Conan the Barbarian Review
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- čas přidán 26. 08. 2024
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In the fantasy age of the 80s, giant dudes with swords fighting puppets were quite a draw for moviegoers, and a lot of that has to do with the success of Conan the Barbarian. Starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, it's about Conan going on an adventure! Just don't try too hard to find the thread that links his motivations together, it can get lost pretty easily.
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People underestimate this film. It actually has a surprisingly deep lesson, all centered around the Riddle of Steel. Conan's father believes in the power of the sword, that it is the only thing a man can trust to not fail him in life. Thulsa Doom argues that flesh is strength, without a hand to wield it, a sword is useless, and that a man who can control those around him has true power. In the end Conan learns that both are wrong, his father's sword failed, and yet it still tore Thulsa's flesh. Neither flesh, nor the steel in the sword represent true strength, it is will. Through will, man can overcome any obstacle, and it was by his will that Conan rose from a slave to a king.
Shit, you're right. I always thought it was the woman who'd go to hell and back for him (aka: ride or die chick) that he could trust, especially since she came back as a valkyrie to save him.
@@questioningespecialy9107Pardon my unintentional interruption, but if Valeria had come back from the dead, and asked me personally:"Do you want to live forever", my answer would've been "Yes, because dying stinks"!
Of course , that's just me...
I love being alive! 61 years young, and I ain't tired of being alive yet! Especially when I get to scope out some happening babes! That alone, is worth living for! Plus:I believe in enjoying life, and living, for as long as my body will allow it!
Perfect
I thought it was also the value loyal friends like Subotai, The Wizard and Valeria that helped prove Conan’s father wrong too.
That damn "Whoa" tree has been stuck in my head for days.
aj mitchell It randomly pops in my head all the time 😂
I was really confused for a few seconds. Didn't remember seeing this video, let alone commenting on it. Until I noticed your user name that is.
6 years now
Great Aku had taken human form and helped the Terminator take down the snake obsessed Darth Vader and saved the world. I feel something is off here
Hell it's even long ago in a distant land.
Brenna Brodbeck E X T R A T H I C C
However, you summed it up in a way that would make for a movie I would pay good money to watch!
You Forgot 1970's Pornstar Jackie chan
I laugh it.
I think it's interesting how the whole story is essentially a perfect classic RPG story.
A kid sees his family slaughtered, is enslaved, becomes a powerful fighter, escapes slavery, becomes a thief, meets a king, receives an epic quest that merges with his desire for revenge.
Also, I really love the acting done for the king. Max von Sydow nailed that role perfectly to me, and sold it all the way.
The Kull story "The Shadow Kingdom" written by Robert E. Howard the creator of Conan, is widely considered the first Sword and Sorcery story ever and Howard is largely credited for the genre's creation. RPG's are of course largely based around S&S tropes and storylines so it totally makes sense that there would be overlap in a movie about the creators works.
Quick point: I'm pretty sure they're not drunk when Conan punches that camel. They're high. The guy tells them about the snake cult, then offers them some "black lotus." Next scene, Conan and Subotai are giggling, and Conan punches a camel.
in fact, certain types of lotus can induce trips, they contain Aporphine...a bit like lsd and yeah, the two seem to be just a couple of minutes on the black lotus
egyptians, mayans used blue lotus to trip...so...blue-black....not so much difference, more a reference
@@Hunne2303 And it wasn't Haga because he wouldn't sell Haga to slayers
Another fun fact. The camel punch was not intended by the director
It was Stygian, the best.
My question would be is it an acting camel or did Arnold Conan really punch the camel and punch it down no less . I mean don't get me wrong I'd feel bad for the camel but honestly that scene stuck with me as a kid just for how results and sudden it was lol . I do agree though that they were a version of high or tripping with how they act at the least if drunk they aren't just drunk lol. Thanks for making me think about that I'd always just wrote it off as "hey weird shit happens" xD
Conan and the Wizard meet
W:I'll summon the demons of Hell
C:You're joking
W:Yes, I am.
lol i'm sorry i find this comment funny
The Wizard is saying if he tries to hit Conan Conan will be a worse demon than all demons in Hell.
