Seeking justice in maternity care mistreatment
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- čas přidán 25. 08. 2024
- ABC News' Devin Dwyer reports on the mistreatment some women are experiencing in hospital maternity care wards and the advocates speaking out in search of solutions.
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#Pregnancy #Mistreatment #MaternityCare #ABCNLPrime
In my experience it not only happens in delivery rooms but also pregnancy care in general. The lack of empathy for a pregnant mother is shocking.
A family member developed gestational diabetes and had the triad of symptoms: increased hunger, increased thirst, increased urination. She told the doctor who didn't even let her finish one sentence. My family member said she was thirsty all the time, the doctor interrupted and said she should drink Gatorade instead of water for better hydration. My family member continued: "but wait I'm also hungry all the time" and the doctor scoffed and said: "just because you have a baby doesn't mean you can eat double." Took months before her diabetes was diagnosed
I'm sure it happens in all types of healthcare - unnecessary procedures and prescriptions are an epidemic in the hospital business
Yes! I am currently pregnant and they don't listen. It's been eye opening and can only expect the worst during my labor and delivery process.
@@gabrielacortez4893 if healthy and have help, deliver at home. Go to doc only if needed post delivery care
A health worker who is not a therapist… is just a health worker.
I had my son 38 years ago. It's exhausting to even go into the horror of his birth. He was healthy, and I survived, which is all I can say about it. The doctor was terrible. I was so traumatized by the horrible experience that I vowed never to get pregnant again. I was torn all the way back..all the way. I had hundreds of stitches, and I was awake and could feel it all. I had so many stitches it took 2 years before the scar tissue softened up and the ache I could feel, especially during my period, stopped. I still say to this day I would have been better off squatting in my back yard to give birth then letting that doctor anywhere near me.
So sorry you had to go through that all. You would think people working in the medical field would have compassion for others, I guess not!
We have to be grateful for women in the OBGYN field. End to end episiotomies are not as frequent, along with stitching you up without lidocaine. These stories are scary!! I had my child the same time as you.
My mother had a difficult time with my younger brother. She said the same thing. Never again.
@@aileenquiroz4453 p
Oh ya..I didn't add I had a tubal ligation right after the birth of my child for a miriad of reasons. The brutality of that child birthing was definitely on that list!!
I identify so much with this woman's story. Nurse put Pitocin in my IV while I was sleeping against my consent when I very fervently said I DID NOT want Pitocin, wouldn't allow me to get up to move, got a blood infection because they wouldn't check my IV or allow me to take it out or change it. So many issues after my delivery. Made many complaints to the hospital, no replies, no apologies, no changes. So incredibly upset. Where is the accountability?! When did birth become so medicalized and so incredibly unnatural. It's infuriating!
💯
I would have sued. I’m sorry you went through this.
If only suing wouldn’t cost thousands to get Justice. This is so inhumane and I’m sorry you experienced that. You deserved better 😢
WOMEN. NOT “birthing persons.” 🙄
I am so very grateful to these women. Because they spoke up, I was aware of this phenomenon when I became pregnant just a few years ago. I went with a well researched midwife, and had a wonderful homebirth. If it hadn't been for these brave women's warnings, I would have never thought of that option.
People like to think that hospitals are a place of healing, but thats not always the case. Its the place of stadardization, thats for sure.
Not so long ago, but more than a bit, the doctors didnt know to wash their hands. This killed ALOT of women. One doctor figured out to wash their hands. The deaths dropped dramatically. The other doctors got him kicked out for insulting their practice. The deaths went back up. Women used to justifiably beg not to give birth at the hospital.
To this day, its still just humans in there.
I’m right there with you 💯
Welcome to kkkristian Amerikkka
@@SpayAndNeuterChristiansNow The people who are doing this to those women aren't Christian on any spectrum, they are agents of evil, here to do the devil's work. By looking at your name, I can only assume you're a victim of religious abuse. I hope you're able to recover from it, rather than harboring such personal views on all Christians, because not all are pretenders or false teachers. I was agnostic up until two years ago, but that's my personal journey and it's not important to you and I really don't want to over share or possibly give you fuel to say something rude just out of spite. I'm not going to apologize on those individuals behalf what may have happened to you, but I hope you'll just know God isn't the enemy, Baal is.
I had two beautiful pain free (used Hypnobabies) home births! It was the best experience ever! I wish all women would experience wonderful birthings.
We need more female nurses to become midwives and more doulas.
I got mistreated but one of my nurses post birth. She thought it would be a good idea to yell at me. My husband walked in and witnessed it, she immediately changed her attitude like she knew she got caught. We made a formal complaint to her supervisor and she was put elsewhere after that, but it still really messed me up for a long time. She did it when I was most vulnerable. I don't understand why people like that go into nursing. I understand anypne can have a bad day, but those assumptions and accusations made my child's early life really hard for all involved.
I was yelled at and coerced into accepting an unwanted epidural that caused damage to a nerve resulting in months of back pain and spasms. I was also given pitocin without my consent. While my story is not nearly as bad as some, it left me emotionally scared and contributed to postpartum anxiety. I chose a midwife assisted homebirth for my second child and the difference was night and day. I felt respected, heard, and in charge of my birth. The American obstetric system needs a drastic overhaul.
I've heard that most postpartum depressions comes from a traumatized, hospital birth. I have yet to hear from a mom that had a tranquil homebirth who got postpartum depression.
@@Mint-kj9kwI had two successful home births, one easier and less painful than the other by far because my first was sunny side and took foreverrrr. I had/have postpartum depression and anxiety with both, and my second birth especially I wouldn't consider traumatic by far. However I have a history of major chronic depression and was anorexic most of my young life so my postpartum body in particular was a big and bitter pill to swallow.
My midwife is a kind and experienced lady with 7 of her own children. She's been a midwife for more than 25 years and has assisted in delivering hundreds if not thousands of babies. She was instrumental in supporting me throughout my pregnancies and postpartum and still checks in at 6 months postpartum. I don't know what I'd have done without this woman, she's truly an amazing woman and I'm blessed to have her as a guide through my motherhood journey. I know for a fact I wouldn't get this kind of care and empathy from a traditional obgyn. The difference between my miscarriage care (between live births) with my midwife and the visit I had with the ER plus the traditional doctor was night and day difference. My midwife will answer a call and talk me down while it's 3 in the morning and I'm having a panic attack. The ER basically told me (after ignoring me for several hours) "Sorry your baby is dead but we're busy and need the room so if you could hurry up and get out; expect to have a miscarriage within 48 hours."
Completely traumatizing and reaffirmed my decision to do home births.
While it’s extremely sad that this is happening to so many women I have to say I’m glad I’m not alone. I went to the hospital to be induced and was progressing well until the nurse came in later on and shut my pitocin off which stalled my progression. She did this because she had a bet with other nurses that another mother would give birth first … all for a Starbucks gift card. (My husband overheard the nurses talking about it and my Dr mentioned the pitocin was shut off when she was trying to figure out why my progression stopped. I didn’t have my daughter until almost 3am and was overly exhausted which ruined our experience and almost ended up in a c-section because of the length of time. Luckily my daughter and I left the hospital happy and healthy but I pray everyday that this nurse never does that again as it could literally kill someone.
She should have her license revoked. At the very least, a formal complaint with the hospital.❤
What the heck! That is horrifying
Did you make a formal complaint?
I was present at my niece's healthy, uncomplicated vaginal birth in the hospital and it was horrific. I wouldn't even say she was mistreated; it was just a harsh process with what seemed like an endless array of people looking and touching. There was no empathy or gentleness from the staff. They wanted it done and done fast. And then they put her in a room with her baby and basically just left her alone. She needed a lactation consultant and never got one or even any help with latching from nurses so, of course, she ended up using formula. Then these hospitals have the nerve to charge the mother 10s of thousands of $$. You couldn't pay me enough to give birth in a hospital.
Yes. They also lie like crazy in the hospital notes. They had a list of times at which I, supposedly, breastfed the baby that were completely invented. My hospital notes are an astonishing exercise in creative writing. An unbelievable black comedy. I was instructed to start a mechanical induction through coached pushing (in real birth there is no pushing, NONE) at station 0 before my pelvic floor hiatus was dilated. I do not recommend lacerating your pelvic floor, this is an abomination. Or lacerating anything. I sustained so many lacerations it is unbelievable, including lacerating my cervix in half on one side.
It has nothing to do with disrespect. They are just evil and want something for nothing. Doing your job properly has nothing to do with respecting or disrespecting the customer. Shoddy job for easy self-benefit. In fact, my midwife (she should be called medwife) demanded money from me months before the delivery with the threat that otherwise she would not come to the delivery. The irony is that with what I know now I would have paid her NOT to come to the delivery. Her presence was unnecessary and completely detrimental. I was sold worthless garbage. Sad all around.
