Why Marriage Is NOT a Contract (It’s a Covenant)
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- čas přidán 7. 02. 2023
- For the past 50 years the institution of marriage has been under attack. More and more couples are choosing not to get married with the mindset that, "we don't need a piece of paper to show that we love each other."
And yet, that is not at all what the Catholic Church teaches about this sacrament. Today, Fr. Mike delves into the difference between a contract between two persons and the covenant of marriage that every couple is called to enter into.
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This needs to be talked about more I think people would take their marriage more seriously!
most people do take marriage seriously, but I do believe there are times when one or both parties has a right to leave the marriage: abuse, neglect, or infidelity are often times great reasons for someone to leave an unhealthy marriage. there is study after study that tells us about the effects of abuse, neglect, violence, and infidelity have on a couple and that effects the children. sometimes, an annulment or a divorce is necessary for the well being of all parties.
Yes. The best married couples I know not only put God first, but they literally took their marriage as a covenant between them and God.
@@tonywiley5771disagree. Why marry that person if you can’t take them at their worse. I’m serious, yes all of what you spoke on are bad BUT that should cross your mind before marrying. If you’re not willing to take someone at their worst then don’t marry them. Simple.
33 years and going strong!!! I couldn’t ask for a better marriage. It doesn’t mean that we haven’t had our ups and downs, or that life hasn’t thrown tough stuff at us, but it does mean we only grew stronger. ❤
God bless you both ❤️🙏
Wow! That's great. I must confess that as a 39 year old man I have never seen a happy marriage in my life! Half of my family is Catholic and half us Nazarene. It doesn't seem to matter what Church you are part of. I almost think that it is more luck of tge draw than anything.
I sometimes think that marriage is less a gift from God, but more of a curse to punish us. I truly think God wants people to be unhappy in this life. I think that the more miserable you are in this life, the more God will bless you in the next life.
I am a very happily married women of 42 years. What a joyous, wonderful covenant it can be. But it takes work, support and time to develop a fabulous relationship. Marriage is just the start. The covenant and the paper matters.
@@Alexander44665 I feel so bad for you! Marriage is a Sacrament, like Baptism. It is a gift from God. If you are faithful He will lead you to the right person.
Make sure you are going in the same direction, want the same things, and are both committed to marriage. My husband came from a marrying family. Marriage meant forever. That helps too: being committed to your vows, not just loving the person.
A Hollywood actress was married to a man who cheated on her constantly. Friends asked her why she didn't divorce him, as she had every reason to. She said, "I didn't just take my vows to him; I took my vows to GOD." I was blown away. I respected her so much. Sometimes I want to choke my husband of 32 years, but the good times are SO GOOD. Not always easy, but worth the work, the forgiveness, the patience, that is essential to a good marriage.
Remember: you don't know what goes on in someone else's marriage. Your family may be much happier in their marriages than you know. You can't judge. Pay no attention to complaints. Everyone has to vent sometimes when their spouse is driving them nuts! Doesn't mean they aren't happy. Marriage is not a lifetime of unending bliss. That cannot be sustained. Respect, admiration, caring, compassion, and forgiveness are all things you have to practice to keep a good marriage happy.
@@knitwit7082 as regards the Hollywood star one does not have to stay with an abusive or serially unfaithful spouse to keep vows. If a person chooses to leave such a spouse for their and their children's peace if mind or protection the person is still faithful if
Holy sacrament Holy Matrmony 🙏🕊 40 years on & going strong!❤✝️
Thank you Father Mike🙏
God bless your marriage ❤
Holy Moly 😮 Congrats!!!That is incredible! I am turning 42 in a few weeks and I can’t believe that I’ve put up with myself for that long little own someone else haha. I’m just kidding. Your blessings are a great inspiration for many. Especially me 💗 Thank you for sharing!
45 last August
Thank you for another great video, Fr. Mike!! I love how you stressed FOREVER and not until death. My husband died unexpectedly last summer. I am in my early 50s, When we were married 31 years ago, I promised to love and honor him all the days of MY life. Marrying him was a risk, and sadly he was called home earlier than expected. I will spend the rest of my earthly life as a widow. Our covenant bond still has a purpose. We are still helping each other get to heaven. I pray for him many times a day, offer up my chastity and loneliness for him, and offer frequent communions and masses for him. I know he is praying for me as well. Not even death can break our covenant bond.