Doom hypnotized Conan's mother and tried to hypnotize him at the end, but he rejected it.
According to Director John Millius, that was when he understood the Riddle of Steel, that metal becomes brittle and flesh grows weak, but your will power is as strong as you make it.
To be fair, in his only Conan novel--The Hour of the Dragon--Howard has the Cimmerian spend much of the early part of the story engaging in side adventures like escaping imprisonment in Nemedia and rescuing Lady Albiona. It's not until the halfway point where Conan learns he has to find the Heart of Ahriman to defeat the cabal of enemies led by Xaltotun. He does want to defeat the invaders but makes no headway till that point. In that sense, Conan the Barbarian is faithful to Howard's only full-length story in the series.
The movie borrows modified elements from several Howard stories:
The Phoenix on the Sword (Conan)
Worms of the Earth (Bran Mak Morn)
The Tower of the Elephant (Conan)
By This Axe, I Rule! (Kull)
Queen of the Black Coast (Conan)
Red Nails (Conan)
The Shadow Kingdom (Kull)
The Cat and the Skull (Kull)
A Witch Shall Be Born (Conan)
The sequel obliquely references stories as well:
The Phoenix on the Sword
The Hour of the Dragon
The Mirrors of Tuzun Thune
Rogues in the House
A Witch Shall Be Born
Finally someone else realizes this
I never knew there were so many original stories wow..
That Tree of Woe joke was so fucking good!!! One of the best Decker jokes for sure, thanks for the laugh!
Woe! Woe! Woe, Woe, Woe!!!
Yeah! I see what you mean!
Crom laughs at your review.
Nicholas van der Waard 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Nick, I'm not sure if that is your pic, that you use, but if so..... Do we have a challenger to the "Best Hair" claim!? Lol...!!!!!
To Hell with him then.
@Stoneryoda 937 You`re..
Crom laughs at Arnold's version of Conan.
A small detail Decker forgets. That be Basil Poledouris' absolutely amazing soundtrack for the movie, which is WAY beyond 95% of the soundtracks of the era, with the horns and the drums and the roaring beats, to this day beats even Lord of the Rings in soundtrack if ye ask me.
Aleksi Heikkilä I agree. It shocked me when Decker overlooked the most noteworthy aspect of the film--the soundtrack.
Yes, that was amazing, one of the main reasons I still enjoy watching this film occasionally. I don't know if there's any connection, but some parts of the Orc and Saruman music from LotR reminds me a lot of Poledouris' great soundtrack.
He seldom (if ever) seems to pay any attention to the soundtrack. I can't recall his mentioning it even once in any movie.
He doesn't seem to know much about the movie besides the names of the actors
Small detail?! To me, the soundtrack has always been the star of the film. Even above Arnold. That movie IS the soundtrack. One of the best ever, no question.
Minor point, but since DeckerShado asked, the "Wheel of Pain" is a Flour Mill. So on the brightside from a young age Conan is providing sustaining food for the population! It's also worth mentioning the films incredible Basil Poledouris score, which is viewed as one of Hollywoods all time best.
"If it ever looks like you're losing, Point straight at your Foe and declare them a Nazi"
I damn near pissed myself after hearing that! This is why I love Decker
The funny thing is if you switch Nazi wit SJW it works too ^^
God I love how stupid both sides are.
No, only leftists are stupid. They will be slaughtered, and their women will lament!
Rudolph Antler how’s that epic winning going? (￣▽￣)
It's called the feminist technique
That was the only negative critique ebert had for this movie, he called the execution of thulsa doom a still from a riefenstahl movie.
Wait, is He-man a kid-friendly version of Conan the Barbarian?
That has been rumored, but probably not.
