reality of trauma therapy // POST THERAPY THOUGHTS

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  • čas pƙidĂĄn 3. 10. 2021
  • hey guys, let me know if you think you'd like to see more of these.. I know its not the happiest - but I think its important to show the reality. Not just the reality but I really find it helpful to share with you what's going on in my head, it helps me process it all. Disclaimer, Im not going to go into my trauma personally.. I know you would all understand it so im not worried or anything, its just I won't be talking about all the details but more or less the thoughts and solution to problems I have had for many years. Its recovery. itS HARD! but I know that it will get me somewhere! 💕xxx
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    I love youuuuuu all xx

Komentáƙe • 158

  • @nathalielestrange500
    @nathalielestrange500 Pƙed 2 lety +28

    The sound at the beginning 😌 old times

  • @Sarah-ig4rf
    @Sarah-ig4rf Pƙed 2 lety +55

    I really appreciate your openness Marie, it helps us to feel more in touch with you and less alone with our own struggles. I just want to add, your eyes are beautiful!

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety +1

      you are too kind, thankyou so much! xxxx

  • @curtisbemis6640
    @curtisbemis6640 Pƙed 6 měsĂ­ci +2

    I hate life anymore , idk how im going to get through this stuid holiday without marie . Its taken me so long to even be able to hear her voice without crying , Marie was such an amazing friend and always so sweet and made time to talk with me . She knew how hard it was for me to be anywhere near my family . I only managed because i knew f things got to be too much . I could run and hide and call marie . Now i can only pray and tell her i love and miss her. Im so lost. I just cant function. Im tired of losing everyone i can trust to love me . I can't trust my family, but marie i could . She wouldnt have wasted her time if she didnt genuinly care about me .

    • @Fella.
      @Fella. Pƙed 11 dny

      How are you doing today, 5 months later?

  • @monaebreak561
    @monaebreak561 Pƙed 2 lety +24

    This will sound horrible but it felt nice seeing another person cry. I only ever see my own swollen eyes in the mirror. With that said, I wish you the absoulte best!! ❀

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety +7

      i understand. nothing wrong with crying. it’s healthy (i think). sending love 💗

  • @rolfsinkgraven
    @rolfsinkgraven Pƙed 2 lety +4

    A good therapist opens doors you actually dont like to be open but it has too happen too progress further and too heal, it took me a few years too get it pfft but it will get better in time, you hide a lot off things you have been putting away, life will get better, you have done a lot already.

  • @LK-tp2le
    @LK-tp2le Pƙed 2 lety +9

    I relate to feeling left behind because mental illness has set me back so many years compared to my friends. I have made peace with it by accepting that I am on my own individual and unique path and I will achieve things when the time is right for me. Life is a process of growth, learning and new experiences. Depending on where we are at, each of us need different things at different stages in order to grow. Society creates this false idea that we should all be on the same path, achieving the same things at the same time and that is just not how life works. We are never failing the whole time we are still trying🌈

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety

      this is so super true! 'whole time we are still trying'' I love that. its true. all I ever do is try to be a better person, like im not destructive anymore. I want to have a great life, maybe we just take a detour, I really really want to feel at peace with this ideology. thankyou xx

  • @shannonm3606
    @shannonm3606 Pƙed 2 lety +22

    I felt this! Anger is a scary feeling when you'd use to take the anger out on oneself. Personally i feel like i have to learn to feel and cope with it. I didn't let my younger self do so, i just resorted to destructive behaviour so it almost like others learned from there younger years, but i didn't

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety +1

      its so difficult!

    • @shannonm3606
      @shannonm3606 Pƙed 2 lety

      @@marieroseeee i feel that too! But give yourself a little praise for recognizing the anger and that it something to work on, its progress :) hope you have an amazing day! ❀

  • @TheMarkedGirl717
    @TheMarkedGirl717 Pƙed 2 lety +25

    I know that fear of never being like everyone else too well. That feeling of lagging behind is maybe the hardest thing. Thank you so much for this, Marie.

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety +6

      its awful, you feel like a failure like something that is just disposable. I hate feeling left behind. but having other people also say they feel this way really does make me feel less alone xxx

    • @TheMarkedGirl717
      @TheMarkedGirl717 Pƙed 2 lety +2

      @@marieroseeee It really is so difficult to go through - especially if almost everyone else around you seems to be doing so much better. You're definitely not alone about that. I believe you will achieve even greater things, Marie. You already have. I'm amazed at how well you've been doing but it's hard work! You're such an inspiration and comfort to me and many others so I hope that's a bit of a solace in all the uncertainty.

