Top 5 Norm Macdonald's Longest jokes | 33 minutes of Norm Macdonald |
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- čas přidán 2. 10. 2020
- Top 5 Norm Macdonald's Longest jokes | Norm Macdonald Clips |
Norm Macdonal here tells his Uncle Hector, the rail hobo, joke on Conan's show. the second clip is Norm's Andy Richter joke, 3 Clip is the Norm's Macdonald riddle joke, then followed by the Albert Fish story and in the end the famous 12 minutes Joke.
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Norm lived his whole life and never killed a woman in cold blood. Rest in peace.
What do you mean Rest in peace?
"He's dead?! I didn't even know he was sick...." ~Norm
Or so the Germans would have us believe
but if we find out he did, what a punchline!
He was a better man than me that’s for damn sure
We know one thing for sure if he did ever murder a women; he would not leave her in a shallow grave.
I swear, I can tell _any_ Norm joke and leave a room full of people in dead silence.
I wouldn't boast about that. I would take that to the grave .
I do the dirty johnny one too random new people at work and the only joy is my friend I work with gets a kick out of it everytime but always blank stares
Christ, I tried one his short ones at work a while ago and got absolutely nothing. Practiced it and everything. Still bombed. Id never attempt one of his marathon jokes.
@@joelabacherli1310 that's exactly the response you should be looking for. Whenever I tell one of his jokes I tell it more for myself than anybody else. You've got to know that people usually won't end up gut laughing - but that's not the point. Good luck, my friend!
There nothing I love more than going up in front of a quiet audience and through my comedy slowly turning them into an unruly mob
My favourite detail is the miners calling Uncle Hector "Uncle Hector".
"I feel like I should be tucked into bed listening to you" Conan is completely right, that's exactly what I'm doing right now and it's great.
Lol same right now
Same
@@NostramoNoxd 😊❤ess zffhf as s❤uu
I did this many times 😅
Yup. Had to leave though for fear that my poopy attempts at stifling my laughter would wake the missus.
"Even in today's enlightened society, it remains a stigma to be a psycho-sexual sadist."
Don’t I know it
It ain't over yet!
I didn't even know you guys were sick.
His longest joke turned out to be "I didn't even know he was sick"
Well played norm
Heartbreaking, dark, and brilliant. Mr. Macdonald in a nutshell.
He'd have loved it.
The opening joke 'no, no, he's my uncle from cousin's side' went by so quickly that only a select few in the audience got it, and that really gets the dynamic going, he's such a natural talker, great stuff
You have to understand that Norm didn't GAF to the point of if he killed at a club most nights, after getting off stage he'd go back to the green room and play cards....but if he bombed, sometimes on purpose, he'd actually go to the front door and shake every person's hand as they left. For real.
If he didn’t care he wouldn’t go and shake peoples hands after he bombs
@@jacobtuttle6063bots bots bots more bots
Legend
Even without a source I believe it. Such a Norm thing to do. Hilarious.
I wish I met him!
You hear only 1 Norm joke and you think he’s one of the worst comics ever.
You hear 5 Norm jokes and like a good fungus he grows on you and you think he’s one of the best comics ever.
I saw one Norm clip before I got into him years ago and I thought it was the stupidest anti-humor ever. Then I later understood
Exactly what I was going to post!
I know what are you talking about...btw, he was not "one of the best comics ever"!
He was one of a kind!
My first Norm joke was the Courtney Thorn interview, when he said “Bored spelled B O R E D” I geeked
@@LibertarianLibrarian1776Thank you, A level of genius ne’er surpassed
"I won't say the name of the mining company, it was MacIntyre Mine"
That's how genius he was.
That’s a real and well-storied mine up in Timmins, Ontario.
LMAO reminds me of Kanye's "I'm not gonna say what kind of doctor..."
"You weren't gay,,,, you were raped" God I miss Norm sooooo much, Comic gold!!!!!
That was him making up for saying Andy loves gay porn. Like 10 times before.
The Andy Swedish German joke is one of the best jokes I've ever heard in my life not necessarily because the joke itself is so funny but the execution is unbelievable.
And, the punchline is rape and you can't not laugh.
But that is Norm in a nutshell!
He wasn’t gay
@@FrancescoRossiphoto exactly. He wasn't gay just deeply closeted.
@@joe-zj8js I’m not so sure, but my friend at the University of Science is trying to figure it out
I love how a top five norm Macdonald jokes compilation, is longer then 30 minutes.
and the Moth Joke wasn't even part of the top 5 !! 😭
@@SaulmanPhishbass reminds me of another terrible tragedy.
It’s a “Top 5 Norm MacDonald’s LONGEST jokes” compilation
That serial killer joke is the ultimate proof that Norm could make absolutely anything funny!