Well, Thulsa Doom in the graphic novels/comics does have a skull for a head (Skeletor), but he's the enemy of Kull before Conan. Kull grew up in Tiger Valley, and He-man rides on a giant tiger...so go figure.
Kinda
Never thought of it that way but that's actually a good point...
Actually yes, the He-Man action figure was an altered Conan figure. Not even joking.
"and raping the Hutts!" Jabba NO!
Get Wrecked Gaming 😂😂😂
Jabba is so gross even the biggest perv in the universe wouldn't fuck him
+Dylan Kaiser I'm pretty sure he IS the biggest perv in the universe. I mean think about it; he comes from a species that looks like giant slugs yet he gets his jollies watching underdressed humanoids. You gotta assume other Hutts look at that guy and lose their lunch.
GriffinPilgrim well in that case... the other biggest perv in the universe
The wizard *did* tell Conan that fire wouldn't burn up there earlier in the movie. He even followed it up by saying that fire not being able to burn up there was why he made his house down below, and not up on the ridge.
Edit: And now that I stop to think about it..How did you miss that, but mention the part where Conan told the wizard to look after his sword? Because the part about fire not being able to burn up on the ridge, was mentioned by the wizard just before that. Odd
My favourite quote is this:
Thulsa Doom: You broke into my house, stole my property, murdered by servants and my pets, and THAT is what grieves me the most! You killed my snake.
It's just the way James Earl Jones delivers that last line. He must really have liked that snake.
I was at a talk with James Earl Jones, he said he watched and read a lot of speeches from dictators like Hitler and Mussolini to get the tone right. The madness and the charisma.
Fun (painful?) Fact: During the cave escape scene, Sandahl Bergman (Valeria) lost a finger about 1/2 way through the sword fight, but she continued the scene despite the loss of the finger. o.O
"Without the flesh, steel is merely an object." Somebody should tell that to Gordon Ramsey. I've tried to "let the knife do the work" and the bastard never got around to doing the damn work!
And Kudoz!!!! for the Tree of Woe micro-sketch!
I'm from Victoria, my house was wrecked, no power, and no water. But even with a dying phone. Still got time for the internet personality with the best hair
Jose Cortinas I hope you're doing ok.
Oh shit, me too. Nice to see someone else in Victoria watches Decker.
damn... QLD here.
I hope your power was restored,
I was chemistry partners with Max Von Sydow’s grand-niece. I tried so hard to get Star Wars spoilers out of her.
Cool.
Conan the Barbarian is basically a movie about the DM pleading with the players to pursue the main story line
Its a great film with a cracking soundtrack, and arnold looks the part , john milius direction was great and he delivered a bloody great conan film with some cracking sword fights, lopez bergman and mako were great in there parts, wish the studios would give us a king conan film arnold could still do it . Great review .
Put that cookie down! Now!
15:59
An accurate description of my 'stealthy-kill' run of Dishonored
You shall forever be known as "Whoa-den," after lashing yourself to the tree of whoa as sacrifice for knowledge
Who else drops whatever they are doing when Decker uploads?
Johnny Doe me.
Johnny Doe always when I'm trying to do suicide, I see that Decker uploads a new video. YOUR SAVING MY LIFE DECKER!
OK a bit too much xD
yep, me
Holding baby, Decker uploads, drops baby. just kidding
Johnny Doe ayy lmao
Trivia: The guy playing the sword master that is teaching Conan the sword was Arnold's sword instructor for this movie in real life.
(I suppose I should warn of spoilers here - even though this is a 35 year old movie) - You may be being too hard on the script-writers here. If you take the Nietzche quotation at the start as indication of the theme of the movie there is a fairly clear (possibly) plot thread. The main assumption is that Thulsa Doom is interested in refining and shaping 'flesh' like steel. He takes all the children from several villages and uses the wheel of torment to refine out the single strongest individual. He then arranges for him to be trained in combat and warfare (shaping). Once this is achieved, his henchman sets Conan free (quenching) and this sink or swim exposure to the real world brings forth his independence. Doom then relies on the thirst for revenge to drive Conan back to him as he hopes to use his hypnotic influence to convince Conan that he should accept Doom as his 'father', thus providing Doom with a powerful weapon to help him in his plans for world domination. And he almost succeeds except that Conan recognises the sword in Doom's hand and breaks the spell.