  • @pengtingshwingaling3563
    @pengtingshwingaling3563 Pƙed 2 lety +12

    i’ve just started weekly trauma therapy too and this is the most i’ve ever related to anything ever like word for word i am so scared of never being like everyone else or “normal” so thank you for making this because recovery can be so so lonely and it’s easy to forget theres other people going through what you are

  • @noellebombardier7556
    @noellebombardier7556 Pƙed 2 lety +5

    This is what spreading awareness is!!! Anger is straight up THE most difficult emotion and for me as well the most embarrassing thing ever. I swear I black out when I’m at a peak with my anger. I wouldn’t wish this feeling on anyone but in a sense I’m glad that I’m not the only one


  • @martyna1961
    @martyna1961 Pƙed 2 lety +20

    There's a lot I wanna say and there's tears in my eyes so here goes..
    Firstly, please make a video about scars and different culture because I live in the UK but I'm from Poland which is a very traditional country so I'd find it very useful on how to cope.
    Secondly, you crying at the end made me cry. I just wanted to give you a big hug, you don't deserve that. But idk if it was what you said or just seeing someone else cry like the way I would or what but somehow you expressed how I feel. But the part I desperately try to hide. In this whole video you brought up so much that I don't show and it felt so weird connecting to someone in this way.. The truth is that I'm so angry at my past self and I hate saying that. There's so much that I said and did that is just so evil. I wouldn't really say this but if it helps anyone then it's worth it. But because of my poor mental health I ended up in a hostel at the end of 2019 and I had plans to go to uni and do so much then it just felt like everything was taken away only I was the one who took it all. It's like I destroyed my life and I keep destroying it. I'll have months where I'm okay and then when I remember things I try so hard to forget everything goes bad. You're not the only one in this position, Marie. I promise I feel like this, too.
    You have no idea how much this opend my eyes. Thank you. Everything will be okay in the end. You're doing so well and you should be so proud of yourself. I'm sending all the love and support❀

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety +3

      martyna, WOW. thankyou so much for this comment, the thoughtfulness and honesty helps me so much. I find it so difficult that I wa a a a s that person. I just feel like I don't how to solve it. but as you say, everything will be okay in the end. just want to say, you seem like a beautiful soul. please never change. this comment really helped me 💕

  • @Loz17
    @Loz17 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    I relate so much to feeling like I'm behind in life and that I'll never get to be like everyone else. I didn't think I'd be around right now either! I'm 23 but I didn't think I'd ever make it to this age and it's such a strage feeling. I'm glad I'm not alone with that one. I love you Marie, you help so many people without even realising

  • @queenjulianalovesherfatban2064

    "Emotions aren't bad, they're just difficult"
    So true 💜 and I feel like I'm really trying to accept my emotions more, but honestly I still very much feel trapped in this cycle of feeling like every time I cry/get really emotional then that means I'm weak/not strong enough/less worthy

  • @alishastokes3990
    @alishastokes3990 Pƙed 2 lety +6

    I get triggered and embarrassed when i feel like my nature or my character is being attacked - if someone implies i am selfish for example
    I used to split when this happened but I'm getting better at recognising what's happening
    And what you're saying at minute 13 - you can only improve over time through practicing it in the real situation, keep going ❀

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety +1

      omg alisha, SAME! it’s like idc if you insult my opinions on things, how i look, what i wear.. but man if you come for my character (that we have pushed so hard to recreate) it sends me OFFFF! it hurts me so badly too, like it’s a stabbing feeeling in my belly. you’re so right. i hate it too. i don’t even know if it’s something to work on? like is this the other persons fault and not mine? idk. it’s something to think about though 💕

  • @elinalannah0022
    @elinalannah0022 Pƙed 2 lety +17

    I’ve never related to anything more than the last clips in this video. Everything you said I felt so deeply, and I think about everyday. It made me feel so reassured but also so sad for us because it’s so so hard. 💞💞

  • @hopebashford2645
    @hopebashford2645 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    I've just got round to watching this because I've been hella busy but omg Marie, I am so proud of you and I totally understand you throughout this whole video đŸ„ș I absolutely love the fact your being so open about this, that takes braveryyy and strength and just shows what an incredible person you are. I started trauma therapy a little while ago and to be honest I find it so hard but this gives me so much strength and motivation because I get where your coming and totally relate to what you were saying and it helps me so much. Just remember Marie, its okay to cry and its okay to feel these emotions. We're all human. Keep going girl 💗 your amazing:)

  • @hayleymarie8004
    @hayleymarie8004 Pƙed 2 lety

    Oh Marie.. ❀ I just want to give you a big hug. You're so amazing.
    I was supposed to have trauma therapy but I decided against it. So you're super strong. I'm proud of you 💖 ly beaut xxxxx

  • @skeletar85
    @skeletar85 Pƙed 2 lety +8

    I understand you so much with the not having a crutch anymore, its so hard to deal with the mood swings you were avoiding!!! This video was so helpful for me to not feel alone in that :)

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety +1

      sending such big hugs your way 💕

  • @curtisbemis6640
    @curtisbemis6640 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    Marie I feel you on so many levels with this feeling useless and unaccomplished a let down and failure in everything I do and everyone I know and have nothing or noone to help you cope with things or understand me and , not being good enough or not even being equal to anyone . . This broke me Marie I don't cry about anything usually but this hit me in a way that hurt deep . Please know your not alone and I'd love to have someone like you to talk to who may understand me. But you don't know me let alone do I deserve your time . I'm blessed to have these videos to watch and get help from them . Your amazing Marie ❀❀❀. As I have told you I'm here anytime and I mean that with everything in me . I can't stand to see anyone else hurt and will do whatever I can to help you if I even could .

