THE VICIOUS CYCLE OF MALE ANXIETY || HCPOD

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  • čas přidán 2. 03. 2024
  • Chuckie & Tazer have a candid conversation about male anxiety in the current dating scene.

Komentáře • 99

  • @Gemma.Marie.
    @Gemma.Marie. Před 3 měsíci +48

    Need a part 2 on this subject!
    So fascinating to hear a man's perspective on relationship anxiety. Big up you guys

  • @sharonleitch7157
    @sharonleitch7157 Před 3 měsíci +22

    Building positive relationships is the key to success! Get off the phones, take a break from podcasts n get outside n meet people in real life. There are no rules, be authentic with who you are and as openly honest as you can be and confident in describing yourself as you are. There is no pressure other than the ones you ones you place on yourself. Njoy learning about yourself through other people and your relationships.
    Not every relationship even gets to the point of an intimate encounter! X

  • @LisaSmith-xy2uv
    @LisaSmith-xy2uv Před 3 měsíci +19

    Learnt a lot from this ep as a girl. Honestly very good to hear how it is from the male side. Loved this

  • @teeinfinity
    @teeinfinity Před 2 měsíci +4

    People also dont speak about the expected pressure men have on satisfying women in the bed room and the outcomes that can happen if they dont

  • @demonslayer9101
    @demonslayer9101 Před 3 měsíci +40

    At this point just give E A a mic. Callum got one...

    • @kennethparker9946
      @kennethparker9946 Před 3 měsíci +14

      Surely, HC pod can afford a mic. If not, put the brother on the couch. He clearly always has something to say

    • @Laura-sg6ss
      @Laura-sg6ss Před 2 měsíci +1

      ​@@kennethparker9946 they can😂😂 but this dynamic is different man😂😂 loooll

  • @CP-gq7en
    @CP-gq7en Před 3 měsíci +13

    Nice mature convo today, glad Poet wasn’t there.

  • @jas1511
    @jas1511 Před 3 měsíci +5

    Music from certain genres / eras can be soothing. Doesn't matter if you were listening to it in that era or have just discovered it.

  • @nataliecampbell-reid2340
    @nataliecampbell-reid2340 Před 3 měsíci +14

    "I saw 6'5 in the bio and I didn't take it seriously' 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I'm done

    • @Laura-sg6ss
      @Laura-sg6ss Před 2 měsíci +1

      I was doing my skin routine when I heard that part and I was cacklingg😂😂😂

  • @benja303
    @benja303 Před 3 měsíci +21

    Fascinating title, looking forward to this one

  • @Sylvia-hu1sx
    @Sylvia-hu1sx Před 3 měsíci +55

    I think we as a society are suffering because we don't have a third place to hang out.

    • @ZX-fg6xd
      @ZX-fg6xd Před 3 měsíci +43

      I see this trend going around on social media of people saying there is no third place to hangout. It just sounds like a complicated way of saying people don't have any healthy group oriented hobbies.

    • @DavidBlaxk
      @DavidBlaxk Před 3 měsíci +1

      I seen that CZcams video aswell

    • @Cee_H
      @Cee_H Před 3 měsíci +13

      People using the term Third place might be reason they have nowhere to hang out 😅😂

    • @T11CVV
      @T11CVV Před 3 měsíci

      @@ZX-fg6xdyour spot on. I either play footy or go gym for the same reason.

    • @Laura-sg6ss
      @Laura-sg6ss Před 3 měsíci

      ​@@ZX-fg6xdThird place vs what you said...​ huh?😂😂😂😂 it is way less complicated and yeah essentially it's that. And we are missing it fr because we aint got time. It is literally work and home for alot of people.

  • @TheAlkebulanTrust
    @TheAlkebulanTrust Před 3 měsíci +10

    When it comes to culture whether Hip Hop or R&B if you truly have passion for the culture and want to live and breath every part of it you'll study it. It's not a generation thing either. It's just an individual thing.

