This is a huge system failure, high school and middle school students shouldn’t have to worry about whether mom or dad have their medication, and there should be incentives for lower-income families to get at-home care so the kids can focus on being kids, shame on the system…
If our food supply wasn’t actively invested in making us sick and our government actually looked out for its citizens we wouldn’t be here right now. But people actively overlook this.
At age 13 my mom became paralyzed from the neck down. I became her caregiver for many years. Medication, transfers, feeding, bed baths, stretches, waking up at night, etc. Everyone always praised me, but no one ever seen me. Even as an adult, I still suffer emotionally from it. I'm so glad that there's finally advocacy for children caregivers. I hope that they know if they decide that it's too much for them to handle, that they are not selfish or evil and they deserve to live the life they want as well.
kids in Africa, Japan, and Mexico love taking care of their parents and does well in school. I bet most of the children that are complaining, they love taking care of their sick, dog, cat, horse and etc... more then they like taking care of their parents. But 13 is a very young age to do it by your self and every one should have help instead of throwing your parents in a home.
@@EricaEarth how do you know they love it? It’s stressful and exhausting. I did it! You traveled to this places and asked around? I bet they’d take any chance to live a normal life and just be young. We’re not talking about Africa. It’s America and these kids are parentified. It’s abusive.
If we don’t nobody will. Best thing to do is be able to have help for when we become adults. They did not for me but I’m working it out unfortunately. It’s kind of weird when you don’t understand why you’re depressed until you’re an adult and realizes “oh I was dealing with a vulnerable adult”. At least the parents are nice and beautiful people. They are learning lessons about life.
@@buttermepancake3613I came here to say this. People shouldn’t have children with the intent that said child will be responsible for their care when they’re old/older.
Jacob was my student last school year in 8th grade and is one of the most extraordinary individuals that I have ever met. He is smart, witty, and very talented in Chorus!!! Jacob will always be one of my most favorite people!!!! I am so very proud of him!!! It is an honor to know him!!!
May God always bless these child caregivers and keep them safe and healthy. May their sick parents also get well and live longer to see their children achieve their dreams.
Do you have any advice on how to give support to someone in your situation. I try my best to be supportive of my loved that will soon have to care for their family member but I don't know how. Thank you in advance
I'm 38 now. I was an adult caregiver for my dad when I was 22 until he passed away when I was 26. He had a heart attack and while he was recovering, he had a small stroke that affected his left side. He could still speak, but he was unable to walk or use this left side, so he became housebound. I had to help him from his bed when he woke up, help him to the bathroom and help him bathe, make his food, breakfast, lunch, and dinner and also help check his blood sugar and give him insulin, he was also a type 2 diabetic. I also basically kept him company. My sister took him to doctor appoints and hospital visits while I stayed at home. I was suffering from my own mental health issues, I couldn't leave my home and had terrible panic attacks when I did, so I naturally stayed home and took care of my dad. It was exhausting. I couldn't really focus on my own mental health, and I had already missed out on my college experience at that age. I felt like I was sooooo behind on everything. I still do.
I feel you~~~ it probably was a relief when he passed. Not bc you didn’t love him but bc the care you had to give him was more than anyone can handle. I hope you come to terms with his passing and that everyday you start coming out of your shell and to start living life for yourself🩵 YOU DESERVE IT!! You deserve to have a life of your own too!
I started being a caregiver for my mom at 22, bc of her ms. I’m 27 now and I love her but I’m just so tired and feel like I’m going nowhere. No money, no education. I feel so behind. I wanna choose myself but it’s hard.
Same. I'm 38 and helped dad. My dad was older. My siblings helped. I was the patient one. I did everything I could because He was an older guy. It was my pleasure. I put my life on hold n it was ok. I'm living it up now.
Bless all of you, I hope you all get to have the experiences that you wanted out of life after helping to care for your loved ones. If you’re still doing that, hope you can find a way to get support. ❤
Shame on our government that has a huge military budget, but not a budget to help those in need via tax subsidized home health care since health insurance rarely covers expenses (also, many people who need help work or worked and paid taxes)
I'm 57 years old and take care of my mom with the help of my siblings. It's the most challenging thing I've ever done. NO a child should be in this position. It breaks my heart.
I took care of my mother: I didn’t have any help or support. No one believed me. It was unbelievable. People are so callous. They are so disrespectful and rude. I took care of everything. Now, I don’t have any help and/ or support. I learned a lot of painful lessons.
@@brandonl7110 My mother died relatively young. People didn’t believe me. They didn’t help. It doesn’t matter. It is done. I learned a lot of valuable lessons. No one cares about me. I paid for everything as far as her final expenses. I’m struggling financially as a result of it. I should’ve went on more trips.
When I became my uncle's caregiver, I was 19 years old in college, in an abusive relationship and had just fought off an eviction back in 2015. My uncle was in a nursing home and still is up to this day. We live in New York and there are too many problems with the health care system here. I found myself not being allowed to help him because I was his "niece." My cousin is also his niece and she has had a difficult time with health care professionals because she was a "niece." She is listed as his guardian and point of contact. We are constantly being dismissed almost every time we help our uncle. The system has a family tree problem. They have a problem with patients receiving support from distant relatives. We make sacrifices vouching and taking care of loved ones. Our uncle has rights and we have rights too!
It does not matter if you pay them a livable wage, a lot of insurance doesn't cover for a CNA, and if they do, it is for 2-3 hours(a day) a few times a week. You have to pay out of pocket for a nurse to come in to assist, reasons why it is mainly colored families going through this. They simply don't have the means to pay for a nurse out of pocket. Insurance is the problem.
Ppl are not working as CNA anymore it’s not worth it if u do get a CNA they are young under 20 and not experienced and are not serious about the job but can’t blame them they are so young
I was a CNA for 7 yrs I loved my patients, it was sad to see the only time they would get a bath was during my shift with them two days a week. Family didn’t care at all. I got married, pregnant and quit my job to be sahm best decision of my life.
And don’t forget to highlight how common it is for the adults to manipulate those kids, guilt trip them when they turn 18 and want to live normal lives. There is a layer of financial abuse and isolation that those kids deal with.