  • @chloeeaston8206
    @chloeeaston8206 Pƙed 2 lety

    I loved this video! This was very emotion to watch and had me feeling a lot! I’m so thankful for your honesty on your channel and you’ve helped me so so much over the past few years that I’ve been subscribed, love you Marie you’re the strongest person ever❀❀

  • @Echo-yk1id
    @Echo-yk1id Pƙed 2 lety

    I'm sorry to see you so down Marie, I'm about 5 years older than you & when I was at your age I had started a career I loved, but I was still in fortnightly therapy & it felt like I was on shaky ground constantly and that at any moment everything would fall apart. I wish constantly I had taken time to heal instead of trying to "keep up". Only a few days ago I thought about what would have happened if I never relapsed, like by now I would be saving for a home deposit and have ticked off a few other goals. It really hurts when other's don't show compassion because they have no idea about all you've been through. My psychiatrist once told me that we learn being treated poorly is a sign who we are is worthless, because someone or many someone's failed to respect us as a person. It teaches you shame that was never yours to carry. The antidote to shame is compassion. It doesn't come naturally to people like us, but it's important.
    I dropped out of trauma therapy because I noticed it was just making me into someone I disliked more than the person I was before, extremely angry, bitter, resentful, and antisocial, so I did enjoy your thoughts & I keep track of a few other's in the same stage of therapy to see if there's something to learn. I feel you might like heartoftee on insta. I followed her for years on Tumblr, watched her struggling with ED & PTSD & honestly thought she would die & now she's really making a go of it. Might help you see some light at the end of the tunnel x

  • @mirenamilotic2089
    @mirenamilotic2089 Pƙed 2 lety

    Hey dear Marie.I am following your chanell for a long time.Your videos helped me alot,like this one too.I want you to know-it is okay to feel emotion,every one of them is valid,embarassment is one of the most hardest one,and please dont be hard on yourself for it.There is a reson for every emotion we feel even when we dont know it.What is important is to sit with it and feel it,as you already said.Yes it is extreamly hard,but girl,you are one strong individual.Youve gone through so much in life.Please,give yourself time to heal all of the pain,you really deserve it just like anyone else.We are all just humans and we make mistakes.It is okay as long as we work on it and admit it to youself and do better every time.Please know that you are one huge inspiration and my insoiration to recover and heals as well.Love you so much.Sending hugs.You are awesome,girl,never forget that.I am so glad you are still here.You are needed on thos world.â€â€đŸ€—

  • @ValeryPereiraa
    @ValeryPereiraa Pƙed 2 lety +5

    I feel as if you literally just explained everything that I couldn't say out loud- we really appreciate you & how you allow us to see your struggles as well as your thought processes to help others

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety

      thankyou soOoo much valery, sending hugs 💕

  • @sarawatkins1086
    @sarawatkins1086 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    Everything you are saying I have felt in the past. I can really relate. Therapy is fucking hard, especially when going over things you have locked away. Just know that it’s normal for you to feel this way and it’s okay.
    Try not to look at what you haven’t done and look at what you have done Marie! You might not feel it but you are a strong strong woman. What you have achieved is amazing, please don’t forget that. ❀

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety

      sara đŸ„șđŸ„șđŸ„șđŸ„ș thankyou so much for this beautiful comment 💖

  • @Babaelow
    @Babaelow Pƙed 2 lety +2

    OMG, anger is my problem too! I can be frustrated and then be soooo rude to someone, just to "catalyse", EVEN IF I KNOW EXACTLY IT'S MY FAULT. The frustration isn't the abnormal thing, it's my reaction that is!

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety +1

      EXACTLY! like why?????? why am I so defensive??

  • @thebruhgirlexperience
    @thebruhgirlexperience Pƙed 2 lety +1

    I love how open you are marie, you help more people than you know ! ❀

  • @kelskrivanek472
    @kelskrivanek472 Pƙed 2 lety +2

    Thank you for sharing such an insightful and personal video. Very proud of you Marie!

  • @kylagoodale9066
    @kylagoodale9066 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    I really did think this video was great and helped me a lot because it brings me a sense of comfort knowing someone understands what I'm going through. I think we have a lot in common when it comes to anger problems and not being the same person you are when you lose control. I understand , I'm glad you made this video I think it was a healthy thing for you to release your emotions. Love you Marie, here for you.❀

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety +1

      this means so much to me. thankyou so so much bubs. 💕

  • @tilda8940
    @tilda8940 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    Thank you for making me not feel alone, I relate so much to this. I started trauma therapy aboout 1,5 months ago and it's the hardest and worst thing I've ever done♄

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety

      it can be difficult, I think everything we find hard its important to surface them, im trying, you're trying. that's all that matters xxxx

  • @rechidlina7545
    @rechidlina7545 Pƙed 2 lety

    Marie know that u r so strong thank u for sharing all this with us it really helps 💚

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety +1

      i’m glad it helped abit đŸ„ș

  • @hillakotlovsky1463
    @hillakotlovsky1463 Pƙed 2 lety +6

    I can tell you that dealing with trauma and mental issues is not only about excepting the past it's also about mourning the person you could have been and knowing and accepting that you might not be that person anymore because that ship has shipped but you have the power to find out who you can be and honestly it's easier said than done let me tell you this but its a process so give yourself the time and resources to do it....

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety

      this is so so true, grief is so circumstantial and not really an emotion that can just disapear..