I never got to see a lactation consultant and the nurses and Dr also ignored my elevating BP post birth. I was there 5 days complaining and had to go to the ER less than 24 hrs after discharge. It was ridiculous
That's crazy, I've had both hospital and home births and was treated well in both settings. Lots of lactation support, I got to move around and push in many positions despite my epidural, and they insisted I hold the baby for an hour immediately after birth. I felt good about it overall, although to your point I was a little rushed, but for good reason. My water was broken and they didn't want to risk infection, so I had pitocin.
The same thing happened to me. The nurses left me alone with my baby and i never had any lactation specialist for consult. i felt ashamed and embarrassed. My son ended up on formula as well. and i get upset when ppl ask me if i breast fed my son because it makes me feel like i failed
I told the nurses the moment I was admitted I am a sexual assault survivor and I have PTSD. They acted like I belonged in an insane asylum and injected me with medication for schizophrenia to tranquilize me so they could touch my body however they pleased. It was like being assaulted all over again only this time women in scrubs and medical masks were doing it to me. There is no autonomy for us, we are just incubators for the baby to be removed from. I will never have another child.
My Story: I was coerced, threatened and manipulated by the on call doctor and nurse when I was in labor with my first. I was not allowed to move a muscle even though I was unmedicated in labor and it was for no medical reason the one nurse literally guarded me. Which if you have been unmedicated having contractions you know that is insanely painful to not be able to switch positions. She yelled at me and my husband because I went to the bathroom for less that 1 minute and literally screamed that I needed to get out of the bathroom and back on the bed. I told the DR I didn’t want my water broken if there wasn’t medical cause for it and she said their wasn’t but I was going too slow and it had been a long night for her and she needed to get home sometime so she just needs to speed me up a smidge and I declined again. So she asked to at least do a cervix check to see where I was at which I said OK. She reached up my vagina and said yeah I’m just going to break your waters while I’m up here you’ll feel a little gush and didn’t even let me answer, I was shocked, the terrible nurse I had came and told me as I was in the middle of puking (she didn’t even wait for me to stop which seems like common decency) that the doctor wanted some med students to watch my birth and I declined because I’m very private and guess what the students came and watched my birth ANYWAY after I declined. Totally unethical.
A half hour after the DR broke my water she said I wasn’t progressing fast enough and she was doing a cesarean. I begged her not to if there wasn’t a reason but she said she was going to anyway. She took my husband away and told him that my life and the babies were in danger so that’s why she had to do a cesarean which got him on board because he was worried for me. On the way back to the OR the nurses were chattering away while I was bawling as if I wasn’t there and one said “where is Dr Brown?” “She’s just finishing up that other girls cesarean so she can come do this girl quick and then her shift is over and Dr so and so is taking over”
So basically she coerced me into a cesarean so she could get the paycheck and get off work???
My records say that I consented to everything they did which is a total lie and documented my cesarean as not medically necessary.
Also the doctor who said I wasn’t progressing “fast enough” I was in the hospital for 3 hours total and in that time went from 2cm to 8cm which is pretty darn fast. So lie after lie and coercion. I was severely depressed postpartum for 2 years.
I will say there was 1 nurse who was an Angel and I had her for about 30 minutes after the nurse from hell him got off work. Also this hospital documented my babies date of birth WRONG. So on his Birth Certificate it says he was born on the 13th when in fact he was born on the 12th 🙄
I had my next baby with a lovely nurse midwife and it was so peaceful and beautiful.
The US has terrible healthcare.
That's horrible. I'm so sorry you went through all that. That's a nightmare.
I had very similar circumstances, and the notes were written that I consented to them breaking my water (which I did not) and that I declined to labor in the birth pool for pain relief (which they said couldn't be used), I even have the video of the birth pool deflated in the other half of the room and I can be heard saying "that is the pool they said we can't use." My baby was in OP presentation, which is so painful, and them breaking my water, made my labor so intense...Many of the notes were fabrications, to prevent liability.
They gave my son a circumcision without my permission. I was a 17 year old mom
I’m so sorry. One mama with traumatic birth to another - I’m sorry. There are MORE of us than not. Maybe this news story will help gain this issue more attention. It’s a big problem. Even if baby is physically healthy, a mother coping with PPD and PTSD could have lasting emotional/bonding (or even worse) issues. This topic definitely needs more attention.
Sounds awful.. Unfortunately, multiple countries won't even admit you for your birthing without the money up front, so tragic as all of these stories are the United States does have better health care than the majority of the rest of the world
I have a similar story to share during both my deliveries. I too was subject to physical restrain where I was strapped to my back and I was trying to deliver the baby against the pull of gravity. I felt totally betrayed. The second time my baby was in distress and the nurse did nothing. The doctor just happened to make a round and was shocked to see what was going on. I saw his face turned red and the look he gave the nurse said it all. He delivered the baby immediately using a forcep and the placenta along with a big gush of blood just fell to the floor as it was already detached from the uterus.
Yes, standing up is the proper way to give birth bc gravity is helping you. Having women lay down for birth makes no sense, it’s almost like they’re making women suffer for their enjoyment or make them stay longer to get paid more. Either way it’s disgusting, ancient Egypt had better healthcare than we do.
What state was this in?
And when a woman argue, about the way she is treated they say "DO YOU KNOW MORE ABOUT CHILDBIRTH, THAN DOCTOR WHO DO IT"? As if woman does not know her own body
Pregnant people? Only women get pregnant so the word people is ridiculous in that statement.
I worked in a teaching hospital and I remember seeing 3 medical students waiting for their turn to examine a woman's cervix, so they could get practice. She didn't speak English and was probably just grateful to receive free care, but it could have also been traumatic for her. It was just gross, since it was obvious they were taking advantage of her. When I had my first baby, the medical student stuck his hand in me without even addressing me after the resident explained what he needed to do. He didn't even make eye contact with me. My doctor asked the nurse for an amnio hook when she was examining my cervix before starting that induction. She didn't even ask me if I wanted my water broken. A lot of trauma could be avoided by treating your patient like an adult, one who needs and wants information about their body and gets to give consent for procedures.
They go for the money . Not because they care about people. But hey that’s what they all care about the paycheck.
The US is still letting students perform non-consensual pelvic exams on women undergoing anesthesia and surgery for entirely unrelated procedures.
hospitals are for abortions, the home is for birth.
Pure evil. Those that allow this need to be jailed for life without parole@@kpstl26
This is unrelated but I had a student present for a skin check at the derm and she didn't greet me at all either, you'd think they teach you basic respect to the patient and that if you're trying to become a doctor you understand that the patient isn't a piece of meat for you to study...
My mom was a nurse who said she refused to work in maternity wards after a few years. She said it made her sick how women were treated like cattle. The casual cruelty and expectation of pain, the complete lack of patient bodily autonomy etc. was too much for her to bare. She said doctors didn't care about informed consent, or consent at all. She said doctors would pre-emptively start cutting women to "make things faster", not because it was needed for the safety of the mother or child. All without asking/telling the woman before hand. To pre-emptively do it before these cuts were even remotely indicated, without numbing them! That and the fact that the "husband stitch" is still happening is GROSS. The CONSTANT stabbing, and prodding of the cervix is also unnecessary but they still do it despite it being invasive and painful.
Can you image if a doctor just decided to slice a man's scrotum open without anesthetics, or even asking just to make their job easier and faster?
Instead of seeing birth as a painful, and sometimes traumatizing experience that should NOT be made anymore painful or traumatic than it already is, the fact of it being painful and traumatic is used as a carte blanche to inflict as much pain and trauma as they want because women should just accept that's how birth is.
It's nasty.
Thank you
Yep a lot of doctors DELIBERATELY inflict more pain on women in labour
You’re absolutely correct. They would never let men suffer like this.
The husband stitch is not necessary because after about 9 to 11 months after delivery of a baby, the vaginal canal goes back to its original size.
I'm a nurse and it's not just pregnant women, all patients in healthcare are treated like cattle! The whole system is so broken 😢
I have fibromyalgia. When I gave birth my pain levels were so high I screamed because I coudlnt keep it in and was scolded and told to shut up. That was the best treatment i got because in the end I lost my baby. No one deserves to be treated like crap.
25 years ago when I was giving birth, I can still remember screaming in pain while a midwife refused to take her hand out of me. She yelled at me for struggling (I was in A LOT of pain) and said, "Let me know when you want help" and left me. Thankfully my parents were there and my father went to the hospital administrator. Other things happened too and I just stifled it down because I figured it was just a part of the hell that is childbirth
I spent over twenty years as a labor and delivery nurse and I can attest I have seen this horrific behavior over and over and over. I have witnessed countless births that were rough and downright abusive. Ob/gyns feel entitled to have authority over women’s bodies in the name of “safety”. There are doctors out there yelling at women, performing routine episiotomies, and being rough with women’s most personal body parts because of irritation with the patient or in the name of “fetal distress” which they either perceived or caused themselves. Everything is rushed so they can get the baby out and breathe a sigh of relief. This happens at the most renowned, well known, advanced, and respected women’s hospitals. It is standard and accepted. Nurses report the same doctors over and over and nothing is done other than a slap on the wrist. Doctors get away with it because, wait for it….they bring in the money.
