the rise of botox and filler, changing beauty standards, and decentering the male gaze
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- Äas pĆidĂĄn 27. 06. 2024
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In the latest episode of Elle's podcast, the discussion centers around the issue of beauty standards, specifically in relation to the popular TV show 'Love Island.' The topic of conversation revolves around how these women, most of whom are not close to 30, appear to look much older due to cosmetic procedures like Botox and fillers. Elle delves deep into the issue of unrealistic beauty standards and how they are perpetuated throughout society. Elle highlights the cyclical nature of beauty standards, where a certain look becomes popular, gets adopted by the masses, becomes oversaturated, and is then villainized. This cycle is driven by societal sentiments influenced by high-status groups, which are then transformed into beauty trends by marketers. The podcast also touches on the role of celebrities in setting these standards, using Kylie Jenner as a prime example. Elle concludes by pointing out that while individuals can choose which societal pressures to conform to, the pressure to conform will always exist as long as we live within a society. She encourages listeners to be more aware of these pressures and to make conscious choices about which ones to follow.
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I just wanna age gracefully and naturally. Wear lots of sunscreen eat vegetables and drink lots of water
Same
Yup, beauty standards change like micro trends, one season iâm ugly and next Iâm beautifulâŠ. Iâve adapted a neutral approach to myself to release the stress and pressure that were never to suit me in the first place⊠I look how I look and imma self care regardless.
Same. My hair has been greying since elementary but I really donât mind it at all. Hopefully it looks good on me as I get older but Iâll do my best to just maintain what I have lol. Sunscreen, have a good routine is really all we need. Knowing our style and colors too. As long as we know those things weâll be fine
And move your body enough if youâre able to
â@@Porceliankittychannel your inner Valyrian sis đ ..
"We are listening to men even when a woman is speaking" that is a BAR! And so unfortunate
THIS
âYour attention is currency so spent it wellâ đŻ
My jaw dropped to the floor. So true & sad..... .
where's the lie tho?đđœââïž
The makeup here in the UK also doesn't help. When they wash their faces to go to bed they automatically look much younger.
I am not watching Love Island this year, after watching for 3 years in a row. The whole thing is about humiliating women and making them fight for below bare minimum men.
So spot on .
Why do they even participate
â@Carry-on-my-wayward-son low self esteem and wanting validation and attention probably. i doubt it's bc they really expect to find love on there, some people are addicted to drama, and want to be famous
@@v.anessa1451 yes that sounds spot on
@@v.anessa1451 no its for the money
âThe average woman is beautiful.â I remember once at a couples party, the men & women were in separate rooms at one point & I said to the ladies (canât remember what we were talking about) -good looking men are rare, yet beautiful women are everywhere. The men overheard and were roaring with anger lol đ€·đ»ââïž
I think that too, women at 30s still look SO pretty yet men at 30 most look so beat down and most are bald already... The hit the wall way sooner, everything with them is projection
itâs true lol. they can get mad all they want, but whenever i go out i see so many beautiful women and maybe one attractive man
Exactly
Women who feel dehumanised because they donât fit societyâs ridiculous beauty standards and so they desperately try to do anything to fit them are and never will be the enemy. We as women all have certain trauma inflected by misogyny and sexism, no matter how minuscule. Some of us just have easier time dealing with it. We should never shame those who are crushed by this trauma, we should help and uplift them, while preventing the trauma from getting to younger women.
This
so much thisđđœ
@@therealmanifestelle I want to thank you for creating the content you do. I found you accidentally half an year ago and binged almost all of your videos, some of them bringing me to tears.
Before I found you one would probably describe me as âpick me liteâ - I looked for validation from men and thought that by judging other women I would somehow feel better about myself (product of my internalised misogyny and fear of accepting that I was bi). After I listened to you, for the first time in my life I felt validated and I fully accepted my womanhood, started improving myself and trying to uplift other women in hopes that nobody would feel like I did.
Just know that the content you make is life-changing and if it didnât exist I would have never been able to become a better version of myself.
Women who do meet the beauty standards are ridiculed too. Our male centered society will start asking why she doesn't have a husband if she is so "beautiful" but then when they do get married, they are still publicly humiliated when their low tier husbands cheat on them anyway.
Beautifully said!
As soon as the previous markers of class change (fillers once for the rich) and become more accessible (love island girlies) then the rich will change their taste so they maintain the differentiation between lower and higher classes.
đŻ
This is true. The clothing style went back to âquiet luxuryâ instead of âlogo flexingâ because the âregular peopleâ were able to get luxury logo items like Chanel and Louis Vuitton, and they were flexing on social media like the rich was doing.
100 percent... That's how the wheel of the class division keeps on going.
I think the way to go for those of us who feel we have to do the most for beauty, is to do one thing less, stuff you donât really enjoy, that drains money, time, feels like a chore is painful/no long term benefits, (waxing/sunbeds/nails/bleaching hair/spray tan/shaving) we need to lower the bar & divest in beauty standards that donât make us feel beautiful and comfortable and take regular upkeep. I went in to the hairdressers to have my hair bleached/recoloured, took like 7 hours for ÂŁ80 including discount?! I couldâve done it chilling at home in under 4, for less than ÂŁ30 and it wouldâve looked good enough. It also, wasnât even what I wanted/asked for đ . Our time and money is precious, spend it wisely.
