Forgiving Each Other | Sharing Our Hard Conversations
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- čas přidán 13. 08. 2020
- We have talked about some of the hard conversations we have had over the past couple of years. We wanted to share what has gotten us through with our marriage and dealing with other family members. Let us know what you think! Like Comment Subscribe :)
Where it all began:
Our IVF Journey pt.1, • Our IVF Journey Part I...
Our IVF Journey pt.2, • Our IVF Journey Part 2...
Instagram, / _thecolelife_
Business Email: TheColeLifeYT@gmail.com
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My grandson was murdered just about four years ago. He was murdered 2wks after his 20th birthday. The murders haven’t been caught. His so call friends haven’t cooperated with the police. I know they know a lot. I’m been told this through my Holy Spirit. Its has been very hard on the forgiving side. Forgiveness is the key to a life with Christ. Thank you for this conversation. It is needed so much right now. Blessings and ❤️to you both and that beautiful baby girl.
Jennifer Kaufman I'm so sorry for your loss and trauma. God bless you and peace be with you❤
I hope you can experience the peace & closure you are seeking. 🙏
That's a difficult road to walk Jennifer. I'm sorry for all that comes with this traumatic situation, but I'm praying that you will experience the tangible peace of God as you grieve for your grandson. I pray wisdom and courage for his silent friends.
“May the Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace.”
Numbers 6:24-26
Lexi is so sooo beautiful. Greeting from Johannesburg , South Africa. May God expand your territories fam !
Agree. Hello fellow South African 🖐
First of all Lexi is so pretty second being in a interaccial relationship I want to thank you for this video.. Continue blessing us with your videos... God bless your family.
It's wonderful to see a relationship rooted and grounded in God. First and foremost that has to be a factor to even start the process.☺❤☺❤☺❤☺❤☺❤☺❤☺❤
I’m dealing with that forgiveness toward someone that I love who did me wrong and I’m giving it over to God because these relationships aren’t perfect and the main focus needs to be of self and relationship with the Lord and being grounded on a Soul Level with the Lord!✨🙏☝️🙌💕
Thank you my husband and I are intercultural just like you guys we have been married fo 19 years we live in NC and we have a daughter together and my husband has a son from previous relationship before we met. We love the blended family but we have those family issues as well. So we pray on it we try to not get involved in family drama. But my last 3 yrs has been a hot mess. This conversation has open a new light on what needs to be done. I love my husband we met online 22 years ago before internet got crazy.. I just cant see my life without him. I love yall keep sending us positive vibes
This may be one of the MOST insightful vlogs yet!! I am a Single Black Man who also happens to be Gay. And you can image have had to REALLY evaluate my relations with SOME family and friends! At 64 yrs young I have come a long way! Thanks for your wisdom and positive sharing/caring voices!!
A great convo, guys! So needed in the body of Christ, but also for everyone. God bless!
Much appreciated. As usual you display pure unadulterated and authentic insight into your family life. May God continue to keep you and bind you together with cords of Love that can never be broken. God’s richest blessings always
I know I've said this before but it's true... Every time I watch your videos I feel like am attending marriage counselling. I always leave with something to think about, or that I can apply to my marriage.
Feel the same way
I love how honest and transparent you guys are
I love you both. From Denise , London UK
You both remind me of a relationship I was in. I process things similar to Lexi and he processes things similar to her husband... Quick to forgive but really?
Self examination? Not so much. And I have to be more careful with my words!!
At the end of the day,
Forgiveness and personal spiritual growth and learning each other's hearts are
keys to a satisfying relationship.
I love that you guys openly speak about both the ups and downs of your relationship. It comes off very real and authentic. Wishing you guys an eternity of love and happiness
Lexi you look so good after giving birth.
It always good to hear you guys, very real and to the point. Thanks for sharing.
She really looks amazing you would never know she just had a baby!
This is how to have a mature relationship. This is mature love..
Can I just say why don't you guys start a podcast use anchor app it's so easy and we can all listen to these/this amazing relationship stuff. Think about it?? ♥️ Love y'all
Think that would be a great idea for them!
I sincerely agree..
When you mentioned you felt protective of your wife's physical safety. I felt that one. Yikes.
Deep! I was listening to Voddie Baucham sermon about forgiveness. Sometimes you think you have forgiven someone and one day you burst out of bitterness. It's really not a great place to be. Open to forgiveness because God forgives us for our sins and He never just hold grudges. Let's become more like Jesus everyday.
Why is your hair so gorgeous!!!! Amazing!!!