  • @teeinfinity
    @teeinfinity Před 2 měsíci +2

    We need a PT.2 ...shout out to yall for this dope discussion

  • @capricebandicoot_
    @capricebandicoot_ Před 3 měsíci +10

    1:03 Chuckie, you are right ibr, youngers are more willing to dive into older R&B/Soul music/albums/projects more than older Hip Hop music/albums/projects

    • @Laura-sg6ss
      @Laura-sg6ss Před 3 měsíci +2

      Yeah because it is proper SINCERE! It is so so so like... idk you bare your soul on these records. Hip Hop is great but even back in the day, sometimes it's like... they weren't always hitting certain aspects of emotion because often having to put on that bravado masks that thing that everyone can connect to in such a way. Unless you were a POET like Pac, like you can put the words together so... like mesmerisingly. Also it was alot more closer to those Gospel roots. That power. Exactly what Tazer said about pulling that ugly face when singing and saying you saw the stars when you had sex with a girl, it was sincere.

    • @capricebandicoot_
      @capricebandicoot_ Před 3 měsíci

      @@Laura-sg6ss 🙌🏿🙌🏿

  • @nagamo_5368
    @nagamo_5368 Před 3 měsíci +13

    But sex ain’t a causal thing tho ! We talkin bout it like it ai t nuthin

  • @joyceosawe6732
    @joyceosawe6732 Před 3 měsíci +4

    I don’t think this was touched on but I can understand men having anxiety when going back to an ex relationship/hookup. There’s a big chance the girl got with someone else and now you’re directly being compared to them. It can get in your head and ruin the moment.
    And this can also happen for women too.

  • @rjflores438
    @rjflores438 Před 3 měsíci +12

    The anxiety I feel with women is absolutely horrible, especially in London. Always feels like you are not enough for them.

    • @CP-gq7en
      @CP-gq7en Před 3 měsíci

      Sorry

    • @rjflores438
      @rjflores438 Před 3 měsíci +2

      @CP-gq7en its my own issues mate, trying to get my confidence back after a break up a couple of years ago, but I cant say London is an easier place to find love as a man.

    • @Laura-sg6ss
      @Laura-sg6ss Před 3 měsíci

      ​​@@rjflores438travel - go to Brazil or something and be on the beach and chill. You need sun, helps the soul. I mean it won't fix it just coz you went away but it definitely helps the healing process. If you can. Get out of here. It's gloomy af out here 🥴🥴

    • @Laura-sg6ss
      @Laura-sg6ss Před 3 měsíci +1

      travel - go to Brazil or something and be on the beach and chill. You need sun, helps the soul. I mean it won't fix it just coz you went away but it definitely helps the healing process. If you can. Get out of here. It's gloomy af out here 🥴🥴

    • @MsDarkie93
      @MsDarkie93 Před 3 měsíci +1

      I think a lot of men feel like this but realistically it’s because they’re going for women out of their league. I have so many friends who have low expectations. Offer to take them out for coffee, or to the library and they’ll be all doe eyed for you. But they don’t fit into the typical aesthetic that most men like these days.

  • @Koluvuma
    @Koluvuma Před 3 měsíci +9

    For me I love hip hop, I’m from ldn, 20 yrs old and I love love 90s hip hop. I don’t listen to any rap music today that much. Only a few, less than 10 artists.

