The Dangerous Relationship Between A Narcissist and An Empath

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  • čas přidán 11. 09. 2024
  • In today's video Jill talks about the dangers of a relationship between a narcissist and an empath.
    Jill Wise, otherwise known as The Enlightened Target, is a life long survivor of narcissistic abuse. She was raised by a malignant narcissist and married to a malignant narcissist, she has endured years of parental alienation, has repeatedly been targeted by narcissists throughout her life. She has an intimate understanding of all aspects of narcissistic abuse and Cptsd. She uses her experience and what she has learned to help educate others and bring awareness to narcissistic abuse. She is also a Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Coach and works with clients all over the world heal from the trauma of narcissistic abuse, parental alienation and Complex Ptsd.
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Komentáře • 231

  • @joglynn602
    @joglynn602 Před 10 měsíci +17

    One thing the narc forgets is when the empath turns into a super empath they will destroy the narc and the narc will suffer big time 🙏🔥

  • @lorrainehewlett984
    @lorrainehewlett984 Před 5 měsíci +7

    I once heard a narcissist admit, “I have an intellectual understanding of compassion but I don’t live in it.”

  • @GeckoHiker
    @GeckoHiker Před rokem +34

    Imagine an empath raised by a narcissist. That's what puts the C in C-PTSD.

    • @chellotrevino7323
      @chellotrevino7323 Před 7 měsíci +5

      Me 2 actually both malignants I’m still here matter of fact thats what made me strong today ❤🕊️

  • @rodneymartel452
    @rodneymartel452 Před rokem +89

    The relationship is predicated upon the codependent nature of the people involved. Ironically both have minimal boundaries for themselves.

    • @SidNasir
      @SidNasir Před rokem +8

      Exactly. Perfect disaster.

    • @Matt-602
      @Matt-602 Před rokem +5

      Not true! They smash boundaries after pretending to abide by some new rules announced to them after they're trying to get slightly disrespectful (in my case at least from them)

    • @charlesagibb6593
      @charlesagibb6593 Před rokem +20

      @@Matt-602 Give an inch, they take a mile, when you object they proclaim themselves a victim, off they go to the flying monkeys with a tale of woe. It's a game where you abide by the rules, and they don't.

    • @GoblinProblem
      @GoblinProblem Před rokem +17

      The relationship happens usually due to the empath's lack of knowledge of NPD.
      Once they learn the data of NPD and learn that this person that is killing them slowly is not what the usual average person and that this condition is hard wired and unmutable by external influences.
      Up until then the Empath is wracked by confusion. Human intuition is usually correct. An empath generally more so.
      So when it is fooled its confusing. A person who cares will try to solve that confusion and is more likely to take the cruel critical things the narc may have said to them......
      But once one has the data, one 's perspective changes. Once one has the data on NPD like in these videos they can usually dismiss any hurtful thing said by the narc because it was only said to hurt.
      They dont try to change the narc because "bones to balls" the narc is a narc all the way through their being. It cannot be changed any more than a bird can change into a fish.
      It isnt codependence in many cases as the one party was only put into a dependence or deficiency due to the narc and deception.
      But once they watch just a few vids from this source, they become independent very fast.

    • @chickenbiscuit4525
      @chickenbiscuit4525 Před rokem +3

      Maximal opportunistic.
      Its the altruistic that by nature maintains the upper hand.

  • @jornfox3545
    @jornfox3545 Před rokem +51

    Empaths have to remember to save their own souls, not just help and inspire others. This can be done through deep 'Kriya' meditation/prayer.

    • @nicoedits6940
      @nicoedits6940 Před 6 měsíci +1

      The Kriya is why Yaweh removed His protection from these demons in your life

    • @TheAussieHobo
      @TheAussieHobo Před 5 měsíci +1

      Dude they are enabling the abuse.
      They are just as bad

  • @juliejen2605
    @juliejen2605 Před rokem +24

    I thank God for prayer and the power of Jesus, to break every chain and power over others.

  • @thomasjorge4734
    @thomasjorge4734 Před rokem +11

    A Giver meets The Taker and Gets Taken! You must NEVER Dialogue with the Devil!

  • @caralee2617
    @caralee2617 Před rokem +101

    The only connection I can think of is that both are based on the perpetrator’s undue emphasis of his/her own thoughts/emotions. In narcissistic abuse, perpetrators usually expresses the attitude that everything centers around them. They may object to that description and even insist that they don’t believe that; but, their actions say otherwise. Virtually everything you do/don’t do gets tied back to the perpetrator as a person. You’re either doing something right b/c you’re smart, capable, etc., or you’re intentionally doing it wrong in order to hurt/anger the perpetrator in some way. You are also likely to be accused of doing it wrong, even if you’re doing it right-again b/c of the perpetrator’s thoughts/emotions. Toxic positivity is generally not perpetrated with the intention to hurt anyone, and most wouldn’t even recognize it as being toxic/hurtful; but, in most cases, the perpetrator is still oblivious to the effect it has on others, and to the value of that effect. Narcissism is a psychological disorder and, with few exceptions, abuse is perpetrated with the tangible intention of causing harm. In contrast, toxic positivity is a behavioral flaw that is essentially an extreme version of selfishness, based in denial, and is generally perpetrated with the intention of maintaining and creating happiness. Most people are selfish, in some way or another. Toxic positivity is a subtle expression of selfishness-so subtle that even the perpetrator may not realize why it’s wrong b/c, after all, s/he is only seeking to encourage/uplift people. This is where denial comes in. Most people struggle/suffer, at some point or another. I believe that most people are also aware that there are people who experience more pain than they are aware of from their own lives. Denial allows people to look at someone who reminds them of themselves and assume that they cannot be justified in their suffering b/c the observer is not suffering. Denial also allows people who have suffered to deny the significance of other people’s suffering b/c it is notably different from their own, or b/c they perceive it as being notably different. From here, there are 2 extremes: One is for them to be semi-consciously abusive-meaning that they are generally aware that their actions are hurtful; but, they rationalize it as being justified. The other is to perpetrate toxic positivity-in which they are completely unaware that their actions are hurtful and it’s difficult for them to identify why they would be. Additionally, That feeling when your partner cheated and you don't have the courage to leave him / her so you just death with the pain and live everyday asking questions about your worth. This pain is different from the cheating one_living and seeing him everywhere anticipating when him or she do it again. The best thing is to hire a private investigator Metaspyhub@gmail. com to help you spy on their cellphone remotely just like he did for me...