You are exactly right and it happened to me unfortunately. It got to the point I had to go no contact with my family. I didn’t ask to be born into a toxic and selfish family that treated me like crap as a kid and now want me to waste my best years being a caregiver because they made poor health decisions when they were younger. My childhood was traumatic and as soon as I was able to live on my own I did at the age of 19. I’m 29 now and I already made up my mind I don’t want kids because I don’t want them to feel obligated to do anything for me or burden them with my own consequences from my decisions.
@@layla37144 have an extra support system if it’s there. Burnout and frustration are real and having others to ask for help when needed is essential. Take breaks when you can and try to be as calm and kind as possible in tough situations. It’s a major stress to take on but you got to do what you got to do. If a support system isn’t around, try agencies and help groups in your area, contact the insurance and see if there’s a way to get home help or if there is a day care system that could be there.
I am an adult and I was assisting my mom with her care. It has been 4 yrs since she's been gone and she was diagnosed with Dementia. I miss her but it was such a relief when she passed on. In order not to get burned out some days I just literally ignored her and watched her from a near to ensure she did not get herself into harm's way. You have to remember to take of yourself too. If one has never been a caregiver you have no idea. And then to put these kids in this type of burden is so unfair. Where are these women spouses?
Working? Passed away? They are single? I was a caregiver to my husband for 1.5 years as he died from cancer. I understand the burden. It was exhausting and emotionally hard. It was also the most loving thing I've ever done for another human-- other-focused rather than self-focused.
The caretakers are the single ones that can’t get married bc that’s leaving the parent, not the rescued wives who’s husband can provide a nurse in place.
There should be better health insurance in our nation for sick people with chronic illnesses, people shouldn't have to choose between paying out of pocket for cna's or their own young children having to learn medical care before they're teenagers. Not fair.
We had very bad luck with a care agency that was paid through my father health insurance. When I wasn’t home, he got substandard care and my things were rifled through.
@@douba_plusa For some reason a lot of people think that when you take care of family like that you automatically want to work in the medical field. I am *100% certain* that I don't want to be a nurse or anything related to the profession after taking care of my elderly and great aunt and grandfather for 13 years. I loved them and loved taking care of them but doing it was not easy at all. It's more than preparing meals and medications and helping them in and out of bed. The part you don't see are for example, are instances when the person/people you're caring for are uncooperative and at times extremely combative when all you are trying to do is help. The good thing about caring for family is that you can at least plop down on a couch or maybe even climb in a bed and take a nap for a little while, or sit down on your laptop or phone and take a break or take a walk.-- *However* ,when you are in a clinical setting with patients who aren't your family you can't do that. On the other hand, there are people out there who are caregivers for family members and would love to also do it outside of a familial setting and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that- just like there is absolutely nothing wrong with people who are caregivers for family but don't want to do it outside of that setting.
Poor children, this definitely puts a strain on them. I was one of children, only difference is my mother was sick mentally and had an addiction. Like myself, these children, often times than not, do not themselves have the same support that a child their age would need. They will think back on their missed childhood and adolescence years and be filled with regret. They age up and become burnt out (young) adults who are tired physically and mentally, sometimes too tired to continue on to go on to do secondary education. In longer term, this isn’t good for them mentally and emotionally. They would truly be better off with an able bodied adult whose needs are best suited to support them in a loving less stressful environment, that they deserve and need in order to thrive to their fullest potential possible.
I understand completely. I’ve been a caregiver since I was 18 in 2002. I’ve worked in different types of facilities and in home. One thing I vowed to my son, IF anything happens to me I DO not want him caring for me . That is not his responsibility. He’s a child. I will make sure I find the proper facility and care team for me. I want him to grow up and be a child and I don’t want him loosing himself. He’s only 14. I’m now 40 and assist my mom due to her diagnosis of Parkinson’s about 5 years ago and it’s progressed. My mom was like Iam glad I didn’t get this diagnosis when u and you’re brother where kids. The burden it brings. I told her I would take care of her if it did, she’s like no, that’s no place for a child.
I was actually an adult caregiver for my mom myself. Even though it was mostly my dad and me doing it, this breaks my heart to learn that youth are becoming caregivers for their parents.
My brothers 17 year old girlfriend takes care of her 74 year old dad (disabled veteran) , and she feels obligated too because her mother died on Christmas Eve when she was 4 from cancer … her name is Angel because that’s exactly what she is …
I've been a caretaker, maid, medic, therapist and shopper for my parents since I was about 9 years old. Mom is a diabetic that didn't take care of herself and dad has bi-polar disorder, so taking care of both while I was growing up was quite a challenge. I never went to a school dance, never went to prom, never dated, never left the house for long periods of time for fear that they would need me to do something for them.
Where are the extended family members? Genuine friends? The camps and other organizations can help, but day to day living for these young care givers is crucial. It's frustrating and infuriating how so many people simply don't take an interest in others' suffering. Thankfully, these two families are so close and loving and that's their strength in persevering. We all need to reach out compassionately, but I don't have faith the situation will improve.
Yes it is hard. I remember when my mother was sick and it was just me and her in the home. I would make sure my mother was all set with food and everything before leaving for work. Bills still had to get paid. Everytime I would come home and see an ambulance near my home I would pray that it wasn't my mom.
Thank you! I was a child caregiver too for my dad beginning at around the ages of 7 and 8. This was back in 2002-2003 but for some reason my dad had a nervous breakdown and his diabetes had to be more closely looked at. My mom began working (which is/was good for her she wanted the job experience and i wanted her to see how much things have changed since the '80s and '90s) so with public elementary school and VA helping my dad get a right cocktail of meds it was very stressful and exhausting for me. I did all the housework, made the meals trying to make them like my mom was making them so we didn't often go out to eat or have TV dinners, laundry, keep the mobile home clean and took up sewing (that was a painful experience 😂) with my mom's sewing machine. I did everything and then some that my mom had been doing all so she could come home from work and actually get some rest and not have to bicker over something stupid with her husband. My dad wasn't always mentally there but he was getting better for the most part while i tried to keep as much stress and anxiety off of him as i could. I also tried to slowly encourage him to do some things that he could handle too which were all steps in the right direction. I don't think i was considered his caretaker anymore after I was around 13 though when he was actually getting better at least compared to before and my mom wasn't working anymore as well as his cocktail of meds working with his body.