  • @hallewilliams3987
    @hallewilliams3987 Pƙed 2 lety

    You are very strong. I couldn't understand what you're going through but you are strong to be able to go through this process. I'm proud of you.

  • @elizabethconroy7665
    @elizabethconroy7665 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    Marie
    Thank you for being so honest and sharing all this personal information
    I tried Therapy
    Hated it
    Made me feel worse
    Have more or less managed to heal myself albeit imperfectly but will never go through this again
    Good Luck on your journey

  • @ABenson-rq3tj
    @ABenson-rq3tj Pƙed rokem

    Thank u for being so open x

  • @abby.v.t
    @abby.v.t Pƙed 2 lety

    everyone is on there own path if everyone did everything at the same time the world wouldn`t cope. you have done so much and you should be proud of yourself, we are all proud of you. your still young you still have so much to give the world. my dad didnt go to university until he was in his 50`s. if you want something doesnt matter how old you are as long as you want to do it. no one has lived your life no one knows what you have been through. if you want to be something at 30 for eg but scared because everyone else has seems to be living there best life in there dream job dont be ashamed you will still be 30 and why not do something you love.
    hope that helps in a way and makes sense

  • @jazz2179
    @jazz2179 Pƙed 2 lety

    Love this video!! Can relate so much to everything you're saying saying especially the anger part, that's definitely me! Well done for putting the work in. I'm quite scared of therapy tbh

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety +1

      i was terrified. but i was more scared of the person i could become if i didn’t do it. 💕

  • @bethck4549
    @bethck4549 Pƙed 2 lety +4

    It’s not fair that the victims of trauma are the ones who have to do all the WORK it takes to become survivors and thrivers. I just want to remind you that the embarrassment you feel isn’t yours. It’s the abusers. It’s so easy to get the lines blurred when you’ve kept the shame secret for so long. That’s what’s so hard about going BACK and resolving wrongs from our past. We feel the pain just like we did as the child/young adult and then loathe ourselves because it’s not complicated, we understand the issue, but we still can’t make it stop. I don’t know if you’ve read about emotional flashbacks and Pete Walker’s work on complex post traumatic stress, but you should if you haven’t. I spent all my teen years in hospitals, was diagnosed and medicated as a “borderline with schizoaffective disorder” but nothing helped until I did the trauma therapy and learned more about complex trauma. I went from spending seven years in hospitals, and dropping out of high school and missing out everything and feeling like the abuse I experienced as a child ended up with feeling abused by the mental health system and sure as hell abusing myself. I don’t know if you understand but ifykyk
 there’s just so much embarrassment and regret and grief about the whole thing. I loved this video Marie, it made all of my post therapy rambles without a camera feel less unhinged because you were able to document it and share it with us. Thank you for seeing my experience through sharing yours. I’ve been a follower of yours for years now ( on here and ig, I’m @beth.ck) and it’s been an honor to watch your journey. I know that everything you’re going through now is preparing you for a dream bigger than you can imagine. Sending you so much love, and my dm’s are always open if you ever need a brain to bounce off of around trauma therapy or “unfucking” yourself after the chaos that seems to be life up to this point ❀❀

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety

      Thank you so much Beth, I messaged you on Instagram just because this comment means so much to me. Not only did you take the time to write such a emotional message, it sharing your own struggles and the solutions to them or at least theories to them is so important to me - jus t want to thank you. I’m sending loads of love 💕

  • @shannonm3606
    @shannonm3606 Pƙed 2 lety +6

    Also thank you for showing what its like after a therapy session, and that its okay to feel more all over the place more than you first went into a session. This used to anger and confuse me! STAY STRONG BEAUTIFUL 🧡

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety +1

      thankyou so much Shannon! its difficult, but important to see xxxx

    • @shannonm3606
      @shannonm3606 Pƙed 2 lety

      @@marieroseeee thank you for being so open and amazing! ❀ (also for responding you've made my day! 🧡)

  • @MyCCM13
    @MyCCM13 Pƙed 2 lety

    Marie, you don't have to be like everybody else, you are you, you can become the person you want to be and that cab look different everyday. You are good the way you are and you are on your way, hurting is part of the process. As longs as you keep going, keep trying, you will get trough this. This right now, is not forever. Look what you've been through, you are here, despite it all. You chose to fight and that's more than enough sometimes. You are working on feeling better, on finding yourself, creating yourself. You are valid, you are loved and important and you are not alone in this. It might feel like it but not all feelings are true (doesn't mean they aren't valid because they are!) You have enough time! You have enough time to move out one day, give yourself that time. Step by step. This is only the beginning and beginnings are hard. One day you look back and see that things change. You learn to cope with things differently. Keep these things, goals, close, they aren't impossible. Don't give up on yourself when you need yourself the most. Finding and creating yourself, your life, doesn't happen overnight, it's a process and that takes time, it deserves to take time. You will get there because look how far you've gotten already. It is unfair, that we have to fight for our own life but it will be worth it in the end. It doesn't always make us stronger and that's ok but one thing is sure, you have what it takes to get trough this! ❀

  • @sakuram4908
    @sakuram4908 Pƙed 2 lety +2

    thank you so so so much for this

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety +1

      im so so happy to hear that đŸ„ș

  • @chloeeaston8206
    @chloeeaston8206 Pƙed 2 lety +3

    Also showing how tough things can be after therapy and how many emotions and doors can be opened is amazing! Well done x