  • @lynnkliewer7201
    @lynnkliewer7201 Před rokem +13

    We were brought up in toxic homes ,we wanted peace and the only way we got it was to be a people pleaser..This is so awaking I hope you all see it as-well .You should of been loved for who you are not what you do for others !😊

  • @charlesagibb6593
    @charlesagibb6593 Před rokem +45

    This is a very clear and concise overall description of the emotions which shape the personality of the empath. I was never abused as a child, but emotionally I was neglected. Being the sixth child of seven my parents were very busy and did their best I'm sure of that. I met a girl from a very dysfunctional family who needed saving. I thought I just wanted to give her the love, affection, and a happy family life. She played the damsel in distress, I was her hero. Little did I know the " false self" she projected was tailor made to pull me deeper and deeper into a committed relationship. With each milestone of commitment achieved the need of the false self became less and less ( many red flags later ) until it was one way giving. The empath literally empties their effort, energy and love into a heartless broken human being . I was discarded twice before what should have been the final discard. Knowing nothing of narcissism I didn't understand what had , and was taking place. I allowed the narcissist to retro hoover me fifty or more times over the following twenty years until three years ago when I recognised the character traits of a co dependent in myself ( always trying to fix everything to help my Mum and Dad) I had unwittingly fallen for a Jezebel. When you show the narcissist you have gained an understanding of how they function it's a terrible shock, and causes them an narcissistic wound. You won't see them for dust. All they have left is an endless smear campaign carried out using faithful flying monkeys. Thanks Jill , for bringing enlightenment to so many, it's a painful journey with many miles of rocky roads, but your videos have helped me a great deal. Thanks.

  • @cyncin7247
    @cyncin7247 Před rokem +28

    Right on. Thank you. I am such an empath! The narc is trying to get back into my life after three years of no contact. I simply deleted the emails. 😊

  • @bongjamesbong00420
    @bongjamesbong00420 Před 10 měsíci +5

    Watch out for these self proclaimed "empaths" that talk too much. They claim to be "empaths" but can't tell how much their excessive talking is causing discomfort. If you share something about yourself they'll circle back and mirror you with what happened to them.

  • @gerrylang6636
    @gerrylang6636 Před 9 měsíci +6

    Very very true. Narcissists are indeed like "Strigoi", parasitic psychopathic energy and soul vampires. This was a great summation of these deeply damaged and damaging aberrant personality types, who as you very correctly state we should avoid at all costs!

  • @katherinelim5310
    @katherinelim5310 Před 9 měsíci +7

    You are spot on the characteristics of both the narcissistic and empath. Years and years of abuses by the narcissistic spouses inflicted on the empaths. Best way to save from more abuses is to leave the relationship without any contact. Never too late to leave and start life anew. Many do not understand this destructive toxic condition and there is no way this kind of person can change or heal.

  • @VickiWells-lg5ub
    @VickiWells-lg5ub Před 7 dny +1

    This is truth . I am seventy years old now and this has been my entire life story . I was the scapegoat truth teller in my six sibling circus family who was groomed to marry a Christian covert narcissist. Only to raise four children who thought He was god and now completely alienated from all of them . But for the first time in my entire life I have peace and I know who I am . I only have pity for these empty shells of people because I know Who created me and for what purpose and this story of my life is definitely not over . Step away from them all and find joy, thank you for shining the brightest light on this .❤️

  • @anonimous7099
    @anonimous7099 Před rokem +13

    My borderline ex called me a narcissist when I could stand her lies and anger and control. 💔

  • @Hannah-eq5ff
    @Hannah-eq5ff Před rokem +20

    I'm so exhausted explaining to my sister about my narcissistic parents. I literally feel unwell and I lose control of my body like light headedness. I told her not to introduce things that I introduced to her to my parents. I don't like to expose too much of my life to my controlling & manipulative parents.

    • @sherlock7687
      @sherlock7687 Před rokem +4

      @ Hannah-eq5ff : You sound just like me, i say the exact same things to my sister. Talking to my parents is like mental gymnastics. x

    • @lorettaknox154
      @lorettaknox154 Před rokem +6

      @@sherlock7687 Narc parents think they have the right to interfere in your life at any given time. They will even override your decisions at will despite the fact that you are an adult.