Not everyone or hospital is like this. I had the best treatment and Nurses when I delivered at a young age. It made me decide to get into Nursing. Now I work in L& D and patients and family members return and thank the team.
@@FirstnameLastnamesTrust me not-for-profit is the exact same. It's all about the dollar regardless. Tell me how nonprofit hospitals have groups of CEO's making double-digit millions each?
I tried to leave a google review for my bad experience during birth of my child and it just disappears.
So I'm curious, did you notice a difference in treatment for privately insured vs Medicaid/ State insurance/non insured patients?
I had great insurance through my then husband's work with first baby , 15 yrs later I chose not to ever marry again and was blessed to have my second,. I was able to get on the state Medicaid program since I was unmarried, actually forced to replacing my regular covg thru marketplace, anywho, my hospital experience was night and day different.
It felt shitty. I have to say I'm grateful that the worst experience happened when I was older and more assertive and thick skinned, but I thought of all the young new Moms going through this, who maybe don't have much of a support system, it's heartbreaking to imagine. I felt very abandoned by staff, ignored and a burden to them.
So disgusting and unacceptable
Women’s pain is always diminished in our society
I thought it was just me. My first experience was my baby's heartrate was in the red- low. No one cared, no one came. My parent's are doctors and finally my mother said, I want the doctor. When I gave birth, I was mocked for not pushing hard enough. I pushed for 3 hours asking for help. When my son came out, the cord was wrapped around his neck twice. I had been asking for vacuum suction for 2 hours, finally when the doctor saw the cord, she used it. I am just grateful that he was okay. After my second son was born, I was hemorrhaging afterwards. I kept asking if it was normal and was told yes. Finally, I went to the ER and had to have a D&C because there was still part of the placenta left. Both were bad experiences and I have insurance and had what I thought was good medical care.
Pregnant people? Birthing persons? I hate it here 🙄 We’re women. Plain and simple.
What also needs a major change during labor is allowing women to choose in which position they would like to deliver. Delivering while laying on your back is actually more painful and hospitals prefer this method because it’s more convenient for the nurses and doctors.
Not only is it more painful, its harder to deliver.
The fact that we word it as "allowing women" shows the mindset we have all been trained. Doctors are supposed to be assisting us, not dictating to us
Yes!! I wish I had spoken up about how I naturally felt like delivering. I ended up having my tailbone fractured during delivery and my baby was only 6 1/2 lbs. I had a great doctor and was delivering without any pain intervention by choice so the hospital sent the nurse in who was also a midwife. Even with the best of circumstances I didn’t feel okay asking to change back to the position I labored in leaning against the back of the bed. It is unnatural to deliver against gravity for convenience.
When I first arrived at the hospital, my contractions weren’t very strong BUT something was pinching a nerve in my back that felt like I was being stabbed with a hot electric knife! Trying to explain what was happening only resulted in the nurse YELLING at me to “toughen up”. My husband had to advocate for me and eventually I received a localized morphine shot that completely took care of it while still allowing me to push. However, despite the smooth labor from this point on, I was forced to be on my back. Every fiber of my body was telling me I needed to be more upright in a sitting position. My repeated requests to have the bed raised were completely ignored by everyone in the room and I wonder if this had anything to do with the large tear I endured. For 25 years I’ve been thinking it was my fault for not being “more assertive” in expressing my needs. WOW. Even after hours of labor I never cussed at anyone, I was a “good girl”- but now? I would’ve told that nurse to F-off in a heartbeat! I am 100% behind these women fighting for decent treatment in the maternity ward!!!
I had a friend who is a doctor in Mexico and she says it's weird that we do that and in Mexico the allow the women to do whatever feels right and there mostly just there to catch the baby and do follow-up care
For 15 years I’ve been preaching this. Maternal care is horrific along with obstetrics. You literally have to have a HUGE gnarly backbone to scream at them and threaten them with violence while in labor. All four of mine I had to fight tooth and nail to get it my way.
Way to freaking go. Your a boss.
It shouldnt have to be this way.
Nope I did this and got 51/50d and tranquilized. I told them I was going to get up and leave they said you can't we put the epidural in already and I told them WATCH ME as I started moving my legs. Then they subdued me so they could violate me however they wanted. When I kept screaming after they injected me my partner was taken out of the room and later he told me the nurses threatened him, saying they would tie physical restraints to my arms and legs if I don't stop screaming. My bodily autonomy was stripped the moment I walked in the door.
@@gingeralice3858OMGGG! I'm in absolute SHOCK! This is SUPPOSED to be the most special, sacred moment of you and your partner's life! Yet you were treated like you stumbled into the looney bin! All that was missing was the forced shock therapy! How disgusting, I'm so incredibly sorry you experienced this!!
@@eveningstar8581As someone who’s experienced mental health wards, and agrees with everything you said, can I just ask you to not use the term “looney bin”? It’s incredibly disrespectful to suggest that there’s places where mentally disabled people are to be put so that they can be treated like objects or livestock…which is what “looney bins” or asylums for the insane were for. To call someone “looney” is just an ableist way to dehumanize them by suggesting that their behavior is connected to the phases of the moon. It’s archaic and rude, which I’m sure you don’t mean to be, which is why I bring it up.
How!? When I'm going through contractions I don't even have the energy to fight for myself.
I had three c-sections. My first two were emergencies, so I had to schedule my last. I was left alone in my room, for hours, without being checked on. When I asked, politely, if the baby could be taken one night, I was told that they were too busy. My first pregnancy, that was the norm for the baby to be taken by the nurses at night. I had nurses for all 3 children that should not have been employed. After my 2nd was born, they set him on me while I was being sewn back up. The nurses were busy talking and he started to turn blue and cold. I couldn’t hold him properly because I was still being operated on. The anesthesiologist alerted them that the baby was blue, because they were too engrossed in whatever they were talking about. For my first, I was in labor for 12 hrs with no progression by the baby. They finally called my OB in, and she was furious. The baby’s heart rate dipped and they wheeled me off to surgery. His umbilical cord was wrapped TIGHTLY around his legs. He wasn’t going ANYWHERE. It’s absolutely ridiculous. Moms (even the pros) need help and care, not to be treated like discard. It shouldn’t matter what color a person is. Pregnancy, birth, and postpartum should be given more respect and care. Mothers should not be treated like animals. Our country should have the best medical care, not the worst. It’s shameful.
Pregnant people??? Maybe stop eliminating word woman to protect women for starters?
True i heard that im surprised no ones talking about it
As a doula, I have witnessed multiple events of maternal mistreatment. The culture of birth is incredibly repressive. If a person, doula, father, friend should want to speak up, it is made very clear their advice is not helpful or wanted.
I hope along with mothers, fathers and birth helpers that change is happening.
Thank you for witnessing and supporting and advocating. You can share your stories of witnessing obstetric violence on Cristen’s/ Birth Monopoly’s map of obstetric violence.
Jeezus, do women need to start hiring medical malpractice attorneys as their labor support partners? I'm not entirely joking here.
@@leighreinhart6185honestly yes. Having advocates in the delivery rooms is so important.
@@leighreinhart6185reasons like these are reasons that I, even at the young age of 22, have already been looking into either birthing at home or a reputable birthing center (I would prefer to at home). I’m doing the research and work now, so that when I’m married and about to give birth I’ll be knowledgeable. Of course with the help of reputable sources like a midwife and things of the sort! But the cost just doesn’t seem worth it. Financially and mentally/physically.
My mom told me stories like this and guess what I never had kids I’m literally afraid to. She told me that at one point she had had an ectopic pregnancy and she didn’t know what it was going on so she went to the doctor because she was having pain and the doctor said she was just upset because she was pregnant and to go home and then her friend told her to go see another doctor and she had to get surgery immediately. Even my brother, he used to date this doctor and one time I was telling her about a really bad cold I had that gave me pain all over about and she goes “oh I thought people were lying when they came in and said that” I was like wtf, this is a doctor?? I’m happy that woman won all that money. If you’re mistreated SUE. Don’t trust people because of their title.
I had one child and the experience with pregnancy and childbirth was so traumatizing I refuse to have another
I opted to give birth with a natural birth center thank god. I can’t imagine the horror of this treatment on TOP of giving birth. I was so lucky my midwife could come with me and take over my care at the hospital. However, the nurse I had was clearly at the end of her shift and was extremely rude, I rolled to one side and she screamed at me “DONT THROW UP ON ME!!” I wasn’t sick I was just in pain. I can only imagine what my care could’ve been like if my midwife couldn’t be there.