  • @literarycompost
    @literarycompost Před 2 měsíci

    this episode really spoke to me at a key point of turbulence so cheers for that. Wholesome to see men opening up about intimate social issues particularly the delivery of charisma and relational banter as flow really kept me watching - the opposite (contra-flux) is hyperreal, polished short-form out-of-context content that relates for a second but you're not left thinking about it in an hour, after a run etc. There's a lot of intersectionality going on here as flow allows for the natural build on/or diversifying subject matter.
    In modernity, it feels like a constant battle between traditional, imposed values and innovative, instantaneous gratifications. I wonder regarding the assimilated 'safe' yet intoxicatingly woke culture of "green flags" that I may advocate for the Amber Flag People. Marginalisation and stigma is what is often shunned onto this collective, when in actuality it is THESE PEOPLE who understand themselves at a more multifaceted level. Made to feel INVSIBLE at the feat of the consensus opinion. Is a growing pattern of similar habits always legitimate or a self-conditioning that makes us feel safe, even when we want to act against these self-constructed enclosures, yet fail to see the self and opt for the grassisgreenerontheotherflag. Lol. Toxic traits aren't always meant to be inhibited OR healed if a significant amount of trauma or lack of character building due to unchangeable facets (100+ job adverts and no esteem to yield from what you sewed, or perhaps the institution is inherently against people who "think differently" anyway).
    -The dream in uproar; as we return out back on selective awareness, to rediscover the horror in what is small, yet one is not so given into humbleness anymore, but made to feel imprudent for remaining the same:
    It's almost like that when the collective isn't giving anything back, and you find that one person in time who does and reopens the inner child inside, that fire spark of human round begins a domino affect. The effect of proper love and intimacy, be it physical or communicative. Sheds the hard shell of cleansed insulation we cloak ourselves as and allows us to stand under the sun as it is, feels less hard: but warm.
    For me the only other affect of this is music. Good music almost equates to an emotional pornography for me. Each time that same song I'm nauseated into a higher state so frequently have songs on loop big time. My last Spotify wrapped racked up 95 genres and what an intimate display of the artists I love, err xD but unfortunately, like most porn users, Spotify is either free or dirt cheap for direct fund pipelines supporting major artists through to grassroots amateur musicians trying to slice... a penny?
    On a sidenote, I would be interested to see what people in the comments have to say about sex in manic states, either gender. I find it's a convoluting dichotomy between associative closeness and blurred vision. You're there, but are you? I'm not sure the last time I felt wholly there, that is, hitting the throes of passion in a relative euthymia.
    The transition between RUFUS DU SOL's Lost In My Mind / No Place speaks numbers (or episodes).

  • @lrmusic4972
    @lrmusic4972 Před 3 měsíci

    This definitely needs a part 2.

  • @saturdayswithlizzie.3610
    @saturdayswithlizzie.3610 Před 3 měsíci +5

    For me my blockage comes from childhood trauma and I never want anyone to take control of me like ever!

    • @SR-fi8ef
      @SR-fi8ef Před 3 měsíci

      Isn't that a matter of trust?!

    • @ne3371
      @ne3371 Před 3 měsíci +1

      Facts!!! This is me as well. When you’ve been through so much stuff you had no choice in, anything or anyone that feels too controlling is a trigger.

    • @Laura-sg6ss
      @Laura-sg6ss Před 3 měsíci +2

      ​@@SR-fi8efyeah... stemming from the trauma in her childhood

    • @Laura-sg6ss
      @Laura-sg6ss Před 3 měsíci

      ​@@ne3371word

    • @saturdayswithlizzie.3610
      @saturdayswithlizzie.3610 Před 3 měsíci +1

      @@Laura-sg6ssthank you 😊

  • @funky1nessa
    @funky1nessa Před 3 měsíci +1

    Very interesting and I like when you delve into these conversations. I agree with a lot of what was said on both parts. Also I think age, financial situations and working too hard can cause anxiety for men. Age as in the older a man gets and it’s tricky if there is a big age gap in the relationship. Sometimes new jobs can interfere and cause anxiety for both genders because if the job is longer than the average working hours, for women it’s less time together and less sex, less availability. Meanwhile the man is stressing on how to balance both work still make time for social/sex in the relationship.
    It’s a lot going on when anxiety is in play for both genders.