That is too convoluted and idiotic. Thulsa Doom looked for steel back in the day, not for "flesh tools". He's like Kurtz in Apocalypse Now. And Conan like Willard.
It's just a plot theory and I think it makes some sense. Do you talk in real life like you comment here? If you do you must spend a fortune in pain-killers and band aids.
Just being honest. This kind of secret theories and all might interest some writers but certainly not Milius.
The unusual thing is that what I wrote above is exactly how I perceived the story the first time I watched the film in the cinemas back in 1982 so I don't see it as a 'secret theory'. At the end Doom clearly sees himself as the major formative influence in Conan's life. However, we all see a different picture, personal perspective is part of how we all view art.
When Conan is captured and tortured, Doom says he looked for steel back then. Why would he lie? Again, he's pretty much Kurtz from Apocalypse Now, an ex-soldier turned god. Indeed he is a father figure to Conan, about the riddle of steel (which he reveals), not just pretending so he can "use" him.
Later on he is crucified in the tree of woe which makes the theory even more implausible. In the plot this obstacle is the understanding of the riddle, along with the subplot of friendship/love as his friends come to rescue him; once he is cured, he observes his hand after beautifully swinging his sword, as if he has finally understood.
Technically, before he went off on his snake chase, Val tried to talk him out of pursuit. Ultimately, it was his vendetta that made him go alone and get jacked up. Thalsa Doom also hypnotized his followers with his snake charm wizardry. His spell was broken on his followers once he was dead. He used the same spell on Conan's Mother, then on Conan at the end. It was Conan looking down at his Father's broken sword that broke the trance and allowed him to strike out. This movie has some really great subtext that has yet to be explored
Decker his owner freed him after his answer was more aligned with the owner's thoughts than anyone elses.
Basiclay he was scared of Conan and so he freed him before Conan had the thought of just KILLING his master and free himself.
Arnold punches a camel in this.
Great reference on the Robert E. Howard collection - those illustrated volumes of short stories are awesome!
CONAN'S MY FAVOURITE ARNIE MOVIE!!!
And it inspired my life a lot.
How lame is that?!
😂
But it's true.
😃👍
So I take you don't speak much, have long hair and tend not to wear a shirt? Fair enough.
GriffinPilgrim don't forget the FUCKING
+deathstroke the terminator Well that goes without saying...
GriffinPilgrim
Except the shirt thing, yes.
😂
Bernd Erwin
Umm...
What the fuck?
Since when Conan only fucks demon chicks?
😂
i shot milk out of my nose laughing at the tree of "woah" bit XD AND I WASN'T EVEN DRINKING MILK D:
Congrats on the engagement, which may be ages old now but whatever. Congrats anyway! Also, I love that Tree of Whoa.
Woe. The Tree of Whoa is Keanu's.
That jet fuel joke was pretty funny, man. My favorite from the whole review, I think. Tree of whoah was a close second
And I honestly had never considered how muddied his motivation is in this flick.
About the plot and the (in)consistent motivation:
1. When Conan is a slave, he cannot choose to go pursue revenge because slavery. Besides that, we're still in act 1 and the big book of movie rules says we have to establish his character.
2. His choice to hunt for treasure and (having obtained it) goof around is addressed by the narration which is included in this review: "success can test a man's mettle as surely as a strong adversary" (paraphrased from memory).
3. The rest of the time he's actually pretty focused on his revenge quest.
Conan's distraction from the plot is a deliberate creative choice. We can discuss whether it's a _good_ creative choice (I felt the movie sagged a bit), but it's clearly deliberate.