@@candygirl9923I don’t know about that. My friend’s grandmother-my friend told me this story-when she had something like 6 young kids was told she had Polio. But SHE REFUSED to acknowledge it and let it stop her from living and taking care of her kids. So she acted like she didn’t have it. And apparently, she never let it stop her and debilitate her AND IT DIDN’T. She had it for sure BUT for her it was mind over matter.
It can be rewarding, but also extremely hard physically. I know of two sons that died one after the other while taking care of their mom. The last brother and a sister are left to take on the care of their mom. Very scary.
I was eighteen years old and my mom became sick but I took care of her. I'm a lot stronger for it. Thank you, young people for taking care of your family
Hugs and Love to these children and parents. I have PPMS since my girls were 3 & 6. My husband does so much, but they fill in when he’s not around. They’re my fine motor and mini chefs. I’m so grateful for my girls. They’re 11 & 14 now.
Facing much the same with fibro. My kids are much older now but my youngest in particular has had to be very independent and has definite anxiety from seeing me struggle to function.
I cared for my mom who was in her 80s and I was in my 50s. It was a HUGE resposibility. I CANNOT IMAGINE how these children cope emotionally. It can breed overthinking, anxiety and the need to control one's enviornment. But I pray that God blesses them with a sober mind and strength!!
I was an adult caregiver for my Mom until she died 8 years ago(R.I.P.). It was hard at times because it was always something that kept happening to her and she was stubborn at times. I miss her
I became a caregiver for my little brother in my early 20's in 2011, after he suffered a severe asthma attack that left permanently brain damaged. It's a massive responsibility. I hope these young, selfless kids get all the wonderful things they deserve in life❤
My mother was diagnosed almost two years ago with Lewy Body at 67; I had recognized years back unfortunately. I wish you the best and hope that you are able to find the best care for health management and long term care for yourself and that your son is equally assisted and finds strength and courage; all will be well😊
I did exactly that for my dad, who died in 1998. I was 15 years old when my dad was diagnosed with cancer. I changed my dads bandages, gave him his shots, and took his blood for diabetes. I am now caring for my mom, plus trying to grow my business. Bless anyone who does it. I love my parents a lot and want to be there for them.
I was my mom’s caregiver when she was diagnosed with cancer and she had prior chronic health conditions, she recently passed away and I have no idea what to do now.
Bless your soul 😢 Maybe start with writing a list of what you would like to try? Even simple things like joining a workout session with many people (like spinning) or visiting cafes?
I cared for my mom and dad since I was 4 years-old until they both passed away when I was 20. My mom had cancer and my dad had congestive heart failure. I never had a childhood and had to grow up incredibly quickly, and I’ve never been able to really do anything for myself. Would I go back and do it differently? Of course not. But now I’m in my early thirties with two young kids, no parents, and I have a heart condition and lupus. I feel absolutely horrible when my 5 and 6 year old try to help me because I want them to have a childhood and to be kids for as long as possible. They aren’t fully aware of my illnesses and I hope to keep it that way for a very long time.
I had to take care of my mom she was sick and it almost broke me and I’m an adult I can only imagine how hard for a child it’s not right for a child to have to do this so young the system is broken
May god bless these children and there parents/families in this life and the next. I am so grateful I had the opportunity to care for my mom, my grandmother's and my brother.
Sobbing.❤ I was a child caregiver from the time I was 7.5 years old to 18 years old when my mom passed. No adult family members helped or saw the problem in that. I'm still recovering from the damage it did to my body brain heart and life.
I took care of my parents as a caregiver as well. It is HARD and EXHAUSTING. I didn't go to college, I choose to take care of them. But they have since passed away. My mom passed away in 2018, My dad in 2022 and I am grateful for every moment I took care of them because I would never want them to go into a rehab. They were both in rehabs for a few months and the amount of health decline in those months was insane. I remember dropping my dad off at a rehab for them to watch him while I went on vacation for a week. The person who went in, was not the same person who went home and also passed away 3 days later. I had hesitation but I was so burnt out at that time taking care of him. I would do it all over again for both of my parents and I also would NEVER send them to any kind of rehab for any amount of time. I was there when my mom passed away, right in front of me. I am grateful to have been there but I remember every moment of seeing that while yes, it looked peaceful. It is still traumatizing. Unfortunately for my dad, he passed away at the hospital and they did not call me until he was actively passing away so I did not get there in time. It makes me angry. He was my best friend and I wasn't there to hold his hand. Our medical system is a bust all around.
I'm dating a man who grew up a caregiver for his parents. He was also forced to grow up quicker but also drop out of college. Has growing up like this affected you long-term? How can you be a supportive partner?
my mom just had a stroke, now she has aphasia, i'm 19 and i was supposed to be going to college now i can't anymore. i can't even get a job & my mother's man is upset he's paying the bills but im her caregiver here with her everyday. there is so much pressure on me right now. my sister and him want me to work then they don't, they get to live their lives while i have to give it up. i love my mom & i'd do anything for her, me and my mom have always struggled together and it sucks to see her like this and i have to do all this, i wish i could live my life unfortunately the universe had other plans for me. i hate myself.
I took care of my mom up until her death from cancer 2 weeks before my 19th birthday, so I definitely resonate. For me it was an honor to take care of my mother and I took real pride in it, although I know this is not any easy job for anyone. Thank you for sharing I didn't know about Kesem and hope to be a volunteer in the future for a chapter near me.
Teenagers, children, with a good head on their shoulders and love in their hearts for their parents who need them, not only for care giving but for the love, support and strength to continue their physical fight. Wow! God bless them and may He guide them all so these children may fulfill their wishes and goals.
