Is Your Ex Dropping Hints For You

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  • čas přidán 5. 09. 2024
  • Clay Andrews answers, "Is Your Ex Dropping Hints For You?"
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    Does it ever feel like your ex still has feelings for you? Does it ever feel like they are trying to reach out to your even get back together with you but you're not sure because they are not saying anything about it? Are you wondering if this is your chance to get your ex back?
    In this video, Clay Andrews shares some things that you can watch to know if your ex is dropping hints for you and maybe signs your ex wants you back. He also shares some insights on how you can react to when they actually are dropping hints for you!
    **** IMPORTANT ****
    This is an internet video, and it should be obvious, but this video and other videos on this channel should not be taken as a substitute for the evaluation of a psychologist, therapist, counselor, etc. This video and other videos on this channel are intended for informational uses only, and only reflect the personal opinions of the creator. The creator of this video is not responsible for your actions or choices or the consequences of your actions or choices.

Komentáře • 65

  • @JoshJones-rc7ru
    @JoshJones-rc7ru Před 2 lety +14

    She cleaned her house today and told me it looked empty
    I asked her what's missing
    Her answer was people. I said oh
    Then she said it was missing 4 people.
    Meaning me and my 3 kids❤

  • @drama2u
    @drama2u Před 3 lety +13

    My ex is prideful. I wish he would say, “I was wrong, let’s get back together.” Most of the times, he wants me to start a conversation after a fight.

    • @christinagior42
      @christinagior42 Před 2 lety

      Same here.. he’s starting to reply to my messages

  • @cwigg7728
    @cwigg7728 Před rokem +8

    She’s giving me so many hints I don’t know where to begin…selfies of herself, reminiscing about good times, bringing up intimate times we shared, reaching out when she’s depressed, reaching out to share happy news. We were together for 3 yrs, and we have a great connection, but circumstances in my life w my children and my ex wife drove an emotional block between us. Our relationship was actually wonderful beyond all that. Simply being friends isn’t an option, far too much passion for that. Thank you for stating that we don’t push enough to find out boundaries. At this point, I don’t know what those boundaries would be, as she’s pretty much saying w her actions “I’m back in the game”…I just have to confirm this, rather than analyze. The analyzing phase needs to end and the truth about what she wants has to come forward.

  • @sallysorbello7303
    @sallysorbello7303 Před 3 lety +5

    I love that you are saying we are not pushing enough! I am gently pushing for authenticity and no games, and have been very clear about how expressing thoughts and emotions honestly should feel safe for both of us. He seems extremely threatened by genuine communication. Your advice is so helpful and affirming.

  • @therealyou5824
    @therealyou5824 Před 3 lety +12

    I sincerely appreciate your advice, Clay. You really are helping me grow and develop myself. Thanks, man!

    • @ClayAndrews
      @ClayAndrews  Před 3 lety +2

      Happy to help, Mia. :-)

    • @therealyou5824
      @therealyou5824 Před 3 lety +1

      @@ClayAndrews I just thought to myself, I'd love a video about how to deal with feelings of resentment when your ex doesn't seem to be taking responsibility for their part in the relationship failure. My ex and I are now connecting very well, although it's mostly me reaching out with all these amazing revelations and growth points, I think because he's scared and more timid and passive than me, cause he's very responsive and warm to me now. we're at a place now that's soooo much better thanks to all your advice. But... I do have this feeling that he's not emotionally available... Like, he tries, hard, and he can do plenty of the right things. But... I just haven't seen him understand his part. I really do feel I have taken it all on my shoulders. But I love him, so should I make that sacrifice and just fully own my part, and hope time will reveal his heart to me with more positive interactions? Even though he has apologised here and there for some things, I suppose I'm waiting for some "big reveal". He says he's changed a lot, but I dunno, he's acting too "cool" right now, and that's annoying me. I just need to know what I should or shouldn't expect in this process. It kinda makes me want to cut off completely, so he can "see what he's missing" or taking for granted, like other coaches say... But I don't know. Please do help with this one, I'll love ya for it!