  • @Priscilla.i.m
    @Priscilla.i.m Před 16 dny

    Would love to hear you & Richie Brave discuss this🥰

  • @sharonleitch7157
    @sharonleitch7157 Před 3 měsíci

    Observation. Chuckie why are you flicking a measuring tape? Did you edit something out? 😅 x

  • @MrD-tu3hp
    @MrD-tu3hp Před 3 měsíci +1

    Occasionally for the round two is crazy 🤪

  • @CK7Breeze
    @CK7Breeze Před měsícem

    I was literally just thinking about this having speaking to a woman. As a man there is no support or any woman checking in on your mental. A woman will have a man check in on her daily just making sure she’s good. A lot of men are lonely as they don’t have the support they give to a woman

  • @zedz1989
    @zedz1989 Před 3 měsíci +4

    When it’s comes to hip hop the furthest most people will go back to is the early to mid 90s to now, but when it comes to rnb most were listening to songs from mid to late 80s to now. Because those type of songs would be played at a family function.

  • @serena4875
    @serena4875 Před 3 měsíci

    Thank you

  • @lizzylovinlahnz4583
    @lizzylovinlahnz4583 Před 3 měsíci +2

    man said manually bend thats CRAZY

  • @waterbambam7455
    @waterbambam7455 Před 3 měsíci +2

    23:00 the woman has the door or do most men lack self control?🤔

  • @OverFlow407
    @OverFlow407 Před 3 měsíci +3

    Chuckie at 17:21 sent me 🤣

  • @sharonleitch7157
    @sharonleitch7157 Před 3 měsíci +3

    I'd like to address the word 'toxic'. In itself brings negative 'hazardous' definition.
    My assumption is that an imbalance, non conformation, misalignment, disagreement, separation, parting of ways, is not 'toxic' at all. That's a recognition in a healthy way that 2 people shouldn't continue to be together.
    Toxicity is when co dependency occurs where two people do not know where individuality exists and only see their existence dependant on the others validation of them. Usually repeating negative behaviour for attention from each other x

  • @Laura-sg6ss
    @Laura-sg6ss Před 3 měsíci +2

    We need that third place fr. Sorry but EVERYONE COME OUTSIDE MAN I'm sick of this, everyone grow up and just link up in the parks man. On the days where there's nothing to really do and it is summer. Come outside, grab some food and chill, meet some new people. In the winter, idk😂 prince of peckham? Idk but let's find some more places. Coz honestly I've been having this convo with different people for YEAAAARRRSSS, meeting new people can be so hard to do coz it's like where? And because we often don't have that many hobbies anymore, most people can't even start there. WHERE TF ARE THE HALL PARTIES MAN???? CAN WE JUST! 😫🥴

  • @dannywilson5023
    @dannywilson5023 Před 3 měsíci

    ‘Round 2… Big man, that’s not me’ 💀💀

  • @funky1nessa
    @funky1nessa Před 3 měsíci +1

    Also the guy in the background 100% needs a mic. We can’t hear what he says when he adds his points in the topics.

  • @shainissa8237
    @shainissa8237 Před 3 měsíci +1

    If a women expects something on the first few dates money wise, she's not the one bro. That says a lot about the direction of where that relationship is going. How you focusing on money and gifts when you barely know each other. Now I'm not saying don't go for dinner or buy flowers.

  • @bathroomdiaries5393
    @bathroomdiaries5393 Před 3 měsíci +2

    19:15 .. A woman who "comes" when you mention that you're coming....it's giving shes faking it

  • @dro4044
    @dro4044 Před 3 měsíci

    😏 I see how Tazer used "research" very effectively 😂

  • @sharonleitch7157
    @sharonleitch7157 Před 3 měsíci

    Chuckie, change of perspective idea for you. Instead of rounds, call it sets. Identify with 1st on level, warm up set, lipsing for example, 4play, body mapping. Finishing is not the goal.
    2nd on, raising the tempo level, cardio, with a mix from the 1st set in the flow. Finish is compulsory.
    3rd on unifying the participants (hopefully 2 only 😅) most combined orchestral mix of the first 2 sets , middle of the night, sleepy one, rhythm is set, tempo is consistent and powerful.
    Next morning, 4th round, encore, celebrating the harmony from before, and just incase theres a ticket sell out before the next show, the memory is relived, repeated and recaptured for personal growth and completion of the learning experience.
    Till the next time.........