  • @quinnnfagst7797
    @quinnnfagst7797 Pƙed 2 lety

    Love hearing updates like this♄

  • @jessqinn7702
    @jessqinn7702 Pƙed 2 lety

    Oh gosh. Thank you for sharing. Thank you for being so real. And for showing how people change over time.
    I think I understand what you mean about the feeling embarrassed and how someone saying “you don’t need to be” does nothing.
    Sometimes, for me, the embarrassed feeling can be linked to shame
.depending what it’s about.
    I love the timer thing for feelings.
    Sending you much encouragement for continuing the therapy.
    And oh man, no crutches. Far out it’s flipping hard hey. I still some of mine. Because it is terrifying to feel the shit.
    Keep at it. You got this.

    • @jessqinn7702
      @jessqinn7702 Pƙed 2 lety

      Oh, and thinking about the anger thing

it’s a fricken tough one.
      One thing I’ve come across in my “therapy journey” (ugh) is that underneath anger can be hurt or scared. And you kind mentioned scared when talking about the anger? And defence mechanisms going up?
      So is there a way to like have a “stop and pause” and ask what’s underneath the anger right now?
      Like if it’s with someone - and you see red and are angry towards them or whatever, is it something they said or did that had hit something inside around hurt or scared or something?
      (I could be way off and it’s different for you so ignore me if that’s the case)
      And thank you for being honest. I know I don’t know you, but I felt so much during what you shared today and wished I could have given you a hug. And I’ll let you know - you’ll get there. You will. Keep breathing. Keep going. You don’t see it all now, but you’ll get there.
      Therapy, definitely not glamorous. But so worth it.

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety +1

      Wow, thank you so much for this comment. It really means a lot to me that you took the time to try and understand things that I don’t even understand myself. I’m really going to try with therapy. I really want to be able to leave that place being the person I want to be and the person I want to be may not be someone who can handle anger well but maybe just someone who can handle handle anger better. It’s very strange. but thankyou so much 😭

  • @mentalhealthwithalana
    @mentalhealthwithalana Pƙed 2 lety +1

    Marie, I can really relate to you with feeling like you are left behind. I'm sorry therapy is so hard. I hope you can have more compassion for yourself hun because you are doing amazing ♄♄♄

  • @holly712
    @holly712 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    Your not alone I feel you Marie. It’s ok to regret it’s ok to hate. It’s really ok

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety +1

      💖 thankyou, this means so much

  • @justmai2476
    @justmai2476 Pƙed 2 lety

    I feel you.
    Struggled with severe PTSD, then I recovered. Every time I came out of a session I felt worse than going in. I wanted to stop so badly. Then, 2 years in, I finally recovered. Still am recovered.
    I'm mentally and physically disabled, have severe learning disabilities and am fighting like hell -doesn't mean I'm a success story, but I am trying. You're not alone in that.
    I am alone in that I don't know anyone with severe mental disorders or who is severely disabled in any other way, and I have rare conditions, so I only meet people online. It's very hard, I am very much different (I have Asperger's, lol) and have such a different reality to EVERYONE I know. I know I'm not alone in that, just feel that way. Some days are good, then some days I cry. Some days, I know I'm the only one who can help myself.
    Try to be kind to yourself ♡

  • @moniqueker3272
    @moniqueker3272 Pƙed 2 lety

    Love you Marie, thank you for this video đŸ€

  • @Summer-hp1nw
    @Summer-hp1nw Pƙed 2 lety +2

    Hey Marie! I would love to hear how you dealt with people asking about your scars. I've had people ask me before and I never know how to deal with it. I love your videos and keep up the amazing work! 🧡🧡🧡

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety

      i really want to do a video about it because i think i’m so much stronger in replying to them 💕

  • @lucybuchanan9734
    @lucybuchanan9734 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    the intro music i think i just cried a little ahhh, i love you and really missed this :) xx

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety

      đŸ„șđŸ„șđŸ„șđŸ„ș reallly? i’ve missed it too

  • @sarahjo5570
    @sarahjo5570 Pƙed 2 lety

    bby about the last bit. Everyone always feels left behind. Like yeah I graduated college and have a shitty apartment but I've literally never been in a relationship because of my anxiety and trauma. And I only JUST started working at a real job and I just turned 24 and I feel how most kids do at like 18. I'm permalonely, two of my best friends just got engaged and I'm just like putting on 100 pain patches on my back so I don't cry from backaches while I'm at work because I'm too anxious to advocate for myself.
    Sometimes you just gotta cry it out and feel sorry for yourself before you can pull your big girl pants up and get back to taking on the world. Doesn't mean you're any lesser than anyone else, if just makes you real.