I opted into the natural system because the hospital I was at berated me for asking about anything! Id say oh I’ve been having back pain or something like that and all they say was “well yeah, you’re pregnant.” I was belittled when I asked for a non medical intervention birth the male doctor scoffed and said “Why wouldn’t you want pain medicine?! If I was going to pull your teeth you’d want it.” That was my last straw, pulling teeth and birthing a child are so different.. I don’t have to help you pull my teeth. Pulling teeth isn’t natural.
I had an unwanted labioplasty (labia minora) after the birth of my daughter, because the doctor decided I needed to be "tidied," and I "would appreciate it." I saw the horror in my nurse's face. And, I was in a pretty good amount of soreness and pain for a while after. I started getting feeling back after about a year, and it took probably 3 years to totally get my feeling back. My s*x life was ruined for quite some time. He literally cut off my nerve endings to "tidy" me up.
I came from a generation of listen to your doctor and do what they say. Same actually with my dentist, and my gums are permanently ruined from someone who didn't know what they were doing--and I suffered in silence.
Oh my gosh, that is sick! You should have sued! I am so sorry!
I’m soo grateful for this segment! I thought I was going crazy! I’m now 9 months pregnant with my first child & the experience has been HORRIBLE! From ignored concerns about the care I was receiving (which led to a trip to the ER btw), to my provider threatening to transfer me out every time I brought up a concern about my own health, to nurses being rude to me because I was bringing up issues we encountered in there care. You can’t imagine what it feels like to be belittled for advocating for yourself while gestating a human. It’s devastating 😔
Unfortunately, many of us can imagine, because we've lived through the same. This shouldn't be the case! You should have been listened to, supported, encouraged throughout. We all should be. Now is the time to demand this for future birthing people. We need to demand it for them as people before us should have demanded it for us!
Sorry for what you’re experiencing 😞
This is why I went for a home birth. I was seeing an obstetrician at first and she was very rude. I decided to go the home birth route for respect and comfort. It’s been great so far. I’m 8 months currently. I wish you and your baby all the luck and positivity.
If you cannot change doctors at this late date, try to labor at home as long as possible. Be firm when you go in and have someone with you who has experience with birth who knows what you want and will advocate for you if you can't do it for yourself. Someone who you feel calm and peaceful around. Hiring a doula could be an option if you don't have a significant other, relative, or friend who fits the bill.
My mother was amazing and my husband copied everything she said and did which helped amazingly. They reassured me that I could do what I had said I wanted and that I was doing great, in contrast to the nurses and midwives questions and suggestions that had me doubting myself and fearing that I was going to fail.
@@Kaitlyn-mi4ql Thank you for the kind words 🙏🏽 I absolutely wanted a home birth especially since I’ve been low risk my whole pregnancy. But my husband was totally against it & wouldn’t even consider it. He thought it was “less safe” & didn’t wanna risk it since this is our first pregnancy. But if we hv a second child I’m 1000% going that route!
@@jwrightgardening Luckily I was able to change to a different doctor & hospital altogether. It’s sooooo much better! It was a night/day difference. I was able to get a midwife (which is what I wanted), she’s sweet, she listens & she’s very reassuring. I literally cried after our first meeting because I was just so grateful that she was nice to me.
I hated giving birth in the hospital with my daughter. I had to threaten my doctor during labor. My son was born at home and it was waaayy better than my experience in the hospital.
The reporter is referring to women as birthing person. NO, IT’S WOMEN. Is it wrong to say woman? What’s wrong with us?
Both my son and myself left our delivery permanently disabled. The doctor belittled my problems and I went 5 years undiagnosed with a spinal injury and severe pain. Now, 18 years later the damage of that day are still affecting me in new and painful ways. Pain is an everyday thing for me.
You should have sued
Call a lawyer!
I did contact a lawyer but because of the consent forms they had me sign there wasn't anything the lawyer could do in my case. As for my son, they wanted to go after my doctor when she wasn't even there that night. I had ended up with her colleague that night who was rude and belittling. I've worked with labor and delivery nurses who feel like negligence paid a big role in what happened to my son.
My first 2 births were terrible. I wanted a home birth with #3 but my husband wasn't confident we could do it. That experience was awful as well and my husband said if we were to ever have more kids that we could do it at home. Our next and final births were the best ever, in our own home, no complications, no nurses mashing on my stomach or sticking their hands inside of me. No fear mongering or pressuring me into things I don't want. Both to healthy children in a comfortable environment. I feel so awful for these women, there's so many more stories just like this.
We have similar stories
Is home birth expensive?
@@yume816cost and regulation in every state is different.
@@yume816 In my experience, it's about the same as the out of pocket cost after the insurance pays the hospital. It's going to vary though from one midwife to another, probably depends on state too. Usually home birth is not covered by insurance.
My home birth was the most empowering evening of my life. My hospital births I was yelled at made fun of for my age (19) and no one ever talked to me only about me and never used my name. Epidurals were forced on me. Breaking my water was forced on me. Like someone mentioned above I felt like cattle.
Pregnant PEOPLE?! when did WOMEN become a bad word?! Extremely misogynistic.
I had all 7 of my babies at home with a midwife. They were all wonderful caring and respectful women. I loved all my births. I can't imagine being treated this way at such a vulnerable time.
My heart bleeds for Kimberly. I remember seeing her video years ago while researching traumatic birth/PTSD. I’m so glad she’s doing as well as she is. That poor woman 😢
She is an incredibly strong human being, I love her.
I know she really appreciates this comment and support.
When I had my child almost 30 years ago, my doctor was abusive and bullying to me the whole time. I didn’t tell anyone. I should have changed doctors, but she broke my spirit to the point I felt I deserved to be treated this way because I never spoke up for myself. I assumed the actual birth would be better and happy, but she happened to be there already for another patient, so she was around from the beginning. The birth turned into an emergency situation after a few hours because she upset me so much. After my emergency c-section, they couldn’t find anyone to program the pain pump. I was awake and in excruciating pain and begging for at least a Tylenol…she said no. It was like that for about 2 hours. The whole experience that should have been happy, was horrible. Not only did I never have another child, but I never went back to a doctor for 25 years until I developed cancer. Even then I saw doctors as well as their staff lacking empathy and just rushing everything. I think that’s the problem with some of these stories, as well as others I’ve heard. Birth is a process, and they don’t have time or patience, and try to rush that process when it shouldn’t be rushed. Medicine in general has taken the “care” out of healthcare and it’s sad. 😢
You are correct 💯
Once you become a patient you stop being a person.
@@CricketGirrl Thats what I have been trying to describe. When you go in the hospital, your just in a different type of jungle. You have to fight to survive just as much there, but in a different way.
A lot of doctors suck most of the time, they’ve seen so much they have no emotions anymore
I feel so lucky having wonderful nurses during my labor. With my second baby I went to the hospital being 8 cm, they all were incredibly nice and told me they’ve never seen someone so organized and calm which was pretty encouraging to hear. The doctor broke my water only when I was ready to push. Poor women. First, they go through so much pain, and second of all, have to deal with all this
I was blessed with a wonderful birth experience but i was in total control and gave them all a copy of my birth plan before. They respected it and the doctor even read it himself as soon as he entered my room to deliver my son. I felt heard and i was able to also push with my knees closed like I requested to move baby down fast and it worked! Im very thankful. My heart breaks for these women. BE YOUR OWN ADVOCATE.
Thank you for adding a positive birth story in these comments. I’m approaching 20w and I want to be informed of issues that could happen and have started my birth plan. I just really hope the hospital I give birth in will respect it, but it sounds like from some of these negative stories consent is sometimes ignored or falsified. From the sound of it, my husband shouldn’t hesitate to call a lawyer in the middle of labor if an instance of that happened.
This is in maternity wards all over the world though. I was yelled at and emotionally abused because I was screaming too much. Then after the birth the nurses gossiped and made fun of me and still continued to bully me. The birth didn't hurt as much as the emotional scarring from that experience. But anyway I learned about human rights and got the hell out of that country.
Geez so sorry that happened to you.
This happened to me too. 14 years ago. I still have problems because of the episiotomy cut, with no consent, which caused a 4th degree tear through my rectum. No consent. On tape. And I still couldn't get an attorney to take the case. Glad to see attention finally being brought to what should be some of the happiest days and moments of your life. I had no epidural, was fully traumatized, hemorrhaged, was in shock, had severe PTSD and it was even done in a room full of med students...who ALL saw that treatment...but hey, I had a healthy baby...that's all that mattered, right?
Way too many men see pregnancy and birth as an opportunity to torture women.
It’s fucking bizarre and we HAVE to band together and pass laws to protect ourselves and enforce our rights over our own damn bodies.
That last part, though! I was just saying how ridiculous it is for hospitals and people to repeat that. Shouldn’t both the mother and baby coming out alive be the “minimum standard?” My husband commented that since they charge tens of thousands of dollars, it should be the greatest experience of our lives, putting to shame five star resorts.
Same thing happened to my but he literally cut 6 inches up my rectum. I had 20 surgeries to fix what he did including 2 eleostomies. I still have problems today. I tried to file suit and was actually told by the lawyer that he as paid off.