Spot on
why do we never talk about how the men on love island look old AF too? they've definitely had ageing work done too (and veneers are very aging let's be real)
Yup, veneers look like dentures, very unnatural and dull.
@@fivemargaritasonly Iâm so glad you said this. I feel the same
@@fivemargaritasonlycomposite veneers, maybe. Porcelain can look very natural.
This video is about women who get plastic surgery. Interesting deflection. No one said men donât get surgery
Depending on the work being done.my veneershave actually helped my face look healthier and more youthful after recovering from surgery from a time period when I had bad teeth grinding and jaw clenching.
I would love us to talk about the role that GAY MEN play in the beauty industry/setting up or enforcing the beauty standard for mostly STRAIGHT WOMEN through makeup, hair, and fashion. Why don't we discuss this strange sycophantic relationship we have with men who aren't even physically attracted to us?
I have many gay male friends, and they are the only friends who have ever asked me why I don't want to look like Beyonce or Mariah, why I'm "such a mess, ew" because I go out without makeup, why I want to "look like a butch, ew" when I cut my hair.
Most often, it's gay men who don't conform to masculinity who say this, shaming women's gender nonconformity. Can we talk about it?
It's probably projection and competition.
Great point !! " strange sycophantic relationship "....well said!! I have been aware of this for decades !!
That perspective is very interesting. I have never thought about it
Sorry, but friends don't treat each other like this... and I mean, I get your point, but if they're treating you like "ew" instead of helping or something else, they're not your friend.
no you're just being homophobic , did you watch the vid ??? you can be both a victim and a perpetrator gay are no exception just like other women , this channel does indeed have Christian themes but i don't think this is a safe space for this kind of prejudice against queer people when they have been fighting hetronormativity and patriarchy that women have been suffering from since the dawn of time
Patriarchy is a game where you never win. The only way to win, is not to play. I'm glad i learned this lesson early in life.
This was a nuke on misogyny and the patriarchy. Ladies we must wake up, we are the universe and yet we let people tell us we are just a speck of grass. âBestie wake upâ€â- Elle
đŻ
đđœđđœđđœwake up
"The vibe today is not shaming women who do, or do not, get things done" â€
They should be shamed
â@@ideealhd2042 and you should get a job!
@@ideealhd2042 people who tell others what their face looks like (without being asked for their opinion) all the time, should be shamed. not the people who adjust and conform to finally end it.
I can feel sorry for young Kylie Jenner because she was an actual child who suffered from the horrors of being a child star thanks to her mom-a-ger. But she did keep at it and built a brand on cattiness with the rest of her family so I do have limited sympathy for adult Kylie. She made her brand on her public image and thats a double edged sword. I am glad she's saying that she basically wants to be the opposite kind of mom from her own. I hope she's able to protect her kid from the awful things that lead to herself getting so much work done so young.
honestly she was raised in such a shallow and fame hungry family. no wonder she has issues, these poor kids were never loved unconditionally.
I have alot of compassion for Kylie. She was the "ugly" sister and bullied at such a young age and drug into a reality TV life as a kid. You can see the light leave her as she gets work done to look like clones of her older sisters and it's not enough.
I remember seeing their show I'd watch at a friend's house some years back, and Kylie used to be funny and had a personality. It's sad the shell she seems like now )-:
Lucky for me, My life purpose is to create beauty, Not to be one.
What a quote đ
Yes! I love that. Surround yourself with beauty and that's more than enough.
I don't look for physical beauty in humans because that just objectifies people. Flowers, paintings, nice food, nice music etc. are ok with being objectified because they are objects and are there for us to enjoy.
@@TheDowntownHermit-xj6rq interesting. I want to be the embodiment of beauty as well. That's what femininity is about. And there are so many forms of being a woman, to be feminine, is one of them
@@coolbreeze5683 women like you break their heads with the concept of objectification. I rather see myself as a valuable human. That's the point when we say we're the prize, and a prize, yes is an object but a woman isn't one. You're never an object, you're a valuable human
@@marte1376 I basically said humans aren't objects. Maybe you misunderstood my comment.
Nothing new. Saddly. In fact, that reminds me of the PIP breast implant scandal. In the early 2010's, a huge scandale broke out after thousands of women found out that their breast implants ruptured and silicon gel leaked in their bodies. I've heard so many disgusting comments tearing these women apart. Some of them were already battling cancer and the others were basically told that it was their fault for being stupid enough to follow silly beauty standard. đźâđš
Look up aquafilling. Itâs nothing new and it will just keep happening. I might get some Botox when Iâm closer to 50 but I am staying away from everything else.
Sunscreen is my religion + few actives.
Seriously. As a smaller boobed person in a big boobed world, I've gotten PLENTY of insults from guys about it. But if I got implants that went wrong, I'd get insults for doing it in the first place. Women can never win in a patriarchy
â@@PraiseTheFSMonster we shouldn't give a f about what men want
It's our bodies we must love it ,and work on our self_love
ââ@@IrisDel-qo8xi you don't adapt that mindset doesn't in a day. we should aim for it, but it's hard
@@justasimplesimp7120 hard but not impossible âš
My parents look older at 20 than me because they smoked a ton and sunscreen was olive oil back then......