  • @josiemarie3828
    @josiemarie3828 Pƙed 2 lety

    No words for this one. Lots of love to you girl 💗💗 and in terms of content, I think this part of your journey is one that gets overlooked and so while ever you’re comfortable to share, it can only do good!!! We’ve seen you go through the psych wards, crisis, “early days” recovery (and those vids help me every day some weeks don’t get me wrong) and we’re always told there’s more than that but we never actually see it or know how. I know you’ve been a bit lost with your content, but just you talking with hindsight now about the things that used to be your main content is so special! PROUD đŸ€

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety +1

      wow, i feel emotional reading this đŸ„ș thankyou so much for taking the time to comment this! it means so much 💘

    • @josiemarie3828
      @josiemarie3828 Pƙed 2 lety

      @@marieroseeee I really think you’ve got so much more to say in terms of MH content than you thinkđŸ„ș Of course this only applies if you want to talk about it and keep MH content in your channel. But all I’m saying is don’t ever think you’re now unable to help people or raise awareness just because you’re happier and in a new chapter - this is when you can help the most💗💗💗

  • @rechidlina7545
    @rechidlina7545 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    Omgg the old introoo is my fav 😭😭😭💚💚💚💚

  • @PinkSilkSuit
    @PinkSilkSuit Pƙed 2 lety +1

    “I know I’m older when I stop wanting to strangle the girl I was and try to hold her instead.” - Rhiannon McGavin, from “Habit,” in Grocery List Poems

  • @natr5774
    @natr5774 Pƙed 2 lety

    THE INTROđŸ„șđŸ„ș feels like a safe space x

  • @sabrinavanbommel5337
    @sabrinavanbommel5337 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    Your eyes are really pretty and I love your videos!

  • @beexkat
    @beexkat Pƙed 2 lety

    I love this video it helps so much thank you!

  • @sarahjo5570
    @sarahjo5570 Pƙed 2 lety

    BROOOOO the embarrassment !!!! I told my therapist about it because embarrassment traumatizes me, like I'll get flashbacks, it'll make me sick, I'll cry. and she's like the only thing to do is be kind to yourself. Like that's all well and good but it literally feels like I'm on fire but the fire is judgy eyes and insults and it absolutely is the worst and there's no way to erase it or forget that feeling it NEVER goes away. So, in the meantime, you and I, we're gonna be kind to ourselves... and if my therapist figures out a way to make me stop vomiting over saying the wrong answer in 7th grade ONE TIME I'll let you know.

  • @helena-sx6su
    @helena-sx6su Pƙed 2 lety

    I really enjoyed this type of video. Omg the anger.. that is my main emotion bit no-one ever really sees it. My therapist said let it out in the safe space with her but it is never there in the room.. so annoying because I really want to

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety +1

      It’s really strange that you say that because I last week had therapy and I allowed myself to get angrier than I normally would. It was really scary and just felt so unfamiliar because it was a safe space and normally I release anger in non-safe spaces. I don’t know if that makes sense but I think releasing a little bit at a time might be the way to go, sending love XX

  • @ethanmichael17
    @ethanmichael17 Pƙed 2 lety +4

    Yup. Not expecting to be around at this point and now its like "oh fuck now what?"

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety +1

      it’s actually a really hard thing to deal with. â˜č

  • @kristinab6135
    @kristinab6135 Pƙed 2 lety

    💜 your doing incredible.

  • @rachaelharper3778
    @rachaelharper3778 Pƙed 2 lety

    Love you too Marie❀ what I do when I have negative moments I write it down then crumble the paper and putting it into the bin

  • @Healingpath1988
    @Healingpath1988 Pƙed 2 lety

    It’s hard work I’m going through it too / sending you hugs đŸ€—

  • @otrinolaringolog
    @otrinolaringolog Pƙed 2 lety

    Please, hold on. You're strong even if you don't feel it.

  • @queenjulianalovesherfatban2064

    I have a really toxic cycle where for about one whole week/two weeks every time I feel sad, anxious or angry, I will just shove it to one side and try and distance myself from those emotions because it often feels easier to do that, so all my emotions just end up stacked on top of each other and then after that week/two weeks I just explode and I will burst into tears and I am just generally a massive emotional wreck. Also I take out all my suppressed feelings on the people around me which I absolutely hate, but idk what to do because I feel like if I let myself cry and feel my emotions as soon as they happen then that makes me weak but at the same time if I bottle my emotions up I just end up exploding and that also makes me feel weak so yeah. Also I just wanted to say that I could relate so much to when you said that you don't often get angry but when you do you see red, I'm exactly the same, what I do is if I'm annoyed with someone even if it's for a completely valid/reasonable reason like if someone makes an insensitive comment about my mental health/scars, instead of immediately confronting the person/letting them know that they've annoyed me, I will hide my anger because I feel like to me anyway, I see anger as an immature or childish emotion, so instead I just bottle up all my anger so when it does finally come out I become so toxic and I hate it. I admire you for being so raw and honest in this video

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety

      i completely understand. it’s so difficult and the anger is scary. i wish you so much love. big hugs sis xx

  • @sarahjo5570
    @sarahjo5570 Pƙed 2 lety

    these are good videos to make even if you don't post them, because they help process the therapy. and like idk for me I wish therapy was like 17 hours long sometimes because I only ever scratch the tippytop of the surface in an hour. My best friend (my Pip) and I do post therapy thoughts to each other and it's honestly almost better than the therapy sometimes.

