God Will Make Me Marry Someone I'm Not Attracted To ( Christian Single Fears)
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- čas přidán 28. 11. 2020
- Hope this video encourages you as you consider praying for your future spouse, below I've included verses that will help navigate the type of person you should be looking for, including someone that you're attracted to!
Do not let your adornment be merely outward-arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel- rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God. For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in God also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands,
I Peter 3:3-5
But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look at his appearance or at his physical stature, because I have refused him. For the Lord does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”
I Samuel 16:7
Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy-meditate on these things.
Philippians 4:8
“Blessed are the poor in spirit, For theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are the meek, For they shall inherit the earth. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, For they shall be filled. Blessed are the merciful, For they shall obtain mercy. Blessed are the pure in heart, For they shall see God. Blessed are the peacemakers, For they shall be called sons of God. Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, For theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Matthew 5:3, 5-10
Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies. The heart of her husband safely trusts her; So he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil All the days of her life. She seeks wool and flax, And willingly works with her hands. She is like the merchant ships, She brings her food from afar. She also rises while it is yet night, And provides food for her household, And a portion for her maidservants. She considers a field and buys it; From her profits she plants a vineyard. She girds herself with strength, And strengthens her arms. She perceives that her merchandise is good, And her lamp does not go out by night. She stretches out her hands to the distaff, And her hand holds the spindle. She extends her hand to the poor, Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy. She is not afraid of snow for her household, For all her household is clothed with scarlet. She makes tapestry for herself; Her clothing is fine linen and purple. Her husband is known in the gates, When he sits among the elders of the land. She makes linen garments and sells them, And supplies sashes for the merchants. Strength and honor are her clothing; She shall rejoice in time to come. She opens her mouth with wisdom, And on her tongue is the law of kindness. She watches over the ways of her household, And does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children rise up and call her blessed; Her husband also, and he praises her: “Many daughters have done well, But you excel them all.” Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, But a woman who fears the Lord , she shall be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands, And let her own works praise her in the gates.
Proverbs 31:10-31
#marrysomeoneimnotattractedto #datingadvice #christiansingle
A fear that I haven’t verbalized before but really strongly bothers me
Thank you for sharing, I would verbalize it to God. Let Him know your heart, He loves you and wants you to run to Him with your deep fears 🤍
Same here
I cant imagine marrying someone i do not like and not attracted to. There would be no sex life. I work out too so i hope God brings me a man who works out because i can't imagine marrying a man who is fat and doesn't care about his health. That's a NO for me.
Ha ha ha, I wish the women at my church were like you. None of the women at my church work out or at least they don't appear to. And I work out very seriously so it's important. I need a fit gym wife. 💪
@ModelJames13 Our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit. We absolutely should work out and care about what food we eat. Glad you take care of yourself. How can we be a blessing and serve others when we don't even take care of ourselves? I always encourage women to eat healthy and work out. Better ourselves, spiritually, mentally, and physically.
God didn’t give us free will for no reason.
Amen!
There is absolutely zero reason to marry someone you're not attracted to. Sure, he doesn't have to be conventionally attractive but you should feel attracted to him on some level physically. You need to feel attracted to your life partner in a marriage. That's point number one. Point number two is that nobody is required to marry anybody. If you don't feel like you want someone to be your husband, regardless of the reason, you DO NOT have to marry him.
I agree 😊
We are humans, we are not animals. God gave us this feeling of attraction for a reason ! It's not just physical attraction, it's also mental and many other things :)
I agree 😊
Definitely one of my biggest fears
Thank you for sharing, praying against this fear for you. That you will be encouraged God will place someone that you're attracted to in your life. God is the good gift giver
Physical attraction matters on account that a lack therof can lead to philandering eyes, which can lead to adlultery .
Thank you for this. Me personally, I can’t marry someone I’m not attracted to. I Won’t be able to truly enjoy physical pleasure/intimacy with someone who I don’t really like and want for real.
Absolutely, Brittney thank you for watching and sharing your thoughts, I agree with you.
There's a book that I'm currently leading a group of young ladies through called "Sacred Search" it's a really great read for dating God's way.
Same here!! I just can’t…
Thank you for posting this... This has been a concern. It would be very hard to devote myself to someone I wasn't attracted to. It's not just looks. It's a full package experience we both want on each end. ❤
Welcome to the channel Autumn, thank you for sharing your concerns. I would highly recommend reading "Sacred Search" by Gary Thomas this book really explains what God has for us in dating. It's the best book that I've ever read on dating and I've read many.
@@169provebs aww thank you so much!
I love it when i see Christian channels. When i hear people talk about Jesus. Thanks for this. ❤
Absolutely, thanks for watching and for sharing 🙏
God doesn't make us marry someone we are not attracted to. He changes what attracts us. Also, joy and happiness, which comes with having faith, has a way of making people more attractive in every way. What I consider to be attractive today has changed drastically since finding Jesus.