My mother used to sunbathe using Crisco back in the '80s, true story. Craziness.
@@MusclesandBooksliterally frying herself.
@@LoveK1 LOL as a GenX-er I can tell you the '80s were a TIME.
I'm Gen X, we used to use baby oil with iodine in it.
Yeah comparing our parents to 2024 20 something women is inaccurate.
Itâs wild how menâs value is based on something they can develop throughout their lives: wealth, career path, power, good character, education, skills, etc. whereas womenâs value is fixed: youth and natural beauty, genetic factors like breast size.
I love your empathy and kindness towards women. You're totally girl's girl â€
I think it was supposed to be the oppostie, but the more I watch your videos and other 4B channels, the more I realize how misogynistic women are and hust how much they partake & reaffirm in the patriarchy. Iâm proudly 4B and am working on ACTUALLY decentering men, but I think a huge part of this movement would be for women to start taking accountability for how we participate in this hamster wheel created by men. (And before you say âmen should take accountability!â. Yes they should, but Im decentering men hence I donât care what they do. I care what my sisters do and how it affects the next generation of girls.) please Iâd love to hear othersâ thoughts!
This! There has always been a hierarchy lurking in the background of patriarchy and women are the ring leaders. Itâs going to be even more difficult to dismantle IMO.
Agree!
You are right
Exactly â€
What does 4B channel mean?
I feel genuinely bad for the Love Island girls. They are regular people who were chosen by producers more or less exclusively for their looks. The producers for sure knew this bullying would happen and did it on purpose because online attention = revenue. I wish they have people in their lives that they care about that do not make negative remarks on their appearance. đą
I absolutely do not agree the producers picked them to get them bullied for views. They picked the because they thought they were attractive and desirable. In fact without that one singular viral tweet, no one really thought much about how âoldâ they look.
The patriarchy could care less about any of us women, whether we're considered beautiful or ugly. â°ïž 2 WAKE UP!
Ooof, well said.
Yupp
I'm almost 40 and I've never had anything done.. and I feel gorgeous! Not sure how it happened but it's possible
Same. Though genetics often plays a role too. I'm 36 going on 37, yet without makeup I can still pass for 15 to early 20s. My mama's genes are keeping me in good stead along with a healthy diet.
Yay for you? Not sure why you need to tell us.
@@guyincognito9698 so that peeps know itâs possible to get older and still feel gorgeous! Mr Incognito đ„ž
@@bananafanalll6651but if itâs genetic then that doesnât exactly help people who donât have youthful genes, does it? And not getting cosmetic procedures isnât a marker of virtue or being better than anyone else, though a lot of people here seem to think that.
@@guyincognito9698 I genuinely canât afford expensive treatments and Iâm not even saying I have good genetics. Iâm simply saying that I feel gorgeous! And thatâs a choice and my prerogative
That plastic surgeon labeling women that the women were 35, 38 in age. Anyone can look however they want to regardless of their age!
There are so many non celebrity women who look like in their 20's but they are in their 40's or older.
We need to let men and media stop labeling women fo how they should look with their age!
Yeah, but itâs insane how much older these people look and itâs likely because of bad procedures and too much makeup.
Iâm personally not shaming these women, though. Rather the society that pressures women into getting shoddy work done (since most people canât afford the best) and piling on makeup to be their version of âbeautiful.â
Like, they look really pretty, but itâs still sad. Women deserve to be naturally beautiful if they want without being shamed.
Also he way overestimated. I'm 33 and look maybe 25. I would have guess like 5 years or more lower than what he did
He was right. They look older. He was shocked. He has experience with faces and they looked older to him. Am 37 and all of those women lool a lot older than me. I was shocked! It's probably best they dissolve what they did to their face. It didn't improve their looks.
â@aurora8749 Girl, same! I just turned 34yo and when I go out with my 8.5yo and people think I'm her older sister. People always think I'm late teens- 25yo.
Why are you upset with the surgeon. They asked him to estimate and thatâs his area of expertise so he did! They look like theyâre around 40. Thatâs not his fault!
But why are young women doing this? Older women did it to help with aging, they have youth they don't need it đą Bodies aren't fashion trends
Theyâre trying to look as sexy as possible and maybe make it as influencers.
The Internet has brainwashed young women into believing their natural faces are "ugly" unless they look exactly like Instagram models.
Of course they are
Just because someone if youthful doesnât mean theyâre seen as pretty. And women bodies are fashion rends and have been so for quite a while now
Well that's the point: Older women didn't ever need it either. The idea that old = not desirable / young = beautiful is a construct, just as much as static forehead = no wrinkles = beautiful, or full lips = beautiful is a construct. NONE of that is "needed", ever. We are just being told that it is.
I think it's unfair to say that the Kardashians didn't have a hand on this new beauty standard of lip fillers and modified bodies. They were the ones that actually made it popular and studies show that they had almost a 300% effect, as in, the number of women seeking cosmetic procedures like theirs grew by almost 3 times as much due to their influence. So you know what? Take some responsibility and learn to be accountable for your own actions. I am not for shaming, but at least let's tell the truth. Since you did this to yourself and you highly benefited from it and now you are upset that others are noticing the side effects, then be grown up enough to own and handle it.