It was more of a factoid
@@callmeshaggy5166yeah there was no joke there… also Albert Fish was real. The other comedian was like “now I know there was no Albert fish I would have heard about it”. I doubt he killed 700 but still very real
It's infotainment!
“Do that thing that makes me feel like God.” I’ve heard it a dozen times and it still catches me off guard every time.
"You're thinking like Albert Fish now!" I'm dying
"I always tell that guy, you shouldn't curse so much" lmao excellent save Norm
I remember the moment I first heard the Albert Fish story, I was in the bathroom at my university and I was so invested in that story that by the time Norm went “this guy was a real JERK!” I bursted laughing that when I got out of the bathroom stall people were looking at me odd. Anyway, it was a nice meal.
Haha the timing is perfect haha thanks dude for tuning in I remember you from the previous video 🙏
Looked at you odd? Just like adam egrett when he doesn't complete his duty under the Queensborough bridge
That's the part that made you laugh? I die when he says "Now you're thinking like Albert Fish. Nobody cares about prostitutes".
@@TylerDurden-ch9ml that’s offensive
@@SaltBhjyeah. It's offensive to say you "die" every time when you are still in fact alive. Very deceased-phobic humor there ... shame! 🙃
Norm MacDonald saying “come on man, that’s not funny” makes me instantly laugh quite a bit more than I already was.
Norm MacDonald as Burt Reynolds on Celebrity Jeopardy is still the funniest thing I've ever seen in my life.
I have to keep stopping the video so I don't pass out from lack of oxygen.
Norm mascdonalds as turd ferguson you mean 😂😂
“Who is Andre the Giant.”
That Albert Fish guy... at least he wasn't a hypocrite.
That’s the worst part
Ya know, the more I hear about this Albert Fish guy, the less I care for him!
I love his buildup to the punchline and his French Canadian accent was very good.
RIP Norm, my dad was diagnosed with cancer 6 months ago and damn it's stressful, it pains me to say this coz he's my work partner and my best friend but the battle will end draw.
My fav Long Norm joke isnt on here....The New Neighbor whos a professor of Logic Joke 😂
Best Ever!!!
How about the midget joke!?? LOL!!
Would that be the Professor of Logic from The University of Science? 😂
@@michaelbarton9632 The one n only...
On a side note; do you own a doghouse?
Great joke, but not original. I’ve known this joke for over 35 years
Nobody got Conan to stand up and kick stuff like ol' Norm...😂😂😂😂
“The most toothsome dish in all of gastronomy” 😂
I love that Norm and Conan were so close. I also love that I can’t do any of these jokes with my friends because no ever laughs
"my uncle on my cousin's side" is so funny
Love norm - half an hour for 5 jokes.
*half a hour
@@WackityWhiz2 no
I always thought Norm made up Fish. Turns out that whole story is real except for the 700 kids. Fish killed at least 3, was a suspect in 10 others, and bragged he'd victimized children in 28 states.
Wow! 33 minutes of Norm McDonald jokes, that's like 3 jokes! 😊
Sheer tyranny of will
Andy Rickter the Swedish German joke is now legend.
I wonder if that last clip about "hope" was a silent hint saying "dont try hope, it never works out" in reference to his cancer diagnosis. You could see he dropped hints in the later stage of his cancer when he was telling jokes. I relate to him as i also have cancer in the pancreas and liver. We miss you norm ❤
How are you doing now, Jacob? You okay?
Funniest man who ever lived.
3:15 "It's coal-y" haha!
“You damn fool that’s Kitchener Leslee’s girlfriend!” Worst time to be inhaling smoke.
Coming back to videos of norm is just a nice comfortable place. Makes me happy
What a world treasure Norm was , and will continue to be !!!
Greatest talk show guest ever!!
You mean Courtney Thorne Smith
The '12 minute joke' will never get old to me. My partner's name is Janice and I cannot tell you how many times I play it for her.
No stand up has ever stolen a Norm Macdonald joke...it is impossible
Hope is what puts the sting in disappointment.
Why does Norm remind me of a Drunk uncle
As soon as norm hears the word family everything about his real life goes out the window and he's just thinks of the funniest joke That can be told about a family that doesn't exist.
It's actually quite simple but brilliant
Love Norm. I wish he could have stayed around long enough for OJ's passing.
Nailed every one.
Where's the moth joke, the university of science. Yes the Janice joke was a theme, but it just shows how his delivery and comic brilliance could make it all come together.
I'm actually quite glad that the usual suspects were missing. We've all heard the moth joke, Uncle Terry in Vietnam, the dog house, and the Youthful Porpoise a thousand times. These slightly deeper cuts were refreshing.
Miss you Norm❤😂
Not Kitchner Leslie's pig... Kitchner Leslie's LADY!
I don’t know, I was like 11, and the first time I saw Norm was on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, and Regis asked him of that was his final answer, and he goes “What do you think I’m stupid?” And I was hooked on the funniest man ever to walk this planet.
