ADHD and Masking | ADHD Parenting
Vložit
- čas přidán 5. 09. 2024
- ADHD and Masking | ADHD Parenting
Do you struggle with masking?
Krista Carlin is a license social worker in Ontario, Canada. She has been really interested the growing interest in neurodiversity and has been applying learnings to her psychotherapy work. She is an ADHD certified clinical provider. She has worked with all ages, families, kids, adults. She mostly focuses on adults today. Krista really dives in deep into masking. It is really interesting how she explains why masking could develop in the first place. She also talks about when does it become and issue and how can someone take the first step of unmasking if that is a direction someone wants to go.
Her resources:
■ Instagram: / adhd.with.krista.c.the...
■ Website: www.krista-c-therapy.ca
■ The Whole-Brain Child and The Power of Showing Up by Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson
■ Inclusive Therapists: www.inclusivet...
■ Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You by Jenara Nerenburg
■ The Neurodiversity Table - / theneurodiversitytable - Offers an unmasking workbook
Also, check me (Yakini) out on:
■ Facebook / adhdlove2020
■ Twitter - / adhdlove2020
■ Instagram - / adhdlove2020
■ Clubhouse - www.joinclubho...
ADHD Love Merchandise:
■ www.adhdlove20...
#adhd #hyperactivity #distraction #inattentive
This is good. I was just recently diagnosed, just a month ago, and I’m 44 yrs old. Since I’ve learned about ADHD I’ve noticed myself trying to unmask and be more of “myself” around family. It’s not received well. One area where I mask a lot is just how easily I get confused. I will say I’m confused because I can’t fully hide my confusion 100%, but I usually wait until some time has gone by before I say something when in fact I was confused the moment they started giving instructions. I learn visually and through hands-on. Telling me step by step does NOT work! But no one knows that because I’ve never felt that safety like she was saying. People laugh at you when you’re so easily confused. 😕
I get it. I am 46 and even though I am a lot better, I still mask once in a while. Especially if I don't want to hurt someone feelings. I have gotten better at being honest when I am confused, but it took a minute for me to get there!!
@@ADHDLove2020 Exactly!!! People get offended when you say you don’t understand, that’s a very good point. That’s another reason I don’t immediately say something. At my previous job, I would wait until the meetings were over to ask my co-worker I trusted to show me what I needed to do. She never made fun of me or laughed at me. She just knew I learned better by seeing and doing so she never minded showing me. Appreciative of people like her.
Around the 12 minute mark she explains something I’ve tried to put into words for the last 6 months and people just look at me like I’m crazy.
I had a lot of trauma, via family deaths and divorce when I was young, and I noticed that when I was sad, I got yelled at for doing or saying inappropriately funny things for the situation a whole lot less than when I wasn’t sad. So, I started using sadness and eventually what I referred to in my mind as a selective use of apathy to down-regulate myself and make myself more acceptable to the people around me, and massive use of caffeine to attempt to maintain functionality.
As she states however; it caused problems down the road, fell into several very long depressions, but when people would ask if I was depressed, I would say no, because I felt no different than normal but the caffeine wasn’t countering anymore. I was using depressive thoughts and feelings to keep my more energetic adhd symptoms under control.
I was finally diagnosed a month ago with adhd among other things. Started on adderall XR and the first day it broke all the depressive sticks that I held in place to keep myself appearing normal. I walked around work (smh) jabbering at people at like 800 mph and making jokes all day. It felt very strange, but also very familiar. Felt like I did when I was a kid, before all the death, divorce and endless criticism for not meeting my potential.
It toned down the next day, but it was enough for me to realize I had been hurting myself in order to appear more normal because the alternative as more painful.
I feel like I’m rambling a bit, meds must be wearing off. Hope someone finds this rabbit trail helpful.
This was so insightful, digging deeper into the different ways the mind regulates it’s self to accommodate to its environment. I never put much thought on the different ways ADHD can present itself. I always doubted my diagnosis due to the misconceptions I had about ADHD. Learning about masking has helped me come closer to understanding myself. Thank you for sharing this conversation!
Absolutely, Alania! I have learned so much about me to in this process!
Thank you so much for this video. I’ve recently become aware of my neurodivergency and the many masks I’ve navigated life with. The insight you shared about what ADHD is on a neurological level blew my mind and allowed me to understand more why I put on masks in certain situations that feel unsafe, even when I’m not sure of why. I’ll be using the unmasking workbook to begin journaling through all of this and I’ve scheduled my first appointment with a therapist. Nervous but excited to begin this journey of true self awareness and embracing my authenticity ❤️
Thank you for checking it out. Yes, it has been a very fulfilling journey for me learning about my brain and my children's brains.
im a rabbit mom, but this was such a great interview, thankful to adhd love for having this space (just discovered you today) and so insightful for me and affirming when it comes to masking, also so interesting to learn how therapy has evolved and integrating social justice as it definitely ties into how I move and interpret my spaces as well as coming from cultural backgrounds that arent particularly affirming or understanding as well
Thank you Abriana!
Lived most of my life masking. I hit a wall in life and now must learn to live unmasked. This helped alot.
Gr8 conversation🙏🏽 I learned allot
Thank you for checking it out!!! She was awesome to talk to.
I specifically clicked on this, because you're a Black woman. I was diagnosed later in life, too (35-ish). Thank you for this video
I appreciate your support.
Why does it take 6 1/2 min to get to the topic listed in the headline. Pleasantries, guest intro and bio….HELLO! I have an attention regulation problem and only listened that far because I was in the car. Trimming this down would help info get through to people who need to hear it. Put the bio at the end maybe?
My processing speed is a lot quicker than this Has to turn this up to 2x faster to pay attention 😃