I didn’t think this video would apply to me because I have little kids but it was really interesting. Maybe in this crazy time we will try this discipline. Thanks!
I’m kind of speechless! As an Orthodox Jew, Shabbat has been a part of my life from birth. I am watching this while I’m cooking ahead for Rosh Hashana and chuckling because boy is it a lot of work to prepare for our precious days off! But the psychological benefit to knowing that you *can’t * be running around doing errands, cooking and cleaning or helping kids with schoolwork is priceless for the permission to recharge without guilt. Reading for pleasure, long read alouds to the kids, chatting with neighbors outside, long, lingering meals where we connect as a family, talking about Torah but also the world is a great vehicle for transmitting our values to our kids. And of course the time to take stock of ourselves and explore and reaffirm our connection to God. All of this contributes to our overall wellbeing. Thank you for putting this out there!
I’m so glad you chimed in here!! I had to laugh when people were commenting what a brilliant concept it is and I’m like yup wish I’d thought of it! Happy New Year and happy planning and prepping! I have so loved learning about so many Jewish holidays and traditions from dear friends and even been invited in on some - THE FOOD OMG!!!!!❤️❤️❤️❤️
Thank you so much for sharing your practice. I am a Sabbath Observant Orthodox Jew and I can’t tell you how much I look forward to a appreciate have a day off. To me the day is filled with self reflection, prayer, and most importantly QUALITY time with myself, my family and friends. We eat meals together, play board games, read books, and just generally take a break from the stresses of life. I’d also recommend even if you aren’t religious having a day to unplug. Digital detox is so necessary and while I love how connected we all feel using our devices taking a day to make sure you focus on the people physically around you is so important.
Thank you SO MUCH for weighing in as I love hearing from those who practice and have found the benefit of it! I feel like it's so important for all humans!!
So many great points, Jen! Our society is so bad about taking time off. We loved that about our recent trip to Colorado. It was so much unlike a Disney trip where it’s a lot of go, go, go. It was relaxing and EXACTLY what we needed!
I'm a SAHM whose kids are off to college. My hubby is a very busy attorney (read: workaholic). My time is largely my own. Like someone else commented, I feel like I need to be intentional with my time. I occasionally claim what I call 'a lazy day'. I need to reframe that thought into restorative and actively practice that concept. This vlog resonates, Jen. Thank you!
Do you ever know something is true but really just need someone to be straight with you and TELL YOU? That’s what this entire thing is for me. I know I need to do it, and we SORT OF do, but I need to be intentional. Right now Sunday is the only day of the week that all of us are home and not supposed to be working at our jobs, so we always feel guilty not working on house projects and getting stuff done. But we do need the rest. The idea of really preparing to take a full day of proper rest is really the shift in mindset that I think we need to work on at our house!
It has two benefits, really, because not only do you get that full day to rest it REALLY gets your motivated to get the work done! Either in the other weekend day or spread out throughout the week. I hope this works amazingly well for you, Susan, and you find yourself enjoying every minute of that rest day!
Joyful Living with Jen Lefforge thats really it, is getting that motivation to get SO MUCH DONE the other days so I can be intentionally restful on a particular day. Now we’re in a cycle where I’m not very intentional about the rest time, so I end up feeling lazy and guilty for resting! Also I feel VERY called out (in a good way/this is important way) about the idea of spiraling into martyrdom when you feel like every day needs to be go go go. Hiiiii it’s me. 🤗
This topic on the surface seems like it's a no brainer and easy, but it's crazy how incredibly HARD it is to relax and slow down for a brief minute!! THANK YOU FOR THIS VIDEO, didn't realize how much I needed this
Love Love Love Love this. Back in the day when dinosaurs roamed the earth and I was a single parent of three, the "girls" and I would always call Sundays "brushing your hair and teeth optional" days. We Loved to watch "B" grade movies and eat food out of cans. LOL When I met "happily ever after husband" and we had "the teenage boy" I've forgotten how incredibly important this is. I so appreciate this Jen, you are the BEST. In this "time of great unpleasantness" this couldn't be any more important. Tremendous concept!!!!!
I’m so glad you liked it! And gosh how I wish i could take credit for it, but it’s truly an ancient practice and one I think all humans need!! Thanks, Carrie!
It’s hard to express in a 12 minute video what embracing it did for me, mentally and spiritually! But it takes some trial and error and discipline. In other words, learning to rest well is a lot of work. But worth it!
I am notorious in my family for getting “Sunday Blues” if I do all my work on Saturday because then I feel lazy and bored on Sunday. I am terrible at relaxing. I don’t enjoy it. I enjoy being productive. I have found a few things (listening to a podcast while doing a paint by number or going for a walk around the neighborhood, for example) which I can count as both, thus convincing myself to “relax” but, for the most part I feel happier when I am getting something done. I like the concept of what you’re saying, but I’m thinking about what it would look like for me.