Nicky worded completely agree
Just because they didnât create it doesnât mean that they didnât magnify it exponentially, agreed
â@@Wee_Catalyst yep. And profited off of it. Kylie and her "lip kits".
@@girlofanimation Youâre so right! They made so much money off of pushing these trends-if sheâs so sorry about it then donate a bunch of that money she obvi doesnât need for things like cleft palate surgeries to those who canât afford it or something like that
@@IrsidaSheshi đŻ
It's all about "plastic surgery is empowering gurl yes get it for your confidence!!" then the exact same people snicker and snark at you when it ends up looking too unnatural. It's plain misogyny and even more sinister that young women are being told by their own peers that procedures are actually positive for self-esteem which no one questions and if you do you're fought against hard. The baseline for women's looks has moved up exponentially and it's almost impossible, no one looks the same online vs real life but that's what we're consuming all day. So either accept yourself or give loads of money to these clinics that prey on young women's insecurities and end up more insecure than when you began because the professional pointed out all your miniscule imperfections you never even imagined so they can sell some extra mL of filler.
Puzzling to me how they think one can attain self confidence and self love by first accepting that there are faults with their body that need to be corrected⊠and those âfaultsâ are nothing but beauty fads. Once you allow yourself to mutilate your body like that in the pursuit of beauty, your reaction to feelings of inadequacy will forever be âI canât accept myself as I am, I need to be corrected.â That is the opposite of self confidence and self love.
Thatâs why I skip the first part telling the women around me that they should empower themselves by getting work done . . .
Mindfuck for your friends avoided
YES YES YES ITS THE INSANE CIRCULAR NON-LOGIC âlet them do whatever they want to do their bodyâ Ok but WHY NOT QUESTION why they want to do that to their body in the first place!!! Why is there no critical thinking anymore
Recently when I heard my dad commenting on how âstupidâ those women got their surgeries and processes and got the âconsequencesâ, I realize how my misogyny has internalized by all the men around me and my society.
I mean... it IS stupid and yes they now have to live with the consequences. It's one thing to try to benefit from pretty privilege. It's another to rush to the cheapest clinic and get a bunch of bad plastic surgery and overfill your face. There is no quick fix for beauty. It's better to look average than to look botched
My worth does not come from my beauty, it comes from how well I take care of myself. Who cares if I look good? Do I FEEL good, that's what's important.
That is so true, feeling good is the goal, bc feeling good makes yourself glow from the inside.
That really is the lifestyle
When you feel good, you look good.
Does anybody else remember the marketing strategy for cosmetic procedures being a preventive measure? I'm so happy I didn't have excess money when they were promoting it that way because I probably would have been in the same boat as these women
That season of Love Island was based in the UK. And in the UK annnnyone can get licensed to do injections within two days. TWO DAYS. So fillers are cheaper, more common, and sadly less professionally done.
Not saying things are much better in other countries⊠but some laws really should change regarding the safety and ethics of this stuff.
That sounds dangerous! Why would the UK allow that? Even with our laws people in the US have gone blind from improperly administered filler.
@@eleanor8652it really does sound dangerous! This might be the first time Iâm glad I couldnât afford something⊠had I been younger and living in the UK, my face might look completely different right now.
Not sure that is correct. Most places who do fillers and botox are private cosmetic companies at private clinics. The customer needs to wait 2 days before getting injections. Not the cosmetic doctors getting their licence to practice in the UK.
I think you have the UK confused with another country like Turkey.
Here in the UK, we ha e strict laws on cosmetics and cosmetic surgeries. Our MHRA regulation does not allow unqualified people to give pharmaceutical or cosmetic surgery.
@@vikki8699 unfortunately it is correct, as I just did a quick search to confirm the information. You can indeed become certified to do injectables and dermal fillers in two days! Absolutely wild.
My rule is: if I want it but canât afford it rn I WILL NOT spend on a cheaper version. I either get it done right or not at all. At the end of the day I have a way I want to look and I will not decide based on desperation and âtrying to fit inâ. My focus is health without breaking the bank and beauty in a more natural way. Am I always happy with my appearance? No, but Iâd rather slowly get stuff done then get botched because âbeauty standardsâ that donât even stay consistent. Keeping up and financing this toxicity is like trying to people please my mother, itâs never going to be enough no matter how hard you try.
âThe average woman is beautifulâ so true
The best thing you can do is figure out that your face is beautiful QUICK. The longer it takes for you to realize that, the sicker and poorer you'll be. If you want to save money, pain, and time, love yourself FAST.
Facts
I dare you all to use the word nagging against men when they do it, it will change your world.
A Man told me I looked better without makeup on our second date, jeez what a nag, commenting on how I do things already, so unattractive. Next.
I'm so done the society even some jealous women always criticise women. I am supporting good women no matter what...
đđ»â€â€
I also feel just so tired from inter and intra misogyny
Does Kylie ever look herself in the mirror and not recognize herself? Seeing her teenage self and her now self side-by-side, they look like completely different people. I can't imagine the horror of seeing a childhood photo of yourself and not being able to recognize yourself.