Knocking out the camel still makes me crack up to this day. Its right up there with the Yeti kicking the bad guy through the goal in the Mummy 3.
the yeti moment is so random lol
Congrats on the engagement Decker!
I love that tree bit u did it was pretty fun good shit man.
Amazing epic! One of the best movie soundtracks ever!
2010: "Hello, worldwide web, I'm Decker Shado..."
2017: "HELLOWORLDWIDEWEB, I'MMADECKAHSHADO..."
Next is total recall I'm calling it
Mrgamer101 Vs CZcams Probably Conan the Destroyer
Prob
What is your favorite terminator movie of all time
3:51
Awggggggh..agggggggggggh..
Aaagggggghuuuuh.. awwwweggggg....
Aawweggghhguuhh...
That must have been fun to film. "Okay, so i´ll take of my shirt and you chain me to the tree over there...."
14:34 I got such a good laugh off of that. Thats definitely one of your funniest moments.
What is best in life ........ to crush your enemies, see them driven before u, and to hear the lamentation of their woman.
The wizard - Akiro - is referring to the fact that "there never burned a fire in this spot before", which seems to be of some kind of mystical significance. It's much clearer stated in the german version, oddly enough.
'... And killed a PET!'
To be fair, it is a giant goddamn SNAKE!
Good to see you getting back into it my dude! Stay safe down there, what with the hurricane and all.
It just cracks me up every time I see that camel collapse like that!
Hollywood should cast Decker for a Sci-Fi Jesus film.
19:50 Ancient Atlantian Sword vs his father sword.
His father sword, never had a chance.
Oh Decker, never fail to make me laugh. Great video! looking forward to future uploads!
One of my all time favourite movies. Been waiting for you to review this for a while.
Interesting, the wheel of pain is actually a grist mill, and the wheel itself is used to push around a massive mill stone to grind up grains.
Amazingly enough, that giant snake puppet looks appropriate for a Titanaboa
Oh man, this is the first video of yours I have seen. And just... that Tree of Woah bit. I laughed so hard, well done!
how you holding up Texas? with the storm?
I'm on the edge of the storm, so it's not too bad here except for insane amounts of rain. I'm quite happy that so far, we haven't actually lost power.
Decker Shado stay safe out there man, I'm a chicken.
Decker Shado can u please do review on the Michael Myers Halloween franchise like u did with a nightmare on elm street and Friday the 13th after u get done with the reviews u plan on doing please, ur awesome
I can see it now "hello worldwide web, I'm decker shado, the Internet personal with the best hair, and it's time for THE SUMMER OF HALLOWEEN or THE SUMMER OF MICHAEL MYERS" that sounds good. 👌🏾👍🏼👍🏼😁😁😎
Yeah I'm in the southeastern corner of Texas and besides a few puddles it's not too bad here
the older I get the more I think, this may be my favourite movie of all time. So much testosterone, yet so much humor. Arnold may not be exactly Conan, but he is perfectly cast in this.
He cast the Snakes to Arrow spell, a modified version of the reverse of Sticks to Snakes spell!
One of my favorite scenes is in the movie Conan the Barbarian starring Arnold Schwarzenegger. The scene takes place inside Thulsa doom, the necromancer, mountain layer. Conan and his band of thieves are leaving with the kidnapping princess, when entering Thulsa doom top two henchmen. Conan, Arnold Schwarzenegger, then turns over the green soup of cooked human fesh...so the henchmen replies, "YOU". If you listen carefully to this scene it is an amazing stunt by Arnold Schwarzenegger. You can actually hear him strain as he turns over a container filled with gallons of water. When he perform this stunt, it adds to the thrill of this remarkable scene.
I happen to be a big fan fantasy adventure stories. Such as Hercules the Legendary Journeys, Xena Warrior Princess, Red Sonja, Kull the Conqueror, and Conan. I'm also a huge Arnold fan as well. So that being said, I'm a huge fan of this movie.