I've commented this on here and Instagram multiple times, but seriously, thank you for being the mentor I need! I quit working when I had our oldest son 6 years ago to be able to raise him. Now we have an almost 4 year old and a 3rd due in 8 weeks! I find myself with no days off (husband in airline industry) and begging for one in my head. But as you stated, I don't even know what I would do for restoring time. If I'm at a doctors appointment without my kids, I'm thinking and worrying the whole time. My life has become them and I'm not complaining about that. I love it. But I would also love something of my own. This has given me so much to think on and plan for. Thank you. ♥️
Lydia, find those things for you NOW. Those littles will be grown and gone in the blink of an eye and maintaining your own identity is SO IMPORTANT for your emotional health! And I'm honored that you see me that way, thank you!❤️
I try to take my day off on Saturday. I am committed to & active in my church, so Sunday tends to be a little hectic. That day off is important! Sometimes, it's half Saturday, half Sunday! You know, life happens! 😅
I have done this for years. For me the day of the week would vary but if I didn't have a do nothing day then I was miserable and exhausted. Sometimes it was just a half day but with four kids and their activities and my own commitments it was better than nothing! My kids are grown so I get a lot of do nothing days now.😊
As a person who works in a church it’s very important to find a different day during the week to be Sabbath, not the day you work in the church, because you need the downtime to restore yourself. Thank you for the video!
I love this video!! We can't make it work these days at our house with littles with special needs because of their daily therapy schedules - BUT, that doesn't mean we don't try! So, everything you say completely applies - it just means that the result isn't necessarily a 'day off' but instead, an afternoon off, or an hour off, or just some quiet time. And, no joke, when things start to feel a little overwhelming, my husband and I still say to each other 'at least it's not twins'! 😄 I dunno how all y'all twins parents manage!
The best purchase I ever made as a mom was a hammock. Lying in it means I can’t do anything else. I might play some chill 70s music or listen to the birds, but mostly I just stare up into the trees and feel small in the universe (in a positive way). It puts my life into perspective and recharges me.
This is a great idea, Jen, I also think that, when working from home, there is a 'guilt' attached when you do take some time for your self. its so easy not to have clear working time.
Steve it’s so true!! The time is less structured so it’s easy to just let work time turn into all the time. That doesn’t work for me as I tend to be a workaholic, so it’s a necessary thing to set aside the time!
I take a day off every weekend, with the exception of this past weekend when my husband went hunting and I cleaned (because I always clean to keep my mind busy when he’s gone). Instead I took yesterday off, and it was awesome. I have been having some issues with my mental health as of recently, mainly with anxiety, and I know I can’t skip having intentional down time.
(warning my pastor is going to come out with this statement;): I truly believe we were DESIGNED to need rest (beyond just sleeping) and that we cannot human correctly if we don't lean into that. I take it VERY serious, especially from a mental health perspective, because I have tried living without it and it wasn't pretty. AT ALL.
Joyful Living with Jen Lefforge my dad is a pastor, I’m used to the pastor coming out on the regular 😂 (I always know I’m about to get a personal sermon when a sentence starts off with either “you know I love you buddy....” or “let me tell you a little about something....”). I really do we can’t human without rest, and I have really learned that the hard way. Grateful for an understanding family, even if my husband still has a hard time with the actual resting on his part.
Wow, does this resonate for me or what?! This concept will change everything...definitely need to and will do this. Sunday is my day this week and I'm looking forward to this reset. Thank you for sharing this for all of us. I know I needed to hear it.
This is very timely for me as I told my husband that I need a break and that he he needed to care for the kids for the rest of the day. I totally agree that this is something that we all need. But I haven’t had a day off or any outside help since the beginning of the pandemic. I don’t know how to make this happen since I now have to take the weekend to prepare for the week, cooking, fixing things my kids broke, laundry, school planning, etc. Forget cleaning, bc that hasn’t happened since the beginning of school 5 weeks ago. Online schooling, work, and 3 young kids is just too much... and I too can’t rest if the house is a mess and what a disaster it is.,.
It’s all too much right now. Your desire to figure out a solution for your own self care is HUGE and I have confidence that you can figure out how to get some rest! I think it might be vital for you right now even if other things have to suffer. Good luck!!!! I’ve been where you are!
Joyful Living with Jen Lefforge Thank you, I did get away and did something for me. It was relaxing and re-energizing. Thanks for your videos. I feel like we have similar personalities and enjoy your perspective on things.
I’m reminded of a quote. May be from Rob Bell. Maybe he quoted someone else. But it’s something like, “Remember, you are a human being, not a human doing.”