And my heart goes out to her because it is so difficult to survive in such an environment and you become desperate and make decisions that are not the best.
It really is a question of how much are you willing to lose yourself in pursuit of ungodly fame and fortune or to fit in vs. how willing you are to be your authentic self in a world that rejects being human in favour of being fake. đą
I wonder if it was all some pursuit of ungodly fame and fortune either. As a young teen, I donât think Kylie ever had a real choice. Her family was in the show biz, making money off their appearance, and steeped in that environment where beauty means everything and plastic surgery is not just super accessible but perhaps even enforced, how could she ever have made any other decision?
â@@malinasworld To assume that she didn't have "any other choice" is to deny the fact that she is human and has her own agency and is capable of making her own decisions. No one "forced" her to get lip injections or a boob job. She made a decision in desperation and regrets it now. đ
@@airavibes Iâm talking about when she was a child, a teenager.
Comparison with older siblings can have devastating effects that last your whole life sometimes..
â@airavibes Don't forget the shaved jaw bone, the butt implants, or the nose job!
As an older auntie, let me give advice based on what I have observed over time:
-getting work done isn't bad but you should always aim to do the minimum amount needed to achieve what you want.
-the more you do more the quicker you age. This counts for botox and fillers but also things like skincare as well. It just is so adversarial to your body that it ends up having adverse effects eventually. Its the same reason you dont want to over exfoliate! Stick with face wash, a moisturizer, sunscreen if you'll be outside more than like 30 min and minimize treatments like serums to active issues. The less you do the better you will age. But this is just for your actual body. Have fun with whatever make up.
-Figure out your look and establish it rather than trying to adopt all trends. Works for both fashion as well as styling your body. Like you can still add or adapt but be choosey on what you add esp for longer lasting things like changing your actual body.
And this isn't meant to shame. This is just me trying to pass on what I have observed over the decades to younger folks, because when it comes to your physical body you only get the one. Please try to take care of it.
The photographer did those poor women so dirty! Like their styling does skew older but it's 100% the photographer/whoever chose the specific photos since they also chose awkward poses and did some very specific photoshop on it.
thanks for the advice!!
âThe more you do the quicker you ageâ in reference to skincare is just not true. Great to have opinions, passing them as facts is the problem.
âDonât you see everything is designed to keep us from having time to philosophize and to mobilize and to grow wealth? Ok? Like, things are designed to keep us from reading, from writing, from gossiping, from creating community.â đđ„°
Except, gossiping is toxic and counterproductive.
@@TLW369she has an episode where she talks about how gossiping is a way women have been able to protect each other from dangerous men. Although I agree that sometimes it can be counterproductive, like when itâs women making up lies about other women. Iâve definitely been the victim of that.
The kardashians didnât exist in the cultural zeitgeist when i struggled with my body image issues. To blame one woman for this is so reductive. Sheâs also reaching the age where her prefrontal cortex is fully developed. Her sense of self is now better formed and she has the intellectual capacity to frame her behaviors in the wider lens of our culture.
Sheâs absolutely a victim and perpetrator, but ultimately, under patriarchy, men are the beneficiaries when our time, money, and energy are wasted on fulfilling these beauty standards.
The best option is to do as much as you can to opt out. If we collectively make the push, itâll be easier for the next generation. BUT I also understand that some women donât have much of a choice in some situations. Just do what you can to love your natural self. Take care of yourself, drink water, wear sunscreen, and get sleep.
My life didnât get harder when I stopped trying to conform; it got better, simpler, and easier. I got more respect from both men and women. The second I walk in the door, you can feel that Iâm confident, self aware, and brutally honest. Manipulation doesnât work on me, and I stay calm. Iâm more resilient than Iâve ever been. It triggers weak people, but if you mentally step over those people and donât engage, they run from you because you make them feel the shame of knowing theyâve sold out. You should find out what you want, and why you want it. Is it really for your own sake? On an island alone, would you still choose it for its intrinsic value to you?
I rarely wear makeup, and I wear what I like just because I like it. I naturally attract people who care about self development and individual authenticity. The cost is I constantly work on my mental health, and I hold myself accountable for my goals, actions, and needs fulfillment. I used to be very codependent, till I got sick to death of it, and tired of selling myself short. This started in childhood because my mother is a narcissist. âLive as if no one is watchingâ is awesome advice.
âNo woman is truly free until she can live as though her parents are dead.â (Paraphrased for gender)
Nara Smith is the new Kylie Jenner with the even harder to obtain standards. Mark. My. Words. Her ânaturalâ look is already trending. Good luck finding time and money to do Naraâs beauty routine/lifestyle
I feel bad for them getting bullied. As a 28 year old with static smile lines and forehead lines, I can understand feeling insecure. Iâm anxious, feel dehydrated even when I drink water, have super dry/textured skin, rarely get enough sleep since I feel like I still need to read work documents after I come home on top of cooking and working out, fluctuated in weight, and love walking in the sun. so of course I have premature wrinkles. I am working on my skincare but have to be patient for results. I personally donât want Botox/fillers but have empathy for anyone who feels the need to
hey, that part about feeling dehydrated even when you drink water sounds like a possible sign of a (pre)diabetes. hope you can afford to check out things /genuine
Or a thyroid issue... anxiety, thirst, dry skin, weight loss (I assume, as weight gain usually smoothes the skin). Might be worth having that checked out.
