Dissociative Identity Disorder: The Basics
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- čas přidán 8. 03. 2024
- Hello! I was looking around at my stuff the other week and I realized that I had yet to do a short video on one of the most important topics of the channel! I decided to fix that! I 'd love to know what you'd think.
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A vtuber as an ambassador for mental health. Brilliant.
I don't know about ambassador, but I will always do my best!!
I'm always happy seeing more conversations about DID. I'm undiagnosed, but I'm fairly certain that I suffer from some form of OSDD, which is a 'less severe' case of DID. After a psychotic break that led to a dissociative episode in 2016, following a traumatic event and lots of unexplained and mysterious lapses in my memory, I became aware of the only alter I'm aware of. He told me his name in my dreams, and from that point on, offered to 'take the wheel' when I needed a break. I agreed, as long as he behaved.
for a long time, I felt like I was going crazy. Hearing 'voices'. Foggy memory of things I swear I never did or said, or not remembering things I should. Being told I did something, or said something, but no memory of it.
I was so convinced that I was just some nutcase, and that everyone would think I was some nutjob. but meeting someone who listened to me describe my symptoms, who was so understanding, patient and kind with me was such a validating experience. They told me that as long as my alter wasn't causing me or others harm, then i was fine. In fact, once I learned to embrace him, and let him 'help' me, I started having a lot less lapses in memory and weird dissosiative episodes.
In time, my alter trusted me enough to show me his internal world. It was a pleasent little attic with walls lined in bookshelves, piled high with books, curios, trinkets and knickknacks. Some of them were a mystery even to him. Along the west-facing wall was a big window, and it was always open with a gentle, warm breeze blowing in. In the evening he'd sit and watch the sunset, and invite me to relax with him. It was a place of safety and comfort I could go when I was especially stressed.
it took me a long time to reach a place mentally where I felt comfortable sharing my experiences with others, or even here on youtube, to a bunch of strangers, because I want to destigmatize a condition that's becoming remarkably common as our world becomes a place of constant noise, stress, anxiety and worry.
My 'alter' manifest as something vaguely human, with fantastical traits. He's a bit lazy, a bit of a flirt, and naps, a lot. I often had to stop myself from reacting to his 'running commentary', because sometimes it was straight up rude or inappropriate, but not in any sort of malicious way. Much of my trauma in my past dealt with CSA, and he told me eventually that his 'job' was to help me heal from that, and provide me the means to engage with those memories in a way that I could recover from. He really did help, a lot. Before he 'awakened' in my mind, I struggled to connect to anyone sexually, which really hurt my romantic life. He also helped me reconcile with the idea that I was polyamorous. Can't thank him enough, even if he's 'all in my head' :p
Hope my little experience here resonates with others, or gives others some insight into what its like to be someone with DID/OSDD. ^^
My bf is the host of a system and I hang out in a lot of system-friendly states, but could never fully understand. Thanks for breaking this down to be a bit easier to understand, your videos are really helpful ❤
You are so welcome!
Thank you for getting accurate information about this out there.
My ex wife had severe undiagnosed D.I.D., over a hundred trauma bearing personalities. The only reason I figured out what was going on is because of the community around a book by Brandon Sanderson; The Way of Kings. One of his characters has D.I.D. and he did his diligence by consulting people with the disorder. Some people where discussing it, and I was able to put two and two together.
I tried my hardest to help document each personality and the trauma they held. I genuinely and platonically loved some of them. But we split after she herself cheated multiple times and left on her own. She also has B.P.D. which from what I've read has the same cause as D.I.D.
I've had a couple friends that have DID and I'm glad more videos about it are being made bc I know it's very stigmatized. I remember every time it was brought up for a while, a different friend mentioned how "it's not truly proven to exist" but learned to stop dismissing people's mental health experiences.
So im fairly sure I dont have DID but can relate to a lot of the dissociative stuff, especially fragmented memories.
I've found my memories seem to be grouped by mental state (stress, depressed, happy, excited etc), where I can much easier remember stuff from the past in the "group" of my current mental state, and harder to remember things in the other groups.
So while stressed i can recalled memories easier from other times ive been stressed, or happy from other times im happy, etc. but its like theres a blur or the other memories. And its not that im "losing the memories" I just need to be in the matching mental state to recall them easier.
Is weird, because I'm pretty sure I had DID when I was little, it took me a while to realize that I had different ways to act between different environments but to a degree that was way too extreme to consider normal, not to mention that I had low self-esteem and no sense of identity. Once I realized that I just embraced as a way to cope with things and I left it at that, I was this way for a long time seeking refuge in my mind leaving other parts of me to handle things I was incapable to deal with, considering those parts of me to be really close. Long story short I remember some of them speaking about uniting ourselves again and "I" was against the idea but after going to sleep and waking up I couldn't left someone else take control anymore so I got frustrated but then I "remembered" from their POV when they spoke with each other that I was ready and that they wanted me to live my life so I just accepted that since I want to think that instead of leaving they are part of me again. Since then I haven't had any of them come back but I have the feeling that if things go really bad they may show up to help, I hope it doesn't happen tho I want to deal with this things myself.
Nice video, love the idea of a mental health VTuber! Looking forward to seeing more from you ^^
thank you, bunny
You're welcome 😊
so cool to see another educational vtuber show up in my recommended :o subbed and can't wait to see what you have planned !
Thank you so much! I'm so happy the internet is out here to connect us! I'll give you a sub too! I hope you have a lovely day and please remember to drink water and take breaks
Thanks for the Video on this topic star! It was very clear and concise so it's easy to understand for many without going into the technical terms I hope that it reaches the wider audience
Thank you Maizy!!
Excellent video!
Thank you for explaining this, as well as the parts about disassociation specifically, I’d like to have a better understanding of these things so that, if I need to, I can keep track of them.