When Marc started pastoring we quickly realized that Sundays would not be a Sabbath day so Mondays became my Sabbath day. I don't always remember to take it easy though. SMH I continue to work on it. LOL Thanks for the reminder.
While I do support taking a day off to be with your family (spend the day just focused on you by having a fun meal, park or movie day or a BBQ with friends) to relax and unwind while sharing quality time together, please also take a personal day or half day for you. I try to take 1-2 a day for me to do my nails, go for a walk on my own, get my hair done or just nap. I have a 5 year old and 2 year old and I work full time + my husband works shifts so some days it is hard to get that 1 hour in but I do my best to have at least 5 hours a week for me, myself and I with no children, no husband and MOST importantly, no CHORES to complete.
I absolutely do keep the Sabbath: sunset Friday to sunset Saturday. Though I'm not Jewish. Jen, it is absolutely a blessing. The rest gotten both spiritually and physically is amazing. And prepares me for the week ahead. As God means and meant it to be/do for us. Happy week, look forward to what you have for us next ♥️🙏😊
I think you mentioned in another video that you have two days off work. One for errands and cleaning and one “truly” off. That resonated with me. Preparing for the true day off is key. I got that nugget from you today. Lots to think about. Great video.
I’m so glad!! There’s also been seasons where I’ve taken the weekend chores and divided them up into the other days of the week if that’s more manageable but yes to intentionality!!!!❤️❤️❤️
Fabulous video!!!!!!! I nap every day as my “time off”. I definitely need it with our crazy, busy schedule! Makes me a better mom to have had some me time😍
You are absolutely right. This was important to hear. Maybe, down the road, you could do a follow up video sharing a little about how you would create time for sabbath even when the boys were in middle and upper grades. How did it change based on their school activities? I always appreciate your wisdom. Thank you for a great start to my day!
This was a great video as expected! I loved that you talked about preparing for the day off. I think that where I go wrong. I just want to stop and give up on house work or kids stuff after exhaustion instead of planning and making it a family affair. I think I shoot for this Sunday to be my day off. I would love to have a regular sabbath instead of 3 times a year.
Great video & it made me emotional. My son was born March 2nd of this year, my daughter was born Dec 2017. I genuinely don't know the last time I took a full day off... Going to have to try and implement this, i sure do need it!
I do the same thing. Being on salary, I’m always on the clock. But I try to do all my administration stuff on one day off, so the other day is free. But sometimes I slip and just work all the time. Lol. ❤️😘
Love love love this! I don’t usually take a full day off but at least half day a week or make sure to do something fun with my kids usually on saturdays
I can’t remember the last time I took a whole day off. Probably before I had my son, almost 7 years ago. I love this whole video and concept but my only stumbling block is how you would do this if you only have one day off of work? My husband regularly works six days a week so on Sunday he’s splitting his time between family time and getting things done like home projects and yard work. And yes, I know some things can be outsourced (but we’re only just getting to the point that we can afford a lawn service) but that doesn’t really help with all those random house projects that need to be taken care of. It would be hard for me to take Sunday off and do nothing when my husband is doing tasks after working upwards of 60 hours that week.
It's a great question and I think your only option would be to break up the chores into the other days so that you could at least get part of one day? This was our situation with Scott because as a pilot his schedule is all over the place so lots of the time we had to do it this way. And I'm so sorry your husband has to work those kinds of hours - it's not OK. But I would venture to say he would appreciate the "do nothing" day more than anyone in your home! Sounds like you both really need it!
Oh, and one more thing to add to my comment above: try to shift your thinking from it being a "do nothing" day to it being a day for taking care of your soul and spirit. They are every bit as important as the chores - actually, even more so.
Joyful Living with Jen Lefforge I figured Scott’s schedule has given you some experience with challenging work/life balance. I should have been more clear that it’s not like this all year long. 2020 has really messed with everything and the last six months have felt much longer, which doesn’t help. My husband is a CPA, so while he does work long hours most of the year, he does have a lot more flexibility than many people. If he needs to work late a couple nights a week to get everything done, he can decide which nights that is. If we have something going on Wednesday, then he doesn’t work late that night. So that is a benefit we don’t take for granted. And usually it’s only tax season he works Saturdays. But covid really affected accounts’ schedules this year. Thankfully now that we’re past the Sept 15th extension deadline, things should be better. I definitely think when he does have to work Saturdays that we can do more planning and pick the most important things to get done first and maybe give ourselves a time limit. Anything not done after that will have to wait and then switch to “time off.” I’ve been ruminating and thinking about how we can apply this to our lives. We definitely try to always do fun things with the kids and get some relaxation time but usually it feels like the to do list hangs over our heads. So being more intentional and setting time limits for the chores then switching to designated, guilt-free restoration time seems doable and like it would make a big difference for both of us.