Thanks! I should get this checked out since my momâs diabetic
or yin deficiency in Traditional Chinese Medicine if you're into holistic medicine xx
The secret of skin care is to be patient and maintain a routine, after 6 months you will see results and after a year you will see that it was worth it, there will come a point where it will become a step that you do every day without thinking. Retinol, a mineral sunscreen and Vitamin C are the most important things and they don't have to be expensive products, it's consistency.
No ones talks about how when women almost die getting their body done saying "im not insecure im doing this for me" like you didnt feel like that before having a big ass was a thing. Its just for male validation
Your class consciousness is one of the coolest things about you! Youâre super smart, Iâm loving your channel.
Once upon a time, I wanted to be an actress. I studied acting in San Diego for two years and when I graduated, I decided to move to LA to pursue my dreams. I remember the temptation to get plastic surgery. By Hollywood beauty standards, I probably âneededâ to âfixâ my nose and get my breasts done, at the minimum. I remember thinking I simply didnât want to carve into my body, but I knew that it would come down to that, eventually. âI donât live my life based on what society tells me,â became my mantra and I moved back to my hometown.
Iâm extremely grateful something inside me just wouldnât go through with that, but itâs very hard to resist. This was before KK took over, Iâm so glad I got out before all that.
Can we just stop shaming women period?
If look like me( a bog witch) or a supermodel canât we just talk about something else and make fun of something else?
If it not kind or helpful leave it out? Maybe? Perhaps
Love you Elle. Your content is really deep and you give voice to thousands of women. You're a revolution girl and I'm proud to walk with you in this, making the revolution in my sphere
Seriously the shaming is out of control
Sooo many gems in this one . â Culture is how a lot of people react to somethingâ !
Exactly . Like some say we donât still have a âcultureâ of misogyny yet you all react by cringing when a woman tries to make a joke. You eviscerate Kylie Jenner for â perpetuating beauty standards â yet are the first people who call the women who took your man ugly and horse faced bc you assume physical attacks will hurt her more than more than character assessments .
Saying that we donât have a culture of racism yet you all ignore when your friends say something racist or laugh it away as dark humor ⊠are you sure they only feel that way in the context of a joke ?
Iâm so glad this wasnât the culture when I was in my 20âs. Itâs weird that these young women look older than I do in my 40âs just because I havenât had any cosmetic procedures that signal âfighting agingâ
I really love seeing people come after kylie as if beauty standards as a whole is entirely her faultâŠ. Like dude she got plastic surgery for a reason, she got lip fillers because people were literally bullying herđ
Exactly! Kylie was getting bullied so much as a young teen. She did not set the beauty standard and I'm tired of people re writing this narrative. The standard existed and she was bullied for not fitting it.
She made money off of those standardsâŠa billion dollar company. YES she is to be held responsible are you kidding?
No one is saying it's entirely her fault. People are just saying that cry me a river girl cause you brought this on yourself. There is something to be said about accountability and that's okay too.
@@evaphillips2102 do you have an extremely hard reading comprehension?
@@IrsidaSheshi except she didnât really bring it to herself? Because the already existing beauty standards is what caused her to want to get plastic surgery? Sheâs allowed to feel upset about that, and nobody said there doesnât need to be any accountability.
I missed u, you're the eldest sister I'll never have
Omg I have missed you!! How have you been?
Brilliant video. I have noticed how fillers and botox ages people. Thats because of the amount of stress the skin is put under to achieve that look. Trauma to your skin ages you.
The love island ladies are beautiful and cute! If they got work done, thats their choice and I will always support a woman's choice regarding their bodies.
Lets face it. "Average" is now ugly and these super models are now the "average". I believe the beauty standards are insanely out of touch with reality to the point the men have no idea what is real.
They cannot even tell if a woman has make up on. Yet scream they want "natural" yet they deem actual natural women are ugly. đ
I am so glad you covered this! †Thank you.
âEven if you think youâre just wearing sweatsâŠthat in itself is still a costume. Ok, youâre still communicating something through thatâ -Manifestelle
Well said đđœđđœđđœ I needed to hear that! Thank you đđœ
I love how the surgeon said oh, eyebrows and fake lashes /s. That's not plastic surgery, sir.
You can get Botox eyebrow done
She said âsay if you think theyâre natural or not.â The plastic surgeon knows what plastic surgery is. đ
I absolutely love how pro woman you are â€đđ»
Great video as always. I especially love the point about how the male doctor is the one insulting the women but the Kardashians get the blame.
Gosh I love that she posts at 8am because Iâm totally down to start listening at 8am.
That first sentence is so wrong. We're talking about grown women. Everyone is fed the same trends. Yet some choose to follow every one of them, while others pay them no attention. These women are fully responsible for their choices. Not only that : since they usually promote them, they are also responsible for spreading that toxic behavior and mindset. Let's please stop infantilizing women. That is misogyny. Women are strong and independent, until it's time to take ownership of their choices. Yes, we can be influenced by media and trends. No, we're not victims to them because only we can choose to follow them or not. Most people don't. They don't even have the means to. But also, we don't have to be so shallow as to define our self-worth based on how attractive we look to random strangers.