Catholic marriage is "until death do we part" and you are free to marry again after the death of your spouse. Of course, you don't HAVE to! That's a given. But you are definitely allowed. Catholic marriage is NOT "forever."
@@SilverCottage You're right that a Catholic can remarry after the death of a spouse, but there are two versions of the marriage vows. My husband and I chose the "All the days of my life" version that the above commenter mentioned.
This was a great video. My fiancé and I are planning on meeting with our priest next week to go over the church’s sacrament of matrimony. I am catholic, my fiancé is not. Is there anything he should know or we should know before going into this meeting?
The bond may be forever, but the "marriage" literally ends at death. There will be no married couples in the resurrection, as Jesus said.
I'm not Catholic but what a beautiful statement. God Bless.
My wife and I celebrated our 25th this summer! Fr. Mike is a blessing in our time!
Happy 25th anniversary! My wife and I will likewise celebrate our 25th this year.
I had to divorce mine due to abuse. I'm waiting for my annulment that has to go to the Vatican before I can take tthe sacraments. It wasn't a sacramental marriage, and I have no plans to remarry. I hope I can be forgiven 🙏
Praying for you I feel you 🙏
@Leaf My priest and the diocese said its a petrine annulment and can take up to a year and a half
@@leaf4958 I forgot to mention im a convert in the RCIA so I hope that helps
@@leaf4958 That is my understanding as well. You only need an annulment to remarry. The Church does not recognize divorce.
@@tiff1622 If you're not yet a Catholic, I'm not sure divorce would be an impediment to joining the Church and receiving the sacraments.
I was just listening to day 38 in the Bible in a year and u were discussing contracts vs covenants and then your new video popped up… sooo I’m paying attention 😊
♥️✝️🩸
1 Peter 3 KJV
18 For Christ also hath once suffered for sins, the just for the unjust, that he might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh, but quickened by the Spirit:
2 Peter 2 KJV
1 But there were false prophets also among the people, even as there shall be false teachers among you, who privily shall bring in damnable heresies, even denying the Lord that bought them, and bring upon themselves swift destruction.
Acts 20 KJV
28 Take heed therefore unto yourselves, and to all the flock, over the which the Holy Ghost hath made you overseers, to feed the church of God, which he hath purchased with his own blood.
1 Peter 1 KJV
19 But with the precious blood of Christ, as of a lamb without blemish and without spot:
Colossians 1 KJV
14 In whom we have redemption through his blood, even the forgiveness of sins:
Romans 3 KJV
25 Whom God hath set forth to be a propitiation through faith in his blood, to declare his righteousness for the remission of sins that are past, through the forbearance of God;
Ephesians 1 KJV
7 In whom we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of his grace;
♥️know♥️
1 John 5 KJV
13 These things have I written unto you that believe on the name of the Son of God; that ye may know that ye have eternal life, and that ye may believe on the name of the Son of God.
Went to mass today. It was a celebration of marriage day and about three dozen married couples reaffirmed their vows. I live in a small town in Northern Maine, it was JUST GREAT!
Our parish does that also. So nice!
On the flip side…if it’s just a “piece of paper”…what stops people stopping playing house if it’s so insignificant? There is No discernment & people’s sad relationships shows this. We are not told how intensely serious this choice is. What a travesty. Viva HOLY Matrimony! 📿🙏🏽✝️🕊😇✌🏽❤️🔥🕯💒⛪️🦨
Correct....there's the idea, and then there's reality
You are right, however let's disagree to agree. First point is you do not need a paper to show or prove that you love someone. The marriage certificate is a legal statement and officially social recognition of your union, but again, the marriage is the acceptance of the other by choice regardless A B C D criteria, this is called unconditional LOVE. And in the Catholic and a normal Christian faith, marriage has been established (institutionalized) by God Himself, so by principal it is a convenent not a contract. First marriage is the one of Adam and Eva (Book of Genesis), there wasn't any certificate or any sort of condition. Marriage is a gift to Humanity. This is why I still find it hard to desacralize marriage as we can now see in the modern society where marriage is being materialized and perverted.