    • @chelseymcgee484
      @chelseymcgee484 Před rokem

      I’ve been struggling on how to feel about my siblings.
      They are watching her hurt me, watching me struggle.
      I dunno. I’m prolly wrong for thinking that way.

    • @thealchemist333
      @thealchemist333 Před rokem

      ​​​​​@@chelseymcgee484it's called narcissitic sibling abuse
      Your sibling may also more than likely be a narcissist. You are probably used to them dismissing your feelings, that's why you are unsure or dismissing your own feelings. Start trusting in and prioritizing yourself and watch them carefully.
      It's shocking once you start uncovering who they really are.
      I saw a lot of ugly strange behaviors mixed with kindness from my sister over the past 30 years. It was very confusing. After I learned about narcissistic personality disorder and easily recognized it in my ex friends, I started to recognize that is what I had been dealing with from my sister and my parents. I only discovered narcisstic personality disorder in the last 6 years, but have suffered from the toxic family for years. It is always mixed with kindness
      My sister lies a lot and turns my nieces against me as well
      We are now, no contact and I'm glad. I have grown stronger and feel no need to be around them or anyone who exhibits this behavior
      If you suspect your siblings are narcs, it is important that you are very cautious and start distancing yourself from them. They will also turn their children against you
      It may hurt because u love them, but they only live to betray and try to destroy you.
      I also went through a lot of physical illness from the toxicity. Check out some videos on narcissitic sibling abuse.
      Also don't tell them if you've caught on that they are narcs.
      I made that mistake and my sister switches up and pretends she's the empath and tries to make me out to be the narc.
      Good luck and may God bless your steps✨✨😐.

  • @inakale
    @inakale Před rokem +12

    Absolutely 💯💯💯 correct! Also narcissist has a (very limited) ability to connect with empath on a deep levels, which neurotypical people can't do and he use it to keep empath around, faking that connection as reliable.

  • @keithkerrigan9087
    @keithkerrigan9087 Před rokem +4

    I was in a friend ship relationship with a narcissistic for 7 yrs. Then I ran across your videos. An with in a year. I am now.
    NO CONTACT an free. My soul is coming g back.
    Thank you. I love you for sharing.

  • @southernexposure123
    @southernexposure123 Před rokem +5

    For someone who is empathetic when the "n" leaves the empath can get approached by other "n"s. If the empathetic person doesn't realize the mechanics of each condition they'll get in a new prison with a diffrent person or more than one new "n". It can be disasterous for the empath.
    I've noticed 4 "n"s in the last few year. I usually can spot them quickly and can avoid getting involved in their game. What a blessing

  • @tajhayes7841
    @tajhayes7841 Před 8 měsíci +4

    I just "walked away" frm a narcissist tht found it 2 hard 2 B considerate towards ANYONE & I just CN'T B around someone who has put themselves on some kinda pedestal & feels they can do ppl any kinda way

  • @Mossy-Rock
    @Mossy-Rock Před rokem +6

    Thank you for this. I believe that empaths are often simply caught unaware of what they are entering into. Yes, it is an empath's natural way to listen to a person in order to attempt to understand and connect with them or even comfort them (if they are expressing some sort of emotional or physical pain) but unless we know what to look out for - which takes training and experience - then we may have just stumbled into a dangerous situation. It may take considerable time to determine what they are all about, and by that time, we are fully engaged. My advice to empaths is approach each new person cautiously and with their guard up until you have a good understanding of what they are all about.

  • @67sdd
    @67sdd Před rokem +11

    That was us. Like right out of the textbook, the first month was all fireworks. Of course she turned toxic, embarked on affairs. After a lot of damage I got wise and got away. I learned my own role in allowing my self to be taken, etc. It was a painful but also arguably the best lesson in my life.

  • @MaryTongx
    @MaryTongx Před rokem +104

    Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her

    • @DarylSimpson58
      @DarylSimpson58 Před rokem +1

      its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but i couldnt just let her go i did all i could to get her back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring her back

    • @MaryTongx
      @MaryTongx Před rokem

      @@DarylSimpson58 Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach her?

    • @DarylSimpson58
      @DarylSimpson58 Před rokem

      @@MaryTongx Her name is *Victoria Lee hess*, and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.

    • @MaryTongx
      @MaryTongx Před rokem

      @@DarylSimpson58 Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive

    • @lennyluzitano8920
      @lennyluzitano8920 Před rokem

      Yes..we both have a baby girl who is naughty...you must realize..what you are dealing with 8:01 .its ok to love her as i do...my coo coo female narc.......education is important to protect yourself....yes I now distance myself..from my baby girl....but I don't go no contact....

  • @georgegavallos4519
    @georgegavallos4519 Před rokem +10

    Spot on Jill. Thank you. My blessing was I was discarded by my Narc spouse of 38 years. It was a God send, escape hatch to my survival. I see a trend and pattern: Narc/Empath, slothfulness/ virtuousness, Demonic/ Angelic, Evil/ Good. This is a Spiritual battle, as goodness will conquer the evil. Evil leads to death. Love leads to eternal life. Exact opposites. …….Evil spelled backwards is Live. Coincidence???

    • @johngmulhatton9794
      @johngmulhatton9794 Před rokem +1

      I have tried my level best to change the attitude of my Narc wife for many years, but nothing in this world will be able to change her ways. I am, I will, You will not, You may not, just never ends. But I was warned, sadly the night before our wedding, and have put up with this trash for the sake of my children. I grew up in such a home and eventually just packed my belongings and started my own new life. Perhaps I need consider seriously doing it again even though I am now a lot older but a reasonably healthy 78 year old.