  • @petersbawa
    @petersbawa Před 3 měsíci +3

    Icl 4 nuts 👌🏾 spunned me 😂😂 (Pause still )

    • @logicoveremotion3321
      @logicoveremotion3321 Před 3 měsíci +1

      😂 maudness ...
      One Marathon V Mini sprints
      😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @kjaaaayb6
    @kjaaaayb6 Před 3 měsíci

    This pod is hilarious man

  • @CK7Breeze
    @CK7Breeze Před měsícem

    They said go for a woman you like. No the woman you want or like is long. They either got ex issues. Children. Or self conscious issues that they use too not see you. But they will then give it up to a road man who will dig her out and leave. Then she’s back to being scared because it the dumb mistakes made.

  • @sibusisocece758
    @sibusisocece758 Před 3 měsíci

    Hella why’s in this convo

  • @user-ds3op1qv3h
    @user-ds3op1qv3h Před 2 měsíci

    Well, I should put my 2 cents here but its hard on these streets to get laid as a 47yr old woman. People always think that's its easy for a woman to be have sex however this is far from the truth. Wonder if anyone else experiences the same thing?

  • @FLYSTARTVLONDON
    @FLYSTARTVLONDON Před 3 měsíci

    Get the strap 😮 what kinda meek millz ting ah gwan 😂man said blue 🥎 lava

  • @msxo365
    @msxo365 Před 3 měsíci +1

    At 42:21 Chuckie, he was speaking specifically about wanted sex and a girl wanting a relationship, your gonna be nervous and that’s true cause there’s that pressure, asides from anxiety in other circumstances. Felt like you dismissed him there then after went to Tazer and was more relatable to him, the guy just wanted a perspective in that element cause that’s mostly the case these days and I want to here that from a man’s prospective as a women but you shut that down ffsss cause you was in your debate mode lol

  • @kevin084life
    @kevin084life Před 3 měsíci

    28:46
    41:53

  • @user-xh8qt3ez5s
    @user-xh8qt3ez5s Před 3 měsíci +1

    Love tazer

  • @benja303
    @benja303 Před 2 měsíci

    29:43

  • @Remixprinceisback2022
    @Remixprinceisback2022 Před 3 měsíci

    That's a katt Williams joke.

  • @yasmeenvalenzuela6075
    @yasmeenvalenzuela6075 Před 3 měsíci +1

    18:34 chuckie is right. Don't say it.

  • @KK-sg6vp
    @KK-sg6vp Před 3 měsíci +4

    can we just get Dan back on cos what is this

  • @RGMislam
    @RGMislam Před 3 měsíci +2

    Did diddy touch you chuckie?

  • @grimetip
    @grimetip Před 3 měsíci +15

    Yesss no poet😊😊😊😊

    • @kevin084life
      @kevin084life Před 3 měsíci +2

      Why people hate Poet so much?

    • @vb8195
      @vb8195 Před 3 měsíci +4

      Can actually chill and have this pod playing without getting a headache

    • @ne3371
      @ne3371 Před 3 měsíci +12

      @@kevin084lifeI like him when he’s chill and he’s better now than before but he hijacks the conversation and it’s so annoying when he’s being close minded and ignorant and insisting he’s right.

    • @larkkay
      @larkkay Před 3 měsíci +14

      He has grown on me a lot but its good to mix it up a bit. He, Dan and Chuckie together is my favourite combo.

    • @TulipaBigDipa
      @TulipaBigDipa Před 3 měsíci +2

      I almost clicked off bc he isn’t on tbh.