Im 32, and people way younger than me, my age and older than me think im in my early to mid 20âs. Its definitely my lived experience but I dont know people in my age group getting stuff done, nor of that from people older than me.
I dont know who âweâ is for this video.
It's true. As a single working woman (with three kitties!) my top priorities are keeping us housed, alive, having money to travel to and from work, and the rest is usually reserved for trying to look as pretty as possible so that I'm not ignored. It feels awful to be treated like a potted plant when you're seen without your artificial colors.
22:28 Yes *"The beauty industry/cosmetic surgery industry is like the military industrial complex."* đŻđđđ
My problem is with the dermatologist, cosmetic nurses & plastic surgeons pushing all this botox, filler & surgeries on women at startlingly young ages with the false promise of "IF you start now it's preventative & better for you in the long run." We see now after 20 years of filler use that's simply not true.
They push procedures & lasers to make money and profit off of the insecurity of women.
Look at the new push for facelifts for younger women.
Yes, I had so many young friends, even literally high school age, who went to get fillers and are then told "oh well this thing also looks crooked so we can fill that up too to fix it" and fearmongering making up these new insecurities to get repeat customers. It's sinister and of course young women would feel shame like it's somehow their fault for not being born perfect.
Iâm grateful for my filler lady for warning me (and talking me down) when I suggested more. I had a lil Botox near my eyes and forehead and a little lip filler, it looked really natural. (Iâm 36 and was SHOCKED these women were so much younger than me) Itâs wild, unless you have wrinkles, Botox just seems crazyyyyy
I'm glad that because of I'm extremely broke, I cannot cater to any kind of beauty standard
Things are designed to keep us from âreading, from writing, from gossiping, from creating community.â - I kinda love that gossip is in thereâŠitâs another word for communication. And men/boys certainly do it too. Like Imagine if the âgossipâ in Hollywood or a workplace lead to accountability and consequences for predator bosses (for example)
When you said the pressure for women to look a certain way is worse the more metropolitan the area. I felt it so deeply. I live in one of the biggest cities in the US and I struggle so much! Its ridiculous but aside from that I believe and have heard and witnessed that women in my city are some of the most beautiful in the entire US. Movie stars and rock stars come here and talk about that. I live in a lower income area so the standard isn't as high but higher than even lower income areas and when i go to this city close by where the average income is much higher, every woman looks like a super model. Its insane. If you ever go to a concert in Scottsdale, Arizona, look around and be prepared to feel like chopped liver lol
Personally I've never seen a good outcome from lip plumping, I think it's a bad look on everybody. Generally a face designed for thinner lips, is beautiful, one designed for thicker lips is also beautiful. Both require much care, not injections of questionable substances. Much is made of the body, it is up to the individual to create a strong boundary to stop infiltration of "beauty" standards from society into consciousness. These wacko procedures should be regarded as such, and rigorously rejected. When self esteem is intact, things like this are just weird and irrelevant. If you're wanting to do this stuff, ask yourself what is it in your life which is corroding your happiness and self esteem, why are you not good enough in your natural state, find these answers-as signposts to positive change.
You donât see the good results because they look natural.
@@guyincognito9698exactly
â@@guyincognito9698I'm sure most people think their results look "natural".
âEven when we talk to women, weâre listening to menâ âŒïžâŒïž
I never throw hate on celebrities I don't like, i just ignore them, nothing uglier than being a troll.
I also never tank about other people's bodies, specially about women's because I, as a woman, know how hard it is for us out here being constantly objectified by men and women alike.
To comment on other women's bodies is disgusting.
That being said, these days, when it comes to the Kardashians, nepo babies and most privileged and shallow celebrities, sorry but "my give a fucks are on vacation...'' I'm not a perpetrator but I can see why people are mad at Kylie for destroying young women's self steem with unattainable beauty standards. The whole family destroyed an entire generation. 31:35
It's like the actress from the show The BOYS. After 3 seasons of enduring the male gaze, all the thirsty fans of the show commenting on her physics she ended up getting to much plastic surgery and guess WHO'S on every posts message bords criticizing her looks? đ Exactly the same fan boys. Sickening
I must say, what Kylie has realised after becoming a mom is beautiful. I hope she raises Stormi better than how she was raised, with less pressure to conform.
One thing I have noticed through the last interactions with men (including my ex partner): Everything is projection or distraction I haven't decided yet. By that I mean that some men looove to yap! They SPEAK of things you agree on (communication is key, loyalty) and they talk about how important they think these topics are bla bla. So you are automatically put in a place where you try to prove your worth and that yes you do have these qualities. While the more important perspective is not focused now: do they themselves have these traits? SO GIRLS AND WOMEN if someone points out some things a bit more often than necessary, before proving your point check if they are doing it themselves or just trying to shift the focus away from them so that they can do whatever they want to you because you're too busy proving something to them!! Probably no new knowledge just sharing my experiences
i really thought after all the lives lost cuz of covid ppl would appreciate aging and realize what a privilege it is to liveâ€
Years ago I was working in a luxury store. For that job I had to be very well dressed and made up. I normally dressed like this for big occasions, a party or a date, but now that style had become my normality, in my daily life. Little by little I began to get used to that standard of beauty and it began to seem insufficient to me, each time I needed to dress up more and spend more money on beauty products. The funniest thing is that I was making minimum wage. Until one day I got fed up, luckily I didn't have to work in that place anymore and I was able to be myself again. I started practicing "ugliness", I stopped putting on makeup and getting ready and now every time I simply straighten my hair and put on mascara I feel like a diva. Sometimes you just have to stop and practice "ugliness."
the part about kylie and individuation is so true. i have younger sisters and i had an eedee for 4 years; only this spring did i ask myself the question âhow will my sisters feel if i keep struggling?â. as much as we donât want our problems to affect others, they do in fact affect others, and we cannot do anything about it.