The voice of Aku was another great one for me in this movie. James did well too
The less metal gear and more dishonored line was so good!
why did i never realize this was the summer of arnold swarchenegger... i watched like every video this summer
Hey! Another upload! Thanks decker!
It's got one of the best movie soundtracks ever. Basil polidorous produced an epic movie score for this film
I've always taken it that the reason this movie doenst have a lot of exposition, backstory and world building is because Conan doesn't know or care about any of that shit.
I saw this movie when I was about 7 years old in the late 1980s and I remember thinking Valeria wasn't really pretty and disliked the choice of actress for the role. As a grown man however I think the actress is gorgeous.
im 47 nowadays and luckily i got to see this in the theaters thanks to my dad. (:
Who got the Lemmy Kilmister joke? It can't be a lot, good job Decker
glad ur back big D.......
also that u missed the worse of the weather..
fuck ur engaged now, that makes me happy so congrats 2 u!
now dont stop what u do! ur awesome
One of my all time favorite movie.
Thanks for the 4 stars, Decker.
"Solid snake archery" Hahahahaha xD
Love this movie and love your review, had me in stitches. Thanks man!
the soundtrack is awesome, it has a few flaws but it's a good movie, I've watched it countless times.
I've read some of the Connan comics a while ago
OMG....those nifty little references....jet fuel and such...
very nice...also, that tailor lvl 3 again had me clean my monitor...thx decker!
oh and that green soup...keep it to you, but it´s a soylent green predecessor...quite tasty^^
after all, I´d say Conan is THE medieval Mad Max
I’d love to see a modern day Conan movie!
To be fair if you look closely the wheel of pain looks like grain mill or crusher in order to make flour from grain.
That stunt lady jumping off those rocks (Riddle of Steel) broke a standing stunt record at the time.
Aku is narrator, holy fuck Mako is amazing, rest in piece, you told the story of big buff bodybuilder who would be named for action movies.
Just when I was bored as fuck, Decker comes to the rescue. Cheers man!
Hope you're keeping safe with the storm, Decker. As soon as I heard it was in Texas, you came to mind. Take care, dude.
cant belive u didnt mention ron cobb as the market stall guy
I can't wait for the next marathon you have planned!😁
(Sory for bad english) Who else remembers when they pillaged a village in civilization 4 and started to regret it
nah pillage all the lands
When decker uploads, you know it's gonna be a good day. :)
I wanted to name my first son Conan. I think my wife would have let me, but my mother-in-law flipped shit when she found out. So we had to pick a name before we could leave. We had like 20 mins to decide. I settles for Conan being his middle name.
Your reviews are awesome.. Keep the uploads coming
I dont usually subscribe for like years. But the tree of woe bit and James Earl Jones did a lot of fuckin won me over. Thanks for the laughs
4:35
Conan: what is a not sea?
The Smiley at 6:36 is the best! :D
Great Decker, now everytime I watch this movie and see that guy i'm going to think, "hey that's Lemmy Kilmister!"
i bet that the person a demon with the exact same voice of him.....NAMED AKUUUUU
It's three spells...One to straighten the snake (could be necromancy, could be enchantment/charm, could be alteration), one to make it aerodynamically sound without fletching (negating the severe to-hit penalty that would be incurred - could be invocation/evocation or enchantment/charm) and one to auto seek (providing an additional bonus of 4 on to-hit rolls - could be invocation/evocation or enchantment/charm). This explains why he hit at such extreme range and why he rarely uses it in combat...Takes three rounds to cast.
The reason why Valeria was not resurrected is because she died of poison. So she would not have come back even if the spirits were fended off since she would still be poisoned and would simply die again. Conan, on the other hand, simply expired. All he needed was a little bit of water. So HE could be resurrected, but not HER
My all time favourite movie and soundtrack!
What do you see?
Uhh, infinity!