Intrapersonal Communication
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- čas přidán 19. 08. 2014
- theKalapa.com
Transcription of this video (edited and revised):
Intrapersonal Communication - Edited and Revised Transcript
by Alan Seid
Hi, this is Alan Seid with Cascadia Workshops and the Blackbelt Communication Skills online learning program.
So much of the time in my workshops, with my clients, my work is about interpersonal communication, communication between people.
The topic of intrapersonal communication is absolutely essential.
If you think about it, what gets in the way of me being honest with you, with me being transparent with you, one of the limiting factors is how connected I am with myself. If I don’t even know what’s going on inside me, how can I possibly share honestly what’s going on for me, if I have no idea?
Likewise, if I’m on the listening side of things, if I’m trying to be present, what gets in the way of me being able to be present is if I have too much going on for me.
How I connect with what’s happening inside me and how I communicate is really essential.
Intrapersonal communication becomes essential for the interpersonal communication.
So often we find that how we communicate with ourselves is how we communicate with each other and how we treat each other.
In my workshops I often ask, "OK, when you feel like you’re less than perfect, when you feel like you totally screwed up, how do you talk to yourself?" And we write them down on a board. What we find is that people are brutal with themselves. We tend to really judge and criticize ourselves when we do something that appears to be a mistake or when we messed up.
We get to work with that by transforming the way we speak to ourselves. We’re not trying to get rid of the judgments, but if we can connect with the life energy beneath them, the feeling and the needs, we can begin to transform the ways that we talk to ourselves in order to be healthier and more life serving.
Feelings and Needs Vocabulary Contributes to Healthier Intrapersonal Communication
One of the things that I find really helps in my intrapersonal communication, and also in the interpersonal communication, is developing a vocabulary around feelings and needs.
So often I have something happening inside of me. Some kind of feeling or energy and I don’t even have the words for it. If I don’t have the words for it, it’s going to make it very, very difficult for me to describe to you what it is that’s happening inside me.
We can use words as windows or as walls. I can use my words to block you out and not give you access to what’s happening inside me.
With feelings and needs vocabulary I can use words more as windows and try to give you access to what my interior experience is.
Likewise, I might be able to more easily access what your interior experience is and ...
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800 views? this video is sincerely more valuable than 80% of youtube videos. Very nice explanation on intrapersonal communication!
+Albert Sutanto (Aps) I was moved to read your words!
As of this comment it now has about 2,500 views!
Yesterday my 8-year-old was watching two kids having a food fight (hard for me on so many levels, including wasting food and time!)... and that video had over 14,000,000 views!
Comments like yours help to keep me going!
+Alan Seid dont do it for the views. do it because you believe what youre doing is a great deed, and keep up the good work!
6108, one year later! :-)
I want to have a black belt in communication!!! A helpful video indeed.
I love this video. A friend of mine is having trouble with interpersonal relationships, and I recommended he add learning on intrapersonal relationships to his research. I watched this and recommended it. I studied communication in college years ago, and really, this is a very informative 101 style presentation on the topic. Good job.
Great work, I'm showing this breakdown of interpersonal communication to high school students! Very sincere, simple, and direct.
+Topher Barrett Thank you! I'm glad you liked it. I'd be curious to think what your students take away from it.
Clarity inside = Clarity outside. Love this ! Thank you !
+Nitiraj Daby Thank you!!
nice.. The idea of me looking at myself in the mirror that was nice
Thanks so much for this video. Im school for Communications and just started my Theory and Practice course literally like yesterday this video has helped me get a jumpstart I look forward to checking out more and the link for your site for my own encouragement. Thanks Lisa
Wow. That is fantastic!
Just learning about this in my Comms class, which I love because I always get lost in my own mind and learning to focus my thoughts to be able to communicate better in person but it all starts with oneself. Understand yourself and you'll see what you can work on.
Personally, if I saw that guy flick his cigarette at the gas pump, I wouldn't say anything at all because I'm sure this man already knows not to do that and most likely just doesn't care, I doubt he's that stupid to not understand to not to have a cigarette near fuel pumps. Also, if a family gets blown up, I wouldn't take it as my fault for not saying anything but that man's fault for being a jackass.
A better example would be me talking a buddy out of drinking and driving.
I use words & numbers 10 sad etc especially in this modern world where the person you’re communicating with cannot see you a lot of the time or doesn’t know you well enough to have a theory of mind or history of your life
Having this attitude while trying to have a person in your life is unhealthy. We all must be ourselves and bring that to our partners. Especially when we are a bit narcissistic and empathetic.. I'm learning to keep my self in check. For 2 years, and along comes the sun man and fucks it all up..how by showing me all his insecurities thru a interpersonal relationships.. I tried to get rid of this guy. But one thing
he could not remember one small detail I had mentioned to him. My empathy is hugely strong to the point
Of reading just not feelings and body, but the fricken mind..I had to walk away from this guy he was totally toxic.. He wanted me to see how damaged he was. When I showed him my imperfections he totally lost all worth in me. But that was not who I was. It was who I left behind. And when we spoke Of the cavern that I had fallen into from my ex. He was a bit taken aback ..I could see. I explained to him those past things and wanted to move forward, but the hole in his soul WAs so maddened with revenge. He was ugly, rude. Mean and not responsive to his own actions, nevertheless his intra relationship he had built with me. A willing partner does not do nonverbal thought. And when your so into itself u can't speak a yes or a no. Well then time to go. When u say I'm here in all ways for you to grow urself and help each other, and your rejected. Knowing its not going to that place already and you can't be honest then. Time to go. Told him all he wanted to hear and left door open. Hope he does NOT knock but if he does. I will be gentle and honest. This guy is was, will, still be, messed up for a long time. He needed help and your channel is a good place for him to be. Hopefully when he finds her that one. She will not be treated as a revenge mark AS so many this guy had before. This is not the proper way to grow. But narcissus have to learn the hard way.
"How do i develop my interpersonal skills?" Anybody can help me answer this?
The link is not live: "This page isn't live yet
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Sooo good
“talking to oneself is actually a skill you can enhance for specific job” can someone explain this to me????
It's very good
Thank you, and you're welcome. ;-)
Are there STAGES OF INTRAPERSONAL COMMUNICATION???
Great question!
I suppose like anything else that we get better at you could identify "stages" of improvement.
But I don't know of any developmental framework for intra-personal communication based on actual research.
Who else from Professor Robles' class?
Here :)