I think I am somewhat lucky not to the beauty standard of the US or my ethnic background because I saw how frivolous it was after being made fun of and realizing I will never fit that standard. I do what I can with where Iâm at economically to make myself feel good not to fit societies beauty standard. I have empathy for people like Kylie Jenner now or any celebrity woman because the pressure to look a certain way is so much higher than a regular person. It doesnât matter who you are as a woman, most will be tethered to compete in the beauty market, if you donât there are consequences.
I think itâs also because it weighs down their faces, one of the things that indicated age is the weight distribution in the face- if itâs placed lower, you instinctually perceive them as older.
Filler doesnât follow the same rules as fat, so it can sit lower in your face even if you are very young.
What's wrong with looking old or being old? Being old should be a mark of success in life. Maybe some wisdom has been attained. Old for women is bad, according to patriarchy. Wisdom is for dummies.
The things I'm committed to doing for my own physical and inner beauty is:
Get enough restful sleep
Eat a balanced diet
Exercise/movement regularly
Live as stress free as possible
Live a rich (not necessarily in terms of money) life
Let's get it ladies!!! Wishing us all the best and most fufilled life :D â€â€â€
We need to stop analyzing peopleâs looks like theyâre some specimen (work done or not)!
We literally have plastic surgeons in every social media platform rating women's appearances as "educational" content! with millions of followers and views. The idea is I'll criticize this woman work so you can do some "better" work. In the end the message is one they will tell you how you should look to be pretty and accepted
I'm 42 now and there is a huge difference in the way the skin thickness of a 40 year old and a 20 year old looks. If a plastic surgeon can't see how plump and thick their skin is and know they are young then wow, he needs a new job
*The thing with beauty standards is that they are SUPPOSED to be unattainable. As soon as they become accessible to the masses, the bar is raised. BY DEFINITION everyone can't have pretty privilege. If everyone is beautiful, then no one is.*
Exactly
GREAT video. you managed to put into words a lot of my thoughts about beauty standards and how we as a society deal with them
I missed you!!!!
A german streamer got shamed into fillers and had cheek and lip fillers for years. She got an mri scan and the stuff had migrated all over her face, lots of it, years after getting them. She got all dissolved and regrets doing so much without really thinking about it. Doctors in germany don't tell you this when you ask about filler treatments, do US doctors?
Damn. I have definitely been an agent of the patriarchy in this case. Yikes. I regret it.
It is a mark of maturity and integrity to be able to admit when you are wrong and publicly denounce it
We all have been unfortunately. All we can do is mature and grow and guide younger girls down a better path
thank you for your inspired synthesis of pop culture in beauty standards, class and capitalistic exploitation of human needs. Great class, bestie!
It should be noted that it wasn't just the public who was bullying Kylie. Kendall and her friends were apparently BRUTAL to Kylie. Honestly: Kylie is catching heat right now because her aesthetic is leaving the beauty standard spotlight, and she is more insecure and sensitive than the rest of her narc sociopathic family members. HOWEVER, she still is socially conditioned to this behavior and worldview, honestly.
HOWEVER, honestly: Kendall should be catching wayyy more heat. She's a toxic B who is known to bully multiple people including her own sister.
elle this comment section is gold. i'm so happy to be a part of this spoiled girly community
This is your best video so far, hands down. Bravo!!
Wow your points are so valid, well done đđŒ
Miss you elle, and I love your outro, its soo calming
Botox doesn't really change the way someone looks tho.
It can raise an eyebrow by about 1-3 mm or lessen the prominence of fine lines, but that's about it (unless your injector is incompetent and gives you ptosis or spock eyebrows). Obviously no one "needs" Botox, so you can save your money and just skip it (except of course if you have a medical condition) but if you want it, get it. As long as your injector knows what they are doing, it isn't going to "age" you or "botch" you. Fillers can easily do that..
These videos lump filler and Botox/Xeomin etc into one box and it really makes them sound uneducated. Botox doesnât age someoneâŠ. It literally reduces the signs of aging already present. Itâs bizarre how hard people come down on Botox without even understanding what it is
Welcome back queen
Love your channel you give such good insights while being authentic and entertaining. Keep shining from one spoilt girly to another âš
This was a really thoughful and nuanced take! Loved the video, plz make more about culture/ femininsim
This is such an excellent video, thank you
Literally my fav girly channelđđ
Missed you! Such a good class â€
This might be my favourite video you've done, I always feel very empowered after watching your videos. Thank you. X
Heeeey bestie! So glad to see this pop up! Such a great class topic!