    • @georgegavallos4519
      @georgegavallos4519 Před rokem

      @@johngmulhatton9794
      I feel your pain brother. May you live the rest of your life in peace and happiness.

  • @mtan4789
    @mtan4789 Před 10 měsíci +4

    This describe me to a T, I am the empath.
    My partner is the other, narcissist!
    He left me 8 weeks or so a go, I am still very much in love with him.
    After listening to this podcast .. I’m a little glad he left me.
    Now .. I have to pick up the pieces that he broke so bad, which is my heart.

    • @dr43-35
      @dr43-35 Před 3 dny

      the narcissist left you?!!.. count it a blessing.. and God help you to find your true love,. Your true love to find you ✨💖

  • @csh43166
    @csh43166 Před rokem +29

    This really hit me - especially the narcistic parent >>> narcistic partner connection. My relationships over the years have not gone well and I was just talking to my incredible psychiatrist a couple of weeks ago about knowing WHY you keep making the same mistakes over and over is key to stop making them. He agreed, and this really tracks with that. And I have been exploring that very thing. This was amazing information, Jill - thank you for all you do!!

    • @neliamacias4255
      @neliamacias4255 Před rokem +2

      Me too! Hard to finalized my decision

    • @caroleminke6116
      @caroleminke6116 Před rokem

      We really want to reach that narcissistic parent with our love so we keep repeating the pattern but each time getting closer to that truth ❤️‍🩹 we cannot save them with love they Don’t Want or even relate to… it’s just their lust for power & they will never get it 😢

  • @demigaines5644
    @demigaines5644 Před rokem +10

    Thank you So Very much for Sharing This
    You Are Absolutely Right.I Was In A 8 Year Relationship With An Overt Malignant Narcissist
    I Thought That I Could Change The Narcissist I Would Continue to Let The Narcissist Abuse Me
    The Abuse Became Worse.After I Was Horribly Discarded.
    I Began Researching Tryin To Find A Therapist.
    I Began Disconnecting From The Narcissist .
    I Found The Courage To Block This Person !! Narcissistic abuse is Brutal

    • @racso1160
      @racso1160 Před rokem +1

      Everystory looks pretty much the same ... why his it ? How come people have the same behaviors .. gaslighting , blame shifting , discard , hoovering , live the same things .. acrross the globe ? our energy attracts them .. ? My hole family are hight on the scale 4 sure .. just found out 1 year ago .. doin therapy .my hole life was a lie .. nothing makes sense anymore .. and theres no one to help or understand ... why ?

  • @citava88
    @citava88 Před 10 měsíci +8

    My narcissistic husband literally started to suck the life out of me. I started to have seizures last year now I am epileptic. I realize he is narcissistic that he will never change even though I love him so much and I feel like half of me is dead now I did leave him months ago, Lord Jesus, pray for my soul pray for my body pray for my mind my energy has been low, but I am fighting hard. I still have the business doing hair tattoos now working for corporate every day with maybe a day off every several weeks I’m trying. I’m trying this video right here though. Definitely helps. I appreciate you.

    • @hananbk37
      @hananbk37 Před 8 měsíci

      Im an emapth. How r u now?

    • @medsattic1036
      @medsattic1036 Před 4 měsíci +1

      I’m praying for you both

    • @dr43-35
      @dr43-35 Před 3 dny

      🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻✨💖

  • @anneaires3984
    @anneaires3984 Před rokem +11

    My question is did the narcissist ever even "like," the person, at any point, or was it all a grand illusion from the get go......was anything ever real or do these people have zero feelings 24/7......are they human?

    • @kasumikiku4665
      @kasumikiku4665 Před 5 měsíci

      I think they do still care they are still humans

    • @anneaires3984
      @anneaires3984 Před 5 měsíci

      @@kasumikiku4665 Thanks for your reply...... All the best!

  • @m.f.richardson1602
    @m.f.richardson1602 Před rokem +10

    Another good reason to only have a very few people in my circle.
    Thank you
    Peace 💕🇺🇲

  • @figment3242
    @figment3242 Před rokem +5

    Thank you! This has really helped me put everything together that the person I’ve been trying to help is the “Nice Guy” narcissist. Since I have removed them from my daily life I’ve been so filled with love and energy that I’d not realized how tapped I was over the last 3 years. Through this I’m finding the want to love and protect myself, and I have experienced an awakening of sorts.

  • @prant8998
    @prant8998 Před 2 měsíci +1

    Great video. My experience was similar and it took years to finally get out for good. There were many breakups and I told her toward the end that I had just about had it with whole tantrum devaluation BS she would pull. The last time, it was not even a big deal, but I told myself I was never going through another one of her, “episodes.” We weren't married, I grabbed what was mine and my dog and out the door. I set a boundary, and she crossed it many times, but I had all I was going to take. I read someplace that women, “should not mistake kindness, for weakness.” Nice guys, get taken advantage of. You have to tell them verbally, what the deal is when you are treated badly. Anyone is expendable if you are getting abused. You have to take care of number and one, and that’s YOU.

  • @luigij.7448
    @luigij.7448 Před rokem +7

    This is EXACTLY what happened to me. THANK YOU for putting it here in very simple words, concepts, I feel so relieved just because I now know how to explain it to me.