Wow! So sad 😞
@@melissapack4229you need to contact Kimberly that doctor was evil. Ensure you eat ripe bananas and avocado's to go easier
I feel much less alone in the trauma and ptsd I now suffer from from the birth of my son and the permanent injury I now live with
I am still very upset what happened to my daughter. It has left her with lasting emotional/physical effects and no confidence in doctors or maternity staff at that hospital. What she went through should not have happened!!!
The hospital and staff needs to be held accountable!!
Stories like this are the reason I chose a home birth 6 years ago. I had a low-risk, healthy pregnancy and knew that I didn't want to birth in a hospital, surrounded by strangers, in a small room, with loud sounds, and many restrictions. I ended up having a successful home birth with 2 midwifes, a doula and my husband. They were all I needed. No machines, no bright lights, just warmth and support. I actually had a complication-shoulder dystocia-but my midwifes were so experienced that they helped me out of it. I didn't get cut, didn't rip, and my daughter was born healthy.
If you have a row risk pregnancy, I highly suggest finding a midwife team with a lot of experience and having the baby at a birth center or at home. You don't need a hospital to have a safe, healthy birth.
❤❤❤right
You need to vet the hospital you’re going to deliver and your doctor. These stories are horrific but there are also many happy stories where mothers and babies were truly cared for. I had a home birth with my first and my second I was diagnosed with severe preeclampsia and had to be induced and delivered in a hospital. I was treated very well. These stories are barbaric but this isn’t the “norm”.
Thank you for clarifying a low risk pregnancy. As one who had high risk ones after my first was stillborn I really had to advocate and know my options as home birth wasn’t one.
Also, even with a home birth, still have that plan ready in case things do go south. In my last birth that I fully thought would be a second VBAC, my midwife and I were doing great (I’m in Canada so midwives have hospital privileges in my province) but then we caught on that something wasn’t right. I ended up with a c/s as my old scar from the past one was starting to rupture. I did have a plan for that ready and it was held to which caused at least a little less trauma.
I am very glad for you that you had a safe and happy home birth! ❤
@@pinlight97same. I was high risk. I chose a university hospital specifically for women, and thankfully everything went really well❤ it's scary out here for pregnant women
@stacy585
Bingo! Perfectly said,
Midwifery when low-risk is absolutely the answer.
I had 3 beautiful birth-center deliveries (including 1 shoulder dystocia managed quickly and competently by my midwife) with outstanding midwives.
The doctor that delivered my daughter let me rip and never sewed me up. When I called his office to ask him to sew me up the nurse and receptionist laughed in my face. It took two years before I could wear a pair of jeans without pain. It affected me on so many levels.
Wtf? That whole office is evil.
ok did see a doctor to get it resolved?
Absolutely shocking, I had a 3rd degree tear and the first time I was sewed up was horrible it looked disgusting. I got septicemia from retain products and had a plastic surgeon reconstruct me . Horrible experience. Sorry you went through that .
The birth of my daughter was completely traumatizing. I have experienced what these woman are talking about. I’m so glad people are talking about it.
this is why my mom chose not to give birth in a hospital. after a 48 hour labour I was born safely in her home with the assistance of a midwife. I absolutely would choose a home birth and think it is the safest option.
I experienced birth trauma with two of my 3 births. I was assaulted by 2 doctors and one nurse, I had a medical procedure performed on me without my knowledge or consent, they continued to harm me while I screamed STOP and NO. No one would take my case and help me because it cost too much to sue the hospitals and since I didn't die, my baby didn't die, and I didn't have "catastrophic injuries" my case wasn't worth enough to make any money off of it if we sued a huge hospital. Our rights mean NOTHING if no one cares when they are ignored and laws are broken in our care. The system is so very broken....so thankful for these women who are speaking out and making us all heard. The hospital has made no measurable changes whatsoever to improve the care of the women who trust them. It's all so disgusting...we are supposed to be cared for by these people, not harmed.
I had a similar experience a year ago with the birth of my son. The entire experience was horrific and it's a miracle that we are both alive and healthy. No attorney was willing to take my case because neither of us died. How messed up is that???
I had food, water, medicine, a wet patch, help, and sleep denied me when I gave birth to my second child. And at the end, I was denied a wheelchair when leaving the hospital to my car in the driveway. Only way I got one was that I threatened to tell the people at the window looking at babies about how I was treated and that I'd encourage them to leave with their loved one and go to another hospital.
Same. I was severely anemic and was in labor 32 agonizing hours, all of which I was denied my prescription iron supplements, along with all food, water and sleep for 2 days. After my water broke, they swore they wouldn’t do cervical checks to avoid infection. Well they kept doing cervical checks every hour anyway and I developed a high fever on top of everything else. The stress led me to not progressing and ended with an emergency cesarean where I had a bad reaction to the anesthesia and went into a cardiac arrhythmia, most likely due to the stress my body was already under. The trauma of this experience led me to immediately feeling detached from my baby and I didn’t even want to hold him. I developed severe postpartum depression to the point I ended up giving my son up for adoption. I blame this 100% on the treatment I received at the hospital.
Where I had my kids they insist you use a wheelchair, like they don’t allow you to leave unless your baby is in a car seat and you’re in a wheelchair and have a ride
Thank you for sharing that! I fired my OB when he said I was "stupid" for wanting a home birth. I walked out of his office and yelled out to the waiting room what had just happened and that I decided to have my baby at home. It was a beautiful birth. I had two more after that. #fireviolentobs #obstericviolence
didn't they tell you why they won't let you eat or drink anything and why you didn't get any meds? i heard you can't eat or drink anything because you can aspirate, rare but it's possible, with the pain meds, they will relax your muscles and when in labor it's better to avoid relaxing your muscles because you need the opposite to push your baby. with the wheelchair thing, it's because you need to walk ASAP to apparently aid with healing, i don't know about sleep but just out of curiosity, how were you able to even want to sleep? I mean no disrespect or anything but i thought sleep would be the last thing you would want while in active labor... I'm expecting my first baby and those are things i was told to accept beforehand because it's going to be hard and cruel but i need to be strong because labor aint an easy thing and so many things can lead to bad experiences or worse, someone getting hurt. I know it sounds cruel, it actually sounds horrifying because this is my first baby and i don't know if i would want more kids after this because of what i would have to endure to give birth... I just feel like women are still not well taken care of in hospitals
@@cherylmoche4744no that’s stupid. With my first I was begging for one sip of water and they just said no.
My other pregnancies I tell whoever is with me to just hand me the water if I ask for it no matter what the nurses say.
I can not share my story on here because it’s a long one ,but also after 9 years its still painful to talk about and I have not fully healed. I was never able to have another child for fear of going through the trauma again. I was never able to give my husband another child and our son asks me for a baby brother or sister all the time… that just reopens the trauma I endured and anger I feel for the medical staff.
Pregnant WOMEN not people...nice try slipping that in like that
I personally know a woman who almost died while having a miscarriage, it was late term and they could have done an emergency c-section but instead they left my friend bleeding for nine hours in the waiting room then a hospital bed. The result was the baby that could’ve been saved died and my friend almost died and was in the hospital for days recovering. She had to have blood transfusions because she’d bled so much. But the saddest thing to me was that she told me she could feel when her baby died about 6 hours in. She is a little Hispanic woman who looks like she could be Asian and I actually think they treated her differently because of it
Stories like this makes me wonder if it really about race and social economic status or just a system built off of money with undereducated or undertrained professionals.
@@queenleorobi8253Same. So sad and messed up :(
Health care workers are out of control. I remember after giving birth to my first child I was pulled out of bed against my will to get up and walk. Once you check into a hospital they feel they have all the power over you, mistreatment happens to babies, young adults and elderly patients. Systemic issues that needs to change.
when my mom had her first miscarriage she went into depression and was crying in the hospital room after being told her child wouldn't make it and the nurse told her to shut up and reprimanded her for being upset. if you are a medical professional and your heart turns cold after so many years, do everyone a favour and quit.
The lady who is speaking at 3:30 makes a HUGE point about something I've learned about "caregivers". They often care more about controlling patients than they do about care of patients..... Healthcare in the U.S. has gone so far off the rails in the last ten years it's actually terrifying.
The lack of empathy is everywhere
This makes me heartbroken and disgusted. This is why I’m planning to become a labor and delivery nurse and eventually a nurse midwife, so I can protect and advocate for mothers and help them leaving empowered by their own bodies and what its capable of, instead of traumatized. As healthcare providers, it is our responsibility to advocate for our patients’ rights and safety. The nurses in this video failed their patients. I pray these mothers are able to mentally and physically recover from their experiences.
You won't be able to protect and advocate for women while operating inside the hospital system, it will be a losing battle against policy. Go become a Certified Professional Midwife and serve women in homebirth settings, attending home births changed my life.