God doesn't changes what attracts us., because if it comes from God you are not going to be attracted to their behavior if it's ungodly. Every one have a type. If you're attracted to an attractive person it's OK to want that it's long it's aligned with God.
Thank you so much I really needed this video. There is a guy that likes me and I really don’t like him back like that.
Absolutely!
I think we can carry alot of unnecessary guilt over something that we shouldn't feel guilty about. God wants us to be full of joy and peace. I'm praying for your future husband ❤️
Same here…I have a feeling this dude likes me & I’m not interested. I really needed this video.
23 single here, spoke with this girl for over a year, Just to get to know her we made Good connections and started talking about deeper things, especially about God. Asked her out in the end and she said no... That left a hole in me till this day.
Welcome to the channel 👋
Thank you for sharing your story. I want to first say that I respect you for "shooting your shot".. Way too many men, stay in the friend zone because they don't have enough courage to say what they feel. We need more men who are courageous, who go after what they want. I want to encourage you, that you did the right thing, she just wasn't interested in you that way.
Just because she wasn't interested in you in a romantic way, that doesn't mean you're a failure or that God doesn't have someone for you. God loves you and He has His best for you, as believers we have to ground ourselves in the truth of God's Character. The enemy wants us to stay in sadness, defeat and hurt. But, God has healing for us, He has victory for us. I want to encourage you to give God your broken pieces and ask Him to heal your heart. I love reading through the Psalms in times of sadness, because it shows the relationship that God desires with us. Keep fighting, God's with you.
@@169provebs thanks for this, sorry took a long time to acknowledge this.
Thank you. This help me.
Absolutely! Praise God!
this is a huge fear of mines! had a dream with a women who I am not attracted at all and in this dream a we where waiting on a line for a service and a pastor came to us and said are you and your wife coming in?!! and ive also have had huge weird confirmations....now im petrified that this is God because of the dreams and confirmation....Now i feel forced to pursue a relationship with this women. pray for me
I would encourage you that God does not lead us in fear. He leads us in peace. He hasn't given us a spirit of fear, not every dream is from God and not every confirmation is from God. The Bible says to test the spirits and I'd encourage you to test everything dreams, confirmations, words from others all against the word of God. Me personally as a female would NOT want a man to persue me if he felt forced by a dream to persue me. That's just a recipe for disaster. I'd trust that God has His best for you, He will lead you to a women who you are absolutely excited about! Keep waiting and praying for her. God's with you in the waiting.
@@169provebs thanks Ashley for you encouragement ! Blessing to you and the family.
I’m 47 , still never married although I always wanted to and even now that is a fear of mine , that IF He sends someone into my life , that it will be a Christian but someone I want to throw up when I look at him or cringe when I think of even having to hold his hand and beyond . That it will be some kind of test for me to see how “unshallow” and godly I am and if I don’t happily accept that person as my spouse , that it will mean I’m a superficial and unholy and not wanting to please God and that it must mean I’m so ungrateful .
Wow, I really resignate with this a lot! It seems that alot of men seem to let themselves go as they get older and this is a serious fear. But, one thing I have to remember is God created me and He has made me very passionate about fitness. I don't think God wants us to settle for someone that doesn't take care of themselves or that we're not attracted to. I'm praying God will bring you a man who you get excited about🤍
I'm also a Christian yay still single in my Christian faith if it's meant to be I will leave that up to the holy spirit amen ✝️☦️🙏🌅✝️🔥🔥🔥🇭🇲🇱🇷
Grace builds on nature ,, the attraction and the desire Is not shallow it’s how God speaks to the heart and helps you choose. Attraction is not everything for sure but important to get the ball rolling to see and appreciate the beauty of the other in their totality
It's too late for us.
I don't think "physical" attraction is as important as we in the west think, however.... if you are not attracted to a person, as in you would not be happy to be with them and give them your best, it would be sin, to knowingly burden them with that unhappiness or incontinence, resentment regardless of the reason being physical or otherwise. How is it a sin you ask? It breaks the golden rule Luke 6:31 -"Do to others as you would have them do to you". That person would also be in sin desiring you to be bound to them if they knew you would not be happy or even content with them. We would be wise to remain single if for some reason we were unhappy with potential prospects and I think many Christians need to realize this. Nothing wrong with it. I do think our ideas about how attraction works is warped though,. Our physical attraction value system can be affected by all sorts of outer and inner influences outside of God. Like media, social media, corn, hollywood, novels, where we grow up etc. Even the weight we put on the physical is likely influenced by the time in which we live rather than God per say.