  • @sistersusie8569
    @sistersusie8569 Před rokem +4

    WOW! As someone who was raised in a time and culture where deep personal understandings were non-existent, these insights are blowing away the final cobwebs of a mess founded on toxic assumptions + pernicious threats (latter being unspoken - only intimated - to avoid accusations and disclosure). Thankyou. Although unpacking the necessary truth that sets free can take a lifetime of work, it is possible to get there eventually, overcoming all gaslighting and abuse of power.

  • @tonylangridge3003
    @tonylangridge3003 Před 3 měsíci +1

    What a fantastic video I have just realised as an empath myself the person I was with is a narcissist and I've been stuck for 11 years with her
    Thank you so much 👍

  • @thename9552
    @thename9552 Před rokem +13

    Narcissists are so abusive. 😢

    • @yvonneholmes2990
      @yvonneholmes2990 Před rokem +1

      Iam a total empath...I now realise my narc sister ......younger....made my life, my parents, and her Husbands life a complete misery. My one big secret is both my parents told me before they died was what a bitch she was, she tried to split the family up and bled Dad dry...his exact words. Her lovely Husband nearly left her but she suckered him back in. She acts like lady shite in public, but is poisonous behind closed doors. We havnt spoken in three years since Dads funeral as she played yet another vile trick on me and my other sister. I loathe her with a passion...

  • @guntertorfs6486
    @guntertorfs6486 Před rokem +15

    Very well and clearly explained , as always.The way you explain this dynamic + the vibe you have while doing so ( your expression and tone ) is very typical for a real empath : difficult to hide and therefore like catnip to narcissistic people , but of course you already are very aware of this. No reason for an empath to change her/his nature , because it is a beautiful one. Nice , summery dress by the way.

  • @scleo1959
    @scleo1959 Před rokem +6

    What a brilliant video. You are one of the smartest, insightful teachers of narcissism on the internet. I always watch. Thank you, thank you. Such clarity!

  • @heaven-is-real
    @heaven-is-real Před 8 měsíci +3

    Be very careful thinking you can heal people who don’t think they’re sick.

  • @anneaires3984
    @anneaires3984 Před rokem +10

    I'm new here and your explanation is so spot on...... Parasite, wow, what a powerful description....and so damned true......many thanks for your terrific content.....its so very helpful!❤

  • @burymeinbaldwin5896
    @burymeinbaldwin5896 Před rokem +7

    This is great. After healing and still learning, I love these subtle lessons along the way.
    You're work is appreciated.

  • @furrysfriend5150
    @furrysfriend5150 Před rokem +2

    My friend is a Narcissist and I am a emptheth. He has been treating me like an enemy for 15 years.

  • @jeanlittle405
    @jeanlittle405 Před rokem +3

    This is the best video you have ever done!!!!! Thank you very much and God bless you!!!

  • @Genise1313dirtydino
    @Genise1313dirtydino Před 7 měsíci +2

    24 yrs!😵‍💫 and i have just now figured this out! I was thinking i was crazy! Ive been so sad, lonely, angery, and broken! I dont kno how to begin to get away? Scared and kinda of relieved! I don't even kno how to talk to him any more! Mayb i should sent him this video? 😳👣👣

  • @Evilmindy12
    @Evilmindy12 Před rokem +3

    In my experience with narcissists(mom is covert narcissist and exes) they’re really hurt /insecure people, who unfortunately never started the process of healing from any wrongdoings that happened in their lives. It’s a sad place to be tbh, but worse to be on the receiving end of a narcissist. Once you figure it out please add enough space so you can heal and not turn into a narcissist yourself.

  • @EMILYHERRERA
    @EMILYHERRERA Před rokem +5

    This thing, as it seems to be called an empath here, is very cluster b in nature. What they're doing is projecting their own highly compartmentalized feelings onto others while not knowing they're theirs. The loyalty piece fits there too & with codependency. The most common way to see these two intertwined is a borderline with a narcissist. You can't just feel someone else and their feelings- it's projection. Which is also self-obsession. I'm not saying this is *always* BPD, but it's usually a personality disorder, for both of them. Neither of them are healthy. Other people call those who refer to themselves as Empaths actual narcissists. This is different than the highly sensitive person.

  • @stephenleguern444
    @stephenleguern444 Před rokem +5

    Thank you I’m an empath hooked on an evil narcissist father. He’ll be dead soon and I will finally be free of him.

    • @MaryAnnEllison
      @MaryAnnEllison Před rokem +3

      Watch out! They can haunt you from the grave.

  • @caroleminke6116
    @caroleminke6116 Před rokem +2

    I have empath traits that got validated thru many different sources, but now I doubt myself after years of abuse… sometimes I wonder if it’s just quiet BPD or maybe codependency 🤦‍♀️ my ability to engage with the gifts isn’t in question here, but rather it’s the inability to detach from my abuser. I’ve just gray rocked myself out of a dangerous situation for the third time… he disappeared from my home while I was out walking & I know that’s lucky for me. Yet I fear some kind of a repetition compulsion will make me feel the need to rescue another narcissist. My father was malignant & this latest was at least that or perhaps Dark Triad…Their vengeance is truly awful, which now convinces me that the autoerotic nature of the personality disorder is deeply rooted in some disturbing misogyny from childhood. This is way beyond any kind of attachment disorder. He’s 72 & his mother is still alive @ 92! After years of appearing to be the ideal child as her eldest, he now says she’s grandma Moses & no longer visits or sends flowers. When she dies, he is finally going to go through separation from her 🙎‍♀️ I won’t be there to pick up his 2 year old mess! Golden high chair behavior at its worst 👶

  • @douglasfrederick127
    @douglasfrederick127 Před rokem +7

    Awesome as usual Jill. Thank you!!