@@c-bastyanaka8231 I’ll say it again for those who need the extra help…Marriage is a very serious endevour & most of us pick foolishly & treat poorly. It is not something to be taken lightly but most do. When you let God in your heart & see his way & he shows you your true self…one picks more wisely. Left to our own understanding…we pick so foolishly & what seems like a perfect & desirous match is anything but. Humbling to the marrow. The End.
Skunky, I am so with you. Even if you only live like you are brother/sister for awhile, there's discernment for awhile. A lot of discernment is really important.
"On the flip side…if it’s just a “piece of paper”…what stops people stopping playing house if it’s so insignificant?"
Nothing. That's why marriage is declining and polling has found that a significant number of people under the age of 30 have never had a serious relationship.
Father Mike you are a wise and funny priest. I hope you read this Father Mike thanks to you i am closer to God more than ever, one day that i felt broken, heartbroken and alone i found your videos, and i know it was God that made me found you. You are a blessing of God Father Mike. Thank you for everything ❤
Fr. Mike is a blessing and you blessed us with this lovely statement ❤
So beautiful to watch, my relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, Really love her so much, i can’t stop thinking about her. I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life but to no avail, I’m frustrated because i literally can't envision my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her.
your feelings are understandable, It's always difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation when my wife of 12 years left me, i couldn't just let her go. I did all I could to get her back, I had to seek the help of a spiritual adviser who helped me bring her back.
@@bartholetbay412 Wow, how did you get a spiritual adviser, and how do i reach her?
@@Margart526 her name is MONICA ERLENE MORA, and she is a great spiritual adviser as well as a caster and healer
@@bartholetbay412 Thank you for this valuable information, I just looked her up online. impressive.
@Margart Bochner how did you know the spiritual adviser was a girl?
We have been working on our marriage going on 63 years and each day we work to make it possible to have the best relationship with each other. Praying the rosary together each night is helpful along with apologize for any wrongs occurring.
Got separated/ divorced a couple of months ago.
Forgive me lord, I did my best to save my marriage and failed !!!
42 years and still going strong. We learn something together everyday. God bless you Father Mike.
My husband and I have been together for 17 years , but only got married this January. It was only after our twins were born that we fully became catholics, and althought I'm extremely grateful for God's patience and mercy towards us, I can't help being a little sad over the fact we took so long to honor Him with our lives.
Thank you, fr. Mike for your amazing work, and thank God for your life. 💛
I've always appreciated Fr. Mike's marriage videos, and this one is probably my favorite.
👑♥️ easiest Crown to receive in the Bible.
2 Timothy 4 KJV
8 Henceforth there is laid up for me a crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, shall give me at that day: and not to me only, but unto all them also that love his appearing.
1 Peter 3 KJV
18 For Christ also hath once suffered for sins, the just for the unjust, that he might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh, but quickened by the Spirit:
1 Peter 1 KJV
19 But with the precious blood of Christ, as of a lamb without blemish and without spot:
Colossians 1 KJV
14 In whom we have redemption through his blood, even the forgiveness of sins:
Ephesians 1 KJV
7 In whom we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of his grace;
♥️know♥️
1 John 5 KJV
13 These things have I written unto you that believe on the name of the Son of God; that ye may know that ye have eternal life, and that ye may believe on the name of the Son of God.
I cannot even explain the incredible timing of this video right now. Marriage isn’t something we define. It was defined by the trinitarian God who exists in a perfect unity of love for all eternity. Thank you, Lord, for your enduring covenant, and help us to imitate that through our own marriages.
Marriage is contractual with terms.
Marriage already existed for thousands of years before this god was even invented
@@TamponesBand is yours an infallible statement?
No. It is defined as a LEGAL CONTRACT. That is what marriage IS to distinguish it from other relationships. You can have a fancy Catholic wedding, but if you don't have the license from the office of records or city hall-the CONTRACT, which is what marriage IS-you are NOT married. You are shacked up with none of the bennies that go along with marriage.
Exactly correct. It has always been secular. Religion glommed onto it much later than its origins of 5,000 years ago.