Wow, this is amazing. I justed did a Bible study yesterday on forgiveness. One thing am taking away from this video is self evaluate myself. I had a misunderstanding with my sister and I didn't talk to her for a few weeks. Once we talked, which was last week, she asked for forgiveness and I did forgive her. Thank your for this video and I know this was very timely to my life.
Cole life: A lot of times I hear people talk about forgiveness but it seems that they are blending forgiveness with reconciliation. I hope that you feel better about where you are because it sounds to me that you are in the right place and you have forgiven this person. You are at a point where your struggle is now with reconciliation .. don’t beat yourself up it is a long process and you’re going to get there. Keep those two points separated . forgiveness is one thing it means you’ve giving up your right for revenge. Reconciliation means you trust the situation well enough to bring them back in to your inner circle which is very very difficult and a longer process if it happens at all. God said forget so that that unforgiveness will not hinder you receiving your blessings .he didn’t say anything about trusting that person again and bringing them back into your inner circle. As I said don’t be so hard on yourself and jump ahead of what the Holy Spirit is doing in this situation ..you guys are doing very very well. I really enjoy listening to your post podcast on CZcams
I love what Brian just said about that there are layers of forgiveness that’s so real and it really is a process that needs to continue. Because depending on the kind of violation you really have to work through the issue through prayer and reflection.
I love the deep conversation that your family has on you tube I can tell you both are Christian and know the LORD, your channel is very refreshing from most of the mess that the other channels have , lots of cursing, lots of pranks, nasty words to music, and it's different from most of them on here, have AZA in more videos she is so precious and beautiful.
God bless you two wonderful parents and your beautiful Aza.❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
The videos are really helpful. Thanks for the advice in forgiveness, The Cole Family Rock🙏🏼👀👊👋👍🙂
' forgive our trespasses as we forgive those who tresspass against us'..
Patience
Self-evaluate
Be forgiving
❤❤❤
God bless you Lexie - love your homage to Mother Africa in that lovely necklace!
A very good video for couple I enjoy it very much
I truly appreciate the transparency of this video. Successful marriages and relationships do not happen overnight.
Take home for us , me going to God first and ask Him to show me myself first,before showing me others and being able to accept and deal with what God as showed me for me is a great point for me ❤.and am taking that,Thank you big time ,,, I love you big time .. all the way from Uganda 🇺🇬 East Africa ❤
Lexi is a Queen, her necklace 🙌🏾🙌🏾❤️
This is so true. My friend of 20+years said some things that hurt me so bad I just wanted to avoid/stop talking to her. What we have to assess is this. Do I value this person enough to hear there point of view? Is it possible to move forward? But with all this TRUST is the biggest factor.
This is the best truthful video of CZcams.
Forgiveness is the key of life.
God does not dwell where there is no forgiveness.
We forget that when you curse people you curse yourself 4 times see your fingers.
God Bless you guys for sharing.
You too are such beautiful people! Lexi, your gorgeous complexion reminds me of my mum. I am grateful you are using Jesus as the Centre of your relationship. May Jesus see you to your old age together.
Hello🖐 Cole Family, OMG it's so amazing bc we just talked about this topic yesterday after the service in our house, we are an interracial christian couple as well, we just subscribed to support you as well, GOD bless you!
I too had some evil things done to myself and the family. 14 years of evil to the point I can not seem to get over it. I would speak to God about it and at times I would pray and leave this problem at the alter. but after a while it comes back to me. I have to question myself all the time, am I a true christian because I can't seem to forgive. I'm so glad for you both speaking about this topic.Thank you so much .It helps me to look at myself as a christian to be truthful and to forgive. everything you have said is what I am going through. I'm angry. so pray for me please. I need a release.
This needs to be heard by EVERYONE! Soooo good! My husband was trying to help someone see another perspective on a topic and it was so unfortunate to see how unwilling they were to consider what he was saying. Thank you for this video 💯🙏🏽
You betta PREACH on forgiveness!!!! I LOVE you all’s journey 😍🥰 that 3-cord strand is a beautiful thang! #GodHusbandWife
I got to this vlog by mistake and I have been binge in it for 12 hours now, I am so happy that I found it, God had to lead me here ,you guys are ministers to so many people, think about it you can't reach as many people as you do in a church. I am 70 years old and I thought that I knew THE WORDS and wisdom of God, but watching your vlog has given me a whole look on every thing that I thought that I knew. THANK YOU for increasein my faith and trust in God, I don't know you personally but I love you so much for helping me become closer to my creator, I just can't THANK you enough, this is your ministry DON'T STOP PLAYING the world needs you, God does all things for a reason, you two are better and more knowledgeable then all the preachers I have ever known. I believe that God intended for me to find you for a reason. THANK YOU so much for allowing God to use you for this old woman to leave here with love, peace, trust and wisdom.