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety

      your comment means so much to me! you get me! thankyou. it means so much and i’m so glad i’m not the only one đŸ„ș sending love, yeah if i could stop being so embarrassed about the wrong answer that i gave too 😅. xxx

  • @daisyasbury9593
    @daisyasbury9593 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    I'm waiting for emdr for my trauma and I've never related more to a video before. Thank you for making a video like this, makes me feel not alone

  • @Mental_health_an_Molly
    @Mental_health_an_Molly Pƙed 2 lety

    Honestly sometimes when you talk you could be talking about me 😭🙈 I'm finally doing trauma therapy will be my fourth session this week and I don't know how my therapist does it but I start talking and just don't stop about things I didn't even know I was still carrying around. I'm doing a lot of child talk witch I am struggling with and I mean talking about things that have happened to me and just full-on dissociation right there. It's hard so hard but I have hope it's going to help and we can get through it together - no one talks about the struggle of getting through your mental health and surviving but them realising the things you missed out on or things that happen that you can't undo or things you done and can't take back but we can't look back and I tell you all the time but your worth so much more then you realise and have helped so many people and I hope you see that soon 💕 I hate my younger self but I think it because thinking of her and things she went though hurts too much and not being able to help her kills me but we look to the future and I know you got this Marie and 16 year old Maria would be proud!

  • @rechidlina7545
    @rechidlina7545 Pƙed 2 lety +1

    I love u marie 😔💚💚💚

  • @xianthe_
    @xianthe_ Pƙed 2 lety +1

    It's ok not to be ok. Let your emotions out. Crying has benefits. You're working thru difficult things, give yourself some grace. Making it thru the day is an accomplishment. You're getting stronger, even though it feels like the opposite.

  • @jasminelee1234
    @jasminelee1234 Pƙed 2 lety

    Your are such a brave, honest person. Keep going.😘Side note you have such pretty eyes! đŸ‘ŒđŸŒ

  • @vickyrookiey9860
    @vickyrookiey9860 Pƙed 2 lety +3

    Love the idea of this video! Tho it's going to kill me not knowing what you meant by boring when you was at wedding 😂😂😂😂

    • @vickyrookiey9860
      @vickyrookiey9860 Pƙed 2 lety +1

      How can you be boring on sari? Am I dumb 😂😂😂😂😂

  • @lucyburke8724
    @lucyburke8724 Pƙed 2 lety

    There’s no time limit on moving out/ getting a job etc! I’m 35 and lived in many different places and also back with parents in between! Don’t think there’s a ‘must’ for these things! Everyone progresses at different times/stages! My partner has just given up work after 20 years of solid hospitality work due to having to deal with severe Chrons, a colostomy bag recently and now mental health!! It makes you realise that just having a healthy, happy partner is all that matters!! Money and a job can wait for him right now!

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety

      thankyou SO much lucy, like i know these things but to hear them sAid by someone else, makes me feel less guilty! thankyou for your comment and sending love and hugs to you and your partner 💕🌾

  • @lornatw
    @lornatw Pƙed 2 lety

    Sending much love 💗 also it would be interesting to hear how your feelings and response to your body around a new environment differed or didn't to your usual surroundings and what/who helped etc. Do you think you act differently or put on a face when under pressure or perceive judgement? 💗

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety +1

      very interesting! for the first time in my life, im refusing to 'put on a face'. if people don't like me for me, then sound - its okay to not be liked. Dylans family respect me as I do to them. they accept me as I am and never ever make me feel different. the culture definitely set it aside though, but I never get ashamed of my scars anymore.. but I have been in this mentality for nearly 4 years now. it means that if Im confronted - regardless of the reason or the person, I feel very confident in being asked. I understand how difficult this is though, I remember being absolutely traumatised by my own scars, it hurts! but its a process. im sending so much love xxxx

    • @lornatw
      @lornatw Pƙed 2 lety

      @@marieroseeee 💗 thank you for your response, it's uplifting seeing and hearing your journey and reflections xxx

  • @rosiestores6158
    @rosiestores6158 Pƙed 2 lety

    Love you so so much

  • @Jesuswalks7475
    @Jesuswalks7475 Pƙed 2 lety

    I wish you peace and happiness. God loves you. đŸ€™

  • @PUCCKKK
    @PUCCKKK Pƙed 2 lety +6

    I'm excited for your journey

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety

      as far as im aware its just SA trauma therapy x

  • @domy6827
    @domy6827 Pƙed 2 lety

    I've just started trauma therapy too. just working on building stability for now

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety

      it’s difficult but hopefully worth it!

  • @LK-tp2le
    @LK-tp2le Pƙed 2 lety

    The two things I try to remind myself of are:
    1) Making poor decisions is understandable and forgivable before you have learnt to effectively manage mental anguish and emotional pain. We are not born knowing how to do these things, we have to learn and are bound to make mistakes along the way.
    2) Never regret your past. Accept it as the teacher that it is.
    Life is all about learning and growing. None of us are perfect. I believe that so long as we acknowledge our flaws and mistakes and work to try to improve and not repeat them in the future then we have nothing to reproach ourselves on 💕

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety

      I love this, like so much - THIS is what my I need my mentality to remember. thankyou!