My honeymoon a year and a half ago is the last time I had any time off! I haven’t even taken a real vacation since then because I work for my family business in a capacity that is 24/7 and all virtual so I always have to be available. No days off and even when I’m traveling I’m working. The burnout is real, I was supposed to have some real days off this year because I’d be cruising and actually unavailable but... yeah 2020. I want to at least try to build a day into my schedule where even though I’m available I’m at least able to get a bit of a break but I’m not actually sure how to accomplish that with the way my job works.
You need to get help from the family business to figure it out, Erin. Truly. The business will suffer if you're burned out and there really has to be a way for you to at least designate a few hours somewhere during the week!! I'm rooting for you!
I’m having to rethink my day off as it used to be with my husband we made a point of taking off to the park or coast or countryside or just sitting down together so venturing out on my own is scary as I was part of two for 44 years but I am making progress a bit at a time and when I get my pup in November we will be off together . Listening to you gives me confidence to say what I want now not what others want of me so thank you 😊
Norma you are going through a major life transition and I love that you’re figuring out how to make time for you in the new chapter! A beautiful way to honor yourself and your beautiful life!
I don't know how my mom did it when I was growing up. She worked full time and was taking classes part time (on and off) for 20 years. Meanwhile my dad had a full time job AND was a part time pastor, also while taking classes my whole life. He probably didn't get enough time off either, but I have vivid memories of cleaning and groceries on Saturdays with Mom and lots of church on Sundays. I guess we did nap on Sunday afternoon. 😜 Anyway all of that is to say I've had to train myself to consider downtime necessary. My husband has helped a lot with this. And even though my mom still works full time, she does a lot less on her weekends and we take her with us on all our vacations. I'm trying to help her make up for lost time. 😉
We really do tend to lean on how we were raised but in a way, your mom WAS doing it, just the church part was also work (which since I was a pastor for 10 years I TOTALLY GET). Love that you're not only figuring this out for your family but helping your mom find some rest as well! 😍
This is why I never ask a woman (especially a Mom) Do you work? Mom's and women are the hardest workers out there and with our time of the month all the time; I honestly don't know how we do it. We have this community pool. Some women love to talk there, I'm actually the opposite. That's where I just like to lay in the sun. and yes, DO NOTHING for awhile. For the short while that I get. It's true, it feels like you get to reset when you just can get a little time for yourself.
Great subject I have done this in the past to help me get the proper rest. What ages were your twins when you started this? I’m asking a friend just had twins and she seems to be busy they are still babies.
They were three when I started but the concept can be done at any time in regards to not doing chores and actual work aside from keeping the babies alive! I wish i had started when they were babies!
I didn’t think this video would apply to me because I have little kids but it was really interesting. Maybe in this crazy time we will try this discipline. Thanks!
Yup I was in the little kid stage when we started doing it!! Good luck and I hope you’re able to get some good down time!
I’m kind of speechless! As an Orthodox Jew, Shabbat has been a part of my life from birth. I am watching this while I’m cooking ahead for Rosh Hashana and chuckling because boy is it a lot of work to prepare for our precious days off! But the psychological benefit to knowing that you *can’t * be running around doing errands, cooking and cleaning or helping kids with schoolwork is priceless for the permission to recharge without guilt. Reading for pleasure, long read alouds to the kids, chatting with neighbors outside, long, lingering meals where we connect as a family, talking about Torah but also the world is a great vehicle for transmitting our values to our kids. And of course the time to take stock of ourselves and explore and reaffirm our connection to God. All of this contributes to our overall wellbeing. Thank you for putting this out there!
I’m so glad you chimed in here!! I had to laugh when people were commenting what a brilliant concept it is and I’m like yup wish I’d thought of it! Happy New Year and happy planning and prepping! I have so loved learning about so many Jewish holidays and traditions from dear friends and even been invited in on some - THE FOOD OMG!!!!!❤️❤️❤️❤️
Thank you so much for sharing your practice. I am a Sabbath Observant Orthodox Jew and I can’t tell you how much I look forward to a appreciate have a day off. To me the day is filled with self reflection, prayer, and most importantly QUALITY time with myself, my family and friends. We eat meals together, play board games, read books, and just generally take a break from the stresses of life.
I’d also recommend even if you aren’t religious having a day to unplug. Digital detox is so necessary and while I love how connected we all feel using our devices taking a day to make sure you focus on the people physically around you is so important.
Thank you SO MUCH for weighing in as I love hearing from those who practice and have found the benefit of it! I feel like it's so important for all humans!!
This is something we all need to do but don’t prioritize. I am certainly going to give myself permission this week to simply take a break. Thanks Jen!
I’m so glad I could remind you! It’s easy to work all the time because there’s always more to do to but it’s vital!