@@Morganandbear CNMs can deliver babies in a variety of healthcare settings and at homes. Also how are we to expect a change in policy unless we address it and fight for it; and if we’re not there at the bedside to prevent it? Avoidance or withdrawal from this conflict is not a plausible solution.
@@abigailauger5681 You can try your best but you can't prevent it all bedside, trust me! You cannot control your superiors, nor other colleagues, or fight for a woman in certain situations. The culture is rife. You will likely be ostracized and find work very difficult. Everyone thinks they can change the system from the inside... But in reality it is different
What blows my mind, is that these women are treated like this and then sent a huge bill a few weeks later! You gotta wonder if these doctors push unnecessary additional procedures, like an episiotomy, for monetary purposes? Everything can usually be trailed back to making profits or pleasing investors 🤬😡
Traditionally, the idea behind episiotomy is for better healing of the vagina. Apparently, most women's vagina tear horrendously due to the sheer size and pressure of birthing their babies, are difficult to sew back together and don't often heal well. They do the episiotomy so that there is a "controlled" cut that can be sewn back together "easily". I was taught that mothers are often so filled with adrenalin, medications, and other hormones during the birthing that they don't even feel the cut, which is a fucked up teaching and should definitely change.
@@seapinkoysterThat was the old school of thought. It's been realized that letting the tear happen naturally is better because it'll follow the path of least resistance and therefore be quicker to heal. Episodomies are usually straight lines that go through whatever thickness is along that line including muscles.
Yes tearing naturally usually heals better than a surgical incision however with the way birth is supported in the UK in some midwifery models…the rates of tearing are like 1-2%…vs ours in the US where we have to incentivize providers and hospitals to keep their episiotomy rate low which has unfortunately caused some providers to start ripping people’s perineums (a physical and sexual assault) to avoid a documented episiotomy then lie to the patient and falsify medical records to call it a “natural laceration”. Dr. Steven Hartford at University Southern California did this so often he earned it a unit nickname…The Hartford Maneuver. Hospital just covered him and covered up the pattern of abuse with the medical board when reported also.
They have to be sadists
Very true!
And people wonder why so many young women are terrified to have children. Not only is the economy so bad but every woman in this country knows at least 2 horror stories when it comes to maternal care and labor & delivery in our healthcare system. I’m too terrified.
I feel helpless. I wish there could be a light also shined on elderly care and mistreatment.
The doctor who delivered my son forced an episiotomy on me and suctioned my baby in the presence of my doula and son’s father. He also did not perform the circumcision without any medical justification. I cried the next morning and could have easily gone into postpartum depression but pulled myself together because I knew my son needed me whole.
I had painful unpleasant experiences with all 3 of my kids, from 1992 to 2004. Women's Healthcare in general is wrought with misogyny and disregard. It makes my blood boil to think about it.
My son’s birth experience was extremely traumatic. I’ll never return to that hospital. They ruined what should’ve been the happiest day of my life and I’ll never get over it.
My cousin’s best friend is currently suing her hospital because during her birth the baby stopped breathing and the hospital was not properly equipped with the tools they should have had on standby that would have stabilized her daughter. This resulted in brain damage to baby and she now has cerebral palsy. These women’s stories are heartbreaking.
😢 o my word. Praying for justice.
I still can't talk about my birth experience without crying and feeling enraged and embarrassed at the same time. I'm both relieved and saddened to see this video which means this isn't unusual for a lot women. what can we all do to help?
Talk about it with people.
I am so sick of the blatant and wilful naïvety that people cling too “oh doctors and nurses are in their profession because they want to help!”.
Actually, psychopaths are over represented among populations of surgeons. Some nurses are so bitter, jaded and cynical that it should be criminal.
Someone’s profession does not make them virtuous. Their character determines that.
I was more scared of going to hospital than I was of actually giving birth lol
Edit: sorry, that sounded super invalidating to you op.
I’m so sorry you had that experience. It should not happen. The cruelty shown to women during labour is as bad as child abuse in my opinion. I hope you can find healing. I a so sick and tired of people being mistreated in hospitals, and especially in maternity care. The one place in the world where we Gould be able to go and feel safe.
Educate.
As a woman, I would NEVER have my baby in a hospital. Midwives are the only answer.
hm well I had this amazing midwife reject me because I was over 35 (i was 36) but otherwise in good health. that was my only option besides a hospital. I cried for hours because I didnt' want to deliver in a hospital with a doctor. how about you EDUCATE yourself. not everyone has access to that.@@Mint-kj9kw
As I look back, I realize I was in preeclampsia for weeks and my doctor did nothing. And it was a twin pregnancy on top of that. My daughters and I are a freaking miracle!
My allergist caught my preeclampsia. I switched Drs there in the last month which is why we are alive.
What is really annoying is the fact they didn't call them mother's but 'Birthing persons'. 7:45 Its dehumanizing.
Women. We are women, not birthing persons 😢 that term is so stupid.
I had a terrible experience 33 years ago as a 19 year old single mother. I had precipitous labor no pain meds. I was cut as I was being held down screaming " no don't cut, don't cut!" among other things that I questioned or flat out refused but was still subjected to. I was grateful to have a healthy child of course but as for any complaints I had... I was made to feel like there was something wrong with me.
❤ I am sorry
Well the first problem was you were 19, unmarried & pregnant. Single unmarried people should not be having sex. Babies need a stable & secure household, with two mentally, physically & emotionally healthy parents, to build the foundation of who they will become, (for better or worse), not juvenile sexually irresponsible, entitled & ill equipped parents. No one even cares about that anymore, it's disgusting & a lot of the reason why our country is in shambles. They shouldn't have disrespected your autonomy, you could have sued them for that, but they judged you as soon as you arrived based on your demographic
I have wondered, based on my own experience, if single mothers with no father in the delivery room to be an advocate for them get the worst treatment. I remember feeling punished and thinking it was because I dared to keep the baby in a society where there's a lot of pressure to abort it. That was the psychological effect coming out of my ordeal. Miracle we survived.
@@emilysnyder4857i think it is worse for anyone who doesn't have a support person there. Also of they know you are low income and can't afford to sue them or if they think you are just dumb.
Nah I’ve heard the same horrific stories with support systems or none
I’m so happy that this is finally getting coverage. I’m blessed that I didn’t have complications during labor and delivery and my boys were healthy but the nurses treated me like absolute garbage and one even mocked and shamed me when I was trying to breastfeed the first day he was born. She nearly laughed and made me feel like I was supposed to be producing tons of milk right away and basically forced me to use formula. Well the next day the lactation consultant asked why I was using formula and I explained what the nurse said and lactation consultant said it was 100% normal for milk to take a few days to come in and as long as I could see some milk coming out everything was as it should and to not be discouraged and that a newborns stomach is very small and doesn’t take much to fill. Well she was 100% right and my milk came a lot more a day later. But I was appalled how bad that nurse went out of her way to make me feel like garbage when she had no clue what she was talking about. My baby was healthy and gained weight as he should on my milk. So for my second son I knew what I was doing and basically took no crap from anyone, luckily my second experience was a lot better I think primarily for that reason. Many of these people have no idea what they are doing or how to treat mothers in their most vulnerable time.
When I had my son, every single nurse who came in gave me different, conflicting advice to get my son to latch. At the time I was severely reprimanded for deciding that my son needed formula. My milk never really was sufficient for him, or for my daughter. For both, I breastfed and supplemented with formula, but oh, the guilt!
I had the opposite side of that story. I didn't want to breast feed. I asked for a pump. The nurse begrudgingly brought it in, but refused to set it up or tell me how to use it. She then brought the baby in and left the room. Mind you this was after I was in 13 hours of labor and had an emergency c-section. The baby started crying and I couldn't get the pump to work. I was forced to breast feed to make my baby stop crying. My husband and Mom came in and I was crying with the baby latched on. I kept trying to cover up but the baby was laying on the blanket. My crazy Mom took pictures of me like that. It was an awful experience and all because that nurse judged me for my choices.
That's awful! I had the reverse happened in where I wasn't able to breastfeed much and refused to give him formula. They were so pro breast by the time we went home and couldn't produce, I said to hell and bought formaul. My son was gulping the formula down to a T. I was so devasted and even felt like a failure when I couldn't produce enough food for my son everytime I tried.
PREGNANT WOMEN!!! Not “people”!!!! So disrespectful!!
Stop say people who are pregnant and calling us birthing persons. THIS ONLY MAKES WHAT WE HAVE BEEN THROUGH ABSOLUTELY WORSE! We are women and deserve respect for what we have been through bringing children into the world.
Exactly. No male in the history of the earth has ever experienced this!
I am glad that there is a report about this but this has been going on for a long time now…it’s a terrible shame and I believe it can severely influence a woman’s birth experience and bond between mother and child. Violence against women is real.
Thanks for bringing hospital CEO Jeremy Clark's malpractice to light. He can no longer hide these problems or turn a blind eye. Crazy that the hospital only gets a 2 star review during Jeremy's time as the CEO on Google Maps.