  • @GinoPietermaai1999
    @GinoPietermaai1999 Před 3 lety +1

    Letting go is the solution to everything.

  • @gemmahoang1162
    @gemmahoang1162 Před 3 lety +4

    Well for us its nearly been 2 years cause I have getting myself ready to get my best self n confident again .
    We do agree we both had faults in the relationship. But he didn't expect me to hurt him which what I did almost costed him his jobs .
    And hes enjoying n happy being close friends again .

    • @OkJess0404
      @OkJess0404 Před 3 lety +1

      @@gemmahoang1162 this mr nicely (and others like it) is a bot who literally only wants your info and money. As in SPAM!! Don’t fall for anyone online that types messages like this. Be online smart and keep moving forward.

  • @amyjohnson5044
    @amyjohnson5044 Před 3 lety +2

    My ex mentioned something about me using one of my sick days at work when I know I will want to use them later because last year (when we were together) I wanted them for when we went camping... I know it’s not a super hint but he was telling me to save them. I visited him last night and I was greeted with a hug, eventually a kiss and yeah. Goodnight was a tight hug and said to text when I got home. It really is about the connection and not the relationship! Our connection seems so much stronger now and we’re not even dating. Evening texts and calls and hang out mostly on the weekends. Patience is key. If you want your ex back you need patience and know there will be lots of pull backs!

    • @ClayAndrews
      @ClayAndrews  Před 3 lety +2

      Sounds like a progress you have there, Amy :-)

  • @Bucky1836
    @Bucky1836 Před 3 lety +7

    If they had the strenght to dump u. They got the strenght to commuicate to you, hints are for immaturd children

    • @St-Abbed
      @St-Abbed Před 3 lety +1

      True! Mine dropped hints every 2-3 days on social media. It was about feeling depressed and desparate, then happy and moving, then back to sadness on and off for a month. I never reacted or reached out. I shouldn't ve checked but I wasnt looking at her stuff for like 3 weeks and then when I finally did it was all there. (checked after she broke the silence & vanished again)

  • @cadanflix
    @cadanflix Před 3 lety +3

    Even after so long, I think she’s dropping hints

  • @lisaofthelodge
    @lisaofthelodge Před 3 lety +7

    Excellent content Clay, it's really given me food for thought. Super grateful for this topic, thank you 🙏

  • @Giovanni-01
    @Giovanni-01 Před 3 lety +2

    I agree with the 7:05, she did reach out in November, it was in an indirect-direct way. Miss call from her at some weird time on a Saturday, I waited to see if she would leave a msg (no msg) so I asked if she called on Monday, she said it was an "accident". So we spoke briefly, over a couple day's,and then nothing more from her since then.

  • @welovee1680
    @welovee1680 Před 3 lety +1

    One I can totally relate to with my ex. Thank you Clay!! ♥️♥️♥️

  • @mst5113
    @mst5113 Před 3 lety

    Out of no where he says ;
    I don’t liked to be lied to.
    Out of no where he says:
    Jealousy is gonna be our down fall.
    Out of no where he says:
    I’m not chasing women I’m getting my money but someone doesn’t understand that.
    I’m thinking 🤔
    What are you saying?
    What does he mean?

  • @blueishmary
    @blueishmary Před 3 lety +2

    Great vid! Tbh we went back to surface-level communication cause we had some disagreement some time ago and I still feel hurt

    • @benhartart9487
      @benhartart9487 Před 3 lety +2

      try and let it go the feeling of hurt and go with a clean slate but communicate what was said that made you feel hurt feelings, maybe he said something but meant another thing and you represented a different way to what they actually meant, come to any interaction with non judgement and kindness, and you will handle things better

    • @blueishmary
      @blueishmary Před 3 lety

      @@benhartart9487 Hey thank you! I am trying actually. I told her I was hurt, at some point I love to talk but there are times I still feel the hurt.