This video explains how serious marriage is. It's something we really need to think about before settling down. DON'T RUSH IT!
True story!
The seriousness of marriage would be correct grammar
How exactly does marriage "settle" a person? It is such an insult to imply that single people are somehow unstable and "unsettled" unless they sign a piece of paper and go through some sham ceremony.
Beautiful discussion, Father Mike. Thank you. ✝️ ✝️ ✝️
Hello everyone please help me be in prayer to be accepted for disability tomorrow 🙏🏼 I’m not able to do things on my own and can not work at all, I’ve suffered with many chronic pain because of my illness since i was 15 and now I’m 23 i pray the judge can see that i am in need🙏🏼
@@suzymoon2067 i was accepted 😊🙏🏼 not long after this comment
4:05 “A covenant is an exchange of persons with no condition.”
“The love of God and the love of man are not two loves but two aspects of the same unifying love.” ~St. Maximus the Confessor
Oh my gosh…..! This is soooo good! This needs to be broadcast to America and the rest of the world! People need to hear this! 💖
After this morning’s Gospel reading (Matthew 5:17-37), I was glad to see this thumbnail reappear in my feed. On the drive to Mass, I was speculating with my wife as to whether our priest would read the abridged version, omitting verses 29-32, where Jesus specifically references illicit so-called remarriage. Thankfully, he read the entire passage, but I realize that there are a lot of irregular relationships these days (sadly, sometimes even in our parishes) and that some people might find it uncomfortable to have these relationships called to attention. I think the contract many people going into marriage have in mind is probably something like “I agree to stay with this person as long as s/he makes me happy.” I have many friends and relatives for whom it’s now too late, and I find it incredibly difficult to convince them to join the one true faith when they feel “my” God is unloving for being unwilling to forgive them a silly mistake from their youth and allow them to start over. My heart truly goes out to them. Ave Maria
Simple but beautiful explanation about our sacrament, thank you.
Sadly, I've been married twice, divorced twice & annulled twice, sure wish I had of heard this before marriage!!!😮Ps. I wasn't Catholic at the time of either marriage.
God bless all vocations!!!🙏🙏🙏
I know what you are talking about 👍
Thank you Father for sharing with us blessings from Salem Oregon
The different videos I’ve seen from priests in CZcams, they seem to have an inner peace that is just different. They speak with a joy and a calmness that left you thinking.
Jesus took a risk on all of mankind ✝️ and made a new covenant possible that can’t be broken!
Thank goodness He did! 🥰 What an example of pure love for us to follow!
Yes, so grateful! Thank you Lord Jesus for your sacrifice for us!
Faithfulness through all circumstances is truly a rare and beautiful quality that we require the help of the Lord to do right
Good stuff. Had never heard the distinction between a contract and a covenant before. Thank you.
Marriage is a solemn contract aka covenant.
I’m so glad you watched this. More people need to understand the difference.
I think this is one of my favorite videos in the internet. Father Mike is a blessing.
I heard a Baptist preacher talk about this very thing over 40 years ago. This is the first time I can recall ever hearing a priest say this. Bravissimo, Fr. Mike, as always! 👏👏👏
Yup. My wife and I are one. I certainly think if our marriage was based on a contract it certainly would not have lasted. A marriage is not a contract!
Oh Father Mike, I hope you could officiate my wedding, but I live outside the US. Thanks for sharing this profound message. Take care everyone!
God bless you and your upcoming marriage!
Really great video. More people need to see this.
Very very good explanation Father after 36 years here I'm day by day
It’s crazy cause I just got married on Sunday and the next two videos from ascension presents is about how every women is made to be a mother and then this one about marriage not being a contract 😂 God works in many ways for sure
Congratulations 🍾🎊🎉🎈 so happy for you!
Well said Fr...100 percent correct👍
We need more of this, more explanation of the sacraments and of all our Faith. People aren’t being taught.
Perfect Fthr. Mike- I will send this to my niece who is getting married in October!!!
Thank you Father..excellent presentation
Thank you so much Fr. Mike...Your words have Power!!
I cry watching this, thank you.
Great way to explain it, as a covenant. It is not a contract, not a business agreement.