So many great points, Jen! Our society is so bad about taking time off. We loved that about our recent trip to Colorado. It was so much unlike a Disney trip where it’s a lot of go, go, go. It was relaxing and EXACTLY what we needed!
Yes to unstructured downtime! It takes some getting used to but the rewards are so worth it!
I'm a SAHM whose kids are off to college. My hubby is a very busy attorney (read: workaholic). My time is largely my own. Like someone else commented, I feel like I need to be intentional with my time. I occasionally claim what I call 'a lazy day'. I need to reframe that thought into restorative and actively practice that concept. This vlog resonates, Jen. Thank you!
No matter how busy or not busy I am, I don’t do well when the days just run together. I think most of us are that way, Beth!
Do you ever know something is true but really just need someone to be straight with you and TELL YOU? That’s what this entire thing is for me. I know I need to do it, and we SORT OF do, but I need to be intentional. Right now Sunday is the only day of the week that all of us are home and not supposed to be working at our jobs, so we always feel guilty not working on house projects and getting stuff done. But we do need the rest. The idea of really preparing to take a full day of proper rest is really the shift in mindset that I think we need to work on at our house!
It has two benefits, really, because not only do you get that full day to rest it REALLY gets your motivated to get the work done! Either in the other weekend day or spread out throughout the week. I hope this works amazingly well for you, Susan, and you find yourself enjoying every minute of that rest day!
Joyful Living with Jen Lefforge thats really it, is getting that motivation to get SO MUCH DONE the other days so I can be intentionally restful on a particular day. Now we’re in a cycle where I’m not very intentional about the rest time, so I end up feeling lazy and guilty for resting!
Also I feel VERY called out (in a good way/this is important way) about the idea of spiraling into martyrdom when you feel like every day needs to be go go go. Hiiiii it’s me. 🤗
Yes. I see you.🤣🥰❤️
This topic on the surface seems like it's a no brainer and easy, but it's crazy how incredibly HARD it is to relax and slow down for a brief minute!! THANK YOU FOR THIS VIDEO, didn't realize how much I needed this
It is SO INCREDIBLY HARD. It take discipline and a lot of practice! Which seems counter-intuitive (like, shouldn't we be able to just, um, relax??).
@@JoyfulLivingwithJenLefforge i know right!!
Love Love Love Love this. Back in the day when dinosaurs roamed the earth and I was a single parent of three, the "girls" and I would always call Sundays "brushing your hair and teeth optional" days. We Loved to watch "B" grade movies and eat food out of cans. LOL When I met "happily ever after husband" and we had "the teenage boy" I've forgotten how incredibly important this is. I so appreciate this Jen, you are the BEST. In this "time of great unpleasantness" this couldn't be any more important. Tremendous concept!!!!!
I’m so glad you liked it! And gosh how I wish i could take credit for it, but it’s truly an ancient practice and one I think all humans need!! Thanks, Carrie!
The Jewish perspective on Sabbath is admirable. I’m going to do my best to incorporate this into my life.
It’s hard to express in a 12 minute video what embracing it did for me, mentally and spiritually! But it takes some trial and error and discipline. In other words, learning to rest well is a lot of work. But worth it!
I am notorious in my family for getting “Sunday Blues” if I do all my work on Saturday because then I feel lazy and bored on Sunday.
I am terrible at relaxing. I don’t enjoy it. I enjoy being productive. I have found a few things (listening to a podcast while doing a paint by number or going for a walk around the neighborhood, for example) which I can count as both, thus convincing myself to “relax” but, for the most part I feel happier when I am getting something done.
I like the concept of what you’re saying, but I’m thinking about what it would look like for me.
You may want to try just for half a day - it really can be something that needs to be practiced! I get it!
I've commented this on here and Instagram multiple times, but seriously, thank you for being the mentor I need!
I quit working when I had our oldest son 6 years ago to be able to raise him. Now we have an almost 4 year old and a 3rd due in 8 weeks! I find myself with no days off (husband in airline industry) and begging for one in my head. But as you stated, I don't even know what I would do for restoring time. If I'm at a doctors appointment without my kids, I'm thinking and worrying the whole time. My life has become them and I'm not complaining about that. I love it. But I would also love something of my own. This has given me so much to think on and plan for. Thank you. ♥️
Lydia, find those things for you NOW. Those littles will be grown and gone in the blink of an eye and maintaining your own identity is SO IMPORTANT for your emotional health! And I'm honored that you see me that way, thank you!❤️
I try to take my day off on Saturday. I am committed to & active in my church, so Sunday tends to be a little hectic. That day off is important! Sometimes, it's half Saturday, half Sunday! You know, life happens! 😅
It absolutely does, Joy, and I for sure don’t get it right all the time! But it’s always worth the effort.❤️
I have done this for years. For me the day of the week would vary but if I didn't have a do nothing day then I was miserable and exhausted. Sometimes it was just a half day but with four kids and their activities and my own commitments it was better than nothing! My kids are grown so I get a lot of do nothing days now.😊
It really is a game changer, isn’t it?
