.
nope. No contact is the way to go for some. When the parent doesn't want to work on themselves, there's nothing the child can do. Life is short, yes, but I do not deserve the abuse anymore.