  • @franksimmons9242
    @franksimmons9242 Před rokem +1

    All of this can happen in a few encounters or it can be drawn out for decades but the point seems to be the same. Create confusion and cognitive dissonance. All of them are unreasonable and illogical even uncanny. It doesn't have to be a long-term relationship. Could be a promise for a job or something and they love the look on your face when you try to hide your disappointment. Thanks for breaking it down Jill! It can feel like driving through a blizzard but we know storms don't last. Still gotta get through slow down and focus. Thanks for your help with focusing and sorting these things out. You and your work are deeply appreciated.

  • @VoxLesPaul
    @VoxLesPaul Před rokem +3

    Wow, Jill, as you describe these characteristics, my relationship with my now-ex-wife narc (as well as one of my parents) was painted out before my eyes. And, the projection (6:10) and discard (6:48) involved - you are right on the mark. I am an empath. Thank you for this video.

  • @kcsunnyone
    @kcsunnyone Před rokem +13

    Do you think empaths are created as a result of being abused by narcissists or are some people just born that way?

    • @MoPoppins
      @MoPoppins Před rokem +6

      Born that way. Same w/ narcs. I know that some people say that narcs become that way as a result of abuse, but empaths are abused (probably more than any other subgroup), and not only vow never to treat others the way they were treated (which actually isn’t hard for an empath), but do everything in their power to make certain OTHERS never get mistreated, either.

    • @SidNasir
      @SidNasir Před rokem +8

      We are all born innocent. The environment shapes who we are. We make the decisions to become who we want to be based on out environment.

    • @MoPoppins
      @MoPoppins Před rokem +2

      @@SidNasir I’m an empath from an all-narc family. There’s no point in my siblings’ socialization process that influenced them to develop differently than I.
      They’ve always been self-centered, entitled, and with no capacity for empathy or remorse.
      It’s completely innate.

    • @MoPoppins
      @MoPoppins Před rokem +5

      @@SidNasir I beg to disagree. Some are bad seeds, and come into the world w/ the intent to create chaos & destruction. They know better, but have NO desire to do better.
      People aren’t narcissistic/evil because they’ve been damaged by others-they are so because they have no interest or inclination to be a better person. There’s LITERALLY nothing stopping them from changing….NOTHING.

    • @charlesagibb6593
      @charlesagibb6593 Před rokem +3

      @@SidNasir Well said! We all have choice as to how we treat others. Don't let the narc drag you into the mud with them.

  • @M-eb3ss
    @M-eb3ss Před 10 měsíci +1

    Perfect msg to educate people to protect themselves.
    Thank you.

  • @Soralella71
    @Soralella71 Před 2 měsíci

    I was raised by a narcissist. As a consequence, I have never been attracted to narcissists and I have never had a relationship with one. I can spot them from a distance. They disgust me and I have no time to waste with them. After being abused as a child, never again. Never.

  • @Vicmot
    @Vicmot Před rokem +1

    Im an Empath who had to spend entire chilfhood with narsiccist psychopath. Well it but but tore me and my life apart, damaging mentally, emotionally irreversible.

  • @SpecialAgent666
    @SpecialAgent666 Před 10 měsíci +2

    Ofcourse this generic information depends on the actual Empath or Narcissist involved. I’ve never felt attached to a Narcissist or needed one. I employ techniques not to attract them either and was doing well until recent.

  • @JJ-mh4xd
    @JJ-mh4xd Před rokem +2

    SO true the cycle is awful

  • @izawaniek2568
    @izawaniek2568 Před 10 měsíci +1

    Thank you. You are right❤

  • @donnahale1011
    @donnahale1011 Před rokem +1

    This is good information. I dealt with what I know now 2 b a narc for 15 years off and on but I finally left once I know what a narc was and I'm GLAD!!!!

  • @dr43-35
    @dr43-35 Před 3 dny

    Oh mine goshh.. so short and precise definition.. thank you

  • @dancmarik8620
    @dancmarik8620 Před 3 měsíci

    One of my friends who is a narcissist believes they are an empath.Of course!Why wouldn't they!

  • @mynameis1975
    @mynameis1975 Před rokem +6

    OMG I really felt like you were talking about me with my covert (ex) husband, who exploited my overprotective and good disposition just to (try to) fool me every time better. That it is: often a super empath is not only a super sensitive person, but a smart minded one that can overturn the situation in their favor. That's exactly what I was finally able to do after 7 years of torture/marriage and a 4 years daughter with this individual I should never have had even a conversation with. They are such stupid individuals in the end. They consider themselves as the cunniest chaps in the world. A bit of tactful diplomatic silence to get the proofs of their bad habits running at your back, a bit of patience and you can finally get rid of these kind of clowns. Do it in a way that they will remain so astonished and puzzled, that they loose any capacity to recognize you and willing to even try to take again advantage of your good nature. Shut the door and leave their scar for ever opened. May be they will become a better person, being alone and abandoned. They will grow into adults, finally, stumbling straight against that wall.