RIP.
Yeah, that's my Hero!!!
The serial killer one has me making snorting from the soul!i couldn't stop myself laughing.Dude is a legend man!
needed a five minute and fifty second norm joke today
His vancouver island trip recounting was amazing. I go back to it whenever I need a laugh.
That curse word was cut out so well that at first I didn’t understand the reaction of everyone. I thought they truly lost it at the punchline.
The first joke was just a joke about the mine. The whole setup about how his uncle got to the mine is totally not needed, and thats why its so funny.
You could literally start listening at 3:29, which is were average people wouldve started telling the joke.
You forgot not to mention the name of the MacIntyre mine
They have a law of their own … the railroad cops
I feel like that joke could have been so much better if he had briefly brought Kitchner Leslie back into the story to remind the listener that he's the antagonist (beyond just being this mythical sort of railroad cop that's mentioned in the beginning,) and if he had added a quick anecdote where someone tells Uncle Hector that Kitchner Leslie has a fat girlfriend that nobody likes. Then it could have legitimately worked when he drops the punchline as you realize she's so fat/ugly that Uncle Hector mistook her for a pig lol... But honestly the fact that it was so nonsensical and seemingly made up on the spot made it great in its own way.
I think it's also a way to get everyone invested to the point where Conan can't break off the story anymore at 'we have sex with animals here'. If the joke starts there he might have changed topics but when the joke has been going for 3 minutes you can't get away with that..
@@grizzlywhiskerthats the beauty of the joke. If you mention that kitchner leslie has a fat girlfriend the audience may deduce the punchline of the joke. The joke wouldnt be effective if you could guess what the punchline is.
I wish I could move through life with Norm's energy.
Lmfao when Norm checked to make sure Conan was still there when he took a sip
Thanks man.
For many, this is the length of a comedy special
I think the cab driver joke could work with pretty much any audience
Starts with 'Let me ask you quickly....'
Top 5 jokes: 33 minutes lmao
My god the vanished Janis is pure f ing gold!! So brilliant
I'm partial to the Scrabble story. I never saw Norm do anything outside SNL until I heard him tell that Scrabble story - on Letterman I think - and I was like, Norm is the funniest guy alive.
This man was a genius in so many ways. He worked on a different level from the rest of us. Highly skilled comedians, who are a breed of their own, couldn't keep up with Norm. The smartest of them sat back and let Norm fill the room with his words.
What, the Moth joke is not included?
I feel like the moth joke is sort of in its own league of madness lol.
Some of his jokes never ended
"Coaly"
He was superb
If you don't think Norm Macdonald is a genius then you and I will have to agree to disagree.
No I don't agree to disagree. And i'm a jewish doctor
Was he good at math or something"?
@@kainhingle4969 Better than Matthew Perry
Are you gonna bring up the holocaust every time
Are you gonna bring up the holocaust every time
Conan saying "I'm trying to help you out" to Norm is like your classmate who failed algebra saying "I'm trying to help you out" to Stephen Hawking
"You werent gay. You were RAPED!" lmao! Man i miss Norm.
Every grandparent wishes to be as glorious as this man
Rest in peace
Turns out there really was a "gray man" named Albert Fish the Werewolf of Wysteria
The good thing about Norm, after it was revealed he murdered all those women and buried them in very very deep graves,, was he wasn’t a hypocrite.
Conan helping with a joke is like a gardener tromping on sprouts shouting”grow faster!”
Never met a professional stand up who wrote Street Jokes...there was only One.
Janice is the funniest goddamn bit any comedian has ever written.
The light was on 😂
Damn, I was waiting for the moth joke !
My favorite!
I discoevered norm too late , the man is legend 😂😂😂😂 rip norm he was all about the laugh
Half-a-hour
A Swedish-German is a Danish nightmare.
You forgot the Moth joke 😎
"well, i have shorter ones but..."
genius
All I want to know is, WTF happened to Janice????
Half a hour news is right.
Perfect commercial timing thnx
Ole Blue eyes, I miss you buddy. But you died and I didn't so there is that ♥️🙏♥️🙏
That last joke, oh my gosh. He is so missed.
Poor Janice
That Albert Fish stuff wasn't made up. It wasn't even a joke. It's true.
I actually wrote a book on Albert Fish. Norm got most of the information correct. He would brag to his acquaintances about having victims in every state, sometimes even in great…he actually was a real jerk
Wouldn't the riddle be the cab driver's son?
5 jokes make a 32 minute video 😂
15:35 this has to be one the funniest 30 seconds ever recorded 😂
Don’t laugh this next part 😅
@@T25dethat’s the worst part of the story😂
Now don't laugh at this next part
Here is the difference between hobos, tramps and bums
A hobo is someone that travels and works. A tramp is someone that travels but doesn’t work. While a bum doesn’t work or travel.