I was induced at 40 weeks. I had terrible excruciating edema, and literally no one at the hospital tested me for preeclampsia as a precaution. As a matter of fact, my urine sample was left sitting out even when I asked about it numerous times. I felt completely rushed and my the anesthesiologist was the rudest man I’ve ever met. He seemed very annoyed that my epidural didn’t take the first time and had to re-do it. It still didn’t work. My son’s heart rate was in distress and they had me hold In contractions and not yell. I was in excruciating pain, could barely move my swollen legs, and had to eventually opt for a vacuum to get him out. Afterwards they wheeled me down to postpartum and the intake nurse there literally put a rolled up blanket and placed it around my son’s head in the bassinet. I had no idea she did this. An hour later she comes back and blames us for placing it there? Wtf! I have ptsd and permanent nerve damage in my legs. I feel like there needs to be more advocacy in preventing maltreatment. I even went to a mother baby center! Just because some women have a bit more complications does NOT mean we need to be treated differently.
I am so glad that the mistreatment of WOMEN is becoming more main stream. Overlooking the way the birth industry has been set up from it's conception with how disconnected from how a normal physiologic labor and birth are even meant to look like, the providers in these hospitals are dismissive, rude, and abuse their "authority" in many ways including ignoring a mother's wishes and birth plans.
Thank you to ABC for giving this air-time. We need to have a system in place like in the UK, where midwives are the main caregivers and doctors support them and not the other way around. I think a big problem in our system is arrogance. Most doctors are wonderful, but there are too many that see other medical professionals as beneath them. This attitude has to stop, because it bleeds over into patient care.
Unfortunately these kinds of practices still occur in the UK. I think it is better here, but I would never birth in a UK hospital out of choice.
The UK system is also terrible. Midwives have been found to pressure or force women in labour to abide by their "unmedicated vaginal birth at all costs" ideology, resulting in scores of avoidable birth injuries and baby deaths.
@@karinkuhlemann5359 Is that related to the Ockenden report of the Shrewsbury and Telford Hospital NHS Trust? I have read a lot of that paper (although not all, 250 pages). The general consensus that I got is that a lot of the problems came from the over-medicalisation of births rather than pushing for "natural unmedicated". I think the likelihood more was that they were pushing for a vaginal delivery - however these labours were far from unmedicated. These women were induced and at times poorly monitored, or yes pushed to have a vaginal birth when actually the medicalisation of the birth had caused a pathological problem. The media seemed to portray that Midwives were pushing the "natural unmedicated birth" stance, when in reality these births were far from natural. I do agree that the UK system is also terrible, I would never birth in a hospital out of choice... I am a Nurse!
Midwives are the main caregivers in a normal healthy pregnancy in the UK. The NHS system is nothing like the American maternity care experience.
@@apebass2215 I disagree unfortunately. It is maybe not as bad, but there is still a lot of obstetric violence occurring in the UK. I speak with women who are interested in or have had home births. A large percentage of them are seeking homebirth with their 2nd baby after a traumatic hospital birth with their 1st. Midwives are losing their skills and are now "obstetric nurses" following obstetrics orders.
God, these stories are so terrible. When I have birth to my daughter this one nurse tried to talk me into an epidural from the moment I arrived. She said she would rather just get it over with, because she'd had to deal with so many first time moms begging for it right before the cutoff. I've always been an outspoken person, and have never had a problem telling people what I want, or don't want, but she was set on it. My sister was in the room with me, she just listened to this for awhile and then told the nurse, "listen, we have a bet for $200 on whether or not she gets an epidural. $200 is a lot of money, I don't think she's gonna fold." You should have seen the look on that nurses face, she looked horrified and just walked out. We never saw her again, and I didn't get an epidural. God I love my sister. The rest of the staff were amazing, just this one old nurse.
That was a good one! I’m sure you two were the talk of the nurses’ station.😂
@@shawndevoid9813 I tell my sister all the time that she should be a stand-up comedian.
I was abused when I had my daughter in 1999, it was a traumatic experience. My daughter is now a mother and had her child at home in the bath tub to avoid this terrible system!
Because of my traumatic experience I did not want to have another child nor do I TRUST DOCTORS OR NURSES anymore. Their attitudes were disgusting and they preyed on and abused your vulnerability.
It was the most violating experience. Then you're expected to pick up the pieces, cover your physical scars, and move on with your life. (Your baby is healthy, why are you complaining?)
I was in my head for years and forced myself to push forward and care for my family.
They should be held accountable for the unnecessary trauma they've caused on women.
With the new laws this will get worse. Look at how many rural areas are loosing maternity care.
I can absolutely believe this. I was told in my recent visit to the urgent care that the OBGYN team did not recommend an ultrasound to check things because 'if you were miscarrying now there is nothing we can do anyway so better to wait till your scheduled appointment 2 weeks from now'. Doesn't the patient have the right to know right away if she is miscarrying? Should she wait in distress and anxiety for two weeks. I was soo utterly shocked. But I pushed for and got the ultrasound anyway and was diagnosed with SCH which helped me prioritze pelvic rest. Something I would not have done if I hadn't discovered the SCH.
This was one of my fears about giving birth and deciding to just not have children. If your Doctor doesn't even listen to you at checkups just imagine in a situation like this.. There is no reason why they should be able to get away with this. The woman who was multiple times it seemed like her doctor was in a rush and just wanted to get out of there which is horrific! He didn't even bother to explain to her what was happening 😭 he should never be allowed anywhere near a patient again.
There is nothing more disgusting than a woman giving birth. I saw a woman give birth in 10th grade part of school project then after realized I never wanted kids. These women think giving birth is a walk in a park.
We’re not going to solve this by saying “pregnant people”. HOW DARE YOU BE SO DISRESPECTFUL?!
I delivered my son 38yrs ago. During my labor Dr ordered pitocin without my consent. I refused it because I saw it written on a board outside my room that I could see from my bed. Nurse talked me into it. My labor went so fast I could not keep up. They ordered epidural as they held me on my side in place I continued to grab the nurse in so much pain they put oxygen mask on me. When I turned over on my back I had to push. I told them in beginning how fast I go from 5-10cm this was my 2nd birth. They got me to delivery room. My support person had gone for a break so did not make it in. My legs in stirrups the Dr cut me and I pulled my leg back and said I feel that. He asked the nurse, I thought she had an epidural? She said it did not have time to work. He localized and continued. I had a healthy baby boy but his birth was traumatic for me. The stories go on & on how women are ignored when carrying & giving birth.
I am so glad I went with a midwife. I wanted to do home births, but my husband wanted hospital. So we found a hoslital with a Midwife care team. I have had 4 births with them. 3 have had complications of varying degrees. But the Midwives advocated for my health and my birth wishes and I am so grateful. Pregnancy and Birth is their expertise! Absolutely horrific what these poor women have gone through...
Your husband's opinion on where YOU give birth is completely irrelevant.
@marzipantart I think there can be situations where a husband can be overly controlling and ultimately the wife (in this situation of husband/wife) should be able to say. But in a healthy relationship, it's OK to take each person's opinion into account and come to a conclusion together. It does affect the husband too in that it's their child, and the care of the wife. I guess in some situations it might be hard to imagine this as a healthy exchange if that has never been your experience. But I would genuinely have no issues considering my husband's thoughts, feeling and opinions on this. I trust him to care about me, and understand the weight of my opinion in the matter. I would care about how he felt, while also caring about how I felt myself.
@@marzipantart My husband is the father of all of our children. He is my husband and care for me and wants me to be safe. He wants our child to be safe. It is relevant because it is our child, not just my child. Also, he is present to help me during labor. Women experience.the pain of labor, but if they have a loving husband thry do a good bit of work as well to hekp their wife experience relief from the the pain. So his role was very important and I am glad he had a say. My husband's opinion is no less relavant than mine. As mine is not less relevant either.
This is one of the many reasons I had a home birth a year and a half ago. I did not want to go to a hospital, and I live in Massachusetts, where we have some of the best care (allegedly). People thought I was crazy and turning "hippie dippy" for having my son at home. First baby, he was out in 6 hours and my midwives took excellent care of me. I'd do it again, but at 35 I think one is enough for me. 😮💨
My first was a hospital birth and it was terrible.I suffered from depression afterwards. My second was a water birth with a midwife and I left with my dignity and a healthy baby. Felt normal 4 days after birth
This makes me sick. I am a nurse and worked in maternity... This is horrible. Not what a patient should experience. It's when a person is the most vulnerable despite it being a "happy" event. So many things can go wrong during and after labor. If you add uncaring staff then it really compounds on the vulnerability of a mom and her child in a moment so delicate and precious. I had to care for a patient who had her bladder cut open during a c-section. The nurses were all hoping the patient was going to press charges against that doctor because that doctor was unprofessional and uncaring. Sadly, not all medical staff go into the medical field to want to help people during a difficult or vulnerable time in their life... It's sick.