Thank you for being so open ❤️😊
Thank you once again for an outstanding and mature video. Lexi your statement toward the very end struck a chord with me. We're told as Christians that we need to forgive and to do it quickly but I appreciate you acknowledging that forgiveness takes time and it's a process. I have struggled with this because I too want to do a lot of introspection and understand myself better so that I don't make the same mistakes and understand also that many times I find myself in conflict because I did not listen to the holy spirit in terms of who I needed to be in relationship with in the first place .whether it be a romantic relationship or just a friendship. I'm discovering now that who you are in community with is critical to fulfilling your purpose. As people often say it's not about us. It has never been about us. Please pray for reconciliation in my relationship with my daughter. My ex-husband, her father is a narcissist and quite blatantly has caused significant division between she and I. She's a wonderful young woman and I know that God has a mighty plan for her as an individual and for the two of us as a mother and daughter team to minister to other mothers and daughters who are going through difficult times. The season of our estrangement has been very long and at times I grow weary. I have gone before the Lord and asked him to remove anything in me that does not bear witness to his goodness. I don't want the enemy to use me in any way to hinder her from a relationship, a strong relationship with Chrit.she has accepted Jesus Christ as her Lord and Savior at 13. She is now 17.Walking this thing out however as we all know is a very difficult and different matter. Please pray my strength and pray for her heart that as God reveals the truth of who her father is that he would protect her heart and her mind. Nothing is wasted in God and all that she and I have been through will be used for God's glory. Thank you so much.
Forgiveness is the one of the corner stones of healing! I'm working on the self and relationship(s) evaluations.
Thank you guys for this video. My hubby and I (I'm black and he's white) have been having "hard" conversations lately. And we tend to not understand each other and it always ends with one of us or both of us feeling offended. We never apologized or addressed our feelings afterward. As you said, we would give this little smile and end the convo. And that is not solving anything because when another one of those convos comes up someone gets offended right off the bet. I am more like Lexi and I feel like it takes time for me to really understand how I feel while my husband tries to quickly get over it because he doesn't want any tension and he just wants to see me happy. I will definitely take your advice. Thank you! God bless you and your family!
Such a great topic today. I needed this because I am struggling with a couple of friendships. The Lord is telling me to pause before just going into my flesh and cutting them out of my life. You gave me some things to think and pray about. Love your relationship and you beautiful family.
This video was for me God you are amazing Thank you God and thank you Coles for being Gods vessels
I'm so glad you guys touched on this I've been in this situation where a very very very very close family member said such derogatory statements toward me being I'm a slave for my husband and Essence because my husband was Hispanic and I am African-American and it took a lot for me to forgive this and to say this person is just not able to understand and comprehend my life and my choices and I had to forgive by the grace of God and Let It Go and I'm thankful that you guys brought it up and you put you always make sure you put God In the Mix to let them know you know forgiveness is hard but if you go through Jesus Christ if you would have got enough to give me some ways possible it is very difficult and I understand the situation you're in because I've been in that exact same situation and it is only by God's grace that I got through it so thank you for bringing this up I always thank you for bringing up issues bad have been a part of my life and that you guys are discovering and bringing it to the Forefront so thank you and God bless you and your family always💜🙏💜🙏🙏🙏🙏💖👣
Wise words from the heart. Bless you both!
Hi Good evening - It's so refreshing to see a couple who has that open communication with each other. This is what is needed in all relationships / family life, it's by communicating that I believe that problems/issues can be dealt with. That we can understand where our spouses/ children are coming from.
Brian - I totally relate to you on forgiveness, sometimes I think that I have forgiven the person unril some issue arise and then I question myself on it. I call myself work in progress. But I believe that as long as we keep our eyes on Jesus that true forgiveness will come and his love will shine forth. May God continue to bless you , Lexi & Aza
I really love what God is doing through the both of you...truly amazing....sometimes God just speaks to you through other people because I am also going through a difficult situation with my In-Laws and it has been quite tough and I'm struggling to forgive them and Its like God is speaking to me through this Video . This video gives me hope
Thank you for your prayers and God bless you and your family Always
Cynthia Tlitli from Cape Town South Africa
And your daughter is soo beautiful 💕
You two are so wise for a young couple of how to tackle anything so far that would come you way in life,! I think, there must have been a reason why god have brought you together! Aza is blessed to have such loving, wise and caring parent! When can we see the little bundle?