  • @samlee5698
    @samlee5698 Před 3 lety +1

    I broke up with my ex back in march of last year, and I have been struggling to move on because I truly believe I made a mistake. Well it just so happens beginning of January she reached out to me because she was in the hospital and had issues with her diabetes and also a bad blood infection. She told me about how her relationship she got in right after ours in May failed because they always fought because he was not doing things I would do for her. She said he also cheated on her she was sure of it at the time. So she and I started to talk and then we even agreed to take things slow and not committ right away to make sure we could get along and have a better relationship the second time around.
    She then hung out with me twice, and I slept over we did not have sex or kiss even but we did cuddle. Then the following week midway too she began being short with me and cold, and I found out that her ex who blew her off while she was in the hospital was trying to get back together with her. This of course upset me because she had told me she and him were actually discussing getting back together. So I kind of lashed out at her accusing her of lying and using me. She then became more distant and let me know that they officially got back together but she still wanted to be friends. This dude has a criminal record for assualting women that I tried to show her and she would not take it.
    So after this I started watching videos online and stopped lashing out. I tried being nice to her, and being her friend, but every so often I would throw a flirty line in here and there, and at first she was being receptive of it, I even asked her if she loved her new dude she said she thinks she does but it is different than how she felt for me. but then later on when I said another flirty thing she told me that it was inappropriate for friends to talk like that. I do not know what to do now?

    • @osvaldoruiz3826
      @osvaldoruiz3826 Před 2 lety

      Run

    • @speed0383
      @speed0383 Před rokem

      Come on man. Get some self respect and never speak to her again. Don’t be a friend or a crying shoulder

  • @manishachandran563
    @manishachandran563 Před 3 lety +1

    When we start to gently feel out the edges of where your ex feels uncomfortable by pushing through those boundaries and if they directly say if they feel uncomfortable talking frequently and wants to talk once in a while(like once in 3 months), how to proceed from there after knowing their boundaries where we are not comfortable with this timeline?

  • @St-Abbed
    @St-Abbed Před 3 lety +2

    well-deserved sub! GOOD LUCK!

    • @ClayAndrews
      @ClayAndrews  Před 3 lety +1

      Thank you. :-)

    • @St-Abbed
      @St-Abbed Před 3 lety +2

      @@ClayAndrews Actually, thank YOU for the awesome videos and all the help with the breakup and moving on. Owe it to ya🙏

  • @cbshin9483
    @cbshin9483 Před 3 lety +1

    Thank you for your kind advice. It really gives me hope.

  • @crystalwestfalls2314
    @crystalwestfalls2314 Před 3 lety +2

    Thank you so much for all of your videos! They really helped me so much !

    • @ClayAndrews
      @ClayAndrews  Před 3 lety +1

      You are so welcome! We are so happy that we have helped you. :-)

  • @Lee-dv5pe
    @Lee-dv5pe Před 3 lety +1

    My ex reached out to me 5 days ago and told me about a dream she had of us? So confusing, is this a hint? I'm remaining in no contact for now, I need space from these mind games.

  • @Lance.Valle1
    @Lance.Valle1 Před 3 lety

    Currently on no contact. I am ignoring any hints if there were any.

  • @mikey5848
    @mikey5848 Před rokem

    All my ex did was hint. Only time she was straight forward with me was when I did something "wrong." I would have to read between the lines for things she wanted. This could also just be women in general though , Lol.