As a person who works in a church it’s very important to find a different day during the week to be Sabbath, not the day you work in the church, because you need the downtime to restore yourself. Thank you for the video!
Yup! Did that for 10 years and sunday was anything BUT a rest day!❤️
I love this video!! We can't make it work these days at our house with littles with special needs because of their daily therapy schedules - BUT, that doesn't mean we don't try! So, everything you say completely applies - it just means that the result isn't necessarily a 'day off' but instead, an afternoon off, or an hour off, or just some quiet time. And, no joke, when things start to feel a little overwhelming, my husband and I still say to each other 'at least it's not twins'! 😄 I dunno how all y'all twins parents manage!
Yes do what you can and make that space! In your case especially, you need to find that time where it fits.
The best purchase I ever made as a mom was a hammock. Lying in it means I can’t do anything else. I might play some chill 70s music or listen to the birds, but mostly I just stare up into the trees and feel small in the universe (in a positive way). It puts my life into perspective and recharges me.
Yes it’s all about regaining perspective! Love that!
This is a great idea, Jen, I also think that, when working from home, there is a 'guilt' attached when you do take some time for your self. its so easy not to have clear working time.
Steve it’s so true!! The time is less structured so it’s easy to just let work time turn into all the time. That doesn’t work for me as I tend to be a workaholic, so it’s a necessary thing to set aside the time!
I take a day off every weekend, with the exception of this past weekend when my husband went hunting and I cleaned (because I always clean to keep my mind busy when he’s gone). Instead I took yesterday off, and it was awesome. I have been having some issues with my mental health as of recently, mainly with anxiety, and I know I can’t skip having intentional down time.
(warning my pastor is going to come out with this statement;): I truly believe we were DESIGNED to need rest (beyond just sleeping) and that we cannot human correctly if we don't lean into that. I take it VERY serious, especially from a mental health perspective, because I have tried living without it and it wasn't pretty. AT ALL.
Joyful Living with Jen Lefforge my dad is a pastor, I’m used to the pastor coming out on the regular 😂 (I always know I’m about to get a personal sermon when a sentence starts off with either “you know I love you buddy....” or “let me tell you a little about something....”). I really do we can’t human without rest, and I have really learned that the hard way. Grateful for an understanding family, even if my husband still has a hard time with the actual resting on his part.
I love this idea.
It's a good one! Wish I'd been the one to come up with it!😂❤️❤️
Wow, does this resonate for me or what?! This concept will change everything...definitely need to and will do this. Sunday is my day this week and I'm looking forward to this reset. Thank you for sharing this for all of us. I know I needed to hear it.
Yeah I almost told you to watch it but didn’t want to be a bossy pants.😂
Oh wow, eye opener there... I seriously never really thought about this. This was a very inspiring video, Jen. Thank you!
Such an inspiring video. I’ve watched this 10 times. (On a side note...love that top! You wear it well. )
This is very timely for me as I told my husband that I need a break and that he he needed to care for the kids for the rest of the day. I totally agree that this is something that we all need. But I haven’t had a day off or any outside help since the beginning of the pandemic. I don’t know how to make this happen since I now have to take the weekend to prepare for the week, cooking, fixing things my kids broke, laundry, school planning, etc. Forget cleaning, bc that hasn’t happened since the beginning of school 5 weeks ago. Online schooling, work, and 3 young kids is just too much... and I too can’t rest if the house is a mess and what a disaster it is.,.
It’s all too much right now. Your desire to figure out a solution for your own self care is HUGE and I have confidence that you can figure out how to get some rest! I think it might be vital for you right now even if other things have to suffer. Good luck!!!! I’ve been where you are!
Joyful Living with Jen Lefforge Thank you, I did get away and did something for me. It was relaxing and re-energizing. Thanks for your videos. I feel like we have similar personalities and enjoy your perspective on things.
I’m reminded of a quote. May be from Rob Bell. Maybe he quoted someone else. But it’s something like, “Remember, you are a human being, not a human doing.”
Love Rob Bell. Thanks for watching!
When Marc started pastoring we quickly realized that Sundays would not be a Sabbath day so Mondays became my Sabbath day. I don't always remember to take it easy though. SMH I continue to work on it. LOL Thanks for the reminder.
Which may explain why I was so off yesterday 🤣🤣🤦🏾♀️
Absolutely my pleasure, Friend. We were made to need that time off. When we don't do it, it's not pretty (at least that's how it works for me!)