    • @charlesagibb6593
      @charlesagibb6593 Před rokem +2

      The fatal flaw in an empath is expecting the narcissist to change, or show genuine remorse. They will show remorse, but it is never heart-felt. As for being on their own, my narc is never alone, I believe not having someone else's emotions to feed on leaves the narcissist empty and craving a ( hit of love). As they age they get more and more accomplished at jumping from one relationship too another ( often having the new supply ready to go) before discarding the present supply. Some supplies are public knowledge, others remain secret. Supply takes many forms , a lover, friend, or their children. What an empath views as a person with feelings, the narcissist views as an object which has to provide emotions they themselves cannot create within. They are poor broken creatures. Whatever you do, show them no pity, they will exploit your compassion and take as long as you will give. Focus on the peace and calm possible now that they are not around.

    • @mynameis1975
      @mynameis1975 Před rokem

      @@charlesagibb6593 I agree, unfortunately I cannot imagine that people cannot ever change. I always hope he will change or at least learn a lesson. But for God's sake, I don't want him back! I am satisfied today, because he thought he could count on my apparent submissiveness forever. And instead I very patiently led him to scorched earth around, I used his delusions of grandeur against him, It's not for all narcissists so easy to find suppliers, ready meals that fast. He was left in a bad way by me legally and all his friends are gone. His mistresses did the same. I worked so hard, so many years in advance to get to this result. It took me immense patience and now I enjoy the peace of watching him destroy himself with his own hands. He is alone and abandoned by everyone. In all these years I also worked on myself and strengthened everything: my economic emancipation, my friendships, solid relationships with my family of origin. I even prepared my 4-year-old daughter while breastfeeding her! To make you understand. The narcissist is always going to be either used themselves or left alone by everyone.

  • @TheSimmpleTruth
    @TheSimmpleTruth Před 10 dny

    I have a friend who grew up with a physically, mentally, and emotionally abusive alcoholic father who threatened to kill her many times. I met her when she was a teenager. By then, she had already developed an eating disorder and was extremely obese. Food was, and still is, her only way to feel better. However, in the last few years, she has started developing narcissistic traits.
    At first, I thought she told herself she was beautiful, perfect, and capable of doing anything she wanted as a defense mechanism to overcome her low self-esteem. But then it got worse. She now claims she is better than other people at church, in all of her jobs, and even in relationships. She hasn’t had a boyfriend, but she believes she is an expert in romantic relationships and gives advice to everyone because “she knows better.” She even “preaches” to adults much older than her, who have had far more experiences and relationships, to the point that I feel embarrassed when I’m with her.
    Another thing is that she LOVES and actively seeks adulation and praise. She goes out of her way to ensure you compliment her in some way, and you can see how much she enjoys it when you do. However, if you say something negative, she gets teary-eyed. She even makes up stories where she claims to have been highly praised, and she doubles down on them, even when I know they aren’t true because I was there.
    The list of examples is very long, but she definitely thinks she is better than everyone else in every aspect of life. Her comments put me down, and it is getting out of hand. She has already lost two or three friends who no longer want to hang out with her.

  • @user-hl8bm7cb1m
    @user-hl8bm7cb1m Před 8 měsíci +1

    I came to realise that I have been living with the idiot when I every day felt so bad and sick of what didn't feel like my own problems, I knew that the bad feelings covering me were that of this demon,when I'm away from him i feel pretty good and then getting back i feel devilish 😢again, they're real demons

  • @mariposasuena8454
    @mariposasuena8454 Před 10 měsíci +1

    Thank ou for this spot on analysis!

  • @STAR-LIGHT.1111
    @STAR-LIGHT.1111 Před 10 měsíci +1

    I have the idea that he knew what he was doing... He even devalued me and acted nice on the same time how crazy making is that.. He knew i needed his validation and talked about the traumabond. And offcourse i'm the bad one. I left soon after that he tried to control me with religion.

  • @johnmaurer2035
    @johnmaurer2035 Před rokem +1

    That’s just the way it went down.

  • @willywit2194
    @willywit2194 Před rokem +1

    Thank you for sharing.

  • @dwddavidsway4701
    @dwddavidsway4701 Před 7 měsíci +1

    Empath + Narcissist = Dread ~ the true meaning of END . . .
    You are a prize Jill Wise, thank you for all of your gifts of trUth! Beautiful indeed!
    I am addicted to Happiness and peace . . . And dancing on my twoedged swords, hahaha!
    Praise God in heaven always
    Peace,~Dwd~

  • @mcdee56
    @mcdee56 Před rokem +1

    Many thanks, Sister!

  • @pooru1231
    @pooru1231 Před rokem +1

    Wow so you just explained my living situation, i am the bottom unit and the neighbor at the top. Maybe 2 narcs as the neighbor and myself as the empath. I get why now my situation is so frustrating haha.

  • @gracemitchell3633
    @gracemitchell3633 Před měsícem

    You described my situation perfectly

  • @jillallcock
    @jillallcock Před rokem +2

    Ty for this video..... BLESS 🙏

  • @andreaboyd3942
    @andreaboyd3942 Před měsícem

    What a mother of all video!!!!!

  • @rhondacooper7957
    @rhondacooper7957 Před rokem +3

    I believe lack of knowledge about NPD; is why narc and empath are attracted to each other.