Unfortunately, I think the bigger problem, bigger than people going into healthcare for the wrong reasons, is the core of education and culture in our healthcare. Even the professionals who truly want to help people, if they follow standard care of practice for American maternity care, they are doing a disservice. Inductions should be a rare occurrence, cervical checks shouldn’t be done, honestly almost ever, but definitely not before labor starts. Birthing outside the bed should be encouraged. Intervention free birth to should be the norm. not saying you do any of this, but they are standard practice in most places in the US.
It’s a vicious cycle. Because often times when a professional starts doing things that are actually in the best interest of their patients, they lose their jobs. 😕
I delivered my stillborn child, and was gutted, but because the midwife and doctor were so very kind, it was not nearly as traumatic as it could have been. I remain grateful for their gentleness, understanding, and patience. They were so respectful to me the whole time. This made so much difference to me during the lowest point in my life. Knowing they cared, and made an effort to show it showed me that human beings have a unique and awe-inspiring ability to nurture. Too many have lost touch with their ability. We need to get back to it.
Having my 3rd baby, my doctor was not on call that weekend. I got a doctor I never met. 1st, the epidural was placed wrong, and I felt everything. 2ndly, he was trying to rush me and keeping up with the clock. Since it was taking some time for my baby to come out, he was irritated and wanted to use the suction on my baby's head to get her out. Thank goodness my sister was there to answer for me, and she worked in labor and delivery. My sister said, "No, my sister can push the baby out." I had an epidural with my 1st two babies, so I really didn't know how it felt to have a baby not medicated. When my body was ready, I felt the urge to push just like you feel when you poop. It's such a natural feeling. The body knows what to do. Anyhow, as soon as my baby was out, so was that doctor. Another doctor replaced him. Since my sister worked for the hospital, she learned he was rushing me so he could ride motorcycles with his girlfriend.
Oh my goodness are you serious?? What a jerk! I’m so sorry he treated you like you were nothing all because he wanted to clock out. 😳
Happened to me too. They used the suction on my baby to rush him out. His head was misshapen for 5 years. The doctor had a social engagement and didn’t want to spend too much time with me pushing him out. My first child. It was awful and I felt so guilty every time I looked at his cone shaped head because they sucked him out
Your lucky you got a epideral back in my day there was no such thing you feel everything yes you do
wow what a selfish pos
@@Sensoredcensored I'm so sorry!
I gently wacked my doula in labor during a contraction and the nurse told me “we don’t hit in here.”
I had a horrific first birth experience in an Army hospital. The entire thing was so horrible, both medically and emotionally, that my best friend, who was 9 months pregnant herself, started having nightmares about her up and coming birth at that hospital. She ended up doing the unthinkable and switched her heathcare in the last month and had her baby at a private care hospital. If it wasn't for the fact that my husband was active duty and we were at a military hospital, we would have sued the pants off that place. The soldiers and their families are prevented from suing the military healthcare system for any reason or any wrongdoing.
One part that really floored me about the whole experience was hearing about the conversation between two military nurses returning on the same elevator to the maternity ward with my husband, my best friend, and her husband. Evidently, one nurse asked the other if they were enjoying the new posting at the current facility, and the new nurse answerd along the lines of, "much better than my previous posting, over there it was pretty much bag and tag them all day long, I've never filled out that many toe tags in all my days." 😮😢😭
These women are so wonderfully brave for speaking out and telling their stories. I commend them. A code of ethics is greatly needed.
My son was pre-term and 3.5 days of inactive labour a nurse told me to “be quiet because there’s other patients here.”
I had my daughter by c-section and the doctor said “take some Tylenol. I don’t believe in narcotics and other women have done it without.”
When I had an ectopic during Covid, I was in a lot of pain and crying. On a morphine drip. A nurse walked by and said “stop crying. There are people here much sicker.” We are treated quite horribly all over-I’m in Canada.
I went to the wrong hospital it was an emergency and that it was the only hospital that was close by but it still was a mistake.
Those catholic hospitals may have money but they are death traps.
No thank you
I was in a Canadian hospital because my husband and I thought I was having a miscarriage. I was bleeding a lot, we called for an ambulance and they got there after 30mins. When they dropped me off at the hospital, unbeknownst to me, they told the nurses i was just spotting. They told me to get off the gurney and wait in the waiting room, that a doctor would see me. They wanted to see my form of payment 1st. I should say my husband and I are from the US. We were in Canada for his work. Well, my husband arrived at the hospital afterward (he had to look for child care for our son). He was pissed because they still had me in the waiting room, and after back and forth, taking my blood pressure (which it was high), they finally gave us a room. Just for us to wait 5hrs there. After an hr or so in the room, I had to use the restroom. My husband took me to the restroom, and there, a what it felt like tennis size ball of blood came out of me. I screamed for my husband crying that i had just lost my baby. He put me back in the wheel chair and went to look for a DR. As i was in the wheel chair in the hallway crying, 2 nurses just walked by and saw me and kept walking. My husband came back with someone, and he showed him what was in the toilet. The guy flushed it and wheeled my back to my room just saying a dr. Will me me. In the room when we asked the nurse SEVERAL times when we were going to see the doctor. She told us we were not a priority and that there were others ahead of us. My husband and I were shocked she said that to us. I told him if i still have the baby, im not having the baby in canada idc if im going into labor. He better take me to the border of the US. And if we did lose the baby, im not trying until im back in the States. Once we saw the dr. At 1am and paying him $200 to tell us that it looked promising. But i had to come back the next day so they could do a proper ultrasound in a better machine. Which i did come backs only for that next dr. And another $200 to tell me if i am having a miscarriage just to use the bathroom and not to come back to the hospital. I didn't lose my baby girl, thank god. I had my baby in fl. She was a month early, but the doctor and staff were amazing.
I had one terrible hospital birth and vowed to never go back. I’ve had 3 amazing home births, and excited for my 4th soon
I hope everything goes well are you don’t experience any complications!
I hope everything goes great!!
I had a c section with my son that I'm not convinced was necessary even two years later. My son is my only child and I'm pained to think that i missed out on an experience i can't get back. I honestly believe they gave me the c section so they could go home.
This was already an issue in Germany 20 years ago. C sections create greater revenue than natural births
Can you tell the full story pleasr
“Pregnant people” 🙄 like we just gonna keep pretending it doesn’t only happen to women
Yes transmen get pregnant via test tube babies
When my twins were born they were in the NICU for a week. We happened to be in there one day when a nurse came around and vaccinated them. About an hour passed and another nurse came around with a tray full of needles and was going to vaccinate them again....we stopped her and told her it was just done. She was like "oh" and left. They also labled the umbilical stem cell packages wrong. Labeled both packages "baby a"
You gotta watch out in there. This was a well known maternity hospital.
Omg!!! That is horrific! I hope you reported this to the hospital?
They are most likely not vaccinating newborn babies but giving vitamin K? Vitamin K is an important part of the blood clotting process in the body. Newborn babies don't produce vitamin K by themselves, so are at high risk of bleeding out with any slight injury or touch. The first nurse should have provided that information to you instead of just doing it though.
And the second nurse was either an idiot or just had a lack of communication with her coworkers about what was still needed.
@@seapinkoysterbabies in the states receive the hepatitis b vaccine on day one
@@seapinkoystervitamin K is not standard practice in most countries. Why is it that the US has the most maternal and infant deaths, most mental illnesses and allergies yet we claim to do everything preventative? Do british kids with no vitamin k die? They do not. Just be careful because at the end of it all understand that there is profit to be made from healthcare. The shots are not because they care so much about your baby, but because there is $$$
@@michelethe80sbaby what!?! That's messed up. How do they suspect a newborn would catch hep b if the mother doesn't have it? Every drug has possible risk associated with it, so I don't get how they would be able to argue that the benefit outweighs the risk. Hep b is transmitted through body fluids by way of sex, and drug use. If the mother didn't have it (and therefore didn't transmit it during birth) these doctors are disgusting for giving this injection to newborns
I had my first child in a midwifery hospital. I labored for days with no pain relief and still it was a less traumatic experience than the birth of my 2nd child in a typical hospital setting. The amount of support and freedom of movement I had with the older child as compared to the younger was like night and day. With child #2 I could have just stayed home and did it all by myself for all the help the nurses were and I seriously thought at one point I would die from being unable to breathe. They kept bullying and physically forcing me into unnatural positions and would not listen when I told them I was in distress. On top of that, my ob was out of town and the substitute was so old my son was born while he was still getting his gloves on. It was an absolute clown show and we were lucky we were both ok.
Sadly I’m learning this during my first pregnancy. It’s as if we are a number. I’m determined to find a good OBGYN for myself and child.
I’m postpartum by 4 weeks and I find it shocking that pre-birth, I was going to the doctor every week but post birth, even with an injury, I don’t see a doctor for 6 weeks. Like once the baby is out, the woman’s health is once again deprioritized.