  • @DIYDomTheBuilder
    @DIYDomTheBuilder Před 3 lety

    Question: Regarding what you said about feeling your way around a dark room… If you bump into one of their boundaries, aside from not pushing back against their resistance, how should you phrase your verbal response, to not only demonstrate that you respect their boundaries/comfort level, but also prevent taking too many steps back?
    Case in Point: My Ex & I still live together (for logistical reasons), but over the past 2+ months since our “break up”, I’ve been actively working on improving myself and repairing what was lost/broken between us. During this time, as our emotional connection has been improving (quite dramatically in fact), we’ve taken a few baby steps forward in a more romantic connection as well…. Sleeping in the same bed, to positive feedback regarding the efforts & improvements I’ve been making, then she was cool with (and has enjoyed) me giving foot/back/head massages again, a few days ago she even said she’d be cool with cuddling while watching tv in bed. Then the other night I hit a boundary… As we were cuddling & giving her a head massage, I kinda got lost in the moment & let my hands explore…things. I went slowly, testing the water, and thought she was cool with it. Little did I know, she had fallen asleep 🤦🏻‍♂️… She woke up (to use the bathroom) & was a lil startled with what I was doing and said “No no no, I can’t.” I stopped immediately & apologized. She was polite about it n even let me resume massaging her scalp (to help her back to sleep). My concern is that, I hope I didn’t set myself back a few steps or anything. At the time, I just didn’t know how to respond or what to say, so she wouldn’t feel awkward about having said “No.”, thus possibly preferring to not have me give her anymore massages etc. for the time being.
    Got any suggestions?

  • @matiasdvoskin3985
    @matiasdvoskin3985 Před 2 lety

    Yes to stay away from her

  • @JessieTheGinger
    @JessieTheGinger Před 2 lety +1

    Hey clay, I think my ex is dropping hints that he may be ready to get back into a relationship soon. We hangout every week and He has been more affectionate lately (example: being close to me, leaning into me when he laughs, touching/cleaning my face in some way, doing things to get his face close to mine, hugging, flirting/dirty jokes, sharing a bed). He's been opening up to me bit by bit, he still has trouble telling me how he feels though. ive told him recently that I'm ready for a more serious and intimate relationship but if he's not ready then we can take things slow. He said he would think about it and we haven't talked about it since. What do you think would be a good push in the right direction to test the boundaries if he is almost feeling ready to be more intimate??

  • @TheCassandraMitchell
    @TheCassandraMitchell Před 2 měsíci

    I’ve been in NC with my ex for almost 2 years and he sent me a friend request on Facebook the other day and has been watching my stories, could that be a hint? He is very prideful btw.

  • @kimdurant-rev.3112
    @kimdurant-rev.3112 Před 3 lety +1

    What KINDS of hints?

  • @drama2u
    @drama2u Před 3 lety

    Here’s the thing. He was contacting me once a week after our breakup. I gave in after a month and we saw each other twice briefly until the third time, we hung out in his room. He was dropping a lot of hints for me to stay overnight. We had a very good intimate night and that was it. He stopped contacting me unless I send him a text then he would text me back. I don’t know what to think of this especially he’s moving away to another state in one week.

    • @drama2u
      @drama2u Před 3 lety

      @helene de wit thank you for your thoughts..I totally agree.. I’m glad he’s moving away, so that I can move on too

    • @drama2u
      @drama2u Před 3 lety

      @kyara ksf their loss..I got no time to babysit

  • @user-nh6cy3rh7q
    @user-nh6cy3rh7q Před 3 lety +1

    What does it mean when an ex says they are uncomfortable around you, even if you guys a deep certified connection, after the breakup and doesn’t want to meet, what do I to talk about to them, they say they don’t even want to see me nor start a conversation, and they want me out of there life but giving mixed signals.

    • @ClayAndrews
      @ClayAndrews  Před 3 lety +3

      Sounds like your ex is at the Wall of reactance phase.

    • @user-nh6cy3rh7q
      @user-nh6cy3rh7q Před 3 lety

      @@ClayAndrews yes she was! And I had to realize my past behavior which made her act like that, that view she was holding on to was affecting her healing of wanting to see me again. But now after giving her space we are good now.

  • @rebeccajohnson5658
    @rebeccajohnson5658 Před 3 lety

    One ex is giving hints as a ghoster in my conversations to others. This ex is afraid of confrontations with others. This ex hates drama and being in competition with others. This ex is shy and nervous at times. This ex acts hot and cold, has love and hate. And this ex has been coming back to me off and on for years. What are these hints mean to me about him? He seems afraid and confused?