God bless you, Father Mike💕🙏📿
Thank you for making this video! My sister always says this that it is just a piece of paper.
Really enjoyed this ❤️
Marriage is the only Sacrament where Gods grace flows through the couple and the priest / church are witnesses; however, if there is an impediment in either couple that blocks this Grace, the Sacrament did not occur and our Church can declare annulo after investigating the couples actions during courtship and on the marriage day. So many Catholics do not understand this. So many divorced Catholics don’t realize that dating or remarrying without going through the annulment process is adultery as our Church always defends the marriage bond as valid. That is why, if divorced, it’s always important to either A. Go through the annulment process. Or B. Live as a chaste, separated married person. Annulments are not automatic.
Correct! Finally, someone who gets it!
What a beautiful message ❤
Thank you Fr.Mike ..
We know Love because He first loves us, His people, His beloved chosen
I love that God gave us the covenant from the very beginning: In today's first reading from Genesis: That is why a man leaves his father and mother and clings to his wife,
and the two of them become one flesh.❤
Beautiful! 💐
I’m not married, nor plan on getting married. My vocation is singleness. I however, do have a few of acquaintances who are in unhappy marriages. If sharing is caring then I will be sharing this with them.
@@suzymoon2067 Amen, wish you blessings my dear!
I'm not Catholic and I'm divorced not dating anyone. I'm divorced from a man I was married to for twenty years. And he is a christian, firmly believed in no divorce. Yet we got divorced he married the love of his life his highschool sweetheart and she has been divorced more than twice. Father Mike I'm sorry I laughed out loud when I found out what he did in comparison what he talked about biblically. Lol. I respect what you're saying father Mike. But also from my perspective having been through my experience going through that and then seeing my ex being completely hypocritical it changes my perspective about some things. Get what I'm saying. Much respect father Mike. You take care. And God bless.
Thank you for your explanation, Father! I think the distinction between covenant and contract is exactly what's so hard to understand about catholic marriage.
A marriage ceremony doesn't have to be performed in a church to be a legal marriage. However, the CONTRACT or license MUST exist for a marriage to exist; otherwise, you are shacked up. Marriage has always been a secular concept, not a religious one.
So true Father. I wish you had been as clear as this to Megan Kelly when you were on her show .
Just saying that if your spouse cheats. They break that covenant according to Jesus ❤
Well, I used to think this too, but no, according to JESUS, HE didn't like it at all. He said it was allowed because of the hardness of our hearts. Just because Im not the one that did not take part in the physical adultery let's say, that doesn't get me a free pass to walk. For the sake of blanket statements here, in the case I described, let's say my wife truly is a Believer as I in Jesus, then she's also my sister in Christ. So per God's Holiness, He still looks at us as 1, not 2. Would it be hard to reconcile; you bet, yet it's the entirety of scripture we must look at us we claim to be growing in our faith. Just because on this case, the wife committed the act, I would be hard pressed to stand before Jesus to give Him a sinless account of my role in the marriage. God wants reconciliation and forgiveness. After all, don't we want God to forgive us much?
Thank you Father Mike for bringing great peace around the fullness of Marriage in a world that has generated so much of fear on it 🤍
We're were married for 53 years before the love of my life died, after fighting cancer for 18 months. I sure hope and pray this covenent continues in Heaven.
When I made my vows in ‘76 it was forever I then put up with him cheating on me and abuse for the next 26 years I did get a divorce and I’ve been remarried for 22 years to the most loving man who Adopted my children and also became a Catholic if our ex spouses die before us we will be free to have a Catholic blessing which would be wonderful. I’m doing the Bible in a year with you and the catechism in a year and am really enjoying it thank you
Great words
Thanks!
Can u please do a video on courtship. I would like to learn more about it thanks!
Have been married for 29 years next month and am in the process of joining the Catholic faith. The problem is that my wife was married and divorced before i met her . Had absolutely no clue that my one and only marriage to her made me an adulterer. The Church is working with me and i have been attending the RCIA meetings and have been to Mass twice.
(Not partaking in the sacraments) I truly believe Jesus pointed me to the Catholic faith so I have put all of this in his hands. Ignorance is not bliss in this case.
Father Mike is so adorable!
Can you do a follow up video on annulment?