  • @neurodivergentdawn
    @neurodivergentdawn Pƙed 2 lety +4

    Love you Marie ❀ Marie please look into ADHD. It can be a reason why women struggle to regulate their emotions. You can ask your GP to be assessed. There is a trait in both people with autism and ADHD called alexythmia which means to struggle to identify emotions - I have that too. I was diagnosed with autism at 22 earlier this year and it explains all the mental health problems I have ever had. I am also behind where I want to be in life but understanding I am neurodiverse has helped - I can be kinder to myself, find things that helps me, and meet others that understand. I hope this comment helps.

    • @TheStarsAlly
      @TheStarsAlly Pƙed 2 lety +1

      From my experience, people can fit a lot of different diagnoses especially those with BPD. Im one of them. I dont think its helpful to suggest diagnoses to someone you dont really know much about. In BPD DBT therapy we learn a lot about recognizing emotions because we struggle to do that. Additionally Marie has recognized emotions many many times before. She has said these things on camera. Truly just my opinion.

    • @TheStarsAlly
      @TheStarsAlly Pƙed 2 lety +1

      Also she said that she experienced that when she was younger. Which is a normal part of childhood and adolescence for a lot of people. She also recognized anger in this video.

  • @domy6827
    @domy6827 Pƙed 2 lety

    i will never be like everyone else. i dropped out, i don't have a full time job, I made no plans for the future. :(

  • @liannemcclean1446
    @liannemcclean1446 Pƙed 2 lety

    I don't know if you can help me..
    My 15 year old daughter is in recovery although it's a slow process.. she was in hospital for 4 months but home now since December.
    She is self harm free, accepting help although is completely non verbal since coming home..
    She slowly stopped talking before going into hospital and spoke a few words...but nothing since coming home..is this part of trauma..plsse help

    • @marieroseeee
      @marieroseeee  Pƙed 2 lety

      hi Lianne, I just want to say before we start that I actually have no qualifications in the house or anything like that however the only thing that I can really say is that you’re such an amazing mum to be commenting you know to try make your daughter better. I hope you hear this a lot more than me just saying it. Your current resilience is so incredible I’m so glad that your daughter has you and I’m so sorry for everything you must be going through. Like I said I don’t know much about things and it sounds like your daughter is obviously still struggling a lot I’m sending all my love and hugs not only do your daughter but to you too Lianne 💕

    • @liannemcclean1446
      @liannemcclean1446 Pƙed 2 lety

      Thanks so much I appreciate your kind words..
      My daughter watches your videos and I know she finds them helpful and funny to watch..
      I was wondering if you knew of any support groups for teenagers with mental health and mutism..
      Many thanks Lianne đŸ€—

    • @liannemcclean1446
      @liannemcclean1446 Pƙed 2 lety

      P.s she only just starting using her phone again so this is why I am messaging you and I do show her any replies I get..
      Thanks again x

  • @millie123loftus5
    @millie123loftus5 Pƙed 2 lety

    I don’t like my life at the moment my cousin passed away

  • @alexbrown2288
    @alexbrown2288 Pƙed 10 hodinami

    14:40 "boring"?

  • @rachaelharper3778
    @rachaelharper3778 Pƙed 2 lety

    What the fuck am I doing
 literally me 😭😭 I feel so disconnected with myself I don’t know who I am

  • @Jesuswalks7475
    @Jesuswalks7475 Pƙed 2 lety

    If you want to know your shadow self, ask Satan into your heart, if you want to know your light side ask Jesus into your heart, your coming to a fork in the road and the choice you make I'll change you. Just know God loves you and Jesus wants to save you at some point in your life, please understand your heading for a breakthrough, you must choose light or darkness. God doesn't want you sitting on the fence anymore, please know the choice you will make it will ultimately lead you to your destiny with God in heaven. God loves you, the good, the bad, the ugly, I'll be praying for you. God bless you sweet girl and courageous fighter, your life with God will begin like all believers once you die spiritually, to be ressurected to new life. Embrace your pain, hold onto Jesus it might be scary but that only means you want Jesus. Give up on being anyone else but you, God made you just as you are and you are lovely in his eyes. If you want to be productive with your time, spend 5 mins everyday thanking God and 2 mins reading the Bible, and your not stupid don't call yourself that, say I am happy when ...and I am beautiful just the way I am. 🙂

  • @MudlarkDiggingUpTheThames

    I don't know what you meant by you were boring

  • @readjon
    @readjon Pƙed 2 lety

    The best on You Tube , I’m getting scars like you I hope

    • @holly712
      @holly712 Pƙed 2 lety +2

      Pls delete this comment

    • @readjon
      @readjon Pƙed 2 lety

      @@holly712 why ? Marie is a positive influence

    • @buckleupbuckaroos1204
      @buckleupbuckaroos1204 Pƙed 2 lety +2

      @@readjon she doesn’t endorse or glamourise self harm, nor does she encourage it. she encourages people to be confident in their bodies. why would you *want* that anyway? i think you need to leave the internet and speak to someone about this

    • @readjon
      @readjon Pƙed 2 lety

      @@buckleupbuckaroos1204 I didn’t say she did , she’s an inspiration . Chill

    • @readjon
      @readjon Pƙed 2 lety

      @@buckleupbuckaroos1204 I think you are entitled to your opinion as am I . I am confident with the scars

  • @user-wk8yy1ee4j
    @user-wk8yy1ee4j Pƙed 2 lety

    I really hope that y'will search about Islam religion . That Will change your life . You won't need a therapy again 😉