Honestly I’ve always found DID fascinating, ever since running into pop culture representations, and later doing the actual research and meeting online friends with it. It’s confusing why such an interesting disorder is so little understood, but then again that pop culture thing might actually be a detriment, similar to psychopathy and that whole can of worms (yuck). Honestly, for all kinds of disorders I really hate how under researched they are. Maybe it’s just my personal interest in them though
found this video while scrolling and i just wanted to stop by and say hi! found it to be very simple to understand the way you put it and your voice sounds lovely!
Thank you! >w
I know this is a very serious video and I'm glad you've broken it down so succinctly 💜 but I wanna share a goofy moment I had yesterday.
I am partial as in I, Tangle take control of the meat suit 99% of the time and the others only really provide commentary. So PDID. I'm not diagnosed but I saw a psych and she did the test and said I do seem to have it.
So anyways, I was eating a fancy meal with my mom when the topic of coriander came up. Most of my alters are fictives and American. So Napoleon asked me what I was talking about and I offhandedly mentioned that it was what we call cilantro. Next time I start talking to my mom I call it cilantro and I didn't even realise until a minute later. So that was fun.
Thanks for this video, I'm definitively gonna save it for in case I ever need to explain this.
Ty
its good for more people to come forward and talk about this.
I'm so glad the algo sent me! Mental health and VTubers are both important to me so I'm thankful you are talking about this. 🙏
For me it was less being diagnosed with things and more "I wonder how my mind is going to cope this time!".
I'm so so happy that you resonate with my content! Having a diagnosis felt like a prision sentence for life in a way, but I no longer see it that way. Wondering if your mind can cope with the next thing is very very real.
i dont have much to say as im personally really awful at leaving comments in general hgjjhggh
but i just wanted to let you know that i appreciate this video
Thank you so so much! I am so glad this video was of help to you! Please take great care of yourself ❤
thoughts; this is like very accurate to scientific understanding of DID.
you kinda covered all the basics on that.
but i would like to hear some of your own personal experiences with it also ^^ like its all accurate buti kinda had a hard time relating to science descriptions of it
it early on ..and like actual DID systems descriptions of their day to day experience was a bigger thing ..
You're absolutley right! Once I gain a big enough following, or I just have a following that isn't shy about questions and the amount of them I'm planning on doing a Q and A Stream!
Would you be willing to ask quite a few? I'll make a community post for such questions if you think there would be a lot 😊
Very interesting and informative video, I enjoyed it. Keep up the teaching and videos!
More to come!
Thank you for the information I didn't know what D.I.D was. I hope to learn from you and also enjoy the videos/shorts you make.❤😊
sending star many many hearts
Straight into it, w
my therapist straight up was like "you got like an actual personality disorder going on-" cuz ive been aware of the other consciousness in my brain but they feel like actual different people. they identify as different people/creatures from me. but then i have actual personality changes where im still me but a different person?? im aware when the other consciousness are affecting me but during the dissociation changes i dont remember much. i switched when i was with a friend one time recently and he told me and i was like oh nooo. dissociation makes my head hurt they all say i squeeze my eyes really hard for a while before i switch so at least i get a warning
I'd like to note that DID is NOT a personality disorder, but a dissociative disorder, hence the name dissociative IDENTITY disorder. It has a lot more to do than just someone's personality, though for things like BPD, dissociative barriers may be higher between the emotional states (though these are not alters, say compare to this somewhere about PTSD parts where while they're dissociated, they have no sense of self or autonomy separate from anyone else. Its mors like 1 person with more dissociated parts compared to multiple identity states who make up one person, though mostly with their own sense of self and ability to do things outside of one another.) can present or be similar to what it's like for two alters or more to be in a system, but good questions to ask to differentiate are)
1. Can you communicate to them?
2. Does it feel more like you but dissociated, feeling intense emotions, but someone else? I think there is a kind of difference in feeling that can present as "This doesn't feel like me"(with the lack of another alter, so this is just dissociated parts more like, though the different between all of these is the level of dissociation and once again whether or not these parts have autonomy or anything outside of who you are) VS "This doesn't feel like me AND it feels like another person" which might be a bit more indicative of an alter.
3. Although in times of extreme stress such as black-and-white thinking, flashbacks and similarly it can really feel like another person, but it's still YOU doing those things it's just higher levels of dissociation between these parts compared to say someone without PTSD, and less dissociative barriers and no autonomy between parts compared to someone with DID.
ALL alters have personalities. Alters are not different personalities of a person, but multiple identities that make up said person. Each alter has their own likes, dislikes (though sharing the same brain often they can be very similar so don't panic too much if there are similarities. You share the same brain after all). Alters can change, you would be an alter too as well.
Having said that, when you mention the still switching but it's still you, it could be that another alter and you may be a closer to sharing the same "identity" and be closer to feeling like the same person but you each share more autonomy from one another compared to someone who just has parts of them but it still all feels like them and they're in control (relatively speaking). All alters have different parts, not alter parts but more like the lesser dissociated version of all of this. The more common and regular human parts, such as "work self", "home self", etc. The difference once again simply lies in the level of dissociation there is between these parts, but everyone has parts of themselves as well. For systems, it's just a bit more complicated because sometimes it can just be "Sad Part of A" or an alter that holds A's sadness, or a fragment unrelated to A that usually has no strong of identity and usually only there to do one task (though usually everyone can develop and usually I'd say simply with more fronting, they develop their own sense of self subconsciously).
Things like other personality disorders and other things that affect sense of self tends to be co-morbid with DID and OSDD-1, so it can be a bit confusing, but I do hope this cleared some things up.
This was more helpful thanks for the suggestion! ❤️☺️
I'm so glad it helped!