I’m praying for complete and total forgiveness. Keep letting the Lord GROW you guys...I love the openness you all have to hearing the Holy Spirit. Beautiful!!!! I’m teaching a workshop on forgiveness in October to complete my Masters in Ministry, so this is so important! God bless you!
Great vid. I want to be free more than be in unforgiveness. Lexi made some great points. Brian did too.
It goes deeper than this. Fear of rejection and styles of communication are learnt. Many whom others term 'immature' in their communication and relationship styles are struggling to unlearn how they have observed and always done relationships from their family lines etc. What I am saying is some patterns can be generationally passed down and only God's grace can deliver one from that. I for example have an avoidant style of communication and it has taken years and lots of work to learn to communicate with others but If you heard my life story you would understand why that is my communication style.
Love this conversation and it was so needed. Forgiveness is hard to give some times. When emotions get entangled and you constantly play back the situation that lead you to feel a certain way, it becomes hard to try to untangle what actually happened to heal not only yourself but also the relationship.
Congrats. I mean considering all the drama and stuff you had to deal with. !!!! 💕💕💕💕💕
Love this. I'm a person who got hurt a lot because of forgiving and the person would do the same thing over and over. I went thru a period where I wanted to hate someone who was truly mean to me, tried to take me out. I went to God and said why am I not upset and I learned of the Love of GOD I wish I could really get into this conversation but I'm typing. Thanks again, I'm praying 4U2
I think you both made many excellent points throughout the video. I totally agree that purpose, intent and constructive outcomes are key. Sometimes asking ourselves those questions can positively guide the process even in the most challenging circumstances. Hopefully the result will be growth for all involved!
Let me first start by saying, you guys are my FAVORITE CZcams couple!! Lol
And, I feel this way because of videos like this one! I can truly relate to so many of the things you guys discussed, especially having a similar personality to yours, Lexi. Unfortunately, one of my friendships is in a rocky place as you guys called it, to say the least! And, because she is more of the type to say, “okay let's move past the issue” in her life in general, even at the expense of being “happy and good” because she doesn't know how to address confrontation without it either being an argument or no resolution at all. So, please keep me in your prayers and posting more content like this, because it is truly helpful! 🙏
- ❤️ Kara
I miss seeing this type of respect and honestly in marriages these days💕
I hear so much wisdom from both of you. I am grateful to hear your struggles and hope you have overcome them. My husband died in 2015 we had been married 29yrs. We both loved each other, however family members caused a lot of pain. I understand what you were saying Lexi, I have forgiven them, but my thing was what do I do with the damage that this has caused my husband our children and myself you guys are heaven sent. God bless you and keep you and make His face to shine upon you and give you peace in Jesus name.
Forgiveness is really powerful.in fact, freeing or forgiving people can actually cause our blessings to flow to us. when I took away bitterness from my heart towards somebody in my church, I got baptized with the Holy Spirit. That's how come I know what forgiveness can do for our spiritual life.mehnn...God blesses us when we forgive others..God bless you both guys .very powerful subject.
Thank ya'll so very much! I love this...Ya'll are Psalms 133 indeed! 1 Corinthians 13 talk...I appreciate this insight and your experiences; I am in an interethnic relationship. ...so good! Truth...💚💙💜 Brian, that is wisdom to disassociate even though there is forgiveness, to protect your relationship and your wife! Little by little. The ones who are forgiven much love much. -Luke 7 Yes, truth in our innermost being.
I loved the video, very absorbing points! Thanks
So true, communication is one of the most important thing in a relationship to make it work.
So, true. Forgiveness is not done because the person has acknowledged his/her wrong-doing. It truly is for YOU.
This truly blessed me. Thank y'all....
Such a powerful, needed conversation 🙌🏾
Thanks for sharing this! Great and definitely deep 🙏🏾
This is being true to God, and yourself ❤😊
Love you all. Stay bless!! That was a very deep conversation. Can’t wait to see the new house.
Thank you guys for being so honest! You have such a great impact on young people like me 💖
This is such a great conversation! I’m so glad I’m subscribed to you guys! Thank you and God bless your family!
Deep...Deep.
Guys, I'm so impacted by this cov.
Thanks be to God who giveth & giveth again & again. Continue to pray about the situation with fam & He'll miraculously change the situation when you least expect it.