Fr Ripperger refers to marriage as a contract. But he did not mean a piece of paper. He uses the term because both the husband and wife should observe justice in their marriage in terms of how God intended it for marriage.
Beautiful, Father Mike.
I have an observation: There are several things in common between a contract and a covenant. Perhaps the most important of these is the decision to commit to the other person for the mutual good. In my opinion, those who do not want to sign a paper when getting married (according to natural law), do not recognize the relevance of society for that purpose, or do not have the firm intention of staying together for life. Lacking these, what does the distinction between pact and contract matter?
Thank you for talking about this. I feel like I’m the only one who gets this idea. My parents do not understand this at all. Actually, my whole side of the family doesn’t get it at all. I’m married now, and I love my husband, I’ve accepted his family as mine. But my family won’t view him as family. It’s made me see how the devil has a hold on my side so much. I’m happy God delivered me from that. It’s not love, it’s not what Jesus has in mind for us. And it bothers me sometimes but the last time it bothered me, a little voice popped up in my head and said to me, “listen to your Father who is in heaven instead of your parents who are only but flesh.” Boom. I try to remember that often now.
"Marriage isn't a contract it's a covenant." Amen.
@Mikeschmitz5 oh cool pray that scammers stop commenting on my comments.
Fr. Mike, could you do a video on whether it is ok for cultural celebrations to be held during mass? Recently at my parish, they celebrated the Chinese New Year festival during mass whereby the congregation bowed to honour their ancestors. There were Mandarin oranges and even joss sticks. Most traditional Catholics oppose these sort of cultural mass but I read that Vatican 2 permits it. What's your take on this? Thanks and God bless.🙏🙏
I don’t know if he’s ever been complemented on it
Father mike Schmitz has a nice voice.
Greetings Father Mike,
Thoughts :-
- Message reflects with Distinctive Insights on "Physical Commitment" and "Spiritual Attachment" in 'HolyMarriage'.
- 'Chauvinism' and 'Feminism' is Toxic in Every aspects.
- Thanks for Valuable Insights on 'Sacrament of Matrimony'.
With Prayers,
RanjithJoseph (R.J)
Going on 50 yrs this july
It’s a solemn vow. You say your vows to your new partner to become ONE for the sake of a family to begin.
Amen 🙏
I was married in 02', married in the church 13', divorced in 22'.
I took my vows and the Covenant of Marriage very seriously. I've chosen to not break the Covenant Marriage I made to make myself "available."
I've had a similar situation. Married in '99, blessed in '10 and divorced in '21. I'm currently seeking an annulment and must say it's been a healing process. God bless you on your journey.
Exactly 💯❤💕
It's both. Fr. Ripperger also has a video on this. It's not a null and void contract so to speak but as spouses have certain "rights"
It's a solemn contract. If NFP is licit, spouses have zero rights bc NFP makes secondary ends primary.
Yaaaaaay!!!!
Is the covenant marriage really worth keeping if staying in it causes you to sin? Causes you to be miserable? When the other person has resented your faith from b the beginning and lied about it? Has made disparaging remarks against it? When the other person asks you to prioritize them over following what your faith tells you to do? This covenant made before God that one cannot break is an offense to God if broken yet keeping it breaks your relationship with God, what then is the step in the right direction? When one is a believer, the other a non-believer?
Amen
Amen! Why Marriage Is NOT a Contract (It’s a Covenant) is because people often conflate Plutocracy WITH Meritocracy. These are not the same thing.
The Real Problem is the Breakdown in Marriage: Have you seen the rise in Annulments from 1968 compared to today within the Catholic Church? The rise in Annulments was a tsunami of Annulments: In 1968, the American church granted fewer than 600 annulments; today in 1998 it hands out more than 60,000 a year - From less than 600 to more 60,000 in 40 Years!
I got divorced pretty young after getting married pretty young and it is deeply difficult. I really wish I had marriage counseling BEFORE getting married and subsequently divorced. It's the single worst thing I've ever experienced and can't figure out how to get passed it spiritually.
Sorry for this vocab is very specific and English isn't my first language, but I'll try my best to make it clear, even if through the wrong formal terms lol.