I know how those children and teenagers feel I've been in their shoes. Now, I am 43 and still at this moment caring for my parents. I was 7 years old and my parents are refugees and I am the first generation in America. I didn't speak English. at the time ,I had to translate in Khmer to English. I respect, love and have integrity for the young ones all over the world that have these caregiving responsibilities for their elderly, young and old. ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
When I was 13 I took care of my dad till he passed of a stroke. I’m now 19, and doing the same with my mom. I just wish I had more of a childhood, but I’m glad I got to care for them as they did for me when I needed it❤
God will bless these children in so many ways in the future!!! It is tough on them, and I know it is a huge responsibility. Your parents will always be grateful to have wonderful children willing to do above and beyond like the ones in the video. God bless everyone who is willing to take the role of a caretaker and especially if it comes out of your heart. 💙
@@ramiroperez2461 Yes Ehlers Danlos Syndrome *** plus maybe 🤔 Mafan syndrome *** my new dr is contacting a geneticist to see how to get me tested . My mom nor my late father were well , especially my mom to begin with, HAVENT gotten a diagnosis yet but ALL the symptoms line up. Connective tissue disorders. An entire family affected by Very likely EDS…..my mom has had multiple hernia surgeries, a sliding hiatal hernia , can be a pain at times, OFTEN AS A CHILD I FELT I WOULD BE AN ORPHAN EARLY IN LIFE…..PARENTS IN HOSPITAL MULTIPLE TIMES AS A CHILD. FATHER HAD METABOLIC SYNDROME for years, overweight from when I was a baby , never saw my father well , he died shortly before my 20 birthday , brain cancer diagnosis to death 3 weeks. 🤯 Almost have lost my mom numerous times April 2022 high blood sugar, got under control, COVID in November 2022 , which we believe led to congestive heart failure and a pleural effusion (( on meds now )) neither of my parents cared for their health at all. Plus I have VERY LIKELY EDS ….EHLERS DANLOS SYNDROME AND MAYBE 🤔 MAFAN SYNDROME waiting to do genetic testing, but EDS lines up. I have been sickly all my life as well. An entire life almost 40 , 39 years of Drs appts. An entire family ruined by EDS. Plus extremely sick with ADDISONS DISEASE ADRENAL DYSFUNCTION.
No car , can’t drive , brain damage from multiple sources, taken transit everywhere or cabs, no rides, exhausting dragging myself everywhere. But my Faith sustains me.
Thank you @TODAYshow for this featured topic ! As a 43 year old mother, I reflect on caring for my father after he retired from the Military, faced dialysis and Stage 4 bone cancer. I thought it was normal that the family just expected it to be me & I served no complaint because that was MY DAD. But, seeing that it became the norm for many people in my family to just know I’d be the caretaker, I see me in the kids that you’ve mentioned. Thank you and please, please continue to fight to make additional programs available for kids to thrive, heal, cope & excel. 🙏🏽
This is a huge system failure, high school and middle school students shouldn’t have to worry about whether mom or dad have their medication, and there should be incentives for lower-income families to get at-home care so the kids can focus on being kids, shame on the system…
🙌🏽❤
GOD BLESS THEM!
If our food supply wasn’t actively invested in making us sick and our government actually looked out for its citizens we wouldn’t be here right now. But people actively overlook this.
Who exactly is going to care for them at home? You?
@@Rice10120nurses
The govt should provide nurses for families like this so the kids can have a normal life.
The nurse's have to want those jobs, and they don't. The government can't provide anything.
My thoughts exactly!!
I agree
@@Rice10120a lot of people want to be nurses, they just don’t get paid enough to stay involved
Oh they'll want the jobs if they pay enough and have great benefits.
At age 13 my mom became paralyzed from the neck down. I became her caregiver for many years. Medication, transfers, feeding, bed baths, stretches, waking up at night, etc. Everyone always praised me, but no one ever seen me. Even as an adult, I still suffer emotionally from it. I'm so glad that there's finally advocacy for children caregivers. I hope that they know if they decide that it's too much for them to handle, that they are not selfish or evil and they deserve to live the life they want as well.
kids in Africa, Japan, and Mexico love taking care of their parents and does well in school. I bet most of the children that are complaining, they love taking care of their sick, dog, cat, horse and etc... more then they like taking care of their parents. But 13 is a very young age to do it by your self and every one should have help instead of throwing your parents in a home.
Bless you for what you did. I hope you can look into your soul and reconnect with your childhood. As long as you are still alive, it's never too late
@@EricaEarth how do you know they love it? It’s stressful and exhausting. I did it! You traveled to this places and asked around? I bet they’d take any chance to live a normal life and just be young. We’re not talking about Africa. It’s America and these kids are parentified. It’s abusive.
GOD BLESS JACOB
@@EricaEarththey do NOT love this!
Minor children should NOT be saddled with this responsibility.
If we don’t nobody will. Best thing to do is be able to have help for when we become adults. They did not for me but I’m working it out unfortunately. It’s kind of weird when you don’t understand why you’re depressed until you’re an adult and realizes “oh I was dealing with a vulnerable adult”. At least the parents are nice and beautiful people. They are learning lessons about life.
@@therose5783 I agree 💯💯💯💯
Or children of the parents in general
@@buttermepancake3613I came here to say this. People shouldn’t have children with the intent that said child will be responsible for their care when they’re old/older.
Jacob was my student last school year in 8th grade and is one of the most extraordinary individuals that I have ever met. He is smart, witty, and very talented in Chorus!!! Jacob will always be one of my most favorite people!!!! I am so very proud of him!!! It is an honor to know him!!!
Liar!!!!! You don't know him!!!
People are weird why would someone lie and why would it matter to you creep @@apara2005
@@apara2005 Rude 😂
@@apara2005Stop it
If this ever true… you certainly don’t seem to mind mentioning his medical problems
May God always bless these child caregivers and keep them safe and healthy. May their sick parents also get well and live longer to see their children achieve their dreams.
Amen
ameen sumameen
ameen
Amen 🙏🏽
Thank you
This meant a lot. I’m a caregiver for a parent with dementia and I’m under 30. It’s really an act of love.
Me too. Its a hard job.. I love my mom🩷
Do you have any advice on how to give support to someone in your situation. I try my best to be supportive of my loved that will soon have to care for their family member but I don't know how. Thank you in advance
@@layla37144I’d say be there to listen and be supportive because it’s hard being a caregiver. Be the calm to the storm.