Thank you for this video. It was honesty an answer to a prayer I prayed. It was very healing for me to watch. Love you guys!!
I love this, I can really relate with this. Thanks for sharing. God bless.
Congratulations on the new house. God bless you both.
Spirit of unforgiveness keeps you in bondage. Blocks you from moving forward . Forgive Forgive you might look stupid or coward but Forgive.
This is beautiful, you guys actually do know where you are emotionally and spiritually, I love everything that you've said in this video and the honesty. God bless you and your relationship
You guys have such great conversations/discussions. Such wisdom and so insightful. Love you both💕. God Bless!
Thank you for sharing about forgiving strugging with my family withthe same topic be bless
Thank you guys so much for your wisdom. I know for anyone like myself needed to hear this. I am truly blessed with the wisdom given. God's love is everlasting. May God continue to bless you all. Big Love!
I truly appreciate the transparency of this conversation and I honestly learned a lot on this topic from you . Thanks
i love hw you are so understanding with each other wow you really know each other love you guys so fast
i only start watching ur videozis week
stay blessed
i pry zt God give me relationship zt u hv coz i see God in u
i pry zt u will continue be like zis and be more in future
Good talk (teaching). Many people do not know that unforgiveness puts them in bondage and keeps them there. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you very much. May God continue to bless you and use you as His vessels.💞
This was an awesome video. Thank you for this. Sharing a tid bit about me and my husband....he would always be the one to apologize to me after we disagreed about something, because he always just wanted to make me happy or smile, and I had to realize that, that wasn't fair to him, and I'm not looking at what I'm saying or doing, so I had to learn to put my ego/pride aside and realize that I am wrong in most of these discussions, and apologize. We've been together for 21 years, and we are always still trying to grow. We have to always be willing to open our hearts and minds, and listen, hear and be vulnerable, so that we can grow as an individual. Again Thank you for sharing you guys.
I absolutely love you guys!!! You two are like my friends/therapists all in one lol. This conversation really hit hard with me. Just when I thought I was a forgiving person, I realize that I now tend to think back on certain past situations and relationships and what I should've said or what I should've done instead what I actually said and did. I was thinking of how I acted in past relationships that, had I known all this back then, I believe those relationships would've started and ended differently. I'm definitely going to 1. rewatch this vlog a few more times and 2. take all that was talked about today and use those tips from here on out. Thank you for being so open and honest.
Very good conversation, and you are right it takes time plenty of patients with Gods guidance.
Love the conflict approach. Healthy info...
Timing is perfect! Going through this right now! Forgiving someone is hard but absolutely worth it. It’s the acceptance of the forgiving yourself that’s even harder. Expecting so much from yourself like I do sometimes comes off to others as having super high expectations which lead to disappointments and separation (he broke up with me me) in relationships. Thanks for a fresh word and perspective on something I have had to do time and time again. God Bless you two!
Yes! So glad you mentioned Counseling. Do many of us don’t realize our behaviors or thinking patterns are problematic until it causes us significant stress. Great content!
So much respect for you guys and how you show up in such authentic spirit. Appreciate this conversation so much ☺️❤️
Hi, you know this topic of forgiveness is so huge, am particularly happy about the part where you guys hint that knowing that forgiveness does not come easy and that you don't have to be pretend to be in a place you are not. I feel like often times it is easy to say that you need to forgive and yet there is a lot that comes with that. I feel a lot of the conversation on forgiveness has to change to hard and difficult but possible journey of forgiveness
You guys are an amazing couple.May God continue blessing ur union,lots of love from Kenya.
So Good To See You Both!!
😍😍
Hey, greetings from Jamaica 👋😁. Thank you so very much for this video. You have posted it at the perfect time and I believe God did that just for me because my best friend and I have been going through a really rocky moment in our relationship, especially for this week. You have made such great points and have simply reminded me of what is important in a relationship worth fighting for, thank you! God bless you.
You all are so blessed to be able to be so open about the issues you have encountered with other family members. And most of all learning how to forgive and do self evaluation. I pray that God continues to give you guys the strength and discernment to forgive.
Sometimes forgiveness is a journey. Stay on that path. I love you guys! Such a blessing and you both give so much hope.
This was an awesome session, I really appreciated this and got some Godly counseling. I appreciate how you let God use you!
Amen. Speaking the truth in love. Humble ourselves and take ourselves to the Lord first 🙌🏽
Very great advice. Forgiveness is key within any relationship. ❤️❤️