Best video, Jen! Thanks! Amazing sweater, too! I will get off the errand hamster wheel Sundays and plan some family games.
Baby steps can get you all the way there, Maria!! Thanks for watching!
I am going to watch this video on repeat until I get better at this!!!
Hurray!! Once I got into the rhythm of it, it truly became VITAL. You’ll find yourself looking forward to it all week!!!
While I do support taking a day off to be with your family (spend the day just focused on you by having a fun meal, park or movie day or a BBQ with friends) to relax and unwind while sharing quality time together, please also take a personal day or half day for you. I try to take 1-2 a day for me to do my nails, go for a walk on my own, get my hair done or just nap. I have a 5 year old and 2 year old and I work full time + my husband works shifts so some days it is hard to get that 1 hour in but I do my best to have at least 5 hours a week for me, myself and I with no children, no husband and MOST importantly, no CHORES to complete.
Absolutely! Great point, Kari!
5 star advice as always, Jen. So glad to “know” you.
Thank you so much, Jenna! (Btw I love your name as that was what my family called me growing up and what my husband still calls me❤️)
Joyful Living with Jen Lefforge I’m Jennifer, too.
I absolutely do keep the Sabbath: sunset Friday to sunset Saturday. Though I'm not Jewish. Jen, it is absolutely a blessing. The rest gotten both spiritually and physically is amazing. And prepares me for the week ahead. As God means and meant it to be/do for us. Happy week, look forward to what you have for us next ♥️🙏😊
It just gives you a fresh start, doesn’t it? Love that!
I think you mentioned in another video that you have two days off work. One for errands and cleaning and one “truly” off. That resonated with me. Preparing for the true day off is key. I got that nugget from you today. Lots to think about. Great video.
I’m so glad!! There’s also been seasons where I’ve taken the weekend chores and divided them up into the other days of the week if that’s more manageable but yes to intentionality!!!!❤️❤️❤️
Fabulous video!!!!!!! I nap every day as my “time off”. I definitely need it with our crazy, busy schedule! Makes me a better mom to have had some me time😍
Bring in all the naps!!!!
I haven’t taken a day off in about two years. You are make some great points. This Sunday I am going to make sure I have a day of rest.
It’s such a game changer, Ashlyn!! You absolutely need it and i hope you enjoy every minute- it isn’t selfish it’s smart!
You are absolutely right. This was important to hear. Maybe, down the road, you could do a follow up video sharing a little about how you would create time for sabbath even when the boys were in middle and upper grades. How did it change based on their school activities? I always appreciate your wisdom. Thank you for a great start to my day!
I will absolutely do that!! Thanks, Jennifer!!
I love this concept. I will make an effort to try it.
Good luck, Trish!!
This was a great video as expected! I loved that you talked about preparing for the day off. I think that where I go wrong. I just want to stop and give up on house work or kids stuff after exhaustion instead of planning and making it a family affair. I think I shoot for this Sunday to be my day off. I would love to have a regular sabbath instead of 3 times a year.
Yes you absolutely have to plan for it or it just doesn’t happen! Thanks for watching, Jaime.❤️
My Sabbath is on Sunday.....Mass then rest....
Great video & it made me emotional. My son was born March 2nd of this year, my daughter was born Dec 2017. I genuinely don't know the last time I took a full day off... Going to have to try and implement this, i sure do need it!
Yes you do, Celene!! I’m rooting for you!!
I do the same thing. Being on salary, I’m always on the clock. But I try to do all my administration stuff on one day off, so the other day is free. But sometimes I slip and just work all the time. Lol. ❤️😘
Major stop that!🤣❤️❤️❤️
Love love love this! I don’t usually take a full day off but at least half day a week or make sure to do something fun with my kids usually on saturdays
I found my kids really loved our day off! It meant i wasn’t multi tasking and we could all really relax!❤️
Great advice for my birthday today. This really makes me think about myself which does not happen much!! Thanks.
Gina, Happy Birthday! I’m honored to be a small part of it. ❤️❤️❤️
Up early this morning Jen
❤️I wanted this one out for the early risers - they may be the ones most in need of it!
I realized yesterday that one of the things I miss is just getting out and taking photos. I'm going to make some time for it this fall.
Good! Finding time to do things you love is maybe more important now than it ever was.😍
I can’t remember the last time I took a whole day off. Probably before I had my son, almost 7 years ago. I love this whole video and concept but my only stumbling block is how you would do this if you only have one day off of work? My husband regularly works six days a week so on Sunday he’s splitting his time between family time and getting things done like home projects and yard work. And yes, I know some things can be outsourced (but we’re only just getting to the point that we can afford a lawn service) but that doesn’t really help with all those random house projects that need to be taken care of. It would be hard for me to take Sunday off and do nothing when my husband is doing tasks after working upwards of 60 hours that week.