Biblically when it hit me was seeing Paul tell Christian women to let their beauty come from within rather than without. Now we men are visual creatures, so he could have said wear hairstyles that show the beauty you were blessed with, be not ashamed or keep it fit and tight (not saying its not a good thing to be fit) it does say physical exercise profits! Albeit a little (1 Timothy 4:8). Would God lead the Christian women astray with his advice? Well the more I grew in Christ the more my attraction value system changed. My realization of what marriage actually is as well. So the suggested way to be as Paul described for women, that bait would draw me in to pursue. Also the things that I would have thought to be basic or bare minimum as they say now have actually become the rare gems I would be looking for in a woman if I was currently seeking to be married.
All in all I would say we should focus less on the fear of what level of attraction we get to "feel" and receive for ourselves and focus more on whether we can give them the level of appreciation love and affection we would want for ourselves. It should be obvious if we are not attracted, to a potential spouse, meaning if we can not see ourselves giving them the love Christ gives the church (i speak as a man here) the Christian thing to do would be to remain single unless I can find someone I want to do that for because Christ did not lay down his life resentfully or begrudgingly but willingly. Again I'm not advocating for vanity, though we all have some level of it. I am saying if you value something so much, whether its physical beauty, height, curves , physical purity, finances, or anything. If the person does not have it , you want it, and it would hinder you from following Gods commands, with a willful and content heart, it would be a hellish thing to do to that person to marry them knowing that.
Thank you for sharing, welcome to the channel 👋 great insights!
My parents are also forcing me to marry a guy whom I am not attracted with, i even had conversation with him,but i dint feel anything attractive. I know that he is a good guy , however I make up my mind to say yes, but my heart saying no , don't. I am confused, please guide me
anything that rushes you is not from God, wait, pray and wait to feel the peace of God. this is alife time decision dont be in hurry.
Praying for wisdom, I'd never recommend marrying someone just because others want you to, that is not from God. Praying He gives you strength to stand up for yourself against the pressure of your family.
Why ask here? Ask God!
I tried going on dates with someone that I wasn't attracted to and after the second time. I just couldn't do it anymore because he was extremely overweight and too much of a nice guy where I saw him get really disrespected. Dating someone you're not attracted to just leads to nowhere but disappointment. If there is some attraction then I can work on that but if there is none then that is not something I can work on... I told him after the date that it wasn't going to work and he was actually pretty cool about it. I know that I can have a huge attraction to someone but it doesn't mean I will go after them because I do not qualify for those guys and some of them are usually not very good people. A person can be a 9 in looks but if they are dumb, self-centered and has rotten personality that I can't respect then I rather just move on from him. But let's not ignore that women can also be this way as well. I think what it comes down to is that you have to have a balance of both physical and mental attraction and one without the other it usually does not work. I rather be single than to have a divorce in my record. I recognize that I have a lot to work on and that's why I am in no rush to date and I will date when I'm ready. When I do decide to date again, it will be with a purpose.
That's such a great reflection, thank you for sharing your story. Welcome to the channel 👋 😀
The guy i'm with is physically attractive but because he owns his own place, I've been able to get a sneak peak at how he lives and I really cannot see myself with him long term. I would get frustrated and really don't want to marry someone just to be a mum figure. I don't know if things are just typical for men or if he really should have developed some better habits by now. I don't imagine much changing at 35. He has some nice character traits but I noticed that I am not drawn to want to be very affectionate and it does feel like we're are just hanging out as friends. There isn't much romance there... Can anyone relate?
Hi, Amy for some reason I'm just now getting this comment, but one thing I'd encourage you to read "The Sacred Search" by Gary Thomas. It's a really great book for setting marriage standards and gives hope for waiting on a man who truly loves God.
Im going to be married but I am not attracted 😶
Fortunately marriage isn't a commandment, we aren't forced to marry anybody if we don't want to. Unfortunately if we don't end up getting married in our 20's our options shrink really bad and our only options are to marry somebody we aren't attracted to or be stuck being alone forever. It's a no-win situation. I don't know how old you are but try to find yourself a husband while you have the chance. 😎
Praying for you 🙏 God can still bring you someone who you find attractive. I do agree, marrying young is a great option! Thanks for watching and sharing 😊
Wait for ❤️ love, it's a season and time to fall in love ♥️
Oh you like poetry.... How about some biblical science monologue Enjoy :3
" God is all knowing and in the vast existent of space and time, exist infinite numbers of different timelines of different alternate of existents for everyone. God knows all those infinite threads of different timelines from beginning to end. And God knows every variation version of Ashley Curly of every timelines, and he browse through the numerous threads of whom you chose to marry, numerous of different men you with your own " free will" chose to marry. He sees both the phantom existents of timelines that could have been... and people who could have existed but weren't actualized because of men's free will. That's how he knows us before we came to be both actualized in reality or not. Kind of mind boggling huh if you think about it. That God knows and love people who don't exist that could have been here with us. All in all, take comfort allow God to be your match maker and he wont match you with someone you are not attracted towards, but does help to pray in detail what you want in your spouse.
Will God give me a person who doesn't even look good. But some how his good by heart and care taker..?With true love?