@@autumnrose6370 same here. It’s so hard and a daily struggle
@@neonpandas Thank you for the advice and your time :) May the love you give come back to you tenfold
I'm 38 now. I was an adult caregiver for my dad when I was 22 until he passed away when I was 26. He had a heart attack and while he was recovering, he had a small stroke that affected his left side. He could still speak, but he was unable to walk or use this left side, so he became housebound. I had to help him from his bed when he woke up, help him to the bathroom and help him bathe, make his food, breakfast, lunch, and dinner and also help check his blood sugar and give him insulin, he was also a type 2 diabetic. I also basically kept him company. My sister took him to doctor appoints and hospital visits while I stayed at home. I was suffering from my own mental health issues, I couldn't leave my home and had terrible panic attacks when I did, so I naturally stayed home and took care of my dad. It was exhausting. I couldn't really focus on my own mental health, and I had already missed out on my college experience at that age. I felt like I was sooooo behind on everything. I still do.
I feel you~~~ it probably was a relief when he passed. Not bc you didn’t love him but bc the care you had to give him was more than anyone can handle. I hope you come to terms with his passing and that everyday you start coming out of your shell and to start living life for yourself🩵 YOU DESERVE IT!! You deserve to have a life of your own too!
I started being a caregiver for my mom at 22, bc of her ms. I’m 27 now and I love her but I’m just so tired and feel like I’m going nowhere. No money, no education. I feel so behind. I wanna choose myself but it’s hard.
Same. I'm 38 and helped dad. My dad was older. My siblings helped. I was the patient one. I did everything I could because He was an older guy. It was my pleasure. I put my life on hold n it was ok. I'm living it up now.
I’m 26 and am going through something similar. I feel so far behind my friends and others while my own negative thoughts are affecting me as well.
Bless all of you, I hope you all get to have the experiences that you wanted out of life after helping to care for your loved ones. If you’re still doing that, hope you can find a way to get support. ❤
Shame on our government that has a huge military budget, but not a budget to help those in need via tax subsidized home health care since health insurance rarely covers expenses (also, many people who need help work or worked and paid taxes)
I'm 57 years old and take care of my mom with the help of my siblings. It's the most challenging thing I've ever done. NO a child should be in this position. It breaks my heart.
I took care of my mother: I didn’t have any help or support. No one believed me. It was unbelievable.
People are so callous. They are so disrespectful and rude.
I took care of everything. Now, I don’t have any help and/ or support. I learned a lot of painful lessons.
Some still betray like you never did it all when it’s someone else’s turn so you can get married.
@@TheLadyaec I don’t understand.
What problems did your mom had and why they never believed when you had proof
@@brandonl7110 My mother died relatively young. People didn’t believe me. They didn’t help. It doesn’t matter. It is done. I learned a lot of valuable lessons. No one cares about me. I paid for everything as far as her final expenses. I’m struggling financially as a result of it. I should’ve went on more trips.
I'm so sorry no one believed you. No one should go through this alone - especially a child.
When I became my uncle's caregiver, I was 19 years old in college, in an abusive relationship and had just fought off an eviction back in 2015. My uncle was in a nursing home and still is up to this day. We live in New York and there are too many problems with the health care system here. I found myself not being allowed to help him because I was his "niece." My cousin is also his niece and she has had a difficult time with health care professionals because she was a "niece." She is listed as his guardian and point of contact. We are constantly being dismissed almost every time we help our uncle. The system has a family tree problem. They have a problem with patients receiving support from distant relatives. We make sacrifices vouching and taking care of loved ones. Our uncle has rights and we have rights too!
Wow! You and your cousin are amazing! Keep going and I hope things will improve 🙏
These kids deserve so much. I hope they can get all they help they need too.
I applaud the kids who do this without pay. How about you pay CNAS with a livable wage so the kids don't have to care for their family.
It does not matter if you pay them a livable wage, a lot of insurance doesn't cover for a CNA, and if they do, it is for 2-3 hours(a day) a few times a week. You have to pay out of pocket for a nurse to come in to assist, reasons why it is mainly colored families going through this. They simply don't have the means to pay for a nurse out of pocket. Insurance is the problem.
pmerancier - It does matter. Medicaid is how virtually everyone receives long term care services. They need to pay people a living wage.
Ppl are not working as CNA anymore it’s not worth it if u do get a CNA they are young under 20 and not experienced and are not serious about the job but can’t blame them they are so young
@courtr1588 true you can't keep loyal employees with terrible pay
I was a CNA for 7 yrs I loved my patients, it was sad to see the only time they would get a bath was during my shift with them two days a week. Family didn’t care at all. I got married, pregnant and quit my job to be sahm best decision of my life.
Oh goodness this made me cry. This is a lot for young kids. May the good Lord watch over and bless Jacob, Rocco and all the other young caregivers.
And don’t forget to highlight how common it is for the adults to manipulate those kids, guilt trip them when they turn 18 and want to live normal lives. There is a layer of financial abuse and isolation that those kids deal with.
You are exactly right and it happened to me unfortunately. It got to the point I had to go no contact with my family. I didn’t ask to be born into a toxic and selfish family that treated me like crap as a kid and now want me to waste my best years being a caregiver because they made poor health decisions when they were younger. My childhood was traumatic and as soon as I was able to live on my own I did at the age of 19. I’m 29 now and I already made up my mind I don’t want kids because I don’t want them to feel obligated to do anything for me or burden them with my own consequences from my decisions.
My heart goes out to him. I’m 28 and I take care of my mom who has Alzheimer’s. I couldn’t imagine doing this in middle school
I'm sorry that is still awfully young for such a responsibility. Do you have any advice on how to give support to someone in your situation?
@@layla37144 have an extra support system if it’s there. Burnout and frustration are real and having others to ask for help when needed is essential. Take breaks when you can and try to be as calm and kind as possible in tough situations. It’s a major stress to take on but you got to do what you got to do. If a support system isn’t around, try agencies and help groups in your area, contact the insurance and see if there’s a way to get home help or if there is a day care system that could be there.
I am an adult and I was assisting my mom with her care. It has been 4 yrs since she's been gone and she was diagnosed with Dementia. I miss her but it was such a relief when she passed on. In order not to get burned out some days I just literally ignored her and watched her from a near to ensure she did not get herself into harm's way. You have to remember to take of yourself too. If one has never been a caregiver you have no idea. And then to put these kids in this type of burden is so unfair. Where are these women spouses?