  • @williamstuck6344
    @williamstuck6344 Před rokem +1

    Damn😢 that hit hard thank you for making this video, I am currently the Empath in this situation. I don’t know if I could just give up though

  • @sharonbice7490
    @sharonbice7490 Před 29 dny

    You nailed it girl. 👏

  • @heathermixson1265
    @heathermixson1265 Před rokem +1

    Thank you Jill❤

  • @SalmanKhan-ft5lj
    @SalmanKhan-ft5lj Před 8 měsíci

    That’s accurate
    When they lost control they blamed you are not anymore that much caring

  • @johnmorganjr769
    @johnmorganjr769 Před měsícem

    Thank you Maam. 💯 👍

  • @tammyfitzgerald5336
    @tammyfitzgerald5336 Před 6 měsíci

    A relationship takes a lot longer than the time they on 🙏🙏🙏🙌🙌🙌🙌run

  • @GoBeavs92
    @GoBeavs92 Před 7 měsíci

    My ex girlfriend is a narcissist and I'm an empath. She sure did a number on me. It became incredibly toxic and scary at the end. I was afraid she'd kill me, literally murder me. I'm so lucky I escaped.

  • @timothythegreat6294
    @timothythegreat6294 Před rokem +1

    you are great

  • @sandraursenbacher3222
    @sandraursenbacher3222 Před měsícem

    Yep- very true

  • @ScuitarRects
    @ScuitarRects Před 6 měsíci

    I am blessed, Thank yoU🌸

  • @watcher4887
    @watcher4887 Před 2 měsíci

    Thats wonderful !

  • @FridayStranger
    @FridayStranger Před rokem +1

    Really like your top/dress! Great choice!

  • @karla1926
    @karla1926 Před 11 měsíci +1

    Im extremely anxious sensible en pathetic married to a man whos manipulated me all my life he doesnt care my needs my feelings my opinion i was diagnosed with costochondritis due to my high stress my mental and physical health is ruined i dont know how to put boundaries or stand up for my self i feel like im dying slowly

  • @lisafletcher8676
    @lisafletcher8676 Před 10 měsíci

    This is so true i have been there

  • @stephenleguern444
    @stephenleguern444 Před rokem +2

    I would like your coaching also to get through what he did to me.

  • @user-py6te4ym2s
    @user-py6te4ym2s Před 7 měsíci

    Thank you

  • @nooname9176
    @nooname9176 Před 4 měsíci

    I can tell you more about those differences between a fiend and a friend.

  • @stephenleguern444
    @stephenleguern444 Před rokem +2

    So pretty 😮

  • @jessmason2112
    @jessmason2112 Před rokem +5

    ❤💯, one giveaway is the shit-ass smirk the narcs get when their angle or drama scene is bought or believed. If you're a seasoned empath or super empath you will pick up on that fact immediately and file that under,🚩 You get 3 red flags you go under a street investigation. That's just how I roll.

    • @Matt-602
      @Matt-602 Před rokem +3

      I am so glad that many people like yourself have mentioned the classic narcissistic smirk. They will often try to hide it but you will catch it because they're almost too embarrassed to be flashing that grin

    • @jessmason2112
      @jessmason2112 Před rokem +3

      @@Matt-602 The funny 😄 part which isn't really funny, but amusing to an empath is they think they are so smart. Reading that requires reading their eyes, facial expressions, and demeanor. I'm 👊🫴🎩 a seasoned Veteran. I've been abused, taken advantage of and discriminated against, my whole life . I'm hard working MFER. No one is going to tell me any different.

    • @survivor9898
      @survivor9898 Před rokem

      Anyone ever see a narsastist on meth grin?🤔

    • @jessmason2112
      @jessmason2112 Před rokem +2

      @@survivor9898 Have you ever tossed a narcissist out of your house on their ass? There is humor there as their ego is crushed and they don't know what to do or say. They lost like they were looking for their lost dog.

  • @pooru1231
    @pooru1231 Před rokem

    Wow you explained the difference really well

  • @MrJarhead2005
    @MrJarhead2005 Před rokem +1

    Question, sounds very familiar but can an empath have a severe reaction and become aggressive after the narcissist has discarded them to try and save the relationship or get back at them?

  • @singerii
    @singerii Před rokem +1

    I have a issue I am thinking about.. I told the CN to move out some moths ago. Still, we are in the same motorcycle community so I would run into her from time to time. Now, she has allready gotten her two new supply-friends...just friends (yea, right)...so far I have hold total no contact with the new supplies along with her.
    These supplies has tried to cheers with me, but I grey rocked them.
    Now, my issue is: Is this actually that smart?
    Should I rather just do random small talk with them?.. showing they are no threat to me? ..and in the same time..will it deweponize the CN from jusing them to cause visible distress for the CN to see? any thoughts?

  • @chancebutler6472
    @chancebutler6472 Před 10 měsíci +1

    thank you this helped me a lot. you might get a kick out of me saying, but how come youre so sure that its permanent, and that we cant help them :( haha.. i sound so stereotypical right now. its just that not only do i see some ppl sort of narcissistic with one person in their life, then empathetic to someone else. but also i used to be a cheater and although i didnt insult them or try to hurt them after i did have some negative actions that i learned to stop, before having to face the karma for my actions believe it or not. i feel like it equally seems like this is my negative karma in return, while i sound delusional as hell at the same time ~.~ maybe the world isnt binary lol

  • @AA-cb7dz
    @AA-cb7dz Před 4 měsíci

    Empath networks are difficult to control because they automatically connect to everything.