    • @ClayAndrews
      @ClayAndrews  Před 3 lety +2

      Have you talked to him personally regarding the said matter? Effective communication is the best approach to understand where he is coming from.

    • @rebeccajohnson5658
      @rebeccajohnson5658 Před 3 lety +1

      @@ClayAndrews yes I was reaching out to him as often as I could and asked him how he feels. It seems as if he has hate and love feelings for me. I think he is confused and afraid to tell me exactly how he feels and hides the truth from me by telling lies.

  • @starfaith721
    @starfaith721 Před 3 lety

    Clay... Please help😭 what if my ex is talking to me nicely... Like saying ill hold your hand while you get nightmares (virtually) but before saying all that.. He said i don't want to be in a relationship EVER. should i have hope ..is it possible to get him back? He still loves and cares for me i know... And he said that too... But is too hurt...idk what to do anymore😭

  • @tanneraydelotte5009
    @tanneraydelotte5009 Před 3 lety

    She keeps on turning off and back on her snapmap it’s weird. What does this mean ?

  • @anjab676
    @anjab676 Před 3 lety

    He broke up with me 2 months ago and said he "might want want to try again" "maybe" in the future. Yesterday he postet a story with a meme of a guy drinking wine with a bunch of cats and it read "where I see myself in 10 years". Do you think that this was a hint for me? Do you think, that was his answer? Or did he even think about it at all? Or did he just want to check if I would watch the story at all?

  • @elaineswanson8578
    @elaineswanson8578 Před 3 lety

    My ex is very stubborn he has me completely in the friend zone we are going to hang out Saturday and I don’t know what’s gonna happen if anyone has any advice let me know I do have the tendency to bring up the relationship which I hear is not a good idea because then I come home crying that we don’t hang out very often maybe once a month I am trying to get him to hang out more I just don’t wanna be too pushy about it

    • @ClayAndrews
      @ClayAndrews  Před 3 lety +1

      If you ever we perceive the person as ”too stubborn ” -that reflects more about where your level of emotional acceptance is (or lack of) and that you’re struggling with Empathy, Acceptance and the Advanced Relational Skills. How you respond/react to things is a reflection on where YOU are at in your 5 individual stages.

    • @omaralvarez3564
      @omaralvarez3564 Před 3 lety

      Trust me im bot clay but i have wisdom on Saturday play it cool 😎 like try to see him as hood friend of urs act like u dont care in other words dont show ur emotions dont bring the pass negative.,,after do no contact for 2 days unless he text u first

    • @omaralvarez3564
      @omaralvarez3564 Před 3 lety

      Not ***^

  • @barbersmurff2592
    @barbersmurff2592 Před 3 lety

    My ex told me she misses me and we hugged last week and she even said she missed how I felt. She calls me a few times a week but pretends that it’s our kids that’s wanting to call me. She’s even told me she was sorry and that she has regrets about how everything ended but I’m in a dark room bed she’s in a rebound relationship sooooooooooo yeah that’s that I guess

  • @GhostRecon3211
    @GhostRecon3211 Před 3 lety +1

    the only hints she dropped was that she only wanted to be friends but my stupid ass tried to get back together and got needy in the process while she didn't give much of a f***

    • @ClayAndrews
      @ClayAndrews  Před 3 lety +1

      I'm sorry to hear about what happened. If you are to turn things around, what do you think is the best way to approach the situation?

    • @GhostRecon3211
      @GhostRecon3211 Před 3 lety

      @@ClayAndrews @Clay Andrews honestly I just think it's never going to happen, no matter how much I'm going to try, I'd like to believe something will change, but I've seen her act hot and cold a lot, but I messed up by acting needy and stressing her, when she wanted to focus on university, and she wasn't 100% honest with me about things. Right now I'm not talking to her, we live in different cities and university is closed right now, we talked about being just friends, but it was just a lie cause she thought I still wanted to try, and she couldn't stop thinking about that