Working? Passed away? They are single? I was a caregiver to my husband for 1.5 years as he died from cancer. I understand the burden. It was exhausting and emotionally hard. It was also the most loving thing I've ever done for another human-- other-focused rather than self-focused.
The video showed the dad with a ups uniform she has a husband people have to work in biden$ economy
The caretakers are the single ones that can’t get married bc that’s leaving the parent, not the rescued wives who’s husband can provide a nurse in place.
I was a child caregiver and it’s still having an impact on me in my 30’s, however I do wish I still had my mom.
Me too....I just started facing the impact in my 30s. Been healing but alot of work. I wish i still had my mom too.
There should be better health insurance in our nation for sick people with chronic illnesses, people shouldn't have to choose between paying out of pocket for cna's or their own young children having to learn medical care before they're teenagers. Not fair.
We had very bad luck with a care agency that was paid through my father health insurance. When I wasn’t home, he got substandard care and my things were rifled through.
Pay for those kids, like this to go to medical school,they have the compassion, patience for helping others.
Pay for their parents to have nurses so that can actually pass in school and leave home with someone else holding it down.
They may not want to work in the medical field
@@douba_plusa
For some reason a lot of people think that when you take care of family like that you automatically want to work in the medical field.
I am *100% certain* that I don't want to be a nurse or anything related to the profession after taking care of my elderly and great aunt and grandfather for 13 years.
I loved them and loved taking care of them but doing it was not easy at all. It's more than preparing meals and medications and helping them in and out of bed. The part you don't see are for example, are instances when the person/people you're caring for are uncooperative and at times extremely combative when all you are trying to do is help.
The good thing about caring for family is that you can at least plop down on a couch or maybe even climb in a bed and take a nap for a little while, or sit down on your laptop or phone and take a break or take a walk.-- *However* ,when you are in a clinical setting with patients who aren't your family you can't do that.
On the other hand, there are people out there who are caregivers for family members and would love to also do it outside of a familial setting and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that- just like there is absolutely nothing wrong with people who are caregivers for family but don't want to do it outside of that setting.
A lot of them don’t want to go into the field hence the shortage
Poor children, this definitely puts a strain on them. I was one of children, only difference is my mother was sick mentally and had an addiction. Like myself, these children, often times than not, do not themselves have the same support that a child their age would need. They will think back on their missed childhood and adolescence years and be filled with regret. They age up and become burnt out (young) adults who are tired physically and mentally, sometimes too tired to continue on to go on to do secondary education.
In longer term, this isn’t good for them mentally and emotionally. They would truly be better off with an able bodied adult whose needs are best suited to support them in a loving less stressful environment, that they deserve and need in order to thrive to their fullest potential possible.
I understand completely. I’ve been a caregiver since I was 18 in 2002. I’ve worked in different types of facilities and in home. One thing I vowed to my son, IF anything happens to me I DO not want him caring for me . That is not his responsibility. He’s a child. I will make sure I find the proper facility and care team for me. I want him to grow up and be a child and I don’t want him loosing himself. He’s only 14. I’m now 40 and assist my mom due to her diagnosis of Parkinson’s about 5 years ago and it’s progressed. My mom was like Iam glad I didn’t get this diagnosis when u and you’re brother where kids. The burden it brings. I told her I would take care of her if it did, she’s like no, that’s no place for a child.
I was actually an adult caregiver for my mom myself. Even though it was mostly my dad and me doing it, this breaks my heart to learn that youth are becoming caregivers for their parents.
These babies are all angels , they are the definition of real life angels
My brothers 17 year old girlfriend takes care of her 74 year old dad (disabled veteran) , and she feels obligated too because her mother died on Christmas Eve when she was 4 from cancer … her name is Angel because that’s exactly what she is …
God bless Angel. ❤
I've been a caretaker, maid, medic, therapist and shopper for my parents since I was about 9 years old. Mom is a diabetic that didn't take care of herself and dad has bi-polar disorder, so taking care of both while I was growing up was quite a challenge. I never went to a school dance, never went to prom, never dated, never left the house for long periods of time for fear that they would need me to do something for them.
These kids are truly wonderful caregivers however the US needs universal healthcare and affordable PSWS.
These children are literal angels, giving their parents the same love that they received. Very heartwarming!
Where are the extended family members? Genuine friends? The camps and other organizations can help, but day to day living for these young care givers is crucial. It's frustrating and infuriating how so many people simply don't take an interest in others' suffering. Thankfully, these two families are so close and loving and that's their strength in persevering. We all need to reach out compassionately, but I don't have faith the situation will improve.
Yes it is hard. I remember when my mother was sick and it was just me and her in the home. I would make sure my mother was all set with food and everything before leaving for work. Bills still had to get paid. Everytime I would come home and see an ambulance near my home I would pray that it wasn't my mom.
A mother never is a burden as he says. God will bless them all the steps on the way and beyond. For what they are doing.
Amen 🙏🏽
Oh please… They’re a burden. Shouldn’t have to take care of someone who’s supposed to be taking care of me.
But then yet a mother can get breaks from her kids, but we can’t take time for ourselves. Come on🙄
This is nothing new. God bless these children. My heart goes out to them and their parents.
Thank you! I was a child caregiver too for my dad beginning at around the ages of 7 and 8. This was back in 2002-2003 but for some reason my dad had a nervous breakdown and his diabetes had to be more closely looked at. My mom began working (which is/was good for her she wanted the job experience and i wanted her to see how much things have changed since the '80s and '90s) so with public elementary school and VA helping my dad get a right cocktail of meds it was very stressful and exhausting for me. I did all the housework, made the meals trying to make them like my mom was making them so we didn't often go out to eat or have TV dinners, laundry, keep the mobile home clean and took up sewing (that was a painful experience 😂) with my mom's sewing machine. I did everything and then some that my mom had been doing all so she could come home from work and actually get some rest and not have to bicker over something stupid with her husband. My dad wasn't always mentally there but he was getting better for the most part while i tried to keep as much stress and anxiety off of him as i could. I also tried to slowly encourage him to do some things that he could handle too which were all steps in the right direction. I don't think i was considered his caretaker anymore after I was around 13 though when he was actually getting better at least compared to before and my mom wasn't working anymore as well as his cocktail of meds working with his body.