If you were young and imature it's very probable that it's a case of anullment. Catholic marriage is only valid when both parts agree competely on human will to take the vows. Some examples of what could be annuled:
- shotgun wedding (through external pressure, because of unexpected pregnancy or because you didn't want to upset/let yours or their family down, fear of lonelyness, emotional imaturity). Anything that makes your "yes" at the altar not sincere fits into making the vow fail to be of a true human will, because it's not coming from your inner will, but from some form of external pressure. No need to be a literal shotgun lol.
- not knowing beforehand something really substantial. When only after the marriage one discovers something about the other that, had they known beforehand, woud deeply affect wether they would decide to marry or not. For example: someone lies/hides a serious vice, or an intent not to have kids. If, for instance, I have a boyfriend that agrees with me to have kids just for me to be ok with him but never seriously wanted to, then we marry and I find out he doesn't want them, we're on anullment grounds, for had I known beforehand I wouldn't have said "yes".
- Basically anything that makes your "yes" not to come from both Reason and Will together can make your vows invalid. The most charicatural case would be a drunk wedding in Vegas, but even the burst of passion can be impairing if you don't take enough time do discern properly.
If I were you I would reach out for a priest that understands about Canonic Law or can direct you to some guidance, and seek for the anullment if plausible (it seems to be the case) so you can have peace in your soul, an renew your journey to Heaven :D
God bless!
A contract generally doesn't mean that if one party doesn't do what they're supposed to do, the other side also doesn't have to do what they're supposed to do. A contract obligates both sides to fulfill what they agreed to and either side can take legal action to force the other comply or pay damages if they don't.
Right but that’s the point: a covenant doesn’t work that way. That’s Fr’s whole point. Everything in a contract is CONDITIONAL. A covenant is NOT conditional. I got married in the Church, and they drove this point through to the end. You have to always bring your best, your 100%, not your 50%, to the marriage, even if the other person is not able to or willing to. ***there are exceptions to that rule***but just because there are exceptions doesn’t make the rule invalid.
@@ntmn8444 I understand the distinction he's making is conditional vs unconditional commitment, but those are not real legal properties of a contract vs a covenant. A contract is not optional once both parties agree. Legally speaking, a covenant is something included in a contract and not a separate type of agreement. I'm not disagreeing with unconditional vs conditional commitment in a marriage, I agree it's best approached as a permanent/unconditional agreement, but the analogy he's making stems from a misunderstand of what a contract is and what a covenant is.
Bottom Line: I don’t stay for the government’s legal paper. It’s God’s law that makes me work at my marriage
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My husband and I entered into our covenant almost 13 years ago. Unfortunately, he has reverted to the pre-Vatican understanding of the marriage vows, specifically with regards to the marriage debt. So, in essence, if I dont uphold my end of the contract, then he is not.bound to hold up his.
I lived with my boyfriend for 6 years before we were married. We had the verbal agreement that we would get married in the event of a pregnancy. We have been together for 36 years
To anyone who is reading is pray that I'll be with my soul mate forever. And we will be connected in mind, body, heart and soul ♥️
Father! You should definitely talk about PRENUBS! is it wrong or not in a marriage!
Where does annulment fall into this? I know of people who married through the church, had children, then somehow get an annulment in order to remarry....
Marriage is beautiful but comes with a life of sacrifice and loyalty
That peace of paper makes it harder for someone to leave
I get it now, Fr. Schmitt!! A Marriage covenant is like an indefinite life consolidation of multiple entities into one entity. No strings/conditions attached. Is that right?
Serious question - if we have a covenant with God, and covenants can't be broken by bad behavior, then how do we sever our relationship with God by sinning?
That ending caught me off guard cause I always assumed Jack and Jill were siblings 😂 but I googled it and apparently they aren’t!
I marriage is a contract (i.e. of adhesion), but it is irrevocable. The breaking of the contract CAN - given a Church proceeding - result in a separation (i.e. from bed and board), but the marriage still exists. A (the?) goal of a separation is the reconciliation of the two parties.
What when one breaks the Oath ? The other is still bound to it. In fact, both - it seems to me - are still bound to it and sometimes conduct their affairs as if they were not. Where does God come into this dilemma ?