It's a great question and I think your only option would be to break up the chores into the other days so that you could at least get part of one day? This was our situation with Scott because as a pilot his schedule is all over the place so lots of the time we had to do it this way. And I'm so sorry your husband has to work those kinds of hours - it's not OK. But I would venture to say he would appreciate the "do nothing" day more than anyone in your home! Sounds like you both really need it!
Oh, and one more thing to add to my comment above: try to shift your thinking from it being a "do nothing" day to it being a day for taking care of your soul and spirit. They are every bit as important as the chores - actually, even more so.
Joyful Living with Jen Lefforge I figured Scott’s schedule has given you some experience with challenging work/life balance. I should have been more clear that it’s not like this all year long. 2020 has really messed with everything and the last six months have felt much longer, which doesn’t help. My husband is a CPA, so while he does work long hours most of the year, he does have a lot more flexibility than many people. If he needs to work late a couple nights a week to get everything done, he can decide which nights that is. If we have something going on Wednesday, then he doesn’t work late that night. So that is a benefit we don’t take for granted. And usually it’s only tax season he works Saturdays. But covid really affected accounts’ schedules this year. Thankfully now that we’re past the Sept 15th extension deadline, things should be better.
I definitely think when he does have to work Saturdays that we can do more planning and pick the most important things to get done first and maybe give ourselves a time limit. Anything not done after that will have to wait and then switch to “time off.” I’ve been ruminating and thinking about how we can apply this to our lives. We definitely try to always do fun things with the kids and get some relaxation time but usually it feels like the to do list hangs over our heads. So being more intentional and setting time limits for the chores then switching to designated, guilt-free restoration time seems doable and like it would make a big difference for both of us.
My honeymoon a year and a half ago is the last time I had any time off! I haven’t even taken a real vacation since then because I work for my family business in a capacity that is 24/7 and all virtual so I always have to be available. No days off and even when I’m traveling I’m working. The burnout is real, I was supposed to have some real days off this year because I’d be cruising and actually unavailable but... yeah 2020. I want to at least try to build a day into my schedule where even though I’m available I’m at least able to get a bit of a break but I’m not actually sure how to accomplish that with the way my job works.
You need to get help from the family business to figure it out, Erin. Truly. The business will suffer if you're burned out and there really has to be a way for you to at least designate a few hours somewhere during the week!! I'm rooting for you!
Love this video-especially your notes about preparing for the day off. Am definitely going to have to give this a try!
I'm so glad you enjoyed it, Carley! Happy Day Off Planning!
I’m having to rethink my day off as it used to be with my husband we made a point of taking off to the park or coast or countryside or just sitting down together so venturing out on my own is scary as I was part of two for 44 years but I am making progress a bit at a time and when I get my pup in November we will be off together . Listening to you gives me confidence to say what I want now not what others want of me so thank you 😊
Norma you are going through a major life transition and I love that you’re figuring out how to make time for you in the new chapter! A beautiful way to honor yourself and your beautiful life!
I don't know how my mom did it when I was growing up. She worked full time and was taking classes part time (on and off) for 20 years. Meanwhile my dad had a full time job AND was a part time pastor, also while taking classes my whole life. He probably didn't get enough time off either, but I have vivid memories of cleaning and groceries on Saturdays with Mom and lots of church on Sundays. I guess we did nap on Sunday afternoon. 😜 Anyway all of that is to say I've had to train myself to consider downtime necessary. My husband has helped a lot with this. And even though my mom still works full time, she does a lot less on her weekends and we take her with us on all our vacations. I'm trying to help her make up for lost time. 😉
We really do tend to lean on how we were raised but in a way, your mom WAS doing it, just the church part was also work (which since I was a pastor for 10 years I TOTALLY GET). Love that you're not only figuring this out for your family but helping your mom find some rest as well! 😍
This is why I never ask a woman (especially a Mom) Do you work? Mom's and women are the hardest workers out there and with our time of the month all the time; I honestly don't know how we do it. We have this community pool. Some women love to talk there, I'm actually the opposite. That's where I just like to lay in the sun. and yes, DO NOTHING for awhile. For the short while that I get. It's true, it feels like you get to reset when you just can get a little time for yourself.
We all need that!! So true, Kim!
Great subject I have done this in the past to help me get the proper rest. What ages were your twins when you started this? I’m asking a friend just had twins and she seems to be busy they are still babies.
They were three when I started but the concept can be done at any time in regards to not doing chores and actual work aside from keeping the babies alive! I wish i had started when they were babies!
Joyful Living with Jen Lefforge thanks!
Me to my self-employed blogger wife: Oh, boop, you should watch this...
Wife: Wait, I need to finish this post.
#irony 😄
Yup that sounds about right....🤣🤣🤣❤️