Plan your kids and plan your care. Liberate where it’s doable.
I try not to be a burden to my children and do things for myself even when it's hard.
Some times you’re so sick you can’t
@@candygirl9923 how are they so sick they cant but weren't sick when family planning? what?
@@candygirl9923I don’t know about that. My friend’s grandmother-my friend told me this story-when she had something like 6 young kids was told she had Polio. But SHE REFUSED to acknowledge it and let it stop her from living and taking care of her kids.
So she acted like she didn’t have it. And apparently, she never let it stop her and debilitate her AND IT DIDN’T.
She had it for sure BUT for her it was mind over matter.
@@zensoundsarah9209you clearly haven’t faced chronic illness…especially when it onsets *after* you’ve had kids. 🙄
I took care of my mom who had metastatic lung cancer. I miss her she was my main priority I was 15 I’m now a young adult
Jacob & Rocco, you guys are amazing ❤
What incredible young men. They are so selfless, and yet, my heart breaks for them. I want them to be able to have a childhood.
It can be rewarding, but also extremely hard physically. I know of two sons that died one after the other while taking care of their mom. The last brother and a sister are left to take on the care of their mom. Very scary.
I was eighteen years old and my mom became sick but I took care of her. I'm a lot stronger for it. Thank you, young people for taking care of your family
God bless these children.
Hugs and Love to these children and parents. I have PPMS since my girls were 3 & 6. My husband does so much, but they fill in when he’s not around. They’re my fine motor and mini chefs. I’m so grateful for my girls. They’re 11 & 14 now.
Facing much the same with fibro. My kids are much older now but my youngest in particular has had to be very independent and has definite anxiety from seeing me struggle to function.
God bless those kids❤
This is an important story to spotlight. I hope this will lead to more advocacy and support.
I cared for my mom who was in her 80s and I was in my 50s. It was a HUGE resposibility. I CANNOT IMAGINE how these children cope emotionally. It can breed overthinking, anxiety and the need to control one's enviornment. But I pray that God blesses them with a sober mind and strength!!
I grew up with my mother being disabled. She has a left side deficit and is in a wheelchair and I have always been her caregiver
I was an adult caregiver for my Mom until she died 8 years ago(R.I.P.). It was hard at times because it was always something that kept happening to her and she was stubborn at times. I miss her
Sorry for your loss…wishing you well friend ❤
These poor kids 😭😭😭😭
Jacob you're going to be a miraculous doctor.
In tears watching this. The same system that allows this to happen is the same system that capitalizes on it under the guise of “journalism.”
I became a caregiver for my little brother in my early 20's in 2011, after he suffered a severe asthma attack that left permanently brain damaged. It's a massive responsibility. I hope these young, selfless kids get all the wonderful things they deserve in life❤
Jacooobbb babyyyyyyyyyy...thats a blessing...you will never lack.....
This was heart shattering to hear and learn the immense amount of child caregivers. I am glad that there are efforts made to support this population.
Sending love to those babies and their families. Speaking healing and acknowledgement over their lives.
I was diagnosed with early onset Lewy body dementia at 48. My son stills see a pediatrician but is my legal POA and guardian and caretaker.
My mother was diagnosed almost two years ago with Lewy Body at 67; I had recognized years back unfortunately.
I wish you the best and hope that you are able to find the best care for health management and long term care for yourself and that your son is equally assisted and finds strength and courage; all will be well😊
I did exactly that for my dad, who died in 1998. I was 15 years old when my dad was diagnosed with cancer. I changed my dads bandages, gave him his shots, and took his blood for diabetes.
I am now caring for my mom, plus trying to grow my business. Bless anyone who does it. I love my parents a lot and want to be there for them.
I was my mom’s caregiver when she was diagnosed with cancer and she had prior chronic health conditions, she recently passed away and I have no idea what to do now.
Bless your soul 😢
Maybe start with writing a list of what you would like to try? Even simple things like joining a workout session with many people (like spinning) or visiting cafes?
@@jellyrolly Thank you for your kind words and optimism. I’ve been working with my therapist and family to get through this difficult time.
I cared for my mom and dad since I was 4 years-old until they both passed away when I was 20. My mom had cancer and my dad had congestive heart failure. I never had a childhood and had to grow up incredibly quickly, and I’ve never been able to really do anything for myself. Would I go back and do it differently? Of course not. But now I’m in my early thirties with two young kids, no parents, and I have a heart condition and lupus. I feel absolutely horrible when my 5 and 6 year old try to help me because I want them to have a childhood and to be kids for as long as possible. They aren’t fully aware of my illnesses and I hope to keep it that way for a very long time.
Thank you for sharing about these 2 very mature young men!
God bless these little angels
Jakob is an angel on earth ❤️😇 He will got an reward on life for being a good human kind. Bless him 🙏🏼❤️☀️
I had to take care of my mom she was sick and it almost broke me and I’m an adult I can only imagine how hard for a child it’s not right for a child to have to do this so young the system is broken
I took care of my 3 siblings, sick mom and grandfather with cancer
May god bless these children and there parents/families in this life and the next. I am so grateful I had the opportunity to care for my mom, my grandmother's and my brother.
Sobbing.❤ I was a child caregiver from the time I was 7.5 years old to 18 years old when my mom passed. No adult family members helped or saw the problem in that. I'm still recovering from the damage it did to my body brain heart and life.
Yes, a voice for them is eminent!
I took care of my parents as a caregiver as well. It is HARD and EXHAUSTING. I didn't go to college, I choose to take care of them. But they have since passed away. My mom passed away in 2018, My dad in 2022 and I am grateful for every moment I took care of them because I would never want them to go into a rehab. They were both in rehabs for a few months and the amount of health decline in those months was insane. I remember dropping my dad off at a rehab for them to watch him while I went on vacation for a week. The person who went in, was not the same person who went home and also passed away 3 days later. I had hesitation but I was so burnt out at that time taking care of him. I would do it all over again for both of my parents and I also would NEVER send them to any kind of rehab for any amount of time. I was there when my mom passed away, right in front of me. I am grateful to have been there but I remember every moment of seeing that while yes, it looked peaceful. It is still traumatizing. Unfortunately for my dad, he passed away at the hospital and they did not call me until he was actively passing away so I did not get there in time. It makes me angry. He was my best friend and I wasn't there to hold his hand. Our medical system is a bust all around.
I'm dating a man who grew up a caregiver for his parents. He was also forced to grow up quicker but also drop out of college. Has growing up like this affected you long-term? How can you be a supportive partner?
my mom just had a stroke, now she has aphasia, i'm 19 and i was supposed to be going to college now i can't anymore. i can't even get a job & my mother's man is upset he's paying the bills but im her caregiver here with her everyday. there is so much pressure on me right now. my sister and him want me to work then they don't, they get to live their lives while i have to give it up. i love my mom & i'd do anything for her, me and my mom have always struggled together and it sucks to see her like this and i have to do all this, i wish i could live my life unfortunately the universe had other plans for me. i hate myself.
I took care of my mom up until her death from cancer 2 weeks before my 19th birthday, so I definitely resonate. For me it was an honor to take care of my mother and I took real pride in it, although I know this is not any easy job for anyone. Thank you for sharing I didn't know about Kesem and hope to be a volunteer in the future for a chapter near me.
Bless them All 💜💜💜
I’ve been a caregiver for my mom for over 15 years, IT IS NOT EASY! My heart goes out to these young men 🙏🏾😢
No child should be caring for an adult i don't care the situation. He deserves to be a kid
Teenagers, children, with a good head on their shoulders and love in their hearts for their parents who need them, not only for care giving but for the love, support and strength to continue their physical fight. Wow! God bless them and may He guide them all so these children may fulfill their wishes and goals.
Been there done that; I now understand how as children you hear my mom but as adults she becomes your mom.
I cried the entire time. Bless these kids and these families!
so sweet kids taking care of their parents is just so sweet
Taking care a love one is extremely hard and exhausting so I can’t imagine a child having to do this. It will sure take a toll of his mental health.
Bless their heart
I know how those children and teenagers feel I've been in their shoes. Now, I am 43 and still at this moment caring for my parents. I was 7 years old and my parents are refugees and I am the first generation in America. I didn't speak English. at the time ,I had to translate in Khmer to English. I respect, love and have integrity for the young ones all over the world that have these caregiving responsibilities for their elderly, young and old. ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Jacob is going to make an excellent doctor.
Amazing kids god bless them 4 life
Outstanding young people! 😊❤❤
God bless you Jacob 🙏🏼🌹🙏🏼
Bless Jacob always 🙏🏽🫂
Bless these babies!!
God bless this boy !!!!
That’s awesome, but that’s definitely too much on a child Lord please send
the angels to help with these situations
Poor boy. God bless him. That is a humongous responsibility. Great job Desantis,
Bless his heart. That is a lot for an adult, much less a child 😢
My God Bless this young man and family
I'm disabled myself and was my mom's caregiver when I was a kid even with my own we took care of each other.
When I was 13 I took care of my dad till he passed of a stroke. I’m now 19, and doing the same with my mom. I just wish I had more of a childhood, but I’m glad I got to care for them as they did for me when I needed it❤
God will bless these children in so many ways in the future!!! It is tough on them, and I know it is a huge responsibility. Your parents will always be grateful to have wonderful children willing to do above and beyond like the ones in the video. God bless everyone who is willing to take the role of a caretaker and especially if it comes out of your heart. 💙
So much love for those care givers ❤❤
its not fair, but you will never regret it. you'll always love them and they will always love you.
Bawled my eyes out. I pray there will be more programs like this.
Been caring for my parents since a small child , almost 40 years old and still doing it.
God bless you ♥
@@ramiroperez2461 Yes Ehlers Danlos Syndrome *** plus maybe 🤔 Mafan syndrome *** my new dr is contacting a geneticist to see how to get me tested . My mom nor my late father were well , especially my mom to begin with, HAVENT gotten a diagnosis yet but ALL the symptoms line up. Connective tissue disorders. An entire family affected by Very likely EDS…..my mom has had multiple hernia surgeries, a sliding hiatal hernia , can be a pain at times, OFTEN AS A CHILD I FELT I WOULD BE AN ORPHAN EARLY IN LIFE…..PARENTS IN HOSPITAL MULTIPLE TIMES AS A CHILD. FATHER HAD METABOLIC SYNDROME for years, overweight from when I was a baby , never saw my father well , he died shortly before my 20 birthday , brain cancer diagnosis to death 3 weeks. 🤯 Almost have lost my mom numerous times April 2022 high blood sugar, got under control, COVID in November 2022 , which we believe led to congestive heart failure and a pleural effusion (( on meds now )) neither of my parents cared for their health at all. Plus I have VERY LIKELY EDS ….EHLERS DANLOS SYNDROME AND MAYBE 🤔 MAFAN SYNDROME waiting to do genetic testing, but EDS lines up. I have been sickly all my life as well. An entire life almost 40 , 39 years of Drs appts. An entire family ruined by EDS. Plus extremely sick with ADDISONS DISEASE ADRENAL DYSFUNCTION.
No car , can’t drive , brain damage from multiple sources, taken transit everywhere or cabs, no rides, exhausting dragging myself everywhere. But my Faith sustains me.
Plus dealing with hypotension low blood pressure is causing part of my brain fog. 😶🌫️ from adrenal dysfunction. Starting medication.
What great kids!!! God bless them.
Thank you @TODAYshow for this featured topic !
As a 43 year old mother, I reflect on caring for my father after he retired from the Military, faced dialysis and Stage 4 bone cancer.
I thought it was normal that the family just expected it to be me & I served no complaint because that was MY DAD. But, seeing that it became the norm for many people in my family to just know I’d be the caretaker, I see me in the kids that you’ve mentioned. Thank you and please, please continue to fight to make additional programs available for kids to thrive, heal, cope & excel. 🙏🏽
God bless his little kind heart. 🙏🏾🙏🏾
God blessed these children they are angels on earth.